52 Weeks Towards Divine Femininity

[PrissiSippi]

Y'all, God is so good. I'm working on becoming more feminine while also working on becoming debt-free. And we are soooo close. We haven't taken a real vacation in a while, and I'm getting a little bit bored with this debt-free journey. Not bored enough to want to spend money on a vacation though. I've just been in a frustrated limbo.

Anyway, I started looking up a mini-vacation about two weeks ago. I looked at a specific area and even planned some things that my family could do next month. I calculated the cost and it was EXPENSIVE. But I was like, "God, I don't know how to make this happen without spending a lot of money, but I know that you know how to make this happen." Then I left it at that. I didn't think of it anymore.

Then a friend that I recently started hanging out with sent me a message saying that her family wanted to invite my family on vacation...next month...to the exact location that I was looking up! I'm not lying, y'all! It will be a much-needed time of relaxation and fellowship.

That’s that Law of Attraction in full effect! It’s a powerful thing! Have fun and relax on vacation!!

 

[PrissiSippi]

Why to NOT bring up exes on Dates

1. The past is in the past. It seems like you are unable to live in the present.
2. You would like to portray it like you are the victim, but it comes off as you're unable to set healthy boundaries.
3. You will teach the new man exactly how to exploit, manipulate, and damage you. Stay mysterious.
4. Boyfriends are not therapists. They will resent you for this. Or you will make yourself seem damaged. You are perfect. You are awesome.
5. It creates comparisons between the new guy and your last guy. (You can say things like, "Oh I've always been treated well by all of my exes." But for the most part we should be vague about our past lives. He doesn't need to know about this ex that made you orgasm over and over again lol.)
6. It makes men question are you truly emotionally ready for a relationship.
7. It's BORING. (Men should not have not one negative thought about you while on a date. Keep it light, carefree, fun, and unique. If there is a chance of being too "passionate" or sparking too much emotion.....deflect.)
8. When you talk negative about an ex it makes YOU look bad because YOU chose them. YOU got into a relationship with them. It highlights/creates your unresolved issues....even if there aren't any.
​

 

[PrissiSippi]

This journey is fascinating! I am no longer afraid to ask for what I *truly* want. Right now it's manifesting itself in a prominent way in my work life. But I cannot wait to extrapolate it to my relationships (family, friends, romantic).

Case in point: was working for a SBO earlier this year, as a temp. Initially it was full time, but one day I just woke up, looked at my home and decided to send a mail to my boss. In it I wrote that I wanted to lower my hours: from 38h/week to 30h/week (one day off during the week). She obliged. It did me so well.

I remember one day my niece asked if I would be present at her b-day, it felt like rehearsal because it's the answer I've had for several years now: No, sorry, no can do. Auntie has to work.

I could literally feel how disappointed she was. So out of nowhere I sent a mail to my boss, who ultimately ended up giving me 2 days off, which allowed me to celebrate my niece's birthday in Holland.

Am I currently still at that job? Nope. Do I have memories I'll treasure for forever? Yup. Case closed.

Same thing with this new job: have already lowered my hours, my female co-workers were congratulating me on my decision. They are about that life also: one lady who was pregnant would always take Thursdays and Fridays off. Another lady is currently working part-time and usually finishes work at 4pm. Another one sometimes leaves at 3pm. Another one who is pregnant with her 2nd child, would leave work at 4pm every Friday. Let's reclaim our lives ladies!

I'm all about making memories. It seems like memories make my life much more meaningful. I see a lot of my friends focus on making money. They say it's because with this money they can buy more things, but this is not always where our happiness lies. Our happiness lies in the people we get to spend time with and the experiences we get to encounter.... Material things are also good lol, but it's just the icing on the cake. Without it the cake is still good. Because of this, I try my best to make a few memories a week. It might be making and plating food or going walking downtown or spending some time outdoors. It doesn't matter. It just matters we're having fun and I'm surrounded by people who love all over me and I'm able to love all on them right back. *swoons*. I'm so happy you got to spend time with your niece for her birthday.

 

[Maracujá]

^^^Absolutely! Someone had this to say about the age we live in: back in the days, we had so many good moments, that became good memories, but we have no pictures of them. And now, we take all these pictures, but we have very few good moments, which will result in few good memories.

Today is my day off and I went for a 3-hour walk at 7am, even watched the sunrise and some leaves who are already starting to turn and/or fall. Was listening to some peaceful music and it did me so well. Realizing that there are so many Black men in my city, constantly running into some, it's giving me hope for the future haha. Some look and smile, but I'm still deeply hurt from my past so I tend to not make eye contact. All in due time.

