Sense and Sensuality ("Loving" Spinny)

[SimplyWhole]

I'm on my phone right now and have a headache from typing. Does anyone else care to chime in (Enyo)? Are there any books about this already?

Also, does anyone have any books on how to have more presence of mind and be in the moment?

The Presence Process by Michael Brown - http://thepresenceportal.com/



The book called THE PRESENCE PROCESS is an invitation into a 10-week experiential journey empowering us to integrate traumatic childhood imprinting impacting our current life experience with unconscious behaviors such as addictions, diseases, and all manners of reactive behavior.

The book ALCHEMY OF THE HEART is a perceptual journey unraveling the perceptual matrix keeping us transfixed by fear, anger, and grief.

Integrating our childhood imprinting requires becoming aware of the suppressed condition of our emotional body, of our consequential behaviors of self-sedation and control, and of what is required to take full responsibility for this inner condition. Such a journey is personal and individual. It requires an approach moving us beyond selective group-mentality so we may interact with ourselves and all who enter our daily experience in a consistent, compassionate, and responsible manner.

This website is created to support anyone embarking on the experiential exploration of emotional growth. It contains all the tools, insights, and guidance required for any sincere individual to transcend the trap of ‘trying to feel better’. It instead empowers us to ‘get better at feeling’.

The writings, audios, and experiential practices discussed within THE PRESENCE PORTAL have as their core intent the validation of our individual life experience. This validation is offered in a manner assisting us to perceive that what is happening to us right now - in each moment - is our true teaching. Once we experientially real eyes this to be so, and become aware of how to respond consciously, we free ourselves of drama and interference.

 

[Enyo]

This thread has me thinking about masculine and feminine aspects of the universe.

I think masculinity is easier to describe cause you can see it. It's active, physical, inventive, sometimes violent.

What does this have to do with the universe? When I studied the universe I found out that we all come from a star that died a long time ago. That star literally gave its life so that we could be born. To me the creation of that star was very masculine and here's why:

When stars are formed there's a ton of action that goes on. Hydrogen atoms interact with each other, to become a dense, extremely hot gas cloud. Then nuclear fusion occurs and hydrogen turns into helium and blahbity blah blah blah. If u want to know more about stars you can visit khan academy but they're pretty awesome.

How does femininity fit into all of this? Gravity is the force that holds everything together and keeps that star from exploding. It literally grounds us. You can't see or feel it and as far as I know, we don't even know what it's made of. We also know it can't be duplicated.

To me femininity and its importance is really hard to explain, especially to men. Just like gravity, consciousness, feelings and intuition.

Layluh

I think what we should keep in mind is that the birth process itself is actually pretty violent which is why so many women fear it. There is a lot of pain, frequent and mild dis-figuration of to the body (i.e. ripping of the vagina, stretch marks, permanent loosening of skin), and potential for death. It's not odd for people to faint at the sight of a baby being born which amuses me. It's something that is frequently called beautiful and yet people are often disturbed by it. This is why I've always said that working through pain is a very feminine action. If men had to give birth, there would be way less people. They just don't have the tolerance that we do.

It's true that women balance things out because we have a knack for subconsciously soothing the male ego and distracting him from wanting to subdue other men merely for the sake of feeding that ego. Yes, we are often seen as possessions and therefore worth fighting for (I think people who say it's always about love are overly romantic), but it helps if the possession in question (us) is able to mediate and influence both sides. But I also think that women have a more refined sense of cruelty. We are not as physically capable as most men, so we have to rely on whit, cunning, and the ability to "razzle dazzle" powerful men into doing what we want. A lot of wars have been both started and terminated by using a combination of cruel cunning and wicked subtlety (feminine) and brute force (masculine).

I believe what we should remember is that the masculine/feminine dynamic is not always positive (like in wars), but it's almost always necessary. This is why we see gender roles in every species and human group. If the balance is not there, chaos will ensue.



My mind often goes to the gay community and prisons when we talk about this. I believe homosexuality is rare, but very normal which is why a same-sex couple will almost always follow the masculine/feminine model. It's something most of us are programmed to do regardless of our sexual preference. And just like straights, gays may have a "weaker" masculine/feminine dynamic, but it's still there. I know a committed gay couple and they are both the stereotypical androgynous lesbians, one of them is definitely the leader and takes care of business while the other nurtures.



