My ex...
Yesterday, he sent a couple of texts, and he eventually asked me what happened to some recipes that I'd promised to get from my mother. This promise is over a year old...
I said I'd completely forgotten abt that and don't remember the recipe at all. He starts lamenting that I'd promised a lot of other recipes and never sent them. So, I said: fine, I'll get it for you if you get me such-and-such recipe from YOUR mother.
Then some floodgates opened. He said that he doesn't understand what's with me and this 'i only do something for you if you do something for me' attitude, and that's not how he operates with people he considers to be friends.
I'm thinking WTH, where is this coming from... So I ask him if he can explain. He tells me that he doesn't find me to be particularly generous or giving, especially with him... And that he's always felt that way, and that we've talked abt this before.
Really, dude? We've been broken il for over a year now, and I haven't had any such relationship-based conversations with you since June. What's your deal now.
I respond that despite the fact that we broke up, I've been quite generous toward him. I've shared recipes, given him things my mother used to send him (bless her heart... Glad she's let him go), etc. I'm like: I guess you don't consider that to be generous.
He then apologizes, talking abt he blanked out on those things I mentioned.
That ingrate...
some days I have so much disdain for him...
I said in one of my texts that we'd established that we have different love languages... While I like little gifts here and there (which he was good at), I appreciate much more someone who genuinely RESPECTS me, and who doesn't spend YEARS lying to me and deceiving me just so he could be with me.
I appreciate little gifts a lot less than I do the autonomy to make my own damn emotional decisions without consistently being given half-truths to influence my decision-making.
My friend recently pointed out a post I made on the first page of this thread abt feeling annoyed and resentful toward him... in 2009!!! An entire year before I broke up with him... This nagging feeling that I was being manipulated... And then to discover that it was soooooooo much worse than I could have ever imagined.
The last straw for me was his last overt attempt at manipulating me yet again... Giving me half-truths to not upset me (his words) and get me to consider getting back with him. Hell.to.the.effin.NO.
NEVER. That door has been sealed SHUT.