Sense and Sensuality ("Loving" Spinny)

I looooooove when I can be free and be sensual. For the most part, I think I have a natural sensuality/sexual energy, but I alot of times consciously keep it restricted, mostly b/c I don't always like the attention. But it's a good feeling when I can let it go. I think that's why I have a tomboyish edge to me cause it keeps a balance that I'm comfortable with. I want to use this thread to help me be more comfortable with the attention lol. For instance, when I'm walking at work, I tend to walk pretty fast, mostly b/c I'm not tryna have somebody stop me with some convo. But there are moments when I do just chill out and allow myself to be more open. I'd like to do more of that. So I guess I'll purposely today make a conscious effort to relax in my sensuality w/o holding it back and be more open. (The thing is I come off flirty when I do that lol; to men and women actually; but I'll just see what's up)
 
Enyo that makes a lot of sense. My guy mentioned bathing me and giving me a back rub and I giggled and told him to stop being messy..deep down inside I was gushing. I don't know how much longer ill be able to hold out but at the same time I'm enjoying it.
 
FemmeFatale said:
@Enyo that makes a lot of sense. My guy mentioned bathing me and giving me a back rub and I giggled and told him to stop being messy..deep down inside I was gushing. I don't know how much longer ill be able to hold out but at the same time I'm enjoying it.
Click to expand...

FemmeFatale Eventually, you can let him do that if you want. But you should initiate it. The more intimate things are, the more important it is to catch him off guard! Otherwise, it gives him the impression that he can control you with his suggestions. You want to make it seem like you're granting a wish rather than succumbing to passion. He should feel like a lucky man - not like a victor.

Sometimes it's OK to grant a small request. Recently, I let Mr. Man see me with my hair out because he implied that he was really curious. I huffed and puffed partially for show and partially because I truly don't like having my hair out in front of people. He got really excited watching me pull out my famous hair stick, shaking my head, and trying to smooth it down as much as I could. Luckily, my hair was stretched instead of super shrunk. He played in it and then tugged it a little which made us both laugh. I asked him if he was weave checking me, though I think it was more of a sexual move. After about 30 seconds, he got swatted away and I put it back up. He kept touching the bun though, which was fine. Men often like long/big hair. Even though I do not have a relaxer, I'm sure he thought about seeing me nude with all my hair out in bed.

I feel like I need to stop and say that's a benefit of having a somewhat fluid idea sexuality. I wouldn't say that I'm bisexual, I do tend to be able to think as if I were. Does that make sense?? Basically, I can look at a woman in a sexual manor without really being sexually aroused. For instance, I'm amazed at my interns mastery of eating candy canes. :lol:

I keep some in the locker at my desk and sometimes we eat them and talk about her day. I don't think she has any idea how sensual she looks. She props her elbow up on the arm of the chair and uses the hand on that arm to play in her hair and rub her scalp softly. Having her head touched makes her sleepy, so sometimes she sighs contently while twirling the candy cane absentmindedly. Even when she's half asleep she balances the use of her lips with the display of her tongue perfectly. When we talk and she laughs, she don't take the candy out of her mouth. She she presses it against her tongue which is quite sexy. Sometimes she'll be sucking away and then will randomly take out the candy and look it as if she's contemplating how good it is.

I love watching this. I find it to be almost hypnotizing just like a man would, but I'm not sexually aroused by it. Something about seeing her propped up, hands playing in her very pretty colored hair, sighing, smiling, and occasionally laughing makes me forget to eat my damn candy. I try my best to use the more masculine side of my mind. It's amazing how differently you can see things.
 
itismehmmkay said:
I looooooove when I can be free and be sensual. For the most part, I think I have a natural sensuality/sexual energy, but I alot of times consciously keep it restricted, mostly b/c I don't always like the attention. But it's a good feeling when I can let it go. I think that's why I have a tomboyish edge to me cause it keeps a balance that I'm comfortable with. I want to use this thread to help me be more comfortable with the attention lol. For instance, when I'm walking at work, I tend to walk pretty fast, mostly b/c I'm not tryna have somebody stop me with some convo. But there are moments when I do just chill out and allow myself to be more open. I'd like to do more of that. So I guess I'll purposely today make a conscious effort to relax in my sensuality w/o holding it back and be more open. (The thing is I come off flirty when I do
that lol; to men and women actually; but I'll just see what's up)
Click to expand...