 

[PrissiSippi]

I'm still working on increasing masculine respect to all men. The only way I know how to do this is to show respect to the men I'm in contact with each day. This is how I have changed recently.​

Do not correct him
- The other day he didn't know how to get to Walmart. Instead of telling him he was going the wrong direction, I let him figure it out. It probably added 10 minutes to our time....but so what? I didn't act rushed. I kept the conversation going. We had a fabulous time.
- At Walmart said guy said your DS can get in the buggy. I started to say naw he can get worn out so he can walk with us, but instead I held my tongue and said...Ok.
- He told him it took him 6 hours to fix his bike the other day. Actually it was only about 3 and I knew this, lol but I just smiled and nodded. Old me would have called him out on this.

Do not laugh at his mistakes or faults/ Never be inconsiderate of his feelings
- He BBQed for me the other day. Burned the ribs up soooo bad. He asked me how were they. I never called attention to the fact that the ribs were burnt. I just said oh they look very nice on the top (which they did lol). The BOTTOM was burnt. He knew them thangs were burnt. Old me would have told him and laughed at them jokingly making a joke about his BBQ skills. These days I have compassion.

Do not criticize him
-I'm working on this. I was horrible about this in my past relationship.
- He eats and drinks entirely too much. Lol I laughed to @PeaceLover and said if I end up with this dude I will take out a nice life insurance on him, but I will not mother him or

Do not emasculate him through mothering.
-Ole dude swears up and down that canned green beans are better than fresh. They taste better and are just as nutritious. Whatever dude. I don't correct him in this, but I DO cook fresh green beans occasionally whenever I do cook and he loves them. If he changes it won't be because I badgered him to eat fresh veggies. It will be on his own accord.
-If you want his help, let him do it his way. If you want it done your way, do it yourself.
- I used to shower my past boyfriends with gifts. It's how I like to be treated and they say Treat others how you wish to be treated. However, showing how much you care for a guy before he shows it first (including giving or buying him stuff before he does it to you) is an example of mothering.
-I used to asking one of my rotational guys to call/text me when he arrives home safely. He often did this to do so I did it back. However, this is something a mother would do.
-I used to always remind him to take out my trash. I figured I was helping because he doesn't live at my residence so it is not his responsibility. However, he told me he didn't like that. So now, I wait. I've already asked him once. If he takes out the trash that's fine. If he doesn't I just take it out myself....quietly.
-I noticed that his home is a little too messy....so I don't go there anymore so I don't feel compelled to clean it lol. It's his home/his space and he can do whatever he chooses.
-I'm still perfecting the art of asking instead of telling. Instead of: “Ew! You have a cold! Take some cold medicine.” Asking: “Honey, do you not feel well? Would you like some cold medicine?”
-Other examples of mothering: "I will pick out my husband’s clothes for him." "I do nag him to eat all the vegetables I put on his plate because if he doesn't how will I get DS to eat his vegetables as well?" "If he has any sort of ailment, from a skin rash to a headache, I hear about it first before he takes any steps to address the problem himself." "I ask him not to pick at the acne scars he has on his skin" "I told him he better not eat bad foods or he's going to die from a heart attack" "Telling him how to spend his time....you should be doing xyz since you were off work."

Do not tell him what to do
- Working on my soft sweet voice really helped with this. Can you pleeeeease take out my trash. Even if I slip and tell him what to do I add a please at the end. "Get DS....please." It's really working on making him smile and do whatever I ask him to.
-I've worked on understanding that a man will not parent like you. And if you have a problem with this, instead of arguing/causing attention to it just do it your way...PRIVATELY. This weekend my friend guy came over. I was sooo tired for whatever reason. I wanted to fall asleep but that's a no go with a toddler. I fell asleep for 30 minutes. I woke up with a blanket over me...and get this....DS was sleeping on the FLOOR. On the dead carpet floor lol. I was kinda annoyed and started to say something, but at the end of the day I figured...this child will not die. He DID let me go to sleep, and DS was safe and sleep as well and friend guy fell asleep too. lol I woke up refreshed and happy, and DS could have cared less that he fell asleep on the floor. (Again, If you want his help, let him do it his way. If you want it done your way, do it yourself.)
- I used to go outside with a to-do list and point out every little thing that needed to be done outside for the yard to look nice and neat. (He was soooo lazy at doing lawn maintenance. It was sooo annoying.) However, it screams “Baby, don’t load landscape the yard that way do it this way.” This is mothering. Instead now I let my new main guy do the yard how HE sees fit...anything outside of that realm I ask nicely if it's something big or just privately do it if it's something I can do myself.

