***Random Thoughts: RELATIONSHIP FORUM***

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Met JD today and filled him in on who my ex was. He knows who he is but they don't hang in the same circle or communicate with each other. I don't know why it bothered me so much to tell him this so early but I'd rather him hear it from me than some scalawag repeating made up stories from the ex about how horrible I am. Humph.
 
texasqt said:
Just give it to him! Lol!
You can easily say, 'hey I have to go but let's finish this conversation on the phone." He's probably trying to feel you out. Help a brother out!

Is he single?
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Yeah, imma just go for it...(don't want to be embarrassed and he say HAYLE NAW! I don't want your number!) :lachen::lachen::lachen::lachen::lachen::lachen:
 
I think I just realized why I'm so annoyed....

I haven't been kissed by a guy I've gone on a date with in 4 years. And that guy who kissed me tricked me into looking at something in the trees, and when I turned around, there were lips on mine. I didn't want a kiss like that to happen....

So... I'm annoyed about last week's kiss. I'm very conservative about dating. I've gone on dates with several different men this year and didn't kiss them on the first date.

I don't know how I'm going to manage in the modern world of dating. If I can't let a guy kiss me and be annoyed about it later, I can't take chances at all, can I? I'm very big on protecting my feelings. I'm tired of being hurt.
 
I think I'd like to have a go at vetting this guy. After he mentioned in casual conversation that he doesn't want to live in the Bible Belt (read: the South), I was kind of turned off, but now I think I may have reacted hastily. We have some core things in common, especially both being homeschooled and he seems very honorable, gentlemanly, and fun-loving but responsible, all of which I'm looking for in a guy. This should be interesting.
 
I ordered the kindle version of the book Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl (baggage reclaim) and that is a great read. I order it yesterday and it has been hard not to put it down. I love Natalie's website so I had to get the book.

It definitely reinforces the realities that I had to face about myself. It actually quite humbling but refreshing bc I will not make decisions that are detrimental to myself worth bc of the lessons that I have learned.
 
A week and a half ago I received a holiday card from this guy I talked to briefly from OKC. I mentioned that on here. Before I received this card saying that he was thinking about me and that he thought the holidays was the perfect excuse to reach out, I hadn't talked to him in maybe... a month and a half?

So, I emailed him back and thanked him for the card, said it was really sweet, yada yada, and I said that I'll be in NY for NYE (he lives there), and if he's around, we should grab coffee.

I never heard back:lol: SMH. I didn't, and still don't, think anything of me suggesting to meet up. What I think it is is that he sent me the card from his work email. Watch him be in NC where his family lives and not having even read my reply or something like that. That's one of the reasons I stopped responding. I didn't like that he insisted on communicating via work email, and I think that had to do with the fact that I said I wasn't ready to exchange numbers... kinda like he was getting back at me or something:lol::nono:
But anyway, it's hard to really be yourself via email when you know that some Fortune 500 company's IT team monitors everything you say.

Anyway, too bad, so sad, young man. I'll see if he responds after the holidays. SMH.
 
On another note, the guy whom I told not to call me "hun," and who initially did not seem to take it too well, is now texting me again. He's a former intern of my current organization, and when I met him, we talked extensively about the people he knows from here, etc. etc.

Everyone in the group shared our phone numbers electronically, and since then, he occasionally texts me. The first time, I was like um?? I shared my # for professional reasons, NOT to communicate with you privately.

Anyway, yesterday, he texts me asking if my office was open. When I told him yes, he said he would try to stop by (he knows several people from here, given his internship a few years back). I said OK. He didn't come, of course...:rolleyes: citing that he felt too lazy to drive at here. I'm like: No worries...:rolleyes:

Then today, he texts me again saying he's feeling too lazy to come by today too:lol: Really, young man, I don't particularly care if you stop by or no.

Now he's texting me asking how things are going, what my plans are, etc. Am I to believe that this is innocent? I've only met you once lol.

He, the guy in my previous post, Nick from the "Nick and Selita" saga, and the last jerk I liked and dated, all attended the same college. As far as I know, the guy in my previous post does not know them. I don't need all these links:nono:
 
^^^I just did for one and I feel soooooo much better. All that pressure to remain friends is for the birds.

I'm sure you're talking about a specific situation, though.
 
nicola.kirwan said:
^^^I just did for one and I feel soooooo much better. All that pressure to remain friends is for the birds.

