# Sex Makes You Stupid



## Raspberry (Dec 28, 2009)

Straight forward and thought provoking...hopefully you ladies can take something from this..

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http://www.christianpost.com/blogs/marriage/2009/12/sex-makes-you-stupid-09/index.html

Dec 09,2009, 4:38PM
*Sex Makes You Stupid*

 			By Mark Gungor
 			It never ceases to amaze me how many times I get asked by people (usually, but not always, women) what they should do when the person they are dating is treating them poorly. And by poorly I do not mean that he was 10 minutes late coming to pick the girl up or he forgot what her favorite flower was. By poorly I mean guys who call these women names and talk to them in degrading ways, guys who look at porn, stay out all night with other women doing exactly what you think they're doing, and on and on. Unbelievably, this is _while they are dating_! You know, the time when the dude is actually trying to win the woman; when he is supposed to be putting his best foot forward!

Honestly, I just don't understand it. For the life of me I can't imagine why a person would continue to date someone who treats them like dirt and with little to no respect. Is this really how they want to spend the rest of their lives? The fantasy world these women live in tells them that "he'll change," but the reality is, it only goes downhill from here! Generally, when I'm presented with this kind of scenario, I immediately ask one question: _Are you having sex with him?_ And the answer is almost always: _yes_.



I finally came to this simple conclusion: sex makes you stupid. It really does. Having sex outside of marriage clouds your vision. People can't see clearly and aren't able to make a wise decision to save their souls. The potent spell of sex causes women (and some men) to tolerate and allow the most outrageous behaviors, continue the relationship into marriage, and then come to me a year, two or three into the deal and want me to unscramble the eggs. When I ask the obvious question, "Didn't you see this before you got married?" they almost without fail say, "Yeah, but I thought it would be different when we got married." It will be different, alright... it will be *worse*!


 Becoming sexually involved with someone outside of marriage is a bad idea for many reasons. First and foremost a reason that not too many people, even Christians, actually consider is: because _God said so_! And when God says so, you think that would be good enough since the Almighty Maker of the Universe pretty much knows what he's doing. If He says, "No," it's for good reason. God created sex and He also knows the power of it, and He knows that it will make you stupid! Stupid _outside_ of marriage, but _within_ the marriage covenant is another story.


 This same phenomenon that makes men and women dumber than bricks when it comes to making the right decisions in premarital or extra-marital relationships, has extreme power when the sex is according to God's plan. The very same idea that "sex clouds your vision" is _wonderful and necessary_ in marriage. God has created sex to have this kind of effect so we can forget and overlook the faults and missteps, the offenses and transgression and forgive our spouse. It's like a drug you can get a hit of that gives you selective amnesia. It's also another reason why married people need to be having regular sex... so they can get a little clouded vision to overlook the everyday annoyances like toilet seats and toothpaste caps and sometimes the way bigger things that need to be forgiven. We _should_ be "dumb" to those kinds of things.


 The Bible tells us that _love covers a multitude of sins_. God has given us the gift of sex, one of the very things that will aid and enable us to walk out this kind of love. But it only works to our benefit if the sex is in the context of marriage. Kind of like the analogy of fire only being a good thing when it's contained in a fireplace. God made sex to be the single most powerful force to bring a husband and wife together and to keep them together. But it has to be in marriage or it is the equivalent of taking the fire and putting it on the living room floor. No more warmth and benefit, just a disastrous inferno.


 So it is with this wonderful, God-created phenomenon of sex. While husbands and wives benefit greatly from the "cloudy vision" of sex in marriage, we should not be allowing this "sex-brain" to impact us outside of marriage - where people are definitely making decisions under the influence of _stupid_.


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## joy2day (Dec 28, 2009)

I enjoyed this article...thought provoking... it further confirms why I have been walking celibate for 10 years, waiting for marriage. 'Cause honey, sex sure did make me stoopid!


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## Prudent1 (Dec 28, 2009)

LOL!!  I've heard it called 'stupid glue' before. I can only speak for myself but that was my personal conclusion too. Clouded my judgement especially if he had umm skillz.


