# Married "Videos" ... HELP!



## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 3, 2009)

This maybe a silly question for you all but here goes.....

My hubby and I are Christians and happily married for over 2 years.  We play a very active role in the church but yet I did not know how to answer this question that he asked...  My hubby asked me yesterday if making our own "videos" would be the same as watching X rated films (He knows thats a NO-NO, but he figures making our own is okay)? I really didn't know what to say.. so I decided I'd come on here and ask you ladies..  Please help a sista AND brotha out..


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## Laela (Aug 3, 2009)

*Hebrews 13:4*
Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer _and _all the sexually immoral.

This is something you and your husband need to pray to God about. 






Mrs.TheBronx said:


> This maybe a silly question for you all but here goes.....
> 
> My hubby and I are Christians and happily married for over 2 years.  We play a very active role in the church but yet I did not know how to answer this question that he asked...  My hubby asked me yesterday if making our own "videos" would be the same as watching X rated films (He knows thats a NO-NO, but he figures making our own is okay)? I really didn't know what to say.. so I decided I'd come on here and ask you ladies..  Please help a sista AND brotha out..


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 3, 2009)

Thanks Laela, I am familiar with that scripture... what part of it makes it impure? Is it the video part, or watchin ourselve after? I am just askin for clarification. I see alot of people viewed this post, but have not replied, so I guess either alot of people don't know or i just asked a really bad question.. I was told ignorance is not bliss and no questions is a silly one.. I hope you all know that this is simply a question looking for it to be answered.. Thanks all.. Thanks ladies..


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## Mai Tai (Aug 3, 2009)

Mrs. TheBronx,

I think your question is an EXCELLENT one.  Sorry I cannot offer a valid answer.  I just wanted to let you know that i'm sure someone will be able to help you with a real-time answer.  I want to know the answer to this too...


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 3, 2009)

Mai Tai said:


> Mrs. TheBronx,
> 
> I think your question is an EXCELLENT one. Sorry I cannot offer a valid answer. I just wanted to let you know that i'm sure someone will be able to help you with a real-time answer. I want to know the answer to this too...


 
Thanks so much honee! I'm so glad that someone else interested in the answer too.


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## BeautifulFlower (Aug 3, 2009)

One of my favorite ministers said whatever promotes oneness in the bedroom he believes is good and godly within a marriege. Oneness meaning a closeness between the two of you and no others. If this idea makes you uncomfortable and like a sex object, this doesnt promote oneness. If you feel this idea will bring another level of intimacy in your marriage then....

But that a decision you have to come to through prayer and being honest with yourself.


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 3, 2009)

prettyfaceANB said:


> One of my favorite ministers said whatever promotes oneness in the bedroom he believes is good and godly within a marriege. Oneness meaning a closeness between the two of you and no others. If this idea makes you uncomfortable and like a sex object, this doesnt promote oneness. If you feel this idea will bring another level of intimacy in your marriage then....
> 
> But that a decision you have to come to through prayer and being honest with yourself.


 

Thank you for this comment Prettyface


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## Laela (Aug 3, 2009)

I don't think that's a bad question, just a very personal one... it's like me asking folks if I should put a tattoo on my labia.   Anyone who would do it, would tell me yes and anyone who wouldn't would tell me no.

But I will say if you two are worried that it's something bad to do, it likely is. I truly think you should pray..Look to man, not God for anything concerning your marriage.

The Bible talks about sexual impropriety and I believe that can occur EVEN in a marriage....If you feel you really need answer from someone, maybe talking to a marriage counselor would be helpful.  




Mrs.TheBronx said:


> Thanks Laela, I am familiar with that scripture... what part of it makes it impure? Is it the video part, or watchin ourselve after? I am just askin for clarification. I see alot of people viewed this post, but have not replied, so I guess either alot of people don't know or i just asked a really bad question.. I was told ignorance is not bliss and no questions is a silly one.. I hope you all know that this is simply a question looking for it to be answered.. Thanks all.. Thanks ladies..


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 3, 2009)

Laela said:


> I don't think that's a bad question, just a very personal one... it's like me asking folks if I should put a tattoo on my labia.  Anyone who would do it, would tell me yes and anyone who wouldn't would tell me no.
> 
> I really wasn't looking for people who agree or disagree, just looking for opinions, because I know for a fact that others have the same questions.. We are to ask away... especially to our Christian sistas and brothas.  If I was going to ask, (personal or non personal questions) I felt the most comfortable coming here asking my sistas.
> 
> ...


 
So I am assuming in your marriage (If you are married) that this question is what you call sexually immoral? Correct me if I'm wrong..  Thank you so much for giving me your opinions!  I appreciate it. This last post is for my sista Laela..


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## Laela (Aug 3, 2009)

I'm married and we've discussed something like that before and it's a "heck no" for us. IMHO, if a Christian married couple were to record themselves, that recording actually becomes "porn" -- from the Greek word _porneia_. And worse, if it gets in the wrong hands or seen by anyone other than them. That's a risk I'm not taking. The Bible says if a man is to lust, let him take a wife. My very presence is visual aid enough..  

HTH!






Mrs.TheBronx said:


> So I am assuming in your marriage (If you are married) that this question is what you call sexually immoral? Correct me if I'm wrong..


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## Netta1 (Aug 3, 2009)

Laela said:


> I don't think that's a bad question, just a very personal one... it's like me asking folks if I should put a tattoo on my labia.   Anyone who would do it, would tell me yes and anyone who wouldn't would tell me no.
> 
> But I will say if you two are worried that it's something bad to do, it likely is. *I truly think you should pray * Look to man, not God for anything concerning your marriage.
> 
> The Bible talks about sexual impropriety and I believe that can occur EVEN in a marriage....If you feel you really need answer from someone, maybe talking to a marriage counselor would be helpful.



I have to agree with Laela here @ bolded.  I do not have one answer for ya, LOL. What goes on in your bed is between you, God, and your husband.  If I were you I would just seek God (both you and your husband) and ask him.  I hope you find your answer and some really good lighting LOL  ...j/k


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## Shimmie (Aug 3, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> This maybe a silly question for you all but here goes.....
> 
> My hubby and I are Christians and happily married for over 2 years. We play a very active role in the church but yet I did not know how to answer this question that he asked... My hubby asked me yesterday if making our own "videos" would be the same as watching X rated films (He knows thats a NO-NO, but he figures making our own is okay)? I really didn't know what to say.. so I decided I'd come on here and ask you ladies.. Please help a sista AND brotha out..


I wouldn't worry so much about making the tape as I would about where it might end up.     Making the tape is your 'married business' and it is the two of you and no one else.   All I can offer is to say, PLEASE watch where you leave it.   

DVD's and tapes have a way of ending up 'somewhere' else.   :blush3:   We 'forget' it's in the DVD player; go to sleep, wake up and leave for work.  Someone comes in and has a show.         It could end up in a Tyler Perry movie's DVD case or worse, _Our Visit to Disney_   and ends up in the DVD player during Movie Night with friends or family....  

I'm not saying that's is okay or not okay.  However, it's your *'Married Business'*.   Just put a code on it or something that keeps no one else from having accidental access to it.  

And please don't have your hair wrapped.   Put on a show.  Make it memorable.  When you're both 99 you'll have something to remember that you almost forgot that you could do.


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## BrooklynSouth (Aug 3, 2009)

*No way should you leave a video trail!!!!!!!!!*


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## MrsHdrLe (Aug 3, 2009)

This is a personal one, but I guess I would ask your husband why a video when he can have the "real deal"?  I guess the pupose of it makes me wonder.  If you do, I suggest you get rid of it asap afterward.


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## Shimmie (Aug 3, 2009)

BrooklynSouth said:


> *No way should you leave a video trail!!!!!!!!!*


 


angiet1985 said:


> This is a personal one, but I guess I would ask your husband why a video when he can have the "real deal"? I guess the pupose of it makes me wonder. If you do, I suggest you get rid of it asap afterward.


I agree; I'd be terrified and quite resistant.   

But if they do, I can't condemn them.  They're married and entitled. God bless their marriage with purity and eternal love.  :Rose:


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> I wouldn't worry so much about making the tape as I would about where it might end up.  Making the tape is your 'married business' and it is the two of you and no one else. All I can offer is to say, PLEASE watch where you leave it.
> 
> DVD's and tapes have a way of ending up 'somewhere' else. :blush3: We 'forget' it's in the DVD player; go to sleep, wake up and leave for work. Someone comes in and has a show.   It could end up in a Tyler Perry movie's DVD case or worse, _Our Visit to Disney_  and ends up in the DVD player during Movie Night with friends or family....
> 
> ...


