it_comes_naturally
Well-Known Member
If you're going to make me cry, at least be there to wipe away the tears.
I have NO idea what happened. None. And it's really bothering me.
You probably don't want to hear this right now, but here's what happened.
Nothing.
I've learned to take absolutely nothing from initial chemistry and a good first date. I have no idea what is going through these men's heads when they meet me and hang out with me, and therefore, I have no expectations when we finally go out.
He could have told me it was the best date he ever had, but unless he calls me again for another one, all that means nothing.
That's all a part of dating today. I can totally understand being hurt, frustrated and disappointed -- shoot, I've been plenty of times -- but in the beginning, these men owe me nothing.
They can decide they're not interested in me after one date and I can do the same. I certainly have brushed off a man or two after one date with no explanation, no returned phone call and no text.
All that being said, I think this guy did the right thing really by not leading you on and making you expect more. It sucks when you have high hopes, but it's better for him to disappear now instead of stick around and lead you on.
It just is what it is...
Ok, this is all well and fine but don't sit there and ask me if I wanna see again if you know that's not what you want. Don't sit there and say "we'll have to do it again soon" if that's not what you want. He's the one texting me every morning, not the other way around. If he had decided after we went out that he wasn't really feeling me as much as he thought, I've given him ample opportunity to be honest with me about it. But hey, maybe his lack of response to my last text is his effed up way of finally saying he's not interested.
In either case, I'm all set with all of them and their bull****.
I agree with Bunny....I always do, LOL. But like she said nothing happened. And men aren't going to usually be straight with you. When I get the generic "we'll have to do it again soon", that's code for, "If I absolutely have nothing else to do, even a month from now, then I may call you, but not really interested enough to make a second date." It's just a nice way to end a night without looking like a complete jerk. Most people are not bold enough to tell you they're not feeling you. Especially men. I've yet to have one actually tell me that after a date...most just dropped off the face of the Earth. That used to BURN me up because I felt like you do, but now,that's fine. It's time I didn't waste with him stringing me along thinking we're doing something when all along he had no good intentions toward me anyway.
Sometimes online situations are hard. My current SO I met online and I've met/dated quite a few guys from online. Some worked out, most didn't. Oh well...
Someone suggested a read on here a long time ago, "Why Men Marry Some and Not Others"...I think that's the name of the book. I have it and it has served me well as sort of an insight into a man's behaviors.
I'll PM you...what it brought out in the book. This post already too long, LOL>
Ok, this is all well and fine but don't sit there and ask me if I wanna see again if you know that's not what you want. Don't sit there and say "we'll have to do it again soon" if that's not what you want. He's the one texting me every morning, not the other way around. If he had decided after we went out that he wasn't really feeling me as much as he thought, I've given him ample opportunity to be honest with me about it. But hey, maybe his lack of response to my last text is his effed up way of finally saying he's not interested.
In either case, I'm all set with all of them and their bull****.
MzLady try to stay optimistic and not throw the towel in yet. Your part of the country is a challenge for dating. I know that all too well. Lived there for most of my entire life. You are smart, pretty and seem like a real gem.
Maybe it's time to move and open yourself up to some new experiences with some new people. Hoping things turn around for you this year