I can so relate to this. Interesting enough, I got my hair done and decided to free instead of uptight. These couple of days, I walked with pleasure, observed my sorroundings, smiled at people while looking them in the eye( you can tell I was alot more confident then I have ever been in a while). Let me tell ya, I am a married woman and this feeling had a great affect on men and women. I use to worry about shooting down attention, but now I enjoy it:look:. I loved the stares, the glances, the smiles, the small talk, etc. I am not looking for anything in particular, but just to enjoy myself being enjoyed. If not for anything else, the sheer pleasure of it is worth it.
 
Enyo said:
@FemmeFatale Eventually, you can let him do that if you want. But you should initiate it. The more intimate things are, the more important it is to catch him off guard! Otherwise, it gives him the impression that he can control you with his suggestions. You want to make it seem like you're granting a wish rather than succumbing to passion. He should feel like a lucky man - not like a victor.

Sometimes it's OK to grant a small request. Recently, I let Mr. Man see me with my hair out because he implied that he was really curious. I huffed and puffed partially for show and partially because I truly don't like having my hair out in front of people. He got really excited watching me pull out my famous hair stick, shaking my head, and trying to smooth it down as much as I could. Luckily, my hair was stretched instead of super shrunk. He played in it and then tugged it a little which made us both laugh. I asked him if he was weave checking me, though I think it was more of a sexual move. After about 30 seconds, he got swatted away and I put it back up. He kept touching the bun though, which was fine. Men often like long/big hair. Even though I do not have a relaxer, I'm sure he thought about seeing me nude with all my hair out in bed.

I feel like I need to stop and say that's a benefit of having a somewhat fluid idea sexuality. I wouldn't say that I'm bisexual, I do tend to be able to think as if I were. Does that make sense?? Basically, I can look at a woman in a sexual manor without really being sexually aroused. For instance, I'm amazed at my interns mastery of eating candy canes. :lol:

I keep some in the locker at my desk and sometimes we eat them and talk about her day. I don't think she has any idea how sensual she looks. She props her elbow up on the arm of the chair and uses the hand on that arm to play in her hair and rub her scalp softly. Having her head touched makes her sleepy, so sometimes she sighs contently while twirling the candy cane absentmindedly. Even when she's half asleep she balances the use of her lips with the display of her tongue perfectly. When we talk and she laughs, she don't take the candy out of her mouth. She she presses it against her tongue which is quite sexy. Sometimes she'll be sucking away and then will randomly take out the candy and look it as if she's contemplating how good it is.

I love watching this. I find it to be almost hypnotizing just like a man would, but I'm not sexually aroused by it. Something about seeing her propped up, hands playing in her very pretty colored hair, sighing, smiling, and occasionally laughing makes me forget to eat my damn candy. I try my best to use the more masculine side of my mind. It's amazing how differently you can see things.
Click to expand...

YASSSS! From time to time I look at some women through the eyes of a man (without the sexual arousal of course). And it is VERY amazing what one is able to see. You notice things that you would have normally been oblivious to.

This reminds me of friend of a relative of mine has who is very good at attracting men(but not keeping them:look:) Anyway we all were out to dinner and I watched her. Like I observed everything about her. I finally saw what most men could see in her. Her gestures and everything she did was flirtatious and sensual. I mean very little things, right down to the timing. I was amazed. Not to mention, there were no men around, so she seemed to just flirt on a subconsious level.
 
RegaLady said:
YASSSS! From time to time I look at some women through the eyes of a man (without the sexual arousal of course). And it is VERY amazing what one is able to see. You notice things that you would have normally been oblivious to.

This reminds me of friend of a relative of mine has who is very good at attracting men(but not keeping them:look:) Anyway we all were out to dinner and I watched her. Like I observed everything about her. I finally saw what most men could see in her. Her gestures and everything she did was flirtatious and sensual. I mean very little things, right down to the timing. I was amazed. Not to mention, there were no men around, so she seemed to just flirt on a subconsious level.
Click to expand...

