Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in public?

[MusicandWine]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

I am imagining that . . . what did she do when you did that? *lol*

She just kept staring until we were out of her range of sight. I don't usually react that way, I am mild spirited and I try to ignore or give people the benefit of a doubt but I guess I was having a bad day. I'm only human, some days my patience for other people's lack of understanding just isn't there.

 

[Lucie]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

Yes, he's white. Yes, he's muslim. Jeez Glib where have you been?

Glib has been the same place as me because I never knew as well.

DH and I don't have problems. Often times I forget he is white unless I am on this forum discussing IRR. Black men always tell him, "That's you? Wow, that's what's up!" Then proceed with the compliments. Also, most of his BFFs are black men. He speaks Jamaican patois from being BFF's with a Jamaican man since they were two years old.

Call me naive but I believe you get what you think about or fear. I never think of his color, nor he of mine and perhaps this is why we do not have issues, no matter where we go. I've been all over the world with him and people come up to us and tell us how beautiful we look together.

GG I think you and your sweetie look very good together! Nothing like that funky pic you posted.

 

[Bachelorette]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

I had a (white) date offer to buy a black dude a drink once because he was sticking to us at a bar.

My date was super chill about the whole thing.

.

That's hilarious.

 

[carolinetwin]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

Do any of you feel like you're selling out? Not tryna be controversial, just asking....

 

[Bunny77]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

Do any of you feel like you're selling out? Not tryna be controversial, just asking....

Selling out what? Who bought me? Does someone own me or something that I gotta be sold out?

Please.

 

[Christelyn]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

Do any of you feel like you're selling out? Not tryna be controversial, just asking....

Interesting that this be brought up; and since it has, I wanted to present an excerpt of a chapter in a book I'm writing on IRR, where I try to argue against some wrong thinking. Would love to hear what you all think of it:

Assumption #4: Dating interracially means I’m disloyal to my black brothers.

Attitude Adjustment: Every time I hear this argument I often wonder why, for so many years, black men have had a pass on dating and marrying interracially. That assumption is so 1960s. Today, it is accepted – and almost expected -- when an accomplished black man leaves his community and marries a woman who is not black. And while there are black women who may not like it, the level of outrage is not nearly as equal when a black woman follows suit. There is a pressure for us to be down with our brothers, to love and protect them, despite their statistical inability to protect and nurture us; to marry us and be fathers to our children.

Besides, the black man’s animus about black women dating interracially or interculturally has less to do with solidarity and a lot more to do with control. “The desire for marriage [by black women] places black men in a position of power,” says Cooper. “He is able to dictate how high, and how many hoops a woman must jump through before he’ll consider marrying her.” If at all. (I have so been there.) Women who dare to date outside their race are going after what they want and it’s making some black men very angry. And so what?

Loyalty goes both ways, ladies. Don’t miss an opportunity to find the love of your life because you’re scared of what someone who doesn’t want you thinks of you.

 

[DirtyJerzeyGirly]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

I havent had any sort of reactions. The only one I remember is when I was in the military. There was this one black guy who never said anything to me. But when he one day saw me talking and walking with this one white guy who I did like he asked me in front of him (we were walking), "Are you talking to him?" I said, "No we are just friends." Then just went about his way.

After that the black guy never said anything else to me.

Selling out? Ummmm....what?

 

[Christelyn]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

I havent had any sort of reactions. The only one I remember is when I was in the military. There was this one black guy who never said anything to me. But when he one day saw me talking and walking with this one white guy who I did like he asked me in front of him (we were walking), "Are you talking to him?" I said, "No we are just friends." Then just went about his way.

After that the black guy never said anything else to me.

Selling out? Ummmm....what?

@ the bolded...this is what I find interesting...it's like that guy was peeing on you...asserting his territory even though he had never expressed any interest in you until he thought you were stepping out. geesh!

 

[DirtyJerzeyGirly]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

@ the bolded...this is what I find interesting...it's like that guy was peeing on you...asserting his territory even though he had never expressed any interest in you until he thought you were stepping out. geesh!

Yeah and the funny thing is...whenever another black guy would talk and walk with me he didn't care.....never walked up to me or anything

 

[Bachelorette]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

I havent had any sort of reactions. The only one I remember is when I was in the military. There was this one black guy who never said anything to me. But when he one day saw me talking and walking with this one white guy who I did like he asked me in front of him (we were walking), "Are you talking to him?" I said, "No we are just friends." Then just went about his way.