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## F8THINHIM (Dec 28, 2009)

I definitely agree with this!  I was sure stupid for more years than I would like to admit.  Thankfully, celibacy has cleared the fog away and I can make sound judgements where relationships are concerned.  Thank you, Jesus!


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## joy2day (Dec 28, 2009)

Prudent!!!! LOL at the bolded! Thank God for deliverance!



Prudent1 said:


> LOL!!  I've heard it called 'stupid glue' before. I can only speak for myself but that was my personal conclusion too. Clouded my judgement *especially if he had umm skillz*.


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## moonglowdiva (Dec 28, 2009)

*This is confirmation for me. I have been abstaining since 2008. I have made the decision not to give a man access to the family jewels until he is my husband. The cost is too high for most men to pay. That is how you weed out the good men from the fools*.


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## SND411 (Dec 28, 2009)

Can I add money and FOOD as well?


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## CoilyFields (Dec 28, 2009)

This article was great! I need to give it to a few folks...


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## deesquest (Dec 29, 2009)

Good article, I'll pass this on to someone very close!!

As far as the part about "sex is wonderful and necessary in marriage." Yes, it is!! When newly married frequent and intense sex is not really an issue for most people. It can and does "cover a multitude of sins." There is a power in sex that I think sometimes married women foget, especially after they've been married for a while.

Women sometimes allow child raising, careers, fatigue, disagreements, etc--into their marriage beds. Most women would not neglect their duties as a mother. No matter how tired we are we'll push ourself to do for our children. If your child is getting on your last nerve you'll try to resolve the issue in some way. Sex is extremely important to men, moreso than it is to women at times so wives shouldn't neglect this need. But wives must realize they are empowered in a good way with a tool that is to your advantage. Since that is so, sex is not always about "feeling like it."  Sometimes it's about having it just because he wants to or  she wants to. Why? Because part of being a help meet is to meet his needs i.e. sex.  Of course she has needs that he will meet, and those are the emotional needs we women have. Sex can be used to help improve intimacy so that a wife can express those emotional needs she is seeking from her husband. It can also aid in a husband being open to discuss other issues and problems in the marriage. I'm not saying sex is the solution to every marital problem, but it sure is a "tool" so to speak in building and keeping stong bonds in marriage. Right here is a good place for the sexy lingerie to show what you got. But forget the silk bonnet until afterward. lol ! My 26 year marriage take on the issue.


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## honeyflaava (Dec 29, 2009)

I agree 100%! In fact I actually came to this exact conclusion back in high school when a lot my girlfriends began having sex. Some of these girls I knew from elementary school and when they became sexually active it was like they lost their natural minds! I mean common sense, gone. Using good judgment, gone. What I witnessed made me decide to wait until marriage (this was before it became about my commitment to Christ). My mentality is, if I'm going to be stupid over some sex, I'm going to be stupid with my husband...


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## LifeafterLHCF (Dec 29, 2009)

Sex would make you do somethings you said you would never do or try..it will make you stay or beg or even accept being the other woman if he is packaged right.I can only speak from my own experinece that sex will make you stay in a emotional abusive relationship that if you were in your right mind you would slap your own self about..


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## Renewed1 (Dec 29, 2009)

Fallen Angel said:


> Sex would make you do somethings you said you would never do or try..it will make you stay or beg or even accept being the other woman if he is packaged right.I can only speak from my own experinece that sex will make you stay in a emotional abusive relationship that if you were in your right mind you would slap your own self about..


 

I agreed.  But in my case the BAD sex made me stupid.....I'll never be that dumb again....unless its for my hubby.


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## lilanie (Dec 29, 2009)

Thank you thank you thank you!

I have a few friends that should read this, but they'll be sooooo mad, lol. Then again, you can lead a horse to water, but cnt make them drink!


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## lilanie (Dec 29, 2009)

And the reasons outlined in the article are the subsequent reasons for my celibacy, the main one is Gods word against it. 

What I love about Gods commandments is there always built in consequences for disobidience. Stds, unplanned pregnancies with jerks thatll never change, feelings of submission that only subside with Gods help - all those are such deterents, I wonder how I allowed myself to prevent, stall and block my blessings!