Never let him feel replaceable/never play down your need for him
- I asked him to change my air filter for my air conditioner. He couldn't find it. I had to ask ex-DH to ask where the air filter was....but new dude won't know this. Nor did I ask my ex-DH to change out said air filter in which I could have. I'm going to just pretend that I guessed where the filter was and ask him to change it lol.
- I'ma hit that "Oh I'm so appreciative of you in so many ways, honey." when he finishes it.

 

[Maracujá]

^^^Those are very good points. Working on not correcting and not mothering with male co-workers and family members, so hard to do. Like you mentioned, it adds up about 10 more minutes to a situation that could have easily been solved, but oh the peace it brings.

It's no easy feat, somedays I'm more mindful than others. Especially when no one notices that I'm making an effort, I say to myself: bump this. Sigh.

 

[PrissiSippi]

^^^Absolutely! Someone had this to say about the age we live in: back in the days, we had so many good moments, that became good memories, but we have no pictures of them. And now, we take all these pictures, but we have very few good moments, which will result in few good memories.

Today is my day off and I went for a 3-hour walk at 7am, even watched the sunrise and some leaves who are already starting to turn and/or fall. Was listening to some peaceful music and it did me so well. Realizing that there are so many Black men in my city, constantly running into some, it's giving me hope for the future haha. Some look and smile, but I'm still deeply hurt from my past so I tend to not make eye contact. All in due time.

Three Hours!!! lol I'm trying to work my way up to that! I went for an hour walk last night and it was soooo relaxing. My thighs are burning this morning though haha.

 

[PrissiSippi]

A book you ladies may be interested in is Helen Andelin's "The Fascinating Girl," sort of the single gal's prequel to the married woman's "Fascinating Womanhood." It is the founding resource on my burgeoning exploration into femininity. I was unconsciously/naturally doing a lot of things in book already, so it just honed my abilities even more.

The best thing about this book is that it encourages the reader to do the work necessary to become these things, not just pretend to be. Some of it can be a bit nebulous (like the section on radiating inner happiness), but she manages to par it all down to get to the meat of what you need to know. It's also very practical in that she addresses things such as where to meet men, how to become a proficient conversationalist, how to express your displeasure while respecting the fragile male ego, etc.

There are eight specific qualities she posits that men are drawn to. Although the book isn't lengthy, it is dense, and I've found it helpful to use her tips to polish the qualities I already possess, while working out how to express those other qualities in a way that is authentic to me vs focusing wholly on attaining all eight qualities simultaneously. It's a quick-ish read that's packed full of gems. I revisit it often when I am dating, to refresh myself on the techniques or to lighten my spirit (which I have found key to amplifying my femininity).

I'm ordering this book now, love! Thank you!

 

[PrissiSippi]

Hello ladies. I needed some extra time to reflect on how I wanted to get started. My goal this week is thinking about what needs to be done to keep my work at work.

I am currently working outside of the home and truly believe it gets in the way of my femininity. To me femininity = softness. In my workplace I have tried being firm almost to the point of sternness to get the job done.

Well I changed it up and made space for myself to do the work at work so that I can better maintain my softness. I realized much of my hard edges came from the resentment of needing to constantly work to keep up. Of course yesterday was the first day back and I accomplished all my work, left feeling light and happy and with enough energy to prepare my family a well rounded meal from scratch. Then it snowed and so work is closed and the schedule I constructed for myself will fail. I will have to work all weekend. I need to refine the process so that I have more buffer time.

On a positive note I have really great girlfriends. One of them sent me a passion planner. I guess she really heard me when I expressed that I needed to become a better steward of my time. Although I like the Day Designer in theory, the Passion Planner has space for big dream and monthly goals which will fit in very well with this year long challenge. The best part is I will have documentation to look back on. Oh and she printed it with cartoon pictures of fabulously feminine women! How do I upload a picture?

How is it going with using the Passion Planner I'm still using my planner from Target lol but I am using more stickers, colors, and the like this year. It seems to be working well.

I’m still keeping up with my gratitude journal as well. I try to make it a ritual to take a longhot shower/bath, lay out my candles, and write in my journal. I haven’t written this much consistently in so long lol.

 

[PrissiSippi]

@snoop I thought about you this week. The closer and closer DS is getting to TWO I am "TWO" tired to give him all these kisses and cuddles. BUT I've been making an honest effort to still doe the 12 kisses a day and 10 minutes of cuddle time. I've been using this time to read to him about 3-5 times a week. Lol I've seen him grow leaps and bounds. He now says, "Goodnight Moon" sooo adorably cute. I'm hoping he keeps us this love for books. How are you coming along being more affectionate with the children?

