Sense and Sensuality ("Loving" Spinny)

[Enyo]

@Enyo that's really sweet of you (informing them of what's to come) I probably would act completely innocent as if I had no clue how much power my kitty had

Haha! I used to do that, but the effect on the men could be devastating. Some of them actually stopped calling me because they were so ashamed (they came back when I told them it was OK). If I'm having sex with a man, it means care enough about him enough to not want to hurt his feelings. I think a key to being a good lover is to help your partner feel comfortable. I honestly don't think I'm amazing in bed. I think what keeps the men coming back is that I make them feel like they are the amazing ones. Being aware of what can damage their performance (which is often directly related to their self-esteem) and doing your best to avoid it is important.

 

[FemmeFatale]

Haha! I used to do that, but the effect on the men could be devastating. Some of them actually stopped calling me because they were so ashamed (they came back when I told them it was OK). If I'm having sex with a man, it means care enough about him enough to not want to hurt his feelings. I think a key to being a good lover is to help your partner feel comfortable. I honestly don't think I'm amazing in bed. I think what keeps the men coming back is that I make them feel like they are the amazing ones. Being aware of what can damage their performance (which is often directly related to their self-esteem) and doing your best to avoid it is important.

That makes total sense, communication is everything.

I think I'm going to go with the jade eggs because the jade stone cultivates energy and has a healing component to it (balances the yin yang energy).

 

[Enyo]

That makes total sense, communication is everything.

I think I'm going to go with the jade eggs because the jade stone cultivates energy and has a healing component to it (balances the yin yang energy).

Yeah, I believe in certain types of energy and healing, but none that are associated with stones and all that. The atheist/skeptic in me can only go so far with that type of stuff.

 

[FemmeFatale]

Enyo here's an great video on jade eggs that I found on YouTube

http://youtu.be/SwjLMy7YE5w

 

[robot.]

Rocky91 Here's the dress I was telling you about. So simple and sexy, I want both versions
link

Thought I would post it here in case others were interested

 

[robot.]

I have been wearing maxi dresses and I love it! I work on walking with sway in my hips. Like I am pushing my skirt with my hips when I walk.

Speaking of hair, how are you ladies wearing your hair? I know many of PS, but what feminine styles are you adopting to suit your feminine look? A relative told me today that my bun is boring and I need to change it up. I agree but I am obsessed with protecting my hair, lol.

Whenever I have braids, I always wear it in a high bun I love the look. I think there are ways to spice up your bun if you're tired of it.

I have a twa in a 'johnny bravo' style so I flat twist the top and just leave it be.

ETA: i take the flat twists out, i don't wear them

 

[RegaLady]

@Rocky91 Here's the dress I was telling you about. So simple and sexy, I want both versions
link

Thought I would post it here in case others were interested

So sexy!!

I am going out tonight and I cannot wait to wear a new dress. I think instead of rushing to get out, I will take my time and enjoy each moment of getting dolled up. I can't wait!

 

[Enyo]

I was over my current victim's apartment yesterday and did an accidental bun drop. I didn't realize my hair stick was lost () and felt my hair starting to slip out. Mr. Man noticed it and immediately pounced on it. I swear I need to turn this guy into a personal stylist. He cannot stop playing with my hair!!! He said it found it to be sexy to finally date a black girl who has hair that is naturally long and healthy.

So, um, if I ever bless him with the pleasure of my tongue then I have to make sure my hair is out.

 

[Rocky91]

Rocky91 Here's the dress I was telling you about. So simple and sexy, I want both versions
link

Thought I would post it here in case others were interested

Omg i love it!! *pulls out debit card*

I have a date in a few minutes and then I'm going out tonight. Just for the hell of it, I'm going to practice being as alluring and feminine as possible. I'll tell you guys how it goes.

Sent from my phone-typos to be expected

 

[LovelyLouboutin]

Does anyone have the PDF of Powerful and Feminine that they can send me? All I'm finding online is the workbook and not the actual book.

