# Why Young Christians Aren't Waiting Anymore



## Iwanthealthyhair67 (Oct 17, 2011)

*Why young Christians aren't waiting anymore*

By *John Blake*, CNN
*(CNN) –*True love doesn’t wait after all.
That’s the implication in the upcoming October issue of an evangelical magazine that claims that young, unmarriedChristians are having premarital sex almost as much as their non-Christian peers.
The *article* in Relevant magazine, entitled “(Almost) Everyone’s Doing It,” cited several studies examining the sexual activity of single Christians. One of the biggest surprises was a December 2009 study, conducted by the* National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy, *which included information on sexual activity.
While the *study’s *primary report did not explore religion, some additional analysis focusing on sexual activity and religious identification yielded this result: 80 percent of unmarried evangelical young adults (18 to 29*) *said that they have had sex - slightly less than 88 percent of unmarried adults*, *according to the teen pregnancy prevention organization.
The article highlights what challenges abstinence movements face. Movements such as “True Love Waits,” encourage teens to wear purity rings, sign virginity pledges and pledge chastity during public ceremonies.
Yet many of these Christian youths eventually abandon their purity pledges, Relevant’s Tyler Charles concludes in the article. Tyler talked to people like “Maria,” an evangelical woman who said she wanted to wait until marriage to have sex.
But she said she started having sex with her college boyfriend when she turned 20 because nearly everyone, even most of her Christian friends, were having sex.

Maria:
It seemed everyone in my life, older and younger, had “done it.” In fact, I waited longer than most people I knew and longer than both of my sisters, even though we were all Christians and came from a good home.​Relevant theorizes about why it’s so hard for so many young Christians to wait, including the saturation of sex in popular culture, the prevalence of pornography and a popular “do what feels good philosophy.”
Yet the article also asks a question that rarely comes up in discussions about abstinence movement. Relevant notes that in biblical times, people married earlier. The average age for marriage has been increasing in the U.S for the last 40 years.
Today, it’s not unusual to meet a Christian who is single at 30 - or 40 or 50, for that matter. So what do you tell them? Keep waiting?
Scot McKnight, author of “The Jesus Creed,” and "One.Faith: Jesus Calls, We Follow," acknowledges that young, single Christians face temptations that their counterparts in the biblical age didn’t face.
He tells Relevant:
Sociologically speaking, the one big difference – and it’s monstrous – between the biblical teaching and our culture is the arranged marriages of very young people. If you get married when you’re 13, you don’t have 15 years of temptation.​So what should a Christian parent or youth pastor do? How do they convince more young Christians to wait until marriage, or should they stop even trying?




*John Blake* - CNN Writer


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## Shimmie (Oct 17, 2011)

I'll be back....


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## Poohbear (Oct 17, 2011)

Iwanthealthyhair67 said:


> So what should a Christian parent or youth pastor do? How do they convince more young Christians to wait until marriage, or should they stop even trying?


They need to stop teaching that it's "okay" to sin as long as you believe in Jesus, and that Jesus will forgive you over and over and over again.


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## Guitarhero (Oct 17, 2011)

Good post.  It's wrong, no matter how they try and justify it.  What do we do in our Church/family?  Teach our catechism.  It's mortal sin and removes the saving grace until it's restored via confession.  You cannot even get married (have to receive eucharist) if in a state of mortal sin...and if you lie, you further complicate things for your soul. I'm talking about the 6 months or so of prep/counsel with the priest.  Well, this is what we do and then we talk about the possible complications in health, etc.   But the first is the moral base.


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## Shimmie (Oct 17, 2011)

> So what should a Christian parent or youth pastor do? How do they convince more young Christians to wait until marriage, or should they stop even trying?



Are 'they' kidding????   Please tell me this question is a joke.    

Sit them down and remind them of the consequences of sin?   What makes them think this is okay?   Do they even realize that God 'sees' them, IN ACTION.  

Do they even care that God sees them?

What is their recourse, Heaven or hell?  

Have they lost their mind?  

Have they forsaken the God who loves them?  

As them what if they had their last breath instead of a climax?  If so, where would they go?  I'm being real here. 

What are 'they' even in need of having to have a conversartion regarding the consequences of sexual sin?  

*And yes*, I'm ticked off.   Are they kidding me?  

They KNOW BETTER !   

*THEY KNOW BETTER!   *


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## LucieLoo12 (Oct 17, 2011)

People dont teach on Hell no more. They dont teach that God destroyed Sodom and Ghomorra (25,000 people in one day) (sp) for the sin of fornication. They teach love, love, love, love.. This generation has no fear of God, nor any reverence. The bible says to fear the Lord is to depart from inquity.No one is departing because there is NO fear of God..


And another thing,what is CNN basing thier Chrisitanity on? What makes them to be called a Christian? Did CNN just ask them "Are u Christian?, and they said "Yes we are", and they did this article on them? So now it looks like "Christians" are just having sex all over the place and we dont even know if they really are Chrisitans 

Christian means to be Christ like--so are they?????


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## aribell (Oct 17, 2011)

Religious affiliation doesn't necessarily mean anything. But even for the genuinely born again, I think a lot of this is the church's fault for trying to embrace worldly values when it comes to putting off marriage but then expect young people to not succumb to the temptation it creates. Particularly given the fact that young adults are thrown together for unlimited amounts of time on college campuses...it's not even like those more old fashioned gender boundaries are respected anymore. So it's just a perfect storm of temptation.

Yes, every single person needs to be abstinent, period. However, we have made things much more challenging than they need to be. Paul gave his advice that it's better to marry than to burn for exactly this reason. Christian parents and pastors should put more energy into helping prepare their young adults to marry young when it makes biological (and biblical) sense instead of being like the world and telling them to pursue extra degrees first, "live your life," etc.