A true sensualist doesn't perform for men. Sensuality flows through her like blood. My intern is the same way. She's a combination of sweetness and sex on her own. It doesn't matter that she works in a 95% female office. I've seen her with men (including her boyfriend) and she acts the exact same way with them than she does with us women. It's innate. I admire it.
 
Oh dear. That was a little scary to watch. I thought she was going to rip that thing to shreds!!

Sent from my messy iPhone
 
Wow you ladies have been busy, busy bees. Enyo thank you for sharing. It sounds like I sure have a ton of work to do. This is all so exciting.
Someone asked about the meetup plan. I believe we were debating lunch during the expo but didn't pick a time/date/place.
 
When I watch Girlfriends ofcourse Lynn is the free spirited, sexual experimenter on the show however Maya always stood out to me as we'll as being very sexual. I noticed that she always wore some form of flirty lingerie at night. Even with her son in the house. She just seemed to naturally keep it sexy.

I find myself saving my sexy lingerie for special occasions and being more comfy and cute on a regular basis. I usually wear maxi night gowns, short romper lounge nightwear or silk pajamas but I am thinking about changing it up and sleeping in sexy lingerie most of the time.

Do you think sleeping in lingerie will increase your overall sexual energy for anyone, single, dating or married?
 
MsWowFactor said:
When I watch Girlfriends ofcourse Lynn is the free spirited, sexual experimenter on the show however Maya always stood out to me as we'll as being very sexual. I noticed that she always wore some form of flirty lingerie at night. Even with her son in the house. She just seemed to naturally keep it sexy.

I find myself saving my sexy lingerie for special occasions and being more comfy and cute on a regular basis. I usually wear maxi night gowns, short romper lounge nightwear or silk pajamas but I am thinking about changing it up and sleeping in sexy lingerie most of the time.

Do you think sleeping in lingerie will increase your overall sexual energy for anyone, single, dating or married?
Click to expand...

For me it does not increase my sexual side, but wearing silks delight the senses for both me and my partner.

Sent from my messy iPhone
 
MsWowFactor said:
When I watch Girlfriends ofcourse Lynn is the free spirited, sexual experimenter on the show however Maya always stood out to me as we'll as being very sexual. I noticed that she always wore some form of flirty lingerie at night. Even with her son in the house. She just seemed to naturally keep it sexy.

I find myself saving my sexy lingerie for special occasions and being more comfy and cute on a regular basis. I usually wear maxi night gowns, short romper lounge nightwear or silk pajamas but I am thinking about changing it up and sleeping in sexy lingerie most of the time.

Do you think sleeping in lingerie will increase your overall sexual energy for anyone, single, dating or married?
Click to expand...

It can. It can help you get into that "role".

I will also say anything that increases your energy for you is what you need to do,IMO. Someone else can chime in. I say this because we sometimes do what should make us feel sexy, but it doesn't work out right or it looks/feels contrived. But if we wear and do what brings sexy out to us, then that energy will flow. What will work for one may not work for another.
 
So I have been paying more attention to my walk, the way I sit and eye seduction. Yesterday DH commented on how seductively walked to the car. I pay more attention to my mannerisms as well.

Today I went to starbucks and decided to test my "eye seduction" technique on one of the employees. I didn't think it worked but was pleasantly surprised when he came to the window to make conversation with me. I have been getting a lot more male attention than usual.
 
I can relate to the ladies below. I've been stalking this thread for a long time and I realized there is nothing wrong with me being sexy. I'm a sexual creature and I need to stop fighting it.

What I USE to do was not dress for my body type, play down my looks, don't bother wearing makeup, hardly combing my hair and walk fast and just do things that wasn't ME.

So the other day, I took some time with my appearance and was the feminine me. I went to visit my friend at her job and her jerk of a co-worker wanted to talk to me. I was like SCORE!!!!

I want the attention, vain I know, but why not!

