Single and Ready to Mingle: 2011 Edition!

[BLESSED1]

yall are inspiring, i'm subscribing to this thread cuz i'm not there yet regarding the courage to put myself out there

i been personally "hiding" behind online dating for the last 5yrs so i'm not that comfortable using the offline world to meet guys yet

and i just got cheated on so i'm gonna spend some me time but then try to do what yall doing, good luck ladies (yall don't need it tho, already doing it big lol)

 

[Glib Gurl]

So, after about 2 months of being on the speed dating circuit, I'm noticing a trend . . . I keep running into the SAME PEOPLE at these events I am planning on going to a Valentine's Day event tomorrow and looking at the RSVPs I already know at least one dude coming . . . and he actually took out my bff after the last speed dating event we went to! LOL!

I may have to lay off these events for a while and let the roster repopulate a bit.

Another funny thing - last week when I arrived at church (just before the sermon ) I asked this older male usher if he could seat me. "I have a seat JUST for you!" he said. Okay, why did he usher me way up to the middle of the church and then seat me right next to this dude who I met at the first speed dating event I went to back in December? We didn't "match" and he I noticed even then that he was supershy . . . he only reconfirmed it last week when he was too shy to even pass the communion plate! Anyways, I re-introduced myself at the end of service. He was pleasant enough. Well, at least I know of ONE eligibel bachelor at my church . . . lol!

 

[Glib Gurl]

Is it too late to join?

Absolutely not - this is an open challenge. C'mon in!

I'll be going to a speed dating event...
What do people wear to those?

A previous poster gave you good advice. Generally I try to wear somethign that I would wear on a first date . . . sexy and cute, but not something where I look like I'm trying *too* hadr . . .

Are we allowed to post events that we know about in this thread? I don't want to break any forum rules.

By all means! Help a sista out and post them events!

keep your head up...Thats why we post in here, to support and encourage each other..Dont let this deter you from going out again..Its been plenty of nights where Ive been unsuccessful, but you cant meet "him" or "them" sitting at home on the couch..If you feeling average, be daring with your hair or makeup, wear something out of the ordinary..Ive been stepping out of my comfort zone so much this year...I came to the conclusion that whatever energy Im putting out, is why I attract the men I do...So I have to do something different..Its been a challenge for me, but Im determined.

Thanks so much for posting this - it's an encouragement to me also

i been personally "hiding" behind online dating for the last 5yrs so i'm not that comfortable using the offline world to meet guys yet

I'm sorry to hear about your breakup . . . has online dating worked well for you?

 

[BLESSED1]

Glib Gurl honestly online dating hasn't worked well for me but its somewhat my fault

i think a lot of men have been using it as like a meat market approach to hookup

but i was looking for a serious rlshp so it didn't work for me

but if someone is looking for a non committal hookup, i'd suggest it

I'm just basing it off my personal experiences, and Match was really bad for me
They don't screen those men at all

but i had a good experience w/the first site I ever used, blackchristianpeoplemeet.com

i actually still talk to my ex from that site, we met there in 06 and dated for a year

but it was a very long distance rlshp that was hard to maintain so i let it go & we agreed to be friends

i'm not saying online dating is bad, it just wasn't working for me & I noticed a rotating circuit after awhile like u said happened w/speed dating

and I can't speak for the million other dating sites out there, like I said i only used match and BCPM

but i noticed i'm not as discerning as i should be, spent the last year giving losers access to my heart when I should've runaway like kanye

and i was putting insecurity vibes out, so i believe Universe sent insecure, hurtful guys back to me

i'm working on being confident w/out being arrogant, and throwing out love & positivity

so I get that back from men, whether it leads to a rlshp or not

Oh & i'm one step closer to being like yall, i just posted a March Madness meetup for next month at a popular sports bar with one of my female meetup groups, where i suggested we get glammed up even though everyone at this bar dresses in sports jerseys

I told them we'd stand out while having fun and possibly attract some available guys

regardless, have fun and I put myself out there. I should be ready to mingle by then

 

[MDreamz]

I did it! I met my match January 15,2011 and we became an official couple January 29th! I have never been so happy! How did I meet him? A friend gave him my number he called and we found out that we have so much in common. We meet up for brunch on the January 15th and it we've been growing closer and closer ever since that "Hello".

 

[keykee]

This weekend was sort of a bust.. but I understand sometimes it will be.

