Cut Buddy

I love how you balance out being a hater and a friend barbs lol.


Like I said above I think there a a lid for every pot but sometimes he might be an import groom from another culture.
 
Mortons said:
I love how you balance out being a hater and a friend barbs lol.


Like I said above I think there a a lid for every pot but sometimes he might be an import groom from another culture.
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lol

I feel bad.

sometimes.:look:

I'm in trouble about a topic similar to this. I have to fix. It ain't lookin good. Pray for me. She's not a heaux but she's mad. I think I effed up. We might need to talk. All these women and their emotions. :nono:


but yea so about this free sex idea........
 
Well the way I know it around here, the casual sexers are the ones with trouble navigating very simple dating scenarios, like should I call him, it's been x amount of hrs since I've text him, What does this text mean? Do you think he's interested? He said let's hang out, what does that mean?..I'm sort of like the Charlotte/Patti S in my group (less of a worry wort, very confident, very strategic) and I am constantly asked to decode things..whereas my friends are lighthearted and very casual about sex and are also completely brain dead when it comes to men and cultivating relationships. It's sad because these are gorgeous, fun, educated women.

In NYC there are a lot of late 20s/ early 30s people who panic over simple things, they have intimacy and communication issues and they literally do not know how to date. They don't know the art of conversation, how to charm or stroke an ego, and the confidence and know how is just not there.
 
FemmeFatale said:
Well the way I know it around here, the casual sexers are the ones with trouble navigating very simple dating scenarios, like should I call him, it's been x amount of hrs since I've text him, What does this text mean? Do you think he's interested? He said let's hang out, what does that mean?..I'm sort of like the Charlotte/Patti S in my group (less of a worry wort, very confident, very strategic) and I am constantly asked to decode things..whereas my friends are lighthearted and very casual about sex and are also completely brain dead when it comes to men and cultivating relationships. It's sad because these are gorgeous, fun, educated women.

In NYC there are a lot of late 20s/ early 30s people who panic over simple things, they have intimacy and communication issues and they literally do not know how to date. They don't know the art of conversation, how to charm or stroke an ego, and the confidence and know how is just not there.
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Can we mix Charlotte and Miranda?

That's me.:look:

But Samantha will always be Samantha. Carrie will always be Carrie. Those are the two most consistent characters for a reason.....
 
Southernbella. said:
Miranda had a cut buddy though.
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That's why I said can we mix them?

I'll do a one night stand, that no one ever here's or sees and I forget about. Not a cut buddy or fwb. I'm snarky like Miranda but if we could mix her with Charlotte's holier than thou, that'd be me. :grin:

Charlotte and Miranda are the most inconsistent characters. I'm more likely to be an unfaithful wife than a single heaux.
 
That is the fault of many mothers not casual sex. Mine wasn't open about dating or love, so I became who I am today at about 25. Ummm a year ago :look:

not knowing how to navigate the opposite sex is a true issue but most women don't know themselves to be able to know someone else. If you don't know what you want out of a particular man you can't navigate it and lead the horse to the water so to speak so... You already lost the war there. Many women feel what they think they should feel not what they would naturally feel in a scenario.
 
barbiesocialite said:
Can we mix Charlotte and Miranda? That's me.:look: But Samantha will always be Samantha. Carrie will always be Carrie. Those are the two most consistent characters for a reason.....
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:lol: hmmm I can see it Charlotte/Miranda mix for you.

A lot of women think they're Samantha but they're more like senseless Carrie :roadrunner:

Samantha was confident in who she was and what she wanted.
 
barbiesocialite said:
That's why I said can we mix them?

I'll do a one night stand, that no one ever here's or sees and I forget about. Not a cut buddy or fwb. I'm snarky like Miranda but if we could mix her with Charlotte's holier than thou, that'd be me. :grin:

Charlotte and Miranda are the most inconsistent characters. I'm more likely to be an unfaithful wife than a single heaux.
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Do you think one night stands ruin the game for other women in the same way cut buddies do? I know you mentioned the difference for you but do you believe men see them differently?
 
Mortons said:
That is the fault of many mothers not casual sex. Mine wasn't open about dating or love, so I became who I am today at about 25. Ummm a year ago :look:

not knowing how to navigate the opposite sex is a true issue but most women don't know themselves to be able to know someone else. If you don't know what you want out of a particular man you can't navigate it and lead the horse to the water so to speak so... You already lost the war there. Many women feel what they think they should feel not what they would naturally feel in a scenario.
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But check it.....

many of these mothers were and are heauxs! If they weren't heauxs they weren't long terms wives committed to family and marriage. And this, my dear, is what they showed and taught their children.

It def started early with my mom's generation (she's 51). I hate her friends. I told her that ever since she started hanging out with the single mothers and divorced women she's become he worst mother, friend, woman, person and wife ever. It's awful. I would never want to be like that as a woman. I dont like these loose women. And my mother isnt one but I've seen the influence of such women on her and on friends. My relatives with a bunch of single loose slutty friends have the most difficult time in relationships even though they may not be sluts themselves. It's a bad look. A s a result, I dont surround myself with loose women. And do not condone my daughter, my relatives or friends being loose women.
 