ETA: Also, having had sex is not the same thing as regularly having sex. I'd like to see more of a breakdown of current activity rather than simply past experience.

Aaaannnd, I think the example of marrying in the bible at 13 is extreme. There's so much room for the church to embrace a culture where people are marrying closer to 20 than to 30 and that would probably help a lot. If young Christians aren't ready for marriage at 20, the question should be why not and what parents and the church should be doing to make them more mature.


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## nathansgirl1908 (Oct 17, 2011)

I honestly don't even know how they can go about making the necessary changes.  I think back over my life and it was really my own focus on what God wanted that made me decide to wait.  I wasn't one to cave into peer pressure or believe that because many people engaged in something that it was right.  But I see now that kids these days are weak.  It takes more than just saying that the Word speaks on this and that God is not pleased.  When people are young, they don't think about long term consequences such as hell.  I liken it to how many people don't start saving for retirement early on in their careers.  It's because the end result doesn't seem real to them.  

Poohbear, I agree to a certain extent.  We've talked about this before.  We're NOT supposed to keep doing the same thing over and over without true remorse and expecting forgiveness.  That's not true repenting.  But I don't even know if that's truly the issue here.  

Bottom line I think they believe that because sooo many people do it, that all of these people couldn't possibly be hell bound, and so they figure that maybe it's not such a sin in the first place.


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## Shimmie (Oct 17, 2011)

Alicialynn86 said:


> People dont teach on Hell no more. They dont teach that God destroyed Sodom and Ghomorra (25,000 people in one day) (sp) for the sin of fornication. They teach love, love, love, love.. This generation has no fear of God, nor any reverence. The bible says to fear the Lord is to depart from inquity.No one is departing because there is NO fear of God..
> 
> 
> And another thing,what is CNN basing thier Chrisitanity on? What makes them to be called a Christian? *Did CNN just ask them "Are u Christian?, and they said "Yes we are", and they did this article on them? So now it looks like "Christians" are just having sex all over the place and we dont even know if they really are Chrisitans
> ...



Alicialynn86

Thank you so much for pointing this out.   It makes so much sense.   There are many who say that they 'are' Christian and yet have absolutely no concept of the true meaning of Christianity.   

There are 'True Believers', Non-Believers and 'MAKE Believers'.   

If one truly has Jesus Christ in their heart, the conviction of the Holy Spirit truly has reign over Christians when they sin.  I am absolutely miserable when I do something wrong.   The Holy Spirit becomes grieved and I can feel it so strong in my heart.   That alone moves one into repentence.    And this is not an opinion.


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## Shimmie (Oct 17, 2011)

There was a thread posted in here about 2 years ago.  One of our members from the Off Topic forum, created a thread, asking about Christians who have sex outside of marriage.   She was basically asking how many Christians were in this 'practice'.  

She said that she asked because in the other forums, there were many women who professed to be Christians yet they were _'boasting' _of their sex lives.  

I took it as an 'afront' to Christianity, a life that I stand steadfast upon.   

Hence this article, I see as another afront.  

I thank God for the statement made in Alicialynn86's post.   Are they really Christians?

The devil has his counterfeits.   Do you hear me?  They are strategically placed to mislead and misguide and misinform onlookers about the true heart of Christians.


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## Shimmie (Oct 17, 2011)

nathansgirl1908 said:


> I honestly don't even know how they can go about making the necessary changes.  I think back over my life and it was really my own focus on what God wanted that made me decide to wait.  I wasn't one to cave into peer pressure or believe that because many people engaged in something that it was right.  But I see now that kids these days are weak.  It takes more than just saying that the Word speaks on this and that God is not pleased.
> 
> When people are young, they don't think about long term consequences such as hell.  I liken it to how many people don't start saving for retirement early on in their careers.  It's because the end result doesn't seem real to them.
> 
> ...



This is another very good point.    And it shows that they _don't_ have the heart of Jesus Christ.   They're playing games with sin and are no different than the world.    

It reminds me of the days of Noah before the flood.   People saw so and so sin and hell didn't open up for them, so it became a chain reaction of sinners who refused to have an ear for God's voice; which resulted in the flood.  

The 'retirement' analogy was excellent for comparison.


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## Guitarhero (Oct 17, 2011)

All people need to do is learn how to examine themselves and their actions against the 10 commandments.  We all fail, but get back up.  We have the grace.  You do x, you need y for z.  Shrugs.


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## LucieLoo12 (Oct 17, 2011)

Thats why I believe the Media is biased in alot of ways. Why when they interview a African American, it has to be the one who doesnt speak correct grammar, rollers in their hair, houserobe on?(no offense, just example ) Its like they pick the worst and stereotype everyone off that one or few people.

Why when  they are doing news interviews on foodstamp or welfare issues, its always a black person they interview? When statistics shows it more whites on it than us? 

Same as this Christian article, they went and got these
 "Church-ians" (people that just go to church with no real commitment to God) and base the whole Chrisitian group on it.They do this stuff on purpose (and im not trying to sound like some Conspiracy Therory dectective either ) . Do they ever do news article on someone living sold out for God? ummm, i havent seen any..But they quick to show Eddie Bishop Long CONTINOUSLY with his sex scandal. What this does is it  makes that person who wants to live a godly life, feel like its impossible to do it, because all this garbage going around.




Shimmie said:


> There was a thread posted in here about 2 years ago. One of our members from the Off Topic forum, created a thread, asking about Christians who have sex outside of marriage. She was basically asking how many Christians were in this 'practice'.
> 
> She said that she asked because in the other forums, there were many women who professed to be Christians yet they were _'boasting' _of their sex lives.
> 
> ...