 
Im sorry Shimmie! U had me crackin up!!!!!!!!!!!!! That is sooo funny especially the last sentence.. hehehe!


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

angiet1985 said:


> This is a personal one, but I guess I would ask your husband why a video when he can have the "real deal"? I guess the pupose of it makes me wonder. If you do, I suggest you get rid of it asap afterward.


 
Girl i can't tell u what goes on these men's heads! They are all loco sometimes! LOL but thanks honee!


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

BrooklynSouth said:


> *No way should you leave a video trail!!!!!!!!!*


 
LMBO!! I know right


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

Thank you all for your replies and opinions!!!!!!!!!!!


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## Shimmie (Aug 4, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> Im sorry Shimmie! U had me crackin up!!!!!!!!!!!!! That is sooo funny especially the last sentence.. hehehe!


 
  Well IF you have to have a 'scarf', you may as well make it worth it.    You could always do a 'Dance of the Seven Veils".   :reddancer: 

It's really a beautiful classic and your husband would love this.    

I guess my question is, "Is the Marriage 'Boudoir' pornographic?   Only if others are there.   What happens between you and your husband is between you and your husband and God the Father, and nobody else.  

This means *no "updates*" to this thread....  We don't want a mini-series up here.  

Blessings on your marriage is all I really have to offer.   Keep it alive and happy.   :Rose:


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> Well IF you have to have a 'scarf', you may as well make it worth it. You could always do a 'Dance of the Seven Veils". :reddancer:
> 
> It's really a beautiful classic and your husband would lovethis.
> 
> ...


 

LOL @ the no updates!!!!!!!!!!!!! LMBO!!


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## Shimmie (Aug 4, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> LOL @ the no updates!!!!!!!!!!!!! LMBO!!


  What happens in de' Bronx, stays in Vegas!  

No replies such as this...

"This thread is worthless without pictures"  

 

or   



No thread updates....


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> What happens in de' Bronx, stays in Vegas!
> 
> No replies such as this...
> 
> ...


 

LMBO!!! yes i totally AGREE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHH HAHAHAHAHAHA!


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## mrselle (Aug 4, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> Well IF you have to have a 'scarf', you may as well make it worth it.    You could always do a 'Dance of the Seven Veils".   :reddancer:
> 
> It's really a beautiful classic and your husband would love this.
> 
> ...



You are hilarious.  I know my coworkers are trying to figure out why I'm laughing all by myself.


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 4, 2009)

Shimmie, you are the best!

Mrs.TheBronx,

You and your husband are blessed.


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 4, 2009)

mrselle said:


> You are hilarious. I know my coworkers are trying to figure out why I'm laughing all by myself.




Me too, girl...me too


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## blazingthru (Aug 4, 2009)

I am really not trying to offend anyone but we know that God will judge the marriage bed and lovemaking between husband and wife is a gift from God. God gives and God takes away.  God has blessed you with a great partner, Porn is part of satan's world we have nothing to do with anything that is part of satan's word. He loves to glorify himself.  Making a porn movie ( even if you are gentle and loving one another) is glorifying self.  Thats Part of Satan and sin which God has no part of and will destroy.  Even if there is nothing in either of your minds about porn it is still that. we always have to be careful about what we do.  Satan has a way to make sure what we really want hidden to show up for everyone to see anyway.  May God's truths bless you in your decisions. We are called to live our lives in such a way to be a blessing to others who see us.


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## Shimmie (Aug 4, 2009)

mrselle said:


> You are hilarious. I know my coworkers are trying to figure out why I'm laughing all by myself.


 


Nice & Wavy said:


> Shimmie, you are the best!
> 
> Mrs.TheBronx,
> 
> You and your husband are blessed.


 


Nice & Wavy said:


> Me too, girl...me too


 
:blush3:   What?   What?  What I do?  What I say?    

I just hope the camera doesn't fall off the Tripod....   

Leave out the faces....   You'll have no traces.    No public Fotki's; it may get hacked.


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

blazingthru said:


> I am really not trying to offend anyone but we know that God will judge the marriage bed and lovemaking between husband and wife is a gift from God. God gives and God takes away. God has blessed you with a great partner, Porn is part of satan's world we have nothing to do with anything that is part of satan's word. He loves to glorify himself. Making a porn movie ( even if you are gentle and loving one another) is glorifying self. Thats Part of Satan and sin which God has no part of and will destroy. Even if there is nothing in either of your minds about porn it is still that. we always have to be careful about what we do. Satan has a way to make sure what we really want hidden to show up for everyone to see anyway. May God's truths bless you in your decisions. We are called to live our lives in such a way to be a blessing to others who see us.


 

Thank so much for your opinion Blazin.. A co-worker and I wanted to know which part of it makes it un Godly? Is it the taping part or the watching part? I know its not the act itself between a husband and a wife. (i do know that much) lol but seriously, im asking because I'd like to know what you all think.  

Thanks so much for all of yout time and explainations!  This is what its about, learning from one another and getting other view points on subjects.


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> :blush3: What? What? What I do? What I say?
> 
> I just hope the camera doean't fall of the Tripod....
> 
> Leave out the faces....  You'll have no traces. No public Fotki's; it may get hacked.


 
LMBO!!! Shimmie u are tooooooooo FUNNY!!


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## Prudent1 (Aug 4, 2009)

My co-workers are peeking at me too right now. They'll be aiight tho'. There are 2 sermons from Pastor Mark Driskoll of Mars Hill Church. He has som excellent sermons on marital relations. One series called  _Proverbs_, and one in a series called _The Peasant Princess_. If you get a chance check out both series in their entirety. His sermons are long but never boring and always line up with God's word.  It answered some things for me and I learned some new stuff for Mr Prudent1 whenever he finds me... 

HTH,
Prudent1
Oh yeah, please don't ever think you have asked a bad question... sometimes we have to pray for guidance before we answer. Especially in the area of marriage b/c it is such an important institute to God. I'm not going to stand before God and be at fault for giving someone unsound marital advice. 

http://www.marshillchurch.org/media/proverbs/lovemaking

I think you should listen to all of peasant princess series...


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## Shimmie (Aug 4, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> LMBO!!! Shimmie u are tooooooooo FUNNY!!


   Enjoy your hubby.   He can't help but laugh at this thread, cause we don't know the answer...  

I've been stumped before but never like this.


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## divya (Aug 4, 2009)

Deleted...received further clarification. Please forgive me.


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

Prudent1 said:


> My co-workers are peeking at me too right now. They'll be aiight tho'. There are 2 sermons from Pastor Mark Driskoll of Mars Hill Church. He has som excellent sermons on marital relations. One series called _Proverbs_, and one in a series called _The Peasant Princess_. If you get a chance check out both series in their entirety. His sermons are long but never boring and always line up with God's word.  It answered some things for me and I learned some new stuff for Mr Prudent1 whenever he finds me...
> 
> HTH,
> Prudent1
> ...


 

Thanks honee! Thats great! I will give that a shot!


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

divya said:


> So this is a movie that _only_ you and your husband will be making and _only_ you two will be watching? Hebrews 13:4 leaves it between the both of you, in my understanding.
> 
> This is a touchy topic though so maybe speaking to a Christian marriage counselor may help to clarify this issue for you and your husband. Married couples can and do come to different conclusions.
> 
> ...


 
Yes, this would strictly be for my hubby and I ONLY!!!!!!!!!! 
thank u for your input divya!


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 4, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> :blush3: What? What? What I do? What I say?
> 
> I just hope the camera doean't fall of the Tripod....
> 
> Leave out the faces....  You'll have no traces. No public Fotki's; it may get hacked.


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

Nice & Wavy said:


>


 

That was hilarious!


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## divya (Aug 4, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> Yes, this would strictly be for my hubby and I ONLY!!!!!!!!!!
> thank u for your input divya!



Sorry, I changed mind on this. I just sought further clarity on the matter. Not married...and did not fully understand what porn really is. 

Again my apologies.


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## Laela (Aug 4, 2009)

I had a chat w/ hubby about this thread last night and he was cracking up.. It really is pornography because it's recorded:
[_pornei _+ _graphy_, which means recorded/written).