After that the black guy never said anything else to me.

Selling out? Ummmm....what?

I sincerely wish you had responded with a "and if I am?"

 

[DirtyJerzeyGirly]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

I sincerely wish you had responded with a "and if I am?"

It wouldn't be a thread without you in it gal.

But in all honesty him and I weren't an item. He didn't even know that I liked them at the time. But if someone does come up to me and ask that, yeah I def. say that.

 

[BlackMasterPiece]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

Interesting that this be brought up; and since it has, I wanted to present an excerpt of a chapter in a book I'm writing on IRR, where I try to argue against some wrong thinking. Would love to hear what you all think of it:

You're definitely bout to hear what I think lol

Assumption #4: Dating interracially means I’m disloyal to my black brothers.

Attitude Adjustment: Every time I hear this argument I often wonder why, for so many years, black men have had a pass on dating and marrying interracially.

I'm sorry what!?!?erplexed a pass? Can you say Emmit Till? Getting strung up by your neck on a tree for so much as a whistle denotes a societal pass to you? What history books you been readin? The racial American history of never-never land? lol there was also recently a couple in Louisiana that was comprised of a Black man and a white woman and the justice f the peace refused to marry them...so its definitely far from smooth sailing for BM/WW couples.

That assumption is so 1960s. Today, it is accepted – and almost expected -- when an accomplished black man leaves his community and marries a woman who is not black.

It is expected, but it is definitely NOT accepted yet....they get just as much flak.

And while there are black women who may not like it, the level of outrage is not nearly as equal when a black woman follows suit. There is a pressure for us to be down with our brothers, to love and protect them, despite their statistical inability to protect and nurture us; to marry us and be fathers to our children.

I think its incredibly ironic for you to be stereotyping Black men when this chapter is supposed to be predicated on refraining from that very tendency.....I mean really.

If you find yourself consistently encountering hood, deadbeat, uneducated black men, then that means that you need to improve your circle and start patronizing more sophisticated events and environments...that does NOT mean that all Black men are that way. Exceptionalism is just that: exceptional. You're not gonna find it everywhere...but it does exist and in sizable numbers. I meet quality black men regularly.

The "statistics" say alot of things. Statistically I should have been raised on a one parent household; the reality is: I grew up with married, loving, involved parents. Statistically, my parents should have a sub-par education; the reality is: they are both engineers with graduate degrees and math professors as well as business owners. Statistically, I should be a baby's momma; the reality is: my child will only be born after I am married for a few years. Statistically, my brother and the men in my family should be under-educated criminal deadbeats with babys-mommas all over; the reality is: the men in my family are doctors, attorneys, engineers, tech-specialists who marry the mothers of their children and stay with them. I could go on and on....and there are many families just like us. So the statistics do not always tell the whole story and its actually pretty surprising to see a black woman condemn black men for the same statistics that could very well condemn us.

Besides, the black man’s animus about black women dating interracially or interculturally has less to do with solidarity and a lot more to do with control. “The desire for marriage [by black women] places black men in a position of power,” says Cooper. “He is able to dictate how high, and how many hoops a woman must jump through before he’ll consider marrying her.” If at all. (I have so been there.) Women who dare to date outside their race are going after what they want and it’s making some black men very angry. And so what?

This is also a gross generalization, if you're dating a commitment-phobe..... you're dating a commitment-phobe...PERIOD it has zero to do with the color of his skin.

Last summer I met a brotha in the city while my hair was in a curly fro, I came to find out he was pursuing his masters. We went out on our first date at the metropolitan museum of Art......halfway through the date he was asking me weather I would be willing to relocate down south should we get married and have kids. Again, that was on the first date. I recently turned down a proposal from a recent Cornell Grad (a brotha) as well so if you continually attract men that have an aversion to commitment then you need to ask yourself some questions and not put that on the black male population.

Loyalty goes both ways, ladies. Don’t miss an opportunity to find the love of your life because you’re scared of what someone who doesn’t want you thinks of you.

Wow...again with the generalizations.....black men DEFINITELY want me and my black friends. I'm 100% in favor of sista's exploring all their options....but it should never be a case of being burned by a brotha and running to white men in a reactionary sense.