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## PinkPebbles (Oct 17, 2011)

Shimmie said:


> @Alicialynn86
> 
> Thank you so much for pointing this out. It makes so much sense. *There are many who say that they 'are' Christian and yet have absolutely no concept of the true meaning of Christianity. *
> 
> ...


 
I agree with most of the things that have been shared in this thread.

On the other hand, I don’t think we should leave those in darkness who have backslidden and say they never loved God.  This is where the saints supposed to step in and speak the truth in love and perhaps get to the root cause of the issue. 

Peter denied Christ three times; a disciple of Jesus who walked with the Lord and witnessed signs and wonders. Peter even walked on water….. Yet, God forgave Peter and did not leave him out from the house of faith.

Our fall may not be fornication but it could be or have been something else; and God showed mercy. I wouldn’t be so quick to say we never loved God and was a fake believer.


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## LucieLoo12 (Oct 17, 2011)

We wasnt speaking on EVERY person that has backslidden or caught in the act of fornication.We know this was something that David in the bible did and we know that he repented of it and God forgave him.  We dont have a clue who this article was done. We are just making a GENERAL statement and point of view of the article

*"But she said she started having sex with her college boyfriend when she turned 20 because nearly everyone, even most of her Christian friends, were having sex."*-------this doesnt sound like a struggle, but a way of life.

Diclaimer: This is only my opinion 




PinkPebbles said:


> I agree with most of the things that have been shared in this thread.
> 
> On the other hand, I don’t think we should leave those in darkness who have backslidden and say they never loved God. This is where the saints supposed to step in and speak the truth in love and perhaps get to the root cause of the issue.
> 
> ...


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## PinkPebbles (Oct 17, 2011)

Alicialynn86 said:


> We wasnt speaking on EVERY person that has backslidden or caught in the act of fornication.We know this was something that David in the bible did and we know that he repented of it and God forgave him. We dont have a clue who this article was done. We are just making a GENERAL statement and point of view of the article
> 
> *"But she said she started having sex with her college boyfriend when she turned 20 because nearly everyone, even most of her Christian friends, were having sex."*-------this doesnt sound like a struggle, but a way of life.
> 
> Diclaimer: This is only my opinion


 
My comment wasn't just in reference to the article...I was speaking in general about those who have backslidden...sin is sin.


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## JayAnn0513 (Oct 17, 2011)

We can go back to getting married younger :- ( It's no coincidence that you are more likely to be a virgin in you marry earlier. 


Sent from my iPhone using LHCF


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## LucieLoo12 (Oct 17, 2011)

Agree. Sin is sin



PinkPebbles said:


> My comment wasn't just in reference to the article...I was speaking in general about those who have backslidden...sin is sin.


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## LoveisYou (Oct 17, 2011)

Thanks so much for this thread!


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## Shimmie (Oct 17, 2011)

PinkPebbles said:


> I agree with most of the things that have been shared in this thread.
> 
> On the other hand, I don’t think we should leave those in darkness who have backslidden and say they never loved God.
> 
> ...



PinkPebbles... none of this is personal towards you.   I need to make this crystal clear.   I'm very serious about this issue and it is imperative that I make it clear that my comments are not about you nor anyone else in this thread.   I am addressing the issue, the subject matter ONLY.  

@the bolded in your post:   THIS is the huge part of the problem... right here:

Allowing folks to be 'babied' in their sin.    Don't dare correct the sin with the firm Word of God.   Just pat em' on the back 'straight to hell.'

The root cause is the Flesh and rebellion and just plain foolishness.  

There are INDEED some situations which MERIT tender loving care when one is in sin; but it doesn't apply to all of them.   This article is just plain mess going on and there are no excuses... IF they be Christian. 

There comes a point when an epidemic has to have strong measures of elimination.     It has to be wiped out before it destroys everything else around it.   A little leaven levens the whole lump.  From the looks of this article, this is indeed an epidemic and it's spilled over into the Church far enough.   It's time to put a stop to it.    This is one of the reasons why homosexuality is running rampant, too many supporters are loving them _steadfast_ in this sin.  And now this mess has spilled over into the Churches.     

If this article is truly about Christians, then the point I'm making is self evident.   No one is setting things straight with a firm hand.     God, Himself becomes weary with the explosion of sin, hence Noah and the Ark, the earthquake which swallowed the Children of Israel due they rebellion, Sodom and Gomorrah.... this earth as we live in it now, is reacting to the weight of sin [earthquakes, hurricanes, tsunamis, oil spills, the economy and more and all of which has been prophesied by God's Word].  Just how far is it supposed to go?  

Love PLUS a firm hand of God's Word is what's needed; for God chastises those whom He loves.     

Being passive about it, isn't the answer.    For why is it only getting worse?    Either they are saved or they are not.   Live the life.    Stop making excuses about others who have fallen.    Of course we all know that King David fell, however there was a lesson to be learned from his experience.   Don't do what David did.  

This may not be what folks want to hear, however it's not going to change the truth of the matter.   God is not playing games.    He is not.   So stop playing games with God.   He is not a toy; he is not the latest iphone, ipad, or play station.   HE's GOD and He changes not.    

This not a message of doom and gloom.   It's a warning.  Stop playing Games with God.    There's a conversation where a member became upset because it was mentioned by another member that California had an unusual weather disaster impending.    The poster asked why does it have to be the US?  Meaning that the US has been unjustly targeted.      Obviously there was fear behind the poster's question.   Fear of the sin they were in.    

The earth is reacting to sin; it cannot bear the weight of it.  The heavier the sin, the weaker the earth's surface becomes to support it.  

This article... if it be true of Christians, they need to be compelled to get it right.  Jesus said "Compell them... sinners to repent of their sins.  Repent means to turn away from, not say 'I'm sorry and then do it again.  