 

[snoop]

@snoop I thought about you this week. The closer and closer DS is getting to TWO I am "TWO" tired to give him all these kisses and cuddles. BUT I've been making an honest effort to still doe the 12 kisses a day and 10 minutes of cuddle time. I've been using this time to read to him about 3-5 times a week. Lol I've seen him grow leaps and bounds. He now says, "Goodnight Moon" sooo adorably cute. I'm hoping he keeps us this love for books. How are you coming along being more affectionate with the children?

I've been so busy that I slipped. It was hard prepping for the new school year, going away, house administrative stuff, and time for myself... I paid for it on vacation. Two weeks of torture! Little guy was lashing out and I realized that it was because of the lack of attention. Now that we're back and I am more cognizant of how I interact with him, things are all good! I've been trying to be more calm with the bigger guys and they're starting to calm down some. (Though I suspect going back to school has helped -- new year, new friends, new discoveries).

Overall, I've not been feeling or acting very feminine. My head is all over the place, so I've gone into lurk mode, especially for this week's challenge. Waiting to challenge my femininity next week.

 

[awhyley]

Y'all, God is so good. I'm working on becoming more feminine while also working on becoming debt-free. And we are soooo close. We haven't taken a real vacation in a while, and I'm getting a little bit bored with this debt-free journey. Not bored enough to want to spend money on a vacation though. I've just been in a frustrated limbo.

Anyway, I started looking up a mini-vacation about two weeks ago. I looked at a specific area and even planned some things that my family could do next month. I calculated the cost and it was EXPENSIVE. But I was like, "God, I don't know how to make this happen without spending a lot of money, but I know that you know how to make this happen." Then I left it at that. I didn't think of it anymore.

Then a friend that I recently started hanging out with sent me a message saying that her family wanted to invite my family on vacation...next month...to the exact location that I was looking up! I'm not lying, y'all! It will be a much-needed time of relaxation and fellowship.

Are you me? I could have written this post from start to finish. I have a few more months to go before being debt-free, and I wasn't looking to spend any money either, but I was invited to Emerald Bay this weekend, and I only have to buy my ticket. Everything else is included. I'm packing tonight for a two-day refresher.

(eta: Got back last night, and it was AMAZING!!! Great weather, great food and wonderful activities. Swam with the pigs and got my first massage.
Only two days, but was just what was needed. CAm2717, enjoy yourself.)

8. When you talk negative about an ex it makes YOU look bad because YOU chose them.
YOU got into a relationship with them. It highlights/creates your unresolved issues....even if there aren't any.
​

THIS.

 

[PrissiSippi]

I've been so busy that I slipped. It was hard prepping for the new school year, going away, house administrative stuff, and time for myself... I paid for it on vacation. Two weeks of torture! Little guy was lashing out and I realized that it was because of the lack of attention. Now that we're back and I am more cognizant of how I interact with him, things are all good! I've been trying to be more calm with the bigger guys and they're starting to calm down some. (Though I suspect going back to school has helped -- new year, new friends, new discoveries).

Overall, I've not been feeling or acting very feminine. My head is all over the place, so I've gone into lurk mode, especially for this week's challenge. Waiting to challenge my femininity next week.

Isn't it soooo hard!? I am noticing he is very well rounded and calmer the more I give him attention, cuddles, hugs, and kisses. It just takes me being very intentional about my day and how it will be used. I'm working very hard on this since family is my FIRST priority these days.

As far as acting feminine we are here. Let me tell you this is not my week. My hair is not done (I'm about to get it done now though). My clothes...I've been wearing dresses but I'm not intentional. Today I have on a dress and some tennis shoes because my feet hurt. Just two weeks or so ago I was on top of the world in the feminine game. I was paying attention to how I was walking up and down the steps, how I got in and out of the car, and how I walked. This week I'm like....I'm MUH TIED. BUT This is okay. It's all a journey and a destination. I'll get back "up" next week starting Sunday lol My hopes is that you will do the same my love!

 

[PrissiSippi]

Sooo I asked Ex DH how to change the filter . I didn’t want or need him to change it. Soo I asked new boo to do it. After he couldn’t I casually told him what ex-DH in the form of a question. “Do u think xyz even could xyz (Where exDH told me air filter was).”

Why this dude gonna try to argue me.
“That’s not where it is.” I was so fighting on saying yes it is because such and such told me.

He was like baby why won’t you just ask your ex DH where is it. (Which I had already done).

I was like because he’s not a factor. I just want my man to do it. He looked at me crazy and smiled.

