Interracial Dating or Marriage

[meaganita]

She thought you were going to do this:

 

[spelmanlocks]

Hmmm...maybe so? I think I'm going to ask her about it today just for kicks. It'd be interesting to find out if she was nervous because of a previous situation, or if she was just making assumptions.....

I think a lot of people assume black women only want black men. My two white female co-workers were shocked when I told them I thought this Asian guy who works in our building is attractive.

 

[Belle Du Jour]

No problems here my hubby is white. his family was challenged in the beginning. But 7 years later they see I really love Mike and they acknowledge that I am a good mother, so we kewl.

I never tried to gain their approval, I mean I was never rude to them, I just didn't go out of my to do anything special. I was myself. I figured if my Race is all you are going to judge me on, then there is nothing else I need to do but be me. You already decided you don't like me. nothing more for me to do.

I must confess it really helped that my first son was born looking like my husbands twin. White skin, blue eyes, bone straight blonde hair, it's as if I had nothing to do with his birth. like I was a surrogate mother for some white lady. LOL

The only bad thing is I can't beat my son in public, I know white folks would be on the phone telling the police that the nanny is beating the kids.

later
Onyx

LMAO

 

[Energist]

Yay! By limiting yourself you could be missing on the best thing that has ever come into your life! That is my experience with my husband. I'm sorry but I can't even imagine any other man doing it better than him emotionallly, physically, spiritually, intellectually and I've dated a rainbow of men to compare with.

 

[nikkablue]

I'm all for it, in my mothers family all my auntsa, uncles, and cousins (with exception of a few), and keep in mind my mother is from an old school catholic family so I have 4 aunts, 5 uncles, and about a billion cousins , are all married to or in relationships with white people. Heck, Even my dad's step-father is white. As a child, I remember thinking that it was the "norm" to date outside your race and that it was rare, as in the case of my parents, to marry with-in your own race. I've oly ever dated white guys, not that I wouldn't give a black guy a chance but 've just never really been around any black men other than my family, My parents weren't rich by any means but, I've alway grown up in predominatly white neighborhoods. I didn't even have black friends until I joined the military! I guess that makes me a little wierd huh?

 

[Leslie_C]

I'm all for it, in my mothers family all my auntsa, uncles, and cousins (with exception of a few), and keep in mind my mother is from an old school catholic family so I have 4 aunts, 5 uncles, and about a billion cousins , are all married to or in relationships with white people. Heck, Even my dad's step-father is white. As a child, I remember thinking that it was the "norm" to date outside your race and that it was rare, as in the case of my parents, to marry with-in your own race. I've oly ever dated white guys, not that I wouldn't give a black guy a chance but 've just never really been around any black men other than my family, My parents weren't rich by any means but, I've alway grown up in predominatly white neighborhoods. I didn't even have black friends until I joined the military! I guess that makes me a little wierd huh?

Im sure thats not weird considering you live in Omaha Nebraska! I grew up in a predominately white town in east TN, but I still always thought I would marry a black man. To my suprise, years after high school and meeting up in a whole different state, Im now getting married to a white guy who I went to high school with. Funny how life is sometimes. I left that town thinking I was never going to find a decent man....yet I end up with someone from my home town. All I can say now is that God has a funny sense of humor that Ive went thru all I have over the past several years and ended up with someone from high school. If only I knew then what I know now! I wouldnt have it any other way though...maybe life's experiences make us a better mate for each other at this stage in life.

 

[Much2much41]

What if he's BUGLY? You should always remain as selective as you'd be with the men you have always dating. You don't want to date a country bumpkin trailer park trash just for the sake of dating or experimenting with something different. You deserve the best.

I totally agree with the above. I see it all too often (black men marrying white women that white men wouldn't touch, and black women doing the same w/the white men they marry), and I truly don't understand that. I'm not really for interracial dating personally. However, should I date someone outside of my race, he will be held to the same standards I hold black men to: He will be kind, loving, spiritual, smart, well rounded, physically fit, financially secure, and attractive (or at the very least, sexy). I most certainly will not marry a broke, dorky looking, stooped over, sloppy, bifocal and twisted toupee wearing white (or other) man just to say I'm in an interracial relationship. He will have criteria to meet, because more often than not, a white man will marry a dime black, asian, or hispanic woman. Why shouldn't we get the best they have to offer as well?

 

[ChocalateDiva]

A man is a man. I only one" that I discriminate against are the- broke, crazy and married!!

 

[Amber_moon]

For the first few years of my life ALL I dated were white men. I DID NOT LIKE black men. I thought they had too many hangups and issues. I also saw them as all a bunch of low class, club hopping, no job having, baby making blah blah blah blah blah... you know the deal.... and wouldn't touch them.

However, that was until Stephen came into my life. He was the most sensible, intelligent, (real) life loving, and responsible man I have ever known. And he had one thing the white guys I dated didn't.... A good idea of where I came from, and an inherent knowledge of my culture and background. So I married him.

I then realized that my resistance to black men wasn't about THEM.... it was about ME, and my prejudices.

I still love white men. (yes sir-ee bob. They are....well... I like em. thats all Ill say cause I'm a married woman) And I still say YAY! when I see an interracial couple on the streets, but I do have a better appreciation for my black brothers now that I didn't have before.

One thing interracial dating can do that no other kind of relationship can do for someone, is give them a chance to see through someone else's eyes. Hear about diffrent customs and lifestyles that they might not have learned about through dating intheir own race.

But love comes in all colors and shapes and sizes and genders... You just have to be open to see it.

 

[Poli]

A man is a man. I only one" that I discriminate against are the- broke, crazy and married!!