It's way too late if allowed to seal their fate.    Compell them to repent.


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## PinkPebbles (Oct 17, 2011)

Shimmie said:


> @PinkPebbles... none of this is personal towards you. I need to make this crystal clear. I'm very serious about this issue and it is imperative that I make it clear that my comments are not about you nor anyone else in this thread. I am addressing the issue, the subject matter ONLY.
> 
> @the bolded in your post: THIS is the huge part of the problem... right here:
> 
> ...


 
You missed my point. My comment wasn't in total reference to this article. I'm not justifying sin or being passive about it. And I certainly do not play games with God. 

You made a statement about backslidden believers and I commented on it. Of course we are to speak the truth and expose sin for what it is. However, we are to disciple the backslidders rather than condemning them to hell. We should be focused on telling them to get out of sin and the consequences for not; instead of saying you are a fake believer and never loved God.


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## PinkPebbles (Oct 17, 2011)

And while we are on the topic of sins, let us EXPOSE IT ALL so everyone can be delivered up in this camp.

SINS that are overlooked in the Body of Chirst.

PRIDE
SELF-RIGHTEOUSNESS
ARROGANCE
GOSSIP
EVIL THINKING
IDOLATRY
SELF-SEEKING
FALSE PROPHETS
ENVY
JEALOUSY
BACK-BITING
STRIFE
UNFORGIVENESS
STUBBORN
DISOBEDIENCE
INSTIGATORS
GREED
RUDENESS
CONDESCENDING


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## Shimmie (Oct 17, 2011)

Alicialynn86 said:


> Thats why I believe the Media is biased in alot of ways. Why when they interview a African American, it has to be the one who doesnt speak correct grammar, rollers in their hair, houserobe on?(no offense, just example ) Its like they pick the worst and stereotype everyone off that one or few people.
> 
> Why when  they are doing news interviews on foodstamp or welfare issues, its always a black person they interview? When statistics shows it more whites on it than us?
> 
> ...



Alicialynn86

Your entire post is so ON POINT!   Thank you again and again.


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## Shimmie (Oct 17, 2011)

PinkPebbles said:


> You missed my point. My comment wasn't in total reference to this article. I'm not justifying sin or being passive about it. And I certainly do not play games with God.
> 
> You made a statement about backslidden believers and I commented on it. Of course we are to speak the truth and expose sin for what it is. However, we are to disciple the backslidders rather than condemning them to hell. We should be focused on telling them to get out of sin and the consequences for not; instead of saying you are a fake believer and never loved God.



You saw what you wanted to see in my post.    

I didn't condemn anyone to hell.  Neither did I say you were passive.   Nor did I say you were playing games with God.   I made it clear in my post that none of what I said was personally directed towards you.


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## Shimmie (Oct 17, 2011)

PinkPebbles said:


> And while we are on the topic of sins, let us EXPOSE IT ALL so everyone can be delivered up in this camp.
> 
> SINS that are overlooked in the Body of Chirst.
> 
> ...



PinkPebbles... including yourself?   Right?   

It's obvious that you are venting.     

You wrote this post out of anger.   The same way I wrote my posts about this thread's topic and the issue behind.

There's an ought in your heart.   Oh yes, it's definitely there.     Whatever you don't like about what I said, have said in past posts/threads, let it go.   

Let it go.  

You need to let it go.


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## Jynlnd13 (Oct 18, 2011)

.................................


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## PinkPebbles (Oct 18, 2011)

Shimmie said:


> PinkPebbles... including yourself? Right?
> 
> It's obvious that you are venting.
> 
> ...


 
Shimmie
 Let me tell you what you need to let go...

You are so quick to preach to someone and rebuke them, but the minute someone expose your dirty drawers you can't handle it. For once in your life swallow your pride, your self rigtheous attitude, and humble yourself under the mighty hand of God. Allow God to hold a mirror up to your heart because my dear, it is deceitful. 

I never professed that I'm perfect. I put that list up there so we can all be delivered.

So if the shoe fits wear it, and be delivered.

Jeremiah 17:9-10
The heart is deceitful above all things. And desperately wicked; Who can know it? I, the Lord search the heart, I test the mind.


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## Laela (Oct 18, 2011)

Aw, man...that was a great testimony and I applaud you for sharing this. You never know who is reading that will be encouraged by your testimony today... it is very relevant to this discussion...

@ the bolded  

God bless~




Jynlnd13 said:


> I haven't read the whole article or all of the replies to this thread. I will have to eta later on. I just wanted to say that I am 20 years old and I'm still a virgin. Has it been difficult? Yes, especially since I had unbalanced hormones and had to go  on birth control. I thought because I wasn't having sex, I was ok to do other "things" to help control my urges. I have been battling this addiction/ problem for years until recently when I believe God slapped me up side the head..I believe that this sin, was /is the portal of my cancer. Especially due to its location and everything. Sorry for going a bit OT. I'll write more later, but *I defiantly think this is a real issue that needs more attention, and stop being stupid and encouraging "boys to be boys",etc.*


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## Iwanthealthyhair67 (Oct 18, 2011)

Jynlnd13

we've allowed the world to 'teach' us for two long...we have the power to put this body under subjection that includes those raging hormones...


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## LucieLoo12 (Oct 18, 2011)

Amen!! To the testimony! See people need to hear our struggles , but also how we came out of them and how we dont have to be Chrisitans struggling and barely hanging on, but we can be overcomers through Christ because He said we are more than conquerors....!!!!


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## Shimmie (Oct 18, 2011)

PinkPebbles said:


> Shimmie
> Let me tell you what you need to let go...
> 
> You are so quick to preach to someone and rebuke them, but the minute someone expose your dirty drawers you can't handle it. For once in your life swallow your pride, your self rigtheous attitude, and humble yourself under the mighty hand of God. Allow God to hold a mirror up to your heart because my dear, it is deceitful.
> ...



