# Real Talk: Hair Confessions



## abordeaux (Oct 26, 2008)

What are your deepest, darkest secrets about your hair, haircare, or beauty that you've never shared before?

Here's mine:

If my hair wasn't fine and curly, I would never have gone natural. 

If my eyebrows were fuller, I'd truly feel beautiful. Until then.....


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## JustKiya (Oct 26, 2008)

Sometimes I feel silly saying that natural hair is easier than relaxed hair, considering I have 25 odd years of experience with natural hair vs. 2 years of experience with relaxed.


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## Dposh167 (Oct 26, 2008)

-Im attached to extensions. at first it was just to help me stop manipulating my own hair for daily hairstyles...but i slowly became addicted to them. it gives me that fullness i can't get

-my lack of fullness is the result of my layers taking forever +1 day to grow out. when they finally do grow out...i'll be a happy camper

ETA:

-I CAN'T WAAAIIIIT til next summer when i'm real close to APL. Im gonna swwiiinng and swaaaang my hair in eee'rybody's face hahahahaha (in my demon laugh) lol

-I really hate lying to my beautician about where i get my ends trimmed. I do them myself. But i don't tell her that. i don't trust her with trims...but whenever she asks to do it...and i say no...i feel like she takes it personal


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## jamaicalovely (Oct 26, 2008)

poochie167 said:


> -Im attached to extensions. at first it was just to help me stop manipulating my own hair for daily hairstyles...but i slowly became addicted to them. it gives me that fullness i can't get
> 
> -my lack of fullness is the result of my layers taking forever +1 day to grow out. when they finally do grow out...i'll be a happy camper



Me too! Your hair is filling out nicely, though.


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## achangedlife (Oct 26, 2008)

I can't stand my natural hair. It's too coarse and thick and unmanagable. When I do a long stretch and my edges and nape are all nappy I don't feel beautiful. I tried to go natural before but I used the hot comb and flat iron regularly to try and straighten it and I only lasted 8 weeks. Please understand that this is how I feel about MY natural hair, not anyone elses.


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## sylver2 (Oct 26, 2008)

right now i feel that i don't want to ever go natural....


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## abordeaux (Oct 26, 2008)

achangedlife said:


> I can't stand my natural hair. It's too coarse and thick and unmanagable. When I do a long stretch and my edges and nape are all nappy I don't feel beautiful. I tried to go natural before but I used the hot comb and flat iron regularly to try and straighten it and I only lasted 8 weeks. Please understand that this is how I feel about MY natural hair, not anyone elses.


 
This reminds me of another one. I feel beautiful as a natural, but not sexy. It's hard for me to be that "vixen" that I used to be.


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## sexyeyes3616 (Oct 26, 2008)

I want  to go natural one day but I might have a hard time embracing my natural hair.


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## Nice & Wavy (Oct 26, 2008)

sylver2 said:


> right now i feel that i don't want to ever go natural....


 
Good for you....your hair is beautiful.


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## Nice & Wavy (Oct 26, 2008)

I hate these hormonal breakouts...uggh.


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## drjo91 (Oct 26, 2008)

abordeaux said:


> What are your deepest, darkest secrets about your hair, haircare, or beauty that you've never shared before?
> 
> Here's mine:
> 
> ...


 
I think i agree with the bold part. Then again, i never liked getting relaxers!! I just hated how it burns my scalp and my hair would look so thin.


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## SunnyDelight (Oct 26, 2008)

I am getting better but I still don't comb my hair properly.  I still do root to tip.


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## hopeful (Oct 26, 2008)

SunnyDelight said:


> I am getting better but I still don't comb my hair properly. I still do root to tip.


 
I am often guilty of this too.

I confess that I don't miss my natural hair (only every now and then).  I love being relaxed again.


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## Oasis (Oct 26, 2008)

-I absolutely love my hair.

-One of the reasons I went natural was cuz I saw a pic of me when I was younger and I had really pretty, thick, curly hair. Nothing but napps now! That's what I get.

-I don't love my shrinkage.

-I don't love my frizz. Sometimes it's cute but I don't need to see it everyday.

-I wish my hair grew faster.


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## PinkSkates (Oct 26, 2008)

I love being natural but I HATE SHRINKAGE!


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## Hot Chocolate-LB (Oct 26, 2008)

I had a hair color tradegy that made me do a BC in 2000 and I wore a weave for the first time in my life.  I only gave that up this year in May because I wanted to be a more natural beauty. And I believe that come from hearing people say stuff  things about other people like she's fake she has a weave, etc... 

I just got caught up with certain looks.

The worst part is that I loved myself and lrecognized by the time I was 16 that true beauty is inner beauty!!! 

Disclaimer: There is nothing wrong with wearing a weave if you want to, there is something wrong with feeling like you have to.


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## JFemme (Oct 26, 2008)

I'm in a style rut.  Again.


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## natstar (Oct 26, 2008)

I want to dye my hair a sandy brown but I'm afraid of breakage

I _really_ want to get some shape to my hair but there aren't any stylists in Chicago that I trust to do my natural hair.

i may save up one day and go to NYC to get it shaped.  I hate my uneveness (but I'll deal w/it)

I also HATE shrinkage


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## sexyeyes3616 (Oct 26, 2008)

I want purple highlites.


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## A_Christian (Oct 26, 2008)

I am considering having my hair colored again; I know it's bad for your hair, especially when you have a relaxer, but my hair did fine the first time and I miss being extra "fly" with my highlites.


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## Nice & Wavy (Oct 26, 2008)

I want a change with my hair and was thinking about color...not sure if I should or not.....ugghhh!

But, if I do...I like this:







ETA: oh, I hate shrinkage too!


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## Nice & Wavy (Oct 26, 2008)

A_Christian said:


> I am considering having my hair colored again; I know it's bad for your hair, especially when you have a relaxer, but my hair did fine the first time and I miss being extra "fly" with my highlites.


 
Girl, that's what I want to do too....


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## Auburn (Oct 26, 2008)

I just want 3b/3c defined curls all over.


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## Violets-are-blue (Oct 26, 2008)

I too do not like shrinkage 80% of the time.  I wouldn't care what texture my hair was if it just didn't shrink so dang much. 

I don't really agree with the statement 'Natural hair is easy'. I think it's easy for some and just not for others, no matter the hairtype.


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## michaela (Oct 26, 2008)

Im starting to hate shrinkage also.....i wish i had more patients..


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## jndurieux (Oct 26, 2008)

I love putting extensions in my hair....Even when it was long I would braid my own hair and put extensions in it to add color or change the style.

I like to flat iron my hair...I know it is a big taboo on here but I don't always have the patience to sit under a dryer....I also blowdry sometimes too.

I love changing the color of my hair.

On the upside my hair has never been damaged except for once almost 7 years ago..but that's a long story.

Those are my secrets....don't look down on me...lol.


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## A_Christian (Oct 26, 2008)

Nice & Wavy said:


> Girl, that's what I want to do too....


 


You too!?! 

I like the brown/blond color in the pic you posted. That's pretty close to my previous color combo. Love the bun in your siggy by the way!


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## Nice & Wavy (Oct 26, 2008)

A_Christian said:


> You too!?!
> 
> I like the brown/blond color in the pic you posted. That's pretty close to my previous color combo. Love the bun in your siggy by the way!


 
Yes girl...I need to do something different and lighter hair is the way to go.  I look nice with lighter hair...did it years ago and it was beautiful.

You should do it again

Awww...thanks.  That's my way of trying a ST bun...but, I don't think I got it right...oh well


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## chokolate miss (Oct 26, 2008)

Auburn said:


> I just want 3b/3c defined curls all over.


 
I was going to say that. I love my hair, but sometimes I do wish it was a different texture. Like if i could get a texturized look, without the texturizer, I think I would like that better. But I'll stick with working with what I have.


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## SoOoNY (Oct 26, 2008)

Nice & Wavy said:


> I want a change with my hair and was thinking about color...not sure if I should or not.....ugghhh!
> 
> But, if I do...I like this:
> 
> ...



I loooooooooove that color... i think that i might do that soon... but you would look gorgeous with it!


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## Nice & Wavy (Oct 26, 2008)

SoOoNY said:


> I loooooooooove that color... i think that i might do that soon... but you would look gorgeous with it!


 
Thanks so much!

I love that color too.  When i was at my MIL house last week, she had a Lane Bryant catalog on her diningroom table and when I saw the young lady with that color....I knew that's what I wanted for me!

I'm just trying to make up my mind if I want to do it now, or wait until Spring?


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## ChocalateDiva (Oct 26, 2008)

Disclaimer: This is MY opinion only!!

Confession: I think it is silly to fly to the DC/Maryland area to get Reniece to put a weave in my hair.........................but I still have the desire...


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## prospurr4 (Oct 26, 2008)

Let's see:

- I'm learning to embrace my shrinkage.  I factor it into my hair plans, which is one reason why my goal length is hipbone, so that I can have MBL twistouts. 

- I love my texlaxed hair and don't see myself _ever_ going back to natural.


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## RosesBlack (Oct 26, 2008)

I'm still really self conscious about my lack of styling ability. I find it really embarrassing that now that I have hair I don't really know how to style it cute which is part of the reason why I'm bunning.


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## CollegeGrad (Oct 26, 2008)

I sometimes wonder why I ever went natural in the first place.  I just don't feel sexy anymore.  I'm putting a texturizer in my hair when I go home for Thanksgiving.

I'll post pics.


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## locabouthair (Oct 26, 2008)

I was natural when I first came to the board but I dont plan on being natural again. But at the same time, I do worry about the long term effects of relaxers on the hair.

I am convinced that there are few people that have hair like mine. I have 4z hair and I'm not exaggerating. Even the 4b's on the board dont have hair like me.

If I ever went natural again, I'd color my hair in a heart beat. That is proably the only way I'd ever dye my hair. I aint even gonna try it on my relaxed strands


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## BlueNile (Oct 26, 2008)

RosesBlack said:


> I'm still really self conscious about my lack of styling ability. I find it really embarrassing that now that I have hair I don't really know how to style it cute which is part of the reason why I'm bunning.



Yes! Now that I've grown the dang hair...all I do is bun it.


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## BlueNile (Oct 26, 2008)

1) I would really like to cut my hair to a blunt chin length bob but I know I would be sick to my stomach the next day

2) I would really like to color my hair a funky red/wine color, but I'm afraid of damage

3) I would really like to go natural, but I'm ashamed to say I'm afraid of even more time and effort, even though I would be able to do the color that I want.


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## locabouthair (Oct 26, 2008)

I'm too lasy to use heat. Flat ironing and using a curling iron, take up too much time for me.


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## seashell (Oct 26, 2008)

It's so difficult for me to deal with my new growth, that I don't ever see myself going natural.


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## MichelleMyBelle (Oct 26, 2008)

I am very lazy when it comes to hair styling.
Going natural allows me to shampoo or cowash, deep condition twice a week and style with hair lotion, gel and go.
I love wash n gos.
I wish I wasn't so lazy.  This is why I press my hair only twice a year. 
I love straight hair.
It pisses my off when my hair is straight and men holla like theres no tomorrow, and when my hair is in its natural state they frown and keep on moving.
I can't stand the cattyness of this board.  Relaxed hair is beautiful and natural hair is beautiful.


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## Southernbella. (Oct 26, 2008)

I won't be 100% happy with my hair until I reach BSL. 

I'm glad I had long healthy relaxed hair, because if I'd never had it, I'd probably feel I missed out on something. Now I have no reason to ever relax again.

Even though I'm against using chemicals on children, I REALLY want to dye my dd's hair black because the red/brown color she has looks drier than a desert, even though it's not.

I think my hair looks way better uncombed and undetangled.


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## anon123 (Oct 26, 2008)

lauren450 said:


> Even though I'm against using chemicals on children, I REALLY want to dye my dd's hair black because the red/brown color she has looks drier than a desert, even though it's not.



You might consider using indigo.  It's not a lab chemical.  It's similar to henna, but gives a blacker  color and has good conditioning effects, or so I'm told.

So many things that people rave about and swear up and down are miracles fail on my hair that I'm beginning to think 90% of things we talk about are in our heads.


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## sexyeyes3616 (Oct 26, 2008)

I use to be addicted to weaves.


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## BlueNile (Oct 26, 2008)

mwedzi said:


> *You might consider using indigo*.  It's not a lab chemical.  It's similar to henna, but gives a blacker  color and has good conditioning effects, or so I'm told.
> 
> So many things that people rave about and swear up and down are miracles fail on my hair that I'm beginning to think 90% of things we talk about are in our heads.



And it will stain your sheets and pillowcases ( and anything else it come into contact with ) something awful


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## bigdeelight (Oct 26, 2008)

I'm going to color my hair to a brighter red than what it is now.

I don't think coloring your hair as a natural makes you not a natural.

Contrary to popular belief, just because my hair is 3c doesn't mean it's easier to maintain.

Though I'm a lifelong natural, I've considered relaxing after looking at some of the beautiful heads around here but deep down inside, I love my curls.


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## SimpleKomplexity (Oct 26, 2008)

I'm vain, I hated my shorter hair

I feel on top of the world since my hair is now healthy

Sometimes I don't DC after a poo.... 

My hair is never protected when I sleep.  My intentions are good but the bonnet falls off.


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## LovelyLionessa (Oct 26, 2008)

I don't ever feel like going natural.

I am getting really lazy about haircare. Just keeping it simple I guess. I contemplate rollersetting and then I don't bother. Thank God for braidouts.


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## titan (Oct 26, 2008)

I think relaxers are evil!
When my hair feels too nappy, I straighten the life out it.
I really want red colored hair, but I'm afraid to color it
This is the third time in my life that I 've cut my hair off.
I am also addicted to hair extensions, there fun, you can change up your look so fast.  And I don't like when people look down on you just because you are wearing a  hair weave ,it' s a choice, it is not hurting anyone, and
I paid hard earned money for it.

I feel better now.


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## sensiblesista (Oct 26, 2008)

I'm relaxed and i blow dry my hair once a week AND follow it with a flat iron.  I always deep condition first and use a heat protectant, but even still, I know that much heat can't be good.  What can i say, I like my hair straight, and i'm too lazy to spend hours doing a roller set.


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## scoobygirl (Oct 26, 2008)

I hate stretching.  I would like to relax sooner but I know it's better for my hair and scalp to wait.

Half the reason I wont ever transition is because I know I could not do a long stretch.  But I don't want to BC to super short hair.

Sometimes I think about cutting my hair into a chin length bob like I had in high school, but I am too attached to the length.

I want to color my hair with a really wild color.

I want layers so bad, but my fine hair will have problems later.


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## Mystic (Oct 26, 2008)

I wish I had Bubblin's natural hair - curls, length and texture.  I would never relax if my natural hair was so beautiful.  Dreaming..................


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## Lynnerie (Oct 26, 2008)

I'm transitioning, and if I do not like my hair natural I will texlax without any guilt. 


I spend a lot of time stalking fotkis trying to find hair textures that my hair will look like when natural.  I mean I stalk from BC to month by month comparisons. 

Sometimes I try to avoid looking at the relaxed threads because seeing all the beautiful heads makes me want to stop this natural journey.


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## 4evaRays (Oct 26, 2008)

mwedzi said:


> You might consider using indigo. It's not a lab chemical. It's similar to henna, but gives a blacker color and has good conditioning effects, or so I'm told.
> 
> *So many things that people rave about and swear up and down are miracles fail on my hair* that I'm beginning to think 90% of things we talk about are in our heads.


 
This is my hair too


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## stepfun83 (Oct 26, 2008)

I hate that my natural hair is so short right now. I really wish it was arm pit length right now, so I can rock a big fat afro puff. But till I reach that goal I hide my hair under my relaxed looking wigs.


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## Stiletto_Diva (Oct 26, 2008)

Once my natural hair reaches my goal length I'll probably go back to a relaxer.

one of the only reasons why i decided to go natural because I thought my hair would be the 3c texture that it was when i was younger


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## MrsQueeny (Oct 27, 2008)

I really think I will probably cut my hair off again some time next year.  I really love twa's. Q


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## dyamonds10 (Oct 27, 2008)

I blow dry n flat iron 1 to 2 times a month.  Don't do as many wash n gos as I should per not finding products that work. 

Been dreaming about colors...red auburn etc

Need help in finding a good dc. 

 iam considering mega tek lol

Still haven't found a protective style I like.....ugh


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## FelaShrine (Oct 27, 2008)

I love combing my dried hair.  I even comb it from root to tip.


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## locabouthair (Oct 27, 2008)

***Que*** said:


> I really think I will probably cut my hair off again some time next year.  I really love twa's. Q



I thought you were going for waistlength.


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## Healthb4Length (Oct 27, 2008)

I would be natural in a heartbeat if I didn't have to deal with shrinkage and tangles.
I've been a little too familiar with my hair brush lately and I'm afraid of the damage that I might get from it.


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## joib (Oct 27, 2008)

Even though I need a cut I just can't seem to bring myself to doing it. I tend to be lazy with my hair the more ng I get.


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## locabouthair (Oct 27, 2008)

The one thing i dont like about being relaxed is dealing with the new growth. Mine is very unmanageable.


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## foxieroxienyc (Oct 27, 2008)

I love wearing my hair OUT!


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## TwistedRoots (Oct 27, 2008)

I don't like my length right now...I think it looks terrible worn "down"

I absolutely love my wigs and am starting to feel incomplete without them


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## EleganceUnleashed (Oct 27, 2008)

I've been transitioning for 7 months now and I don't have any defined curls except way in the back of my head.  
I'm reaaaally thinking about Texlaxing.  

And I hate to say this secret but, if I had those 3b/3c bouncy defined curls  or any curl pattern whatsoever....I'd probably would be natural forever and never look twice at a relaxer ever again. 

And I hate that I feel this way.  But maybe acknowleding and accepting the truth about my feelings will help me examine them and set me on a road to self acceptance....

Hell I don't know. Is that PC enough?


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## Irresistible (Oct 27, 2008)

lately I have been thinking about getting a relaxer

my hair is such a JOB! ugh

but I probably wont, I mean I cant see it, I mean I think not, I mean nah I'm pretty sure I wont................


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## Solitude (Oct 27, 2008)

I feel like I should want to go natural, but I really just don't want to. I like straight hair. Natural hair is so beautiful, but I don't even like stretching my relaxer .

I haven't really tried to establish a regimen. I change my products & routine every week. 

I feel like my hair is in an "awkward" phase. It's so tempting to cut it into a nice, neat layered bob.


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## Amerie123 (Oct 27, 2008)

**I hate wigs, and never wore one up until last week. I am growing out a short cut and I just got a relaxer. I am trying to prevent putting heat in it, so i am like in that "in-between" stage, and have no choice but to wear it when it's not done. I cant wait till it's safe to re-sew in the weave; I also don't care too much for weaves neither. I cant wait till my hair atleast get long enough to put in a bun.

**When I was younger (like 6 or 7), I wanted my hair to be like the little white girl on the commercial. So, I did what she did, which was keep brushing my hair right after i washed it, hoping it will get straight by doing just that, and boy, was i sadly mistaken. LOL. Thank God I don't feel that way now, and i love my hair and it's texture. But no one knows about that situation; it was like my lil secret.


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## QT (Oct 27, 2008)

~That I still pat my head like I have a relaxer . 

~And that I have my hand in my hair everytime I blink. 

~That I dread Sundays when its time to retwist my hair (challenging myself to keep my twists in for two week or more , if only I can KEEP my hands out of my head) HIH at its fullest


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## tapioca_pudding (Oct 27, 2008)

I overlapped my relaxer accidentally the other day.  Now I'm scared I'll have breakage down the line.  Might have to start having someone else do my touchups.

I really think that once I hit APL and beyond (and drop 25lbs), I'm gonna be one bad ****.   

A larger part of me than I care to admit is growing my hair out for my man's pleasure.  He absolutely loved me with short hair but always *wondered* what I would look like with longer hair.  Now that it's growing out, homeboy is just in heaven (me too  ).   I ain't mad at that... 

It really irks me when my friends with long glorious hair have horrible hair practices (frequent touchups, weekly blowdrying, wearing hair out every single day).  Whereas if I use a blowdryer two weeks in a row, my ish is all over the sink.  Ah well.  

There is a very small part of me, waaaaay in the back of my head that doesn't think my hair will grow.  It's because it never has before; this is truly the longest my hair has ever been.  So to think that it will get LONGER is just... unthinkable. erplexed

I have severe, severe, severe hair anorexia.


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## MichelleMyBelle (Oct 27, 2008)

I have agree with Que!  I'm thinking about cutting my hair to a twa!  

I use to love long hair...I wanted it so bad. Now that I have it I am having second thoughts! 
*Be careful what you wish for!*  I am looking at all these cute hair styles on the board I use to rock when my hair was shorter...man I miss that.


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## locabouthair (Oct 27, 2008)

kels823 said:


> I overlapped my relaxer accidentally the other day.  Now I'm scared I'll have breakage down the line.  Might have to start having someone else do my touchups.
> 
> I really think that once I hit APL and beyond (and drop 25lbs), I'm gonna be one bad ****.
> 
> ...



I feel you


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## Nice & Wavy (Oct 27, 2008)

***Que*** said:


> I really think I will probably cut my hair off again some time next year. I really love twa's. Q


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## hairsothick (Oct 27, 2008)

I want to go natural, but I'm scurred.  I think my natural texture would be beautiful if it is anything like my new growth, but would be a monster to deal with for the first year or two.

I'd would do it in a heartbeat if I was 3 a/b textured.  And no I don't hate myself. lmao

I'm glad my hair is thick and I'm working to make it even thicker.

I want to dye my hair blue black.  I'll settle for a jet black rinse though.


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## hairsothick (Oct 27, 2008)

Oh and I confess that I STILL believe that certain textures have a tendency to grow faster/retain length better. *runs*


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## MrsQueeny (Oct 27, 2008)

locabouthair said:


> I thought you were going for waistlength.


I am pretty much there and going for full waistlength now. So the cut will probably be after I complete that challenge.  Q



msbrady101 said:


> I have agree with Que!  I'm thinking about cutting my hair to a twa!
> 
> I use to love long hair...I wanted it so bad. Now that I have it I am having second thoughts!
> *Be careful what you wish for!*  I am looking at all these cute hair styles on the board I use to rock when my hair was shorter...man I miss that.


Yeah I hope the feeling passes me once I finish this last challenge. Q



Nice & Wavy said:


>


 Q


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## crazydaze911 (Oct 27, 2008)

No matter what anyone says - i do believe some people just grow beautiful long hair effortlessly - like my sister - and im jealous


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## *~*Afrolicious*~* (Oct 27, 2008)

- I want my hair to grow longer, but I secretly despise my hair as it gets longer.  I straightened my hair on Saturday and discovered that I grew an inch BELOW APL.  Being natural, I feel like most cuter, funkier styles require shorter natural hair and as mine continues to grow I feel like I am more limited in my choices.

- I when my hair reaches BSL or an inch or two below BSL (stretched) I'll probably hack off my hair to a little bit above shoulder length.


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## JerriBlank (Oct 27, 2008)

kels823 said:


> I overlapped my relaxer accidentally the other day.  Now I'm scared I'll have breakage down the line.  Might have to start having someone else do my touchups.



Oooohhhh!!Did you update your fotki?

When my hair is down(not braided)i use heat way more than i should,but i can't help it...

When my hair gets to apl,I don't see myself bothering with bunning it consistently.I'll probably be wearing it down a lot

I play in my hair sooo much when its down its not even funny.
Its subconscious though;but i don't stop when i catch myself.


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## Mrs.Green (Oct 27, 2008)

Real Talk:

I thought I'd be happy once I hit APL now that I'm there I won't be happy till BSL 

I am getting lazy with the rollersetting regimen. It's easier to blowdry and bump the ends with the big barrel curling iron real quick.  I've only done it two weekends in a row hopping next week I'll actually rollerset  

But I get the same exact look and bounce in 30 min oppose to 3 hours rollersetting and wrapping **excuses, excuses* running off to search heat threads**


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## LunadeMiel (Oct 27, 2008)

*I'm so upset that I waited to so long to go natural... When I think of all the hair that I would have right now had I mad the decicion earlier...*sigh*
*I think my hair is gorgeous and can't wait to see it get longer
*My hair is so much easier to take care of now...*sigh* I don't know what took me so long to hack off the relaxed hair...*sigh*...I would have been waist by now *sigh*


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## pearcey (Oct 27, 2008)

I want both natural and straight hair.  Poor SO.  I love my natural hair until it gets about shoulder length, at that point I want to relax it but then it never gets straight, so I go natural again...

I am trying really hard to let it get to my booty this time, LOL!!! then I won't ever be able to go natural again, at least according to SO

What's the greek myth where something keeps getting eaten up and after it grows gets eaten up again??...well you get the picture, that's my hair life...bipolar, it doesn't just affect the mind, it affects the hair too [TMI  ]


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## LadyChe (Oct 27, 2008)

I want thick hair.SO.FREAKING.BAD.

Looking through everyone's fokti's, especially the ones that are popular on this board - IMHO thickness is the #1 precursor for beautiful hair, followed by length. 

I mean, what are us thin haired folk to do? My hair is below BSL now, and I only wear it in a bun because I'm a little self conscious about it. Sigh...


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## NYAmicas (Oct 27, 2008)

I cant work with my NG, it's like a real battle when I make it to 10 weeks post and reverts like no other in the presence of water.

I need to step my braid-out game up. I took my hair out today and it came out alright.

I want to lighten my hair color but I'm too afraid it'll break off crazy like it did years ago.

I cant handle the thickness of my hair at all. My hair looks like the girls' from _The Ring_ sometimes.


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## locabouthair (Oct 27, 2008)

Mrs.Green said:


> Real Talk:
> 
> I thought I'd be happy once I hit APL now that I'm there I won't be happy till BSL
> 
> ...



do you pincurl afterwards? the thing i like about rollersetting is that it makes my curls last longer. when I would use heat, it wouldnt last very long.


----------



## Ediese (Oct 27, 2008)

I'm seriously considering relaxing my hair. 

I haven't washed my hair in a month, and don't plan on washing it until I take out my sew-in.  

UM...I didn't say anything when my weavologist braided my hair too tight, and now I'm going to have serious issues with my hairline when I take out my sew-in.\

I love natural hair, but I miss my straight sleek relaxed hair when it looked good (which was seldom).

I think I'll probably get a 'Too Sexy for you" complex when I get to MBL/WL. lol 

I hate getting even .00001 centimeter of hair trimmed.

I'm really anxious of being 100% natural, but I refuse to cut off my relaxed ends. 

My natural hair is very thick, dry and difficult to manage. I secretly dream of finding a great moisturizer that will keep it nice and soft.

I'm growing my hair long because I know that it is possible, and I love the way that I look with long hair. I'm also secretly growing it because I know a lot of men find it sexy. 

I wish my entire head had perfectly coiled curls.


----------



## unalteredone (Oct 27, 2008)

sensiblesista said:


> I'm relaxed and i blow dry my hair once a week AND follow it with a flat iron.  I always deep condition first and use a heat protectant, but even still, I know that much heat can't be good.  What can i say, I like my hair straight, and i'm too lazy to spend hours doing a roller set.




me too, exactly.

- also, i don't think that i truly believe that I will be able to grow my hair to BSL, even though i'm trying to do the right things ( excepting the above, of course) and had APL hair as a child.

- I don't like the way braids look.


----------



## Ebony Majesty (Oct 27, 2008)

sexyeyes3616 said:


> I want purple highlites.



me too!

I love my natural hair but i confess that I don't comb it as often as I should
I can't see myself going back to relaxed hair
I wish I went natural earlier!


