52 Weeks Towards Divine Femininity

Maybe I do lol :sekret::sekret:

SN: Your smile is absolutely beautiful. It's so joyful and pure. :) Try to smile often, love others, dream big, and live hard! :rose:

I just know you were intentional in not mentioning a man, me likes it. My mindframe as of late is to understand that I need to be happy, regardless of my marital status:yep:. So yes, thank you very much!
 
I just know you were intentional in not mentioning a man, me likes it. My mindframe as of late is to understand that I need to be happy, regardless of my marital status:yep:. So yes, thank you very much!
Looooool you know me too well. I’ve been trying to read hat quote “Those who wish to be happy, are”. I’m 30 but I’m just now getting it lol. Happiness is not conditional. It’s a choice.
 
Sooo I was riding down the street and hit a pothole. Tore up my rim and burst my tire. I played the I don’t know what I’ll do. I don’t know how I’ll get this fixed. Old me would be like I got this. Instead I asked for help.

One of my male friends came to get me. He told me I should go to the dealership and see if they would fix it since I have a new-ish car. Well I thought back to that whole male voucher thing. I decided I would go but I needed to take a man with me. I went to the shop and hey said, “Nope your plan doesn’t cover it.” They were so aggressive about it that I just said okay and walked and sat outside.

The guy looked at me me started asking so many questions. Where’s the print out of her plan. How much does she pay a month. Show me where in the policy does it not cover her rim. What is the breakdown of how much it would cost.

Y’all how about they made a call to corporate and now my tire is getting fixed for free. They made a mistake and didn’t pull my entire account, and I pay for some little maintenance plan that also covers tires. They glanced at it and said nope.

So they promised it would be fixed by yesterday and afternoon. They said it was taking longer than expected because they were afraid of cracking my rim when they fixed it.

Guy called back this morning and went off. He told them if it’s that “hard” to fix the rim that means it’s also dangerous to drive on. Therefore, they should just replace the entire rim instead of going the cheap route. That’s the perk of having a new car.

Y’all my car is getting a new rim. Should be installed by the morning. I made sure to say thank you a million times in my sexy sweet sing song voice and just sit back while he did his thing. He played it so cool but I know his chest is all poked out lol. I’m so thankful.

I love being feminine. Some of the hard parts in life I don’t have to worry about. I can just sit back and relax.
 
^^^Amazing! That is probably my biggest hurdle. When it comes to my faith in God, yes I've been able to just let Him handle it. But in regards to other people (whether female/male friends), I'm just not there yet. It impacts my relationship with potential suitors in a very negative way.

Would love to figure out where this mindset comes from really, by going back to my childhood. I barely ever ask for help from anybody, unless it's truly necessary. Really don't know where it stems from.
 
^^^Amazing! That is probably my biggest hurdle. When it comes to my faith in God, yes I've been able to just let Him handle it. But in regards to other people (whether female/male friends), I'm just not there yet. It impacts my relationship with potential suitors in a very negative way.

Would love to figure out where this mindset comes from really, by going back to my childhood. I barely ever ask for help from anybody, unless it's truly necessary. Really don't know where it stems from.
I had this same problem. I’m just going to give some insight on how I was feeling.

I didn’t want others to help me because I didn’t want to have to owe the person back. My mother gave me a very negative connotation towards men. She told me they will take everything you have, and they do things to get something in return. I was told, “Don’t let them do anything for you because they will expect something in return.”

I shifted my point of view. First of all ALL men are not bad. They are mostly good. However with any human, you need clear cut boundaries that protect you and your wants.

Me shifting this point of view (that most men are good) helped move more open to them helping me. Why wouldn’t they want to help me?

Next the boundary issue (I had NO boundaries so a man could come in and do whatever and I didn’t trip about it because I was laissez faire. That was a problem and a set up to get hurt. I created some boundaries. One was when you do something for me I will show my gratitude but not with things that I don’t want to do. Giving is a gift.

Next, I learned the only thing you owe someone when they do something for you is a thank you. If they fall off for this...they were never there to begin with. I had to learn this through rotational dating. I’ve had a few spend a good bit of money on me. I dont owe them sex or any comparable service to make up for the fact they helped or gave money to me. I only owe them a thank you. This took a LOT of practice.

Then all of it came together two fold. I started talking to my accountability partner about this. @PeaceLover abd I were on the phone and a man wanted to help with my groceries while I was on the phone. She said” Priss why did you decline?” I said because this area is crazy and he could rob me if he put my groceries in the car.