Thank you, PinkPebbles.  You've confirmed what I sensed was going on here.


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## PinkPebbles (Oct 18, 2011)

Shimmie said:


> Thank you, @PinkPebbles. You've confirmed what I sensed was going on here.


 
Likewise.....


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## Shimmie (Oct 18, 2011)

Jynlnd13 said:


> I haven't read the whole article or all of the replies to this thread. I will have to eta later on. I just wanted to say that I am 20 years old and I'm still a virgin. Has it been difficult? Yes, especially since I had unbalanced hormones and had to go  on birth control.
> 
> I thought because I wasn't having sex, I was ok to do other "things" to help control my urges. I have been battling this addiction/ problem for years until recently when I believe God slapped me up side the head..I believe that this sin, was /is the portal of my cancer. Especially due to its location and everything. Sorry for going a bit OT. I'll write more later, but I defiantly think this is a real issue that needs more attention, and stop being stupid and encouraging "boys to be boys",etc.



Jynlnd13 ...

Still and always... I'm praying for your healing.  

You're a baby, so young to have this going on in your body.   Yet you bear it, choosing to honour God and choosing to love Him.   

When I look at the world and see how it carries on with it's craziness, and then see a young child of God, who's heart is set to please Him, and who is under such an attack, only a miracle can be in store; only a miracle.

With all of my heart, I believe you are healed, completely.   A testimony unto God.  This is not a sickness unto death (John 11:4), but a testimony of one who has given her heart where many doubted.    

Healed you are, in Jesus' Name.   Amen.


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## MissNina (Oct 18, 2011)

I Really, REALLY have something to say, but im on the fence on whether i should say it or not. . .but i just feel like there isnt another viewpoint being addressed here.

I may BBL.


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## Shimmie (Oct 18, 2011)

Alicialynn86 said:


> Amen!! To the testimony! See people need to hear our struggles , but also how we came out of them and how we dont have to be Chrisitans struggling and barely hanging on, but we can be overcomers through Christ because He said we are more than conquerors....!!!!



Often, some may feel that their 'struggles' may not help another, yet they do help others... '_Often'_.  And for this I praise God each day, helping others, mostly to and for those whose testimonies have helped me.


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## aribell (Oct 18, 2011)

PinkPebbles said:


> And while we are on the topic of sins, let us EXPOSE IT ALL so everyone can be delivered up in this camp.
> 
> SINS that are overlooked in the Body of Chirst.
> 
> ...



This list is a part of the reason I posted about marrying earlier.  I think the church can be too quick to be satisfied with washing the outside of the cup while leaving the interior to rot.  I'm reminded of that ridiculous thread on "soaking" where these Mormon kids decided it wasn't really sex so long as no one moved...   Or the fact that so many consider oral sex okay because "technically" they haven't had sex  (which apparently is a concept much more prevalent in the post-Clinton generation).  Then there's the issue of pornography and how one minister said that when he speaks at seminaries he just assumes now that the great majority of the men either have or are using it because it's just that prevalent.  Then there's simply lusting in one's heart...

Those are just the various permutations of sexual sin, not even talking about those listed above that other people may or may not find visible.  I agree that fornication is held up as the _serious_ sin, the one where if you do that, you must be really bad.  I believe there are reasons for being extra wary of fornication, but I also agree that we need to do the more basic work of sanctification, because no one who is walking closely with the Lord will be fornicating.


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## Jynlnd13 (Oct 18, 2011)

.............................


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## dicapr (Oct 18, 2011)

I think it is unfair to lump all christians who have had premarital sex into one group.  Not everyone went into the situation thinking "I'm going to do me".  I have talked to several people who had no intentions of having sex before marriage only to get "caught up" in a situation.  To say that it is a lack of fear or that these individuals are less of a Christian is unfounded. Unless you know exactly what is going on within an individual you cannot judge their reason behind their actions.  Call sin a sin but be careful how you lable the sinner.


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## Jynlnd13 (Oct 19, 2011)

..................................


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## Iwanthealthyhair67 (Oct 19, 2011)

Honestly I mean no offense, nothing to do with you it's just that your comment is similar to many that I see on Christian boards, people not intending to sin etc.... but why do we continue to 'put' ourselves in certain situations and end up in sin, if he and he DOES provides a way of escape why don't we take it...why are we falling more and escaping less...





dicapr said:


> I think it is unfair to lump all christians who have had premarital sex into one group. Not everyone went into the situation thinking "I'm going to do me". I have talked to several people who had no intentions of having sex before marriage only to get "caught up" in a situation. To say that it is a lack of fear or that these individuals are less of a Christian is unfounded. Unless you know exactly what is going on within an individual you cannot judge their reason behind their actions. Call sin a sin but be careful how you lable the sinner.


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## fifi134 (Oct 19, 2011)

No one gets caught up into sinning as if it's something unavoidable. 1 Corinthians 10:13 tells us we have the power of God to not let our temptation turn into sin.


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## LucieLoo12 (Oct 19, 2011)

This is so true. 
the bible says He is able to keep you from falling. The bible speaks of Christians being able to overcome the sins and temptations of this world. But some times people act is if we have to live a life of continual falling, like it almost normal to sin everyday..

Yes as Christians we have struggles, and we can make mistakes.But its shouldnt be a life style of falling...Alot of times we fall because we put ourself in the middle of our weaknesses. it comes a time when Christ gives you strength in your weaknesses and you OVERCOME them

The bible says " Can a man put fire in his bosom and not be burned"? Can we continue to play with our weaknesses and not end up in sin? Can man continue in sin that grace may abound? God forbid.