I feel you've sort of defeated your purpose by approaching the topic the way you have here. Instead of stereotyping Black men the same way the media has, why not just speak on whats in your heart and how you became open to interracial dating.

 

[Christelyn]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

You're definitely bout to hear what I think lol

I'm sorry what!?!?erplexed a pass? Can you say Emmit Till? Getting strung up by your neck on a tree for so much as a whistle denotes a societal pass to you? What history books you been readin? The racial American history of never-never land? lol there was also recently a couple in Louisiana that was comprised of a Black man and a white woman and the justice f the peace refused to marry them...so its definitely far from smooth sailing for BM/WW couples. Perhaps that line should be rephrased. Since roughly the 1980's black men have dated and married women outside their race (not just white, I think you might just be assuming I'm talking in strictly Black and white; I'm talking interracial and intercultural. The same however, can not be said for black women. Again, I can quote another state from the Census.

It is expected, but it is definitely NOT accepted yet....they get just as much flak.

I think its incredibly ironic for you to be stereotyping Black men when this chapter is supposed to be predicated on refraining from that very tendency.....I mean really.

If you find yourself consistently encountering hood, deadbeat, uneducated black men, then that means that you need to improve your circle and start patronizing more sophisticated events and environments...that does NOT mean that all Black men are that way. Exceptionalism is just that: exceptional. You're not gonna find it everywhere...but it does exist and in sizable numbers. I meet quality black men regularly. Black women outnumber black men by 2 million. Do we have enough "exceptional" black men for all of us? Nope. I'm simply stating data. The concern from the OP was that she was getting flak. Then, there was someone who wondered if dating 'out' was being a sell out. I never said get with a white guy. I'm all for interracial and intercultural relationships, whether that person be black, brown, red, yellow or purple; worships in a mosque, a temple or a hill at sunset. The truth is what the truth is. (Some) Brothers get mad when they see BW step out. I bet folks on here have stories for days about that.

The "statistics" say alot of things. Statistically I should have been raised on a one parent household; the reality is: I grew up with married, loving, involved parents. Statistically, my parents should have a sub-par education; the reality is: they are both engineers with graduate degrees and math professors as well as business owners. Statistically, I should be a baby's momma; the reality is: my child will only be born after I am married for a few years. Statistically, my brother and the men in my family should be under-educated criminal deadbeats with babys-mommas all over; the reality is: the men in my family are doctors, attorneys, engineers, tech-specialists who marry the mothers of their children and stay with them. I could go on and on....and there are many families just like us. So the statistics do not always tell the whole story and its actually pretty surprising to see a black woman condemn black men for the same statistics that could very well condemn us. Yes, stats are just generalizations, but truthfully, this is how humans work--you have to generalize at some level, otherwise you could not get through your day because of all the sensory processing and reprocessing necessary to judge things individually.

This is also a gross generalization, if you're dating a commitment-phobe..... you're dating a commitment-phobe...PERIOD it has zero to do with the color of his skin. So...the women should just poo-poo that stat that says only 21% marry? (That's from the 2006 Census)

Last summer I met a brotha in the city while my hair was in a curly fro, I came to find out he was pursuing his masters. We went out on our first date at the metropolitan museum of Art......halfway through the date he was asking me weather I would be willing to relocate down south should we get married and have kids. Again, that was on the first date. I recently turned down a proposal from a recent Cornell Grad (a brotha) as well so if you continually attract men that have an aversion to commitment then you need to ask yourself some questions and not put that on the black male population. That's great for you...it sounds like you get a lot of play. So...that means everything I say is suspect? I really don't mean any offense about what I'm going to say next...the thinking of the bolded is self-centered. Because you have no problems, everything contrary to your experience must not be true.

Wow...again with the generalizations.....black men DEFINITELY want me and my black friends. I'm 100% in favor of sista's exploring all their options....but it should never be a case of being burned by a brotha and running to white men in a reactionary sense. Yes, that is true. Again, the generalization is based on statistics, and yes, my own experiences. Believe me, I dated a lot of black men...good and not so good. This isn't a case where I'm burned and black-man-slammin.' The assertion is based on stats, so yes, the copy has to be general. BMP, I have NO DOUBT black men want you--you are smart and attractive. But just because you have no problems, the generalization is wrong. Not every woman who can't find love with the *right* black man lives in the ghetto.

I feel you've sort of defeated your purpose by approaching the topic the way you have here. Instead of stereotyping Black men the same way the media has, why not just speak on whats in your heart and how you became open to interracial dating.