As for prisons, a man who is not necessarily super-feminine will sometimes become effeminate in order to balance out the overly masculine dynamic of prison. He will often align with a masculine prisoner and basically become a couple. Whenever I see this happening, it interests me because it mimics what happens on the outside. Masculine men are kept happy by the presence of feminine energy in their lives and the feminine person receives a nice amount of protection from the masculine partner.

 

[Layluh]

Dh just text me and said he has a surprise for me! This man has hardly ever gotten me anything y'all. So I'm excited.

I won't know what it is til next week though cause I'm doing 2 weeks of annual training with the army.

 

[Enyo]

I just took the dating persona test on OK Cupid. Here are my results:
Mature. Responsible. Aristocratic. Excuse me. The Priss.

Prisses are the smartest of all female types. You’re highly perceptive, and confident in your judgements. You’d take brutal honesty over superficiality any time—your friends always know where they stand with you. You’re completely unfake. Don’t tell me that’s not a word. You’re also excellent at redirecting internal negative energy.

These facts indicate people are often intimidated by you. They also fall for you, hard. You have a distant, composed allure that many find irresistible. If only more of them lived up to your standards.

You were probably the last among your friends to have sex. And the first to pretend that you’re pregnant. LOL. Though you’re inclined to use sex as weapon, at least it’s not as one of mass destruction. You’re choosier than most about your partners. A supportive relationship is what you’re really after. Whether you know it or not, you need something steady & long-term. And soothing.

Yup. I love it. Especially the 2nd paragraph which basically confirms my Coquette status.

 

[ladysaraii]

^^^ Ohh I'm taking one when I get home. Is it free? I had one from eharmony the month I was on there.

 

[Enyo]

Yep, it's free: http://www.okcupid.com/the-dating-persona-test

 

[ladysaraii]

So here are my results

The Sonnet

Deliberate Gentle Love Dreamer (DGLD)


Romantic, hopeful, and composed. You are the Sonnet. Get it? Composed?

Sonnets want Love and have high ideals about it. They’re conscientious people, caring & careful. You yourself have deep convictions, and you devote a lot of thought to romance and what it should be. This will frighten away most potential mates, but that’s okay, because you’re very choosy with your affections anyway. You’d absolutely refuse to date someone dumber than you, for instance.

Lovers who share your idealized perspective, or who are at least willing to totally throw themselves into a relationship, will be very, very happy with you. And you with them. You’re already selfless and compassionate, and with the right partner, there’s no doubt you can be sensual, even adventurously so.

You probably have lots of female friends, and they have a special soft spot for you. Babies do, too, at the tippy-top of their baby skulls.

LOL! This is very true. (I don't know if that's a good thing or not). I love doing this stuff, it's like when I started reading about my Venus sign in astrology. That explained soooo much.

Now to finish AoS to see what type this makes me. I suspect that with the type of person I am, I will have to work harder to become that seductress and keep from becoming the nice girl that gets walked over.

 

[wigsnatcha3000]

This was really accurate. The only bit that was wrong was the part about not wanting a serious relationship because that is what I want right now.

Capable. Trustworthy. Carnal. The Intern.
From our experience, Interns are nice girls who would really, really like us to come on to them. They, like you, must be looking for sex, preferably from someone good-looking and successful. So... what are you doing later? Oh, okay, cool. Well, maybe next time? Okay, okay, jeez.
The thing is, you’re a little bit quiet, so men think you’re waiting for them to start things. You do like sex a lot, they’re right about that, but few of them realize you’re a genuinely thoughtful person.
You’re choosy, not wanting to get mixed up with just anyone. Girls can get away with this kind of selectiveness for some reason. Most guys have to take whatever’s lying around, passed out.
You’re not necessarily looking for a steady relationship right now; that’s cool. Be careful to avoid people trying to tie you down to anything other than bedposts.

 

[belleama]

Here are my results (I feel like an arsehole)...


Your results are in! You are...

The Sudden Departure Random Brutal Love Master (RBLM)

Sweet. Dear. Loving. At Gate 18. Final call. You are The Sudden Departure.

You’ve been in a lot of serious relationships. More than a few have ended ugly. Uglily. Whatever. Our guess is that you’re a really fantastic girl who doesn’t really know what she wants, and you’ve broken a few hearts as a result. You fall for people easily, and you enjoy the feeling of falling in love, but once you’re there, either boredom or the old “grass is greener” syndrome sets in. The mind wanders, and with it goes the flesh. And then the toiletries.