ITA

 

[klb120475]

Yay! By limiting yourself you could be missing on the best thing that has ever come into your life! That is my experience with my husband. I'm sorry but I can't even imagine any other man doing it better than him emotionallly, physically, spiritually, intellectually and I've dated a rainbow of men to compare with.

Too sweet......

 

[mw138]

I'm all for it. My fiance is white and he treats me like a queen.

 

[Naturallong81]

My boyfriend of almost a year is White. I was talking with my Aunt about our relationship and she told me that with her being from the "Old School," this was still newer to her and would take getting used to.
She said she's not opposed to interracial dating or marriage, that you should be with the man or woman who treats you right, makes you happy...the usual.
I see no problem. What are your opinions?

Thats all that really matter. I rether be with a pink man who loves me then settle for someone who doent treat me right because we the same color

 

[Kiadodie]

My ex bf of a year was white. I would and am looking to date out of my race again.

Do you mind if I ask why?

 

[LaNecia]

Do you mind if I ask why?

??????????????????????

 

[Kiadodie]

I believe I am with the Man God made for me. I was 27 when we got married (if anyone ask I am 25 plus tax ) Anyway, I wasn't living under rock if I was meant to be with a brotha I would have been. I think we make a big mistake by trying to limit ourselves to one Group of people. God's plan for you might be an Asian man! Just a thought. I do know I am happily married, my husband and I talk about everything, and oh yeah my husband does the dishes, the laundry, baths the kids, and cooks!!!
My job, be sexy, it's a fulltime position LOL

Girl, you got the job and the type of man I want!

 

[Kiadodie]

??????????????????????

I meant why in the sense of what experiences led her to that?

 

[pisceschica]

I would but I would never date a white guy. The farthest I would go is an arab or middle eastern guy possibly. Since most dominicans have some african ancestry I consider them black and would date them too but thats about it. Not really attracted to any other.

 

[lowridin76]

My boyfriend of 3 years is white. I've ended up dating white men because growing up the only black guys were cousins and relatives. It just kind of stuck I guess, but seriously my boyfriend is great.

 

[blkbeauty]

Excellent Point!!! I was with my black boyfriend for 4 years then my mixed raced boyfriend for 10 years. Both who were wrong for me. They both cheated, verbally abusive and unfortunately made children with the "other woman". My neighbor asked me out oneday, a white neighbor that before never took a second glace at. Not because he isn't attractive, but because I just had in my mind he is White,therefore off limits. I fell in love with him right away and we have been dating happily ever since.

Thats understandable but cn also be debated at the same time. So lets just say hypothetically there was a white guy who lived next door to you your entire life, same neighborhood/upbringing, values, morals...okay cool? And then you meet a black guy who was raised the total opposite of you: Fresh Prince Style...Beverly hills house, prep school, glee club, the whole nine...would you still say the black guy relates to you more just because he is black or no? I believe that relating to someone totally depends on environmental surroundings and circumstances more so than just race alone.

 

[Bublin]

I will never date out of my race - especially not a white man....this includes tanned skinned europeans.

I have strong and so-called controversial reasons for saying this but me nah stray, no way.

In fact let me carry on being my outspoken, controversial self by saying that from now on i won't even step outside of the caribbean.

 

[Kurlee]

I will never date out of my race - especially not a white man....this includes tanned skinned europeans.

I have strong and so-called controversial reasons for saying this but me nah stray, no way.

In fact let me carry on being my outspoken, controversial self by saying that from now on i won't even step outside of the caribbean.

 

[UmSumayyah]

I will never date out of my race - especially not a white man....this includes tanned skinned europeans.

I have strong and so-called controversial reasons for saying this but me nah stray, no way.

In fact let me carry on being my outspoken, controversial self by saying that from now on i won't even step outside of the caribbean.

Move over Kurlee, I need some room to too!

 

[Sui Topi]

Yes! My DH is Filipino and hes really the best man I've ever met. I've been with black and spanish guys and they cannot compare. I was talking to this girl at my old workplace and shes like how only black guys know how to deal with black girls mentally as well as physically..so wrong..its up to individuals just like everything else. One of the black guys I was with reeeeeeally didn't understand how to handle me at all, he was wayy too soft. The next one, waaaaay too cold, spanish guy, same thing, too macho and unfeeling. My man was the right amount of each. Sweet and loving when he needs to be and firm when I'm trying to get away with bs. So in conclusion, find someone who suits you and thats that. (I can say though, I've never found a white guy that I thought was attractive...except for maybe Josh Hartnett..but I don't think I would date him)

 

[LongHairDreams]

I don't know if this has been mentioned but....when a brother sees a sister with a white guy...they flip out. But its alright for them to date out of their race. They don't understand why we're overreacting.

I grew up in a prod white, hispanic area. But, i've always been attracted to black men. Now that im older....everyone is in consideration.

Interractial dating and marriage is very common in my area.

 

[MrsBurns82]

I personally have never been attracted to people of other races, except mexicans but to me they are just light skinned black people, however, I feel its soooo hard to find someone you love and care about that you can stand to be around that feels the same way about you, if you are lucky enough to find it then it should'nt matter if they are black, white, purple or green.

That's funny because my SO is puerto rican and he says all the time that we don't count as an interracial relationship because puerto ricans are blacks red head step child.

 

[drasgrl]

People are people so it's all good.

 

[Lebiya]

Hey, if he has all of the above why not

 

[Desert Skye]

I'm all for interracial marriages, shoot I'mma product of one.

 

[Pookie25]

I chose indifferant because, I personally will never date outside my race because I feel that we (me and a white man) will NEVER have anything in common, and I am very PRO BLACK. However, my mom, has dated a white man for five years and they are perfect for each other and he makes her happy, so I do believe interracial relationship can work for some people. But not for me.