Friday night some work friends went out to a brewery for some drinks.. (it was great.. crowd really wasn't my type).. So we migrated to a bar uptown that had a cover band.. great music.. we were all dancing and having a great time. There were LOTS of men there.. but they were all standing on the sidelines watching all the ladies dance. It was like they were waiting for the ladies to ask them to dance. Seriously it seems like a lot of men are more insecure than women are.
I didn't meet anyone that night. But I had an amazing time!

Last night my friend and I went to a so-called "upscale bar" in the pretentious area of King West in Toronto. The club was supposed to be 28+.. i ended up dancing with some guy who was 24.. (wtf?).. I tried to make the best of it.. but it sucked.. once again there were a lot of men.. but .. no...horrid.. and the worst part was the DJ sucked too.

Anyway.. it's Sunday and I'm already looking forward to next weekend... and its a long weekend too! woohoo! Happy Hunting Girls!!

 

[lushcoils]

Eharmony is having free communication for the rest of the month, if you wanted to try it out without paying.

 

[Lovelylife]

Eharmony is having free communication for the rest of the month, if you wanted to try it out without paying.

Thanks, I just put up my profile, I'll test it out until the 28th.
I only had 7 matches though.
If don't get a message by the 28th, I'll just go to another site.

 

[blueberryd]

You're in DC right? DC women do not play around when they go out! The women to men ratio is bad so those chicks are cutthroat because competition is fierce.

Ya'll haven't seen ANYTHING til u come to atlanta...it's ridiculous..i've lived in DMV and miami.. and ATLANTA is by far the most competitive damn city of them all! its a jungle out there.. lmfao

 

[Imani]

^^^Speaking of the A. I will be in Atlanta this weekend for a little bit, anyone know of any bars/lounges etc I can swing by Saturday night by myself?

I've decided not to even be pressed about meeting people this year, not romantically anyway, but I'm just making an effort to get out the house, and look cute and be social at least once a month.

 

[Imani]

Ya'll haven't seen ANYTHING til u come to atlanta...it's ridiculous..i've lived in DMV and miami.. and ATLANTA is by far the most competitive damn city of them all! its a jungle out there.. lmfao

blueberryd I guess I'm just used to Atl since its really the only major city I frequent for the past several years. Its become the norm to me so it doesn't seem that bad. Whenever I relocate I will probably be pleasantly surprised to see everywhere isn't like this.

 

[SuchMagnificent]

sooo Im headed to a small happy hour...not really in the mood, in dire need of a relaxer..But, Im gonna make it work...crosses fingers and toes

 

[Papoose]

I'm in Houston and I need to get out more often. *sigh*

I'm in Houston too. Maybe we can venture out together with SuchMagnificence, split up & meet again throughout the night to compare notes. I really have to get out there...

 

[Papoose]

So....

I have been seriously MIA. I had no idea that one of the classes that I'm in would monopolize so much of my time. There are a few events coming up that I do plan to check out:

1. Houston Rodeo
2. Some music festival in Austin in March (I just read about it in Ebony last night)
3. Mardi Gras (I really want to go to New Orleans, but Galveston might have to do. The girls that invited me to go with them are way too immature & I'm not babysitting anybody!)

I really need to make an effort to check out some new places in Houston. As large as this city is, there has to be some men here somewhere! It's times like these that I miss my dense east coast cities. It's easier to just bump into people.

So, this yt girl I know swears by meeting dudes at the gym. I'm not all about it, btu she joined this gym & met a dude within 2 weeks. She's been coloring with, i mean, seein him ever since. How do you guys feel about meeting guys at the gym? Not my thing, but I may need to change my mind...

 

[lushcoils]

I would love to meet guys at the gym since I go there all of the time. But I'm still trying to figure how out how to get them to approach me and/or check me out. They seem really into their workout or hanging with their boys.

 

[Imani]

I would feel a little self conscious meeting people at the gym. I sweat alot and usually look a hot mess when I work out.

Sent from my T-Mobile myTouch 3G using Long Hair Care Forum App

 

[lushcoils]

That's funny because I always read online about most women saying they get hit on at the gym when they are looking their messiest and extra sweaty, and smelling gross lol. I'm always like wow, maybe I go to the wrong gym or something. It's my PWI school gym, but I'm sure many women here get hit on at their PWI school gym, so I don't get it. But whatev, I guess I need to learn how to meet men other ways.

 

[SuchMagnificent]

So....

I have been seriously MIA. I had no idea that one of the classes that I'm in would monopolize so much of my time. There are a few events coming up that I do plan to check out:

1. Houston Rodeo
2. Some music festival in Austin in March (I just read about it in Ebony last night)
3. Mardi Gras (I really want to go to New Orleans, but Galveston might have to do. The girls that invited me to go with them are way too immature & I'm not babysitting anybody!)