My replies are bolded.
Lastly: thanks for your feedback! As a writer, you have to walk a fine line between generalization, stereotypes, stats, and what is true. Otherwise, you'll sound too wishy-washy. To say that most black men want black women, and all the stuff out there is just generalization, would mean that I would have to take the position that all stats are wrong, and tell readers to ignore everything. Yes, it is essential that I must generalize in some way. A position must be made, a line must be drawn. That's why I'm trying to just have facts, (which I still know people will always dispute; there were people who also insisted the world was flat) and then follow up with my experience. So here's my formula:
A: Present the facts
B: Use my experiences and those of others to expand the argument that BW should stop worrying so much about "selling out" and start "buying in" to love of all shades and cultures.

 

[Christelyn]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

BLACKMASTERPIECE SAID: I feel you've sort of defeated your purpose by approaching the topic the way you have here. Instead of stereotyping Black men the same way the media has, why not just speak on whats in your heart and how you became open to interracial dating.

You are right. In the past I have put these topics on blast, and I'm going to get a lot of push back from people who disagree. However, in a thread in which the topic is brought up and a question is asked, I feel that the copy I posted is both appropos and possibly, helpful. (I did get one Thank You!)

 

[SW2011]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

Do any of you feel like you're selling out? Not tryna be controversial, just asking....

Nope. Never. I'm in love. My fiance' is the person that God intended for my life. We were destined to be together so that we could positively impact the world. I don't have time to be worried about skin color, height, hair color, etc. His relationship with Christ is the most important thing.

 

[BlackMasterPiece]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

Perhaps that line should be rephrased. Since roughly the 1980's black men have dated and married women outside their race (not just white, I think you might just be assuming I'm talking in strictly Black and white; I'm talking interracial and intercultural. The same however, can not be said for black women. Again, I can quote another state from the Census.

It should definitely be rephrased...there has been a very violent historic reaction to BM/WW intermingling...and I wouldn't go so far as to say its socially accepted now considering that history.

I do agree that Black women have less of a tendency to "date out" and I do think that they should be open to all their options....but for the right reasons.

Black women outnumber black men by 2 million. Do we have enough "exceptional" black men for all of us? Nope. I'm simply stating data.

Yes and according to that same "data" your name should be Hennessy Boomshika Alize, you should have 6 kids, live in the projects, be on welfare, possibly while HIV+ unable to find a man. So pardon me if I don't swear by these statistics you speak so highly of.

I believe that if Black Women as a collective demonstrate a more refined taste and higher standards, the black men that arent up to par will feel the pressure to become so....I think part of the problem is black women resigning themselves to being mistreated. If we had higher requirements the brothas would rise up to meet them....of course there is much more that needs to go into it...but thats a start

The concern from the OP was that she was getting flak. Then, there was someone who wondered if dating 'out' was being a sell out. I never said get with a white guy. I'm all for interracial and intercultural relationships, whether that person be black, brown, red, yellow or purple; worships in a mosque, a temple or a hill at sunset. The truth is what the truth is. (Some) Brothers get mad when they see BW step out. I bet folks on here have stories for days about that.

Well I recognize that this is a real phenomena...I've experienced it myself.

Yes, stats are just generalizations, but truthfully, this is how humans work--you have to generalize at some level, otherwise you could not get through your day because of all the sensory processing and reprocessing necessary to judge things individually.

LOL aka conscious THOUGHT, I think it is helpful to judge people on an individual basis rather then generalizing...even if it takes more effort.

So...the women should just poo-poo that stat that says only 21% marry? (That's from the 2006 Census)

One of the most heavily emphasized portions of my recent statistics course is that statistics rarely tell the whole story.

That's great for you...it sounds like you get a lot of play. So...that means everything I say is suspect? I really don't mean any offense about what I'm going to say next...the thinking of the bolded is self-centered. Because you have no problems, everything contrary to your experience must not be true.

I didn't say I have no problems and part of my statement was that I know of many black women that are regularly finding eligible good black men to date.

Yes, that is true. Again, the generalization is based on statistics, and yes, my own experiences. Believe me, I dated a lot of black men...good and not so good. This isn't a case where I'm burned and black-man-slammin.' The assertion is based on stats, so yes, the copy has to be general. BMP, I have NO DOUBT black men want you--you are smart and attractive. But just because you have no problems, the generalization is wrong. Not every woman who can't find love with the *right* black man lives in the ghetto.

