2019 Relationship And Dating Thread

OneShinyface said:
That's an excellent idea. You can work things out and determine if it's something you need to raise with him or not. Plus it will be fun later to go back and read what was going on and how you were feeling at that time. Come to think of it, I need to resume journaling myself. We've amassed a ton of good memories this first year and while we have the pictures to show for it, it would be great to have a document of my own thoughts and feelings.
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I second that. I've kept a journal consistently since college and I always use it to write down my thoughts about anything taking up thought space, not just in my relationship. Writing things down also helps me sort out my feelings so if/when I do bring things up with SO, I can express myself clearly.
 
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My hunni and I haven't seen each other in a week. We are getting together Saturday to spend time together. Its suppose to rain here all weekend since we are workaholics he and I will both be working Saturday before we meet up. I am thinking about just bringing over a bottle of wine and dinner and just help him relax. I have never met anyone yet that works more than I do, until I met him. I am so excited for this relaxing evening.
 
I have a bike (a very cool beach cruiser) that my Dad got for me the same year he passed. He and I used to ride bikes together and it was kind of symbolic in that way. It's a very special gift for me.

Some time ago, some movers totally messed it up--the quick release wheel levers were broken, the tires were flat, and I think they left it out in the rain so the chain was rusted. I didn't get it fixed for several reasons, but it bothered me soooo much. I had it in storage because it made me sad to look at. I got it out of storage a few months ago, but still didn't get it fixed.

Just got a picture from bae--that thang looks brand new, and is waiting for me to ride when I get home today. It's a gorgeous day here, too. I'm so happy right now. :2inlove:
 
My hunni and I had an amazing weekend. He wanted to go to speed zone. I guess he could tell how exhausted I was, so he decided to take me to dinner instead. I was so tired, I woke up at his place and totally forgot where I was until I felt him behind me fast asleep. This man is truly amazing and I usually don’t speak on men I date. He sent me a text Monday saying he would call later. Which is a bit out of the norm for us, we don’t really like phones. He calls to tell me he is having his wisdom tooth removed (all 4) and wanted to know if I would come and take him and pick him up and stay with him. We had already made plans to see each other Friday and I was leaving work early. I decided to take the whole day off. I am really just looking forward to taking care of him. This is really out of the norm for me... How have you ladies dealt with your men being sick?... I feel like this is a test as far as me taking care of him.
 
In the past three weeks, we've taken 2 trips together - 3 days in Phoenix and 4 days in Carlsbad.

I love our little getaways. We both have pretty demanding roles so it's nice to have some time where we're disconnected (for the most part) from everything and have time to focus on us. He's taught me how to become a more efficient packer. LOL And I love the perks of his platinum airline status.

I can't wait for our next trip. :2inlove:
 
This past weekend staying with him for 3 days was definitely a learning experience for both of us. This man is as stubborn as hell. He drove me nuts!!.. I take him to the dentist to get his teeth pulled and afterwards, he still chooses to talk even as the nurse tells him, it will cause him to bleed more. Finally I get him home and hes quiet. He falls asleep and its perfect. lol I tend to assist him and I guess he feels as if he is superman, and back to him old self. So the evening comes and of course he is back to wanting to do everything himself. I really want to just smack him.. lol Of course I am pouty and move to the other side of the bed and this man has the audacity to ignore me. lol Keep in mind he has all sisters. I am having a moment because my loony behind wanted to cuddle. I just fall asleep and wake up the next morning, and he's all like am I ok.. lol. Then he proceeds to tell me, I was being bratty and he was just going to let me have my moment. lol He says I am spoiled and doesn't mind that but if I want something just communicate with him. He loves to communicate which is what I love about him. We both spent the rest of the weekend sleeping, working and lots of coloring lol. We both are very head strong and, I am learning to let him lead even when I don't want him too. I love how he constantly ask if I am ok, and loves cooking for me.
 
SO wore me out last night... and not for the first time either. :look: He was quite proud of himself too. Then this morning over breakfast we had one of our deep conversations. :love: He has today mostly off but I had to leave and I really didn’t want to. :sad:

I really love him.

ETA: We spent Easter with my family and I loved it. My family loves him, and they’re very picky. He had fun too but his mom wanted him to spend the weekend with her and he’s not entirely used to telling her no and so he feels guilty. I asked him weeks ago so this was planned in advance. Even if we didn’t have something planned he didn’t have the energy to make the drive to his parents house. In fact when we spent a Sunday with his parents a couple weeks ago, he asked me to drive us down there. His mom is having a hard time letting him go. We knew this but she admitted it. At the same time she’s resistant to meeting my family and IMO it’s causing her to miss out on spending time with him.
 
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Just venting but sometimes I feel like SO's mom is in competition to keep her son's attention.
He's been extremely excited about the progress we're making as far as moving, closing date, etc. But literally every time his mom calls she's consistently reminding him she's not feeling well, she has a dr's appointment coming up, she barely ate anything today, etc. But then you log onto Facebook and EVERY weekend she's out with SO's dad at concerts, out to dinner with friends, drinking, hanging out at the movies, etc. I mean literally no mention of being sick.

And I noticed she's been doing this every week to him lately, but come the weekend she's fine. So last night SO was in a good mood telling me about his day just talking in general you know. Then he took a phone call and I noticed he looked worried/concerned and sat on the couch, so I instantly knew he was on the phone with his mom. More bad news, but as he was telling me the story I picked up on something. She called last week with this same story and said she already had the procedure done. So naturally I questioned him.
Now I’m not trying to argue with him I’m honestly not since we’ve been doing good for quite some time now. So I caught myself, I leaned back and let him process his feelings after the conversation he had with his mom. I gave him a kiss and his plate and went upstairs to watch Beyoncé on Netflix (again). But seriously why is she doing this to him? And as you listen to the stories and see the pictures, videos, etc of her out and about it definitely doesn’t add up.