 

[RegaLady]

Ugh,

So I went out with my girls and dressed really cute. They even kept commenting on how sexy and made up I looked. But I felt so awkward. I was being looked at and I don't know why but it made me feel so uncomfortable. BUUUT, I tried to be in my body as best I could, like I walked very sexy( I love my legs, lol). I didn't want to switch or anything because I was afraid. I was afraid or bringing on any more unwanted attention . I didn't know it was possible. I have more work to do. Sigh.

I think the breakthrough comes when we don't feel bad or ashamed to be and act like women. I think the term is called, owning our sexuality.

 

[RegaLady]

I was over my current victim's apartment yesterday and did an accidental bun drop. I didn't realize my hair stick was lost () and felt my hair starting to slip out. Mr. Man noticed it and immediately pounced on it. I swear I need to turn this guy into a personal stylist. He cannot stop playing with my hair!!! He said it found it to be sexy to finally date a black girl who has hair that is naturally long and healthy.

So, um, if I ever bless him with the pleasure of my tongue then I have to make sure my hair is out.

Looking at your hair, I could see why

 

[FemmeFatale]

Does anyone have the PDF of Powerful and Feminine that they can send me? All I'm finding online is the workbook and not the actual book.

LovelyLouboutin
Sorry Hun, I don't think there was a PDF for the book available. I will say that it is absolutely worth the price! Get the book so that we can do some exercises together.

 

[LovelyLouboutin]

LovelyLouboutin
Sorry Hun, I don't think there was a PDF for the book available. I will say that it is absolutely worth the price! Get the book so that we can do some exercises together.

Ok! Heck I've already broken my no spending challenge this week. Why stop now lol

 

[Enyo]

Ugh,

So I went out with my girls and dressed really cute. They even kept commenting on how sexy and made up I looked. But I felt so awkward. I was being looked at and I don't know why but it made me feel so uncomfortable. BUUUT, I tried to be in my body as best I could, like I walked very sexy( I love my legs, lol). I didn't want to switch or anything because I was afraid. I was afraid or bringing on any more unwanted attention . I didn't know it was possible. I have more work to do. Sigh.

I think the breakthrough comes when we don't feel bad or ashamed to be and act like women. I think the term is called, owning our sexuality.

RegaLady Do you have a pre-party play list? Something to get you in the mood before you go out? Here are some examples from mine:

Queen of the Night - Whitney Houston
Animal - Janine and the Machine
When I Grow Up - Puzzycat Dolls
Hate on Me - Jill Scott
I Put a Spell on You - Natacha Atlas
Many Men - Lady G

 

[robot.]

Ugh,

So I went out with my girls and dressed really cute. They even kept commenting on how sexy and made up I looked. But I felt so awkward. I was being looked at and I don't know why but it made me feel so uncomfortable. BUUUT, I tried to be in my body as best I could, like I walked very sexy( I love my legs, lol). I didn't want to switch or anything because I was afraid. I was afraid or bringing on any more unwanted attention . I didn't know it was possible. I have more work to do. Sigh.

I think the breakthrough comes when we don't feel bad or ashamed to be and act like women. I think the term is called, owning our sexuality.

I'm naturally very quiet/introverted so I never paid attention to whether people looked at me or not. Now that I want them too, it feels good to know that they are But I can see how it would make you uncomfortable, especially if you didn't turn heads before

I love it. I feeling of being watched kind of turns me on Don't be afraid! It feels good. When I can feel someone's eyes on me it feels like...idk, like hot water is running through me. I know that's a really weird way to describe it but when I know someone is watching, I'll play in my hair, touch my neck and shoulders, maybe even glance over my shoulder just a little bit...it gets to be like a really fun game. You'll learn to enjoy it soon I especially like it when I'm not dressed sexy, but still look sexy Then I can be as sensual as I want while still feeling comfortable with myself

ETA: being watched really gives you a seductive, mysterious allure!! I've gotten it several times now but whenever I man says "I've been watching you," it makes me feel powerful for some reason. it's so sexy. whew. let me calm down. cuz even thinking about it...damn it just feels good

ETA2: I keep thinking of things to say This may sound odd but don't be afraid of unwanted attention, especially if you're in a safe environment with friends. A part of my attraction for others is that I never turn anyone away, even if I'm not interested, I never want to make anyone feel "unwanted." So long as they approach you respectfully and you don't feel threatened, I would relish in the attention. These people tend to make really good practice because you aren't personally invested so you can practice your charms more objectively. I am getting really good at 'graceful escapes' because of it

I think a big part of attraction is having a good time, no matter what. So long as you're safe and having fun, I try to make the best of everything that happens.