BUT if the couple is viewing *themselves*, they're only lusting after themselves, as opposed to watching /lusting after another couple on tape, I can't see anything wrong. I just wouldn't personally do it. 

It's really a fine line, and I appreciate your statement. I'm not condemning anyone for what they do in their own marriage bed. You're right...God is the judge on this one. 




blazingthru said:


> I am really not trying to offend anyone but we know that God will judge the marriage bed and lovemaking between husband and wife is a gift from God. God gives and God takes away.  God has blessed you with a great partner, Porn is part of satan's world we have nothing to do with anything that is part of satan's word. He loves to glorify himself.  Making a porn movie ( even if you are gentle and loving one another) is glorifying self.  Thats Part of Satan and sin which God has no part of and will destroy.  Even if there is nothing in either of your minds about porn it is still that. we always have to be careful about what we do.  Satan has a way to make sure what we really want hidden to show up for everyone to see anyway.  May God's truths bless you in your decisions. We are called to live our lives in such a way to be a blessing to others who see us.


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

Laela said:


> I had a chat w/ hubby about this thread last night and he was cracking up.. It really is pornography because it's recorded:
> [_pornei _+ _graphy_, which means recorded/written).
> 
> BUT if the couple is viewing *themselves*, they're only lusting after themselves, as opposed to watching /lusting after another couple on tape, I can't see anything wrong. I just wouldn't personally do it.
> ...


 

Thanks honee, Im glad that you asked your hubby to get his view on it. thanks soo much for your time!  I really appreciated all of the answers/opinions! I guess there is no real answer, just a personal opinion. I guess..


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## divya (Aug 4, 2009)

Laela said:


> I had a chat w/ hubby about this thread last night and he was cracking up..* It really is pornography because it's recorded:
> [pornei + graphy, which means recorded/written).
> *
> BUT if the couple is viewing *themselves*, they're only lusting after themselves, as opposed to watching /lusting after another couple on tape, I can't see anything wrong. I just wouldn't personally do it.
> ...



[email protected] bold. I made a call for clarity on the matter, to make sure that I had a proper understanding.  The actual meaning of the word was explained to me. That's why I had to delete my first post and clarify why after. 

It is easy to get the idea that porn is just what we understand to be the current porn industry, which is watching other people have sexual intercourse (encouraging lust of others). BUT the word pornography is all encompassing.For that reason, I personally would avoid it and recommend avoiding it. Better to err on the side of caution...

Thank you Laela.


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## divya (Aug 4, 2009)

Thank you MsBronx for the thread and to all the ladies. This is why I love CF.  I learn so much about life and how to approach this type of issue. Without this thread, I may have gone into marriage without thinking through the "porn" issue. This thread has provided a clearer understand of what porn is and what needs to be considered in making a decision on this matter.


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## kooskoos (Aug 4, 2009)

Well...the New Testament tells us that the marriage bed is undefiled. I personally take that to mean that pretty much anything is okay. Men are visual creatures, and that's prob why your husband is sooo excited. I think that would a fun and beautiful thing for a couple to do together. I know when I get married, all bets are off--no more of this holding back foolishness


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## divya (Aug 4, 2009)

kooskoos said:


> Well...the New Testament tells us that the marriage bed is undefiled. I personally take that to mean that pretty much anything is okay. Men are visual creatures, and that's prob why your husband is sooo excited. I think that would a fun and beautiful thing for a couple to do together. I know when I get married, all bets are off--no more of this holding back foolishness



Yea, see that was my understanding overall but then, topics like this make me think twice. What about anal sex? That's not acceptable. So there may be a few things that are not in line. Porn may be another one. I suppose, like anything else, we have to look for consistency with all other Scriptures...

Ladies, what do you think about the extent of the verse in Hebrews?


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## Shimmie (Aug 4, 2009)

Laela said:


> I had a chat w/ hubby about this thread last night and he was cracking up.. It really is pornography because it's recorded:
> [_pornei _+ _graphy_, which means recorded/written).
> 
> BUT if the couple is viewing *themselves*, they're only lusting after themselves, as opposed to watching /lusting after another couple on tape, I can't see anything wrong. I just wouldn't personally do it.
> ...


 It's a very fine line ... indeed.

*Questions:*  These are just 'thoughts' as a result of this topic. 

It's wrong for a man to 'uncover' a woman (look at a naked woman) other than his wife.     Hubands and wives are naked with each other all of the time.   

 Genesis:  2:25  "and the husband and wife were naked and were not ashamed." 

When making love, men love to watch their wives in movement.  They even lift themselves up to view what she looks like, as far as his eyes will allow him to.    Men are sight stimulated by nature.  

What about men who have naked pictures of their wives?   Especially those overseas in the military?    Husbands who travel?   These men guard these pictures with their lives.  

I guess my question is this:  Is it the recording of a husband watching his wife naked a sin?   A picture?    If he watches her 'live' while she's naked, is that sin too?  

The definition of p' ography does have impact.   'graphy' to record (or to write) as in stenography, videography, caligraphy.      

Instead of porn' ography, perhaps 'Mar'nography' ('Matrimony 'Written")

I can't justify anything that is sin and I won't.  My Ministry is Marriage it's a gift that God has entrusted me with and God uses me in this area and with familiers to His glory.    Somehow, a man and wife should be freer to enjoy the beauty and the gift of loving each other than the world does.    

The world has taken everything beautiful that God has given us and has perverted it.   Porn is industrial sin; a meat market full of disgust and diseases and putrid lust.   

Marriage is beautiful and truly a gift from God.  



Just don't leave the tape in the machine.


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## kooskoos (Aug 4, 2009)

divya said:


> Yea, see that was my understanding overall but then, topics like this make me think twice. What about anal sex? That's not acceptable. So there may be a few things that are not in line. Porn may be another one. I suppose, like anything else, we have to look for consistency with all other Scriptures...
> 
> Ladies, what do you think about the extent of the verse in Hebrews?


 
I guess it depends on the couple, and what God tells that couple. I don't believe in anal sex based on the way I've been socialized and my own culture, but what about oral sex? I know of some married couples who find great intimacy in performing that act for each other. Or what about masturbation while your husband is away, or letting him watch you do that? Is that wrong as well? 

I dunno...all I can say is go with God. I won't judge what you do in the bedroom, 'cause it's your business at the end of the day. I just guess I won't be telling you ladies what I'm up to once I get married  ...cause I'm going all out


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> It's a very fine line ... indeed.
> 
> *Questions:* These are just 'thoughts' as a result of this topic.
> 
> ...


 
WOW Shimmie u must be in my head! Great posed questions! Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

kooskoos said:


> I guess it depends on the couple, and what God tells that couple. I don't believe in anal sex based on the way I've been socialized and my own culture, but what about oral sex? I know of some married couples who find great intimacy in performing that act for each other. Or what about masturbation while your husband is away, or letting him watch you do that? Is that wrong as well?
> 
> I dunno...all I can say is go with God. I won't judge what you do in the bedroom, 'cause it's your business at the end of the day. I just guess I won't be telling you ladies what I'm up to once I get married  ...cause I'm going all out


 
Great questions tooo Kooskoos!!! Anyone have any opinions on Shimmie and Kooskoos questions?? 

Thanks so much again ladies for shedding light on this for me!