----------



## BrownEyez22 (Oct 27, 2008)

Even though I am enjoying being a new natural and learning about my hair, I don't honestly see myself as a natural for "life"... maybe 3 or 4 years

But I can see myself transistioning to natural again, if I did relax or texlax. I liked the look of the BC and short cuts on me. Sooo.


----------



## heyfranz (Oct 27, 2008)

I'm secretly angry at myself for relaxing again.  If i'd found LHCF before i relaxed, i'd still be a natural.  Now i want to transition again - for the 3rd time, but i'm afraid it just won't work out for me because even though i loved my hair as a natural, it grows longer when relaxed. My siggy is after being doing a bc and being natural for one year, and that's all the growth i retained...


----------



## Lyoness (Oct 27, 2008)

I can't wait to get rid of my ends, since my hair is like chalk and cheese, but I wont give up my length!! 

I'm worried that when I am natural I wont be able to handle my hair! I'm not giving up now though!


----------



## bermudabeauty (Oct 27, 2008)

Its been getting cold here and I don't want my hair to airdry, but since my hair has gotten longer it takes way too long to dry in the hooded dryer, so I confess... Once a week for about 5wks I have been blow drying my hair!  No judgements please.  LOL.  I have however, put my hair in a full weave so I can give my hair a break for awhile.


----------



## 1QTPie (Oct 27, 2008)

sylver2 said:


> right now i feel that i don't want to ever go natural....




LOL!  You have like 12 years of new growth so technically, you are natchul whether you admit it or not.  _*waiting 'til the other 2/3rd of your hair revolts and become natural too.*_



I have no confessions. My hair is boring.


----------



## msa (Oct 27, 2008)

I like to wear Celie braids, not just under my wig, but out of the house with no wig. I won't do it if I'm going to church or work, but if I'm just going to the store or to work out or the mall I'll do it. I love it.


----------



## CurliDiva (Oct 27, 2008)

I’m impatient for my natural hair to GROW! It seems like it grew faster when I abused it, greased my scalp and barely ever conditioned! 

Although I want MID BACK length natural hair, I have not clue of how I would style it.  I'm afraid that I will have to straighten constantly to show any length and have it look stylish.
 
  I get irritated when some seem to go from a twa to APL in months and I been trying to get to APL for over a year.


----------



## shmmr (Oct 27, 2008)

I have an appt to get a relaxer on Nov 5th. I'm 100% ready for it. 

I wish my hair was thicker. 

I can't stand straggly ends, got a cut last Thurs (so I'm still SL) and wish more ladies on this board would do the same (no comments please). 

I wish I could find a hairdresser like Renience here in ATL - one who will also teach me how to do right by my hair at home. (PM me if you know of oneerplexed).


----------



## Naemone (Oct 27, 2008)

I don't think relaxed hair is as good as our natural hair(that we all have because it grows out of our scalps, whether we choose to relax shortly after or not.)

That's it!


----------



## TLC1020 (Oct 27, 2008)

I had a setback and I am so disappointed and mad at myself for it I could just scream . Now it seem like my hair is a totally different texture and it do not have the fullness or thickness that I am used too having .


----------



## Mrs.Green (Oct 27, 2008)

locabouthair said:


> do you pincurl afterwards? the thing i like about rollersetting is that it makes my curls last longer. when I would use heat, it wouldnt last very long.


 
Yep  I pincurl or wrap throughout the week.  During the week I'm good,  I've just been taking the easy route during the weekend after wash/deep condition by blow drying and curling erplexed


----------



## jevetta (Oct 27, 2008)

I really wish I had started good natural hair care when I was a teen.  My nappy hair was a shiny black, and very thick.  I could have grown it long, because I didn't have to style it for work or anything.  
I hated my hair relaxed, it depressed me.  It would hang so limp and nasty, like a living thing had been killed.
I would like to grow my hair long enough to wear two braids that reach to the boobs, grandma braids.  Jeve


----------



## GV-NA-GI-TLV-GE-I (Oct 27, 2008)

Don't kill me.  I sometimes feel that Black people have cursed hair!  That's the truth.  Then I calm down, stop blaming G-d for my poor haircare choices, and embrace the mess I got myself into lol.  You can go crazy dealing with hair!  Especially dealing any of the 1 billion varieties of "ours."  I don't hate myself.  I'm just trying to cut my addiction to creamy crack...so instead of "angel dust aka strong relaxer"  I'm doing "cocaine aka texturizer" to control these coils. Oh l-rd.  Sigh...  I love myself,I love myself, I love myself.  Black is beautiful (without this mantra, I'd be a baldie!)  Y'all asked for the truth.


----------



## locabouthair (Oct 27, 2008)

hwiseman said:


> Don't kill me.  I sometimes feel that Black people have cursed hair!  That's the truth.  Then I calm down, stop blaming G-d for my poor haircare choices, and embrace the mess I got myself into lol.  You can go crazy dealing with hair!  Especially dealing any of the 1 billion varieties of "ours."  I don't hate myself.  I'm just trying to cut my addiction to creamy crack...so instead of "angel dust aka strong relaxer"  I'm doing "cocaine aka texturizer" to control these coils. Oh l-rd.  Sigh...  I love myself,I love myself, I love myself.  Black is beautiful (without this mantra, I'd be a baldie!)  Y'all asked for the truth.



I used to feel like that too, so it's ok. I used to DREAD getting my hair done.


----------



## glamazon386 (Oct 27, 2008)

I am very low maintenance when it comes to everything. Hair, nails, makeup, etc. People seem to think the opposite but I'm not. Just because those things are kept up 99% of the time it doesn't mean I put hours into that maintenance.


----------



## Ediese (Oct 27, 2008)

glamazon386 said:


> I am very low maintenance when it comes to everything. Hair, nails, makeup, etc. People seem to think the opposite but I'm not. Just because those things are kept up 99% of the time it doesn't mean I put hours into that maintenance.


 
Great progress in your siggie!


----------



## KEWLKAT103 (Oct 27, 2008)

*-It really bothers me to walk in a room full of AA women and be the only one wearing my own hair on my head.*

*-When someone on here complains that people think all AA women with long hair is fake, I understand why.*


----------



## glamazon386 (Oct 27, 2008)

Oh yeah and how about I HATE MY THIN HAIR.


----------



## chebaby (Oct 27, 2008)

i dont like my flat ironed hair anymore. i went back to co washing everyday.


----------



## tocktick (Oct 27, 2008)

I'm only taking a break from protective styling in June/July because of my graduation. If I wasn't graduating, I would keep my hair in braids completely until I reached BSL. The break is likely to be for 1-2 weeks and then it's back in braids.

Quite a few people want me to take my extensions out and wear my natural hair and I've considered it. But then I remember that it makes the time I take getting ready much longer and comes attached with a whole host of other maintenance issues that I cannot be bothered to deal with on a daily basis, even if I was only going to leave my hair out for 1 week.

Truthfully, I don't like my hair at the stage that it is in right now. The longer it gets, the nicer it looks and the nicer *I* look. Short hair doesn't look that great on me - this is partially why I always used to stretch and blow-out my hair.


----------



## tapioca_pudding (Oct 27, 2008)

I can't for the life of me figure out how to pincurl.  I have watched every youtube, metube and yomommas tube.  I just can't get it.


----------



## Iluvsmuhgrass (Oct 27, 2008)

Sometimes I wanna grow it then I wanna cut it off
Damn near died when I had to comb it out

Sorry... I had an Usher moment.


My confessions: 

1. I find something that works... my hair flourishes,,, then I get lazy. 
2. I can NOT roller set. Thank Jeebus (Simpsons episode) for curlformers.
3. I find stuff I LOVE after I use it up, I can't find it anymore. 
4. My temples hate binding of any kind. I finally got them to thicken up, then I used a silk scarf to air dry and I'm almost back where I started.  (And I didn't tie it tight at all.... roar.


----------



## Evazhair (Oct 27, 2008)

I am tired of having bins of products. It's crazy how good I feel to finish something and throw the package away.
I am tired of rollersetting right now, but I will continue to do it.
I really only feel like wearing a  braid with ends tucked in right now.


----------



## azucar (Oct 27, 2008)

I hate my fine/thin hair, but I learning to work with what I've got.
I love sengelese twist but my fine/thin hair can't take it I will be back to no edges.


----------



## glamazon386 (Oct 27, 2008)

kels823 said:


> I can't for the life of me figure out how to pincurl.  I have watched every youtube, metube and yomommas tube.  I just can't get it.



I never figured it out either.


----------



## gymfreak336 (Oct 27, 2008)

I want to color my hair again
If my hair doensn't get back to normal soon I will have to cut it. I am just too impatient


----------



## JessCNU (Oct 27, 2008)

I love being black (before anybody questions that)
but I hated MY natural hair....
it looked like the back of a sheep's bootay no matter what I did to it.


----------



## wonderstar (Oct 27, 2008)

If my hair was thick/er I would have relaxed bone straight.


----------



## Blaque*Angel (Oct 27, 2008)

this should be called the natural confession thread


----------



## wonderstar (Oct 27, 2008)

Blaque*Angel said:


> this should be called the natural confession thread


 
You're probably right.


----------



## msa (Oct 27, 2008)

Blaque*Angel said:


> this should be called the natural confession thread



For real. Apparently nobody likes theirs


----------



## princessnad (Oct 27, 2008)

If I had to BC, I would NEVER have decided to transition.


----------



## justsimply (Oct 27, 2008)

I've cut my hair more times than I can count but I'm really not a big fan of short hair on me.  I like when people are amazed at how fast my hair grows...

I really thought my hair grew faster than most so I would cut it really short in a heart beat.  I've even shaved the back and had the rest so short I just brushed it.  Then at almost 40 I found this site and realized that it grew at an average rate and I retained length because I'm lazy and don't do much to my hair aka less manipulation (lol).  I mean I change it up often but then will wear it that style for weeks.  I've always liked to tie it down at night then pull off the scarf and go in the morning.  

I think one of the major reasons I've enjoyed being natural in the past and now is because it's different than most of the black ladies in my area and I've always felt the NEED to be different.


----------



## brucebettye (Oct 27, 2008)

I love my texlaxed hair.  I can do a wash & go everyday if I want to!!!  If I keep my hair damp & moist I do not have to comb my hair for about two weeks!!!  I am soooo lazy, that is why I wear a puff or my hair down everyday.  My hair is so easy to deal with now that I will never go back to being natural or relax bone straight!!!!!  I love the way my hair shrinks up & I do not use any direct heat on my hair because it is too much work.

The only think I hate about my hair is that it is not longer.  All these beautiful ladies with all this long hair is making me want long hair!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## sunshinebeautiful (Oct 27, 2008)

I will not go natural again unless I plan on locking.


----------



## Akemi (Oct 27, 2008)

--I haven't been feeling very pretty lately because my twist-outs never end up the way I want them to. 
--My hair is really getting on my nerves. It's so difficult to deal with and I've been having breakage.
-- I wish I had Tracee Ellis Ross' hair.


----------



## BlueNile (Oct 27, 2008)

lauren450 said:


> I won't be 100% happy with my hair until I reach BSL.
> 
> I'm glad I had long healthy relaxed hair, because if I'd never had it, I'd probably feel I missed out on something. Now I have no reason to ever relax again.
> 
> ...



See Lauren? This is what I'm talking about. When I see that pretty thick natural hair I'm GREEN with envy


----------



## smitmarv (Oct 27, 2008)

sexyeyes3616 said:


> I want  to go natural one day but I might have a hard time embracing my natural hair.



This is me as well.  I am a little fearful even.  It has been at least more then 20 years since I was natural and I just remember how course and hard to deal with my hair was.  I hope now that I have more knowledge I can deal with it more easily and yes embrace my natural hair texture.  But I have to say, I am not truly ready to make that leap just yet.


----------



## BlueNile (Oct 27, 2008)

Ebony Majesty said:


> me too!
> 
> I love my natural hair but i confess that I don't comb it as often as I should
> I can't see myself going back to relaxed hair
> I wish I went natural earlier!



Arg, ok Ebony you're another one that makes me drool over natural hair 

That afro!!!!


----------



## BlueNile (Oct 27, 2008)

bermudabeauty said:


> Its been getting cold here and I don't want my hair to airdry, but since my hair has gotten longer it takes way too long to dry in the hooded dryer, so I confess... Once a week for about 5wks I have been blow drying my hair!  No judgements please.  LOL.  I have however, put my hair in a full weave so I can give my hair a break for awhile.



OT, Bermuda you remind me so much of one of my childhood friends


----------



## productjunkie814 (Oct 27, 2008)

While I love being natural, I think I BC'd too soon


----------



## Highly Favored8 (Oct 27, 2008)

I wil NOT cut, trim, or dust my ends again until I reach  Thick healthty  BSL .


----------



## clarity2008 (Oct 27, 2008)

I confess:

I dont protect my hair at night unless it is straight.

3b/c textured hair not all its cracked up to be and is unmanageable.

I really want to relax, but I'm afraid of breakage.

I'm also in a style rut.  I have been wet bunning for 5000000 years.


----------



## C.Nicole (Oct 27, 2008)

Im crying everyday about my BC on this upcoming friday...


----------



## MrsQueeny (Oct 27, 2008)

msa said:


> For real. Apparently nobody likes theirs



No I love mine. I am not into length like I used to but I love my hair!!!! Q


----------



## Evolving78 (Oct 27, 2008)

i wish i had flawless skin.  then i would be more comfortable to just be.  i shouldn't have let my dh and his issues get to me, causing me to straighten my hair and then cutting it again.  it would be really long now.  i'm resentful of him for that everyday.


----------



## smwrigh3 (Oct 27, 2008)

sexyeyes3616 said:


> I want purple highlites.



ME 2!!! but I just pretend with my homemade clip-ins!


----------



## Kay.Dee (Oct 27, 2008)

I wish my hair was jet black instead of being a dull black.  It makes my hair look dry even though it is not and it doesn't help that I'm natural. It's always been this way, even when I was relaxed.   I don't want people do assume I do nothing to my hair since having nappy hair is already a "strike" against me to some.  I'm going to investigate and find an Aveda salon to learn about some options!

But I still love my natural hair.


----------



## HollyGolightly1982 (Oct 27, 2008)

I have been telaxing my hair for about 4 yrs now and no one ever noticed. 

My hair is SO thin and I hate it.

I want to buy a bob wig but I am scared someone is going to snatch it off my head


----------



## SoAnxious12 (Oct 27, 2008)

i confess:

I freakin luv my weird *** hair texture... but i'm noticing as it gets longer the bulk of it is thicker and my straight roots (yes natrually straight) are getting thinner... It irks me!

I need/want longer hair just to be a coneited B****H lol! I just really want to swaaaaaaaaaaaang it in sum skanks ugly arse weave (only the ugly weave on a skank.. everybody else is good)

If i lost more weight and grew my hair longer... you wouldn't be able to tell me my name and i'd prolly have no friends due to all my brand-newness lol


----------



## Kay.Dee (Oct 27, 2008)

HollyGolightly1982 said:


> I want to buy a bob wig but I am scared someone is going to snatch it off my head


 
One of the reasons why I haven' bought a wig.  And for some reason I just don't think I look believable.  I look like a women wearing a wig and everyone is going to know it.  Nothing natural looking about it!


----------



## Auburn (Oct 27, 2008)

Too many mannequin heads creep me out


----------



## tiffupretty (Oct 27, 2008)

i wish my arms wouldnt get so tired when i attempt to style my hair...only one section would look nice...an itty bitty section at that....

i hate it when people make negative comments when someone has a weave...*shes trying to be fake* i like a real woman....but a woman with braids...with added hair..thats not considered the "same thing"..extensions are extensions.

i hate to wrap or tie my hair up at nite.


----------



## LionQueen (Oct 27, 2008)

I have had so many setbacks, that I've been afraid of my hair for a lot of my life.
Sometimes it seems like anything I try to do with it will damage it.
I have moments when it seems things have finally stabilized, and then here comes new damage/breakage, and I'm right back where I started.

I don't want to be afraid of my hair anymore.


----------



## kblc06 (Oct 27, 2008)

-My hair is giving me the blues right now, so I straightened it (for the second time in 2 months)
-I wish I had my mothers hair texture (it's more tightly coiled but very silky)
-I get personal satisfaction from "dusting" my ends; I honestly think I'm slightly OCD
-I enjoy wearing styles that show off my texture; I also enjoy getting compliments from people who say it looks like Indian hair (because I think textured Indian hair looks gorgeous and heavy....as does natural black hair..but w/out the heavyness) . Did I mention I hate political correctness?
-And I totally agree with SOANXIOUS; I'm working on losing weight now. When I get back to my old measurements (34D/32DD-24-36) with TBL hair, I'll throw my sh%t in your face and tell you its potpourri 
-I'm seriously afraid of inflicting a setback or having to do a serious cut that I've become paranoid about wearing my hair down


----------



## grnidmonster (Oct 27, 2008)

I dont feel as attractive with my sl/apl hair...i want my bsl hair back

I want to dye my hair blonde like Beyonce, or Blu Cantrell

I would love to texlax but, I'm afaird it will all fall out.


----------



## Encore (Oct 27, 2008)

i really dont like wigs

i hate women with tracks and they are showing. 

i loved wen i had long hair (natural) i was thinking about going back but i cant BC i wud look like an alien, so maybe in a few years ill transitition


----------



## Tarae (Oct 27, 2008)

As much as I like SE Lye relaxer, I think I might have to switch.  My hair is noticeably thinner (and I only use Mild) since I started using it.  I don't know what to do.

I HATE protective styles but I want WL so I'm sucking it up.


----------



## frankie (Oct 27, 2008)

I love my natural hair 
I agree with Lauren450 my hair looks better when it's uncombed...my hair likes to be FREE!!!
I love that my hair is getting bigger


----------



## 2inspireU (Oct 28, 2008)

I don't care if your hair is long, short, relaxed or natural; as long as it is yours I'm fine with it. However, weave I cannot stand. Especially weave that is apparent. 

I'm sacred to death to texlax my hair, but I bought everything already to do it. In addition, I really want to, but the thoughts of thinning hair, hair breakage and some parts of my hair straightening scares me.


----------



## MonPetite (Oct 28, 2008)

If I hadn't BCed I'd be WL by THIS December. I've actually cried about it.

With MT I should be WL by December '09. It gives me far more hope than it should.

I've never had short hair before in my life and never will again. It's just not for me.

I must also admit being raised around Chinese and Japanese culture and indulging in Japanese pop culture skews my views on beauty towards hair more than I'd care to acknowledge. I had internalized more of the "Rice-Bran Beauty" standard than I'd realized....Until I BCed and had to own up to a lot of self-identity issues my hair (it's length and straightness when relaxed) had kept me from dealing with.

Now I love it relaxed or natural...but I'm saddened it took cutting it all off for me to get to that point. I suppose that makes it worth it though.

Plus...Megatek. LOL!


----------



## Menina Preta (Oct 28, 2008)

...My hair seems to grow super slow and it's saddening me. 

...I can't take good precise comparison pics.  I may need to make a growth measurement teeshirt or something...


----------



## delitefulmane (Oct 28, 2008)

I confess:
- My hair is growing soooo slow or wait am I just impatient? 
-Once my hair gets the length I want I might relax it againerplexed


----------



## PhiLee (Oct 28, 2008)

I snuck 2 bottles of expensive conditioner in with the grocery bill last week. Hubby didn't know!


----------



## *fabulosity* (Oct 28, 2008)

These are my confessions:

I wish when I had waist length hair... I gave a damn. Now I gotta go around and front to folks like "it's just hair" (when they ask me what happened)...knowing I'm trying daily and nightly to get anything that will speed up my hair growth.

I wish I had never let the careless stylist give me straight bleach highlights over a relaxer two weeks later.

That I will go to another stylist other than my regular for an ends trim bc my regular seems scissor happy..and tell my regular.. "my cousin did it"

That for the short time I was transitioning I really missed my relaxed hair..and when I relaxed two weeks ago..it was orgasmic..

That I'm never ever ever ever ever ever getting highlights or color again after these grow out.. I'mma be black beauty for real.

That I wonder about the texture of my future children's hair... (that's a really bad one) and I let my colorstruck family get to me when they say..."such and such (my fiancee) doesn't have hair good as ours..we gonna pray for your babies"...however self hating and politically incorrect that is..


----------



## TRINITY05 (Oct 28, 2008)

It takes me 2 hrs to twist my hair. I wish it didn't take so long. My hair has grown a little since my BC, but I would like for it to grow a little faster. 
I am addicted to wearing wigs at work. I want to find a nice natural hair style I can wear to work so I can burn my wigs. 

I only wear my twistouts on the weekends and my husband absolutely loves them. Sometimes my twistouts don't turn out like they should and I would like to find another regimen for my thick 4b hair. 

I'm tired of using Dove all the time, I want to try other soaps but I can't because I have sensitive skin and they break me out. 

I wish I could find a nice everyday eyeshadow that would define my eyes and make me feel pretty. 

When I was single I would get my nails done every two weeks. I stopped and I think I did because I was only doing it to impress other people (men I was dating). I am happy with not getting my nails done, but sometimes I look at my hands and feel like I should be getting them done just because.


----------



## Extremus (Oct 28, 2008)

KEWLKAT103 said:


> *-It really bothers me to walk in a room full of AA women and be the only one wearing my own hair on my head.*
> 
> *-When someone on here complains that people think all AA women with long hair is fake, I understand why.*



Thank you so much for this! 

My confessions are:

* Every since I self-relaxed, I really started to fall in love w/ my hair  Probably b/c it's a half inch to an inch away from BSL. 

I know I'll get stoned for these 2 comments, but here goes 

* Stop acting brand new when it comes to these hair comments (from white or black people)! "Is that your real hair?"  "Black women wear weaves" "Black women can't have long hair" Of course, this doesn't apply to ALL of us, but let's not act like this hasn't been the majority of our experience as well. I don't blame them for the opinion, when that's probably what they see/hear on the regular.

which brings me to

* I don't blame men for weave-checking  I don't even find it rude if a guy asks if that's your real hair. If it was the norm for men to be stuffing their pants with socks, I would damn sho' like to know and ask (probably) upfront if his sh!t was real too.


----------



## *fabulosity* (Oct 28, 2008)

^^^


----------



## ChocalateDiva (Oct 28, 2008)

E_Williams20 said:


> Thank you so much for this!
> 
> My confessions are:
> 
> ...


 

Real talk.!!!!!!


----------



## ItsyBitsy (Oct 28, 2008)

E_Williams20 said:


> Thank you so much for this!
> 
> My confessions are:
> 
> ...


 
There it is...........


----------



## LivingDoll (Oct 28, 2008)

I would like to transition one day.

I am afraid of what my natural hair will look like.

I feel sassier with short hair...I think it looks better on me.

I feel sexier with longer hair...I think I feel better with it.

I am addicted to bunning. I cannot imagine wearing my hair down YET.

Bunning has made me soooo lazy. I never feel like doing my hair anymore.

Now that my regimen is solid, I don't visit the Hair Discussion forum as much. I feel guilty.


----------



## sexyeyes3616 (Oct 28, 2008)

daephae said:


> I would like to transition one day.
> 
> *I am afraid of what my natural hair will look like.*
> 
> ...


 
*Same here*


----------



## HollyGolightly1982 (Oct 28, 2008)

My goal is to not buy anymore conditioner until I finish with all the conditioner I have at home. It's getting kinda hard. I feel like a crackhead.


----------



## cutenaynay (Oct 28, 2008)

honestly im tired of this six mos stretch  and thinking about going natural. I feel like just perming it and not waiting until next year to figure it out.


----------



## locabouthair (Oct 28, 2008)

I really want to be a do it yourself. I think my current stylist is giving me a setback. If things dont work out with this one I'm gonna start self relaxing. I know a lot about hair but I'm not good with styling at all.

The main reason I started taking my supplements and eating better was because I knew I was messing up my hair with my junk food habits. Yes I'm vain.


----------



## Mama Cita (Oct 28, 2008)

I have a few, lets see where to start, 

1. I went natural for the first time accidentally (High School-first duty station), then I was foolish and relaxed even though I had no real idea how to take care of my relaxed hair. I then accidentally transitioned because I was pregnant and after I had my son getting a relaxer was the last thing on my mind.  I said I would never get another relaxer.  Then I deployed, went completely natural and a few months after I returned..... I relaxed again (even though I requested a texlax) and I thought that wrapping it up every night gave me liberty to do whatever I wanted to do with it during the day so I basically fried it.  I got deployed again and cut off the relaxed hair which was APL to a TWA.  I vowed then never to get another relaxer and so far so good.

2.  From my join date to now I should at least be at BSL-MBL.  But I am not because while I have been taking my hair care seriously I have been too busy trying to keep up with the latest hair styles and colors and have been hindering my growth/retention.  I put my foot down and wrote out a plan for November 08 to December 2009 for my hair and I have every intention on sticking to it.  If I am diligent the way I hope I will be then I have no doubt that I will be BSL-MBL by this time next year, MBL-WSL the next and so on and so forth.

3.  I cant remember who said it but when I reach my goal Imma be throwing my s**t around and telling you it's potpouri...lol  No one on this earth will be able to tell me NOTHING!!!!  I will be the happiest and feel like the sexiest woman God ever created.  I absolutely LOVE my hair texture/curl pattern etc.. but I just need/want LENGTH!  I'm definately not going to be mean or snooty about it in any way shape or form but inside I'll know how I'm feeling.

4 Last one I promise-  I cant wait to reach my goal length so when people ask me what I'm mixed with I can yell at them I'm AFRO-AMERICAN, I'M BLACK!!!...People always assume I am mixed because my skin color, hair texture and eye color and features in general; and I am, but I hate when people assume, like the Black side of me couldn't be the contributing factor to how I look...I dont know maybe I am over reacting but it does get old to me...


----------



## Muffinz05 (Oct 28, 2008)

I love being natural but I don't like the shrinkage. Also, I'm 3c/4a combo and sometimes I wish I was 3c all over.


----------



## morehairplease (Oct 28, 2008)

Right now, I am having a battle w/myself deciding on what to do with my hair. I texturized my natural hair on Oct. 7 and also got a much needed trim. However, I hate the results of my texturizer. It is both under and over processed. While my curls are much looser and it is extremely easily to detangle(actually a joy....never thought I would say that) I have the desire to relax bone straight. I am attempting a 3 month stretch and wonder if I should relax bone straight or get braids to stretch for another 3 months(bringing my stretch to 6 months and then relaxing bone straight). I am hesistant to get braids b/c my hairline is really fragile but do feel that the lady who is going to braid it will do a great job and do them exactly how I want them. My hair is knotting up on some strands and my fear is that it will worsen while in braids. 

What should I do ladies? Any/all advice is greatly welcomed and much appreciated.


----------



## Prelude to a Kiss (Oct 28, 2008)

* I want healthy hair but hate doing it. I won't let anyone except (maybe) my mami touch it.

* I don't trust anyone to dust or trim my hair. The first time I let someone besides my mami do my hair, they cut my WSL hair to SL to accomodate a hairstyle!  It took forever to grow back.

* I need to do something about all of the conditioners in my closet/ bathroom; there's no room for my DH's everyday necessities. 

* I would love to go natural... but I can't stand my new growth in between stretches. 

* I'm growing out my hair for two reasons: to please both myself and my DH. He loved it when my hair was about APL in HS; I loved never having to do much besides rollerset, moisturize, and put it up!

* When I reach my goal length... I want even walk anymore. I'll be levitating out sheer happiness!


----------



## Browndilocks (Oct 28, 2008)

This is the longest my hair has been since childhood and I actually look way better with very long hair.  The fact that I'm natural makes my pressed hair look sexy.  I dont want to cut or color my hair ever again.

Now to relax again, well......