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## softblackcotton (Dec 29, 2009)

Like some else posted before, I also decided to keep my v-card for marriage way before I became serious about my commitment to God. Just seeing the irreparable damage and heartache pre-marital sex caused women was just something I did not want to go through. I'm the type of person who learns from the mistakes of others. And more than enough people around me made the same mistakes for me to get it through my thick skull!  It makes dating a lot easier cause if you're not having sex or do sexual stuff with any man, you don't really care as much when their golden facade starts to fade into their true colors cause you don't get as emotionally invested without sex. It also helps to know that I will be 100% protected from men who are not meant for me, STD/STIs, unwanted pregnancy, and screwing up my future. I don't want anything to post-pone God's plan for me.


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## Jenibo (Dec 29, 2009)

This is a good article and now i see why a few of my friends go thru hell and back and allow themselves to be devalued  I loved when he was talking about how it works in a marriage too


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## poookie (Dec 29, 2009)

> This same phenomenon that makes men and women dumber than bricks when it comes to making the right decisions in premarital or extra-marital relationships, has extreme power when the sex is according to God's plan. The very same idea that "sex clouds your vision" is wonderful and necessary in marriage. God has created sex to have this kind of effect so we can forget and overlook the faults and missteps, the offenses and transgression and forgive our spouse. It's like a drug you can get a hit of that gives you selective amnesia. *It's also another reason why married people need to be having regular sex... so they can get a little clouded vision to overlook the everyday annoyances like toilet seats and toothpaste caps *and sometimes the way bigger things that need to be forgiven. We should be "dumb" to those kinds of things.



lol!! ah hah!  that's awesome!  i never thought about it that way.

great article!


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## ms.mimi (Dec 31, 2009)

*Rebellion *makes you stupid! Rebellion NOT sex is the the root of stupidity.Look at David. He should have been at war with his men instead of being at home. If he had been at war like he was suppose to be, he would have never seen Bathsheba. 
Samson rebelled against his parents and had to marry those foreign women and look how that turned out. 
Gomer the wife of the prophet Hosea, was a prostitute and unfaithful
wife. The bible shows us that prostitution and unfaithfulness were the symptoms of her rebellion.
Adam and Eve....rebellion. Adam knew exactly what God had told him. And so did Eve.
One of my favorites is Joseph. He ran from Potipher's wife because he *refused* to sin against God . Even though she was throwing the sex at him (she was in rebellion) but his mind was made up.  Lust and sex didn't trap him because he was not going to rebel regardless of the consequences.
Can sex and lust make you delusional and jaded? Absolutely. But if you dig
it up at the root, you'll find *REBELLION!*


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## varaneka (Dec 31, 2009)

I wonder who here has married when they did because they couldn't abstain any longer lol


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## moonglowdiva (Jan 1, 2010)

ms.mimi said:


> *Rebellion *makes you stupid! Rebellion NOT sex is the the root of stupidity.Look at David. He should have been at war with his men instead of being at home. If he had been at war like he was suppose to be, he would have never seen Bathsheba.
> Samson rebelled against his parents and had to marry those foreign women and look how that turned out.
> Gomer the wife of the prophet Hosea, was a prostitute and unfaithful
> wife. The bible shows us that prostitution and unfaithfulness were the symptoms of her rebellion.
> ...


 
*I don't know if it is rebellion or not. But I do know that sex create soul ties and when you unite your body to another that is not your husband it can create emotional problems. I think that the point that the article was trying to make is that if you don't want better judgement to fly right out of the window then don't unite yourself with someone who may hurt you more so someone who is not your husband. Sex is different for women because we tend to be more relational. Sex for men tend to be physical. That is just by design. We tend to get hurt more when we engage in fornication (that what it is) and a man not so much. I guess looking at if for your pov we must not rebel against God's Holy Word and fornicate. Fornication is considered sexual immorality and a sin against one's own body. Be Blessed.*


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## Mis007 (Jan 1, 2010)

I agree on everything that is written in that article, if only more people did also .