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## blazingthru (Aug 4, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> Thank so much for your opinion Blazin.. A co-worker and I wanted to know which part of it makes it un Godly? Is it the taping part or the watching part? I know its not the act itself between a husband and a wife. (i do know that much) lol but seriously, im asking because I'd like to know what you all think.
> 
> Thanks so much for all of yout time and explainations!  This is what its about, learning from one another and getting other view points on subjects.


 i think it would be both, Taping it and watching it.  What would be the purpose and if you do this you will do other things that at first you thought you would never do but all of a sudden its no big deal or you can justify it I think that is why God judges the marriage bed. Many of the porn especially amatures porn is made by husband and wife. I knew years ago couples broke  up and the wife said she would get the tape but it was "lost" next thing you know its on the internet. or everyone at the spot has a copy or saw it and you didn't know about it.  I work in the Legal Department we have a saying,  Don't say/do anything you don't mind having posted in the paper or on the 5pm News.  Me personally I don't want God to record it.  my husband did the same thing, He even got mad because i refuse but I didn't refuse because of God but because I didn't think I would look cute. and I hated the ideal of him looking at it while i was mad at him. I didn't want to see him either so you know I thought it was all foolishness.  I am so grateful I never did it since we are no longer together.  Plus I don't think I would have ever been able to get over the shame. (now that I am saved the shame would have really bothered me)


----------



## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

blazingthru said:


> i think it would be both, Taping it and watching it. What would be the purpose and if you do this you will do other things that at first you thought you would never do but all of a sudden its no big deal or you can justify it I think that is why God judges the marriage bed. Many of the porn especially amatures porn is made by husband and wife. I knew years ago couples broke up and the wife said she would get the tape but it was "lost" next thing you know its on the internet. or everyone at the spot has a copy or saw it and you didn't know about it. I work in the Legal Department we have a saying, Don't say/do anything you don't mind having posted in the paper or on the 5pm News. Me personally I don't want God to record it. my husband did the same thing, He even got mad because i refuse but I didn't refuse because of God but because I didn't think I would look cute. and I hated the ideal of him looking at it while i was mad at him. I didn't want to see him either so you know I thought it was all foolishness. I am so grateful I never did it since we are no longer together. Plus I don't think I would have ever been able to get over the shame. (now that I am saved the shame would have really bothered me)


 
thanks Blazin, I feel u, but I think the difference is that it will not be for sale, and it will be FOR OUR EYES ONLY.. I think the question came us because like a few of the ladies said, men are visual... they are just different like that.  I can't give a real explaination of why he may want to do that, but I did hear him out and thats why I am here.. lol  I have not even thought about what happens if we get divorced and he brings it to the barber shop etc.. cause I DO NOT claim that. We have a very healthy and loving relationship with God 1st. That is what brings me to you all to ask the questions.  I have come to the realization that it seems like their is no wrong or right, just that its a personal THANG.. *shruggin shoulders*.. lol


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

Blazin, whats your view on Shimmie and Kooskoos questions also?


----------



## Nice & Wavy (Aug 4, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> thanks Blazin, I feel u, but I think the difference is that it will not be for sale, and it will be FOR OUR EYES ONLY.. I think the question came us because like a few of the ladies said, men are visual... they are just different like that.  I can't give a real explaination of why he may want to do that, but I did hear him out and thats why I am here.. lol  I have not even thought about what happens if we get divorced and he brings it to the barber shop etc.. cause I DO NOT claim that. We have a very healthy and loving relationship with God 1st. That is what brings me to you all to ask the questions.  I have come to the realization that it seems like their is no wrong or right, just that its a personal THANG.. *shruggin shoulders*.. lol



Sis, don't shrug your shoulders....you know the Lord and you hear from him, both you and your husband.  Pray about it together if you haven't already, and let the Lord lead you both.  You will know.....


----------



## divya (Aug 4, 2009)

kooskoos said:


> I guess it depends on the couple, and what God tells that couple. I don't believe in anal sex based on the way I've been socialized and my own culture, but what about oral sex? I know of some married couples who find great intimacy in performing that act for each other. Or what about masturbation while your husband is away, or letting him watch you do that? Is that wrong as well?
> 
> I dunno...*all I can say is go with God.* I won't judge what you do in the bedroom, 'cause it's your business at the end of the day. I just guess I won't be telling you ladies what I'm up to once I get married  ...cause I'm going all out



Isn't anal sex sodomy though? But then I read that oral sex has been included in sodomy.  Need to do more prayer and research. My pastor is a marriage counselor so maybe that will be a good question. 

Agree with the bold.


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 4, 2009)

divya said:


> Isn't anal sex sodomy though? But then I read that oral sex has been included in sodomy.  Need to do more prayer and research. My pastor is a marriage counselor so maybe that will be a good question.
> 
> Agree with the bold.


 

Boy O' boy.. the plot thickens.. lol thats good questions to divya!! I'd love to know answers/opinions on that too!


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## Shimmie (Aug 5, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> Boy O' boy.. the plot thickens.. lol thats good questions to divya!! I'd love to know answers/opinions on that too!


 
 












Just kidding.   

I saw your questions addressed to me and I'll be back a little later to share what's on my heart.   I've been praying and asking God about somethings regarding this, but I need to allow more time to listen to what He's sharing with me.       

Hope you're having a blessed day.  :Rose:


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## Laela (Aug 5, 2009)

This is true...it would cover both the good and the bad... 

you're welcome.. 



divya said:


> It is easy to get the idea that porn is just what we understand to be the current porn industry, which is watching other people have sexual intercourse (encouraging lust of others). BUT the word *pornography is all encompassing.For that reason, I personally would avoid it and recommend avoiding it*. Better to err on the side of caution...
> 
> Thank you Laela.


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 5, 2009)

Laela said:


> This is true...it would cover both the good and the bad...
> 
> you're welcome..


 
I feel ya.. thanks honee!


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## Laela (Aug 5, 2009)

Good thoughts indeed... Shimmie. 

But to the bolded, I would think no, even to a recorded DVD, but my problem with that is it leaves room for error. If it's left somewhere and someone happens to see it, the viewers would in fact be looking at porn... I agree w/ the person who suggest the couple watch the DVD and destroy it, if that's just to satisfy their curiousity. Of course, nothing is wrong with a husband lusting after his own wife, in any form...

Marriage IS beautiful.... but God also advises us to be wise in our deeds. 




Shimmie said:


> It's a very fine line ... indeed.
> 
> *Questions:*  These are just 'thoughts' as a result of this topic.
> 
> ...


----------



## Laela (Aug 5, 2009)

God bless you, Mrs! You really brought up a interesting topic.. 




Mrs.TheBronx said:


> I feel ya.. thanks honee!


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## Shimmie (Aug 5, 2009)

Laela said:


> Good thoughts indeed... Shimmie.
> 
> But to the bolded, I would think no, even to a recorded DVD, but my problem with that is it leaves room for error. If it's left somewhere and someone happens to see it, the viewers would in fact be looking at porn... I agree w/ the person who suggest the couple watch the DVD and destroy it, if that's just to satisfy their curiousity. Of course, nothing is wrong with a husband lusting after his own wife, in any form...
> 
> Marriage IS beautiful.... *but God also advises us to be wise in our deeds*.


 
   To all of your posts and your advise.     Laela and Mrs Bronx, I'll tell you both, I was thrown for a loop.   I just couldn't give a sure answer. 

This morning I was sitting on the commuter bus, I was still thinking and talking to the Lord about this and this came into my spirit very firm and yet very gentle.    _"They are husband and wife."_    and that's where I had peace about it.   

As I was sitting there looking out of the window, I could sense the 'closure' of the room and what goes on behind those closed doors is between husband and wife.  Their bodies belong to each other and no one else, except God.   What they 'both' choose to do 'in private' is between them.  

The 'key' words _'in private'_ are paramount because whatever they record must be maintained _'in private.'_ 

May I come back a little later to share a little more.   Some of it is funny, because while I was talking to the Lord this morning, I made a list of why I couldn't do it.   I think you'll enjoy it.   

And I have a list for you too, Mrs. Bronx...  

I love talking to God but I think He gives me a 'side-eye' with some of my queries.       I'll be back in a little while.  I need to finish a project on my desk for my boss.   I have a break coming up soon. 

Blessings...  :Rose:


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## Shimmie (Aug 5, 2009)

Laela said:


> God bless you, Mrs! You really brought up a interesting topic..


That's the *TRUTH!*   The whole Truth and Nothing But...


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 5, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> To all of your posts and your advise. Laela and Mrs Bronx, I'll tell you both, I was thrown for a loop. I just couldn't give a sure answer.
> 
> This morning I was sitting on the commuter bus, I was still thinking and talking to the Lord about this and this came into my spirit very firm and yet very gentle. _"They are husband and wife."_ and that's where I had peace about it.
> 
> ...


......


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## Laela (Aug 5, 2009)

Well, lemme go grab my bag of popcorn and box of Goobers, Shimmie...

_be right baaaack! **Laela running to Walgreens_


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## blazingthru (Aug 5, 2009)

I guess my question is this: Is it the recording of a husband watching his wife naked a sin? A picture? If he watches her 'live' while she's naked, is that sin too? 