----------



## BostonMaria (Oct 28, 2008)

kblc06 said:


> -And I totally agree with SOANXIOUS; I'm working on losing weight now. When I get back to my old measurements (34D/32DD-24-36) with TBL hair, I'll throw my sh%t in your face and tell you its potpourri



I just lost 5 pounds. Mind you I cheated, I'm using diet pills LOL But I figure if I keep this up and lose 20 more pounds..AND have long natural hair... I might as well blow up because my head will swell up like a balloon


----------



## CenteredGirl (Oct 28, 2008)

I don't like kinky curl pattern, I prefer wavy.  My regimen is all about accentuating the wave pattern.


----------



## diamond42377 (Oct 28, 2008)

-I have no regrets on relaxing even though my mother was against it (started when I was 18). My natural hair is way too thick and wavy.

-I wish my hair was as glossy as many of the users on this board.

-I don't regret it when I cut my hair.

-I hate the humidity here and wish I lived somewhere else for my hair's sake lol


----------



## STLCoverGirl (Oct 28, 2008)

Long hair makes me feel sexy, no matter what I am wearing.

I hate doing other people's hair.

I love giving advice about hair.

I have no regimine.  I use different products all the time, I do nothing on schedule.

I never do protective styling.

I haven't washed my hair in 4 weeks and my hair looks fabulous right now.

I just trimmed an inch off my hair because I was bored.

My hair looks very healthy, but I always have split ends...no matter what I do.


----------



## glamazon386 (Oct 28, 2008)

E_Williams20 said:


> Thank you so much for this!
> 
> My confessions are:
> 
> ...



To the bolded - THANK YOU!


----------



## Ediese (Oct 28, 2008)

STLCoverGirl said:


> Long hair makes me feel sexy, no matter what I am wearing.
> 
> I hate doing other people's hair.
> 
> ...


 
Your hair is gorgeous! Can't wait to get to that length.


----------



## IrisDaVirus (Oct 28, 2008)

I'm amazed at how much my hair has grown out since I cut it at the end of last year. 

If I had a good set of clippers at home at the time, I would've shaved my head during my postpartum hair loss period. 

It's been nearly two years since I had braid extensions and I don't miss them one bit. 

I've grown to dislike any hands in my hair besides my own.  The only exceptions are my husband and my 15 month old DD.  

I think a lot of good moisturizers are being ruined with the addition of mineral oil.

If I go more than three days between conditioner washes, my hair is really hard to detangle.  

Conditioner washing my hair is a form of relaxation for me.

My hair shrinks like crazy when it dries - and I actually like it.

I could care less about the length of my hair.  The health of my hair and how well I take care of it are what's important to me.  

I often wear scarves because I don't feel the need to my hair to show off to other people.  

As my hair gets bigger, it's become more of a fun challenge to find hair accessories to hold it all in.

The best orgasm I've ever had happened the first time I used the Paul Mitchell Tea Tree Special Shampoo. Talk about great relief for an itchy scalp. :crazy:

I absolutely love, love, LOVE my natural hair.


----------



## KEWLKAT103 (Oct 28, 2008)

E_Williams20 said:


> Thank you so much for this!
> 
> My confessions are:
> 
> * I don't blame men for weave-checking  I don't even find it rude if a guy asks if that's your real hair. If it was the norm for men to be stuffing their pants with socks, I would damn sho' like to know and ask (probably) upfront if his sh!t was real too.


 
*Yes, yes and yes. *
*I would weave check too. It's their prerogative if they don't want to deal with fake hair.*


----------



## miss Congeniality (Oct 28, 2008)

I am slightly jealous of my friend that has BSL hair. She hasn't done anything to her hair and it grows.

I am annoyed that a 'friend' went natural right after I did. Ms. Metoo.


----------



## jahzyira (Oct 28, 2008)

I messed my hair up in the worst way
_i used pink no-lye which left me over and under processed_

I regret relaxing my hair before i found the hair boards
_if i had of waited i would of learned the proper way to relax my hair evenly_

Ive done a corrective relaxer on my hair 3 times
_and i plan on doin another one come my next touch-upand i dont think ill stop till it gets bone straight _

I confess i wanna switch to lye so bad!!!
_ive seen and heard too many raves about how much moisture your hair retains when you use lye im so tired of using fittyleven conditioners jus to maintain some healthy hair bling_

Im obsessed with hair and i suffer from a serious case of hand in hair disease!
_i just cant help it i gotta constantly touch my hair sometimes i spend hours in the bathroom swingin and staring at my hair and its even worser when i get past 2 months post ill rake through my new growth and check my progress every chance i get running my fingers across my "scalp coilies" as i call them lol_

Im trying my best to stick out this looooooooooong stretch
_its only been 14 weeks lol and im such a newbie when it comes to longterm stretching my original goal was 5 months by december (inspired by so many 6 month stretchers) but with my hand in hair anxiety and 5-6 inches of uderprocessed hair in the back plus almost 2 inches of newgrowth taking over i may relax this week im praying my order of aubrey organics hsr comes in to save the day to the point that ill be able to go another month_

Ive come to terms with protective styling
_until i found the hair boards i didnt know that i was in a 7 year hide your hair challenge lol but ever since i relaxed ive been a bad gurl with keeping up with the retention of my ends i know and understand that the only reason my ends appear to be thick now is because of the constant trimming of progress ive maintained bsl for years and im so ready to be longer but i know that the only way to get there is by my evil stepsister... the wetbun!!!( i cant help it i have a wierd face and my hair pulled back looks so funny) but ever since i bunned more ive noticed that i may not have to trim this touchup... _

Im so nervous about being here......
_i guess it stems from being such a loner when i was in school for some reason i jus wanted to come here and make so many hair friends but im so scared i dont know why im very shy and if someone has complimented me and i havent said anything back i apologize sometimes i have a burning question but i be scared to create a post thinking that no one will ever reply i know its jus me thinking and assuming but i mus say watch out when i get my digicam a picture will be worth a thousand words _

needless to say ive gotten everything off my chest


----------



## AllAboutTheHair (Oct 28, 2008)

I confess:

I don't trust hairstylists, beauticians, hair maintenance technicians, etc. whatever they want to call themselves.   

I would rather take the chance and do it myself, blame myself if I mess it up and deal with the consequences, and not pay anyone else to mess up my hair. 

I thank God for this board, especially the self relaxers support thread.  It has helped me with relaxer independence.

My regimen is in the tweaking phase.  I shampoo, deep condition, moisturize, and oil with different products every week.

I am still a product junkie.

I still make my own oil and butter concoctions.

I am a member of several hair boards, but this is my favorite.


----------



## chebaby (Oct 28, 2008)

even though  people tell me my hair is long and is growing, im afraid my hair will never get the legnth i want.
i hate it when people tell me my hair will fall out just because i co wash with different conditioners.


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## locabouthair (Oct 28, 2008)

chebaby said:


> even though  people tell me my hair is long and is growing, im afraid my hair will never get the legnth i want.
> *i hate it when people tell me my hair will fall out just because i co wash with different conditioners.*



girl ignore them. if your hair is growing, you must be doing right


----------



## justsimply (Oct 28, 2008)

jahzyira,

Your "before/after" pic in your siggy is awesome.  The drastic change in how healthy it looks ALMOST had me overlooking everything you said in the post .... beautiful hair.


----------



## BostonMaria (Oct 28, 2008)

I'm so obsessed with hair that last night I had a dream that I was buying hair products. No matter how many times I'd wake up I'd go back to that damn dream. 

I hate relaxers on my hair so much sometimes I'll wake up almost crying because I'll have a dream that somebody slapped a relaxer on my hair LMAO my fear is so big that if I do go to a salon I won't let them put a deep conditioner on me LOL I'm afraid they'll lace it with a relaxer.


----------



## kblc06 (Oct 28, 2008)

BostonMaria said:


> I'm so obsessed with hair that last night I had a dream that I was buying hair products. No matter how many times I'd wake up I'd go back to that damn dream.
> 
> * I hate relaxers on my hair so much sometimes I'll wake up almost crying because I'll have a dream that somebody slapped a relaxer on my hair LMAO my fear is so big that if I do go to a salon I won't let them put a deep conditioner on me LOL I'm afraid they'll lace it with a relaxer.*



Oh Gawd I've had this dream too many times to count. It always ends up with me knocking the hell out of whoever permed my hair ; I even tried to stab a woman with a relaxer brush


----------



## Ballerina_Bun (Oct 28, 2008)

when MNT came out with their new Clarifying shampoo and replenshing conditioner, I didn't tell anyone on the board.  I went to the only place in town at home that was carrying it and purchased almost every single bottle each time I went.

It was helping me when I was at a weird spot in my transitioning, which is no longer.


----------



## shmmr (Oct 28, 2008)

I REALLY wish I could meet Niko's cousin, but am afraid that if I did I would get snubbed cause my hair is usually a mess. Good hair days are few and far between. 

I spend too much time on this board, I love it here. I wish I'd found this board years ago. 

even though I love it here, I wish I could have more insightful/helpful things to say and I wish people would respond to my posts.


----------



## BostonMaria (Oct 28, 2008)

kblc06 said:


> Oh Gawd I've had this dream too many times to count. It always ends up with me knocking the hell out of whoever permed my hair ; * I even tried to stab a woman with a relaxer brush *



OMG that's so funny!


----------



## ChocalateDiva (Oct 28, 2008)

shmmr said:


> I REALLY wish I could meet Niko's cousin, but am afraid that if I did I would get snubbed cause my hair is usually a mess. Good hair days are few and far between.
> 
> I spend too much time on this board, I love it here. I wish I'd found this board years ago.
> 
> even though I love it here, I wish I could have more insightful/helpful things to say and *I wish people would respond to my posts*.


 
Aww.......its alright. Go ahead and make a post now. WE WILL ALL RESPOND TO IT!!! 

Go on now- get to posting.


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## Extremus (Oct 28, 2008)

Lineth said:


> * I don't trust anyone to dust or trim my hair. The first time I let someone besides my mami do my hair, they cut my WSL hair to SL to accomodate a hairstyle!  It took forever to grow back.



OMG! See this is why I'm becoming a DIYer. I know the longer my hair gets, and the shorter my stylist hair becomes (from breakage), the more scissor happy she'll become.


----------



## locabouthair (Oct 28, 2008)

shmmr said:


> *I REALLY wish I could meet Niko's cousin, but am afraid that if I did I would get snubbed cause my hair is usually a mess. Good hair days are few and far between. *
> 
> I spend too much time on this board, I love it here. I wish I'd found this board years ago.
> 
> even though I love it here, I wish I could have more insightful/helpful things to say and I wish people would respond to my posts.



I'm the same way. I see girls in the street and I'm like are they on the board, but I dont ask cuz my hair's not healthy yet.


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## Mahalialee4 (Oct 28, 2008)

Irresistible said:


> lately I have been thinking about getting a relaxer
> 
> my hair is such a JOB! ugh
> 
> but I probably wont, I mean I cant see it, I mean I think not, I mean nah I'm pretty sure I wont................



But You Will.


----------



## RosesBlack (Oct 28, 2008)

I am kind of frustrated today. I had my edges SO nice and laid down for weeks and now I can't do it again and can't figure out what I did.

WTH man?

Frustration sucks.


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## Menina Preta (Oct 28, 2008)

locabouthair said:


> I'm the same way. I see girls in the street and I'm like are they on the board, but I dont ask cuz my hair's not healthy yet.



LOL.  I saw a member on the train the other day (or the girl looks pretty damn close to being a member) and I was def. glad that I don't show my face on here, b/c I was looking hurt...(stressful week, 14 weeks post, packed schedule...bah).  The member looked great though!


----------



## LadyPaniolo (Oct 28, 2008)

I confess: I'm still so frustrated over the unstretched trim that cost me about 3 inches on my first nappiversary. If I had that hair still I'd be at least BSL.

I confess that I can't keep a style. I put in a weave, then take it out sometimes that same week. I just finished my braids last week, and I'm itching to take them down so I can rock a sew-in!

I have no clue how to style my natural hair. I never styled my hair when it was relaxed, either. 

I confess that I don't think 90% of the growth aids people on here use work at all. I know biotin does, it's helped me. But I seriously wonder about the coochie cream, etc.


----------



## africa (Oct 28, 2008)

I think I look better with extensions in my hair and I wish I felt prettier wearing my own hair.

I feel strange when my hair is out and I wear it down.  I always feel like I am hurting it and it needs to be protected

I want to transition to natural hair but 1) don't want to lose more hair again by having tangling and breakage at demarcation point 2) don't feel like I will have time to take care of it and look the way I want it to

When someone with long hair who obviously doesn't have nappy 4a/4b hair claims that hair type it makes me want to scream!  I think it does a disservice when people lie/stay ignorant about their hair type and try to give newbies advice.


----------



## balancegoals2009 (Oct 28, 2008)

I have been having a hard time going through this traintion to grown my hair medium or and thick . 
I hate wearing a bun eveyday of the week. 
I dont know how to style my hair because it so fine and thin. 
I missed wearing braids and extension , I find I am more attractive with them.


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## voyagetome (Oct 28, 2008)

shmmr said:


> I REALLY wish I could meet Niko's cousin, but am afraid that if I did I would get snubbed cause my hair is usually a mess. Good hair days are few and far between.
> 
> I spend too much time on this board, I love it here. I wish I'd found this board years ago.
> 
> even though I love it here, _*I wish I could have more insightful/helpful things to say and I wish people would respond to my posts*_.




Me TOO!! Haha I'm trying to work on it though . 

I want to dye my hair brown, pink, purple, etc. but i'm scared that if i do I will lose all of the progress I have made during my transition.

I also want to wait at least another year to BC. Not because of the length but because if I don't have clear skin by the time I BC I will feel like an ugly mess.

I treat my ends like crap because I figure i'm just going to cut them off anyway. erplexed


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## locabouthair (Oct 28, 2008)

africa said:


> I think I look better with extensions in my hair and I wish I felt prettier wearing my own hair.
> 
> I feel strange when my hair is out and I wear it down.  I always feel like I am hurting it and it needs to be protected
> 
> ...



That kinda irks me too. When I first got to the site, I was so happy to see members with 4b hair but then I noticed A LOT of people claim type 4 but to me, they are obviously type 3.  I dont saying anything cuz who am I to tell you what your hair type is unless you ask


----------



## locabouthair (Oct 28, 2008)

belletifi08 said:


> LOL.  I saw a member on the train the other day (or the girl looks pretty damn close to being a member) and I was def. glad that I don't show my face on here, b/c I was looking hurt...(stressful week, 14 weeks post, packed schedule...bah).  The member looked great though!



I ran into a member here like a month ago, and she was standing RIGHT next to me like 5 inches away but I didnt say anything.

When people tell me my hair looks dry and dull it makes me feel like the person is trying to say Im unkempt or I dont take care of myself or something. I take it really personally for some reason

My friend keeps telling me to get a weave but I dont feel pretty/attractive with fake hair at all but I dont want to insult her, not that she looks bad with it but I just dont like weaves.

I was having a bad hair day and I saw a friend of mine in the streets and instead of saying hi, I turned around and kept it moving. 

I catch people staring at my hair, and I wanna be like wth are you looking at, mind ya bizness


----------



## Menina Preta (Oct 28, 2008)

locabouthair said:


> That kinda irks me too. When I first got to the site, I was so happy to see members with 4b hair but then I noticed A LOT of people claim type 4 but to me, they are obviously type 3.  I dont saying anything cuz who am I to tell you what your hair type is unless you ask



I agree...

Another hair confession...If a member reaches mid back length or waistlength, I immediately look in her siggy to see her hair type.  If it's 4a/4b, I am super impressed...3a/3b...not so much, lol.


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## chebaby (Oct 28, 2008)

sigh.....im really upst that i can no longer wet bun. i have  an ear infection from doing so now that itss cold here. so tomorrow i will wake  up early and go to the dominican salon and get my roots only blown out. im going to take my UAN's crema plus with me.


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## locabouthair (Oct 28, 2008)

belletifi08 said:


> I agree...
> 
> Another hair confession...If a member reaches mid back length or waistlength, I immediately look in her siggy to see her hair type.  If it's 4a/4b, I am super impressed...3a/3b...not so much, lol.



Yeah, type 3 doesnt really impress me much. I'm happy that the person reached their goal, but I rarely go into an album or progress thread if the person is a type 3. I feel kinda bad for admitting that


----------



## Keedah (Oct 29, 2008)

locabouthair said:


> That kinda irks me too. When I first got to the site, I was so happy to see members with 4b hair but then I noticed A LOT of people claim type 4 but to me, they are obviously type 3.  I dont saying anything cuz who am I to tell you what your hair type is unless you ask



See thats how I got confused at first. Id look at someone's head and know if they are a 4a then I must be a 4b cause my hair didnt look like theirs. I now realize Im a true 4a.


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## gdivant (Oct 29, 2008)

I cannot keep my hands outta my hair.  I like to touch it, check the new growth.  See if its any better than 5 mins ago when I touched.  I do it absentmindedly.  I actually think I made one area sore from touching it so much.

I like when my bf plays in my hair too.

I used to twirl my ends - into knots!   But I've stopped that practice.

As a newbie I feel like I'm always doing my hair co-washing (almost daily b/c of exercising), moisturizing, sealing but my hair never _looks_ done.  I know it will pay off in the long run and I enjoy taking care of my hair, but.... I'd love to swang it every now and then.  (I don't have anything to swang yet).  I'm already getting tired of my phony pony bun.


----------



## sylver2 (Oct 29, 2008)

africa said:


> I think I look better with extensions in my hair and I wish I felt prettier wearing my own hair.
> 
> I feel strange when my hair is out and I wear it down.  I always feel like I am hurting it and it needs to be protected
> 
> ...



ITA!!i see tht a lot. people tried to argue me down about my type just cause i can stretch.  i kno my type..lol


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## crazydaze911 (Oct 29, 2008)

gdivant said:


> I cannot keep my hands outta my hair.  I like to touch it, check the new growth.  See if its any better than 5 mins ago when I touched.  I do it absentmindedly.  I actually think I made one area sore from touching it so much.
> 
> I like when my bf plays in my hair too.
> 
> ...



I've been fighting that hair twirling issue since 2nd grade. its sooooooo hard!  Bunnin helps but when a hair comes out of the bun - OMG - its over - lol

and i also agree with you on the 'my hairs never done' thing.  i feel like its so messy (mostly due to being loosely tied to avoid breakage) and also b/c im transitioning and am trying not to go totally CRAZY with the gel and such.  i dont feel pretty and feel like pple see me and think i dont care about my hairs appearance or even spend time on it - WHEN I MOST CERTAINLY DO!


----------



## chebaby (Oct 29, 2008)

those dominicans sure can do some hair.
they better learn how to keep that hot ash blow dryer off my scalp. im sore yall.


----------



## claudia05 (Oct 29, 2008)

-I'm not transitioning because I think I would look better with natural hair but because I think it would be better for my overall scalp and hair health. 

-I don't know if I'll like being natural but I _do _know I don't like my fine relaxed hair and don't see the point of texlaxing...

-I've been relaxed about 81% of my life, since 4yrs old...


----------



## Evolving78 (Oct 29, 2008)

everytime i get on a hair board, all of a sudden i want to wash my hair, or put some type of moisturzier in it.


----------



## nappystorm (Oct 29, 2008)

I like my hair best when it's CBL and relaxed but I'm narcisistic (sp) so I keep it natural and long so I can get lots of attention and compliments


----------



## ladylibra (Oct 29, 2008)

i really do love my natural hair  but for the past 2.5 weeks i've been wearing it "straightened" (rollerset).  i don't feel the urge to "show off" my hair when straightened though.  none of that flipping, tossing and swanging that y'all talk about so often here.  but when i wear my natural hair out... especially on a good hair day... watch out now!!! 

i feel kinda guilty that i spend soooooo much time on my hair, and keep my son's hair short.  yes, his hair is kinkier than mine... has super-shrinkage (90%) and takes more TLC/moisturizing.  and i don't put forth the effort simply because he's a boy.  well... i still wash the little bit of hair he has on his head... and at least i am the one using the clippers on his head every other week... that counts for something right?  honestly, if he were a GIRL i might've thrown in the towel on growing out my hair, in order to spend that extra time and effort on HERS.  or, i might've caved and texturized her hair... 

in any case, i dunno if i even want to grow it past BSL now.  we'll see how i feel when i reach full BSL (in layers right now), but really, the work is outweighing the desire for length.  i'm not into wearing my hair in protective styles, if i can't deal with it when it's out and tangling all the time then i just don't wanna grow it any longer. 

i'm tired of looking at other women with hawt short styles... i am itching to chop soooooooo bad lately... 

i hate hair typing period


----------



## aurora3140 (Oct 29, 2008)

shortdub78 said:


> everytime i get on a hair board, all of a sudden i want to wash my hair, or put some type of moisturzier in it.



I know!  My hair can be tied in my bonnet with my baggy underneath, but as soon as I hop on these forums, I feel my hands start to feel twitchy.  Before I know it, my hair's free and I'm massaging my scalp !


----------



## Avyn (Oct 29, 2008)

I only went natural so I could color my hair without the extensive damage and double processing. 

I would not have stayed natural if most of my hair was not 3c/4a.

10% of my hair is 3A/B and I wish that all of my hair was that way, esp. the 4z parts that seemed to just gather round at my front edges!  

I'm annoyed by the way my ends curl up but my roots frizz up. 

I'm hiding my hair with a wig until June 09, the date of my last relaxer in 07, and I plan to swang my hair for all the naysayers who talked about my "hair" choice.  i cant get to that rocker chick smiley thats swingin her hair...but thats what im gon do.


----------



## RosesBlack (Oct 29, 2008)

I can't stop petting my hair today. I got over the dryness of last week and it just feels silky and delicious. I'm at work but I want to take down my bun and play with my silky tasty NG.


----------



## Keedah (Oct 29, 2008)

I wish my hair was just a little less thick. Even though its shoulder length I can barely put it in a ponytail unless its blow dried straight!


----------



## LunadeMiel (Oct 29, 2008)

BostonMaria said:


> I'm so obsessed with hair that last night I had a dream that I was buying hair products. No matter how many times I'd wake up I'd go back to that damn dream.
> 
> *I hate relaxers on my hair so much sometimes I'll wake up almost crying because I'll have a dream that somebody slapped a relaxer on my hair LMAO my fear is so big that if I do go to a salon I won't let them put a deep conditioner on me LOL I'm afraid they'll lace it with a relaxer*.


 
Wow...I'm not the only one. My mom once used one of my combs to smooth my sis' relaxer. Tell me why I soaked that comb and washed it like 20 times before using it...


----------



## nicey (Oct 29, 2008)

glamazon386 said:


> I am very low maintenance when it comes to everything. Hair, nails, makeup, etc. People seem to think the opposite but I'm not. Just because those things are kept up 99% of the time it doesn't mean I put hours into that maintenance.


 

Me too.


----------



## sexyeyes3616 (Oct 29, 2008)

I have a hard time trimming my ends because I don't like see to my length go.


----------



## chebaby (Oct 29, 2008)

i wish my hair were thicker, much thicker. i really could handle it.

i cant wait to get home so i can moisturize and seal my hair. im loving nourish and shine sealed with cocasta right now.

thinking of getting a color shower in red/copper...leaning more towards a browm more than a red so i wont get the mean look at work. but i have to do more research because right now i dont know if a color shower is more of a dye or rinse.


----------



## chebaby (Oct 29, 2008)

people keep telling me i dont need make up but im loving wearing a full face right now. i think i look damn good, all those videos on youtube finally paid off lol. mac has my perfect shade, much more fitting than make up forever HD foundation. i can acheive that perfect dewy face i love.

i confess makeup may be taking over my hair obsession.


----------



## chebaby (Oct 29, 2008)

sexyeyes3616 said:


> I have a hard time trimming my ends because I don't like see to my length go.


 i have decided no more dustings(i never trim) for me until march, if then.


----------



## Magus484 (Oct 30, 2008)

I am almost waistlength (stretched natural) however I am not doing anything with my hair but pulling it back into a bun. 

I am afraid, or hesistant, to wear my hair out because I am concerned that it might lose control and become a big bush.

I want long hair and all, but I am not doing anything special with the hair I already have.

I am too lazy to be stylish with my hair.  Trying to get motivation to change all this currently.


----------



## butterfly3582 (Oct 30, 2008)

kels823 said:


> There is a very small part of me, waaaaay in the back of my head that doesn't think my hair will grow. It's because it never has before; this is truly the longest my hair has ever been. So to think that it will get LONGER is just... unthinkable. erplexed


 
This is me 100% I honestly cant imagine having APL hair and sometimes think about cutting my hair because i don't want to feel like i fail when i don't reach APL.

The members on the board help to inspire me to keep going.


----------



## BostonMaria (Oct 30, 2008)

I have been reading LHCF locked threads the entire day. Some have been so hilarious that I accidentally laughed out loud at work


Oh and I feel very rachet. I stole 2 pairs of latex gloves at my doctor's office today cuz I need to henna tonight and I didn't have any gloves LMAO


----------



## malachi74 (Oct 30, 2008)

my deepest secret is wishing there was some way to make my forehead smaller...like can i get hairclub for men on about 2 inches of my forehead or maybe have a surgery that would pull my hairline down some???


----------



## sexyeyes3616 (Oct 30, 2008)

I haven't let a hairstylist trim my hair in over a year.


----------



## Duchesse (Oct 30, 2008)

If my hair isn't at least a healthy APL in a year I will definitely just cut it off and have a cute pixie cut. I've spent too much on time and money trying to grow my hair out, if I don't reap the benefits in 365 days, it's a wrap, party done.


----------



## Carrie A (Oct 30, 2008)

Ok... here goes.  I never really cared about the length or style of my hair. I'd abuse my hair, cut it short and it would grow right back - at least to APL.  I starting lurking here after reading about this site from another natural hair site, for additional tips on caring for natural hair.  Man I got sucked in.  After seeing all you ladies I got in my head that I could grow ultra long healthy natural hair.  Now I don't want to finish my big chop because I won't make the short gals APL challenge next year!  GRRRRR


----------



## sexyeyes3616 (Oct 30, 2008)

I think WL hair will be too long for me. I do my own trims, and I think sometimes I don't know what I'm doing.


----------



## msa (Oct 30, 2008)

BostonMaria said:


> *I have been reading LHCF locked threads the entire day. Some have been so hilarious that I accidentally laughed out loud at work *
> 
> 
> Oh and I feel very ghetto. I stole 2 pairs of latex gloves at my doctor's office today cuz I need to henna tonight and I didn't have any gloves LMAO





That's how I did my research when I first go to the board. I got to know everyone and all the drama. Now I always know what people are talking about when they refer to some past member or situation.

Those threads are hilarious.


----------



## BklynHeart (Oct 30, 2008)

Even though my natural hair is my 'God-given' hair, I'm glad I don't any different than when I had a relaxer. I was really nervous that my husband and friends would look at me as though I just came up from the underground railroad.


----------



## imstush (Oct 30, 2008)

I prefer straight hair to natural hair

And yes, I'm natural...but I'm too scared to relax because of what other people may say.


----------



## cutiebe2 (Oct 30, 2008)

If I actually took my vitamins like I was supposed to my hair would grow faster

I think jacked up hair was the best thing for me. Knowing that under my braids was a short mess gave me the push I need to do everything little thing possible to make my hair grow

Now I know my hair is just a CHI away from looking fly, so I condition and use MT..but after that I get lazy


----------



## CaramelPrincezz (Oct 30, 2008)

Don't foresee natural any where in my future. I like wearing my hair down and I want it to be light and flowy. Natural doesn't give that to me. One bit of humidity and my hair reverts like crazy. Even stretching is out of the question anymore. I can hardly part my hair after 10-12 weeks. 