She was like have you ever heard instances of this happening in the past in your area? Did you have an intuition that he was bad and he would rob you? Did you feel unsafe? What is a safe way to do this? Could he put them in your trunk and you would feel better? Where does this stem from?

I found out this stemmed from teachings I was given from my mother again. Ever since then I try to polish my femininity by LETTING another’s help me. I let others take out my trash. I let others help me by handling the car situation. I let my assistant open the doors for me. I let others carry heavy my heavy bags for me.

I also know how to respond now. Thank you and I smile so beautifully. I usually give some non sexual touch on the arm. I smile again. That’s it. That’s all that’s required. Even if they do try to proceed.....the way my boundaries are set up I just reply “That makes me uncomfortable.” Or “I’m not interested.” And I keep it moving.

I was reading this book called Between the World and Me and he was talking about how his grandmother made him constantly reflect. He had to reflect on why he was misbehaving in class to get to a higher consciousness level.

I think self reflection is a great practice. Peace Lover’s questions really helped me to slow down, figure out where some of my tactics were coming from, find my peace, and slowly allow love in by learning to let sincerely good men LOVE me. I deserved it.

HTH
 

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@PrissiSippi
@Supervixen
@TracyNicole
@PeaceLover
@Belle Du Jour
@SimplyWhole
@snoop
@Maracujá
@YvetteWithJoy
@LovingLady
@Jade Feria
@Meridian1944
@Sweetg
@Brwnbeauti
@LadyPBC
@intellectualuva
@tmv1
@rafikichick92
@cam2717
@CurliDiva
@Dee-Licious
@Jas123




Recap

Week 1: Create Femininity Goals. Find an accountability partner

Week 2: Print or Buy a planner. Make sure you write down and plan to do things that encompass your femininity. How many times will you cook for your family so they can practice dinner etiquette? How many minutes will you hold each child a day (10-15 minutes?) How will you polish your femininity EACH day, how will you spend one on one time with your spouse each day? Have you made time to go out with a female this week to talk girl talk? Make a plan, be intentional, and write it down.

Week 3: Be more present- Be aware of your surroundings. Don't be a phone zombie. Practice makes permanent. Constantly work on cultivating your femininity by being very present with DH, SO, your children, and friends. Choose human interactions vs social media interactions this week.

Week 4: Accept him- Accept him for who he is. This includes his strengths, his weaknesses, his goals, or lack of him. He is a person full of triumphs as well as flaws just like you. (This goal is continuous).

February- Inner Self Work
Week 5: Polish Your Poise- No one can take you out of your feminine grace except you. Work on not being reactive to problems and asserting your needs but in a gentle way. Work on your look, attitude, gratitude, gaze, and overall spirit.

Week 6: Self Preservation is Key- Learn to protect your peace. Put YOU first. Have a drama blocking plan to protect yourself.

Week 7: What's in a Voice- Work on your feminine voice. Smile. Have a sing-song sweet voice at all times...especially times of struggle.

Week 8: Rock Your Wardrobe- Aim to look feminine, put together, and GOOD every day.
Week 9: Turn Rituals Into Routine

March- Home Living
Week 10: Beautify Your Environment: Buy Fresh Flowers
Week 11: Focus on Your Home Aromas
Week 12: How Clean Is Your Home
Week 13: Set the Tone in Your Home: Make Your House a Haven

April- Refinement
Week 14: Clean Up Your Social Media Accounts
Week 15: Be more mysterious: Work on your Feminine Mystique
Week 16: Take the Help/Compliments
Week 17: Got Milk? Milk Baths

May- Strategically Selfish
Week 18: You Are the Prize
Week 19: Don’t Let them Move Your Goal Post
Week 20: Put On Your Oxygen Mask First
Week 21: Drop the need to be Right: Focus Instead
Week 22: Who are Your Male Vouchers?!

June- Feminine Refinement
Week 23- Leisure Time/ Become Well Read
Week 24- Be like Children; Not Childish but Childlike
Week 25- Let's Get Some Sunshine
Week 26- Communication 101: Stay in Control

July-
Week 27- Everything can be used against you.
Week 28- Compassionate
Week 29- Know Yourself What's your Feminine Archetype?'
Week 30- Use your Feminine Archetype to become a Force - Hone In On It
Week 31- Wine A Bit; You'll Feel a Little Bit Better

August - Etiquette
Week 32- Staircase Etiquette
Week 33-- Pose for Life - Crossed Legs Pose
Week 34- Keep it Classy (Exiting car doors)


Tips:
1. Do not rush- Take your time to enjoy life around you. Be present and in the moment.
2. Keep your knees and ankles together and make sure both feet are placed on the ground before standing.
3. Open the car door as wide as it possibly can before you get up. If you are riding in a Lyft, Uber, or taxi, wait for your driver to open the door if offered. LET them help you.
4. You can use your hand to help you get out of very low or very high vehicles.