My opinion is yes it is.  Everything has it place and time.  I don't think we should immortalized our bodies.  I mean how many statues was left of kings and queens and others, naked exposed to the world.  Our memorizes last for a lifetime and that should be enough. 
The other question anal sex and oral sex.  I know that anal sex is forbidden. For the life of me I cannot imagine why any one would want to do it.  I know its pleasurable for a man ( why we have so many gay men,  its extremely pleasurable to them) but to a female it is not, at least from what I heard. But then what do I know, I know a couple of oops hurt for two weeks.  I know that part of our body was not meant for sexual pleasure its for the release of the bowels and to put a body part in that filth is only asking for trouble. I didn't think oral sex would be sinful as far as I am concerned its a natural part of making love. You know this is my thoughts, God will judge the marriage bed and to me that means everything in it.  Do you love this person (your husband) or you thinking of him. or someone or something else.  Why would God judge the marriage bed. I think thats really where we need to be focusing on, more then anything else. The only time Judging comes up is when something isn't right. The love that you and your husband has for each other is special and again a gift and I think you should cherish what you have and not add to it.  I think the video will do more harm then good. even if no one ever sees it.


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 5, 2009)

Laela said:


> God bless you, Mrs! You really brought up a interesting topic..


 

Awww thanks Laela, I do think it is a great topic to discuss so we can all learn from each other and gain clarity!!   Thank u ladies!


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 5, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> To all of your posts and your advise. Laela and Mrs Bronx, I'll tell you both, I was thrown for a loop. I just couldn't give a sure answer.
> 
> This morning I was sitting on the commuter bus, I was still thinking and talking to the Lord about this and this came into my spirit very firm and yet very gentle. _"They are husband and wife."_ and that's where I had peace about it.
> 
> ...


 

LOL!! Due share Smimmie!!


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 5, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> That's the *TRUTH!* The whole Truth and Nothing But...


 
Aww thanks! And it just brought up so many other topics like the oral sex and other things that were mentioned. I think its a very healthy conversation. Thanks!


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 5, 2009)

Laela said:


> Well, lemme go grab my bag of popcorn and box of Goobers, Shimmie...
> 
> _be right baaaack! **Laela running to Walgreens_


 
Ya'll are tooooooooooooo funny!!


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 5, 2009)

blazingthru said:


> I guess my question is this: Is it the recording of a husband watching his wife naked a sin? A picture? If he watches her 'live' while she's naked, is that sin too?
> 
> My opinion is yes it is. Everything has it place and time. I don't think we should immortalized our bodies. I mean how many statues was left of kings and queens and others, naked exposed to the world. Our memorizes last for a lifetime and that should be enough.
> The other question anal sex and oral sex. I know that anal sex is forbidden. For the life of me I cannot imagine why any one would want to do it. I know its pleasurable for a man ( why we have so many gay men, its extremely pleasurable to them) but to a female it is not, at least from what I heard. But then what do I know, I know a couple of oops hurt for two weeks. I know that part of our body was not meant for sexual pleasure its for the release of the bowels and to put a body part in that filth is only asking for trouble. I didn't think oral sex would be sinful as far as I am concerned its a natural part of making love. You know this is my thoughts, God will judge the marriage bed and to me that means everything in it. Do you love this person (your husband) or you thinking of him. or someone or something else. Why would God judge the marriage bed. I think thats really where we need to be focusing on, more then anything else. The only time Judging comes up is when something isn't right. The love that you and your husband has for each other is special and again a gift and I think you should cherish what you have and not add to it. I think the video will do more harm then good. even if no one ever sees it.


 

Thanks Blazin!!  
Okay guys in your opinion, if a man or woman that is shipped off to the middle east to war, would u consider it wrong from him/her to look at naked pictures of his wife/husband? masturbation, thats another thing if he/she is away.. what about that one?
Also, do u think that it is wrong for a husband to watch his wife naked "live" (not taped)? I know Blazin thinks that is sinful, what about u all?What about the whole aspect of "Toys" and costumes and role playing etc.? Where does that all stand it you all's view?  Now all of these questions are for a husband a wife scenerio's.


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## Irresistible (Aug 5, 2009)

I personally wouldnt make the tape,  but I personally dont see any thing wrong with a married couple deciding thats what they want to do with each other either


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 5, 2009)

Laela said:


> Well, lemme go grab my bag of popcorn and box of Goobers, Shimmie...
> 
> _be right baaaack! **Laela running to Walgreens_






Mrs.TheBronx said:


> Thanks Blazin!!
> Okay guys in your opinion, if a man or woman that is shipped off to the middle east to war, would u consider it wrong from him/her to look at naked pictures of his wife/husband? masturbation, thats another thing if he/she is away.. what about that one?
> *
> 
> ...


If that is sinful, then I'm have/going to be sinning alot thenerplexed

Proverbs 5: 19 KJV says this: _Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her *breasts* satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always *with her love*.  _

Now, if I had my clothes on, how would my breasts satisfy him and how will he be 'ravished' with my love?


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 5, 2009)

Irresistible said:


> I personally wouldnt make the tape, but I personally dont see any thing wrong with a married couple deciding thats what they want to do with each other either


 
Thanks, I personally don't have any desire to make a video as this was hubby idea.They are sooo visual! But wanted to see what you all thought. I am really getting some insight on these topics


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 5, 2009)

Nice & Wavy said:


> If that is sinful, then I'm have/going to be sinning alot thenerplexed
> 
> Proverbs 5: 19 KJV says this: _Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her *breasts* satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always *with her love*. _
> 
> Now, if I had my clothes on, how would my breasts satisfy him and how will he be 'ravished' with my love?


 
Hehehe, i feel u nice and wavy, but at the same time being respectful of blazins views and how she see it. My opinion is that your hubby should be able to stare, touch, feel his wifes entire body. but thats me.. hehe


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 5, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> Hehehe, i feel u nice and wavy, but at the same time being respectful of blazins views and how she see it. My opinion is that your hubby should be able to stare, touch, feel his wifes entire body. but thats me.. hehe


Oh, I didn't know I was being disrespectful to blazin by giving my opinion on your question.  Sorry, didn't mean to do that, I was just answering your question.


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## Shimmie (Aug 5, 2009)

Nice & Wavy said:


> ......


 


Laela said:


> Well, lemme go grab my bag of popcorn and box of Goobers, Shimmie...
> 
> _be right baaaack! **Laela running to Walgreens_


 


Mrs.TheBronx said:


> LOL!! Due share Smimmie!!


 

Why Shimmie couldn't  tape...

*5.  My children have 'radar'.*   I can't hide Nuthin' from them.  Nuthin'!  They find things that I forgot I had hidden.  

My daugther always finds my 'good' earrings that I thought were hidden.   My new socks or my new sandals.    

My son always finds stuff around the house and says, "What's this?"  

You'd think they could handle me in a tape?  No Suh-ree!    It wouldn't matter  at all to them if I were married.      

My daughter saw me looking  (_not buying_, but looking) at a thong in a store one day and  she almost lost her 'color' . I thought she had asthma.   I told her_, I'm just looking at it._   She couldn't handle it.    They'd have me committed if they saw me in a tape.    This is what I get for being so strict with them. 

*4.  I'm just too vain.*  I'd be too worried about my hair shrinking back.

*3.  Again, I'm too vain:*  I'd be thinking about the camera 'angles'  (no bottoms up)  

*2 . I'd be afraid that it would end up on You Tube*. 

*1.  Here's my biggest Fear.....*



Coming into the forum and seeing a thread entitled: 


*"DANNNNNNNNGGGGG Shimmie ! ! !"*


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## BeautifulFlower (Aug 5, 2009)

*DISCLAIMER: This is not directed at anyone just something I thought of. I hope this question doesn't come out wrong. *

The bible says that when I am married my body becomes my husbands. So...why are Christian women so bent on be super conservative with their husbands in the bedroom? I figured that if you are a conservative person, the one place you can let your hair down and be 100% free in with your husband in the privacy of your bedroom.

Its like you...you waited all those years to be free with one man forever...and now.....IDK...maybe I'd have to be married to understand.


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 5, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> Why Shimmie couldn't tape...
> 
> *5. My children have 'radar'.* I can't hide Nuthin' from them. Nuthin'! They find things that I forgot I had hidden.
> 
> ...


 that last one is hysterical.


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## Shimmie (Aug 5, 2009)

Nice & Wavy said:


> that last one is hysterical.


 
    I could never post again.  Never!


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## kooskoos (Aug 5, 2009)

Hmmm....so I've read through some of the new posts and such, and I've been thinking...