There are somethings I dont entertain since Ive been saved. Some people say, You over reacting,you too extreme....ect, but Im trying to keep the delieverance Christ has given me.For example, I dont watch "love movies"...why? because I dont have time to sit around in despair and battle about not being married or wondering "I wonder what it would be like ....."(THIS IS WHAT I DO FOR ME ) The bible says "Lay aside every sin AND weight that easily besets you.." Is having dinner with a man a sin? Of course not. But you wont find me doing it because I wanna keep myself before God.It can be a weight to me. I dont put myself into situations to fall..

(Example)Betty Jane made have had sex with Billy Joe. Betty Jane says afterward" Oh my! How did this happen??? Betty Jane dont tell you her and Billy Joe was hugged up on the couch in a dark room watching movies either. The devil cant make us do nothing, we have to yield to the tricks/ snares he throws our way. The bible also says, we are enticed and drawn away by our OWN lusts..thats why we have to born again, and empowered with the Holy Spirit to have our heart and mind and desires changed.




Iwanthealthyhair67 said:


> Honestly I mean no offense, nothing to do with you it's just that your comment is similar to many that I see on Christian boards, people not intending to sin etc.... but I am not sure why we keep 'putting' ourselves in certain situations and end up in sin, if he and he DOES provides a way of escape why don't we take it...why are we falling more and escaping less...


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## Nice & Wavy (Oct 19, 2011)

Alicialynn86 said:


> This is so true.
> the bible says He is able to keep you from falling. The bible speaks of Christians being able to overcome the sins and temptations of this world. But some times people act is if we have to live a life of continual falling, like it almost normal to sin everyday..
> 
> Yes as Christians we have struggles, and we can make mistakes.But its shouldnt be a life style of falling...Alot of times we fall because we put ourself in the middle of our weaknesses. it comes a time when Christ gives you strength in your weaknesses and you OVERCOME them
> ...


I'm very married and WE don't watch many "love movies" because of some of the suggestive thoughts that are placed in many of these movies.  I want singles to know that married couples can experience foul things planted in the mind, just as much as anyone else.  So, we are mindful of what we watch, read and listen to, so that we don't fall into temptations.


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## Iwanthealthyhair67 (Oct 19, 2011)

ITA...we all have to take a stand, there are simple things that we can do...I don't watch love movies either and if someone is making out I switch channels, I'm careful what I watch and what I listen to which is all a part of protecting the eye and ear gates...

Imo 'dates' should be chaperoned yes chaperoned, even when you get engaged especially then ... 'petting' is foreplay = arousal which can lead to sex, if your hand is 'light' don't work with money, just like alcoholics should stay away from alcohol...

We need to make more an effort we are equipped with everything pertaining to life AND godliness we have power AND authority YET our struggles are still so great ...




Alicialynn86 said:


> This is so true.
> the bible says He is able to keep you from falling. The bible speaks of Christians being able to overcome the sins and temptations of this world. But some times people act is if we have to live a life of continual falling, like it almost normal to sin everyday..
> 
> Yes as Christians we have struggles, and we can make mistakes.But its shouldnt be a life style of falling...Alot of times we fall because we put ourself in the middle of our weaknesses
> ...


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## LucieLoo12 (Oct 19, 2011)

That is so good @ nice&Wavy!!! I see you really have a standard!!




Nice & Wavy said:


> I'm very married and WE don't watch many "love movies" because of some of the suggestive thoughts that are placed in many of these movies. I want singles to know that married couples can experience foul things planted in the mind, just as much as anyone else. So, we are mindful of what we watch, read and listen to, so that we don't fall into temptations.


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## Nice & Wavy (Oct 19, 2011)

Alicialynn86 said:


> That is so good @ nice&Wavy!!! I see you really have a standard!!


If we as believers don't have a standard against these things, we will constantly fall for the okey-dokey by the enemy.

The bible tells us to *"Cast down imaginations, and every high thing that exalt itself  against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought  to the obedience of Christ."

*Imaginations come from what we "see".  Our eye gates must be protected as much as possible, however...we know that that's almost impossible because we see so many things on a daily basis.  But, we can CHOOSE what we watch, thereby we cast it down.


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## dicapr (Oct 19, 2011)

fifi134 said:


> No one gets caught up into sinning as if it's something unavoidable. 1 Corinthians 10:13 tells us we have the power of God to not let our temptation turn into sin.


 

Sin is avoidable but the bible tells us that there is no one who hasn't fallen short or is sinless.  We all sin.  Just because you don't commit a "big" sin doesn't make it any better.  We talk about self control when it comes to premarital sex but that goes with sin across the board.  If anyone has ever sinned they have had a lapse in self control.  We are all in the same boat.


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## LucieLoo12 (Oct 19, 2011)

The bible says 
*Romans 3:23*
For all have sinn*ed*, and come short of the glory of God;

thats past tense. 

it doesnt say all is sinning and come short. Of course before we saved we did, but when you become save, God expects more from us.
you are absolutely right, no sin is greater than the other. Sin is sin. 

But no one ever has to stay bound to sin, that why Christ came, to free us from our sin.


1st John 3V9
*9*Whosoever is born of God doth not commit sin; for his seed remaineth in him: and he cannot sin, because he is born of God


Im not saying all this to make you "look bad"...i sincerely want you to know the truth, because someone had to tell me the truth as well.



dicapr said:


> Sin is avoidable but the bible tells us that there is no one who hasn't fallen short or is sinless. We all sin. Just because you don't commit a "big" sin doesn't make it any better. We talk about self control when it comes to premarital sex but that goes with sin across the board. If anyone has ever sinned they have had a lapse in self control. We are all in the same boat.