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God_Favor said:
Was this meant to be a light hearted thread geared towards women who actually enjoy sex? Why turn it into the typical black baby momma stats , and psychological reasons a women may think she has sexual needs like man does lol...
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Why can't the conversation naturally evolve and why are we placing limits on what it can be? Some people are yay, others are nay and everything in between. That's what makes a conversation interesting and informative. You can enjoy sex and still think about the implications of it. Is light-hearted code for co-sign, agree and promote? :look:
 
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barbiesocialite said:
But check it..... many of these mothers were and are heauxs! If they weren't heauxs they weren't long terms wives committed to family and marriage. And this, my dear, is what they showed and taught their children. It def started early with my mom's generation (she's 51). I hate her friends. I told her that ever since she started hanging out with the single mothers and divorced women she's become he worst mother, friend, woman, person and wife ever. It's awful. I would never want to be like that as a woman. I dont like these loose women. And my mother isnt one but I've seen the influence of such women on her and on friends. It's a bad look. A s a result, I dont surround myself with loose women. And do not condone my daughter, my relatives or friends being loose women.
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Whether the mother is a ho or a Virgin Mary she should've passed down her knowledge on men, love, and happiness to her children. Even if all she knew is that men lie because she was lied to, she should have a frank talk with her kids. My great grandma lied a lot about her husband. My grandma refused to talk about her 6-7 marriages much of the time. That's decades and decades of honesty and frankness lost

I remember watching some show about Paris Hilton talking to my mom and she was giving paris advice on how she caught her wealthy dad and and was so frank and candid. Candid talks are the way to raise a girl than this fairytale bs.
 
barbiesocialite said:
But check it..... many of these mothers were and are heauxs! If they weren't heauxs they weren't long terms wives committed to family and marriage. And this, my dear, is what they showed and taught their children. It def started early with my mom's generation (she's 51). I hate her friends. I told her that ever since she started hanging out with the single mothers and divorced women she's become he worst mother, friend, woman, person and wife ever. It's awful. I would never want to be like that as a woman. I dont like these loose women. And my mother isnt one but I've seen the influence of such women on her and on friends. My relatives with a bunch of single loose slutty friends have the most difficult in relationships even though they may not be sluts themselves. It's a bad look. A s a result, I dont surround myself with loose women. And do not condone my daughter, my relatives or friends being loose women.
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My God this is true.
 
Mortons said:
Whether the mother is a ho or a Virgin Mary she should've passed down her knowledge on men, love, and happiness to her children. Even if all she knew is that men lie because she was lied to, she should have a frank talk with her kids. My great grandma lied a lot about her husband. My grandma refused to talk about her 6-7 marriages much of the time. That's decades and decades of honesty and frankness lost

I remember watching some show about Paris Hilton talking to my mom and she was giving paris advice on how she caught her wealthy dad and and was so frank and candid. Candid talks are the way to raise a girl than this fairytale bs.
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I agree telling girls to be sluts is fairytale bs just like giving girls the illusion to be virgins is fairy taie bs.
 
Southernbella. said:
But one of the main complaints in the thread is that men don't get married because they can get sex without it. Does it matter to them whether they know the person or not?
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yes.

Because the argument is about free sex with no strings attached.

REAL free sex means all strings are cut. If you are calling someone to come hit it then there are clearly strings because you're still tied.

Let's call a spade a spade here.

Women want these fakearse boyfriends and want all the sex they can handle but if you really want to be free and do you boo then you taste the variety and dgaf about keeping or holding ties to a past sex experience. you advance and search for new ones.
 
Southernbella. said:
Do you think one night stands ruin the game for other women in the same way cut buddies do? I know you mentioned the difference for you but do you believe men see them differently?
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One night stands are way worse than fwb/cut buddy situations IMO - in fact I think women have cut buddies so they don't have to have one nights stands which are dangerous and where I imagine the chances of even getting sexually satisfied are low unless one just gets off on sex with strangers.
 
SuchMagnificance said:
Just about

Sent from my SM-G900P using LHCF
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Why? You are a woman someone will want to marry. To find him, change direction. It would be nice to be able to marry someone my age and of my own specific culture but I learned quickly that very narrow idea and group wouldn't get me married or wealthy. Change directions and I have more long term options.

Go opposite before going nuclear is my particular though process.
 
Naveah2050 said:
Why is feminism such a bad word on this forum?! If feminism espouses choice what's wrong with other women having the choice to follow their own desires and not be penalized for it?!

If we take away feminism many of the things most of you are tied to you would not have - yes we all want it all - just like I am sure all of us want to be paid evaluated and paid equally at work and still have our significant others foot the bulk of the bill and still take the lead at home.

If you don't believe in cut buddies that's fine but don't get upset if the women who are out there slutting it up are still getting married and having that perfect life while you who played the good girl game is single with no prospects - which is what I think most of this boils down to - being well behaved doesn't mean society will reward you with what you think you deserve - as long as your happy with your choices you will still be winning - the proliferation of sex only relationship doesn't mean people no longer value emotional relationships or finding the one, most people probably just have a broader definition of the spectrum that relationships can span.
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This reminds me of Gabrielle Union on Mary Jane when she asked what does she get for being a good girl...
 