...it all comes down to prayer. If you feel some type of way about a certain sexual act, then you should definitely seek God's guidance on the situation, both you and your husband. I could see how anal sex could be described as "sodomy," and sodomy is definitely a no no. But I don't think oral sex is sodomy even though homosexual people practice this type of sex. Homosexuals also kiss each other, so we can't rule everything out just because they do it too.

I find it hard to believe that God is going to give me a "wag of the finger" for letting my  husband relish in my nakedness (cause I will be putting on shows in my birthday suit). Marriage is the venue for sexual pleasure! I mean c'mon...God will give me a husband to enjoy sexually, just as much as spiritually, emotionally, and intellectually. I know that everytime I look at my husband's body, I will be praising God on the inside for making something so wonderful  

Marriage is to be the release for our passion--why do you think the Apostle Paul said it's better to get married than to burn (both with unfulfilled passion and later in hell)? Because he knew that we are created with an innate sexual desire, and without an appropriate sexual outlet, we're setting ourselves up for the oki doke because we're going to live with lust.

Based on what the Lord has revealed to me, we should be more worried about lust before marriage and lusting other people when we're married, than we should be about sex within the context of marriage. God wants you to love your sex life. When he says he wants us to prosper in all things as our souls prosper, he really does mean ALL THINGS! As long as you're not putting your sex life BEFORE THE LORD, or find yourself spending more time watching the sex tape than reading the Word...hey, you should be great


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## Shimmie (Aug 5, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> Thanks, I personally don't have any desire to make a video as this was hubby idea.They are sooo visual! But wanted to see what you all thought. I am really getting some insight on these topics


I just think it's a compliment to you 'from him' that he wants you as his 'Star' performer.   And I mean this very respectfully.  I truly do.   

So this next post is dedicated to you, Mrs.TheBronx.   In the 'event' that you do decide to do so.  

*Dear Mr. and Mrs. TheBronx:  *

1.  Do NOT have silk sheets on the bed.   You both will slide right out the camera's view.  

(Those sheets are dangerous.   I'm always sliding off the bed with those things.  ).

2.  Do NOT eat any type of lentils, beans or peanuts; drink milk or eat ice cream (nothing that stirs up lactose intolerance)  before the tape sessions.    The unexpected facial expressions will not be flattering. 

3.  Tell Hubbie, please don't beat on his chest like King Kong.  You know he's 'The King of Jungle'.  No 'cheesy' grins in the camera.  

4.  Do Not attempt to try or perform ANYTHING new.   This is not the time to practice new skills or to try positions that you read about in Cosmo magazine.    You might break something.    The paramedics are not on the guest list here. 

5.  Have background music.   Not the sound track to "Cotton Comes to Harlem' (you're in the Bronx).   Please don't play 'Country', it will set your 'rhythm out of sync. 

6.  Do not wrap that hair... Please do not wrap that hair.  Do not have a scarf on that hair.     Be free       

Finally and I can't stress this enough..

 *No Updates to this thread...   *  :blush3:     

I wish above all things that you have all the joys that marriage can bring.  Give hubby a great big hug and thank God that it's 'YOU' who pleasures his eyes; 'you' and no one else.   That's the way it should be camera or not.  

 

I have no doubt that the wisdom abounds greatly from the wives and wives to be our Christian Forum Community.  They love you and want only God's best for you.  So do I.    :Rose:


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## kooskoos (Aug 5, 2009)

Lol, awww this was cute. 



Shimmie said:


> I just think it's a compliment to you 'from him' that he wants you as his 'Star' performer. And I mean this very respectfully. I truly do.
> 
> So this next post is dedicated to you, Mrs.TheBronx. In the 'event' that you do decide to do so.
> 
> ...


----------



## Irresistible (Aug 5, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> Thanks, I personally don't have any desire to make a video as this was hubby idea.They are sooo visual! But wanted to see what you all thought. I am really getting some insight on these topics



ahhh girl with you not 'feelin' it,  it might take a few takes hehe

or take some time to yourself to start to get used to the idea so your comfortable if you really want to do this for him (you guys)

I just been here laughin at shimmie

I did a 'kissing' vid once with my ex,  very sensual,  but thats bout as far as I could go.........I think.......


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 5, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> I just think it's a compliment to you 'from him' that he wants you as his 'Star' performer. And I mean this very respectfully. I truly do.
> 
> So this next post is dedicated to you, Mrs.TheBronx. In the 'event' that you do decide to do so.
> 
> ...


:rofl3:


----------



## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 5, 2009)

Nice & Wavy said:


> Oh, I didn't know I was being disrespectful to blazin by giving my opinion on your question. Sorry, didn't mean to do that, I was just answering your question.


 

Typing can be soooo misunderstood.. no honee, i never said u were.. I said I am trying to be respectful (understanding) of all views.. thats what i meant.. I would never judge u like that honee!!

SMOOOOOOCHES!


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 5, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> Typing can be soooo misunderstood.. no honee, i never said u were.. I said I am trying to be respectful (understanding) of all views.. thats what i meant.. I would never judge u like that honee!!
> 
> SMOOOOOOCHES!


I agree...typing can be misunderstood.  

Thank you.


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 5, 2009)

Nice & Wavy said:


> that last one is hysterical.


 
 TOOOOOOOOOOOO funny Nice and Wavy!!


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 5, 2009)

kooskoos said:


> Hmmm....so I've read through some of the new posts and such, and I've been thinking...
> 
> ...it all comes down to prayer. If you feel some type of way about a certain sexual act, then you should definitely seek God's guidance on the situation, both you and your husband. I could see how anal sex could be described as "sodomy," and sodomy is definitely a no no. But I don't think oral sex is sodomy even though homosexual people practice this type of sex. Homosexuals also kiss each other, so we can't rule everything out just because they do it too.
> 
> ...


 

You have hit the nail on the head!!! Its like we are not to glorify or worship anything but God.. so those taps If they are to be made, should not like everything else, come before our Lord and Savior! I like that Kooskoos!!


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 5, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> I just think it's a compliment to you 'from him' that he wants you as his 'Star' performer. And I mean this very respectfully. I truly do.
> 
> So this next post is dedicated to you, Mrs.TheBronx. In the 'event' that you do decide to do so.
> 
> ...


 

Shimmy that was sooooooo awesome! LMBO!! hehehehehe I got such a kick out of that my co-worker came and asked me what i was laughin so hard at!!! U gon get me in trouble! LMBO!!! Thanks honee!!


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 5, 2009)

Irresistible said:


> ahhh girl with you not 'feelin' it, it might take a few takes hehe
> 
> or take some time to yourself to start to get used to the idea so your comfortable if you really want to do this for him (you guys)
> 
> ...


 
LMBO!!! i love the "i think..." at the end!!!!!!! LOL!!!


----------



## Evolving78 (Aug 5, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> It's a very fine line ... indeed.
> 
> *Questions:*  These are just 'thoughts' as a result of this topic.
> 
> ...



i agree Shimmer with your post.  this is a good break down of the definition of porn and according to the definition of porn or pornography, what OP and her husband want to do doesn't fit the bill, meaning it wouldn't be technically classified as such.

*pornography: creative activity (writing or pictures or films etc.) of no literary or artistic value other than to stimulate sexual desire 

As for the word "porn", it is a diminuitive of pornography, which is derived from the Greek pornografias ("place for writing about prostitutes".)*

because there is no prostitution taking place in the marriage bed, i don't see what the problem is.  now you may want to look at some underlining issues of why your spouse wants to create a video and watch it.  does  he have a past of watching/engaging in pornographic material?  this could be a urge to satisfy something that is being suppressed.
and if it is, then you don't want to open Pandora's box.  people(especially men) have a way of manipulating a situation to there advantage, gaining your trusting and misguiding you to allow your guard down.  pray and be on your guard my sister in Christ.


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 5, 2009)

shortdub78 said:


> i agree Shimmer with your post. this is a good break down of the definition of porn and according to the definition of porn or pornography, what OP and her husband want to do doesn't fit the bill, meaning it wouldn't be technically classified as such.
> 
> *pornography: creative activity (writing or pictures or films etc.) of no literary or artistic value other than to stimulate sexual desire *
> 
> ...


 

Thanks Short, that is something to lookin to..  could be an innocent fantasty tho too, but we shall c!