Some pictures are more detailed tips are posted below and found from etiquette coach, @TheLadySim




Week 34 Challenge

1. Practice getting out of the car graciously.
2. Ask a friend/accountability trip to look at you get in and out of the car. Ask for tips on how to look better getting in and out of the car.
 
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Sooo I was riding down the street and hit a pothole. Tore up my rim and burst my tire. I played the I don’t know what I’ll do. I don’t know how I’ll get this fixed. Old me would be like I got this. Instead I asked for help.

One of my male friends came to get me. He told me I should go to the dealership and see if they would fix it since I have a new-ish car. Well I thought back to that whole male voucher thing. I decided I would go but I needed to take a man with me. I went to the shop and hey said, “Nope your plan doesn’t cover it.” They were so aggressive about it that I just said okay and walked and sat outside.

The guy looked at me me started asking so many questions. Where’s the print out of her plan. How much does she pay a month. Show me where in the policy does it not cover her rim. What is the breakdown of how much it would cost.

Y’all how about they made a call to corporate and now my tire is getting fixed for free. They made a mistake and didn’t pull my entire account, and I pay for some little maintenance plan that also covers tires. They glanced at it and said nope.

So they promised it would be fixed by yesterday and afternoon. They said it was taking longer than expected because they were afraid of cracking my rim when they fixed it.

Guy called back this morning and went off. He told them if it’s that “hard” to fix the rim that means it’s also dangerous to drive on. Therefore, they should just replace the entire rim instead of going the cheap route. That’s the perk of having a new car.

Y’all my car is getting a new rim. Should be installed by the morning. I made sure to say thank you a million times in my sexy sweet sing song voice and just sit back while he did his thing. He played it so cool but I know his chest is all poked out lol. I’m so thankful.

I love being feminine. Some of the hard parts in life I don’t have to worry about. I can just sit back and relax.

I love this!! I I love that you called someone to help and he actually made a huge difference. Too many women would have argued and forfeited all of their feminine energy to fight a losing battle. Those guys respected that you had another man taking care of you and it made them work harder. Men respect one another, even after having harsh words and being rude to one another. It doesn't work the same way for women.
 
Transparent Moment:

I need to work a little more on my appearance. Any tips feminine ladies?

My necessary positives is that now I wear makeup everyday. I also wear dresses almost everyday. I've been developing my skincare regimen in this challenge, so my skin is glowing too. BUT, I think I should do a little better with keeping my nails done, keeping my eyebrows waxed, and ironing my clothes. I think that's how I should use my planner. I probably could do a little better with complaining too. I don't complain much, but I could completely eradicate it.

As appearance goes, I need to make it more intentional and make sure that I keep making time for me. I've been doing other stuff like walking intentionally and reading to the baby (working on being nurturing when my toddler tries me), and journaling in my journal a few times each week. I'm making good progress from how I used to be.
 
I love this!! I I love that you called someone to help and he actually made a huge difference. Too many women would have argued and forfeited all of their feminine energy to fight a losing battle. Those guys respected that you had another man taking care of you and it made them work harder. Men respect one another, even after having harsh words and being rude to one another. It doesn't work the same way for women.
It really surprised me. I have been to that SAME car dealership and tried to negotiate for stuff about my car. No result. I even have called corporate and gotten the run around. The fact that he covered me in that instance, it really meant a lot to me.
 
I’m trying to find graceful pictures of people getting out of cars but whoo chile this is hard lol.
 

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Transparent Moment:

I need to work a little more on my appearance. Any tips feminine ladies?

My necessary positives is that now I wear makeup everyday. I also wear dresses almost everyday. I've been developing my skincare regimen in this challenge, so my skin is glowing too. BUT, I think I should do a little better with keeping my nails done, keeping my eyebrows waxed, and ironing my clothes. I think that's how I should use my planner. I probably could do a little better with complaining too. I don't complain much, but I could completely eradicate it.

As appearance goes, I need to make it more intentional and make sure that I keep making time for me. I've been doing other stuff like walking intentionally and reading to the baby (working on being nurturing when my toddler tries me), and journaling in my journal a few times each week. I'm making good progress from how I used to be.

Pick out your clothes and Sunday and iron all of them.
 
Transparent Moment:

I need to work a little more on my appearance. Any tips feminine ladies?

