Christmas party with the crush. This may be a facing reality moment. It's weird that he's so personable but it seems like he doesn't know how to act with women. I mean, he does, because when he approached me he was very confident and it made me want him. A lot. But it's like he's too confident or something. I'm often attracted to men that seem like they don't like women (not in a homosexual way, but like they'll like me but I don't know why because it seems like they don't like to talk to me or whatever. My last serious boyfriend would literally make a face when I talked sometimes. But he treated me well on paper and always asked me out so I thought maybe I was imagining things. I could literally see him brushing off what I said. He would literally do this thing where he shook his head, sort of shrugged his shoulders, and exhaled. I do an excellent impression of it
) so maybe that's what I'm doing again.
I was enjoying it because he was very attentive, like I've posted about him before. But I swear he rolled his eyes at me a couple of times. The first time I thought I was imagining things--I overthink everything so I ignored it. Plus, I make facial expressions based on what's going on in my head and people misread me--thinking I'm being rude and I'm not, so I thought maybe that's what I was doing with him. But I called him on it the second time I noticed it and I didn't like his reaction. He had asked if I wanted him to get me a drink. I said no at first but later, after a friend got there, I asked him to get me one--I could have gotten it myself but I was trying to be flirty/pay attention to him because my friend had arrived. He asked what I wanted and I said I didn't know. See....I understand how he thought I was going to know what I wanted and just name a drink, but what
I expected was a suggestion or a lighthearted response--he had a drink so I expected a suggestion OR I was going to name a drink after I thought about it. He sort of rolled his eyes and said "Am I a mindreader?
" Um.
So I was like, with a smile--half jokingly but lightheartedly serious--"
Did you just roll your eyes at me?
What was that?
" And instead of being like "oh, babe, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like THAT, [yada, yada, yada]" like I was expecting, he was like "Because! I can't read your mind" or something like that. I stopped listening after "because" because....you just indignantly admitted that you rolled your damn eyes at me. Whattt?
I'll be disappointed if after all this I can't have his babies (hahaha. I'm just joking....sort of
) because he's a jerk. I think maybe now's a stressful time for him so I could have excused a little anxiety on his part but when I asked about it in a fun way and he was like "Because!" I felt like...Oh, okay
On a plus side, I got chatted up by several other young men last night, so that made me feel good, at least (it's been awhile since that's happened).
(That's unrelated to the eye rolling. I invited a friend and when she showed up the guy and I kinda of split up to mingle.)
But back to the alleged crush. I kind of don't know what to do with him now. It's like he doesn't know how to talk to me. Which is weird because he knows how to talk to people. He doesn't see anything wrong with not smiling all in my face. Actually, he usually does smile all in my face. Which is why I was caught offguard by the eyerolling. IDK if I'm making too much of it or if I should take this as a sign to leave him alone. Or maybe I romanticized the idea of him too much and this isn't as big a deal as I'm making it, and I'm just seeing the real him? IDK. He rolled his eyes at me
nono:
he was asking too many (seemingly innocent) questions. 
I don't even know. It makes me feel REALLY weird when his former classmates/acquaintances show interest
erplexed so, what's he want now!? I'ma have to be real short and terse with this one.