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## blazingthru (Aug 5, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> Hehehe, i feel u nice and wavy, but at the same time being respectful of blazins views and how she see it. My opinion is that your hubby *should be able to stare, touch, feel his wifes entire body. but thats me..* hehe


 
My apologies if I was not clear that is not what I meant.  I agree to this as well.  I think you should be free with one another I don't think married couples should be shy with one another. I dont think we should take pictures of each other nude though.  I don't think God will bless that.


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 5, 2009)

blazingthru said:


> My apologies if I was not clear that is not what I meant. I agree to this as well. I think you should be free with one another I don't think married couples should be shy with one another. I dont think we should take pictures of each other nude though. I don't think God will bless that.


 
Thanks Blazin, I appreciate your opinion, not that i totally agree, but i do hear ya!


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## Shimmie (Aug 5, 2009)

Nice & Wavy said:


> :rofl3:


 
You know you're gonna have to 'pray' for me.   

I had absolutely NO Idea that this was in me.      I can't believe what I wrote in this thread.  :blush3:

And I'm not done....  
This is what happens when I get bored at my desk at work.  

I'm going to address the more serious questions, seriously.  There some things on my heart.   Praise God.


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 6, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> You know you're gonna have to 'pray' for me.
> 
> I had absolutely NO Idea that this was in me.    I can't believe what I wrote in this thread. :blush3:
> 
> ...


 

Yes please!!! Address away!!!!!!!


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 6, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> You know you're gonna have to 'pray' for me.
> 
> I had absolutely NO Idea that this was in me.    I can't believe what I wrote in this thread. :blush3:
> 
> ...


...sorry, sis...I'm laughing alot already this morning


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## Laela (Aug 6, 2009)

Riiiight... I mean, _how _else.. ? 



How did this turn into into a man and his wife shouldn't have sex nekkid? 

Sorry, Blazin' ...this is funny stuff...



Nice & Wavy said:


> If that is sinful, then I'm have/going to be sinning alot thenerplexed
> 
> Proverbs 5: 19 KJV says this: _Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her *breasts* satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always *with her love*.  _
> 
> *Now, if I had my clothes on, how would my breasts satisfy him and how will he be 'ravished' with my love*?


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## Laela (Aug 6, 2009)

I bought my Goobers. 




Mrs.TheBronx said:


> Yes please!!! Address away!!!!!!!


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 6, 2009)

Laela said:


> I bought my Goobers.


 

LOL!!!!!!!!!!!! I got my bag of twizzlers and my take the cake ice cream! Im good to go!


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 6, 2009)

Where's Shimmie?  I'm about to eat all my food waiting.....


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 6, 2009)

Nice & Wavy said:


> Where's Shimmie? I'm about to eat all my food waiting.....


 

Oh my!!! is that waht u really eating?!?!?! LOL thats looks yummy


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## Laela (Aug 6, 2009)

Naaaachoooooos!!!! ***may I have some? 


Where IS Shimmie...? She's getting a hungry crowd.  I can't eat my Goobers until I get the good word. LOL


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## Shimmie (Aug 6, 2009)

blazingthru said:


> My apologies if I was not clear that is not what I meant. I agree to this as well. I think you should be free with one another I don't think married couples should be shy with one another.
> 
> I* dont think we should take pictures of each other nude though.*
> *I don't think God will bless that*.


 
Back then when God created Adam and Eve............











Adam was outta' film.....  

Can't tell a man not to take pictures of his wife 'nekkid'.   He'll do this when she's sleeping    

It's his nature to 'keep the view' alive.  All they wanna do is 'see'.   That's all I ever heard  from my ex-husband was "Let me see."    Men cannot exist without 'seeing' what they are naturally drawn to.   

I can just see them at St. Peter's gate with a handful of pictures, saying "See"!    

Just try and tell a man that he *cannot* have a nekkid' picture of his wife.   They'll never 'hear' you.  But they'll be steady 'clicking'


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## Shimmie (Aug 6, 2009)

Nice & Wavy said:


> Where's Shimmie? I'm about to eat all my food waiting.....


 


Mrs.TheBronx said:


> LOL!!!!!!!!!!!! I got my bag of twizzlers and my take the cake ice cream! Im good to go!


 


Laela said:


> I bought my Goobers.


 


Mrs.TheBronx said:


> Oh my!!! is that waht u really eating?!?!?! LOL thats looks yummy


 


Laela said:


> Naaaachoooooos!!!! ***may I have some?
> 
> 
> Where IS Shimmie...? She's getting a hungry crowd. I can't eat my Goobers until I get the good word. LOL


 
    You precious ladies are tooooooo funny.    


And I'm so hungry.    We had guests in the office all morning and I had to kick  them out.   

I never had a chance to answer the rest of Mrs. TheBronx' questions about the really serious stuff.    I think we're all on the same page, here.  

Pass me dem' nacho's;  hand me a goober and a twizzler.    I'm ready to eat lunch.   


ETA:  I take my break at 2:00.  By then I should be able to address the more serious questions.  anal, oral, whatcha ma call its.


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 6, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> Oh my!!! is that waht u really eating?!?!?! LOL thats looks yummy


No, I'm having a salad, but that's what I would have LIKED to eat, let me tell you...



Laela said:


> Naaaachoooooos!!!! ***may I have some?
> 
> 
> Where IS Shimmie...? She's getting a hungry crowd. I can't eat my Goobers until I get the good word. LOL


I love Nacho's.....yummmy



Shimmie said:


> Back then when God created Adam and Eve............
> 
> 
> 
> ...






Shimmie said:


> You precious ladies are tooooooo funny.
> 
> 
> And I'm so hungry. We had guests in the office all morning and I had to kick  them out.
> ...


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 6, 2009)

Ohhhhhhh this is awesome!! I am waiting!!!!!!!!!


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## Shimmie (Aug 6, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> Ohhhhhhh this is awesome!! I am waiting!!!!!!!!!


 
Hi Married Lady   

I just want to share how much your thread has blessed me.  Even though I cut up like a fool with this topic, it really opened my heart all the more to be in loving prayer for our marriages.   

With your permission, I have a Marriage Prayer that has been stirring in my heart that I would like to post here.   

*Ladies can I share with you what I've been sensing in my heart?* 

There are many Christian women who are really going 'through' in their marriages in the area of 'The Marriage Bed'.   With all of their hearts they want to please God and yet please their husbands.    And they are actually scared....very scared.  

*Please note:   I'm not speaking of anyone that I know personally.   Yet I think that each of you will agree that you also sense these issues too.  *

*Look at these below and see if we agree.    Again, it's no one that I know and no one has shared this with me personally.  *

:Rose:  In my heart I see a wife who cries herself to sleep at night because she doesn't feel that she is 'romantically' adequate for her husband because she lacks experience.   

:Rose:  I thought of another wife who has done what she's not comfortable with, yet she fears her husband won't want her if she refuses.  

:Rose: I also 'see' a wife who's not satisfied with her husband's love making and she's fearful that he will think 'ill' of her if she expresses to him, what she would enjoy.  

These 'tears' and heartaches are real.  There are many Christian women who feel so lost and so afraid.   They've done the right thing by "_waiting until marriage to have sex."_   But now it's become a nightmare for them. 

Everyone:  Please share your feelings.   Our 'prayers' may be a 'breakthrough" for someone.   I open my heart to your prayers, it will help my prayers to flow.  

Thanks so much to each of you...


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## Supergirl (Aug 6, 2009)

Shimmie said "put on a show" 

OP, my thoughts were that if it is between the two of you only and both parties are comfortable with it then I don't see a problem. I don't think it's something that _I_ would want to do, but that doesn't make it wrong.

Now, God bless your marriage and I pray that you guys will be together forever but you know that the unexpected can happen and I wouldn't want that video to end up being used as a weapon against you. (or you using it against him )


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## Shimmie (Aug 6, 2009)

Nice & Wavy said:


> No, I'm having a salad, but that's what I would have LIKED to eat, let me tell you...
> 
> I love Nacho's.....yummmy


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 6, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> Hi Married Lady
> 
> I just want to share how much your thread has blessed me. Even though I cut up like a fool with this topic, it really opened my heart all the more to be in loving prayer for our marriages.
> 
> ...