I kept my cool. Stayed coy and quiet. He finally changed the filter. Lol I said oh baby thank you sooo much with a kiss. Bruhhh do I really have to do all that just for my filter. Lol.

 

[Maracujá]

Three Hours!!! lol I'm trying to work my way up to that! I went for an hour walk last night and it was soooo relaxing. My thighs are burning this morning though haha.

I had to: started this new job and all my energy is going towards it. Haven't had time to exercise at all and I'm feeling it. Take your time, I built it up slowly too: started with running, but quickly realized it wasn't for me. That was about three years ago. Then I tried fitness, didn't do nothing for me either. The only thing I love is walking .

 

[PrissiSippi]

I went on a mini date last night. We went food truck hopping. We got some FIYAH authentic mexican burritos and this creamy water ice stuff. It was amazing. Afterwards he took me riding on his motocycle. Y’all I got my motorcycle cherry popped last night . I was screaming so loud lol. After 5 minutes I was DONE.

 

[ms-gg]

I really want to let down my guard and allow men to help me. That is the biggest problem I have, letting go of control and being vulnerable in a relationship, or to just allow a man to help me period (or anyone). I only accept help if I REAAAALLY need it. Trying to break this habit, but it is HARD because it is my personality trait.

My parents use to always brag about how independent I was since I was a baby (lol), never asking for help. In school I never asked them for help with my work, I pretty much did it all without their help and they found that so awesome, you kind of become PROUD of being so self sufficient.

But that attitude carries over into everyday life too, because I am like, "I got this." I can sometimes feel like accepting help is a sign of weakness and refuse it, even when I probably needed it lol. Sigh. It is tough, and I doubt I will break this habit like today or tomorrow, but I am aware of my flaw and trying to work on it more...

 

[Maracujá]

^^^^^Do it! You'll be less tired.

 

[PrissiSippi]

@PrissiSippi
@ms-gg
@Supervixen
@TracyNicole
@PeaceLover
@Belle Du Jour
@SimplyWhole
@snoop
@Maracujá
@YvetteWithJoy
@LovingLady
@Jade Feria
@Meridian1944
@Sweetg
@Brwnbeauti
@LadyPBC
@intellectualuva
@tmv1
@rafikichick92
@cam2717
@CurliDiva
@Dee-Licious
@Jas123




Recap

January- Let's Get It Started
Week 1: Create Femininity Goals. Find an accountability partner
Week 2: Print or Buy a planner. Make sure you write down and plan to do things that encompass your femininity. How many times will you cook for your family so they can practice dinner etiquette? How many minutes will you hold each child a day (10-15 minutes?) How will you polish your femininity EACH day, how will you spend one on one time with your spouse each day? Have you made time to go out with a female this week to talk girl talk? Make a plan, be intentional, and write it down.
Week 3: Be more present- Be aware of your surroundings. Don't be a phone zombie. Practice makes permanent. Constantly work on cultivating your femininity by being very present with DH, SO, your children, and friends. Choose human interactions vs social media interactions this week.
Week 4: Accept him- Accept him for who he is. This includes his strengths, his weaknesses, his goals, or lack of him. He is a person full of triumphs as well as flaws just like you. (This goal is continuous).

February- Tools Every Woman should Have in her Toolbox
Week 5: Polish Your Poise- No one can take you out of your feminine grace except you. Work on not being reactive to problems and asserting your needs but in a gentle way with your actions. Work on your look, attitude, gratitude, gaze, and overall spirit.
Week 6: Self Preservation is Key- Learn to protect your peace. Put YOU first. Have a drama blocking plan to protect yourself.
Week 7: What's in a Voice- Work on your feminine voice. Smile. Have a sing-song sweet voice at all times...especially times of struggle.
Week 8: Look Good and Rock Your Wardrobe- Aim to look feminine, put together, and GOOD every day.
Week 9: Turn Rituals Into Routine

March- Home Living
Week 10: Beautify Your Environment: Buy Fresh Flowers
Week 11: Focus on Your Home Aromas
Week 12: How Clean Is Your Home
Week 13: Set the Tone in Your Home: Make Your House a Haven

April- Feminine Refinement
Week 14: Clean Up Your Social Media Accounts
Week 15: Be more mysterious: Work on your Feminine Mystique
Week 16: Take the Help/Compliments
Week 17: Got Milk? Milk Baths

May- Strategically Selfish
Week 18: You Are the Prize
Week 19: Don’t Let them Move Your Goal Post
Week 20: Put On Your Oxygen Mask First
Week 21: Drop the need to be Right: Focus Instead
Week 22: Who are Your Male Vouchers?!