Whenever I wear my hair down, I always seem to have to bump my ends in the morning so I end up using heat daily
I haven't had a real moisturizer in months....but my hair is still growing. Just bought some Kids Organics Moisturizer and Detangler

I can't do the protective styling all the time. I like wearing my hair out and I don't look right with ponytails.

I'm extremely lazy about moisturizing, sealing, DC....everything

I often lay on my cotton pillow without a bonnet or scarf

Thick hair is over rated


----------



## Napp (Oct 30, 2008)

i wish i had fine,silkier an a tad looser hair. then i would be straight. thick,coarse hair is not what it seems especially if you got a big head like me.

i hate my edges. they are a really tight 4a patter and dont define or anything with out some gel and even then its not much


----------



## Keedah (Oct 31, 2008)

I feel in general like the hoodrats try to holla at me more with straight hair and I get the more intellectual brothas with natural hair.


----------



## nurseN98 (Oct 31, 2008)

My confessions:
1. i wish ppl would realize that hair typing is a bit subjective, especially the 3's==>4's. And IMO it doesn't matter because i know 4b's that can detangle & style their hair waaaaaaaaaay quicker than i can.

2. i wish ppl would not think that just cause a person is 3c/4a..whatever...that life is grand and hair is automatically easy to deal with. 

3. i wish i could detangle my hair in 5 minutes


----------



## Filmatic (Oct 31, 2008)

I almost had a break down earlier this week and was inches from cutting all my hair off thanks to Feria's breakage. Luckily Aphogee brought it back.


----------



## *fabulosity* (Oct 31, 2008)

BklynHeart said:


> Even though my natural hair is my 'God-given' hair, I'm glad I don't any different than when I had a relaxer. I was really nervous that my husband and friends would look at me as though I *just came up from the underground railroad*.


----------



## *fabulosity* (Oct 31, 2008)

Keedah said:


> I feel in general like the hoodrats try to holla at me more with straight hair and I get the more intellectual brothas with natural hair.


 

These are some good ones..helping my insomnia!!


----------



## JerriBlank (Oct 31, 2008)

BostonMaria said:


> *I have been reading LHCF locked threads the entire day. Some have been so hilarious that I accidentally laughed out loud at work *
> 
> 
> Oh and I feel very ghetto. I stole 2 pairs of latex gloves at my doctor's office today cuz I need to henna tonight and I didn't have any gloves LMAO



These are the best
People are crazy thougherplexed


----------



## Lexib (Oct 31, 2008)

msa said:


> I like to wear Celie braids, not just under my wig, but out of the house with no wig. I won't do it if I'm going to church or work, but if I'm just going to the store or to work out or the mall I'll do it. I love it.


 


Oh lawd child! Celie - from the color purple...while over the age of 5 and in public??


----------



## Evolving78 (Oct 31, 2008)

sexyeyes3616 said:


> I think WL hair will be too long for me. I do my own trims, and I think sometimes I don't know what I'm doing.



i'm short.  i would look like Cousin It!LOL!  i think bsl would be ok for me.


----------



## BostonMaria (Oct 31, 2008)

ladybeesrch said:


> These are the best
> People are crazy thougherplexed



Today's locked thread about the mom's recipe was the best one. I was CRYING!


----------



## Mrs.Green (Oct 31, 2008)

BostonMaria said:


> Today's locked thread about the mom's recipe was the best one. I was CRYING!


 
Oh lord that thread got locked  Claude have mercy 


Off to see what happened


----------



## MA2010 (Oct 31, 2008)

So what exactly do you type in to see these infamous locked threads? I type in "locked thread" and I don't get much. What else can I type in? I just want to learn the ropes around these here parts!!! LOL!


----------



## sexyeyes3616 (Oct 31, 2008)

Manushka said:


> So what exactly do you type in to see these infamous locked threads? I type in "locked thread" and I don't get much. What else can I type in? I just want to learn the ropes around these here parts!!! LOL!


 
Search thread closed that yields results as well.


----------



## BostonMaria (Oct 31, 2008)

Manushka said:


> So what exactly do you type in to see these infamous locked threads? I type in "locked thread" and I don't get much. What else can I type in? I just want to learn the ropes around these here parts!!! LOL!


Well in the main page of the hair product review forum I sorted the view by most replies. Then I just went down the pages of locked threads. I did it this way because most locked threads are ones with many replies.


----------



## BklynHeart (Oct 31, 2008)

BostonMaria said:


> Today's locked thread about the mom's recipe was the best one. I was CRYING!


 
Chile, I almost fell out my chair!!


----------



## Amerie123 (Oct 31, 2008)

BostonMaria said:


> Today's locked thread about the mom's recipe was the best one. I was CRYING!


 

Man, wasn't it though!! .. I can sit here and name quite a few things that was funny about that thread, but i'm not. Which is why it's closed now.
....Okay, yall can get back to the confessions. LOL


----------



## PhiLee (Oct 31, 2008)

I can't find it...  I wanna read too.


----------



## Morenita (Oct 31, 2008)

Love this thread 



abordeaux said:


> If my hair wasn't fine and curly, I would never have gone natural.



Me too 

Also...

If my D3 was a man, we'd be having an affair...I'm addicted to it and I don't care that it pulls my hair out sometimes


----------



## hairsothick (Oct 31, 2008)

PhiLee said:


> I can't find it...  I wanna read too.



I think it's been "poofed" because it's not in the list of threads started by the OP and I can't find it either even though I posted in it, but it was quite entertaining.

I confess that I am being lazy right now and need to get up and put this deep conditioner on my hair.


----------



## chebaby (Oct 31, 2008)

i get sad sometimes that my hair is so thin. its all my fault. if i had never gotten my hair bleach it would still be thick but nope i just had to do it. it doesnt seem like its ever going to thicken up again.


----------



## PhiLee (Oct 31, 2008)

hairsothick said:


> I think it's been "poofed" because it's not in the list of threads started by the OP and I can't find it either even though I posted in it, but it was quite entertaining.
> 
> I confess that I am being lazy right now and need to get up and put this deep conditioner on my hair.


 
Jinx!  I am sitting here with a DT in too.


----------



## Avyn (Oct 31, 2008)

malachi74 said:


> my deepest secret is wishing there was some way to make my forehead smaller...like can i get hairclub for men on about 2 inches of my forehead or maybe have a surgery that would pull my hairline down some???


 
OMG!!!! Me too!!!  I have like the biggest 5head (not 4 head) ever!!!  When I was little one of my brother's friends used to talk about how he grew facial hair by shaving his face every day even though he didn't have hair, and hair grew in.  So you know I had to try shaving my head.  It didn't work.  So I wear bangs at all times, no matter what.


----------



## ya_ya (Nov 1, 2008)

I'm always an inch away from relaxing my hair.. and even closer to texlaxing it

I make my hair out to be such a chore but i really don't do much with it since im either too lazy or busy


----------



## JerriBlank (Nov 3, 2008)

BostonMaria said:


> Today's locked thread about the mom's recipe was the best one. I was CRYING!



*Giggles*
Me too.I was just looking from afar


back on topic:I just realized that i cannot moisturize my ends like i need to when i am in braids...This is huge for me,because i stay in braids,and it was like a light bulb was turned on when i realized this.

Now i dunno what to do

I don't want to bun,and my edges are a hot,fuzzy mess...How can i fix this?


----------



## RosesBlack (Nov 3, 2008)

Why did I use Motions spray leave in with my profectiv last night? That my hair does not like that. 

 So dry in spots today. *sigh* crap. Co wash tomorrow I guess to fix it.


----------



## Glib Gurl (Nov 3, 2008)

I really don't like my hair - it's really difficult to style and hardly ever looks the way I want it to look.  The best I can do is the big head of curls, which (1) makes my head look even bigger and (2) is somewhat damaging because I experience a good amount of breakage with my rollers erplexed


----------



## tsturnbu (Nov 3, 2008)

I Wish i didn't have to try so hard to straighten my hair.  sometimes i feel like i have the coarsest hair on the planet....but then i feel better when i get a fresh perm and my hair looks super thick ...

so, i guess my hair wish would be to have soft, manageable (without relaxers) hair that is thick AND dense.


----------



## prospurr4 (Nov 3, 2008)

I'm kinda rethinking my ultimate goal of full hipbone length.  Right now, I'm about an inch from WL, not even full WL yet, and my texlaxed hair is a lot of work; my detangling and rollersetting sessions are getting longer and longer.  But when I see someone with full, thick hipbone length hair, and how beautiful it is, I think it's worth the extra time and effort to maintain...Ho-hum...


----------



## NinasLongAmbition (Nov 3, 2008)

I hate how slow my hair grows, it kinda makes me feel embarrassed in front of the doubters. I get so manyy comments like " oh for how much you take care of your hair , it should be down your back" I started in Feb.08 at sl and here I am Oct.08 and still not APL.erplexed


----------



## gymfreak336 (Nov 3, 2008)

I relaxed again  

My "not holding a curl" problem is a little better but my hair still isn't %100. I am going to keep working on it though and hope for the best. It isn't breaking and I don't have any split ends so it isn't damaged. Maybe it is just PMSing or something


----------



## chebaby (Nov 3, 2008)

im afraid to use my color showers. i never used them before and i bought one in red copper and im afraid it may be too red rather than brown. i've had every color hair in the rainbow but now that i work where i do im not trying to look ghetto or unprofessional. i dont know what to do.


----------



## secretdiamond (Nov 3, 2008)

I'm not liking my hair at all anymore. I thought cutting the front this weekend would help, but I was satisfied for 1 day.  Today, I got the urge to cut it to shoulder length. 

But I haven't had short hair in so long, I'm afraid I'd freak out & hate myself if I cut it short.

*sigh* & I used to be a champion for short hair & making dramatic chops.


----------



## shmmr (Dec 4, 2008)

I relaxed on Nov 5 - and I LOVE IT! I never got compliments on my hair before, but now...whachoutna. 

This is the first time in my life that my hair looks good/decent on most days.

I asked to be texlaxed, had a consult, told the stylist I want texlax, reminded her that if the directions say 20 mins, then I only need 10 and still ended up with relaxer on for 20 mins and I barely have waves. So I'll be transitioning to texlaxed (doing it myself from now on)...

I'm nervous about self relaxing.

I've already posted in this thread before.
I'm so glad I found this site.


----------



## LunadeMiel (Dec 4, 2008)

I aboslutely love my hair. I can't wait to straighten at the end of this month...


----------



## Extremus (Dec 4, 2008)

If I'm not BSL by Dec 30, I'm truly going to believe in terminal length. It's just taking me too damn long to get there (8 months!)


----------



## Naturelle (Dec 4, 2008)

I wish my hair was more in the 3s than the 4s.  Nice thick bouncy spirals down my back


----------



## LaManda (Dec 4, 2008)

kels823 said:


> I overlapped my relaxer accidentally the other day. Now I'm scared I'll have breakage down the line. Might have to start having someone else do my touchups.
> 
> I really think that once I hit APL and beyond (and drop 25lbs), I'm gonna be one bad ****.
> 
> ...


 
OMG! I thought I was the only one....this chick I work with has beautiful hair, she's gets a relaxer every 4 weeks (sometimes 3 weeks) and wears it down EVERYDAY!!!


----------



## Southernbella. (Dec 4, 2008)

Naturelle said:


> I wish my hair was more in the 3s than the 4s. Nice thick bouncy spirals down my back


 
You can have this type 2/3 mess in the nape of my head.  I confess that I HATE this part of my hair. It just hangs there, it doesn't shrink up with the rest of my hair, and it makes me look like I have a mullet. I would cut it off but I wear my hair straight sometimes and that would look crazy.


----------



## cocoaluv (Dec 4, 2008)

I havent washed my hair in a week and a half and I feel so gross about that.

I am determined to go natural but I have NO styling ability. I just want to be relaxer free.

I know that when I do become natural I wont feel comfortable with my hair untill its as long as it is now.


I am too chicken to get a weave but I am setting up an appointment for one next week.  I may just chicken out again and get braids.


----------



## shortee (Dec 4, 2008)

I Hate my hair when its shot!!!!!!

But i just cut it in to a long bob, but i dont want to admit to myself that I should have never cut it.   so my avatar is a lie.

BUT on the other hand it will grow back.


----------



## lovinmylocs (Dec 4, 2008)

MichelleMyBelle said:


> I have agree with Que! I'm thinking about cutting my hair to a twa!
> 
> I use to love long hair...I wanted it so bad. Now that I have it I am having second thoughts!
> Be careful what you wish for! I am looking at all these cute hair styles on the board I use to rock when my hair was shorter...man I miss that.


 
Me too.

I wish I didn't transition for so long I did it for almost a year and now I look back and see all of the cute stuff I could have done but I was too afraid of doing.

I think I want to cut my hair off - really short. It is so much easier to maintain. 

All I thought I wanted was a big puff, and it's pretty big now, but now all I think I want is short hair.

I hate obsessing over my hair....shhhh I know that is blasphemy on this board. 

I wish my texture were curlier and not so dang frizzy...I love my hair don't get my wrong, but sometimes I wish I had pretty curls with bling that I didn't have to put 50-11 products on and fuss over every dang day.

Since I've been natural I've never worn a protective style. I know...I know

Sometimes I get tempted to relax my hair bone straight, but I don't have healthy relaxed hair. I just don't - this is the longest my hair has ever been in my entire life.


----------



## Lady Kay 21 (Dec 4, 2008)

* I go back and forth daily on weather or not I want to loc my hair

* my biggest motivation in growing out my hair is to shut the haters up who said it can't be done

* I think I'm a sexy *** chick no matter how I wear my hair

* I think with the right procucts, tlc and a patience natural hair can be managed easily


----------



## IntelligenceisBeautiful (Dec 4, 2008)

I'm not really liking my natural hair, I think the relaxed look suits me better


----------



## *5+5 (Dec 4, 2008)

I would kill for Beyonce's hair line.


----------



## anon123 (Dec 4, 2008)

I haven't visited this thread in a while.

It's raw in here. 

None of this: 

I love it.


----------



## onejamifan (Dec 4, 2008)

sylver2 said:


> right now i feel that i don't want to ever go natural....


 
^^^^^^^^^^
Even though I considered transitioning for one split second, I love the way my relaxed hair looks and have never had any major issues like scalp burns, bald patches, etc. (knock on wood) with relaxers over the past 21 years! I know relaxers are not for everyone, but they are definitely for me


----------



## Lucie (Dec 4, 2008)

I am jealous of anyone who can wrap hair well. I get stuck after I do the first part. I have given up trying due to my severe stupidity.
I hate my once beautiful temple and nape
I wish I was a 3B/3C
It took one year and 2 months for my bangs to get to my chin. Yet the rest of my hair is not that retarded


----------



## Naturelle (Dec 4, 2008)

lauren450 said:


> You can have this type 2/3 mess in the nape of my head.  I confess that I HATE this part of my hair. It just hangs there, it doesn't shrink up with the rest of my hair, and it makes me look like I have a mullet. I would cut it off but I wear my hair straight sometimes and that would look crazy.


 
Lauren (guess what my name is )  I would rock your hair (and boots ) in a hot second!  Your hair is FA-BU-LOUS!


----------



## BostonMaria (Dec 4, 2008)

Nobody should be this much into hair. Its beyond an obsession.  My hubby and I were in bed making out and he said "Stop twirling your hair!" LMAO  Instead of stopping I wanted to kick him in the gut.  

Me and my hair are gonna run away to some deserted place where Shea Butter roams LOL


----------



## DarkHair (Dec 4, 2008)

I used to hate washing my hair unless my stylist did it. 

I had a time vacuuming my bathroom floor today


----------



## Shana' (Dec 4, 2008)

I have no idea what I'm doing with my hair. I thought by upping my DC's per week, my hair would be in better shape. I was wrongerplexed. Im considering cutting it all off but I'm not sure.


----------



## chebaby (Dec 4, 2008)

im in love with my hair right now.
i cant stop planning weeks ahead about what shampoo im going to use, what deep conditiioner im going to use.
while im at work im constantly thinking about going home to moisturize, seal and wrap my hair.
yesterday a spanish lady told me as i was walking by "ooooohhh nice hair lady". boy did that make my day.

im debating getting some phyto stuff seeing as how its so expensive.
i have my staples but i just cant stop buying stuff.


----------



## spacetygrss (Dec 4, 2008)

I love my natural hair, but shrinkage gets on my nerves.


----------



## Ebony Majesty (Dec 4, 2008)

I finally love my hair


----------



## oooop2 (Dec 4, 2008)

I am actually tired of my hair and seriously contemplating paying my barber a visit once I am back in the USA this summer.  After wearing an effortless BC for 8yrs, these past 3yrs of growing my hair out has taken a toll.  I'm tired of fooling w/hair....If I were brave enough, I would BC myself


----------



## Evolving78 (Dec 4, 2008)

i think i'm not going to do the wig thing.  it just seems like too much trouble for me.  how i'm taking care of my hair right now is very easy.  no stress about it.  i wonder are people really being honest about what they are doing to their hair when they complain about breakage?


----------



## la flaca (Dec 4, 2008)

I don't care about my hair anymore


----------



## gissellr78 (Dec 4, 2008)

I wish i had straight hair so i wont have to go through all this process....yes i said it.


----------



## Nuelle (Dec 4, 2008)

It's been 2 weeks since I've gotten my hair done and I really don't want to wash it myself. I ran out of shampoo and conditioner and don't want to clog the shower drain again. Let's not even talk about the amount of time I'd have to spend detangling this 9-month post hair. ugh...I'm a bit worried that my hair has not reverted yet...I should lay off on the heat and I will...So, I guess I might have to wait till I go home in 2 weeks (Ewww... I know). Maybe this weekend...

I AM transitioning but I cannot fathom doing the BC anytime soon. I love my hair! It makes me feel sexy I don't mind the attention either. lol. But I really wan to go natural... decisions, decisions.


----------



## lovinmylocs (Dec 4, 2008)

BostonMaria said:


> Nobody should be this much into hair. Its beyond an obsession. My hubby and I were in bed making out and he said "Stop twirling your hair!" LMAO Instead of stopping I wanted to kick him in the gut.
> 
> Me and my hair are gonna run away to some deserted place where Shea Butter roams LOL


 
LOL you're crazy.


----------



## hairedity (Dec 4, 2008)

at times I really feel that my "nappy" hair (this is confession right...) is a curse!


----------



## dede1174 (Dec 4, 2008)

OK HERE GOES

(music notes) These are my confessions

I initially went natural only because I knew my hair was 3b/3a and fine. Though its been a great ride, I am secretly..... wanting a long weave. but I'm lazy because that would mean I have to come my hair every day.

I only want to do the 'natural thing " in the summer. I want hi-lites and dag gonenit i want them NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am a terminal PJ and I have had indian bazaar send boxes to my job so my DH wouldnt see how much I was getting.

I hang my head in shame now.

Bad DD


----------



## jeanne516 (Dec 5, 2008)

I only feel pretty when my hair is down and straight...otherwise, i just feel *blah*
The main reasons why I'm growing my hair is for: 
1. male attention, and 
2. to feel better about the way I look


----------



## BostonMaria (Dec 5, 2008)

I have a brand new bottle of Shescenti hair masque waiting for me in the bathroom. It took all my strength and will power not to wash my hair this morning. I can hear the bottle calling me from 16 miles away.. "Maria.. wash your herr... Mariahhhhh" (yes my bottle has a Southern accent in my dreams)


----------



## inthepink (Dec 5, 2008)

*I used to daydream about relaxing my hair and how easy it was.
*I am still waiting to get back to my length from when I was relaxed.
*I also wish I knew how to wrap my hair like a pro.
*My hair does better when I use heat and keep it straight.  Otherwise, I get knots and breakage. 
*Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have bangs.
*Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to have a cute bob.
*I am afraid to go to a stylist. I haven't seen one in over 2 years.  I've done everything myself since then and my hair is fine so why should I go?
*I am obsessed with hair.  When I see people on the street, sometimes I follow them just to stare at their hair.
*Sometimes I see people and just want to cut off their bad ends.
*I feel embarrassed when I see people with slicked down baby hair with nasty brown gel.


----------



## justsimply (Dec 5, 2008)

chebaby said:


> *im in love with my hair right now.*
> *i cant stop planning weeks ahead* about what shampoo im going to use, what deep conditiioner im going to use.
> while im at work im constantly thinking about going home to moisturize, seal and wrap my hair.
> yesterday a spanish lady told me as i was walking by "ooooohhh nice hair lady". boy did that make my day.
> ...


 
The bolded is soooo me.  I can't commit to locing because I love this stage...not so short that I'm limited to 1 hair style, but not so long that it's a pain in the but.  I'm already thinking about how I'm going to wear it to a Christmas party....


----------



## chebaby (Dec 5, 2008)

i've decided to go to my hair dresser (havent been since september) to get a press and curl. shes the only person i let do my hair besides myself and i love that when she dusts my hair she DUSTS my hair lol. no cutting.

i may cancel lol.


----------



## carib_n_curly (Dec 5, 2008)

***i want purple hair or blue no not highlight the whole thing

i don't understnad when people say 6 weeks ng is a battle to deal with i can understand 14 or 12 but not 6 is that little amount of growth that hard to detangle with 2 texture but i've never relaxed ever and had to deal with 2 texture  so i guess i will never understand so i will continue not to understand and try to

i want layers in fact i'm getting layers next year my hair grows naturally in layers. i love the shape it makes my hair when it's all fro-ed out

i also want to dye my hair honey brown, or chocolate brown, red , dark brown i'm so confused but i think i'm going to dye my hair a very light colour like honey brown and then use semi permanent colour so i can do all the colours of the rainbow and have it show up cause my hair is dark coloured  naturally and no semi permanent colour is showing up on my head.
*


----------



## Britt (Dec 5, 2008)

I'd love a head of 3b/c curls... or even just a head of all 3c hair.


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## Fhrizzball (Dec 5, 2008)

*wants to join in*

-takes a deep breath-

1. I wanna relax my hair just to transition proper like everyone else
2. I'm only natural because I'm too lazy for relaxers
3. It's automatically assumed that if you're natural you can do hair really well. I hate that
4. I follow girls just to see their hair and then i try to sit by girls with nice hair just for something stare at when I'm bored
5. when will all these split ends stop? I never noticed them when I was relaxed.
6. i wish I knew about texlaxing earlier but now I feel it's too late
7. I hate my bangs I hate my layers I hate my nape
8. Detangling depresses me so I only fingercomb
9.  why do I keep ending up with sucky hairstylists
10. I'm too traumatized to straighten my hair now even if the amount of heat damage is only noticeable to me

and that's only my top ten...


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## Incognitus (Jul 11, 2013)

Sometimes I get so lazy and sidetracked that an overnight DC turns into a 2 day DC.
I wish my hair was 3B.
I snap off SSKs instead of going to get scissors.
It has been several years since I've used a comb to detangle my hair.


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## RngdeCurls (Aug 6, 2013)

*exhales*

I've always wanted to be a heat-less natural but only got the courage up when it started to become more popular.

I want my hair to grow longer than my cousin's. Her hair has been longer than mine our whole lives.

I wish my S/O would touch my hair more. He has 3c curls and I play in his hair all the time but I feel like he's afraid of my kinkier texture. 

If my S/O and I have children,  I'd want them to have my 4a coils and not his 3c curls. I think 3c hair is gorgeous, but I have no experience dealing with it and in my family it comes with a superiority complex.

I'm thinking about sealing with Crisco because I read about it in an old thread.

I wish I had a gal-pal who was natural. When my girlfriends talk about $100 bundles, I feel left out.

Whew! This thread is gritty gritty!


----------



## Lilmama1011 (Aug 6, 2013)

I think i seriously have OCD about my hair.  Anything i do it revolves around my hair. I want to keeping  scarf on when washing dishes because hot water might frizz my hair, when i "color" im thinking about my hair being on something satin or silk like a pillow cover because scarves are not cute while  "coloring". I dont like the window down In the car because it blows my hair around. I examine all hairs that come out to make sure it's only shedded hair. Started to over trim because my back grew back almost fully and keep trying to even it out(i promised myself i will trim in six months we will see because I trimmed twice in a month!) I am constantly looking at YouTube videos at stuff i know already because I'm knowledgeable just about with anything about hair! I feel like when i talk to my mom, sis and best friend about hair i feel like i bore them and just have to shut up because i can go on and on about hair and tips. Diagnose me ladies!  I have OCD don't I?


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## kupenda (Aug 6, 2013)

Im lazy as hayle when it comes to my hair.  I dont do anything consistently.  I wash it weekly. And anything else that happens is spur of the moment.

Im super excited to get my hair straightened. I dont care if it screws with my curl pattern etc. I just wanna see my length. And I dont wanna have to detangle.

I dont use shears to remove ssk's. I either ignore them or pull them out with my nails. No regrets


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## Blessed&higlyflavoured (Aug 7, 2013)

Keedah said:


> I wish my hair was just a little less thick. Even though its shoulder length I can barely put it in a ponytail unless its blow dried straight!


 
This. I'm meeting a friend tomorrow for lunch and i wanted to put my hair in a bun. It laughed at me and my pathetic tiny hairband

I'm worried that because i protective style alot of the time and its been so effective at thickening my hair up, as it gets longer and thicker i wont be able to look after it properly and i'll end up back to eaten up, chewed up hair

I hate hair-know-it-alls. There's more than one right answer to healthy hair 

I force my bf to massage my scalp. he hates the feeling of oily fingers. but I DO NOT CARE. It feels soooooo gooooooood. he knows that if he doesnt do it, i'll find someone who will 

It leaves a bad taste in my mouth when my sisters tell me about my hair. I'd rather it was broken and split to my scalp through my own mistreatment than to have it break due to someone elses bad advice. If i destroy it i only have myself blame. 

I love going over which products im going to buy and how i'm going to use them. 

I spend spare time coming up with a grand unifying hair theory. Its silly, but i love it 

I attract more lint than the average person. I swear down. Its ridiculous. 

I'm my own hair porn. I truly believe that my hair is the best hair for me. When i first started this hair journey, i'd covet any healthy hair, now i'm more patient 

I think full apl would be more than enough hair for me. I say that now as a shoulder length 4b natural


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## naija24 (Aug 7, 2013)

real talk?

I hate long hair. Especially on me. I think it makes me look generic and bland. I like standing out and I think short hair is best on me. Full, thick and straight SL would be ideal. 

I only came to LHCF for healthy hair practices.

I would only be natural if I used heat regularly.

It's not a "Big Chop" if you've been transitioning for 2-3 years. By then, you're natural in my book. 

I think product junkies are weird and silly but I respect yall. 

I can't stand militant natural loving black women. Congrats, you're natural. It's just hair. It's not that serious.

I can't stand weave. I tolerate braids.

I'm really lazy with my hair. I respect the ladies that spend 3-4 hours a weekend washing their hair and doing protective styles. If I spend more than 1 hour doing ANYTHING regarding my appearance, I get seriously annoyed.


----------



## Ogoma (Aug 7, 2013)

I am so in love with my hair, I want to make love to it


----------



## LivingInPeace (Aug 7, 2013)

My confessions:
I love that I get compliments on my natural hair almost every day, even though it's usually in a bun.
My hair is APL now which is longer than it's ever been but it still feels short to me.
Whenever I go to the drugstore I walk the hair care aisle, just to look.
I love when people ask me for hair advice.
I can't stop touching my hair.
When my mother told me I should straighten my hair so I could show it off I grinned like an idiot inside.


----------



## brownb83 (Aug 7, 2013)

I love my rollerset hair. I get asked quite a bit if it's weave and it makes me sad.


----------



## leiah (Aug 7, 2013)

I don't like my hair type. Even though i used to relax, i don't feel like it matters that im natural.