Thanks for the compliment....I think there are alot of sistas just like me out there I didn't mention the word ghetto or where women live even once in my original post I simply said they have to change up their activities or environments if they find they are not interacting with the right kinds of brothas.

Lastly: thanks for your feedback! As a writer, you have to walk a fine line between generalization, stereotypes, stats, and what is true. Otherwise, you'll sound too wishy-washy.

My pleasure.

To say that most black men want black women, and all the stuff out there is just generalization, would mean that I would have to take the position that all stats are wrong, and tell readers to ignore everything. Yes, it is essential that I must generalize in some way. A position must be made, a line must be drawn. That's why I'm trying to just have facts, (which I still know people will always dispute; there were people who also insisted the world was flat) and then follow up with my experience. So here's my formula:
A: Present the facts
B: Use my experiences and those of others to expand the argument that BW should stop worrying so much about "selling out" and start "buying in" to love of all shades and cultures.

I see what your intention is here....I would suggest that going forward, you focus more on how black women should be open for the sake of varied experiences and the universality of love and your own experience down this road rather then veering off into putting so much negative focus on Black men.

 

[Christelyn]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

^^The last thing you said is MY greatest challenge. Because, if most black men were great and marriageable, we wouldn't even be having a conversation. Fact is that, to a great degree, the stats are true. The trick is how to present it in a way that will not offend (most; some will be offended no matter how I try to present)

ETA: According to Stats, BMP, I'm a hybrid. I was raised by a loving two parent black family, am college educated and graduated cum laude from a prestigious Los Angeles university, but also had an OOW child. So in essence, while you might not call me Hennessy, you might call me Christelyn Boom Qui Qui Russell-Karazin! hee hee!

 

[BlackMasterPiece]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

/\ You got it Boom Qui-Qui! lol ah well we al have our positions on this matter ....but I'll end with this....you can't get mad at people generalizing about your mentality and motivations for getting into an IRR if you then turn around and confirm their suspicions by negatively generalizing black men.

 

[HollyGolightly]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

I live in DC and the reactions depend on the neighborhood. Back in undergrad my white/Asian boyfriend hardly ever came on campus because people were so nasty to us. We couldn't walk down Georgia Ave without people (usually Black men) talking ish.

Usually when I'm in the hood, Black men refuse to respect my relationship with a white guy. They'll see me holding hands with a white guy and still try to holla, like they're going out of their way to punk the guy.

I grew up down South, and I used to be embarassed to go out in public with my white step-dad. People would stare at our family whenever we went out.

 

[Renewed1]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

I'll admit that when I see a WM/BW I stare.


Only because, I'm asking God, where is my white man.....

WOW!!! I didn't think so many black women on here, wanted a White guy!

LOL!!!!

 

[DirtyJerzeyGirly]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

WOW!!! I didn't think so many black women on here, wanted a White guy!

LOL!!!!

I know right? I like wm too. It just seems that some people are more honest on the internet than in real life.

 

[TwistNMx]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

I've been with my husband for over 17 years (married just over 6 years), and I don't care if anyone has a problem with it. I notice rude looks depending on where we go...who cares? I feel that if anyone has a problem with us (people they don't know anything about), that it's their problem and not ours.

DH is white and kind of hard to miss LOL being that he's 6'5" and weighs about 240. We only get weird stares from older white people and of course black men, but other than that we're just a another couple out in the streets.

We get that too. I live in a predominantly white neighborhood and the older ww are insecure and I don't worry about them going home to their cats...now do I?

I am friends with a white guy and we're always going out to eat or to the club and people usually don't pay us any mind. Except for the first time we went out. We were walking around downtown and this homeless-looking black guy said I should get myself a real man. I just lol'ed in my head.

I guess he was supposed to be that sparkling example. LOL

It's interesting to see all these responses from women in Atlanta. My FH's parents were so worried about us being an interracial couple in the South. In fact, my FH's family friends asked about it, too. They're on the West Coast so they have no idea.

I'm on the West Coast and I can tell you that people are just as crazy. They just try to hide how they really feel.

Glib, I have to say that stares do indeed come with the territory. I got them, get them, will get them again. But! You grow thicker skin, and the more comfortable your are with Dutch, the more that confidence will be picked up on by others.
This is true Christelyn.