 

[NappyNelle]

I love, love, love this thread. I've been implementing many of the techniques in my daily life and I feel wonderful. I've always gotten male attention, but the quality of interaction is much more favorable now. I'm trying to impart some of these secrets to my best friend, but I'm not sure if she is ready yet. Slowly but surely, I will encourage her to wield her feminine power.

On another note, this e-course (lol) gave me the confidence to do what was best for me. For weeks I wrestled with the idea of leaving my job in order to focus on getting healthier. Now I have the time and energy it takes to nurture my chronically ill body; I am so much better to myself, my family, and my potential paramours now that I took that needed step back. Saying 'no' is so powerful. I wish I had the insight to say 'no' much earlier and more frequently in my life.

Now I plan on getting my place up to my standards. I've been neglecting my bedroom and living room for too long. I'm excited to get started with the research and ask for the help I will need.

Please keep posting anecdotes, recommending books, and encouraging others. Cheers to you lovelies!

 

[LovelyLouboutin]

[Hand Proselytizing]
I can't stress enough how important hands are to a woman's elegance!! I really think they are the most neglected part of the body sometimes. I have a few vids on YouTube and all you can see is my hands. You ladies would be surprised at how many people comment at how much they like my hands! Most of these people are verifiably women and girls, so it's not like some dirty man thinking about my magic fingers.

My office daughter/intern is very quiet but wants to learn to be more open and friendly like her mother. Her mom is one of those stunning women who loves people and people love her back, so stuff like that comes naturally to her. I told the intern it's possible to become more outgoing, but she's going to have to work harder. I told her when she meets a guy she thinking she might like and he asks her name, she should tell him and then proffer her hand elegantly. Most men will shake it and a very special few will actually kiss it. Either way, it gives him a reason to touch you in a way that's socially appropriate but is in, a subtle way, also a tad suggestive. I told her to watch for the men who don't seem to want to let go.

A man can spend time thinking about soft feminine hands. Just think about all the things we've done for our partners with our beautiful hands. I've had men straight up tell me that touching my hand once and feeling how soft and gentle they were was a total turn on. He also said he enjoyed same things like me gently rubbing the back of his hand when we talked with my fingertips, etc.

[/Hand Proselytizing]

Enyo
Teach me too! I'm an introvert and I would love to me more outgoing.

So we shouldn't offer our hand as a handshake but more like we are offering it for them to kiss?

 

[RegaLady]

@RegaLady Do you have a pre-party play list? Something to get you in the mood before you go out? Here are some examples from mine:

Queen of the Night - Whitney Houston
Animal - Janine and the Machine
When I Grow Up - Puzzycat Dolls
Hate on Me - Jill Scott
I Put a Spell on You - Natacha Atlas
Many Men - Lady G

OMG Enyo!

I totally forgot about the power of music! That is what I needed. Some of my girls needed a little buzz before going out, but I don't care to drink so I need something to help me relax. Music is my thing! Thank you for this suggestion. I will try it next time

 

[RegaLady]

I'm naturally very quiet/introverted so I never paid attention to whether people looked at me or not. Now that I want them too, it feels good to know that they are But I can see how it would make you uncomfortable, especially if you didn't turn heads before

I love it. I feeling of being watched kind of turns me on Don't be afraid! It feels good. When I can feel someone's eyes on me it feels like...idk, like hot water is running through me. I know that's a really weird way to describe it but when I know someone is watching, I'll play in my hair, touch my neck and shoulders, maybe even glance over my shoulder just a little bit...it gets to be like a really fun game. You'll learn to enjoy it soon I especially like it when I'm not dressed sexy, but still look sexy Then I can be as sensual as I want while still feeling comfortable with myself