June- Feminine Refinement
Week 23: Leisure Time/ Become Well Read
Week 24: Be like Children; Not Childish but Childlike
Week 25: Let's Get Some Sunshine
Week 26: Communication 101: Stay in Control

July-
Week 27: Everything can be used against you.
Week 28: Compassionate
Week 29: Know Yourself What's your Feminine Archetype?'
Week 30: Use your Feminine Archetype to become a Force - Hone In On It
Week 31: Wine A Bit; You'll Feel a Little Bit Better

August - Etiquette
Week 32: Staircase Etiquette
Week 33: Pose for Life - Crossed Legs Pose
Week 34: Keep it Classy (Exiting car doors)
Week 35: Sitting pretty

September- The Opposite of Networking is “Not Working”
Week 36: Who Do You Admire: Interview Them
Week 37: Join a Group of Like-Minded
Week 38: Make it Intentional - Date Night
Week 39: How to be a Feminine Networking Star... Wherever You Are

Be a Networking Star....Wherever You Are
​

1. Go with a purpose. Remind yourself why you are there. Give yourself mini goals each time you go out. Examples: I will meet 2 men and 1 woman. I will get 2 phone numbers. I will get 10 business cards. I will have 5 great conversations. Keep the end-goal in mind. (This also means looking the part. The better your appearance looks, the more people will be drawn to you. Look GOODT!)

2. Use inside contacts. Ask someone for an introduction to important people.

3. Go alone. More people means more competition. Talking to people who you already know will lessen your chances of meeting new ones. Separate to Elevate. If you are dating....separate yourself from your friends so you can stand out. Men are often afraid to approach a group of women out of concern of rejection.

4. Control your Body Language. Be friendly, look good, and SMILE with lots of eye contact. What is your body language saying about you? Do you have resting chick face? lol Get rid of it! Be aware of how you stand, how your arms are placed, how you are smiling, and more.

5. Break the ice. Breaking the ice can be as simple as commenting on the event, giving a compliment to the other person, or just friendly non-sexual touch.

6. Ask open-ended questions. These are questions that ask who, what, where, when and how – as opposed to questions that can be answered with a simple yes or no. Your goal is to explore ideas and opinions and also to show your listening skills.

7. Location is everything. Sit near the END of the bar. Once people get their drink, the next step is to figure out where to go....that's where you come into play. If you are standing near the bar, you are at hte first line of sight.

8. Put your name tag on your upper right side. This is the side people lean into when they shake your hand or hug you.

9. I'll keep movin' on....like Mya- Keep interactions short. Once you get a date's number, or you have found out you're not interested...move on. Have a task in your back pocket to leave. Examples are running to the door to greet someone you know or leaving to refill your drink at the bar.

10. Brush up on your Etiquette. Everything we learned so far counts. How will you sit down? How will you stand? How do you walk up and down stairs? How will you get out of the car? How will you greet others? What body etiquette will you use?

11. Don't dress for the weather, dress for the man. (This is especially true for winter months. Girl if you don't invest in a nice trench coat and stockings/leggings. The venue will be warm. Make sure you are HOT. This doesn't include bulky clothes/sweaters, and pants/jeans. Dress NICE).

12. Make them see you. Walk around a little while before you sit down. Walk Walk Walk very deliberately and slowly. Feel the heat from every man in the venue staring at your femininity. They are staring at your beauty. WHEN you get their energy hooked...THIS in when you can sit down. Don't be a fly on the wall. Walk, walk, walk, make your presence be known THEN sit.

Examples of Open-Ended Questions​

• How did you learn of this meeting/event? (If it’s not obvious.)
• Have you been here before? If yes, what brought you back?
• Do you know a lot of people here? (If so, who?)
• What kind of work do you do? (Again, if it’s not obvious.)
• What company do you work for?
• How long have you been at it?
• Do you like what you do?
• What is it about your work you like most? Least?
• What are you looking for here?
• Do you have a target market? (If so, great! If not, why not?)
• How do you market your business?
• What does a perfect prospect look like for you? Why?
• What do you do for fun? (Sports, kids, vacation, hobbies, etc.)
• What can I do to help you? (If I like them!)

Week 39 Challenge​

1. How do you work a room? What tips do you have?
2. Go out. Work a room this week. What is your goal? (Meet 2 men and 1 woman? Get one business contact? Smile 10 times and wink 3? What is your personal goal?)
3. What's your plan to keep movin on like Mya? What's your go to task to leave the conversation?

 

[PrissiSippi]

 

[PrissiSippi]

I really want to let down my guard and allow men to help me. That is the biggest problem I have, letting go of control and being vulnerable in a relationship, or to just allow a man to help me period (or anyone). I only accept help if I REAAAALLY need it. Trying to break this habit, but it is HARD because it is my personality trait.

