Thread for the heartbroken

Once again I feel like I am in another failed relationship. I know it's probably time to walk away. The guys is nice,but it's just it is not working.
I get sad because I look at my best friend and her girlfriend. How they are so happy, and lovey dovey when we are out. How my best friend buys her stuff and takes care of her and vice versa. How my best friend is about to make her, her wife. And I want that for myself, and I wonder how come it's so hard to get that for myself....
 
So for the past two weeks we've been doing the "Okay let's see if we can get things back on track because neither of us really wants to lose this friendship" thing but today I think we both just gave up. We're better off leaving each other alone for a while. I think it would be so much easier if he would just let me be mad or to see him as the villain in all this since he walked away first. Instead over the past two weeks I've gotten texts saying things like "You have my heart more than you realize" and "You eventually became my light, I don't think I'll ever find a love as pure as yours." Last week when he came to pick up some things he hid a note in my stuff that said "I love you." Today he told me "No matter what I do I feel like I can't make you happy anymore." So now I'm thinking maybe I was the bad guy all along. It's so crazy to me that less than a month ago we were completely fine and that now I may have lost my best friend for good.
 
Bunnyhaslonghair said:
Today is a sad one. Even people at work asked me if I was ok. Smh.
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Oh dear, I've been there. It will WILL get better. Stay around people although you don't feel like it, your energy/vibrations are low drink water and know that God is closest to the broken hearted. He hears every tear. Cry out to him and hang in there.

Dear Lord,

I pray for my sister today, Father look upon her through eyes of compassion and have mercy on her. Help Lord! Lift up her hung down head and strength her feeble knees. Lord fill her with joy and give her a peace concerning this situation like only you can. Give your mighty angels a charge to watch over and keep her. We call you the Healer we call you right now and ask that you would heal not only her broken heart but every broken heart in this thread. Heal memories God, right wrongs, and Father bring right men across their paths when they are ready for relationship again. Now Lord I believe you heard this pray and that you have already answered. Thank you Father. Amen.
 
sarumoki said:
So for the past two weeks we've been doing the "Okay let's see if we can get things back on track because neither of us really wants to lose this friendship" thing but today I think we both just gave up. We're better off leaving each other alone for a while. I think it would be so much easier if he would just let me be mad or to see him as the villain in all this since he walked away first. Instead over the past two weeks I've gotten texts saying things like "You have my heart more than you realize" and "You eventually became my light, I don't think I'll ever find a love as pure as yours." Last week when he came to pick up some things he hid a note in my stuff that said "I love you." Today he told me "No matter what I do I feel like I can't make you happy anymore." So now I'm thinking maybe I was the bad guy all along. It's so crazy to me that less than a month ago we were completely fine and that now I may have lost my best friend for good.
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Don't fall for it. It's just a tactic to break you down and make you feel guilty. Be strong and keep your distance from him.
 
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gn1g said:
Oh dear, I've been there. It will WILL get better. Stay around people although you don't feel like it, your energy/vibrations are low drink water and know that God is closest to the broken hearted. He hears every tear. Cry out to him and hang in there.

Dear Lord,

I pray for my sister today, Father look upon her through eyes of compassion and have mercy on her. Help Lord! Lift up her hung down head and strength her feeble knees. Lord fill her with joy and give her a peace concerning this situation like only you can. Give your mighty angels a charge to watch over and keep her. We call you the Healer we call you right now and ask that you would heal not only her broken heart but every broken heart in this thread. Heal memories God, right wrongs, and Father bring right men across their paths when they are ready for relationship again. Now Lord I believe you heard this pray and that you have already answered. Thank you Father. Amen.
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Thanks you! I've been feeling pretty good today. Your prayer means so much to me! Thank you :bighug:
 
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It's over. I called off work today just to lay around in my pajamas and cry.

I didn't know I could feel pain like this.

I am a single mom again. 2 kids with different father's. never even married. I feel like an idiot. like I failed life.

I will never date or talk to a man again. This is a sign I need to learn to be with myself for good.
 
juliansmom said:
It's over. I called off work today just to lay around in my pajamas and cry.

I didn't know I could feel pain like this.

I am a single mom again. 2 kids with different father's. never even married. I feel like an idiot. like I failed life.

I will never date or talk to a man again. This is a sign I need to learn to be with myself for good.
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You are not stupid. You made a mistake. It's ok. Love yourself, forgive yourself, and heal. Learn what it is you need to learn about yourself, the world, and men. You will be okay. (((Hugs)))
 
juliansmom said:
It's over. I called off work today just to lay around in my pajamas and cry.

I didn't know I could feel pain like this.

I am a single mom again. 2 kids with different father's. never even married. I feel like an idiot. like I failed life.

I will never date or talk to a man again. This is a sign I need to learn to be with myself for good.
Click to expand...

Get up put some music on and breathe some fresh air! You've got to come up out of that slump, your best days are ahead of you! What's coming is sooooooo much better than what's been. I know it hurts but it is only for a little while, this too will pass. go on thru the pain but don't miss your paper $$ and for heaven sake don't wallow around in it.

Praying for you @juliansmom
 
It's been weeks and I'm still not over things. I spend so much time just laying in bed at night thinking about him, along with the good, the bad and the ugly.