We know you’re not the classic “love ’em and leave ’em” type, at least not in a purely sexual sense. You have too many serious bonding tendencies for that. But even though you’re theoretically looking to settle down, you don’t settle long on one person. “Serial monogamist” is probably something you hear a lot. “Emotionally loose” is another way to put it. To the poor guys eating your dust and sniffing your panties, it doesn’t really make much difference. Of course, it’s not really your fault that people get hurt. You have every right to move on when you choose.


*So I'm guessing this means I'm broken or something? :/

 

[Rocky91]

Layluh, you sound like an old school French feminist. I dig Cixous and others like her.

Enyo, I just spent 10 days in Hawaii for my graduation present! I loooooved it and even considered looking for teaching jobs there but the dating thing was a big drawback. Every black man I saw was with a non-black woman. Best of luck to you!

 

[FemmeFatale]

Hey ladies..I've been feeling very down lately and I'm not really sure why. I actually had to leave work early it got so bad.

My energy level was so low and all I felt was an immense level of blah and sadness. The nurse at work told me that she wanted me to get some blood work done just to make sure that physically I'm ok. She took my temp, blood pressure and they checked out fine.

 

[yasunset]

Finally made it to the end of this thread!

I'm ready to order Powerful and Feminine and maybe one other starter book.... Perhaps Mama Gena's?

I really want a new set of waist beads.

I had someone bring me back a set when he went home to Nigeria... I haven't put them on though... I'm scared of wrapping his bad vibes around my womb . Maybe I should just make them myself.

 

[Enyo]

Layluh, you sound like an old school French feminist. I dig Cixous and others like her.

Enyo, I just spent 10 days in Hawaii for my graduation present! I loooooved it and even considered looking for teaching jobs there but the dating thing was a big drawback. Every black man I saw was with a non-black woman. Best of luck to you!

Awesome! What island?

I actually don't mind not having a large pool of black men to date. I find as I've gotten older my dating pool has become increasingly paler. It's kind of disappointing, but understandable considering my interests and direction in life. I'd prefer another African-American, but since I date for pleasure and not for the sake of finding a marriage partner and don't want kids, I'm not as worried about it. We are only 2% of the population in Hawaii.

It's kind of funny because I went to OK Cupid to look at my profile in order to update it to reflect my new location. My plan was to open up the account so I could work on it (it was deactivated) and shut it down again. However, OKC makes you leave your profile open for one week before you can deactivate again. In that week I got 6 messages from 6 different guys. I was shocked because I'd average 2-3 messages a week when my location was Maryland. Out of the 6 guys, 4 were white, 1 was Asian, and the other was standard Hawaiian hapa. In addition to that, a few white guys and a mixed guy (Asian/White aka hapa haole) rated me 4-5 stars but didn't send me a message.

I totally was not expecting that - especially from the Asian and the hapa haole because their dating pool is massive. I want to ask why in the world they were interested in me, but that's giving off the impression that white or mixed girls are better and therefore should be the top pick. I can understand the white guys, though. I find there is a huge population of really laid back "is what it is" type of white boys. They always came across as being open.

 

[Enyo]

*So I'm guessing this means I'm broken or something? :/

belleama I dunno. You sound kind of badazz to me. If you were a movie character, I'd probably own the DVD. If the results are accurate and you don't like it, I'd work on changing it. If you're comfortable, I'd just leave it alone. You're not broken.

 

[FoxyMoxie]

The Wild Rose.
Random Brutal Love Dreamer.

Colorful, but unpicked. You are The Wild Rose.
Prone to bouts of cynicism, sarcasm, and thorns, you excite a certain kind of man. Hoping to gather you up, he flirts and winks and asks you out, ultimately professing his love. Then you make him bleed. Why? Because you’re the rare, independent, self-sufficient kind of woman who does want love, but not from a weakling.
You don’t seem to take yourself too seriously, and that’s refreshing. You aren’t uptight; you don’t over-plan. Romance-wise, sex isn’t a top priority—a true relationship would be preferable. For your age, you haven’t had a lot of bonafide love experience, though, and this kind of gets to core of the issue. You’re very selective.
The problem is them, not you, right? You have lofty standards that few measure up to. You’re out there all right, but not to be picked up by just anyone.

This fits me perfectly. It's almost scary.

 

[RegaLady]

Finally made it to the end of this thread!

I'm ready to order Powerful and Feminine and maybe one other starter book.... Perhaps Mama Gena's?

I really want a new set of waist beads.

I had someone bring me back a set when he went home to Nigeria... I haven't put them on though... I'm scared of wrapping his bad vibes around my womb . Maybe I should just make them myself.