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## dicapr (Oct 19, 2011)

I agree that we should not continue in sin or even practice sin.  But as a Christian to sit there and act that when you got saved you stopped making bad choices and stopped sinning just proves that you are not being honest with yourself and others.  Did not Peter deny Christ?  Was he not called out about his attitude toward non-Jews?  Was not David a man after God's own heart when he committed adultry and murdered the woman's husband? There and always has been deliverance from sin.  I believe that with all my heart.  However, I am not going to pretend that being saved means you never fall short or sin.  I no longer practice sinning-but it doesn't mean that in a moment of weakness I haven't made a bad decison and fallen short.  I do not use profanity but there have been times that something has popped into my mind.  While I do not cuss people out (practicing sin) dropping a pot on my foot may enlicite a poor response.  This is the fine line I am talking about.  The article only speaks that christians are not waiting until marriage, but we have no idea about the state of those who have fallen short.  That is why I feel it is more constructive to figure out what we can do to address the problem rather than judging their relationship with Christ.  Just because you do not/did not commit "that" sin doesn't give you the right to judge someone's struggle.  (The you is general, I don't know whether you judge or not).  We as humans tend to make excuses for struggles we understand or struggle with ourselves and judge harshly struggles we have overcome or are not a issue with us.


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## Poohbear (Oct 19, 2011)

Alicialynn86 - do you not sin anymore? I think that's where some of the confusion may lie in this thread.

I have came across those same verses in the Bible that you posted in your post #48 in this thread.  I have been going back and forth with the idea of whether or not a true Christian sins or not... whether its daily, once a week, once a month, once a year, whatever. Are they a true Christian regardless of how often they sin or what sin it is?  And I know I've asked this question before several times in other threads, but it really racks my brain sometimes after diving in deeper in the word of God and meeting people with different views on the concept of sin.

And I may have asked you this before in a thread but can't remember which thread it was, but I remember you saying how some people are not living sold out to Christ... what does it mean to you to be sold out to Christ as it relates to a Christian sinning?


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## Rainbow Dash (Oct 19, 2011)

It starts inside, the Christian has let their guard down in an area. That is why we are to guard our minds and hearts so that we will not be drawn into sin or allow strongholds to build. That is why we have to check ourselves and ensure that we are walking in the Way. It can happen to anyone if they are not guarded by Word and Spirit of God. The bible says "but each one is tempted when, by *his own evil desire,* *he is dragged away and enticed*. 15 Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death." James 1:14-15. That is why we are to cast down imaginations, and thoughts that exalt themselves against God and His word.


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## LucieLoo12 (Oct 20, 2011)

If you refer to my previous post in this same thread, I have stated that yes we as Christians have struggles, but shouldnt live a LIFESTYLE of continual sin..but their is victory in Christ. He strengthens you to overcome. All is sin is by CHOICE, the devil dont twists our hands behind our back and make us do anything. In the moment of our weakeness, there is still a decision to do it or not. We make the choice to sin. Yes to due to many bondages we can have a hard time saying no, ive been there. BUT i also believe that you dont stay weak to the same thing your whole christian life, and if that is the case, then it because we have surrendered that "area" to God. When the woman was caught in Adultery YES Christ realized she was wrong, and He forgave her, but He also told her to go and SIN NO MORE. And that was before the Holy Ghost was given...how much more now???


I never never never never judge anyone's struggle. I simply replied to the thread as many others do, but because I stated WITH SCRIPTURE, that sin is something we dont have to do...im wrong? I will apologize if you are misunderstanding what I am saying, but I wont apologize for what the bible says..Im sorry. The words say he that is born of God, is not committed to sin...committed meaning a lifestyle of sin.I feel like I am not judging, but giving someone hope. You dont have to "deal" with any sin, but you can be made free...




dicapr said:


> I agree that we should not continue in sin or even practice sin. But as a Christian to sit there and act that when you got saved you stopped making bad choices and stopped sinning just proves that you are not being honest with yourself and others. Did not Peter deny Christ? Was he not called out about his attitude toward non-Jews? Was not David a man after God's own heart when he committed adultry and murdered the woman's husband? There and always has been deliverance from sin. I believe that with all my heart. However, I am not going to pretend that being saved means you never fall short or sin. I no longer practice sinning-but it doesn't mean that in a moment of weakness I haven't made a bad decison and fallen short. I do not use profanity but there have been times that something has popped into my mind. While I do not cuss people out (practicing sin) dropping a pot on my foot may enlicite a poor response. This is the fine line I am talking about. The article only speaks that christians are not waiting until marriage, but we have no idea about the state of those who have fallen short. That is why I feel it is more constructive to figure out what we can do to address the problem rather than judging their relationship with Christ. Just because you do not/did not commit "that" sin doesn't give you the right to judge someone's struggle. (The you is general, I don't know whether you judge or not). We as humans tend to make excuses for struggles we understand or struggle with ourselves and judge harshly struggles we have overcome or are not a issue with us.


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## LucieLoo12 (Oct 20, 2011)

First I want to say that by no means have I "made it" or Im just squeaky clean in every area of my life. I cry out to God for deliverance and I need help, because its a true battle between the flesh and the spirit. But what I will say is this, as God shows me what I need to work on, I get those things right. I dont justify myself, my sin, or my wrong. But I line it up with the word of God, and if it dont line up, im forsaking it. Alot of times when I may quote a scripture to someone doesnt mean that I have conquered that scripture, but i tell you one thing, Im striving to line up with it. Striving means a painstaking effort to perform. That means Im doing everything I can to make the scriptures performed in my life. I never justify my error or way or doing it. I DONT make excuses for sin..because there is no excuse. You think God sent his ONLY son to die so we can struggle our lives, but he said He came to give us life more abundantly. Alot of things I say isnt popular, but all I care about is truth. 