I really need to make an effort to check out some new places in Houston. As large as this city is, there has to be some men here somewhere! It's times like these that I miss my dense east coast cities. It's easier to just bump into people.

So, this yt girl I know swears by meeting dudes at the gym. I'm not all about it, btu she joined this gym & met a dude within 2 weeks. She's been coloring with, i mean, seein him ever since. How do you guys feel about meeting guys at the gym? Not my thing, but I may need to change my mind...

Yes, all my male associates swear that I need to be in the gym on certain days so I can see all the men folk that come through...However, I dont want anyone to mistake me for a 16 yr old girl because Im so small.. I would be really self conscious in there...Most of the women in the gym have some nice curves going on and all I have are baby speed bumps.. oh well..If I could gain a little thickness, I might consider it.

 

[lushcoils]

Oh that could explain it. Lol I'm small too. And I'm assuming if you don't have things jumping around while you are working out, men aren't going to look. Oh well, at least I can work out in peace.

Ending these last 2 weeks with some nice non ghetto club events. Looking forward to it.

 

[MummysGirl]

.............

 

[SuchMagnificent]

hey yall..what yall doing tonite. im havin chinese takeout and wine tonight..glass#3..going to a house party tomorrow, any plans?>.......

 

[Evo-ny]

OMG, I need someone to pick me up and throw me out of my apartment! There's some great acid jazz playing at a small club downtown, tix are cheap, but I'm already making up excuses not to go. I asked one friend if she wanted to come with, but she wasn't interested. I'm already dressed, hair is swanging, but while half of me is ready to roll, the other half is clawing to stay in for the night.

 

[Imani]

Looks like I will be relocating in the near future. Will be eyeballing all the DMV posts. I'm excited! I hear there are some fine men in DC! lol

 

[lushcoils]

^^^
There are lots of fine men here of all races. Now whether they will ever approach you, or ask you on a date, or are even into women is another story.

 

[Evo-ny]

Well, I got off my butt and headed to the venue. Didn't meet or talk to any guys save for the married drummer (which by rare coincidence found out we both attended the same high school and he knew my sister) and all the good looking ones were taken by the amazing singers.
But the music was to die for and it was totally worth it. Definitely going to the next show, hopefully I'll do better then.

 

[Imani]

^^^
There are lots of fine men here of all races. Now whether they will ever approach you, or ask you on a date, or are even into women is another story.

My homeboy who is from DC and moved back a year ago told me "oh, dc will LOVE you, you will get plenty of play". I am not sure why he thinks that and he claims its no where near as many gay men as atl.

I'm not even trying to date right now actually, really I just want to SEE some fine men at least, lol. If some actually holler thats just a bonus. I can't even think of the last time I even saw or was in the presence of a fine man.

 

[SuchMagnificent]

Im at dave and busters sitting at the bar...we'll see how long this last...

Sent from my Sprint HTC Evo using Long Hair Care Forum App

 

[keykee]

Went out last night to a suburb bar.. it was good.. Really didn't think I was going to talk to anyone.. spoke to one guy who was new in town... Nothing will come of it.. why? he asked if I wanted to continue the "party"' at his place..I wish I could wear a sign on my forehead saying.. NOT LOOKING TO HOOK UP TONIGHT!

I have realised I have no problem meeting men.. it seems to be just meeting the wrong ones constantly. Makes me wonder what attracts these types of guys to me. I don't dress in a revealing way.. I make good conversation.. I don't get it... anyway,.. movng on....

Oh yes.. my other beef.. Black men don't talk to me anymore.. ever since I went natural I haven't spoken to ONE! Why?

 

[chocolat79]

Looks like I will be relocating in the near future. Will be eyeballing all the DMV posts. I'm excited! I hear there are some fine men in DC! lol

And make sure to protect yourself. The HIV rate is ridiculous. According to statistics, it's the highest in the nation, so make sure all those fine men wrap it up.

Otherwise, that's great news!!

 

[Imani]

And make sure to protect yourself. The HIV rate is ridiculous. According to statistics, it's the highest in the nation, so make sure all those fine men wrap it up.

Otherwise, that's great news!!

I don't do casual sex But yeah if I got serious w/someone and decided to take it to that level, it would def be wrapped up and also getting tested together, and thats for any city I live in.

I'm just ready to see some real life eye candy.