My parents use to always brag about how independent I was since I was a baby (lol), never asking for help. In school I never asked them for help with my work, I pretty much did it all without their help and they found that so awesome, you kind of become PROUD of being so self sufficient.

But that attitude carries over into everyday life too, because I am like, "I got this." I can sometimes feel like accepting help is a sign of weakness and refuse it, even when I probably needed it lol. Sigh. It is tough, and I doubt I will break this habit like today or tomorrow, but I am aware of my flaw and trying to work on it more...

Okay, let's talk about this. We've all had discussions like this where we felt torn from deviating what we usually do. Before someone felt torn about serving their husband first. Someone else struggled with using child-likeness. I personally struggled with keeping my end-game at the forefront and watching my mouth when I talk.

My first question for you is: What would happen if you DID let somebody help you?

• What is lurking in your shadows that keeps you unable to let go of some of your independence?
• Are you fearful of being hurt or appearing to be needy?
• Are you fearful that you may be rejected when you need help the most?
• I would like for you to take time to journal, reflect, and meditate on what is the true HEART of the problem.
• Why is it sooooo important that you wear the "I Got This" badge?

Next, can you give me an example of where you would like help or where a man would like to help you?
Finally, can you come up with a few examples where you would be willing to ask a man to do something very very small for you? (Example: Could you turn the light off, please? Honey, Could you please help me get the groceries out of the car? Ma Cherie, could you please wait here until I get back from the restroom? What're some requests that you can make that are soooo minuscule that you KNOW they will get done if you asked?

 

[PrissiSippi]

Why Do Feminine Ladies Should Strive to Look Good Every day?​

(When we say you should look good....this includes all senses. This includes feminine clothing and shoes, clean skin, jewelry, nails done, perfume applied, soft sexy voice, eyelashes on, makeup on)


*This lady is always looking just flawless! I'm in awe! ​

1. It's a Law of Power. Everything is judged by appearance; what is unseen counts for nothing.

2. Seduction. Looks play a vital role in the ever-present game of attraction. Although personality can make or break a love connection, we can’t deny the powers of a first glimpse that brings on the butterflies.

3. It's a confidence booster.

4. Increase productivity.

5. Increases your Reputation. Stand out, gain respect, and builds your reputation.

6. Helps Make a Great First Impression. People create their first impression of you in the first few seconds they meet you.

7. It boosts your self-esteem. When you feel better you act better. You feel more willing to go more places. Your mood is brightened.

8. It increases your date's/husband’s image. It's just how the world goes. When you look good, they assume it's because of your husband. He must treats you very very well. You increase his reputation at work and in the community by you being very attractive.

9. Magnetizes You. Helps you to make yourself a magnet of attention by appearing more colorful and mysterious,

10. Men treat you on how high you set the bar. You look basic, you will get basic treatment. If you look slightly above average, you will get slightly above average treatment. If you look like the most beautiful woman they have ever seen, then they will treat you as such.

 

[PrissiSippi]

I don't like it how the guy I date doesn't like my makeup. He is always telling me he would rather see me with my natural hair in a puff with no makeup on regular clothes. I slick feel like this is because it allows him not to put his A game on. When I'm looking like regular degular Priss, he doesn't have to worry much or work that hard to get me.

However, when I put on the makeup, the dresses, the purses, the smile, and scents....all bets are off. He HAS to bring his A game or risk losing me. I stopped wearing the makeup for ONE day. Then I was like...cmon Priss. Just do what you would like. Wear your makeup and dresses if it makes you happy girl! And I did just that! This guy looks like a sad puppy dog everytime he sees me leave lol.

I also put myself first yesterday. He called me up and kinda demanded that he have all of my day. No, thank you sir. I hit him with my sweet voice, "Oh I had other plans honey. I'll have to catch up with you later." I went out by myself and went to a car, watched the game, talked to a few men, got all my drinks and food for free and THEN met up with the guy afterward. Because of it, I had an event packed day, free food, and HE STILL took me out. I was proud of myself for not jumping to his every request. AND THEN I did it in a nice and feminine way.

 

[PrissiSippi]

I really want to let down my guard and allow men to help me. That is the biggest problem I have, letting go of control and being vulnerable in a relationship, or to just allow a man to help me period (or anyone). I only accept help if I REAAAALLY need it. Trying to break this habit, but it is HARD because it is my personality trait.