Just when it seems like I am emotionally healing, something happens to drag me back down into a depressive state. A few weekends ago I redecorated my home, and it felt so good. It was the happiest I had been in awhile and felt like a great start to a new chapter. A few days later, my ex showed up to my house unannounced to grab some things. The second I closed the door when he left, I broke down crying. The entire next day I cried and felt so much pain from seeing him again. He kept saying, "no hard feelings, I only want the best for you, etc." I was so shocked to see him that I could barely speak. I was numb. It hurt so bad. I just feel like I'm never going to move on from this and I really want to. The entire time that he was around, I was just screaming in my head, "why don't you love me? Why don't you want me? Why am I not good enough for you?"
 
@BlueEra (((hugs)))
You are good enough. As time passes you'll come to realize he was probably the one who was not good enough for you. He had no business showing up to your house unannounced. That was rude and very entitled behavior. He couldn't call first? You deserved that consideration. Take really good care of you.
 
Thanks @hopeful, and you're right, he is extremely entitled and that is typical of him. He could've easily called but he chose to catch me off guard. He also made it seem like he had no ill will toward me and like he was the victim, as if I was the one who just kicked him to the curb and abandoned him when it was vice versa.

On the bright side, every time I think of him now and how much I "miss" him, I think of all of the bad things he did to me and how much he hurt me and that helps me to get over it.
 
So I went to work yesterday and everything went smoothly..or so I thought. This morning I get to work feeling kind of down..as soon as I get in the break room one of my friends from work is all over me..he kept asking what's up with me and why did I only speak 3 sentences yesterday. I kept trying to play it off like everything was good and that I was fine. So break time comes and I am picking at my trail mix (haven't had an appetite since my relationship went downhill months ago). He asked me why I'm not eating more..then says something along the lines of I hope that guy isn't stressing you out. As soon as I heard those words I started balling..I excused myself and cried in the bathroom. Finally like 20 minutes later I compose myself enough to leave but my supervisor spots me and starts asking if I am okay. I start balling again..I tell her what's going on. How I had to pack me and my kids things and move back into my mother's house. She tells me to go home and rest and cry and just take another day off for myself. I laid around..watched youtube videos on letting go and moving on. Wrote my goals in my journal. Fell asleep..then woke up to a text from my ex asking how my day was..smh. I told him not to text me anymore unless it had to do with the kids. Now here I am again..just feeling empty. I hate this.
 
(((@juliansmom)))
One day at a time, okay? And I'm glad you shared what was going on with the two people at work. You deserve some love, compassion, and support. You don't have to get through this alone. And your ex is a jerk:yep:, he's manipulative. The more practice you get at blowing him off, the easier it will get.
 
hopeful said:
(((@juliansmom)))
One day at a time, okay? And I'm glad you shared what was going on with the two people at work. You deserve some love, compassion, and support. You don't have to get through this alone. And your ex is a jerk:yep:, he's manipulative. The more practice you get at blowing him off, the easier it will get.
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It did feel good to talk about it. I don't really have a lot of friends..the only people that knew we even broke up are my mom and dad. But I am glad I opened up today..it made me feel a little better.

I am just embarrassed honestly..that I even put myself in this position
 
I feel somewhat better today. I thought about how I was never really that happy because I felt like he tried to change me the entire relationship. I always felt something was missing and never really felt content in that relationship. It still hurts that it's over..but I think I started to wonder if he was right for me. But I didn't want to admit it..especially after becoming pregnant.
 
Well, I'm 100% over it!

:dance7:

Sometimes it's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel when the wounds are fresh, but we have to remind ourselves that with time, we always move on. It feels so good to be free!

I do get lonely sometimes but I'm starting to focus on other things-- mainly career development and possible relocation... again.
 
juliansmom said:
It's over. I called off work today just to lay around in my pajamas and cry.

I didn't know I could feel pain like this.

I am a single mom again. 2 kids with different father's. never even married. I feel like an idiot. like I failed life.

I will never date or talk to a man again. This is a sign I need to learn to be with myself for good.
Click to expand...

Plenty of women have been in your situation and end up finding love. Never give up hope. Ciara had a baby with FUTURE of all people and ended up finding a prince. The world doubted her but that didn't stop a good man from falling madly in love with her and making her his queen.
 
Today was a better day for me. I feel somewhat at peace. I no longer feel like the world is over..but I did feel pretty lonely yesterday. The days my kids are gone I experience alot of emptiness. I'm just not used to being alone so much...

I used to LOVE my alone time..

but now that I'm single it just feels so weird..so empty..

Hopefully this is remedied by starting school again..but I don't start until Janurary..in the mean time I think I am going to join a new gym..I had to cancel my old membership because me and my ex went to the same gym and worked out together..

I just need to find things to do to keep my mind off of this loneliness feeling..
 
ArcticFemme said:
Plenty of women have been in your situation and end up finding love. Never give up hope. Ciara had a baby with FUTURE of all people and ended up finding a prince. The world doubted her but that didn't stop a good man from falling madly in love with her and making her his queen.
Click to expand...

I hope one day I do. Right now I just feel so broken and not good enough..
 
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