----------



## softblackcotton (Aug 7, 2013)

Its no secret on this forum. I've posted about my big secret a couple of times before.  I've been dealing with trichotillomania consistently for the past 7 years. For those who don't want to google its the obsessive compulsive disorder one has to pull out their own body hair. it could be from anywhere on the body. I have been pulling from my scalp for 7 years now and I really wish I could stop completely. You ask the why don't you just stop?!  Don't you want long hair?! I really do. but its like a terrible habit like drugs like smoking. Right now I have nearly bald spots that about 3-4 inches in diameter on the left and right sides of my head. It's like I'm missing 15% of my hair. I thank God my hair is thick enough to keep the bald spots covered though. I can only wear certain styles, no styles like cornrows or Bantu knots though. I hardly let anyone do my hair, when they do I just say something vague like "I've been having some breakage." It's my biggest shameful secret.


----------



## pre_medicalrulz (Aug 7, 2013)

softblackcotton said:


> Its no secret on this forum. I've posted about my big secret a couple of times before.  I've been dealing with trichotillomania consistently for the past 7 years. For those who don't want to google its the obsessive compulsive disorder one has to pull out their own body hair. it could be from anywhere on the body. I have been pulling from my scalp for 7 years now and I really wish I could stop completely. You ask the why don't you just stop?!  Don't you want long hair?! I really do. but its like a terrible habit like drugs like smoking. Right now I have nearly bald spots that about 3-4 inches in diameter on the left and right sides of my head. It's like I'm missing 15% of my hair. I thank God my hair is thick enough to keep the bald spots covered though. I can only wear certain styles, no styles like cornrows or Bantu knots though. I hardly let anyone do my hair, when they do I just say something vague like "I've been having some breakage." It's my biggest shameful secret.



Shouldn't the pain alone make you stop? *ouch*


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## Saludable84 (Aug 7, 2013)

Deleted Post


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## Fuu (Aug 7, 2013)

softblackcotton said:


> Its no secret on this forum. I've posted about my big secret a couple of times before.  I've been dealing with trichotillomania consistently for the past 7 years. For those who don't want to google its the obsessive compulsive disorder one has to pull out their own body hair. it could be from anywhere on the body. I have been pulling from my scalp for 7 years now and I really wish I could stop completely. You ask the why don't you just stop?!  Don't you want long hair?! I really do. but its like a terrible habit like drugs like smoking. Right now I have nearly bald spots that about 3-4 inches in diameter on the left and right sides of my head. It's like I'm missing 15% of my hair. I thank God my hair is thick enough to keep the bald spots covered though. I can only wear certain styles, no styles like cornrows or Bantu knots though. I hardly let anyone do my hair, when they do I just say something vague like "I've been having some breakage." It's my biggest shameful secret.



Thank you for sharing~ You just gave me that final push to de-lurk and pay my $6.50. 

I've read extensively about this because I also suffer from it. I've been searching and searching for a way to stop for years! It started for me back in 2001. I've read that the severity varies from person to person. 

It seems that the only options so far are; medication, support groups, or Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT).


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## softblackcotton (Aug 7, 2013)

pre_medicalrulz said:


> Shouldn't the pain alone make you stop? *ouch*



It's not painful at all. It's hard to explain but it actually feels good and relaxes me somehow. I sought professional help three years ago, but it didn't really work.


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## softblackcotton (Aug 7, 2013)

Fuu said:


> Thank you for sharing~ You just gave me that final push to de-lurk and pay my $6.50.
> 
> I've read extensively about this because I also suffer from it. I've been searching and searching for a way to stop for years! It started for me back in 2001. I've read that the severity varies from person to person.
> 
> It seems that the only options so far are; medication, support groups, or Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT).




Yay! Congrats on joining! :happy: Its always  good to find another person who really understands trich. If you do a thread search there are many other posters who suffer on this forum. My first bout actually started when I was 8 years old then had huge break, another short bout at 16, 6 year break, and then now on my longest bout that started since I was 21 and I'm now  28. I actually tried cognitive-behavioral therapy 3 years ago but it only worked during treatment. The only thing that had allowed me a little break here and there  is wearing braid extensions but as soon as I take them out what little growth I achieve I eventually yank it back out so its not a permanent solution. I haven't had braid extension since last November and now I am too ashamed to go to braider now that the bald spots are worst.


----------



## Fuu (Aug 7, 2013)

softblackcotton said:


> Yay! Congrats on joining! :happy: Its always  good to find another person who really understands trich. If you do a thread search there are many other posters who suffer on this forum. My first bout actually started when I was 8 years old then had huge break, another short bout at 16, 6 year break, and then now on my longest bout that started since I was 21 and I'm now  28. I actually tried cognitive-behavioral therapy 3 years ago but it only worked during treatment. The only thing that had allowed me little break here and three is wearing braid extensions but as soon as I take them out what little growth I achieve I eventually yank it back out. I haven't had braid extension since last November and now I am too ashamed to go to braider now that the bald spots are worst.



I'm sorry to hear that it never worked. I never told anybody about it before. I've never been to any kind if therapy or anything. I've never had a break from it since it started. I've managed to stop pulling the hairs from my head though by somehow compensating with pulling more from other areas. I completely understand the feel associated with doing it. It's an almost irritating feeling to try to not do it. I get agitated. 

P.S~ Sorry if my thoughts seem a bit all over the place. I'm not good at articulating.


----------



## SmilingElephant (Aug 9, 2013)

I wish i had real life 3c/3b friends. I feel alone in the Real Life natural world. Every single natural i know in real life has 4a/4b hair and they either treat me like an ****** unicorn or give me the rudest attitude. 

I used to try not to get into hair typing....but in real life I've been so "othered" its like...like im not welcome amongst type 4 naturals. 

I almost feel like i should flipping apologize to them for having loose curls. Im ****** sorry that not all of my curls are the size of pen springs and coffee stirrers! Yes the majority of my curls are the size of pencils and sharpies. 

I feel left out often...i love talking hair...but i notice there's a real sisterhood amongst type 4 naturals and i don't have that experience  if i enter the conversation or am part of it...Type 4s are adamant about telling me what i should/could do to my hair bc i have "that type of hair"...or they want to see it straightened.  Or they will just  I don't tell them what to do and oftentimes i give a compliment. 

Another thing that grinds my ****** gears about being a type 3 natural...is that ive seen numerous times ppl throwing shade bc a type 3 acknowledges this crap and says something about it....its real outchere! Its even hard to find t shirts that celebrate curly hair. I have only seen about 4 shirts i like amongst the THOUSANDS of shirts and accessories made to celebrate fros and kinky hair. 

I guess im just frustrated bc i don't know any other Black women in real life with 3b/3c hair. All i relate to are the few i find on Youtube. Nobody in my family has hair like mine either. I was even thinking of trying to form a FB group or something. 

I know the saying is "it wouldn't be an issue if you didn't make it one"...but i didn't.. its just things I've noticed as my hair gets longer. Once again in life im an outcast.


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## nissi (Aug 9, 2013)

SmilingElephant, naturallycurly.com has the CurlTalk discussion forum broken down by curl types. Best wishes!


----------



## Killahkurlz (Aug 9, 2013)

SmilingElephant said:


> I wish i had real life 3c/3b friends. I feel alone in the Real Life natural world. Every single natural i know in real life has 4a/4b hair and they either treat me like an ****** unicorn or give me the rudest attitude.
> 
> I used to try not to get into hair typing....but in real life I've been so "othered" its like...like im not welcome amongst type 4 naturals.
> 
> ...



Which city do u live n?


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## Killahkurlz (Aug 9, 2013)

drjo91 said:


> I think i agree with the bold part. Then again, i never liked getting relaxers!! I just hated how it burns my scalp and my hair would look so thin.



Ditto. And then when ur hair starts growing, the roots stop.the length from swinging freely. I HATED that.  Id rather have all my hair 1 texture, all the time.


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## Kinky4Agirl (Aug 9, 2013)

I wear long straight sew-ins only because my boyfriend is white. I actually hate sew-ins and prefer my own hair.


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## SmilingElephant (Aug 9, 2013)

Killahkurlz said:


> Which city do u live n?



I live on the South side of Orlando.

Idk where the other 3s are hiding.... The only other type 3s i DO see are Hispanic women...but they have that fine/silky type 3 hair...mine is coarse 3c...Medium, even. It doesn't shine like the typical type 3 hair you think of...it has sheen but it doesn't shine and its not fine....for the most part.

There was only ONE other girl at my job that had my kind of hair...but she was kind of stuck up (well, that was my vibe from her...i could be wrong) and i never really spoke to her...she doesn't work there anymore.


Also....am i wrong for feeling like im in a petting zoo? I HATE when my coworkers boing my curls or feel the need to touch my hair. I think type 4 hair is amazing and when i first went natural i thought i would be a type 4  In fact i am in LOVE with the Type 4 curl pattern that is at my nape..you can't really see it though unless i lift my hair up...but even though i find it beautiful...i don't just feel the need to touch ppls hair. And they always catch me off guard! I almost popped this one girl in the nose because she scared me when she pulled on my hair!

Idk...im just frustrated...and sleep deprived....and stressed. Happy Friday all


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## kandiekj100 (Aug 9, 2013)

If I had a daughter I'd want her to have 4b hair just so that I take care of it and show my family that you don't need my 4a hair or, "good hair" as they all call it, in order to have long healthy hair. Bad part however, is probably no matter how different are hair is I still would hear oh she has your hair, no wonder it's long. 

 Also my younger son had 3c/4a hair and everyone fawned over a little too much. I hate they to think of everyone paying so my attention my girl's hair and somehow thinking she's better than the other little girls in our family just b/c of the hair. I hated how people treated my younger son versus my older son, strictly b/c of the hair differences. My older son actually has a slight complex about it. I have to contstantly tell him that I love his hair type, but I'm just his mom, ya know. I gotta say those things.

I still get compliments on my hair that make me uncomfortable. I think its one thing to compliment one's hairstyle or something, but when I'm around certain family I'm made to feel like some anomaly. 

And it just grinds my gears that no matter how well I take care of my hair, my good hair practices will NEVER be the reason I have long hair. Never mind that I don't use heat very often. Never mind that I co-wash or do put a leave-in conditioner in my hair often. Never mind that a deep condition. Never mind that I protective style. Never mind that I stretch my relaxer. I will only have reached BSL/MBL (hopefully by the of the year) b/c of my hair type. I've never been that length in my adult life at all. 

Oh yea, and I'm not really allowed to complain about my hair. Because obviously my hair doesn't have issues with dryness, tangles and naps. Just  to all of it.


----------



## Saludable84 (Aug 9, 2013)

Kinky4Agirl said:


> I wear long straight sew-ins only because my boyfriend is white. I actually hate sew-ins and prefer my own hair.



I actually use to kill my poor head relaxing bone straight and blowing my poor roots for this reason alone. My husband is super light Dominican (he doesn't even look Spanish). One day I told him its a struggle because I keep my hair straight because I know that's what he grew up with. I also told him that's why I was obsessed for having long hair. Bad assumption on my part because then he confessed he'd prefer my hair short and natural; that I should be lucky to have textured hair that's versatile and not straight long and dead. 

I'm texlaxed now, and the added texture allows me to wear twist outs better. He doesn't care for my hair straight, usually request for it in styles that are not straight. 

I'm not sure if you asked you S/O about this, but you'd be surprised what they think half the time.

Please excuse my iPhone; it's trying to get it together


----------



## iVR (Aug 9, 2013)

I can't stand having PS's in my head longer than 2 days.  After 2 days I have to take it down, wash/condition, M&S, and redo it.  It doesn't help that I'm tender-headed.


----------



## Destiny9109 (Aug 9, 2013)

I want some microbraids


----------



## Destiny9109 (Aug 9, 2013)

I'm deathly afraid to go to a stylist again.........even Reniece


----------



## Lissa0821 (Aug 9, 2013)

I really don't want to flat iron or blow dry my hair for a while, not that I hate heat at all.  I just don't want to do any extra steps on wash day.


----------



## Napp (Aug 9, 2013)

I like my bkts even if everyone else dosent


----------



## nissi (Aug 9, 2013)

It annoys me when I find that people have used me for my hair info. 

ETA: Someone with no hair maliciously massaged a perm into my nape when I didn't know better years ago, and as a result, the nape is shorter than it used to be. I have to make a conscious choice to drop the anger and really kick in with some solutions.

And I have been spending way too much time on here lately.


----------



## Blessed&higlyflavoured (Aug 13, 2013)

I sometimes seal with oil sheen.


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## MizzBFly (Aug 13, 2013)

Saludable84~

I agree with making that assumption, my husband is east indian and blk. and I though he perferred my hair straight He hated the weaves and LOVES when I wear my hair in curls, braid outs everything BUT straight..lol


kandiekj100 - people act that way about my daughter and I dont like it, she is more than her hair!!

nissi- yeah this happens alot, try to friend you up with questions then up pop the hair questions, but then I think I really like sharing this information BUT only if they take HEED. Don't have me wasting my breathe about this or that....just saying dang...lol


----------



## summertimewine (Aug 13, 2013)

People often don't believe my hair is my own. I have 3B hair that is only shoulder length, but my curls are loose, round, and shiny. I often have women with 4A-Z hair that constantly try and clown on me for no reason. They always ask "Is that your hair?" And when I say yes they always ask if they can touch iterplexed. Hell no! I don't want anyone's grimy hands touching me. Then they always say "I knew it was a wig!" they laugh in my face and then leave. I even have people who wait until I'm leaving or turn around to grab as much hair as possible and then they yank!  I have to curse at least 10 women AND men out a week for that bs!! I work on retail btw. It makes me angry that no one believes I need to take care of my hair. Like I can just leave it and it magically grows on its own. No! I take care of my hair, and I'd like some recognition for that! Ugh I don't know anyone with my hair texture and I'm tired of every other natural calling me a fake, or saying that I should be lucky I'm mixed and I have "good hair". Do people really think my hair doesn't tangle, or get dry? I seriously wanna strangle people with these thoughts


----------



## TraciChanel (Aug 14, 2013)

I'm going to miss the summer. I'm so enjoying wet bunning.


----------



## Lissa0821 (Aug 14, 2013)

I really don't need to moisturize and seal every day but I do it out of habit. So my moisturized fluffy hair one day is usually limp the next.


----------



## Killahkurlz (Aug 14, 2013)

I'm kind of obsessed with hair now. So much so that I thought I wanted to go into cosmetology.  I later found out I just like doing MY hair.  But I'm still obsessed.
I look at everyone's hair.  I look at mine even more.  I'll go to the bathroom just to look in the mirror at my hair. I'm always touching my hair. Thank You God  for two strand twists because that would otherwise be a problem. I'm totally not used to my hair being this long and I'm only coming up on bsl and I know my hate will grow longer.  I won't know WHAT to do with myself when I reach wl.
I talk about hair a lot too.  Luckily my bf doesn't mind and my friends like hearing what I have to say.
I think hair forums are partially to blame for my sickness sigh.


----------



## Killahkurlz (Aug 14, 2013)

frogkisses said:


> People often don't believe my hair is my own. I have 3B hair that is only shoulder length, but my curls are loose, round, and shiny. I often have women with 4A-Z hair that constantly try and clown on me for no reason. They always ask "Is that your hair?" And when I say yes they always ask if they can touch iterplexed. Hell no! I don't want anyone's grimy hands touching me. Then they always say "I knew it was a wig!" they laugh in my face and then leave. I even have people who wait until I'm leaving or turn around to grab as much hair as possible and then they yank!  I have to curse at least 10 women AND men out a week for that bs!! I work on retail btw. It makes me angry that no one believes I need to take care of my hair. Like I can just leave it and it magically grows on its own. No! I take care of my hair, and I'd like some recognition for that! Ugh I don't know anyone with my hair texture and I'm tired of every other natural calling me a fake, or saying that I should be lucky I'm mixed and I have "good hair". Do people really think my hair doesn't tangle, or get dry? I seriously wanna strangle people with these thoughts



People are just ignorant.


----------



## Killahkurlz (Aug 14, 2013)

SmilingElephant said:


> I live on the South side of Orlando.
> 
> Idk where the other 3s are hiding.... The only other type 3s i DO see are Hispanic women...but they have that fine/silky type 3 hair...mine is coarse 3c...Medium, even. It doesn't shine like the typical type 3 hair you think of...it has sheen but it doesn't shine and its not fine....for the most part.
> 
> ...



Well, u r not the only waking petting zoo let me assure u


----------



## LdyKamz (Aug 14, 2013)

I'm still afraid to wear my twa to work because I think I may be fired. Is that an irrational fear? This is partly because years ago a black college student that worked here wore an african print shirt for his presentation later and he was told he had to change. Too ethnic I guess. Some of these people here are just...ugh!


----------



## Ogoma (Aug 14, 2013)

I have lost all sympathy for our hair complexes. I just find them insidiously silly and annoying now. Do people not grow?


----------



## lovely_locks (Aug 14, 2013)

TWA stage is the hardest to get over. I only have one hair style option. Oh! And my hair has like zero curl because of the length.


----------



## lovely_locks (Aug 14, 2013)

Forgot to add pics. This i isa the back


----------



## summertimewine (Aug 14, 2013)

Killahkurlz SmilingElephant Yes I agree, people are very ignorant. I remember when Shameless Maya shaved her head off and people on the forum were "unimpressed because it would just grow back in a year." Stuff like that makes me cringe. Southern California doesn't have any 3 b/c that I can find either! I can't find anyone on YouTube that has hair like mine, only some similarities


----------



## ms.blue (Aug 14, 2013)

My confessions:

While I love my natural hair, it has become a burden since I'm not the best at styling.  My s/o who is Hispanic encouraged me to wear my natural hair which I have for about 2 months now but real talk, I miss my weaves.  I miss flatironing,  heat curling and the wind blowing through my hair.

I'm tired of being frustrated that my twist outs don't to seem to last long.  The simple fact I have to do my hair often get on my nerves.   Also getting called sista soldijah, nappy roots and village girl is getting old real quick.

If I could stand the feeling of a relaxer on my scalp, I would relax my in a hot second but then again, I would miss the natural bush.

I wished I had the same texture and curl pattern all around.  My left side is more of a 4a/b mix which the texture is kinda rough but the right is more 4a and the texture is slightly smoother.  The nape is 4a on both sides except the middle is wavy due to the weight of my hair now and I hate it just because styling is harder in that area.

Oddly enough, I do love my hair and how versatile it is plus I love the natural darkness of my hair.  I often get ask if I color/dye my hair.  I also love my shrinkage. ...I get a huge kick when I pull my hair straight and see how long my hair is straight compared to when in it's curly state.


----------



## GettingKinky (Aug 14, 2013)

One of the main reasons I still go see my stylist (aside from having her cover my grays) is because I love all the compliments I get on my hair.


----------



## genesislocks (Aug 14, 2013)

I've been waiting to get this off my chest.
My confession?:

I love my hair straight, it looks so much better on me. It complements any and every outfit and it's easy as pie to maintain at night.

I wish I could wear it straight all the time and still enjoy the abundant health of abstaining from heat.


----------



## iVR (Aug 14, 2013)

frogkisses said:


> People often don't believe my hair is my own. I have 3B hair that is only shoulder length, but my curls are loose, round, and shiny. I often have women with 4A-Z hair that constantly try and clown on me for no reason. They always ask "Is that your hair?" And when I say yes they always ask if they can touch iterplexed. Hell no! I don't want anyone's grimy hands touching me. Then they always say "I knew it was a wig!" they laugh in my face and then leave. I even have people who wait until I'm leaving or turn around to grab as much hair as possible and then they yank!  I have to curse at least 10 women AND men out a week for that bs!! I work on retail btw. It makes me angry that no one believes I need to take care of my hair. Like I can just leave it and it magically grows on its own. No! I take care of my hair, and I'd like some recognition for that! Ugh I don't know anyone with my hair texture and I'm tired of every other natural calling me a fake, or saying that I should be lucky I'm mixed and I have "good hair". Do people really think my hair doesn't tangle, or get dry? I seriously wanna strangle people with these thoughts



Same problem here.  Thankfully I haven't had any people stupid enough to pull on my hair.  I'd have to lay hands on them, and then pray for them.


----------



## Lilmama1011 (Aug 15, 2013)

I have like bipolar mood swings with my hair, one minute I'm loving it and the next i hate it and want to chop it off. I have never hated my hair like this even when it was coming out more because of me not combing properly and over manipulating it before I had knowledge about hair. But my hair was so much thicker before I joined lhcf and now I have thin ends I'm cutting frequently because of when I start to hate my hair again but I don't want short hair. I probably need to cut hair off to my chin honestly but I don't have the urge to do it.


----------



## Blessed&higlyflavoured (Aug 15, 2013)

I always think when people put food in their hair that they should just eat it. Its almost disrespectful in my mind to go to the supermarket and buy avocados and what not. Unless its going to compost or free, just eat it.


----------



## EnExitStageLeft (Aug 15, 2013)

When people outside of the hair boards ask for hair advice it literally takes all that I have not too...

1. Test to find their porosity
2. Determine their strand size
3. Configure a Regimen
4. Take a trip to the BSS to find product that best fit their hair and regimen

ON SITE!

You may think I'm exaggerating, but I'm dead serious. Ask my coworker and 2 of my church members ....


----------



## MileHighDiva (Aug 16, 2013)

frogkisses said:


> People often don't believe my hair is my own. I have 3B hair that is only shoulder length, but my curls are loose, round, and shiny. I often have women with 4A-Z hair that constantly try and clown on me for no reason. They always ask "Is that your hair?" And when I say yes they always ask if they can touch iterplexed. Hell no! I don't want anyone's grimy hands touching me. Then they always say "I knew it was a wig!" they laugh in my face and then leave. I even have people who wait until I'm leaving or turn around to grab as much hair as possible and then they yank!  I have to curse at least 10 women AND men out a week for that bs!! I work on retail btw. It makes me angry that no one believes I need to take care of my hair. Like I can just leave it and it magically grows on its own. No! I take care of my hair, and I'd like some recognition for that! Ugh I don't know anyone with my hair texture and I'm tired of every other natural calling me a fake, or saying that I should be lucky I'm mixed and I have "good hair". Do people really think my hair doesn't tangle, or get dry? I seriously wanna strangle people with these thoughts



leiah Mz.MoMo5235, y'all need to come help frogkisses deal with haters'  she has your hair type and needs emotional support.


----------



## Mz.MoMo5235 (Aug 16, 2013)

frogkisses You're not alone.  Unfortunately there are a lot of people that dont realize "black" not only comes in different shades but in different textures.  I go through the same thing and you just have to have tough skin about it.  Just last weekend I went out with my hair in a wng and a co-workers boyfriend decided he wanted to clown my hair and say I had a jerri curl and started singing the soul glo theme song (I hated the fact I love that song at that moment).  I just laughed rolled my eyes and told him how that was the first time anyone has ever said that and how original he must feel.

I've also had cases irl where other naturals have excluded me from hair talk because "I'm not 'really' black"  or because "I dont really understand what its like to be natural"

HEIFER!!!  I had to get off the creamy crack just like you and learn how to deal with something my mom didnt even know how to handle!  I had to learn from scratch and believe it or not a lot of the the things I do other 4b-z's do as well.  But you cant educate the world.

All you can do is come here to an environment where people understand you and accept your hair as is and make crazy vent threads about Indian people talking smack about your hair 

Ok... I'm done lol


----------



## Lilmama1011 (Aug 16, 2013)

Mz.MoMo5235 said:


> frogkisses You're not alone.  Unfortunately there are a lot of people that dont realize "black" not only comes in different shades but in different textures.  I go through the same thing and you just have to have tough skin about it.  Just last weekend I went out with my hair in a wng and a co-workers boyfriend decided he wanted to clown my hair and say I had a jerri curl and started singing the soul glo theme song (I hated the fact I love that song at that moment).  I just laughed rolled my eyes and told him how that was the first time anyone has ever said that and how original he must feel.
> 
> I've also had cases irl where other naturals have excluded me from hair talk because "I'm not 'really' black"  or because "I dont really understand what its like to be natural"
> 
> ...



I'm not going to lie, before I joined the board i use to think all black people had type four hair or that they were mixed. I just was at my cousin's house and this girl, I assumed she was Hispanic or something and she struck up a conversation and she was like "you know us black people always got to have something  in us" and I told my SO "I didn't even know she was black, she has like very defined curls type 3" and he was like" I could tell she was black, how could you not? I have people in my family who have that type of hair" I do as well but you know I ASSumed smh. It also goes for people who are mixed and they still have type 4 and people be like oh please, you don't have a mix of nothing lol


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## MileHighDiva (Aug 16, 2013)

SmilingElephant, you can follow this YouTuber, she has a loose curl pattern. If I think of anyone else, I'll let you know.  https://www.youtube.com/user/SunKissAlba and Shameless Maya

Please remember your hair is like a finger print, nobody's is the same.  In addition, forget your IRL cast of characters, you have support here. HTH!

ETA: My fine hair idol Chicoro has type 3 hair.  You can follow her on YT at https://www.youtube.com/user/MsChicoro   Also, you can subscribe to her newsletter at http://www.beautifybitbybitgi.com/  In addition, I highly recommend her book Grow It.  You may be able to check it out from your local library or request it through inter library loan (ILL) if they don't have it.

ETA2: You need to tell your friends that porosity, density, and how thick or thin each individual strand is more important than Andre Walker's hair typing system.  It creates division in the hair community.  Of course, you'll tell them this as you flip your curls that they hate on so much in their face

ETA3: http://www.youtube.com/user/srdesigns1


----------



## summertimewine (Aug 16, 2013)

Mz.MoMo5235 Tbh it seems like everyone is down to educate about the 4A-Z hair but everyone else kinda falls off. If you have 3a-c hair good luck getting sound advice. Thankfully this community really tries and help its members rather than just try and banish anyone not 4a-z. On one website I asked a question and half the answers were "your hair will grow on its own 3B hair doesn't break off.' Seriously. All I needed was a protein treatment  thankfully I found this forum and all of that nonsense is kind of scarce. 

But you're right! I cannot sit down with people and tell them about my hair and how I still struggle. I just gotta take names and whoop *** 

Lilmama1011 I'm glad you were nice to her at least! I think it is a surprise when black women have type 3 hair. It kinda throws people off so they want to start making excuses. Like Oh she's mixed, or its a wig, or thats a roller set etc. But I think once you realize we all trying to use the same products and we are all trying to get healthier hair then it seems less of a she has "good hair" thing. I think Momo was right in saying we experience a lot, if not all of the same problems 4a-z's face 

MileHighDiva I love Sun Kissed Alba! Her videos are very straight forward and she is to pretty!


----------



## BostonMaria (Aug 16, 2013)

llan said:


> I always think when people put food in their hair that they should just eat it. Its almost disrespectful in my mind to go to the supermarket and buy avocados and what not. Unless its going to compost or free, just eat it.



Ahaha I usually eat half the avocado then use the other half for my hair. I also use mayo, eggs, coconut milk, EVOO, etc...

Sent from my iPhone using LHCF


----------



## Napp (Aug 16, 2013)

I feel like because my hair is short my advice is not as considered as someone with longer hair even if they have been misinformed about the topic.


----------



## MileHighDiva (Aug 16, 2013)

Napp, that is not true!  I feel your the most knowledgeable person on this board when it comes to BKT's and roller setting.  I remember when you broke it down, regarding smoke points not having anything to do with oils preventing heat damage.  If someone doesn't respect your voice they're cray-cray!


----------



## ronie (Aug 16, 2013)

Napp said:


> I feel like because my hair is short my advice is not as considered as someone with longer hair even if they have been misinformed about the topic.



I have to agree with MileHighDiva I always love reading your posts: to the point and very informative. Then again my hair is shorter than yours, lol. Just kidding, but yeah I see where you're coming from, but if only one person can benefit from what you have to say, Preach on sista. I for one will listen.


