2017 Relationship And Dating Thread

Fine 4s said:
Just popping in to check in on @qchelle
*pokes in head*
Click to expand...

:lol: nothing yet!

He actually just asked me on a date for this Thursday (which never happens...week day dates). But I declined cuz I'm busy (movie date with friends). And we won't see each other this weekend (cuz I'm busy). We haven't seen each other since last weekend (I was busy this weekend).

Wow, typing this out makes me sound like kind of a ***** :lol:

I wish him the best! :lachen:
 
Last edited:
qchelle said:
:lol: nothing yet!

He actually just asked me on a date for this Thursday (which never happens...week day dates). But I declined cuz I'm busy (movie date with friends). And we won't see each other this weekend (cuz I'm busy). We haven't seen each other since last weekend (I was busy this weekend).

Wow, typing this out makes me sound like kind of a ***** :lol:

I wish him the best! :lachen:
Click to expand...

:rofl::rofl::rofl:
 
sarumoki said:
Okay, let's talk dating and depression.

I was first diagnosed about three or four years ago. Therapy, medication, the whole shebang. Then I moved and stopped treatment because I hated my new doctor and I've avoided going back for treatment since. I don't feel like I'm "depressed enough to need it", if that makes sense.

Anyway, lately I've been feeling really apathetic and unmotivated and I can tell it's the beginning of an episode coming on. Unfortunately, this has carried over into my relationship and he's accused me of not caring about him anymore and I think that he thinks that I want to leave. This couldn't be further from the truth. I've only ever mentioned my depression to him in passing, in a story about something that happened in the past. The way I told the story, it seemed like it was something that happened one time and that was it. I don't know how to have a conversation with him about what is happening with me right now. Part of me is scared to because the last time, it was the beginning of the end of my last relationship.

Thoughts on how I can talk to him about my depression?
Click to expand...

If you're depressed enough that he feels that something is going on and you feel like there's an episode coming on, you probably need to address this with a physician before it takes you down.

If you choose to tell him, be brief and be honest. Some people can handle the truth and some can't. The one who can handle it is the one for you. Eventually it will come out and you don't want him to feel like you were being deceptive.

I hope you find a doctor that you're comfortable with.
 
I don't why I keep walking away from this man. Last year I walked away. Towards the end of the year I always thought of him. This year I got back in contact around July. Just two weeks ago he was calling me his girl and last week I left again. I already regret it. :cry3: Smh. Don't know if it's my depression, anxiety. Not believing him on what he says and does.
 
qchelle said:
:lol: nothing yet!

He actually just asked me on a date for this Thursday (which never happens...week day dates). But I declined cuz I'm busy (movie date with friends). And we won't see each other this weekend (cuz I'm busy). We haven't seen each other since last weekend (I was busy this weekend).

Wow, typing this out makes me sound like kind of a ***** :lol:

I wish him the best! :lachen:
Click to expand...

We saw Marshall and it was really good! Anyone else seen it yet?
 
I know I shouldn’t complain but...
Bae is gone home to ATL for the weekend for Morehouse homecoming. :)
Why does he keep calling and sending videos and pictures that I have to respond to? :rolleyes:He don’t need to “check in” but 1x day MAX.
Like WHYYYY are we having these long asse hour-long convos? :blah:I’m trying to get this henna in my hair done, then eat my fat food while watching Eyes Wide Shut in peace. God only knows when our next weekend apart will be so I can get ugly, look a mess and just leggo.
Go enjoy yo’self luv! Will see ya tomorrow.
 
Sosa said:
I know I shouldn’t complain but...
Bae is gone home to ATL for the weekend for Morehouse homecoming. :)
Why does he keep calling and sending videos and pictures that I have to respond to? :rolleyes:He don’t need to “check in” but 1x day MAX.
Like WHYYYY are we having these long asse hour-long convos? :blah:I’m trying to get this henna in my hair done, then eat my fat food while watching Eyes Wide Shut in peace. God only knows when our next weekend apart will be so I can get ugly, look a mess and just leggo.
Go enjoy yo’self luv! Will see ya tomorrow.
Click to expand...
Men always want all your attention when you have a million things to do. Whenever I feel like my boyfriend isn't paying me enough attention, I just make a to-do list and suddenly there he is. It never fails.

Mine was the same way when he went on vacation. Wanting to FaceTime me all day long. Like you're in another country for the first time and you're gonna stay in your room on the phone?
 
So Imma start posting here about how things are going with Classic Man since we go out pretty regularly now and communicate in some form almost daily.

We had a movie date at his place on Friday night. My first time seeing his place. It's bigger than I thought. And considering he lives in SF and makes enough to not have roommates and lives in a pretty decent area, it's nice. I love how he made sure I was comfortable and okay the entire date. He does that anyway but picked it up a notch on this date.

We're also exploring each other physically now but still PG areas. :look: Cuddling on the couch and making out a little. He got a little of my neck as I was trying to get up and leave. Which was funny because when the movie finished he looked like he was about to go to sleep. :lachen::lachen: Then he starts kissing me. Men.