RegaLady said:
I can so relate to this. Interesting enough, I got my hair done and decided to free instead of uptight. These couple of days, I walked with pleasure, observed my sorroundings, smiled at people while looking them in the eye( you can tell I was alot more confident then I have ever been in a while). Let me tell ya, I am a married woman and this feeling had a great affect on men and women. I use to worry about shooting down attention, but now I enjoy it:look:. I loved the stares, the glances, the smiles, the small talk, etc. I am not looking for anything in particular, but just to enjoy myself being enjoyed. If not for anything else, the sheer pleasure of it is worth it.
Click to expand...

itismehmmkay said:
I looooooove when I can be free and be sensual. For the most part, I think I have a natural sensuality/sexual energy, but I alot of times consciously keep it restricted, mostly b/c I don't always like the attention. But it's a good feeling when I can let it go. I think that's why I have a tomboyish edge to me cause it keeps a balance that I'm comfortable with. I want to use this thread to help me be more comfortable with the attention lol. For instance, when I'm walking at work, I tend to walk pretty fast, mostly b/c I'm not tryna have somebody stop me with some convo. But there are moments when I do just chill out and allow myself to be more open. I'd like to do more of that. So I guess I'll purposely today make a conscious effort to relax in my sensuality w/o holding it back and be more open. (The thing is I come off flirty when I do that lol; to men and women actually; but I'll just see what's up)
Click to expand...
 
Can someone post or pm me info about the wellness expo? I must've missed a post because I'm not certain of all the details. Thanks.
 
I've been lurking all through this thread. :yep:

I've changed up my fitness routine completely and am trying to mix in more "sensual" arts with running and tennis. So I've been taking ballet and pole dancing classes weekly and am loving it.

I'm reading up on how to teach what I want... I went through a firestorm of reading a lot of annoying or trite (Mama Gena's, Sex Secrets of An American Geisha, Brazilian Sexy blah blah blah). Couldn't really get down with them. I am however really enjoying Slow Sex (all about Orgasmic Meditation).
 
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Syrah said:
I've been lurking all through this thread. :yep:

I've changed up my fitness routine completely and am trying to mix in more "sensual" arts with running and tennis. So I've been taking ballet and pole dancing classes weekly and am loving it.

I'm reading up on how to teach what I want... I went through a firestorm of reading a lot of annoying or trite (Mama Gena's, Sex Secrets of An American Geisha, Brazilian Sexy blah blah blah). Couldn't really get down with them. I am however really enjoying Slow Sex (all about Orgasmic Meditation).
Click to expand...

@Syrah So, are you looking to enhance your sexual skills, pleasure, or both? :)
 
FemmeFatale said:
@Enyo I know you didn't ask me but I'm looking for both, lol.
Click to expand...

@FemmeFatale LOL! I would say focus on your pleasure first. You can learn to pleasure a man without knowing how to accept it, but that's not the way to go. Do you know what turns you on? If so, do you put it into play or are you too shy to try?
 
Enyo said:
@FemmeFatale LOL! I would say focus on your pleasure first. You can learn to pleasure a man without knowing how to accept it, but that's not the way to go. Do you know what turns you on? If so, do you put it into play or are you too shy to try?
Click to expand...

Enyo Oh I'm definitely all about pleasing myself and putting my happiness first. It's the only way we both can be happy, lol.

I do know what turns me on and it's quite devilish, lol. I must say that I enjoy reading your posts, you seem to draw out all these amazing ideas from my head, lol.

OT: your profile pic of the virgin mary makes me :giggle:
 
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Enyo said:
@Syrah So, are you looking to enhance your sexual skills, pleasure, or both? :)
Click to expand...
Without going into too much detail - I'm with you on handling business before going out with someone you're sexuality attracted to.

To answer your question - I'm actually looking to enhance my abilities to seek what it is I want. To direct. To guide. To positively reinforce. And to find new ways of getting what it is that I want. In that sense, I would say that the goal is then to enhance my pleasure through a partner.