ETA: being watched really gives you a seductive, mysterious allure!! I've gotten it several times now but whenever I man says "I've been watching you," it makes me feel powerful for some reason. it's so sexy. whew. let me calm down. cuz even thinking about it...damn it just feels good

ETA2: I keep thinking of things to say This may sound odd but don't be afraid of unwanted attention, especially if you're in a safe environment with friends. A part of my attraction for others is that I never turn anyone away, even if I'm not interested, I never want to make anyone feel "unwanted." So long as they approach you respectfully and you don't feel threatened, I would relish in the attention. These people tend to make really good practice because you aren't personally invested so you can practice your charms more objectively. I am getting really good at 'graceful escapes' because of it

I think a big part of attraction is having a good time, no matter what. So long as you're safe and having fun, I try to make the best of everything that happens.

OMG, I need to think and feel like you

I think I am in conflict, because being a married woman puts a cap on things like that. At least, that is what I feel. If I were single, I probably would be more comfortable with this. But to me, the only eyes I should be having are from Dh so I have always subconsiously shyed away from being sexy in public even though men have approached me.

I was reading in a book(can't remember which one, because we have been reading so much,lol) that we are social beings and it is feminine to be receptive to things like attention. Like regardless of marital status, every lady wants to be seen and heard and admired. This is very true for me. But I guess I feel if I am not seeking a relationship or anything, why am all doing alla this? But then I have to remember, I am doing it for myself and things like compliments and the like are just extra bonuses that comes with tapping into that source

Overall, I looked great, walked great, and had alot of fun! I just need to relax. But you brought up some very great pointers robot. Alot for me to ponder upon.

 

[robot.]

Okay, see, that's different. I am single as a dollar bill so I love attention I can see why you might be uncomfortable with it.

 

[LovelyLouboutin]

I'm trying to get back into hair and make-up. I'm also mentally making lesson plans for my intern. Now that her confidence is getting up there, I'll have to take her out so we can practice harnessing her natural presence.

Enyo you're located in MD?! I can use a mentor also. Lol. I'm in MD as well.

 

[SelahOco]

My friend just came back from India and she took a few pictures as she was leaving. This picture just struck me so...

So feminine and lovely ... I wasn't sure where else to share this. I thought you ladies would appreciate what I see in them.

 

[TracyNicole]

@Enyo you're located in MD?! I can use a mentor also. Lol. I'm in MD as well.

We still need to have our meetup. I will be on bedrest so I can't come out to the convention next week with ladysaraii. When is the latest we can plan something Enyo?

 

[ladysaraii]

Awww I'm sad that I'll miss you! Is anyone else coming?

 

[LovelyLouboutin]

We still need to have our meetup. I will be on bedrest so I can't come out to the convention next week with ladysaraii. When is the latest we can plan something Enyo?

Is there a convention next week?! (I'm only on page 22 of the thread lol. I'm working my way through).

Bedrest?! I hope you're ok.

 

[ladysaraii]

It's the Bellydancers of Color Expo

 

[fluffyforever]

I love this thread! So, I started reading Sex Secrets today and am half way through. I actually went to this cute sex boutique this afternoon and picked up some toys and Ben wa balls (I got the Ami set by Je Joue). From the moment I left the house, I practiced walking with my lower body leading the way and was conscious of my hands and arms. I was really in my body and enjoying it. Stopped at Starbucks, got my free bday drink, and I could feel people watching. Some older men were definitely staring in front of their wives. Even though I was smiling nonstop, I think some women gave me nasty looks. Went to the grocery store, and I swear I this lady was scowling while looking me in the eye. It freaked me out. I got home and was hollered at by an eight year old neighbor who proceeded to make a humping gesture. This boy had never done anything but say hi and wave the whole year I've lived here. I don't know what I'm doing wrong, but these are not the vibes I'm going for

 

[FemmeFatale]

It's the Bellydancers of Color Expo

OMG Where?! How the heck did I miss this?

 

[Enyo]

So we shouldn't offer our hand as a handshake but more like we are offering it for them to kiss?

Yes, exactly! And make sure you keep your expression light and moderately expectant.