He also had to leave briefly after I arrived to go pick up food. But before he leaves, he walks all the way over to me and starts kissing me as I'm checking the Warriors game on my phone. So I had a look on my face like "whatchu want?" o_O He's not into sports at all which is interesting. It's been a loooooong time since I've liked a man this much. :p
 
sarumoki said:
Okay, let's talk dating and depression.

I was first diagnosed about three or four years ago. Therapy, medication, the whole shebang. Then I moved and stopped treatment because I hated my new doctor and I've avoided going back for treatment since. I don't feel like I'm "depressed enough to need it", if that makes sense.

Anyway, lately I've been feeling really apathetic and unmotivated and I can tell it's the beginning of an episode coming on. Unfortunately, this has carried over into my relationship and he's accused me of not caring about him anymore and I think that he thinks that I want to leave. This couldn't be further from the truth. I've only ever mentioned my depression to him in passing, in a story about something that happened in the past. The way I told the story, it seemed like it was something that happened one time and that was it. I don't know how to have a conversation with him about what is happening with me right now. Part of me is scared to because the last time, it was the beginning of the end of my last relationship.

Thoughts on how I can talk to him about my depression?
Click to expand...
I don't have any advice but I am in the same situation as you. I live with anxiety-depression and I have an anxiety episode every month or so. If it doesn't go away in a couple weeks it can turn into a depression episode. I see a therapist regularly and am on medication but this is my reality. Classic Man knows I struggle with anxiety-depression but not the day to day stuff. We're not official yet so I don't see any reason to share. I also have a strong support system of family and friends with a similar struggle so I don't feel the need to talk about it with people who don't experience it as well. But I know I'll have to at some point with Classic Man. If nothing else, if we start having sex, I'll have to switch up my medication. :look:
 
You know how when ppl are getting married they are all like “he is everything I hoped for, my best friend” etc. Like I don’t feel that way about my SO at all. I wanna dump him every month (for no reason).
I gave myself a deadline to either want him or let him go...it’s next week.

We have a beach weekend trip coming up, so unless I get back feeling better about us...I’m calling it.
 
I’ve decided to end things with him. I mentioned my unhappiness about certain things, there was some improvement but he continues to be complacent. I’m not going to be that woman who continually moans who continually complains. I’m not trying to change a grown man. So I’m simply going to walk away and they’ll be no reasoning, no second chances. It’s harsh but my primary interests is myself and my feelings and I’m not wasting time with a man who’s not on the same page.

I’m proud of myself because the younger me would have accepted that bull-ish and made excuses for it. No, no more, I deserve better

I hate these conversations but needs must.
 
Good for you @LushLox!

Gotta look out for numero uno :yep:. Tell him him what’s up and KIM. You don’t have to explain or justify why you are leaving either. This is your life and you only get one. And besides he’s living how he wants, hence little change when you brought concerns to his attention. So yes bye :wave: :).
 
LushLox said:
I’ve decided to end things with him. I mentioned my unhappiness about certain things, there was some improvement but he continues to be complacent. I’m not going to be that woman who continually moans who continually complains. I’m not trying to change a grown man. So I’m simply going to walk away and they’ll be no reasoning, no second chances. It’s harsh but my primary interests is myself and my feelings and I’m not wasting time with a man who’s not on the same page.

I’m proud of myself because the younger me would have accepted that bull-ish and made excuses for it. No, no more, I deserve better

I hate these conversations but needs must.
Click to expand...

Its great to see that change in yourself :).

I've always gone by the belief that having a man (or a friend) in my life that loves and respects me less than I love myself makes no damn sense. You're supposed to add to my life not subtract from it lol.

tenor.gif
 
This man is trying my patience. I don't remember which thread it was in, but someone (I think it was @Zaynab) said that some women can't keep a man because they want their man to be their woke best friend....

That's how my man is. I work hard everyday. When I get home I just need you to shut up and look pretty. Don't try to get me to debate politics. Me no curr
 
He's spending the night tonight. I'm reclined on the couch* and he's laying horizontally with his head on my lap ASLEEP -____- he's been asleep for about an hour y'all. Its 920pm. This man goes to sleep between 730-830, regularly. He's 28. -___- fykin old, lame, tired ass.

I watched Grey's, now watching scandal. Think I'm gonna wake him up before htgawm and make him go to bed.

*couch brag!: my couch is dope af. It has reclining seats and it vibrates :lol:
 
So last weekend was super hectic, it was my brother’s wedding and I broke out in hives/contact dermatitis all over my face the night before due to all the bridesmaids stress. My SO really stepped in and took care of me and diffused a lot of the chaos. Got my meds, drove me everywhere, fed me, checked up on me during the 50/11 photo shoots and stayed with me.

I can’t lie, when he arrived at the venue he was looking FAF in his suit. I wanted to hop out of my gown and get a quickie in. We danced the night away and I just loved seeing him interact with the family.
 
I was talking to my SO about trick or treating and he said when he was lil, his parents would A. search through the candy and B. automatically throw out half the candy because they didn't want him eating all of it. Now, I'd heard of people doing this nowadays, but my parents didn't do any of this. I ate the candy while we were walking around from house to house lol. But I realize that my parents were a lot more lenient than a lot of other peoples parents.