 

WOW Shimmie.. this is really and important topic about wives in so way feeling not good enough, scared to tell hubby they are not satisfied, and lacking commuication in hope to solely please him while forgetting about yourself. I think every woman married or not can relate to these things above. It happens so often, and prolly so much so that it just feels normal, and you tell yourself mentally to just go with the flow. BUT I do beleive that in order to have healthy relationships, communication is KEY! Did u all notice that around all of those 3 issues, communication is absent? I don't know alot of mind readers, so most time our spouse doesn't know just how we feel.. There are mulitpule ways to express our feelings, a letter, a card, an email, or just coming out and voiceing our concerns with love. Now I dont know you all personally but what I have found is that we dont talk enough about REAL issues with out mates. I beleive if we start doing that more and really being more expressive, things will be so much better.  Thanks Shimmie, because I really stuggle with communicating in this way... I'm not a real mushy kinda girl, im not always huggin and kissin and being very expressive, I AM WORKING ON IT THO! HEHEHE


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 6, 2009)

You know, I just went to check my email and I saw that I got one from hubby.  I opened it and it was a youtube video....

I'm not even going to tell you what it is, I want you to see and hear it for yourselves.  For some, it may be corny, but for me...it was the best email I ever received!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MbQjDxA7g-M

What a thoughtful and loving man, that he would remind me of how much he loves me in such a simple and basic way.

I cannot do without him...Thank you, Father for my husband!


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 6, 2009)

Nice & Wavy said:


> You know, I just went to check my email and I saw that I got one from hubby. I opened it and it was a youtube video....
> 
> I'm not even going to tell you what it is, I want you to see and hear it for yourselves. For some, it may be corny, but for me...it was the best email I ever received!!!
> 
> ...


 


Awww he must be romantic!  Im sooo not romantic! hehehehe, but my hubby loves me for what I am!  Thats the sweetest gift!


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## Shimmie (Aug 6, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> WOW Shimmie.. this is really and important topic about wives in so way feeling not good enough, scared to tell hubby they are not satisfied, and lacking commuication in hope to solely please him while forgetting about yourself.
> 
> I think every woman married or not can relate to these things above.
> It happens so often, and prolly so much so that it just feels normal, and you tell yourself mentally to just go with the flow. BUT I do beleive that in order to have healthy relationships, communication is KEY!
> ...


I 'missed' it, Mrs.TheBronx.   

*Communication IS the key missing element here.* 

Sometimes I think that we've been so good at being 'chaste' before marriage, that we 'forget' that after marriage the veils can be removed.  It's okay to remove the 'guarded' verbage of sexual intimacy and be free to communicate with 'our' husbands about sex.


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 6, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> I 'missed' it, Mrs.TheBronx.
> 
> *Communication IS the key missing element here.*
> 
> Sometimes I think that we've been so good at being 'chaste' before marriage, that we 'forget' that after marriage the veils can be removed. It's okay to remove the 'guarded' verbage of sexual intimacy and be free to communicate with 'our' husbands about sex.


 
girl u hit the nail on the head!! that is sooo true!!!!


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## Shimmie (Aug 6, 2009)

Nice & Wavy said:


> You know, I just went to check my email and I saw that I got one from hubby. I opened it and it was a youtube video....
> 
> I'm not even going to tell you what it is, I want you to see and hear it for yourselves. For some, it may be corny, but for me...it was the best email I ever received!!!
> 
> ...


   Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww  

Tenderly, your hubby loves you so....      

The evening breeze caress the trees,
Tenderly. 
The trembling trees embrace the breeze, 
Tenderly. 

Then you and I came wandering by, 
And lost in a sigh were we. 
The shore was kissed by sea and mist, 
Tenderly. 

I can't forget how two hearts met, 
Breathlessly.
Your arms opened wide and closed me inside. 
You took my lips, you took my love 
So tenderly. 

~ 

Your arms opened wide and closed me inside. 
You took my lips, you took my love 
So tenderly. 

You took my lips, you took my love 
So tenderly.​~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 

Beautiful........


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 6, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> Awww he must be romantic!  Im sooo not romantic! hehehehe, but my hubby loves me for what I am!  Thats the sweetest gift!


Thanks, sis.  Actually, he isn't very romantic...I'm the romantic one, usually.  But, when he does get there, its so sweet and so loving, just like this video.  A bit corny, but the best in the whole, wide world!


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 6, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
> 
> Tenderly, your hubby loves you so....
> 
> ...


See, now you got me  

Yes, he does love me...I'm so blessed to have him in my life...blessed I say!!!

Aren't those words, beautiful?  Oh, gosh....I love it!


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## Shimmie (Aug 6, 2009)

Mrs.TheBronx said:


> girl u hit the nail on the head!! that is sooo true!!!!


I don't know what it is with me today, but Marriage Prayers are heavy upon my heart.   

It's been so busy today, that I haven't been able to flow so that God can 'release' them.   I thought about a separate thread, but I'd like to place a prayer here as well.    I just wanted your 'okay'.   

I'm not trying to 'hijack' the topic.  

Mrs. Bronx, there's someone 'here', viewing this thread; they haven't posted and may not ever.  But they are 'here'.   God has a 'word' for them, through each of us.    

I'll be back later tonight.    I love you Ladies.     We've had a lot of fun here.    

Mrs. TheBronx started it.....  .  

:blowkiss:     Back to work  -- then 5:08 train.


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 6, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> I don't know what it is with me today, but Marriage Prayers are heavy upon my heart.
> 
> It's been so busy today, that I haven't been able to flow so that God can 'release' them. I thought about a separate thread, but I'd like to place a prayer here as well. I just wanted your 'okay'.
> 
> ...


 
Yes I feel exactly the same way!!! Someone is getting some help, including myself!!!!!!!!! I thank you!!! Imma go home a be mushy today.. JUST BECAUSE!


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 6, 2009)

Nice & Wavy said:


> Thanks, sis. Actually, he isn't very romantic...I'm the romantic one, usually. But, when he does get there, its so sweet and so loving, just like this video. A bit corny, but the best in the whole, wide world!


 

It sure is.. it makes it kinda special when u not always mushy to have spontaneous mushiness! LOL  u know what i mean although it did't come out too neat.. LOL


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## Shimmie (Aug 6, 2009)

Nice & Wavy said:


> See, now you got me
> 
> Yes, he does love me...I'm so blessed to have him in my life...blessed I say!!!
> 
> Aren't those words, beautiful? Oh, gosh....I love it!


 
   We dun' gone from laughing to crying in dis'here thread   

*Nat King Cole's Version:*

*"Tenderly"*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CvSbCmXKvBc&feature=fvw

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CvSbCmXKvBc&feature=fvw


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 6, 2009)

Shimmie said:


> We dun' gone from laughing to crying in dis'here thread
> 
> *Nat King Cole's Version:*
> 
> ...


Yup....  

I love his version too.....


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## yodie (Aug 6, 2009)

Great thread ladies.  I just read everything.  

I'm not married YET, so I'm taking notes from you wise women of God.  I will say that all of this "hurry up and wait" will be replaced with keeping it spicy and alive, after I say, "I do."


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 6, 2009)

yodie said:


> Great thread ladies.  I just read everything.
> 
> I'm not married YET, so I'm taking notes from you wise women of God.  I will say that all of this "hurry up and wait" will be replaced with keeping it spicy and alive, after I say, "I do."


And you are a very WISE woman to be taking notes....


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## Laela (Aug 6, 2009)

Nice&Wavy... you're blessed to have such a wonderful, attentive hubby!!


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 6, 2009)

Laela said:


> Nice&Wavy... you're blessed to have such a wonderful, attentive hubby!!


Thank you, Laela...I am blessed and so favored by the Lord.  I didn't do anything special to deserve such a wonderful man...What God joins together, no man can put asunder...Halleujah!


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## Laela (Aug 6, 2009)

Amen to that.. I wouldn't give mine up for anything!! God truly is good and I feel blessed indeed.


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## Nice & Wavy (Aug 6, 2009)

Laela said:


> Amen to that.. I wouldn't give mine up for anything!! God truly is good and I feel blessed indeed.


You both are so blessed because you are married and God is in the midst of you!


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## Mrs.TheBronx (Aug 7, 2009)

Nice & Wavy said:


> You both are so blessed because you are married and God is in the midst of you!


 
Amen! Marriage is a beautiful thing that not everyone gets to experience, Thats why we (me) should cherish it every single day and not try not to take them for granted. I know we get used to being married, but we should be celebrating our marriage on a daily basics! God has blessed! He has been sooooo good to me! I can't even type the words!


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