----------



## Napp (Aug 16, 2013)

MileHighDiva said:


> Napp, that is not true!  I feel your the most knowledgeable person on this board when it comes to BKT's and roller setting.  I remember when you broke it down, regarding smoke points not having anything to do with oils preventing heat damage.  If someone doesn't respect your voice they're cray-cray!





ronie said:


> I have to agree with MileHighDiva I always love reading your posts: to the point and very informative. Then again my hair is shorter than yours, lol. Just kidding, but yeah I see where you're coming from, but if only one person can benefit from what you have to say, Preach on sista. I for one will listen.



Thanks!  I feel better now!


----------



## Gryphyn (Aug 16, 2013)

I found this thread so entertaining I read the whole thing

I'm kind of ashamed of how long I've been a member here, considering my hair length. I've considered starting a new account a few times just so people won't judge (if anyone even does ). 

I used to think my natural hair would grow long regardless, just because it was natural. It was only after being stuck at the same length for years that I finally started trying stuff other lhcf ladies were doing  

One of the reasons I gave up on my natural hair is because I would get pains in my knuckles when I tried to detangle it. When I finally got a texturizer I felt like a sell-out but I also felt bloody liberated.

My SO is mixed with Indian and had WL hair when I met him (he had cornrows). His hair is so thick that I think it feels like pubic hair and I just pray that if we have a daughter in future she has a mix of both of our hair types so it's a bit softer, but still grows long easily, and I don't have to break my fingers off to do her hair. I feel absolutely terrible for saying that, but it's the confession thread, right?

I loathe the day my stylist texlaxed my hair. He should have been more clear on exactly what he was doing. I'm also mad at myself for now paying more attention.

I won't ever stop going to a salon to get my hair done because  I feel like Jessica Rabbit when I leave 

I feel embarrassed giving people hair advice. I can speak so expertly on it because I'm on here a lot, but I have almost nothing to show for my knowledge. Meanwhile my sister who doesn't take care of her hair AT ALL has always had longer hair than me (we have different hair types).

I wish my mom had taken the time to learn how to care for my hair when I was little. Instead she says it was too curly and didn't know what to do with it. I was always the kid at school with short braids that  were coming undone by lunchtime  and when she eventually started relaxing it the relaxer chewed up my hair b/c my hair can't tolerate being relaxed too straight. The girls in my class that year used to make fun on me and call me Elmer Fud 

I want long hair to prove everyone wrong. Once I get to MBL and prove my point I'll probably just cut it back to APL so it's easier to manage daily.


----------



## majinbuu252 (Aug 16, 2013)

I keep falling off with my regimen then wonder why my hair is acting up.


----------



## LdyKamz (Aug 16, 2013)

I feel like I can take one look at anyone else's hair and know what they need. But when it comes to my own I have questions galore on what I need to do for it. I can't seem to figure it out, especially now that I'm natural.

I don't get it. When I touch my hair I have to wonder, is it supposed to feel like that? Is this good or bad? When I touch someone else's hair I know if they need to dc more often, or if they need to add more protein to their regimen. When it comes to me I always second guess.


----------



## whiteoleander91 (Aug 16, 2013)

Wrong thread lol


----------



## Mz.MoMo5235 (Aug 17, 2013)

Napp said:


> I feel like because my hair is short my advice is not as considered as someone with longer hair even if they have been misinformed about the topic.



I feel you 100% on that!!!  TRUST


----------



## Aireen (Aug 17, 2013)

When people touch my hair, I always worry that it isn't soft enough. 

I know two of the black friends I have are/were jealous of my hair. One of them I see regularly always has to look or comment about it which is both a good and bad thing. A month ago I relaxed my hair and met up with a friend a day or two later, first thing she says when she sees me in a particularly rude tone is "Your hair looks very flat today." Later on in the day when I put my hair up she says, "This is the first  time I've seen your hair up!" so I continue by adding that I was  thinking of doing it but didn't bother. Her reply then is, "You should have." Honestly I know this is mean but I couldn't help but think _"My hair is going to look flat for a few days until I wash it but your hair seems like it's in a permanently damaged state."_  Sorry, but I'm tired of people with damaged hair saying the most.

I can't stand seeing relaxed/texlaxed girls on Youtube do their length checks by pulling, tugging, and stretching their hair all the way down to say their hair reaches a certain point. Okay maybe there's some shrinkage due to having new growth or the hair not being completely straight but your hair isn't naturally going to fall all the way to the point you're stretching your hair up to anyway. I honestly find all the extra pulling looks so silly.


----------



## Healthb4Length (Aug 17, 2013)

I feel that there's a unnecessary divide between type 4 and 3 naturals. I feel that a lot of type 4s do give type 3s a hard time and don't take their hair struggles into consideration. I've been seeing it lately on lots if hair boards and I'm baffled. 

Type 3s there are a lot of blogs and hair boards that address your needs. Naturallycurly.com comes to mind, also curlynikki.com and there are a whole bunch of products specifically marketed for type 3s. Us 4s are just getting our due in the past 2-4 years or so. 

As a type 4b/c natural I find my hair easy to handle. I don't have unrealistic expectations and I know what works for me. 

Wash & Goes? GTFOH! What's the big deal about doing a wash & go anyways?

Spending/wasting hours defining curl pattern? Again, why? Your hair wasn't meant to do that so stop throwing shade at others who do have a defined pattern and KIM!

Here's my advice, KISS when it comes to your hair. Do what works for you, there are plenty of type 4 naturals who give solid advice but when starting a new hair journey you will have experiment with products and techniques until you find what works for you! Yes you might have to go through the ugly to get to the pretty st times! It gets easier if you go with the flow of your hair rather than against it. Trust me! 

Oh another thing! Whenever a long haired type 4 natural gives advice stop questioning her hair type! Its  a total contradiction, chicks praise it to the mountaintop how Black women can grow any  length hair we want but as soon as someone proves that myth right, her texture (I noticed this with type 4s) is questioned. Oh she can't really be type 4! She must be a 3c etc! Like WTF??

Ok rant over, I just had to let that out b/c I've been noticing a trend lately.


----------



## MileHighDiva (Aug 18, 2013)

SmilingElephant, you should probably follow Lucia on the board.  She frequently posts hair inspiration videos.  Anyway, here's another YouTuber you can follow based on today's inspiration post.  http://www.youtube.com/user/1ballerina


----------



## LivingInPeace (Aug 18, 2013)

Aireen said:


> When people touch my hair, I always worry that it isn't soft enough.
> 
> I know two of the black friends I have are/were jealous of my hair. One of them I see regularly always has to look or comment about it which is both a good and bad thing. A month ago I relaxed my hair and met up with a friend a day or two later, first thing she says when she sees me in a particularly rude tone is "Your hair looks very flat today." Later on in the day when I put my hair up she says, "This is the first  time I've seen your hair up!" so I continue by adding that I was  thinking of doing it but didn't bother. Her reply then is, "You should have." Honestly I know this is mean but I couldn't help but think _"My hair is going to look flat for a few days until I wash it but your hair seems like it's in a permanently damaged state."_  Sorry, but I'm tired of people with damaged hair saying the most.
> 
> ...


----------



## melahnee (Aug 18, 2013)

i took out my own weave yesterday..i cut a lock of my own hair out  you can't really tell but i'm soo over weaves right now even though it was not the weave's fault lol


----------



## SmilingElephant (Aug 19, 2013)

Confession:

Since I've gone natural...for the first time i feel like im beautiful/pretty. I love my hair. I love how fast it grows...and even with shrinkage it now rests on my back. Even tho im annoyed with how its hard to find others with my hair...i really do love my hair. 

I wasn't the "pretty" girl growing up. I had some deep self esteem issues. Still have some to work on...but being natural has been a big step toward me learning to love myself.


----------



## darlingdiva (Aug 19, 2013)

Aireen said:


> When people touch my hair, I always worry that it isn't soft enough.
> 
> I know two of the black friends I have are/were jealous of my hair. One of them I see regularly always has to look or comment about it which is both a good and bad thing. A month ago I relaxed my hair and met up with a friend a day or two later, first thing she says when she sees me in a particularly rude tone is "Your hair looks very flat today." Later on in the day when I put my hair up she says, "This is the first  time I've seen your hair up!" so I continue by adding that I was  thinking of doing it but didn't bother. Her reply then is, "You should have." Honestly I know this is mean but I couldn't help but think "My hair is going to look flat for a few days until I wash it but your hair seems like it's in a permanently damaged state."  Sorry, but I'm tired of people with damaged hair saying the most.
> 
> I can't stand seeing relaxed/texlaxed girls on Youtube do their length checks by pulling, tugging, and stretching their hair all the way down to say their hair reaches a certain point. Okay maybe there's some shrinkage due to having new growth or the hair not being completely straight but your hair isn't naturally going to fall all the way to the point you're stretching your hair up to anyway. I honestly find all the extra pulling looks so silly.



You should tell her what you're thinking because she's being extremely rude and nasty.

Oh, and change "are/were jealous" to "are jealous." With comments like that, they're definitely jealous--and/or nasty beyond belief.


----------



## Blessed&higlyflavoured (Aug 19, 2013)

I find myself getting jealous of little girls hair. Its beautiful and thick. If i didn't look like a five year old, I would do all the little girl hairstyles. Bobbles, too many hair clips, the works. Reminds me of my yoof. 

Nostalgia aside. Some products that worked for me as a child are a no-go as an adult. They stink of the nineties. looking at you s-curl


----------



## naija24 (Aug 19, 2013)

here's a hair confession: i'm afraid if i ever wear weaves, people will think i'm ghetto.


----------



## oneastrocurlie (Aug 19, 2013)

I think some of the growth photos I see on instagram are fake. But it's probably me jealous because my hair grows sooooo slow. At least to me it does.


----------



## brownb83 (Aug 19, 2013)

I love taking my hair down at the gym after working out. 

Because I want people to know my hair is real


----------



## SmilingElephant (Aug 19, 2013)

Healthb4Length said:


> I feel that there's a unnecessary divide between type 4 and 3 naturals. I feel that a lot of type 4s do give type 3s a hard time and don't take their hair struggles into consideration. I've been seeing it lately on lots if hair boards and I'm baffled.
> 
> Type 3s there are a lot of blogs and hair boards that address your needs. Naturallycurly.com comes to mind, also curlynikki.com and there are a whole bunch of products specifically marketed for type 3s. Us 4s are just getting our due in the past 2-4 years or so.
> 
> ...



This whole post all day! Personally i have seen more videos with ppl that have really long type 4 hair than i do type 3. And it irks me when im looking for a video with my hair type and they say they're type 3 when they're really a type 4  there's styles that type 4s can do that my hair just cannot do. My hair is not as versatile as a type 4....so besides numerous wash n go videos...idk how else to really style my hair  

Btw MileHighDiva i LOVE 1Ballerina! Another one i like is HeyFranHey and SummerKellesy and JadoreMyCurls who's as close as I've seen with my hair!


----------



## growbaby (Aug 19, 2013)

I hate wearing my hair straightened bcuz I'm not satisfied with my length. 

I've never NOT had a few broken hairs on my hands after moisturizing and sealing

My crown area roots dread up something fierce if I don't detangle weekly.


----------



## MileHighDiva (Aug 19, 2013)

MileHighDiva said:


> SmilingElephant, you can follow this YouTuber, she has a loose curl pattern. If I think of anyone else, I'll let you know.  https://www.youtube.com/user/SunKissAlba and Shameless Maya
> 
> Please remember your hair is like a finger print, nobody's is the same.  In addition, forget your IRL cast of characters, you have support here. HTH!
> 
> ...



SmilingElephant, you should check these people out as well.


----------



## EnExitStageLeft (Aug 19, 2013)

Some of my coworkers always comment on the length of my hair. One always ask how long it is because I never wear it down. Truth be told I sort of want to continue to do so until I'm WL, but I don't have that type of patience. Shawty like to swang' .


----------



## SmilingElephant (Aug 19, 2013)

MileHighDiva said:


> SmilingElephant, you should check these people out as well.



I love Shameless Maya...she cut all her hair off so i have to watch her old videos for style ideas.  She was wearing this style where she pinned her hair to the side...for the life of me i cannot figure out how she did it! She used a lot of the same products as me. I was so excited that i found another youtuber with hair similar to mine ( im not trying to find an exact match...but something close...and irl i know no one)...but then she freakin shaves her head!!! lol! Y ppl gotta make freakin statements all the time!?  SunkissAlba is another one...i like her finger curls...i wish i could find someone that knew how to do some intricate styles and updos like how the 4s do....im having an afro breakdown!


----------



## Killahkurlz (Aug 20, 2013)

naija24 said:


> here's a hair confession: i'm afraid if i ever wear weaves, people will think i'm ghetto.



Lmbooooo. Im dead!!!


----------



## wavezncurlz (Aug 20, 2013)

I wish my hair was thicker - it broke combs when I was younger. I wish it were less wavy. 
. I have dd who is my hair twin. She leaves the house w shiny smooth hair and comes home looking hot mess. It is a brownish reddish color this summer and really looks dry even when it's not.  Styles slip right out of her hair. We get split ends easily. It isn't really long though people expect it to be because of her texture. 

Now dd2 has thick, jet black sheeny 4a hair. It is a bear to do but styles last for days. Her hair looks best after about a week. It seems so much stronger too. No splits. Long when stretched. 

I always hear people on this board wishing for 3 hair. I want more texture, smaller curls, 4 hair. The grass is always greener....


----------



## MileHighDiva (Aug 20, 2013)

wavezncurlz, I need step by step directions for that bun.  Are those pin curls?  The bun is so pretty!


----------



## Killahkurlz (Aug 20, 2013)

wavezncurlz said:


> I wish my hair was thicker - it broke combs when I was younger. I wish it were less wavy.
> . I have dd who is my hair twin. She leaves the house w shiny smooth hair and comes home looking hot mess. It is a brownish reddish color this summer and really looks dry even when it's not.  Styles slip right out of her hair. We get split ends easily. It isn't really long though people expect it to be because of her texture.
> 
> Now dd2 has thick, jet black sheeny 4a hair. It is a bear to do but styles last for days. Her hair looks best after about a week. It seems so much stronger too. No splits. Long when stretched.
> ...



I have a mixture of both and let me tell u, my type 4 is waaaaay easier to manage than my type 3 sections.  With the t3, it gets a different kind of tangled, a.nasty kind of.tangled. the t4 sections, not so much.


----------



## Healthb4Length (Aug 20, 2013)

To this day I still hate giving hair advice to people! Either you gonna take it and try to make it work for you or quit asking me the same thing over and over. My bad that my "nappy" hair has grown and you're "good stuff" has remained the same length for the past 3 years. Not my fault, I even printed and laminated a quick and simple guide for this ***** lol.  Sorry I'm outta advice. 

On a positive note I love that my Afro Is getting massive and I can do so much more now that my hair is long-ish


----------



## Britt (Aug 20, 2013)

Since I've been transitioning, well at least taking it day by day so far w/o a relaxer I'v been doing so much research on natural hair. I'm a little anxious b/c I don't quite know what to expect athough a huge part of me thinks I'll love my hair. I guess it's the journey that really kinda makes me impatient. I'm only 22 weeks post relaxer and that is truly just the beginning stages of things. I keep looking at naturals who have a good 2 years of growth but it will take a long time for me to get there. It's the unknown, the journey and tried patience that can be discouraging. I'm a person with the habit of wanting to know everything and likes no surprises but this transition is the total opposite of that. It's like I just want to have long fluffy healthy natural hair overnight. It will take a good years to reach where I want to reach. One thing this is teaching me is patience and acceptance.


----------



## melahnee (Aug 20, 2013)

Aireen said:


> When people touch my hair, I always worry that it isn't soft enough.
> 
> I know two of the black friends I have are/were jealous of my hair. One of them I see regularly always has to look or comment about it which is both a good and bad thing. A month ago I relaxed my hair and met up with a friend a day or two later, first thing she says when she sees me in a particularly rude tone is "Your hair looks very flat today." Later on in the day when I put my hair up she says, "This is the first  time I've seen your hair up!" so I continue by adding that I was  thinking of doing it but didn't bother. Her reply then is, "You should have." Honestly I know this is mean but I couldn't help but think _"My hair is going to look flat for a few days until I wash it but your hair seems like it's in a permanently damaged state."_  *Sorry, but I'm tired of people with damaged hair saying the most.*
> 
> I can't stand seeing relaxed/texlaxed girls on Youtube do their length checks by pulling, tugging, and stretching their hair all the way down to say their hair reaches a certain point. Okay maybe there's some shrinkage due to having new growth or the hair not being completely straight but your hair isn't naturally going to fall all the way to the point you're stretching your hair up to anyway. I honestly find all the extra pulling looks so silly.





omg what a B. i'm sorry you have to deal with that The bolded is my life. i swear people always have somethin to say like we give a FU**!! 
lol, like nice hair inspiration you are with your twigs  or your type 1 hair that is holdin on for dear life..don't even wanna think about what you'd do with my hair on your head..


----------



## Blessed&higlyflavoured (Aug 20, 2013)

Confession:

I'd say 30% of my drive regarding my career is so I can afford better products. That and earn more money than my sister.


----------



## natura87 (Aug 20, 2013)

growbaby said:


> *I hate wearing my hair straightened bcuz I'm not satisfied with my length. *
> 
> I've never NOT had a few broken hairs on my hands after moisturizing and sealing
> 
> ...


----------



## whiteoleander91 (Aug 20, 2013)

Brittster said:


> Since I've been transitioning, well at least taking it day by day so far w/o a relaxer I'v been doing so much research on natural hair. I'm a little anxious b/c I don't quite know what to expect athough a huge part of me thinks I'll love my hair. I guess it's the journey that really kinda makes me impatient. I'm only 22 weeks post relaxer and that is truly just the beginning stages of things. I keep looking at naturals who have a good 2 years of growth but it will take a long time for me to get there. It's the unknown, the journey and tried patience that can be discouraging. I'm a person with the habit of wanting to know everything and likes no surprises but this transition is the total opposite of that. It's like I just want to have long fluffy healthy natural hair overnight. It will take a good years to reach where I want to reach. One thing this is teaching me is patience and acceptance.



Brittster I know transitioning can be hard mentally. Transitioning made me appreciate every single inch of hair growth b/c it was tough seeing ladies with heads full of long natural hair when I had barely started growing my own. Even still--and I know can't speak for every person who has ever transitioned to natural hair--it has been _so_ worth it. I am so glad that I stuck with it. I'm glad that I at least gave my natural hair a chance. Hang in there!


----------



## Britt (Aug 20, 2013)

awww thanks whiteolender91, there are days when I think of just getting a perm and I'm not even far along. I know deep down it will be worth it to keep pushing along. Thanks for the words of encouragement. Your bun in your siggy is beautiful!


----------



## wavezncurlz (Aug 20, 2013)

MileHighDiva said:


> @wavezncurlz, I need step by step directions for that bun. Are those pin curls? The bun is so pretty!


 
Thanks MileHighDiva

This 3 or 4 long twists rolled into bun. I think it looks better on our hair because we have more texture. I've seen it done with added hair too'

check out these videos :

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zn1ZkHUUPOk
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zEkaDI3L8nQ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I57f-_ZJTmk


----------



## spellinto (Aug 20, 2013)

sylver2 said:


> right now i feel that i don't want to ever go natural....



Me neither. I've achieved so much with relaxed hair that I really can't imagine starting all over with natural hair.  Plus I really love how straight/wavy hair looks on me...I don't think I'd look as good with a TWA as I do with TBL relaxed hair. Oh well  To each his own!


----------



## Extremus (Aug 23, 2013)

I'm going to be the biggest hypocrite once I get my sew in  I was sooo anti-weaves and I went so hard on my friends that wore them.  But I'm so stoked to get my first install 

With that being said, this is my biggest fear:



naija24 said:


> i'm afraid if i ever wear weaves, people will think i'm ghetto.







growbaby said:


> I hate wearing my hair straightened bcuz I'm not satisfied with my length.



 I thought I was the only one who felt like this. Especially going from BSL to APL. 



growbaby said:


> I've never NOT had a few broken hairs on my hands after moisturizing and sealing



I'm so glad I'm not the only one. It's been this way since my setback. I see you have long hair, so there's no need to fear too much I hope.


----------



## ilong (Aug 25, 2013)

Real Confession:

I feel that I've lost years of having gorgeious long natural hair by not researching the existence LHCF and others.

I want my "bare" spots to be have grown in with new growth by next year

I want to take my wig (PS) off and my hair be BSL or MBL - TOMORROW!!! 

I am getting overly anxious to meet my 2014 Steppin Out" goal of BSL/MBL

I want my hair to grow long enough ..

... to wear my hair straightened and wear it out so folks will be like "say what???"

... to go skating and dancing, do some turns/spins and have my hair "all up in somebody's face"

... so that a wash n' go/braidout/twist out is SL

...so people think I have my wig on or weave in

... to cover my SO's chest


----------



## NaiyaAi (Aug 25, 2013)

I hate when I encounter someone who's natural talking about hair problems and I give them a suggestion that I learned from stalking the natural threads here on LHCF and then I get the side eye just because I'm relaxed.

I also hate when people ask me when I'm going natural because as of right now, my answer is "never." I don't have anything against going natural, but I could never BC and there's no way I could transition and retain ALL of my length so that's why I could never do it. I worked hard to make BSL and I'm holding onto my length for as long as possible. But people don't want to hear that. They just hear "Oh, I'm probably never going natural" and assume I hate everything about natural hair which is the farthest thing from the truth. 

I used to love coming home from school, but now I hate it because my family is always making comments about my hair and it makes me feel embarrassed about my own hair. Nevermind that I have the longest hair in my family. The slightest bit of visible new growth and it's "you need a touchup." Or if I don't gel down my edges, which I don't like to do so I don't get product buildup, it's "Are you gonna go outside looking like that?" It's just so frustrating, because they don't understand that part of being on a HHJ means that making my hair fit their standards of "presentability" would mean breakage for me.


----------



## whiteoleander91 (Aug 26, 2013)

Brittster said:


> awww thanks whiteolender91, there are days when I think of just getting a perm and I'm not even far along. I know deep down it will be worth it to keep pushing along. Thanks for the words of encouragement. Your bun in your siggy is beautiful!



Brittster I'm just now seeing this, thank you for the lovely compliment! And no problem :3


----------



## Blessed&higlyflavoured (Nov 4, 2013)

***bump***


----------



## brownb83 (May 26, 2014)

I am retaining length and I dont sleep with a scarf on twice a week.


----------



## Saludable84 (May 26, 2014)

I barely m&s these days.


----------



## teysmith (May 26, 2014)

I never wrap my hair up with a scarf at night.  I rarely use a leave in moisturizer. I don't trim my ends as needed.


----------



## atlien11 (May 26, 2014)

I am natural and i am finally getting the hang of doing my hair just how i like it (big and curly  ). While this looks really cute in sundresses, jeans+tanks, etc. I have a client in Manhattan located in the heart of the most extreme professional environments of nyc. Women who work here wear power suits every day of the week (yes these places still exist). 

I have to be there for two weeks and i dont know how to make my hair look "professional". I still think white people have a complex about women who wear their hair natural in these settings. 
 - I want to straighten it but i don't want to mess with my curl pattern. 
 - I thought about getting weave but thats a lot of work for two weeks
 - Maybe i can put it in a bun (boring but do-able)
 - Maybe i should just get over it and wear my curly length with a suit 
 - wigs...ehh....too much hair in a suit is a fail

I dunno...


----------



## mz.rae (May 26, 2014)

I getting so disgusted with my natural hair right now!  It's to the point I'm starting to resent it and other natural hair. Weird I know. I've been eyeing relaxers and my old hairdressers website to schedule a virgin relaxer. But I know this too shall pass and it will be worth it in the end... hopefully... I've only been fully natural 6 months after a one in a half year transition.  I think I'm looking back at my relaxed days with rose colored glasses, because there were times where I had gotten fed up with being relaxed as well.


----------



## Destiny9109 (May 27, 2014)

I'm currently(and for most of my hhj) use direct heat once a week. The way I figure it is, before my hhj I used direct heat at least 5x a week(highschool) without taking care of it(washed maybe once a month, never used conditioner, leave in, brushed with bristle brush wet)....it was long and thrived. 

Now that I'm taking good care of it(protein treatments, dc once or twice a week, using heat protectant, quality products, m&s) I don't see the harm in using heat ONCE weekly compared to 5x  week with bad hair care practices.

And besides, I don't have time to spend so much money and STILL look a mess lol.


----------



## PinkSunshine77 (May 27, 2014)

I sadly don't have any hair confessions. I dare not ever do half of these things though or I'd end up bald.


----------



## Straighthoodtea (May 27, 2014)

I broke my no heat challenge and flat ironed my hair because a boy said he liked straight hair.....I feel bad. Especially since this boy doesn't even like me.


----------



## Straighthoodtea (May 27, 2014)

mz.rae said:


> I getting so disgusted with my natural hair right now!  It's to the point I'm starting to resent it and other natural hair. Weird I know. I've been eyeing relaxers and my old hairdressers website to schedule a virgin relaxer. But I know this too shall pass and it will be worth it in the end... hopefully... I've only been fully natural 6 months after a one in a half year transition.  I think I'm looking back at my relaxed days with rose colored glasses, because there were times where I had gotten fed up with being relaxed as well.



Why are you fed up? We're about the same on transitioning and being fully natural. Im 7-8 months fully natural too  I get frustrated sometimes because I dont know what to do with my hair outside of wash n gos xD


----------



## mz.rae (May 27, 2014)

Straighthoodtea said:


> Why are you fed up? We're about the same on transitioning and being fully natural. Im 7-8 months fully natural too  I get frustrated sometimes because I dont know what to do with my hair outside of wash n gos xD



I think it's because nothing I seem to do seems to work. Like I just feel like all my hair does is break off and stay the same length. I've tried braid outs which don't really look good on my hair. I just mastered twist outs but they take a long time to put in. I do like wash and goes, and right now I've been heat styling to reduce tangles. I'm just not sure if I'm going to make it to BSL by the end of summer.


----------



## Willow00 (May 27, 2014)

I spend the least amount of money and personal time on my hair, yet growing and caring for my hair has always been on the top of my to do list. I want it long and healthy but i don't. feel like doing fudge to it...oh the irony.


----------



## bronzephoenix (May 28, 2014)

I always feel shy & embarrassed when people compliment my hair. I think I have such an intimate relationship with my hair, I forget that others can see it. 

At MBL, I was too humble to whip my hair around (publicly). I would feel really uncomfortable & almost guilty when other black women would stare. 

I always get stuck when people ask what I use on my hair or how I styled it. That feels way too personal. 

I hate the term "good hair".

Sent from my iPhone using LHCF


----------



## GettingKinky (Aug 1, 2014)

I admit I was feeling petty today but here goes. 

I was at the grocery store with my hair in its typical bun. I kept seeing women wearing weave and every time I passed one I kept wishing my hair was out so that they could see that my own hair is longer than their weave.


----------



## Prettymetty (Aug 1, 2014)

I only dc at the salon right before my blowout. At home I condition my hair with vo5. 

I don't use a leave in after I shampoo and condition. I just put a little oil on my ends.

My hair is always pulled up in a bun, updo or hidden under a wig. This is not to protect my ends...I am not happy with my length yet. 