My necessary positives is that now I wear makeup everyday. I also wear dresses almost everyday. I've been developing my skincare regimen in this challenge, so my skin is glowing too. BUT, I think I should do a little better with keeping my nails done, keeping my eyebrows waxed, and ironing my clothes. I think that's how I should use my planner. I probably could do a little better with complaining too. I don't complain much, but I could completely eradicate it.

As appearance goes, I need to make it more intentional and make sure that I keep making time for me. I've been doing other stuff like walking intentionally and reading to the baby (working on being nurturing when my toddler tries me), and journaling in my journal a few times each week. I'm making good progress from how I used to be.

My appearance is my focus too right now. I’m trying to improve my wig game (I’m fairly new to wigs), keep my nails with at least press ons and do a full-face including lips and lashes whenever I go out. Weightloss is on going. DD1 got into a great public (read:free) full day Pre-K, so I’m planning to hit the gym with the DD2 immediately after dropping the DD1 off.

I don’t know how I’m going to swing a full face with the gym, I need to explore a bare minimum look.
 
My appearance is my focus too right now. I’m trying to improve my wig game (I’m fairly new to wigs), keep my nails with at least press ons and do a full-face including lips and lashes whenever I go out. Weightloss is on going. DD1 got into a great public (read:free) full day Pre-K, so I’m planning to hit the gym with the DD2 immediately after dropping the DD1 off.

I don’t know how I’m going to swing a full face with the gym, I need to explore a bare minimum look.

Eyebrows, eyes (liner/ mascara) and lip gloss go a long way.
 
Transparent Moment:

I need to work a little more on my appearance. Any tips feminine ladies?

My necessary positives is that now I wear makeup everyday. I also wear dresses almost everyday. I've been developing my skincare regimen in this challenge, so my skin is glowing too. BUT, I think I should do a little better with keeping my nails done, keeping my eyebrows waxed, and ironing my clothes. I think that's how I should use my planner. I probably could do a little better with complaining too. I don't complain much, but I could completely eradicate it.

As appearance goes, I need to make it more intentional and make sure that I keep making time for me. I've been doing other stuff like walking intentionally and reading to the baby (working on being nurturing when my toddler tries me), and journaling in my journal a few times each week. I'm making good progress from how I used to be.

Because of one of these threads, I started getting my nails done every 2-3 weeks about 2 years ago and I love it. Even when I don't feel great, I love that my nails are feminine and always pretty. The other day, my hair was a natural, messy bun which I thought looked pretty wild - not a cute messy bun. However, my nails were done and I was wearing a floral dress. I took my car in for service and I was helped by everyone. The attention from men was overwhelming. I'm always trying to look my best but even that day when I thought my hair was a mess, I got treated very well. Must be the feminine energy!
 
I met with my alumni group last night. I went to a school basically for women so nothing but old whites women were there. They told me since I’m so artsy and crafty they could see me taking up wrapping presents elegantly as a feminine hobby. They told me stories how their grandparents all wrapped nice presents with ribbons and intentional creases.

I have plenty of tape and wrapping paper and even a cricut so I think I might try this out!

I love how you get inspirational messsges towards polishing your femininity from fellow shipping with other women.
 
I need to practice taking compliments graciously. I always get complimented on all my new found dresses BUT I keep wanting to be relevant and make jokes about it instead of accepting the compliment.

For instance I will say, “Oh these are just my baby doll clothes”
People will say “They might be small but they’re so cute”
And I say girl I got it out the dream house closet while Ken doll was still sleeping.

That’s old Priss. I’m aware so I just want to document it but I will be stopping this today because next people will make subtle jokes about me and I won’t like it. I need to learn to be feminine, say thank you, and shut up.

I deserve my compliments. Every single one of them. I receive them. Amen. :giveheart:

Next time I get a compliment I will smile and humbly say, “Thank you.” Or “You really made my day. Thank you so much.” Period.

You treat others how to treat you by what you accept”
 
Because of one of these threads, I started getting my nails done every 2-3 weeks about 2 years ago and I love it. Even when I don't feel great, I love that my nails are feminine and always pretty. The other day, my hair was a natural, messy bun which I thought looked pretty wild - not a cute messy bun. However, my nails were done and I was wearing a floral dress. I took my car in for service and I was helped by everyone. The attention from men was overwhelming. I'm always trying to look my best but even that day when I thought my hair was a mess, I got treated very well. Must be the feminine energy!
Baby they will run to carry something for you, check on you more fervently, smile often and freely, and look out for you in more ways than one. That is the power of a dress. I looooove it.
 
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