I’m just venting ya’ll hopefully he starts to pick up on things but I’m not going to be the one to say too much.
 
ClassyJSP said:
Just venting but sometimes I feel like SO's mom is in competition to keep her son's attention.
He's been extremely excited about the progress we're making as far as moving, closing date, etc. But literally every time his mom calls she's consistently reminding him she's not feeling well, she has a dr's appointment coming up, she barely ate anything today, etc. But then you log onto Facebook and EVERY weekend she's out with SO's dad at concerts, out to dinner with friends, drinking, hanging out at the movies, etc. I mean literally no mention of being sick.

And I noticed she's been doing this every week to him lately, but come the weekend she's fine. So last night SO was in a good mood telling me about his day just talking in general you know. Then he took a phone call and I noticed he looked worried/concerned and sat on the couch, so I instantly knew he was on the phone with his mom. More bad news, but as he was telling me the story I picked up on something. She called last week with this same story and said she already had the procedure done. So naturally I questioned him.
Now I’m not trying to argue with him I’m honestly not since we’ve been doing good for quite some time now. So I caught myself, I leaned back and let him process his feelings after the conversation he had with his mom. I gave him a kiss and his plate and went upstairs to watch Beyoncé on Netflix (again). But seriously why is she doing this to him? And as you listen to the stories and see the pictures, videos, etc of her out and about it definitely doesn’t add up.

I’m just venting ya’ll hopefully he starts to pick up on things but I’m not going to be the one to say too much.
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That is sooooo frusrating! I've been here but I didn't handle it with as much style and grace as you! But you're doing the right thing love. Lean back. Don't play therapist. Focus on You! (I need to watch that Beyonce too!) and just be honey when he wants to vent about the mom. This too shall pass. Congrats on the house love!
 
I might have finally learned my lesson with staying friends with an ex. Purging folks and still need to keep purging...

An ex from 2014 who's been dating several other women since is with someone who sends me threatening texts because she disapproves of our friendship (or at least I thought he was a friend- lesson learned).
Her first text (s) were maybe a year and a half ago but then since this Easter I received 2 texts with physical threats. He's clearly been telling her my personal business and based on what she is saying, implies that I've been trying to get back with him (or that's how it reads to me). After the first text last week, I told him I wanted nothing to do with his friendship and blocked him. This morning I got another text from her. I'm unsure about whether to file for a restraining order or not.
Her last words were " I want revenge!!!"
 
Fine 4s said:
I might have finally learned my lesson with staying friends with an ex. Purging folks and still need to keep purging...

An ex from 2014 who's been dating several other women since is with someone who sends me threatening texts because she disapproves of our friendship (or at least I thought he was a friend- lesson learned).
Her first text (s) were maybe a year and a half ago but then since this Easter I received 2 texts with physical threats. He's clearly been telling her my personal business and based on what she is saying, implies that I've been trying to get back with him (or that's how it reads to me). After the first text last week, I told him I wanted nothing to do with his friendship and blocked him. This morning I got another text from her. I'm unsure about whether to file for a restraining order or not.
Her last words were " I want revenge!!!"
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I would definitely get a restraining order. I had an ex stalk me and thought he was just infatuated, but come to find out he was really crazy and couldn't let go. He even kicked in my parents door. Girl get that restraining order and save all messages. Does he know where you stay?
 
She went through his phone so not so hard to get but she said things that I know came from him.
I saw signs of him not being a nice person but for some reason I never thought it would be me...pay attention to how folks treat others. Anyway, I'm satisfied knowing who he really is now rather than later. He was in my life for a total of 96 months too long and now I know he could never be my friend. Something quite freeing in cutting people off....

As for her, I contacted a police officer neighbor who told me that I need 3 forms of harassment to file a RO so I'm waiting on that 3 text lol I deleted old ones from a couple of years ago when she had her first flare up.
I feel like sending these texts to his mom (which I'm friends with from before even meeting him) and to his sister....should I get petty? Probably not huh?
 
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Fine 4s said:
She went through his phone so not so hard to get but she said things that I know came from him.
I saw signs of him not being a nice person but for some reason I never thought it would be me...pay attention to how folks treat others. Anyway, I'm satisfied knowing who he really is now rather than later. He was in my life for a total of 96 months too long and now I know he could never be my friend. Something quite freeing in cutting people off....

As for her, I contacted a police officer neighbor who told me that I need 3 forms of harassment to file a RO so I'm waiting on that 3 text lol I deleted old ones from a couple of years ago when she had her first flare up.
I feel like sending these texts to his mom (which I'm friends with from before even meeting him) and to his sister....should I get petty? Probably not huh?
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No that would not be petty, I would inform her as well. God forbid that woman was to follow through on her threats. I would also recommend telling your family as well. Go through all protective measures you need to, for your own safety!
 
Fine 4s said:
Really @THicknLong I thought that would enrage her even more no? I don't respond to her texts or calls.
I need to marinate on all this....
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I would not be concerned about enraging her. I would be more concerned about my safety. Are you licensed to carry?.. Sounds like you are more concerned about her than your self.. Not trying to upset you, as a woman that lives alone I always remind myself my safety is my first concern. like @sarumoki said, people are crazy!
 
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