If I had to choose between losing my baby weight within a year or retaining all my growth in a year, I would choose the weight loss. Health before length


----------



## SunRai Naturals (Aug 3, 2014)

I feel like I have the most difficult hair. It's tangly from root to tip, very hard to moisturize, very fine strands, yet very very coarse. My hair is just like Marley hair & not the soft kind. I'm on a journey to hip length & possibly beyond but today after taking my hair out of braids I realized that I'm not enjoying this anymore. 
I want to be able to see my length w/out feeling like it's a fight. Lol. Beyond that I just want to live a little outside of PS'ing.
After 14 years natural I actually thought about getting a relaxer.


----------



## girlonfire (Aug 3, 2014)

I always say I wanna dye my hair, I wanna cut my hair really short, I want locs, etc., for a change. 
My confession is: I am deathly afraid of doing anything permanent or semi permanent to my hair at the risk of not liking it a week later and hating myself for going through with it.


----------



## SunRai Naturals (Aug 4, 2014)

SunRai Naturals said:


> I feel like I have the most difficult hair. It's tangly from root to tip, very hard to moisturize, very fine strands, yet very very coarse. My hair is just like Marley hair & not the soft kind. I'm on a journey to hip length & possibly beyond but today after taking my hair out of braids I realized that I'm not enjoying this anymore.
> I want to be able to see my length w/out feeling like it's a fight. Lol. Beyond that I just want to live a little outside of PS'ing.
> After 14 years natural I actually thought about getting a relaxer.



I was just having a moment it seems. Lol! I just needed to L.O.C. & baggy. After that my hair was a lot better. I have my hair in a braided ponytail protective style & I like it.


----------



## PinkSunshine77 (Aug 4, 2014)

My hair pissed me off last night and for a split second I wished it was a different texture. I confess


----------



## havilland (Aug 4, 2014)

I want to get a waist length weave just to see what's it is like to have hair that long. 

#shortcuts!


----------



## naija24 (Aug 6, 2014)

SL to APL is the hardest part of the HHJ.


----------



## LadyRaider (Aug 6, 2014)

I'm really out of it and didn't know that everyone else was wearing fake hair. I think I realized it finally in 2010 when it was an hot, humid early morning and I was rushing to catch a shuttle at UT. I was a mess, hair just pulled back, but I get on the bus and the bus driver is a black woman with long perfectly styled hair down her back. 

That's when I knew. It didn't make sense that a bus driver would spend hours in the early morning getting her hair perfect like that. In the summer heat? Not a bit of frizz? 

And why was it when I was little, the other black girls would pull my hair because I had shoulder length braids and none of them did. And now all of a sudden EVERYONE has hair to their waist? 

To finally push me over the edge, I was talking to my aunt just this month and she said "neither of my girls wear their real hair." What??? I thought my family DID all have long flowing hair?!?!?


----------



## missjones (Aug 6, 2014)

I think I'm a natural hair abuser. I don't moisturize and detangle like I should.

I want my hair to be longer because I think it will be easier to style.


----------



## MicheePrings (Aug 6, 2014)

Confession: I flirt with the idea of straight hair, ( relaxed hair) just  show off my length for a while. I have 15 to 17 inches of hair which shrinks up above my shoulders. The process of flat ironing takes so much prep and planning for my hair (sigh)  

Eta. I think that maybe if I  find a way to master roller setting so I can get over this straight hair fantasy

Sent from my iPhone using LHCF


----------



## atlien11 (Aug 6, 2014)

confession: I think the Shea Moisture line sucks. There i said it.


----------



## naija24 (Aug 6, 2014)

Another one, but it makes me feel pretty guilty.

I get really annoyed when anyone above a 3b wants to rant and compare their hair journey to someone with 4z hair.


----------



## SweetlyCurly (Aug 6, 2014)

I've been thinking about coloring s my hair but I'm deadly afraid it'll mess my curl pattern


----------



## Lilmama1011 (Aug 6, 2014)

LadyRaider said:


> I'm really out of it and didn't know that everyone else was wearing fake hair. I think I realized it finally in 2010 when it was an hot, humid early morning and I was rushing to catch a shuttle at UT. I was a mess, hair just pulled back, but I get on the bus and the bus driver is a black woman with long perfectly styled hair down her back.
> 
> That's when I knew. It didn't make sense that a bus driver would spend hours in the early morning getting her hair perfect like that. In the summer heat? Not a bit of frizz?
> 
> ...



I'm sorry but lol. Yeah I have never worn weave and it's true when it gets muggy or rainy in general,  real hair looks a mess but their weaves be laid.  But idc because mine is real and I like hair coming out the scalp not weave in,threaded in and however else they do it : look:


----------



## Lilmama1011 (Aug 6, 2014)

I want my hair a lot longer but if it takes forever on  wash day at hair a little pass apl , how long will it take at waist length?! Lol


----------



## havilland (Aug 6, 2014)

atlien11 said:


> confession: I think the Shea Moisture line sucks. There i said it.



ITA^^^^^^^^^


----------



## Saludable84 (Aug 6, 2014)

Lilmama1011 said:


> I want my hair a lot longer but if it takes forever on  wash day at hair a little pass apl , how long will it take at waist length?! Lol



A lot longer. My wash day is 3 hours best and I'm MBL.


----------



## frizzy (Aug 6, 2014)

Confession:

I flat ironed my hair 3 times in the last 4 weeks @370 degrees, up from 300 when I was fully relaxed.


----------



## LadyBugsy (Aug 6, 2014)

I am already tired of my new weave install. I get compliments everyday but I want braids.


----------



## CenteredGirl (Aug 6, 2014)

After many years of trying to grow my natural 4Z hair, I am making great headway.  Now I know the meaning of "listen to your hair".


----------



## Healthb4Length (Aug 6, 2014)

I've been stuck between APL and BSL for 2 years.  In getting frustrated. I think I wanna just shave it all off and start over again.


----------



## oneastrocurlie (Aug 7, 2014)

I've been to three different CVS stores looking for that new jbco Shea moisture line. No luck. And I'm done looking. If the three closest to home and work don't have it I'm not trying to drive out the way to get it. Even the ratchet CVS with security guard didn't have it. 

OAN: They did carry black opal and black Radiance makeup. I've got a $5 cvs reward and $4 off $12 cosmetics coupon. Probably go back to use that.


----------



## atlien11 (Aug 7, 2014)

cwmarie -- Dang CVS got security guards now? Shyt just got real.


----------



## BranwenRosewood (Aug 7, 2014)

I don't like weave because I think it makes the people who wear it look generic.


----------



## Fenaxa (Aug 7, 2014)

My confessions:
I might've gotten fed up and ripped a few large size knots out of my hair while "detangling" just like I used to do when I had relaxed hair. I always told myself that "I'd never do that again" after I went natural but while my hair changed, my patience stayed the same lol.

I frequently reminisce about having a fade. I want to jump in a pool/shower/lake whatever and not worry about having my hair in twists or what kind of muscles are in my neck straining to hold the weight of my soaked hair up..

I feel kinda bad that I didn't actually rock my bald head when I had it. I'm tempted to shave at least some of my hair down and just keep it faded.

It irritates me to NO END when someone gets mad that you're even talking about cutting your hair. It's just hair. I do understand though but I feel like its better to keep those anti-cutting sentiments to themselves ; unless you're a unicorn, those tears will not make my hair grow back any faster. 

Lastly, I love weave hair. I don't wear weaves but secretly.. I want to, just to see what it's like. I assume it's like a wig but you don't have to worry about it falling off!


----------



## Saludable84 (Aug 7, 2014)

I want to shave my head. Not to be natural or rock a short style. No. I'm just hair lazy


----------



## Honey Bee (Aug 7, 2014)

atlien11 said:


> Dang CVS got security guards now? Shyt just got real.



atlien11, Girl, yes! The ones over here lock up the deodorant, too.


----------



## nelcoy (Aug 7, 2014)

My hair is bsl and it is so overwhelming at this length. 

I look at yt videos of girls doing all these natural styles and I get irritated because that style takes hours/days for me to complete. So I just put my Celie braids back in and throw a wig on.


----------



## oneastrocurlie (Aug 7, 2014)

atlien11 said:


> cwmarie -- Dang CVS got security guards now? Shyt just got real.



I was a bit surprised... Kinda. He didn't look like he was going to stop a thing from happening lol 



Honey Bee said:


> atlien11, Girl, yes! The ones over here lock up the deodorant, too.



Folks gotta stay fresh. By any means necessary!


----------



## atlien11 (Aug 7, 2014)

Honey Bee cwmarie 

smmfh -->


----------



## CurliDiva (Aug 7, 2014)

I've being watching yt videos and been stalking the "self relax" thread because I'm not retaining length as a long term natural and a longtime lhcf member. 

I've doing all the right stuff - protective styling, weekly DCs, protein/moisture balance and my natural hair has not flourished. I'm so envious of folks that do the big chop and then 16 months later their hair is BSL!


----------



## hairqueenny (Aug 7, 2014)

I get anxiety when it's time to take my weave out and fear all my hair will be gone.

Sometimes I fantasize about getting a relaxer again.

I often think about moving because I still can't find a good and reasonable stylist in NY.

My husband thinks I'm obsessed with hair lol.


----------



## newnyer (Aug 7, 2014)

LadyBugsy said:


> I am already tired of my new weave install. I get compliments everyday but I want braids.



I'm completely opposite. I just got braids, get compliments,  but still want to take this out and get a weave right now.


----------



## Saludable84 (Aug 7, 2014)

hairqueenny said:


> I get anxiety when it's time to take my weave out and fear all my hair will be gone.
> 
> Sometimes I fantasize about getting a relaxer again.
> 
> ...


 
Are you in the downstate (5 boros) area?


----------



## LadyBugsy (Aug 7, 2014)

newnyer said:


> I'm completely opposite. I just got braids, get compliments,  but still want to take this out and get a weave right now.



What type of braids newnyer? I am thinking about getting long box braids


----------



## Lilmama1011 (Aug 7, 2014)

BranwenRosewood said:


> I don't like weave because I think it makes the people who wear it look generic.



Also it's what most think black women wear anyway.  My thing is at least maintain your real hair,  the most I have seen had raggedy hair


----------



## Evolving78 (Aug 8, 2014)

i used ecostyler clear gel super hold and pump it up spray last weekend... it was a one time deal.  the gel wasn't so bad, but that spray is the devil.


----------



## Evolving78 (Aug 8, 2014)

brownb83 said:


> I am retaining length and I dont sleep with a scarf on twice a week.



and i use heat weekly.


----------



## brownb83 (Aug 8, 2014)

I want pretty flowly hair every day.


----------



## Lilmama1011 (Aug 8, 2014)

I wish I could sleep with a satin pillow only to look cute but my hair is dry just from taking a nap on the satin pillow. I think it's the environment itself drying it out when I'm sleep.  Even though I get up and moisturize anyway I just can't commit to it


----------



## KinkyRN (Aug 8, 2014)

I'm tired of waiting on my hair to grow. I will start wearing wigs next week.


----------



## GettingKinky (Aug 8, 2014)

In my brain I know that all healthy hair is good hair. But today the BW checker at the grocery store had smooth, shiny, wavy, curly hair and I wanted to take it off her head and put it on mine. I hate what the dominant culture has done to my perception of beautiful hair.


----------



## missyrayne19 (Aug 8, 2014)

I really want to change up my styles via color and a haircut but am sure I'd throw myself into shock the next day once the newness of it all wore off. 

Speaking of color, I REALLY want to go lighter but have never, ever dyed my hair and have no idea how my hair would react being double processed (relaxer and color). So I just stick with what I gots and daydream. That and stalk other women on YT and hair blogs to get my color bug fix 

I've been eyeing different wigs to change up my usual protective style but I simply cannot justify spending a boat load of money on just one wig just so I can look 'cute'. Many, perhaps, but one? Nah son. If the hair ain't growin' from my head, I ain't spendin' a crap ton of money on it. My conscience won't let me 

Sometimes I wish I didn't have to do so much to my hair to keep it healthy. DC, protective styles, silk scarf, heat usage, etc. Don't get me wrong, I love my hair and fully embrace my texture, but sheesh, it'd be nice sometimes to literally grab some 'poo, wash, then slap some conditioner on my hair (all in the shower mind you) and then get out and go on my business. No detangling, no leave ins, no fifty hours and a day styling, just... go.


----------



## D.Lisha (Aug 9, 2014)

missyrayne19 said:


> I really want to change up my styles via color and a haircut but am sure I'd throw myself into shock the next day once the newness of it all wore off.  Speaking of color, I REALLY want to go lighter but have never, ever dyed my hair and have no idea how my hair would react being double processed (relaxer and color). So I just stick with what I gots and daydream. That and stalk other women on YT and hair blogs to get my color bug fix   I've been eyeing different wigs to change up my usual protective style but I simply cannot justify spending a boat load of money on just one wig just so I can look 'cute'. Many, perhaps, but one? Nah son. If the hair ain't growin' from my head, I ain't spendin' a crap ton of money on it. My conscience won't let me   Sometimes I wish I didn't have to do so much to my hair to keep it healthy. DC, protective styles, silk scarf, heat usage, etc. Don't get me wrong, I love my hair and fully embrace my texture, but sheesh, it'd be nice sometimes to literally grab some 'poo, wash, then slap some conditioner on my hair (all in the shower mind you) and then get out and go on my business. No detangling, no leave ins, no fifty hours and a day styling, just... go.



missyrayne: Girl I feel you!  I sit back and think about all that it takes to maintain our healthy hair, and it really blows me. From the hour detangling sessions, to having to jump in the shower to 'poo wash; jump out to apply DC and let it sit; THEN hop back in the shower (either the same day or the day after) just to rinse out the DC; then apply leave-ins just to prep the hair for airdrying? Ugh! There's got to be a better way!

Meanwhile....most Caucasians/Asians/Brazilian...etc races usually have WL hair that they grew effortlessly without the fuss that Afro textured ladies have to deal with.

Sent from my iPhone using LHCF


----------



## missyrayne19 (Aug 9, 2014)

D.Lisha said:


> missyrayne: Girl I feel you!  I sit back and think about all that it takes to maintain our healthy hair, and it really blows me. From the hour detangling sessions, to having to jump in the shower to 'poo wash; jump out to apply DC and let it sit; THEN hop back in the shower (either the same day or the day after) just to rinse out the DC; then apply leave-ins just to prep the hair for airdrying? Ugh! There's got to be a better way!
> 
> Meanwhile....most Caucasians/Asians/Brazilian...etc races usually have WL hair that they grew effortlessly without the fuss that Afro textured ladies have to deal with.
> 
> Sent from my iPhone using LHCF



D.Lisha I know right?! I look at my non black friends and how they straight up ABUSE their hair yet if I so much as THINK about skipping a DC session or ignoring my silk scarf for a night, my hair will turn into breakage city. Ugh. It's annoying sometimes haha


----------



## KinkyRN (Aug 9, 2014)

But with all the tanning and hair abuse they will be bald and looking like old leather. While our age will look like it stopped at 50 and we have huge white afros!!


----------



## Lilmama1011 (Aug 9, 2014)

KinkyRN said:


> But with all the tanning and hair abuse they will be bald and looking like old leather. While our age will look like it stopped at 50 and we have huge white afros!!



White afros?!!!Oh never mind lol


----------



## KinkyRN (Aug 10, 2014)

You know cuz we'll be old!


----------



## Angelbean (Sep 20, 2014)

If detangling for me took more then 30 minutes say an hours like some naturals say it takes them then I would just be a heat trained natural or would just relax....I am not impatient but I ain't got time for that lol


----------



## brownb83 (Sep 20, 2014)

Its unrealistic but I want the hair that grows out my head to look perfect allll the time. 

Sigh


----------



## Bun Mistress (Sep 20, 2014)

I'm have been in a sew in all year and even though I'm sick of it, I really can't go back to daily twisting and bunning.  Team Lazy.


----------



## PJaye (Sep 20, 2014)

I ain't giving up my old school Goody brush for nobody!


----------



## FollicleFanatic (Jan 7, 2015)

Sometimes I go to my product stash and mentally check off how long it will take me to use them up and what styles I can use them for.

When I buy new products I like to spread them out like they're my spoils of war and sniff them in anticipation of using. Is that weird lol.


----------



## Lilmama1011 (Jan 7, 2015)

FollicleFanatic said:


> Sometimes I go to my product stash and mentally check off how long it will take me to use them up and what styles I can use them for.
> 
> When I buy new products I like to spread them out like they're my spoils of war and sniff them in anticipation of using. Is that weird lol.



Yes


----------



## Lilmama1011 (Jan 7, 2015)

..........


----------



## Prettymetty (Jan 7, 2015)

Sometimes I wish I had strands of steel. We have the most fragile hair type and that is a big disadvantage when it comes to growing long hair.

When I was a kid I would drape a towel over my head and pretend it was hair 

I spend more on hair than on clothes (salon visits with tip, products, accessories).

My exes hair was longer than mine and I was low key hating 

I don't discuss hair with people irl, because they probably wouldn't listen. Most of the girls I know have chewed up hair underneath butt length bundles.


----------



## FollicleFanatic (Jan 7, 2015)

^ Girl I used to be swinging that towel around like a diva lol. 

Sometimes I feel low key jealous when I'm having a bad hair day and see someone with thick curly lusciousness. If I see a track or a tectonic shift from a scratch I'm like yessss


----------



## AmethystLily (Jan 8, 2015)

I have felt jealous when I saw men with longer hair than mine.


----------



## xu93texas (Jan 8, 2015)

FollicleFanatic said:


> Sometimes I go to my product stash and mentally check off how long it will take me to use them up and what styles I can use them for.  When I buy new products I like to spread them out like they're my spoils of war and sniff them in anticipation of using. Is that weird lol.



Omg!! I do this, too


----------



## GGsKin (Jan 8, 2015)

FollicleFanatic said:


> ^ Girl I used to be swinging that towel around like a diva lol.
> 
> Sometimes I feel low key jealous when I'm having a bad hair day and see someone with thick curly lusciousness. If I see a track or a tectonic shift from a scratch I'm like yessss




A towel or whatever else would work lol. My cousin and I would put Bermuda shorts on our heads. Oh how I loved those shorts for the elastic waistband. Kept that 'hair' on secure


----------



## brownb83 (Jan 8, 2015)

A major reason I want long hair is to prove to people that black women can.


----------



## Rocky91 (Jan 8, 2015)

brownb83 said:


> Its unrealistic but I want the hair that grows out my head to look perfect allll the time.  Sigh


This is why I need to keep my hair in weaves until I get to a comfortable length because I'm very much into styling.


----------



## ikandi87 (Jan 8, 2015)

Ive been abusing my hair for the past few months. The beautiful textures manageability ish got me missing my relaxed days. ..and my bf has been running his hands  thru it like crazy but he cant when I rock my puff. I almost feel bad for HIM bc once it washes out im going into ps mode extra hard!


----------



## FollicleFanatic (Jan 8, 2015)

brownb83 said:


> A major reason I want long hair is to prove to people that black women can.



^THIS!!! 

When I see someone flip their hair and glance at me like 'yeah I just did that, it's all mine what bishhh' I just smile and shake my head. You think you're doing something with those struggle wisps. Poor tink tink.


----------



## missyrayne19 (Jan 8, 2015)

brownb83 said:


> A major reason I want long hair is to prove to people that black women can.



Agreed. I'd like to add that also proving we can grow our hair to whatever lengths we choose, relaxed OR natural, so long as we practice healthy hair care practices too


----------



## cynd (Jan 9, 2015)

I realize you always want what you don't have, but I'm low key envious of my sisters because they all have thick, resilient strands while all the good hair practices in the world won't change the fact that my hair is thin, low density and prone to breakage. They also have great legs while the best thing about my skinny legs is that they work. WHYYYY??!!


----------



## Lilmama1011 (Jan 25, 2015)

I want to stop being afraid of flat irons and straighten it every once in a while but I fear damage and the splits that come with it. I feel like I never show my real length unless it's soak and wet and I take a pic every three months. Other than that my hair always has texture and never is really straight.


----------



## KinkyRN (Jan 25, 2015)

ikandi87 said:


> Ive been abusing my hair for the past few months. The beautiful textures manageability ish got me missing my relaxed days. ..and my bf has been running his hands  thru it like crazy but he cant when I rock my puff. I almost feel bad for HIM bc once it washes out im going into ps mode extra hard!


So you like the system? How did the application process go? What do you do for up keep? My daughter wants one so I'm getting as much info as possible! T.I.A

Sent from my iPhone 6 using LHCF


----------



## Blessed&higlyflavoured (Apr 18, 2015)

..


----------



## Lilmama1011 (Apr 18, 2015)

I'm craving straight hair.  Protective styles makes me feel like my hair isn't done.  I feel like if someone seen me and knew me for yeard, would say I fell off my game


----------



## L.Brown1114 (Apr 18, 2015)

I'm so mad at myself for bleaching my hair. Now I can't relax because my hair is barely making it from the bleach. I'm so tired of my natural hair. It stays dry and getting it straight is too much of a hassle. So instead of an Afro everyday or having to do my hair for HOURS before bed to do twist outs I'm staying in various braid styles for 2 years straight and then texlaxing the crap out of it.


----------



## ms.blue (Apr 19, 2015)

I have been natural for I think either 6 or 7 yrs and I had so much setbacks that I  no longer care about growing my hair long. I have been going back from apl to bsl for yrs and I'm just over it.  

I really want to relax my hair and cut into a short funky style.


----------



## CurlyMoo (Apr 19, 2015)

brownb83 said:


> A major reason I want long hair is to prove to people that black women can.



I started out this way and Tyra Banks is the one who jump started the fire.
However, now I just want long hair because it's beautiful.


----------



## PlainJane (Apr 19, 2015)

I wouldn't mind some heat damage...


----------



## Blessed&higlyflavoured (Apr 20, 2015)

I wish my hair was thick and dense. IDC about texture too much. If my hair was comb breaking thick I'd be super happy. Now that my hair is actually moisturised Its started clumping and my twists just dont look as thick.  thick full heavy dense jet black APL would make me so happy. Right now I have a thin piecey off brown different lengthed kind-of CBL length. so... we'll see. 

I don't believe in  natural products or kitchen products. Even though I'm natural I don't want my products to be. I want those laboratory proteins. When I read about people using eggs and yoghurt, juices and berries I just don't get it.  Nothing seals as well as grease and mineral oil and I don't get an allergic reaction to them.


----------



## sweetpea7 (Apr 20, 2015)

I love my hair but I wish it was more defined. I have loose wavy hair by my ears., springy coils in the middle and tighter waves at the top and I want people to be able to see all of it lol  I have a head full of frizz but at least its thick like nap85 thick.


----------



## Blessed&higlyflavoured (Apr 20, 2015)

sweetpea7 said:


> I love my hair but I wish it was more defined. I have loose wavy hair by my ears., springy coils in the middle and tighter waves at the top and I want people to be able to see all of it lol  I have a head full of frizz but at least its *thick like nap85 thick*.


 jelly


----------



## nothidden (Apr 20, 2015)

llan said:


> I wish my hair was thick and dense. IDC about texture too much. If my hair was comb breaking thick I'd be super happy. Now that my hair is actually moisturised Its started clumping and my twists just dont look as thick.  thick full heavy dense jet black APL would make me so happy. Right now I have a thin piecey off brown different lengthed kind-of CBL length. so... we'll see.
> 
> I don't believe in  natural products or kitchen products. Even though I'm natural I don't want my products to be. I want those laboratory proteins. When I read about people using eggs and yoghurt, juices and berries I just don't get it.  Nothing seals as well as grease and mineral oil and I don't get an allergic reaction to them.


I hear ya'.  When my hair is conditioned really, really well, the volume is gone, and I don't want to lose that.

"...yoghurt, juices and berries"...too darn funny!


----------



## SmilingElephant (Apr 20, 2015)

I wish my hair was about 5 to 6 inches longer already and I hate how my nape and sides shrink up and the top, crown part of my hair grows over it all so I feel kind of "mushroomy"

I'm thinking about once I reach hip lent stretched, I may get it cut...of course I'm researching on how to cut it myself bc I do NOT trust ANYBODY with my hair...especially with scissors. I don't think I ever could. 

I think if I cut some long bangs in the front, I'd feel better.


----------



## ag00 (Apr 20, 2015)

ms.blue said:


> I have been natural for I think either 6 or 7 yrs and I had so much setbacks that I  no longer care about growing my hair long. I have been going back from apl to bsl for yrs and I'm just over it.
> 
> I really want to relax my hair and cut into a short funky style.



Noooo just become a straight haired natural! Relaxing is not worth it. I promise you'll regret it. I only say this because I've been there and done it and had to start ALL OVER again.


----------



## ag00 (Apr 20, 2015)

PlainJane said:


> I wouldn't mind some heat damage...



Lol. I remember feeling that way. Anything to tame those damn naps.


----------



## ag00 (Apr 20, 2015)

llan said:


> I don't believe in  natural products or kitchen products. Even though I'm natural I don't want my products to be. I want those laboratory proteins. When I read about people using eggs and yoghurt, juices and berries I just don't get it.  Nothing seals as well as grease and mineral oil and I don't get an allergic reaction to them.



Same here. I tried the coconut milk and yogurt relaxer. Didn't do a damn thing for my hair as I should have guessed. It did mess up my carpet, sheets, and clothes. Never again. I'll be sticking to my grease. It never lets me down.


----------



## Lilmama1011 (Apr 20, 2015)

I miss wearing my hair straight all the time before the forum.  But I was getting my hair relaxed every 6 weeks which still didn't have an effect on my hair. It was still thick.  I remember flat ironing my hair every two weeks and it still was fine.  Now all of a sudden I have a fear of direct heat but crave straight hair and that's the only way to straighten my hair.  These protective style visually makes me not enjoy my hair and makes me feel it's not done. Idk what to do. SO told me to do what I use to then but he sounded sarcastic or I'm scared.  My hair was always thick,  just that lady over processing my hair made it snap off when I went to straighten


----------



## Aireen (Apr 21, 2015)

• I honestly love long hair and I'm grateful my hair is on the longer side. I think there's something really sexy and feminine about having longer strands; it gives me a huge confidence boost and getting compliments from it is a bonus.  I'm currently grazing WL but when I know for sure my hair has hit it, I'm probably going to make a thread to "celebrate" and talk about my setbacks, techniques, products I use, etc. I'll make a second thread when I reach around HL-TBL. 

• I've had 3 major setbacks (as well as many smaller ones) for various reasons and each time my hair has made it back to WL. I think that's why with the last one, I didn't fuss too much, I KNEW my hair would bounce back. 

• I really like washing my hair, it's very relaxing for me and I feel like with each wash I'm helping along with the health of my hair. I believe if you treat your hair with love and care, it'll reciprocate.

• When people tell me SL is long, my first thought is _"No, no it's not."_ I've always known SL to be super short hair so I don't get why some act like it's really long. 

• I keep telling myself this but I want to completely stop talking about hair irl, I think people know I have a mini obsession and I rather keep it online and just have them watch it grow. If people ask me questions, I'll spill a bit of tea. 

• I finally am able to mimic salon results at home with just a blow-drier and I feel like a freaking boss.


----------



## ChelleBelle (Apr 21, 2015)

I don't care for the wash/conditioning process. I feel as through I'm locked away all weekend missing out of life.


----------



## CluelessJL (Apr 23, 2015)

I really dislike how I look immediately after a relaxer. I feel like I've got an odd shaped head and my hair sits oddly around my hairline, and these things are emphasised when my hair is very flat...


----------



## movingforward (Apr 23, 2015)

ms.blue said:


> I have been natural for I think either 6 or 7 yrs and I had so much setbacks that I  no longer care about growing my hair long. I have been going back from apl to bsl for yrs and I'm just over it.
> 
> I really want to relax my hair and cut into a short funky style.



I did this back in October.  Now I'm transitioning back to natural.


----------



## CodeRed (Apr 23, 2015)

CluelessJL said:


> I really dislike how I look immediately after a relaxer.