I think there are two ways to go about it:
- You can either be a master at helping a man achieve his satisfaction (in a variety of forms) OR
- You can become a master at getting him to help you achieve your satisfaction

I am choosing the latter, consciously. Over the past few years I've realized I'm a pretty selfish person. I see this is a way of learning how to seek mutual gratification through my selfish pursuits, if that makes any sense. He wins because I win. :look:
 
FemmeFatale said:
OT: your profile pic of the virgin mary makes me :giggle:
Click to expand...

Girl, dat ain't no Mary. That's Holy Josephine! My Holy Family consists of Josephine Baker, Johnny Depp, and Russel Wong. I keeps it real in dis thread! :yep:

Syrah said:
To answer your question - I'm actually looking to enhance my abilities to seek what it is I want. To direct. To guide. To positively reinforce. And to find new ways of getting what it is that I want. In that sense, I would say that the goal is then to enhance my pleasure through a partner.

I think there are two ways to go about it:
- You can either be a master at helping a man achieve his satisfaction (in a variety of forms) OR
- You can become a master at getting him to help you achieve your satisfaction

I am choosing the latter, consciously. Over the past few years I've realized I'm a pretty selfish person. I see this is a way of learning how to seek mutual gratification through my selfish pursuits, if that makes any sense. He wins because I win. :look:
Click to expand...

Or you can master both! Start with one as you are doing, but then go to the other. That way, you can use them interchangeably when needed.
 
I was on the Railroad last night leaving the Benjamin Hotel and I was waiting for my train I decided to reread some really good highlighted points in Mama Gena's book. Wouldn't you know it but a man was standing by me and asked me what I was reading and I handed him the book. His face lit up like a beet. LOL! I made a new friend on the ride home. We discussed our neighborhood, Castro, Haiti, reality shows, reading, relationships and anything else you could pack into a 25 minute ride. It was nice. I need to go to the city more often. :D
 
@Lucie I love meeting random men and having a good conversation with them. I often meet them on the train too!!

On another note, I had to teach my intern about KY Jelly today. I dunno how kids these days seem to see sex everywhere and still don't know anything about it. Poor thing was in pain. :nono: It was a good convo, though. I took her to the gym shower/bathroom to work on her hair because the mirrors are massive and most people abandon it after 5. She's been trying to wear it naturally, so we are working on her skills since she's normally a flat iron type of girl. I ended up brushing out her hair for her (she almost fell asleep) after we were done working with her curls. It was very nice. Felt like I had a daughter. :)
 
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Enyo said:
@Lucie I love meeting random men and having a good conversation with them. I often meet them on the train too!!

On another note, I had to teach my intern about KY Jelly today. I dunno how kids these days seem to see sex everywhere and still don't know anything about it. Poor thing was in pain. :nono: It was a good convo, though. I took her to the gym shower/bathroom to work on her hair because the mirrors are massive and most people abandon it after 5. She's been trying to wear it naturally, so we are working on her skills since she's normally a flat iron type of girl. I ended up brushing out her hair for her (she almost fell asleep) after we were done working with her curls. It was very nice. Felt like I had a daughter. :)
Click to expand...
:lol: Where the heck do you work?
 
:wave:Hey Ladies

The last two months were very difficult for me, but I am getting out of that phase.
This month will be very busy. I am excited because it will be a turning point for me.
I bought Mama Gena and will begin reading it soon.
I hope all of you are doing well!
 
Soooo :look: :look: :look: :look: This whole post is going to sound like I'm bragging but I swear it's all real life

I have my entire campus enchanted. :blush: The mama gena video on flirting was what flipped the switch for me. Me and my feminine energy has been teeming lately! Being in my body feels so electric and delicious and I can tell others are picking up on it

Two people have told me I look like halle berry in a week (new haircut)
An emergency vehicle honked at me as I was walking (this may have been disrespectful but they were cute and smiled :look: )
Went to a bar and free drinks literally followed me wherever I went. That one was real nice...
"You're glowing" is a compliment I hear often now
Two male friends followed me around the grocery store and refused to let me carry anything

I even stopped traffic today :look: I mean the guy knew me but he literally hit is brakes and backed up. He demanded to know when we were going out again

I feel like I'm still trying to finesse this into something more concrete but I am on my way :grin:
 
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