But now I just see a FB friends' video and the caption and video are of him (dad) taking his toddlers candy, throwing it ALL out and replacing it all with candy that he bought! Talkin bout I don't have time to double check :lol: I was like wow!

I told SO that that's dumb as hell. Why did his parents continue taking him to more houses if they didn't want him to eat all the candy!? He said cuz of the fun of it. I said well that's fine if you want to do that with your kids, but if I'm the mom, I won't be going trick or treating with yall. That can be a daddy-kids thing cuz mommy don't have time for daddys antics. I think that's a nice daddy thing: taking the kids trick or treating. yep, sounds like a daddy job to me lol

Everybody worried about people killing their kid on Halloween. Stay your dumbass home then :look:

Kinda OT. But it reminds me of how my aunt/uncle wouldn't let my cousin open all of her presents at once, in a frenzy, on Christmas morning. Like they wanted her calm down before she opened them lmao. My mother (and me) couldn't understand whyyyy?? Why won't they just let her open her presents the way she wants to?! She's excited! It's freaking Christmas! People are so weird about their kids man lol.

I LOVE the elf on a shelf trend. I can't wait to do this. **** I may just start with myself this Christmas :lol:
 
I think I'm a little sick of him atm. He wants to take me to lunch this Friday. I said ok, meanwhile hoping he cancels lmao. He told me he paid for our hotel for our nola nye trip and I really wanted to send a thumbs up emoji lmaoo. He asked me if I was free for veterans day cuz he wants to "come over" aka take me out (he always wants to go somewhere first when he comes over my place) siiiiiiigh fine lol maybe he'll change his mind. We actually did end up seeing each other 2wknds ago (or maybe it was last wknd) and he "came over" and when he got there he asked me "do you wanna go to a haunted house? then we can go to BJs?" I got kinda annoyed and said no I don't want to go to a haunted house, but yea let's go to BJs (its a brewhouse/restaurant). So we went and he says I "ruined his surprise (haunted house) but it's okay, get whatever you want babe" (talkin bout the menu). siiiiiiiiiiiigh lol he was disappointed but got over it and still seemed very happy. I said that's not how you do a surprise...you don't ask the person. You just say 'we're going here' and like kidnap them and just go do it :lol: he gave me a choice! sooo his fault lmao.

But we went out this past weekend and had a great time! We went to his grandads bday party (lol) and his whole entire family was there, as usual. But he was allll over me the whole time!! That never happens! Whenever it's one of his family events, he's always up and mingling with his family. But he was laser focused on me the whole time. Very strange. I kept asking him if he was drunk or high :lol:

After the party, we went to Baltimore (from Bowie) to a little gathering at my friends' bfs house. They had edibles and were in a sharing mood. SO paid for our ubers to and from and lawwwwd the surge coming back (around 2am) was like $180! :eek: going there was only $40! Glad he was drunk, high, and sleepy :lol:
 
qchelle said:
I think I'm a little sick of him atm. He wants to take me to lunch this Friday. I said ok, meanwhile hoping he cancels lmao. He told me he paid for our hotel for our nola nye trip and I really wanted to send a thumbs up emoji lmaoo. He asked me if I was free for veterans day cuz he wants to "come over" aka take me out (he always wants to go somewhere first when he comes over my place) siiiiiiigh fine lol maybe he'll change his mind. We actually did end up seeing each other 2wknds ago (or maybe it was last wknd) and he "came over" and when he got there he asked me "do you wanna go to a haunted house? then we can go to BJs?" I got kinda annoyed and said no I don't want to go to a haunted house, but yea let's go to BJs (its a brewhouse/restaurant). So we went and he says I "ruined his surprise (haunted house) but it's okay, get whatever you want babe" (talkin bout the menu). siiiiiiiiiiiigh lol he was disappointed but got over it and still seemed very happy. I said that's not how you do a surprise...you don't ask the person. You just say 'we're going here' and like kidnap them and just go do it :lol: he gave me a choice! sooo his fault lmao.

But we went out this past weekend and had a great time! We went to his grandads bday party (lol) and his whole entire family was there, as usual. But he was allll over me the whole time!! That never happens! Whenever it's one of his family events, he's always up and mingling with his family. But he was laser focused on me the whole time. Very strange. I kept asking him if he was drunk or high :lol:

After the party, we went to Baltimore (from Bowie) to a little gathering at my friends' bfs house. They had edibles and were in a sharing mood. SO paid for our ubers to and from and lawwwwd the surge coming back (around 2am) was like $180! :eek: going there was only $40! Glad he was drunk, high, and sleepy :lol:
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Only one thing caught my eye in this paragraph....
Glad you had a good time out at the party.
 
Sumra said:
Its great to see that change in yourself :).

I've always gone by the belief that having a man (or a friend) in my life that loves and respects me less than I love myself makes no damn sense. You're supposed to add to my life not subtract from it lol.

tenor.gif
Click to expand...
I understand this but I don’t. There is no possible way anyone could ever love me more than I love myself.
 
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