Now let me answer your questions boo 
*Are they a true Christian regardless of how often they sin or what sin it is*? Now when you "they" , I CANT say per say, because I dont who they are..Alot of times when I am replying in the threads I am speaking on a GENERAL term.The bible says the LORD know them that are His. Paul persecuted Christians but he sincerely thought he was doing the will of God.But he was a chosen vessel from God, and God changed him.So GENERALLY speaking, I myself, was not raised in church, had no church background, never went to church and I thought I was a Christian. Why because society taught me, as long as you "believe" you a Christian, but the bible says the devils believe and tremble too..So what seperated me from the devils? But I will say this, the bible says, the sheep know HIS VOICE. WHen the gospel of Jesus Christ was shared with me, and God began to enlightened me about things, I began to deny those ungoldly works,because I was a sheep.Yes, i had struggles,...still struggle with things but im walking in my delieverance and RESISTING IT but like i stated earlier, as God shows me what is wrong, i put them away. And it not by my strength, but its through prayer and fasting So, I will say this....

Everyone keep saying "struggle" 

Struggles means *. *To be strenuously engaged with a problem, task, or undertaking: *3. *To make a strenuous effort; strive: *4. *To contend or compete:

Now we see struggles means fighting against, not just settling for.So if someone is stuggling with sin, it means they are resisting it, even though the the urge may be coming up, they are fighting against, not just giving into it easily. Thats a struggle..But if someone is willingly going to the club and getting drunk every week, planning for the next weekend to come to do the same thing..is that a struggle with sin or blatant sin? (JUST EXAMPLE) Or someone stuggling with anger? The know they have problems with this particular person, do they resist the urge to go off on them, or walk away, or do they plan the harsh words for the next time they see them? Struggle or will-full sin?

Again and again and again i will say...yes we have some struggles,but the bible says those who hunger and thrist after righteousness shall be filled. If you have a hunger to be made free God will free you! Some delievreance dont happen over night.When I came to God, the sin of cursing and drinking was removed immediately (My testimony) but the sin of anger and unforgivness was something I had to fast and pray to be free from and it had to be uprooted out of me. I have to remind my self that on the last day when I stand before God , no excuse will stand. God will do everything in his power to save us, we just have to grab a hold of his salvation


Sin is sin. There is no sin greater than the other. the child molester is just as bad in the eyes of God as the liar.We have taught ourselves bad habits, but the same way we taught ourselves bad things, we can teach it good things as well

People think you trying to "holier than thou" when you tell them you dont have to sin. But I tell them because I been at the bottom of the barrel..I been quenched with sin, but i would be doing Jesus an injustice if I say you couldnt be made free. I would be "dimming" my testimony, if I didnt tell you I wasnt bound any more..and I wont do that. If i say "yea u gotta sin", I would be slapping Christ in the face because thats not true

any more questions please let me know....



Poohbear said:


> @Alicialynn86 - do you not sin anymore? I think that's where some of the confusion may lie in this thread.
> 
> I have came across those same verses in the Bible that you posted in your post #48 in this thread. I have been going back and forth with the idea of whether or not a true Christian sins or not... whether its daily, once a week, once a month, once a year, whatever. Are they a true Christian regardless of how often they sin or what sin it is? And I know I've asked this question before several times in other threads, but it really racks my brain sometimes after diving in deeper in the word of God and meeting people with different views on the concept of sin.
> 
> And I may have asked you this before in a thread but can't remember which thread it was, but I remember you saying how some people are not living sold out to Christ... what does it mean to you to be sold out to Christ as it relates to a Christian sinning?


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## natura87 (Oct 20, 2011)

Poohbear said:


> They need to stop teaching that it's "okay" to sin as long as you believe in Jesus, and that Jesus will forgive you over and over and over again.



I'm not even Christian...but  THISSSSSs 10000000 TIMES!!!


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## Poohbear (Oct 20, 2011)

Alicialynn86 said:


> First I want to say that by no means have I "made it" or Im just squeaky clean in every area of my life. I cry out to God for deliverance and I need help, because its a true battle between the flesh and the spirit. But what I will say is this, as God shows me what I need to work on, I get those things right. I dont justify myself, my sin, or my wrong. But I line it up with the word of God, and if it dont line up, im forsaking it. Alot of times when I may quote a scripture to someone doesnt mean that I have conquered that scripture, but i tell you one thing, Im striving to line up with it. Striving means a painstaking effort to perform. That means Im doing everything I can to make the scriptures performed in my life. I never justify my error or way or doing it. I DONT make excuses for sin..because there is no excuse. You think God sent his ONLY son to die so we can struggle our lives, but he said He came to give us life more abundantly. Alot of things I say isnt popular, but all I care about is truth.
> 
> 
> *Now let me answer your questions boo *
> ...


Not sure why you referred to me as "boo", but thanks for answering some of my questions.

When I said "they" I meant "Christians".

I also hear Christians who always talk about this "struggle" with sin. I know there are some who are fighting against it by resisting it and not doing what their flesh wants them to do as you have pointed out, but I know there are some Christians who say they are struggling with sin who are really willingly giving in and enjoying the sin.


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## LucieLoo12 (Oct 20, 2011)

I didnt mean anything when I said "boo", sorry it offended you.






Poohbear said:


> Not sure why you referred to me as "boo", but thanks for answering some of my questions.
> 
> When I said "they" I meant "Christians".
> 
> I also hear Christians who always talk about this "struggle" with sin. I know there are some who are fighting against it by resisting it and not doing what their flesh wants them to do as you have pointed out, but I know there are some Christians who say they are struggling with sin who are really willingly giving in and enjoying the sin.


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