I agree. I don't like my hair slicked down but it's fine after the first wash... it's funny because people really, really like it when it's that slicked down. I don't get it. I feel like I have a weird head too


----------



## SuchaLady (Apr 24, 2015)

I probably won't ever give up straight hair  If I grow out this relaxer for good it will get blown out every two weeks.


----------



## Aireen (Apr 24, 2015)

CluelessJL said:


> I really dislike how I look immediately after a relaxer. I feel like I've got an odd shaped head and my hair sits oddly around my hairline, and these things are emphasised when my hair is very flat...





CodeRed said:


> I agree. I don't like my hair slicked down but it's fine after the first wash... it's funny because people really, really like it when it's that slicked down. I don't get it. I feel like I have a weird head too


When I'm freshly relaxed, I tend to put my hair in a messy bun. I don't like that flat look either. My hair regains its volume around the 1-3 week post mark. I noticed that people that solely rely on salons to have their hair look good + don't really know how to care for their hair themselves, love the freshly relaxed look.


----------



## CodeRed (Apr 24, 2015)

Aireen said:


> When I'm freshly relaxed, I tend to put my hair in a messy bun. I don't like that flat look either. My hair regains its volume around the 1-3 week post mark. I noticed that people that solely rely on salons to have their hair look good + don't really know how to care for their hair themselves, love the freshly relaxed look.



1 - 3 weeks post is absolutely perfect. It's grown out a little bit and has a bit more "swing" to it but is still "fresh" looking


----------



## kupenda (Apr 27, 2015)

My straight hair is starting to annoy me again. My ends are tangling. I've oiled them but they tangle up the next day. I hope I don't need to cut more off. I just got rid of 3ish inches -__-


----------



## InBloom (Apr 27, 2015)

I wish that my mother took care of my hair when I was a child.

I wish I learned about proper hair care when I was a teenager.

I wish my hair was more dense (genetics).


----------



## CodeRed (Apr 27, 2015)

InBloom said:


> I wish I learned about proper hair care when I was a teenager.



I cosign. My mother taught me how to take care of my hair by showing me but the problem is that my hair changed a bit over time and it wasn't the same at 15/16 as it was at 10/11. Plus, since I got older, I was not walking around with the same styles so it was frustrating. She kept telling me "don't do [insert whatever I was doing] to your hair" but didn't tell me what to do instead. Now I'm teaching her how to do hers


----------



## InBloom (Apr 27, 2015)

@CodeRed 


Right!  My mom is resistant to learning better...she slaps on a wig and calls it done.


----------



## CodeRed (Apr 27, 2015)

InBloom said:


> @CodeRed
> 
> 
> Right!  My mom is resistant to learning better...she slaps on a wig and calls it done.



Oldschoolers are the hardest to get on board. They want to tell you that that's what they used to do in 1975 and it worked so it should work now.... Honestly, it didn't really work in 1975 but ya'll were all walking around with the same looking hair so that's what you were used to and thought it was working 

I will say, though, that the hot comb is still a good idea and afros are always welcome. I think I can leave everything else behind.


----------



## Aireen (Apr 27, 2015)

• I don't like deep conditioners as much as conditioners; they just don't perform the same on my hair at all. A lot of the time a deep conditioner will promise so much softness and moisture but my hair will be left feeling lackluster – the ones I'm referring to have that thick, masque texture that everyone but me seems to love.  Even my protein treatment is labelled as a conditioner but it has proteins, panthenol, and ceramide oils in the first 5 ingredients and I can FEEL that it's working in its own way.
• I rely heavily on rinse-out conditioners and – my newer love – serums.  I get softness, smoothness, and I'm able to lock in moisture easily. I also love sulfates and silicones to clean efficiently and protect my hair from heat.  

• I hate homemade hair treatments.  All of those avocado/egg/mayo/honey DIY treatments are a complete fail for me.  One of my setbacks was caused by an avocado hair mask so I will _never_ put any of those Youtube home remedies on my hair ever again. The most I can do is an at-home oil treatment, which is great, but it's messy and time-consuming so I usually don't bother.

• Usually I'm able to know that conditioner is good because my hair will droop a lot when the product is in and be hard to keep in a clip. 

• I use vitamins for both health and hair equally. My diet is very up and down so in case I don't get my nutrients, I can get them from supplements. Healthy inside = healthy outside. I frequently look at beauty supplement reviews so that it keeps me wanting to take my vitamins just from hearing about other people's benefits for their hair, skin, and nails.


----------



## CodeRed (Apr 27, 2015)

Aireen said:


> Healthy inside = healthy outside.



I totally agree 

Co-signing on the rinse out conditioners... Those have saved my hair so much... and the avocado egg treatment... pretty sure my sister wanted to murder me after I recommended it without trying it first. We both had crap stuck in our hair


----------



## CaramelPrincezz (Apr 28, 2015)

CaramelPrincezz said:


> Don't foresee natural any where in my future. I like wearing my hair down and I want it to be light and flowy. Natural doesn't give that to me. One bit of humidity and my hair reverts like crazy. Even stretching is out of the question anymore. I can hardly part my hair after 10-12 weeks.
> 
> 
> Whenever I wear my hair down, I always seem to have to bump my ends in the morning so I end up using heat daily
> ...



It's funny reading this from 2008, now that I've been transitioning and haven't had a relaxer since Feb 2014. Haha. Guess I learned how to manage my natural texture. I hardly ever wear my hair straight now. Trying to keep the heat off. Oh how things change with time.


----------



## BostonMaria (Apr 28, 2015)

BostonMaria said:


> I have a brand new bottle of Shescenti hair masque waiting for me in the bathroom. It took all my strength and will power not to wash my hair this morning. I can hear the bottle calling me from 16 miles away.. "Maria.. wash your herr... Mariahhhhh" (yes my bottle has a Southern accent in my dreams)



I must've been out of my damn mind 6 1/2 years ago LMAO


----------



## Honey Bee (Apr 28, 2015)

I grew up washing my hair (with shampoo) at least once or twice a week. I stopped that when I came to the board. When I started transitioning, I went back to m regular use of shampoo and my hair is thriving.


----------



## curlicarib (Apr 28, 2015)

I really, really love my hair. 


Really.


----------



## Goombay_Summer (Apr 28, 2015)

There are days that I still get frustrated with my hair and her diva like antics.


----------



## Honey Bee (Apr 28, 2015)

curlicarib said:


> I really, really love my hair.
> 
> 
> Really.


Me too! I didn't realize I'd love it so much! I feel bad cuz so many people seem to have trouble with their hair, but I loooove mine.


----------



## nothidden (Apr 28, 2015)

Aireen said:


> • I don't like deep conditioners as much as conditioners; they just don't perform the same on my hair at all. A lot of the time a deep conditioner will promise so much softness and moisture but my hair will be left feeling lackluster – the ones I'm referring to have that thick, masque texture that everyone but me seems to love.


You are not alone.  My hair doesn't feel the least bit conditioned after using DCs/masques.  I thought my expectations were too high, but my coworker said her hair definitely feels conditioned.


----------



## CodeRed (Apr 28, 2015)

Honey Bee said:


> Me too! I didn't realize I'd love it so much! I feel bad cuz so many people seem to have trouble with their hair, but I loooove mine.



I love my hair even when it gives me trouble because generally it's my fault it's giving me problems . I actually like that my hair isn't super thick and it does what I expect it to/want it to do. I have a really simple regimen that works for me and I thank God that I don't have to break the bank or spend a bunch of time for my hair to be healthy.


----------



## julzinha (Apr 28, 2015)

I am doing everything I can to make my hair super thick and dense. Taking supplements, using Njoy Oil, protective styling with no heat, coconut oil pre poos, eating very well and excercising. We will see in 6 months if all this works. So far I've been very consistent for the last 20 days. 

On a scale of 1 to 10, the highest my hair has been is a 7. I want a 10


----------



## ezina (Apr 28, 2015)

I totally destroyed a good part of my progress by using heat. I straightened my hair at a (Dominican) salon in September and December 2014. I didn't know it was a Dominican salon at first, but when I did, I still went back the second time and asked that they use less heat. That didn't happen. Instead, heat damage did. I'm very upset about this.


----------



## bklynbornNbred (Apr 28, 2015)

*confession*

A teeny tiny part of me is regretting the mini chop I did last week because the  on my shoulder is whispering go get a relaxer. I don't see how people have twist outs lasting 4/5 days. I don't have time or energy to keep redoing like this. I know I won't know what my hair will really do until I get rid of the rest of these permed ends but mine are not blending properly and even at *17 not* 18 mths I'm not about that short hair life anymore. I've done it plenty of times with variations of the Halle/Nia Long cut. I think I'm going to braid this up and keep it that way for a few more months of growth before I do something rash.

Besides ya'll low key have me turning into a product junkie.


----------



## Aireen (Apr 28, 2015)

CodeRed said:


> I totally agree
> 
> Co-signing on the rinse out conditioners... Those have saved my hair so much... and the avocado egg treatment... pretty sure my sister wanted to murder me after I recommended it without trying it first. We both had crap stuck in our hair



I love them too! The price is right also! $5 vs $20+ – expensive isn't always better.  I think I only like 4 masks and I know at least one is just as cheap as rinse out conditioners; the other 3 are generally considered cheap for masks.
Wow... how did you get the food out?! I had matting in my hair so bad that I had to do a decent cut.  NEVER AGAIN. I DO NOT GET THE HYPE. I rather use avocado oil than to EVER put a whole avocado in my hair again... it was a nightmare. 



nothidden said:


> You are not alone.  My hair doesn't feel the least bit conditioned after using DCs/masques.  I thought my expectations were too high, but my coworker said her hair definitely feels conditioned.



I'm glad I'm not the only one! I tried everything but I guess my hair just doesn't like them.  Even steaming doesn't help it much. I thought I was just using the wrong masks but I've tried a lot of products so I think it's my hair.


----------



## CodeRed (Apr 28, 2015)

Aireen said:


> Wow... how did you get the food out?! I had matting in my hair so bad that I had to do a decent cut.



I too thought I was going to have to cut it because it was matted. I shampooed... and shampooed... and shampooed... and then deep conditioned (put regular conditioner in and let it sit for a long time lol)... rinsed it out and did it again... and again... and again lol... By the time I was done it still wasn't all out but I could detangle my hair (I had more than normal shedding/possible breakage) and I blow-dried my hair with the comb attachment and some pieces of avocado fell out. I still had to pick a few out after all that. Crazy crazy crazy. I'm going to try avocado oil also and see how it does.

I think, for both me and my sister anyway, we didn't blend it enough. It was really chunky instead of looking smooth like a conditioner. I thought about doing it a few weeks ago but nah, I'll pass. I have enough low cost/decent priced products that I don't have to go through all that.


----------



## Aireen (Apr 28, 2015)

Honey Bee said:


> I grew up washing my hair (with shampoo) at least once or twice a week. I stopped that when I came to the board. When I started transitioning, I went back to m regular use of shampoo and my hair is thriving.


How often did you wash your hair when you came to the board? I'm guessing 1x/month? I think some people's hair needs that "constant" refresh of moisture so it'll be better for some to wash 1x-2x/week instead of further apart.


----------



## girlonfire (Apr 28, 2015)

I used to have really bad hair envy. I would look at youtube and celebrities and wish that my hair was like that (claire from my wife and kids hair). I wear wash and gos a lot now and in doing that I have really gotten to understand the way my curls curl and what they need to be the best they can be. And when they are the best they can be, I could not care less about what suzie mae or bonqueshia is doing. I admire what they have, but I'm in love with what I've got


----------



## Ogoma (Apr 28, 2015)

curlicarib said:


> I really, really love my hair.
> 
> 
> Really.





Honey Bee said:


> Me too! I didn't realize I'd love it so much! I feel bad cuz so many people seem to have trouble with their hair, but I loooove mine.



Have to cosign this. Even when I neglect my hair, it behaves. Went backpacking for 9 weeks, trying random conditioners; neglecting it for a few days when water was not an option; sleeping in buses, trains, tents, and on rough hostel sheets, and it just behaved. She is very kind to me and I love her for it. Plus she always looks fabulous.


----------



## Aireen (Apr 28, 2015)

CodeRed said:


> I too thought I was going to have to cut it because it was matted. I shampooed... and shampooed... and shampooed... and then deep conditioned (put regular conditioner in and let it sit for a long time lol)... rinsed it out and did it again... and again... and again lol... By the time I was done it still wasn't all out but I could detangle my hair (I had more than normal shedding/possible breakage) and I blow-dried my hair with the comb attachment and some pieces of avocado fell out. I still had to pick a few out after all that. Crazy crazy crazy. I'm going to try avocado oil also and see how it does.
> 
> I think, for both me and my sister anyway, we didn't blend it enough. It was really chunky instead of looking smooth like a conditioner. I thought about doing it a few weeks ago but nah, I'll pass. I have enough low cost/decent priced products that I don't have to go through all that.


Ugh, I tried everything and it only made a bit of a difference, I actually had to cut lol. I think I had to use half a bottle of Tresemme to get my hair to soften only a little. I could feel the roughness and it wasn't getting much better. I had a lot of breakage and had to cut out knots anyway so my hair was uneven and crazy; my stylist at the time evened my hair up, went from grazing WL to APL.  I made my avocado mask super smooth because I used a blender but it hardened on my hair and made it feel like hay.  At least it was easy to rinse out though. 

Don't do it. Do not mess with a good thing. I think that's what I'd recommend for anyone that wants long hair whether they've only now made the decision or they've been on a HHJ for a while, just stick to what works.  Avocado oil is nice though!  Very nourishing and penetrates the hair. I tend to use it on my skin because after like 2 days oils smell rancid on my hair.


----------



## InBloom (Apr 28, 2015)

Lmao @ bonqueshia @girlonfire


----------



## InBloom (Apr 28, 2015)

@Aireen 

Funny that I'm reading where you say that your hair does better with rinse-out conditioners vs "deep conditioners."  On this board, time and time again, it is said that nothing does as well as a deep conditioner that is designed as such.  I've also found that my hair behaves better with rinse outs.  And, you ain't lied when you point out the cost.  When I first joined the board, I about lost my mind and a grip of my money splurging on all of the expensive, high-end conditioners.  I got a hold of Aussie and stepped up to Humectress and have been more pleased with my results.


----------



## Aireen (Apr 28, 2015)

InBloom said:


> @Aireen
> 
> Funny that I'm reading where you say that your hair does better with rinse-out conditioners vs "deep conditioners."  On this board, time and time again, it is said that nothing does as well as a deep conditioner that is designed as such.  I've also found that my hair behaves better with rinse outs.  And, you ain't lied when you point out the cost.  When I first joined the board, I about lost my mind and a grip of my money splurging on all of the expensive, high-end conditioners.  I got a hold of Aussie and stepped up to Humectress and have been more pleased with my results.


Exactlyyyy!  I think it's good to try a couple masks and deep conditioners because you never know, you might find a gem. Like I said, I like 4 lol but overall, rinse-outs > deep conditioners. My hair is fine once I keep it simple and give it a shot of protein. I think the board has to focus on rules for the general population but imo, if they rules don't work for you, try something different and you may be pleasantly surprised. Also, never mind what people say because it's YOUR hair and YOU know it best.  Aussie is GREAT, sooo much slip, I just got sick of the smell.


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## ms.blue (Apr 29, 2015)

The only food grade items I use are oils and honey.  Yrs ago when I was learning about my natural hair, I decided to do a protein treatment using eggs and mayo.  That was the worse thing I ever done.  I had egg bits all through my hair plus my hair looked and felt horrible.  Plus I don't like to eat eggs and mayo so I should've taken that as a sign.


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## gemruby41 (Apr 29, 2015)

For those of you using rinse out conditioners, do you use heat with it or just use it in the shower?


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## CodeRed (Apr 29, 2015)

gemruby41 said:


> For those of you using rinse out conditioners, do you use heat with it or just use it in the shower?



I've used VO5 with heat because I added oil to it. Most of the time I'm just using them in the shower as a co-wash to either clean my hair or a post deep conditioner wash to get the extra oil out.


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## Honey Bee (Apr 29, 2015)

Aireen said:


> How often did you wash your hair when you came to the board? *I'm guessing 1x/month?* I think some people's hair needs that "constant" refresh of moisture so it'll be better for some to wash 1x-2x/week instead of further apart.


 I was a Wen girl at the time.



Ogoma said:


> Have to cosign this. Even when I neglect my hair, it behaves. Went backpacking for 9 weeks, trying random conditioners; neglecting it for a few days when water was not an option; sleeping in buses, trains, tents, and on rough hostel sheets, and it just behaved. She is very kind to me and I love her for it. Plus she always looks fabulous.


 Hey girl!


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## Honey Bee (Apr 29, 2015)

bklynbornNbred said:


> I think I'm going to braid this up and keep it that way for a few more months of growth before I do something rash.


Do that. I'll be two years post in July and my length is displeasing to me. So I wear updo's, crown braids, have fun hair candy. :shrug: Remember: *It's just a phase and it will be over soon. *And besides, it's spring, we should all be expecting a growth spurt.

Be strong!


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## Ogoma (Apr 29, 2015)

Honey Bee said:


> I was a Wen girl at the time.
> 
> 
> 
> Hey girl!



Hello!  still recovering from jet lag, but getting back to reading and trying to post more on here.


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## bklynbornNbred (Apr 30, 2015)

@Honey Bee Thank you for talking me off the ledge.

The crazy thing is I was fussing over the way my twist out looked, went to run some errands and got a bunch of unsolicited compliments. I think once I get my new regime down I'll be ok.  I'm not a product junkie and messing around with different brands trying to get it right is bugging me. I'm still gonna pick up some hair to wash so I can braid it up but the relaxer devil is off my shoulder.

*17* months (75 weeks) and still counting!


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## NappyNelle (Apr 30, 2015)

I used a tweezer to pluck out the most conspicuous greys near my part and I feel a lot better. LOL


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## mschristine (May 1, 2015)

I'm up at 1 AM deep conditioning my hair just because I'm bored...no other reason at all


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## all_1_length (May 1, 2015)

I'm going back to sulfate shampoo and it feels so good.


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## ag00 (May 4, 2015)

I purposely subscribe to chocolate-skinned gurus (even if they don't have my hair texture) because I love seeing people my color doing their thing.


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## Cattypus1 (May 4, 2015)

girlonfire said:


> I used to have really bad hair envy. I would look at youtube and celebrities and wish that my hair was like that (claire from my wife and kids hair). I wear wash and gos a lot now and in doing that I have really gotten to understand the way my curls curl and what they need to be the best they can be. And when they are the best they can be, I could not care less about what suzie mae or bonqueshia is doing. I admire what they have, but I'm in love with what I've got


Bonqueshia...No, no, no!


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## Lilmama1011 (May 5, 2015)

I love wearing my hair out.  I wish I wasn't such a huge trimmer in high school and I would have been at waist length


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## CluelessJL (May 6, 2015)

I just realised that I mixed 12 different things together to make last week's DC (including conditioners, oils, EOs etc.) and I'm prepared to admit that I have a problem...


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## LeftRightRepeat (May 6, 2015)

I need to hang out more in the hair section. My hairdresser bill is too high but my roller sets make me look like I am tell axed when I am.really 2 weeks post relaxer.


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## HopefulOne (May 6, 2015)

abordeaux said:


> What are your deepest, darkest secrets about your hair, haircare, or beauty that you've never shared before?
> 
> Here's mine:
> 
> ...




I feel the same way and so guilty about it.  My hair is zero trouble and I feel bad when I read about the struggles that other naturals have.  If I had to go through what they do, I would be relaxed.


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## Blessed&higlyflavoured (May 7, 2015)

I'm a perfectionist (not a very thorough one but a perfectionist none the less). I hate the fact that when I do everything right with my hair and have 50-11 steps in my hair regimen and the purest of pure oils my hair literally falls out of my scalp. But if I slap some curl activator on twist it up for a month and forget about it it thrives. Its like I dont just want my hair to grow, I want to be able to control how, when and in what manner it grows. Gotta just leave it with Jesus and focus my energy somewhere else or this hair thing will go from something I'm interested in to an unhealthy obsession. 


Just realised I can apply the same thing to my BF, career, diet.


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## naija24 (May 7, 2015)

I sometimes sense there is a stigma associated with naturals who straighten 100% of the time vs rocking their natural curls. Does anyone else sense this or am I crazy?


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## ms.blue (May 7, 2015)

naija24 said:


> I sometimes sense there is a stigma associated with naturals who straighten 100% of the time vs rocking their natural curls. Does anyone else sense this or am I crazy?



Definitely not crazy.  I have noticed that as well especially in a few natural hair groups on FB.  Hair is all about being versatility and individuality.  It seems that when naturals who decide to straighten, a few will come up and say that that the person doesn't like their natural hair...it ain't that serious.  There is always some sort of divide in the natural hair community that will prevent us coming together as a whole.


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## Bette Davis Eyes (May 7, 2015)

I'm thinking of a smoothing treatment to get my curls not to tangle so much. Curl definition is not all its cracked up to be.  Only reason I wear a washngo is so I dont have to  detangle my hair. Its stressful at times. 

If I was OCD,  Id cut every snag I see and really be stuck at this length.  It's ok, Im getting a crochet next week because I was SO close to cutting my hair the other day.

My  almost fiance was staring at me with the meanest side eye -_-


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## BostonMaria (May 7, 2015)

oooh my hair feels so gross today. I got alot of nerve wearing it down.
Its going to be in a wash 'n go tomorrow.

I feel like I need a new conditoner that won't break the bank and smells really good. Any recommendations?  Hopefully somebody will read this LOL


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## BostonMaria (May 7, 2015)

ms.blue said:


> Definitely not crazy.  I have noticed that as well especially in a few natural hair groups on FB.  Hair is all about being versatility and individuality.  It seems that when naturals who decide to straighten, a few will come up and say that that the person doesn't like their natural hair...it ain't that serious.  There is always some sort of divide in the natural hair community that will prevent us coming together as a whole.



In real life I don't notice this, but on Facebook yes.  This forum is probably the only place where I'd post pictures of my straightened natural hair without worrying about what others will say.  I'm at the point now that I really don't care about other people's opinions.  Its not that serious to me either.  If I wear my hair hair curly or straight it just depends on my mood that day.  I noticed that the people that are really militant about stuff like this end up going back to relaxers anyway. We need versatility.


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## ItsMeLilLucky (May 7, 2015)

I got sick of my natural hair, texlaxed it, got sick of that because the stylist destroyed my curl pattern when she straightened it, now I'm going to install Bradelocs. I have no idea what to do with my hair if I don't like it.


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## mschristine (May 18, 2015)

I love the way my hair looks when it's soaked in conditioner. My hair is very texlaxed and I'm fine with that but I'm not even remotely thinking about going natural...


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## bklynbornNbred (May 18, 2015)

bklynbornNbred said:


> @Honey Bee Thank you for talking me off the ledge.
> 
> The crazy thing is I was fussing over the way my twist out looked, went to run some errands and got a bunch of unsolicited compliments. I think once I get my new regime down I'll be ok.  I'm not a product junkie and messing around with different brands trying to get it right is bugging me. I'm still gonna pick up some hair to wash so I can braid it up but the relaxer devil is off my shoulder.
> 
> *17* months (75 weeks) and still counting!



So what had happened was....

I made it to 77 weeks 2 days. My two textures were not playing well at all and when I was debating not to do my hair cause it didn't smell that bad I threw in conditioner to pre poo. The curls started talking to me and I impulsively cut. 

Shorter than I wanted but I'll survive. All the tangles disappeared. My relaxed ends were causing all sorts of issues. Maybe now I'll see some growth. 

Now my confession. When I was on the relaxed and long term stretching side I used to silently judge product junkies. 

I have now become what I used to look down on.  I realized I was starting to pile up products as my natural hair became majority but my ends were still not cooperating. This is one of the reasons the  on my shoulder got those scissors in my hand. But now that I'm natural I have to physically avoid the beauty supply store, Duane Reade and Target. I bought more these last few days than I have for years. Had to hang my head when I bought a dupe of something I already had by mistake.

 My name is bklynbornNbred and I'm starting to have a priblem.

In any case I apologize to those I judged.


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## niknakmac (May 19, 2015)

I just got these seneglese twists May 2.  I paid a grip.  Why do I want to take them out already.  I'm going to try to keep them in for a month.


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## julzinha (May 19, 2015)

I just really want my hair to be a 10 one day and hopefully in a year. I'm talking about waist length with super full edges and hair density for days.


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## missyrayne19 (Jun 7, 2015)

I didn't heat style my hair for 3 weeks and have been either air-drying straight or doing braid outs. I know better but I was feeling really hair lazy and just did NOT want to take the time to do my usual roller sets.

Welp....

I'm paying for it now. I finally sat down and did a thorough wash day and the tangles and knots in my NG were a _mess_!! I was so upset with myself. Because I freaking know better! My hair LOVES heat, does better with heat, and throws an absolute hissy fit if I deprive her from heat for too long. Heatless styles may be easier and healthier (for the most part) but my hair just does not like them for very long. And on top of that, I was looking at my ends and I've experienced some breakage where I'm gonna need a half inch cut or so. I was planning on doing this anyway but there's just something about being forced to cut your hair due to damage as opposed to choosing to do so because you want to. 

It took me about 2 hours to detangle my whole head. Today's wash day was a good wake up call. No more heatless styles. Back to my dryer I must go!


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## Leo24Rule (Jun 7, 2015)

I'm really obsessed with hair.

All my life I've had long thick hair (MBL), but when I started to do my own hair once I started community college - throughout my undergrad years I really abused my hair by using the hot comb daily to applying loads of olive oil on my hair and then flat ironing it because I loved the straight sleek look  These _baaaad_ techniques made my hair break off to SL and become thin   So now I'm trying to get my hair back to thick hair. *I WANT THICK HAIR SO BAD!* My hair stretched is now HL, but on the thin side yet kinda thickening up.

When trying to grow out my hair I used protective styles including phony ponies, wigs, and made pony tail out of braid hair. Now that my hair has grown I no longer want to wear full wigs because the combs or friction of the wig has pulled out hair in the hairline and caused a little bald spot (has grown in).
Although, I still wear half-wigs when I go out. I'd rather not spend anymore money on extensions and instead wear my hair out, but I must admit my mother (her hair is a very thin BSL) is always encouraging me to buy more wigs or to wear the half-wigs for volume. I've told her she's making me feel insecure as if my hair isn't beautiful or enough by constantly telling me those things.
I have hair that is beautiful and long...I just want to be free!


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## nothidden (Jun 8, 2015)

Aireen said:


> I'm glad I'm not the only one! I tried everything but I guess my hair just doesn't like them.  Even steaming doesn't help it much. I thought I was just using the wrong masks but I've tried a lot of products so I think it's my hair.


Because it is so expensive, I gave DevaCurl's HeavenInHair another shot this weekend.  Sunday I worked in a good amount of it and sat under the steamer (on low) for more than half an hour and can see and feel a difference (more defined fractals).  Now it is the only DC I plan to buy/use.


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## mschristine (Jun 8, 2015)

My hair was so thirsty today! It soaked up my protein treatment and moisturizing conditioner quickly..I need to give it more love


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## snookes (Dec 28, 2015)

KEWLKAT103 said:


> *-It really bothers me to walk in a room full of AA women and be the only one wearing my own hair on my head.*
> 
> *-When someone on here complains that people think all AA women with long hair is fake, I understand why.*


Ditto


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## julzinha (Dec 29, 2015)

I feel like I'm obsessed with my hair journey because it represents the an unattained goal of mine. I've been able to reach so many goals from academic to fitness to skin care, yet my hair has always been a challenge. And although my longest layer is BSB, the type A in me is not happy until I hit my goal length and thickness.


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