I'm sure you're talking about a specific situation, though.
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I never feel pressure to do anything but what I plan/intend on doing so it's easy for me to separate feelings. When I'm done emotionally or decide I don't like you anymore, I'm done. You can hang around if you want to. lol

I always see people and exes along the lines of "you never know when you might need them." I've benefited tremendously from this over the years so it works for me.
 
barbiesocialite said:
I never feel pressure to do anything but what I plan/intend on doing so it's easy for me to separate feelings. When I'm done emotionally or decide I don't like you anymore, I'm done. You can hang around if you want to. lol

I always see people and exes along the lines of "you never know when you might need them." I've benefited tremendously from this over the years so it works for me.
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I was thinking of posting something yesterday but was unsure. But I'll give it a go and see what feedback I get. There was someone I went on a date with almost exactly a year ago. It was the loveliest date ever. Very simple, but I was very very impressed with his approach. I felt great with him. Nevertheless, he was too old for me and I didn't appreciate that he had lied to me twice in the span of two hours about his age (and I don't think I ever got his true age), and also didn't appreciate that he initially gave me a fake name. He told me the truth when he gave me his card.

Anyway, he works for a company in an industry I'd love to get into. At the time he said he'd help me. Well, when I broke things off I told him he was great but that it really was the age thing (and also the lying thing...though I see why he did it). He seemed really disappointed and we haven't spoken since. I'm applying to that company and I still have his card. We didn't end on bad terms but we're not friends either. I'm tempted to reach out to him, but don't know what the etiquette is here. His offer to help seemed sincere, but it could have also purely been game.

Should I try to get in touch again or leave it be? I wonder if it would come with some expectations on his part.
 
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nicola.kirwan said:
I was thinking of posting something yesterday but was unsure. But I'll give it a go and see what feedback I get. There was someone I went on a date with almost exactly a year ago. It was the loveliest date ever. Very simple, but I was very very impressed with his approach. I felt great with him. Nevertheless, he was too old for me and I didn't appreciate that he had lied to me twice in the span of two hours about his age (and I don't think I ever got his true age), and also didn't appreciate that he initially gave me a fake name. He told me the truth when he gave me his card.

Anyway, he works for a company in an industry I'd love to get into. At the time he said he'd help me. Well, when I broke things off I told him he was great but that it really was the age thing (and also the lying thing...though I see why he did it). He seemed really disappointed and we haven't spoken since. I'm applying to that company and I still have his card. We didn't end on bad terms but we're not friends either. I'm tempted to reach out to him, but don't know what the etiquette is here. His offer to help seemed sincere, but it could have also purely been game.

Should I try to get in touch again or leave it be? I wonder if it would come with some expectations on his part.
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It could also backfire and he may block you from getting the job OR help you get it and then act like you owe him for it like you said. I'd say get the job on your own merits or use someone else to help. I hate to imagine what his professional behavior is like if he couldn't be honest about his age. He may not be 'The Guy' at work and then you'd be associated with someone who is questionable. The older man I dated that lied about his age never stopped lying. Just my 2 pennies.
 
I'm in Europe for another week and SO isn't handling it well. He says he misses more than he thought he would. :sad: I, on the other hand, am fine. Nice that the tables have turned for a bit.
 
texasqt said:
It could also backfire and he may block you from getting the job OR help you get it and then act like you owe him for it like you said. I'd say get the job on your own merits or use someone else to help. I hate to imagine what his professional behavior is like if he couldn't be honest about his age. He may not be 'The Guy' at work and then you'd be associated with someone who is questionable. The older man I dated that lied about his age never stopped lying. Just my 2 pennies.
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2nding that. I think it's on point advice.
 
texasqt said:
It could also backfire and he may block you from getting the job OR help you get it and then act like you owe him for it like you said. I'd say get the job on your own merits or use someone else to help. I hate to imagine what his professional behavior is like if he couldn't be honest about his age. He may not be 'The Guy' at work and then you'd be associated with someone who is questionable. The older man I dated that lied about his age never stopped lying. Just my 2 pennies.
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HauteHippie said:
2nding that. I think it's on point advice.
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I agree. I had already submitted the application and everything, so nothing was going to be contingent on him. More like a reference, but I don't want to deal with the potential negatives.
 
How do you send me a friend request and your profile pic is of a child with the middle finger raised. I already know your butt aint my type of people.
 
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This dude my friend is interested in just messaged me that he thinks Im hot and he wants to take me out and please dont tell my friend. Im SO pissed! Im going to tell my friend but she's so emotional over this guy and already losing sleep and stressed out of her mind. I actually am stumped here.
 
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