If we're going to talk about sluts, let's be honest about sluts.

There's a certain type that's likely to get married more than others.

White sluts marry-easiliy.

Black sluts that marry the easiest usually come from married households.(that I know, including the ones on this board).

The average black American woman comes from a single mother household. is the black single slut raised by a single mother likely to get married as the others?

Virginity doesnt work. Neither doesn heauxdom.

Middle line would likely be the most effective for most black women. Get your couple unspoken one night stands, demand every other man be a committed SO and the final your husband....
 
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shortycocoa said:
This reminds me of Gabrielle Union on Mary Jane when she asked what does she get for being a good girl...
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Mary Jane is the prime example of the educated, pretty girl that is very dense when it comes to men. Plus she's insufferable, annoying and high strung. Watch her fall for the f buddy, smh.
 
It's very telling when society is more open to accepting hook-up culture than "hooker" culture (as they call it). We will quickly defend a woman's right to have multiple, short-term flings with no payoff aside from a short-lived orgasm, but we'll still chastise women who demand payment of some type in exchange for sex. Where is this "women enjoy sex, too!" argument when it comes to gold-diggers and sugar babies? Once a woman is giving it up for vacations, shopping sprees, monthly stipends, and dinners, suddenly she doesn't enjoy sex and sex is only for the man's pleasure. She's being used. She's unhappy and empty inside. But if she gives it up to Marco for free, she's a modern, liberated woman.

Back in the day I had cut buddies. It was an enjoyable experience physically but at the end of the day, I couldn't count on any of those men for anything but an orgasm. I didn't feel used, but I did feel like I surrendered my power too quickly. Sex is great, sex is wonderful, sex is enjoyable, and sex is power for a woman. It's why selling the fantasy of sex has always been more lucrative than engaging in the act. The same women gyrating on stage, singing about getting cherries turned out, anacondas, and strip clubs and dollar bills probably have fewer sex partners than the average woman. One in particular has been sleeping with the same man for over a decade.

Casual sex for women might be liberating, but it isn't always smart. I believe in women embracing their sexuality but there are better ways to do it. These days I only have sex within some type of relationship where I have the upper hand emotionally, mentally, and physically. If I give you access to my body, I'm going to expect for you to come to my rescue when I need something. I need mental stimulation, adventure, and security. Men these days think offering some D is enough. Not for me. Without those other things, it's pretty unremarkable.
 
ArcticFemme said:
It's very telling when society is more open to accepting hook-up culture than "hooker" culture (as they call it). We will quickly defend a woman's right to have multiple, short-term flings with no payoff aside from a short-lived orgasm, but we'll still chastise women who demand payment of some type in exchange for sex. Where is this "women enjoy sex, too!" argument when it comes to gold-diggers and sugar babies? Once a woman is giving it up for vacations, shopping sprees, monthly stipends, and dinners, suddenly she doesn't enjoy sex and sex is only for the man's pleasure. She's being used. She's unhappy and empty inside. But if she gives it up to Marco for free, she's a modern, liberated woman.

Back in the day I had cut buddies. It was an enjoyable experience physically but at the end of the day, I couldn't count on any of those men for anything but an orgasm. I didn't feel used, but I did feel like I surrendered my power too quickly. Sex is great, sex is wonderful, sex is enjoyable, and sex is power for a woman. It's why selling the fantasy of sex has always been more lucrative than engaging in the act. The same women gyrating on stage, singing about getting cherries turned out, anacondas, and strip clubs and dollar bills probably have fewer sex partners than the average woman. One in particular has been sleeping with the same man for over a decade.

Casual sex for women might be liberating, but it isn't always smart. I believe in women embracing their sexuality but there are better ways to do it. These days I only have sex within some type of relationship where I have the upper hand emotionally, mentally, and physically. If I give you access to my body, I'm going to expect for you to come to my rescue when I need something. I need mental stimulation, adventure, and security. Men these days think offering some D is enough. Not for me. Without those other things, it's pretty unremarkable.
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amen.gif
 
Plenty of folks are fine with sex as exchange.

My thing is...it's inconsistent to say "casual sex ruins marriage" in one breath and then champion sex for cash in the next. Either casual sex ruins marriage or it doesn't. What the woman does or doesn't get out of it is irrelevant to men.
 
ArcticFemme said:
It's very telling when society is more open to accepting hook-up culture than "hooker" culture (as they call it). We will quickly defend a woman's right to have multiple, short-term flings with no payoff aside from a short-lived orgasm, but we'll still chastise women who demand payment of some type in exchange for sex. Where is this "women enjoy sex, too!" argument when it comes to gold-diggers and sugar babies? Once a woman is giving it up for vacations, shopping sprees, monthly stipends, and dinners, suddenly she doesn't enjoy sex and sex is only for the man's pleasure. She's being used. She's unhappy and empty inside. But if she gives it up to Marco for free, she's a modern, liberated woman.
.
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:yep: Exactly.

Geisha life >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> random cutbuddy situation IMO. lol
 
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