As for brothers staring and making stupid arse comments and trying to hit on women with their white BF are just like a bunch of dogs peeing on you--they're trying to mark territory.

That's too funny!

 

[JollyGal]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

I'll admit that when I see a WM/BW I stare.


Only because, I'm asking God, where is my white man.....

& Don't worry hun. You will meet the right man

To answer OP's question. Yes, when in a relationship we do get stares and comments it used to be really bad a few years ago so much so it cause an arguement between my ex and I. He did nothing to defend me when a group of street kids were saying horrible things to me about my choice of man and even spat at us... YES I know. Needless to say I do not venture in those areas unless I need to and I'm thankful that I do not have anyone in my circle who behaves like a feral child. I experience the negative behaviour in certain areas of my country...

 

[Sweet Charm]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

I actually smile when I see WM/BM couples I think to myself like its about time

 

[softblackcotton]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

Glib has been the same place as me because I never knew as well.

DH and I don't have problems. Often times I forget he is white unless I am on this forum discussing IRR. Black men always tell him, "That's you? Wow, that's what's up!" Then proceed with the compliments. Also, most of his BFFs are black men. He speaks Jamaican patois from being BFF's with a Jamaican man since they were two years old.

Holey Crap! An authentic white guy who speaks perfect Jamaican patois! I I totally had a dream about this the other day. The only white Jamaican that I know is my dad's first cousin's husband who is a Jewish white man born and raised in Jamaica. GET OUT! I love BM/WM couples. I hope to be part of one, one day! Black guys don't like me anyway! I'm too dark for them and now that I'm wearing my natural 4b hair! forget it! I might as well be invisible! Most (if not almost all) of the compliments on my skin tone and hair have come from white people. All of the insults about my skin tone and hair have come from blacks. ALL.

 

[DarkVictory]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

Do any of you feel like you're selling out? Not tryna be controversial, just asking....

No, because no matter who I date/marry/hole up with in a Vegas motel, I will still be just as Black as ever.

To answer the OP: agree with others that it varies with the location. We've gotten some l-oo-ng l-oo-ks in so-called liberal places and been warmly welcomed in little countrified towns.

I've never felt peed on by a Black man and BY FAR the worse reactors have been ill-mannered WW.

 

[Foxglove]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

wrong thread

 

[mw138]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

I never really got stares with my ex. IDK, either I wasn't paying attention or people just didn't care. I'm sure people looked, but they didn't make it obvious. Maybe it's because he has tattoos everywhere and they were kind of scared. I also live in a pretty conservative area too.

 

[Blyss_curls]

Re: Ladies in relationships with white men - what kind of reaction do you get in publ

I know right? I like wm too. It just seems that some people are more honest on the internet than in real life.

I've been attracted to non-ethnic/caucasian boys since I was a kid. (blyss shrugs). My gf's were swooning over new edition, and I had a major thing for the Hardy Boys....what can I say?

I dated lots of different ethnicities, primarily aa--but ended up w/an irish guy. We bonded over our mutual love of rock music, films, the 80's and he adores southern food--the spicier the better (go figure). In fact, I've got to get off here and go finish cooking a pot of red beans and rice for his dinner.

We're in socal.
When we started dating, (over 13 years ago) I saw less people like us, so we got an occasional look, depending on where we were. When spending time in west la--not much if any. As we saw a lot of others like us. If in central la, more looks--usually from younger black men. ...yet a brother could walk by with a white girl, and they couldn't care less. Sorry, but that irritates me.

In our area, hardly ever.
A few times while dating (years ago) black women occasionally pulled me aside, and asked if we get looks, what it's like w/family, friends, etc. because she was considering dating IR....etc.

When spending time in Orange County (cue scary music) Some parts it's like something out of Deliverance....(way scarey)...we'd get some harsh looks (older white folks)...and we'd just smile, hold each other closer and say,"...take a picture it'll last longer." These days, not much at all.

In fact, we're pleasantly surprised to see LOTS of IR couplings in the oc, particularly at the disney resort area....many young/teen couples of all races and ethnicities, (I've seen bw/asian men, bw/white men, bm/latino women, etc. It always makes me smile. Also see lots of the little wanna be black-white boys (wiggas, I think they call themselves ) They make me laugh, for some reason. But that's another thread altogether...lol.