I think you should I don't play with spiritual stuff cause you never know what evergy those things carry. Make them yourself and do so putting every love into it

 

[RegaLady]

Hey ladies..I've been feeling very down lately and I'm not really sure why. I actually had to leave work early it got so bad.

My energy level was so low and all I felt was an immense level of blah and sadness. The nurse at work told me that she wanted me to get some blood work done just to make sure that physically I'm ok. She took my temp, blood pressure and they checked out fine.

Sorry about that!

Have you been around someone with low levels of good energy? I had a relative who went through something like this, as well have. And she traced it back to an argument she had with some random guy in a club. His negativity got the best of her and she was in a foul mood for about 2 weeks. PMS is another cause.

Also sometimes our bodies may be telling us to rest and take it easy. Whatever it is for you, I hope your resolve it and feel better.

 

[LovelyLouboutin]

So here are my results

The Sonnet

Deliberate Gentle Love Dreamer (DGLD)

Romantic, hopeful, and composed. You are the Sonnet. Get it? Composed?

Sonnets want Love and have high ideals about it. They’re conscientious people, caring & careful. You yourself have deep convictions, and you devote a lot of thought to romance and what it should be. This will frighten away most potential mates, but that’s okay, because you’re very choosy with your affections anyway. You’d absolutely refuse to date someone dumber than you, for instance.

Lovers who share your idealized perspective, or who are at least willing to totally throw themselves into a relationship, will be very, very happy with you. And you with them. You’re already selfless and compassionate, and with the right partner, there’s no doubt you can be sensual, even adventurously so.

You probably have lots of female friends, and they have a special soft spot for you. Babies do, too, at the tippy-top of their baby skulls.

LOL! This is very true. (I don't know if that's a good thing or not). I love doing this stuff, it's like when I started reading about my Venus sign in astrology. That explained soooo much.

Now to finish AoS to see what type this makes me. I suspect that with the type of person I am, I will have to work harder to become that seductress and keep from becoming the nice girl that gets walked over.

I'm a sonnet also!

 

[RegaLady]

Ha!

I got The Priss

Mature. Responsible. Aristocratic. Excuse me. The Priss.
Prisses are the smartest of all female types. You’re highly perceptive, and confident in your judgements. You’d take brutal honesty over superficiality any time—your friends always know where they stand with you. You’re completely unfake. Don’t tell me that’s not a word. You’re also excellent at redirecting internal negative energy.
These facts indicate people are often intimidated by you. They also fall for you, hard. You have a distant, composed allure that many find irresistible. If only more of them lived up to your standards.
You were probably the last among your friends to have sex. And the first to pretend that you’re pregnant. LOL. Though you’re inclined to use sex as weapon, at least it’s not as one of mass destruction. You’re choosier than most about your partners. A supportive relationship is what you’re really after. Whether you know it or not, you need something steady & long-term. And soothing.

Interesting. I hope this doesn't mean I come off as an Ice Queen

 

[FemmeFatale]

Sorry about that!

Have you been around someone with low levels of good energy? I had a relative who went through something like this, as well have. And she traced it back to an argument she had with some random guy in a club. His negativity got the best of her and she was in a foul mood for about 2 weeks. PMS is another cause.

Also sometimes our bodies may be telling us to rest and take it easy. Whatever it is for you, I hope your resolve it and feel better.

There's just been a lot on my mind for a while and I guess it finally took a toll on me, especially with me moving, feeling alone, just getting over my period and the season changing. However, today I feel better.. I went and got a Brazilian wax so I'm feeling very sexy plus I also got to bask in the sun for a bit. My cousin, friends and I are about to hit the city in a few for a trunk show, dinner and drink.

There are several things that I have pinpointed that I will work on immediately, I fell of working out and taking my vitamins since the last month and a half have been so hectic. Tomorrow I will be back in the gym and will clean up my eating

Thanks for asking btw.

 

[FemmeFatale]

Ugh I got the maid of honor with that quiz, smh.

 

[belleama]

belleama I dunno. You sound kind of badazz to me. If you were a movie character, I'd probably own the DVD. If the results are accurate and you don't like it, I'd work on changing it. If you're comfortable, I'd just leave it alone. You're not broken.

Well that's one way to look at it.

LOL! Seriously though, I'm not really sure I'm completely comfortable with it. But I'm not exactly unhappy with my life choices. I love the fact that I can walk away from one person and pick up with someone new quickly. I also enjoy the fact that I can pick up and go and meet new people wherever I go.