My parents use to always brag about how independent I was since I was a baby (lol), never asking for help. In school I never asked them for help with my work, I pretty much did it all without their help and they found that so awesome, you kind of become PROUD of being so self sufficient.

But that attitude carries over into everyday life too, because I am like, "I got this." I can sometimes feel like accepting help is a sign of weakness and refuse it, even when I probably needed it lol. Sigh. It is tough, and I doubt I will break this habit like today or tomorrow, but I am aware of my flaw and trying to work on it more...

Your pictures on Instagram are just BOMB! Do you have any tips on choosing good scenes or creating a feminine brand for your profile?

 

[Supervixen]

Hi everyone! I don’t get notifications for this thread anymore. I’ll just start checking in.

 

[PrissiSippi]

Baked Chicken and Chicken Noodle Soup. I’ve let my plating take a back seat, but I’m still working on my skills whenI have company! How are you all doing with plating food?

 

[ms-gg]

Your pictures on Instagram are just BOMB! Do you have any tips on choosing good scenes or creating a feminine brand for your profile?

You are so sweet! Thank you. Tbh, I've neglected my Instagram and really haven't had a strategic plan for it lol. Some of the professional shots were done by an ex while we were out and about, but most others are selfies. I love nature shots and colorful backgrounds, especially graffiti, they make our melanin POP.

I think earrings add feminine flair, and a little lipstick, even if it is a soft pink, almost nude. I learned that from my late mom. She NEVER went anywhere without a little lipstick or makeup, even to the mailbox lol.

And imo, it is all in the eyes. Soft, inviting eyes...

 

[shermeezy]

I don't like it how the guy I date doesn't like my makeup. He is always telling me he would rather see me with my natural hair in a puff with no makeup on regular clothes. I slick feel like this is because it allows him not to put his A game on. When I'm looking like regular degular Priss, he doesn't have to worry much or work that hard to get me.

However, when I put on the makeup, the dresses, the purses, the smile, and scents....all bets are off. He HAS to bring his A game or risk losing me. I stopped wearing the makeup for ONE day. Then I was like...cmon Priss. Just do what you would like. Wear your makeup and dresses if it makes you happy girl! And I did just that! This guy looks like a sad puppy dog everytime he sees me leave lol.

I also put myself first yesterday. He called me up and kinda demanded that he have all of my day. No, thank you sir. I hit him with my sweet voice, "Oh I had other plans honey. I'll have to catch up with you later." I went out by myself and went to a car, watched the game, talked to a few men, got all my drinks and food for free and THEN met up with the guy afterward. Because of it, I had an event packed day, free food, and HE STILL took me out. I was proud of myself for not jumping to his every request. AND THEN I did it in a nice and feminine way.

I would save the no makeup, regular look only for an activity that calls for it, like biking, hiking or working out together. However, I still think a waterproof mascara is acceptable. LOL

He could be saying this to you for a lot of reasons. Maybe he's insecure, or too lazy and doesn't want to step up his game just like you figured. Or, he could be trying to see how much he can control or manipulate you. Demanding that you spend the day with him leads me to believe he's trying to see how much he can control your actions. Regardless, his feelings really don't matter. Changing yourself for others hardly ever leads to fulfillment. Be happy with yourself and all of your glorious femininity! What he wants is irrelevant.

I love how you got what you wanted with a pleasant and feminine attitude.

 

[Maracujá]

Baked Chicken and Chicken Noodle Soup. I’ve let my plating take a back seat, but I’m still working on my skills when I have company! How are you all doing with plating food?

On it:

The result of all these years of putting together recipes and plating, is that it makes weekly menu planning way easier:

Now, granted, most Fridays I order this cheap falafel bread, from a local Egyptian restaurant on Ubereats, but that's just to give myself a break. Feel like I'm doing really good in this area, but lacking in reeling the men in.

Also been making strides in accepting criticism and not taking it personal. Going back to how I used to be like, aging can make one uppity 'cause you tend to think you should already know it all.

 

[TracyNicole]

How is it going with using the Passion Planner I'm still using my planner from Target lol but I am using more stickers, colors, and the like this year. It seems to be working well.

I’m still keeping up with my gratitude journal as well. I try to make it a ritual to take a longhot shower/bath, lay out my candles, and write in my journal. I haven’t written this much consistently in so long lol.

Hi PrissiSippi. Planning is going well but I ended up not loving the Passion planner. I switched to Clean Mama's daily planner. I love that it focuses on the home. I heard a quote that your calendar shows where your priorities are. The Passion Planner was hourly and kept me focused on my outside employment. I wanted to focus on family and the Clean Mama planner has spaces for menu, chores, budget and health daily. It's a much better fit for emphasizing my home life.