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## SND411 (Jan 1, 2010)

moonglowdiva said:


> *I don't know if it is rebellion or not. But I do know that sex create soul ties and when you unite your body to another that is not your husband it can create emotional problems. I think that the point that the article was trying to make is that if you don't want better judgement to fly right out of the window then don't unite yourself with someone who may hurt you more so someone who is not your husband. Sex is different for women because we tend to be more relational. Sex for men tend to be physical. That is just by design. We tend to get hurt more when we engage in fornication (that what it is) and a man not so much. I guess looking at if for your pov we must not rebel against God's Holy Word and fornicate. Fornication is considered sexual immorality and a sin against one's own body. Be Blessed.*



No where in the Bible does it state this. I doubt God would purposely make women feel a "spiritual connection" while men just reduce it to something physical.

It has more to do with society than design. Women are expected to stay chaste and pure while men do not have as many sexual restrictions so of course some women may feel more guilty than men. This is erroneous of course.


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## Highly Favored8 (Jan 1, 2010)

Yes, I very thought provoking. Yes, sex, soul ties does cloud a persons vision. JMHO


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## moonglowdiva (Jan 1, 2010)

AfriPrincess411 said:


> No where in the Bible does it state this. I doubt God would purposely make women feel a "spiritual connection" while men just reduce it to something physical.
> 
> It has more to do with society than design. *Women are expected to stay chaste and pure while men do not have as many sexual restrictions so of course some women may feel more guilty than men. This is erroneous of course*.


 
*Men are designed differently and that is just common sense there. That didn't have to be listed in scripure.*
*The Lord of God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it. ~Genesis 2:15 That scrpiture is say that man was put here to do something physical which is work. Woman was put here to be a helpmeet to man. Women all through the ages have done things in the name of love because that is what she seek and man not so much. He just wants to feel good for the moment and then he's off to the next object to conquer. Sex is physical to men and yes that have to capability of being emotion but it is considered weak by society's standards.*

*@ bolded Society does not expect a woman to stay chaste and pure because if that were so then Calvin Klein would have many of his models covered up. Look at tv, Nip / Tuck is a good example. They put sex out there like it cost nothing. Depicting man and women engaged in kissing, sucking, caressing, licking etc. I do agree that society has a lot to do with how man and women respond to sex but a lot of time men 'fish for sport' (read they want sex).*


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## Stacy TheLady (Jan 1, 2010)

moonglowdiva said:


> *I don't know if it is rebellion or not. But I do know that sex create soul ties and when you unite your body to another that is not your husband it can create emotional problems. I think that the point that the article was trying to make is that if you don't want better judgement to fly right out of the window then don't unite yourself with someone who may hurt you more so someone who is not your husband. Sex is different for women because we tend to be more relational. Sex for men tend to be physical. That is just by design. We tend to get hurt more when we engage in fornication (that what it is) and a man not so much. I guess looking at if for your pov we must not rebel against God's Holy Word and fornicate. Fornication is considered sexual immorality and a sin against one's own body. Be Blessed.*


 

ITA--very solid points!
It is a sin against one's own body AND it is REBELLION against God's rules. 

No one is perfect but God is oft forgiving & most merciful.


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## SND411 (Jan 1, 2010)

moonglowdiva said:


> *Men are designed differently and that is just common sense there. That didn't have to be listed in scripure.*
> *The Lord of God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it. ~Genesis 2:15 That scrpiture is say that man was put here to do something physical which is work. Woman was put here to be a helpmeet to man. Women all through the ages have done things in the name of love because that is what she seek and man not so much. He just wants to feel good for the moment and then he's off to the next object to conquer. Sex is physical to men and yes that have to capability of being emotion but it is considered weak by society's standards.*
> 
> *@ bolded Society does not expect a woman to stay chaste and pure because if that were so then Calvin Klein would have many of his models covered up. Look at tv, Nip / Tuck is a good example. They put sex out there like it cost nothing. Depicting man and women engaged in kissing, sucking, caressing, licking etc. I do agree that society has a lot to do with how man and women respond to sex but a lot of time men 'fish for sport' (read they want sex).*



I completely disagree but that's okay


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## moonglowdiva (Jan 1, 2010)

AfriPrincess411 said:


> I completely disagree but that's okay


 
*I respect your opinion.*


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## Poohbear (Jan 3, 2010)

The article should be entitled "Premarital Sex Makes You Stupid".


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