I don't like the implication that I'm not a faithful person though because that is completely not me. I'm okay with the fact that you may be here today but gone tomorrow and knowing that I have the right and responsibility to my self to do the same, when needed. I hope that makes sense.

 

[ladysaraii]

There's just been a lot on my mind for a while and I guess it finally took a toll on me, especially with me moving, feeling alone, just getting over my period and the season changing. However, today I feel better.. I went and got a Brazilian wax so I'm feeling very sexy plus I also got to bask in the sun for a bit. My cousin, friends and I are about to hit the city in a few for a trunk show, dinner and drink.

There are several things that I have pinpointed that I will work on immediately, I fell of working out and taking my vitamins since the last month and a half have been so hectic. Tomorrow I will be back in the gym and will clean up my eating

Thanks for asking btw.

Maybe you just needed to be in your "well" for a bit. (I've been reading men are from mars women are from Venus)

 

[RegaLady]

Maybe you just needed to be in your "well" for a bit. (I've been reading men are from mars women are from Venus)

ladysaraii

What does that mean? What happends there?

 

[AmiJay]

Has anyone stopped another woman and told her she looked good? I've really been in my own mind with the big move coming up soon, so I have not done it recently. There was a lady on the train that I really wanted to compliment. Everything about her was so right. Body, face, hair, outfit, and attitude. I'm regretting not saying anything to her.

I do. I feel like it's important and I try to give black women compliments. They usually look at me with surprise and say thank you. I told a big chick who was rocking some PINK sweats and tshirt that hot pink was pretty on her skin. The sweats were too small but I focused on the positive. I don't see black women all the time so I try to speak and be positive when I do.

 

[Rocky91]

Awesome! What island?

I actually don't mind not having a large pool of black men to date. I find as I've gotten older my dating pool has become increasingly paler. It's kind of disappointing, but understandable considering my interests and direction in life. I'd prefer another African-American, but since I date for pleasure and not for the sake of finding a marriage partner and don't want kids, I'm not as worried about it. We are only 2% of the population in Hawaii.

It's kind of funny because I went to OK Cupid to look at my profile in order to update it to reflect my new location. My plan was to open up the account so I could work on it (it was deactivated) and shut it down again. However, OKC makes you leave your profile open for one week before you can deactivate again. In that week I got 6 messages from 6 different guys. I was shocked because I'd average 2-3 messages a week when my location was Maryland. Out of the 6 guys, 4 were white, 1 was Asian, and the other was standard Hawaiian hapa. In addition to that, a few white guys and a mixed guy (Asian/White aka hapa haole) rated me 4-5 stars but didn't send me a message.

I totally was not expecting that - especially from the Asian and the hapa haole because their dating pool is massive. I want to ask why in the world they were interested in me, but that's giving off the impression that white or mixed girls are better and therefore should be the top pick. I can understand the white guys, though. I find there is a huge population of really laid back "is what it is" type of white boys. They always came across as being open.

I was on Oahu and the Big island.
And don't you dare be surprised at those "other guys" digging you. Sometimes sexy is sexy, lol. I got hit on while on the beach quite a bit while soaking up the sun.

 

[collegeDoll]

My results from the OK Cupid quiz is Genghis Khunt
Random Brutal Sex Master (RBSM) lol:

Needless to say, I've love to learn how to be more comfortable in a more submissive role. I attract men with no issue but I can be quite cold after the initial excitement wears off, and I admit that I treat them as objects sometimes. (But when I do care, I love nothing more than making that man happy) I'd love to become a better person honestly and learn to have a healthy relationship. (Can anyone relate?)

You (feminine, tactful) woman are so admirable. I'm starting with Fascinating Womanhood. Love this thread

 

[stephluv]

Soooo between this thread, that Rich man thread and the hourglass thread I am really feeling myself lol Too bad my skin isnt smh

Anyone got tips on how to get flawless skin or atleast look like it...I used to use Mary Kay makeup but in this humid weather I cannot put on foundation that goins to just have me looking greasy but I want my dark spots covered!!! The skin on my body is fine...I even cleared up my chest and back...but my face smh...i'm still on teenage yrs except instead of little cystic bumps I got red/white spots smh

SN: been using those crest white strips to whiten smile, brought more jewelry such as pearls and bracelets, gonna get me an anklet to bring attention to my slim ankles lol STILL wearing my corset thanks to you ladies!!

 

[belleama]

stephluv which hourglass thread are you talking about?

 

[robot.]

Wow you guys Last night a friend (asian man) was driving me home and as I was pulling into my apartment complex a black man in a car passing by screamed "**** you!!!" how disgusting