Is dating a white man a "step up"?

[carcajada]

Nothing like a black man, for me. Different parts of Texas have different views. How people feel in Houston is definitely not the same as out in the country. It doesn't matter as long as my man is milk chocolate, I don't care about anyone else's.

 

[longhairgoal]

the rednecks around here seem to have a problem with it. I've lived in 6 states since I've been married. Kansas, Texas, Florida, Maryland, South Carolina and Virginia and the Virginians seem to have the biggest problem with it. Must be the whole heart of the confederacy thing. But in general I think most people see it as a man is a man.

Really? I'm originally from Northern VA, and there was nothing there but interracial couples. I will say, though, that it depends on the part of VA you're in. I live further south now. My boyfriend is white. No one cares. lol

 

[InNeedofHairapy]

If the man before the white man was a "down-low" brother with a peg leg and an angry parrot on his shoulder who screamed "Arrghh Matey" when he was making love...then yes...I guess the white man is a step up.

I mean really...I answered no, I like women...but that's not true either...

 

[Ms Red]

Ooohh InNeedofHairapy, you are on a rizoll lol

If the man before the white man was a "down-low" brother with a peg leg and an angry parrot on his shoulder who screamed "Arrghh Matey" when he was making love...then yes...I guess the white man is a step up.

I mean really...I answered no, I like women...but that's not true either...

 

[UmSumayyah]

sistas are a step up for any man, aint nothing like a strong, sexy sista. white women are too unchallenging.

HA! I know some men (black and white) who would disagree with you.

 

[MochaSilk]

I haven't read all the replies, but here's the mindset I grew up with...

It's not steppin' up or down, dating black or white.
Dating a GOOD man is a step in the right direction.

 

[Lebiya]

Its not about race. It’s about ambition and decency. I think it’s a step up for any woman how has a man with those qualities- Especially if the ones before were all losers

 

[Miss*Tress]

Depends on your starting point I guess.

 

[thefineprint]

i absolute love my fiance, who is white. step up, down, sideways or diagonal - i don't really care. our relationship is rock solid and that is all that matters to me. other people can see it how they want to see it.

 

[PrincessScorpion]

Girl, you're not lying...any man is a step up when keep digging for diamonds and keep coming up with coal.

Coal or either it's fruit cake



The step up is finding a straight man regardless of color! period!

 

[envybeauty]

wow.

i'd also like to add that some people reallyinternalize the "step up" mentality. they see whiteness-white communities, white schools, white people as free from the stresses and realities of black life; things are perceived as "easier". white people dont have to worry about the social repercussions that come with being born "themselves". whiteness still means ease and freedom in more senses than one. to be accepted by "whiteness" in terms of dating, beauty standards or social setting can create a deep internal sense of relief and greater cultural agency.

pulling out some masters degree theories on ya. . .

In my experience in NY, some White communities are safer than some Black communities. I have lived in both Black and White communities (Westchester and Jamaica) Black on Black crime is alive and real people.

DISCLAIMER: Not all communities ....but some.......

 

[Namilani]

Sorry, but I can't put down my race by saying a white man is better . I mean, what if I date Jim-Bob from Lot 345??!! Is he still better?? And I haven't been attracted to white "men" since second grade... He didn't count, though, cuz he was fine (darker complexion, pretty eyes, nice hair...) and wore urban namebrands !

 

[NewYorkgyrl]

In my experience in NY, some White communities are safer than some Black communities. I have lived in both Black and White communities (Westchester and Jamaica) Black on Black crime is alive and real people.

DISCLAIMER: Not all communities ....but some.......

You must have been in UPPER Westchester.

Don't get in twisted lower Westchester gets gansta too. Yonkers is only like 10 mintues from the Bronx. Mt. Vernon....let's just say they call it "Murda"ville.

 

[firecracker]

All shiznit this **** thread is baaaacccck! Proceed!

 

[firecracker]

In my experience in NY, some White communities are safer than some Black communities. I have lived in both Black and White communities (Westchester and Jamaica) Black on Black crime is alive and real people.

DISCLAIMER: Not all communities ....but some.......

You ain't neva lied.
Well hell you can get better customer service alot of times outside the black community.

 

[snugglez41685]

You must have been in UPPER Westchester.

Don't get in twisted lower Westchester gets gansta too. Yonkers is only like 10 mintues from the Bronx. Mt. Vernon....let's just say they call it "Murda"ville.

BORN AND RAISED(Where I spend most of my days) IN MURDAVILLE!!! RESIDING IN YO(YONKERS)!!! It ain't no joke in the "ville".Or YO. I've always seen some hood,and I ain't hood myself,just street smart.I walk out my House to go to work like this sometimes(I work overnights).

 

[firecracker]

BORN AND RAISED(Where I spend most of my days) IN MURDAVILLE!!! RESIDING IN YO(YONKERS)!!! It ain't no joke in the "ville".Or YO. I've always seen some hood . I walk out my House to go to work like this sometimes(I work overnights).

Thank goodness I stayed way up on Warburton/Greystone Station when I did live in the YO! I was a 15 minute walk away from Downtown Hastings. Down that Warburton hill in the heart of The Yo was no joke.

 

[snugglez41685]

Thank goodness I stayed way up on Warburton/Greystone Station when I did live in the YO! I was a 15 minute walk away from Downtown Hastings. Down that Warburton hill in the heart of The Yo was no joke.

You ain't never lied! and I'm pretty fresh to Yonkers! i can't waitto save enough to get the heck outtaa here!

 

[snugglez41685]

In my experience in NY, some White communities are safer than some Black communities. I have lived in both Black and White communities (Westchester and Jamaica) Black on Black crime is alive and real people.

DISCLAIMER: Not all communities ....but some.......

I too beleive this.

 

[firecracker]

You ain't never lied! and I'm pretty fresh to Yonkers! i can't waitto save enough to get the heck outtaa here!

I can understand. Is Riverdale still cool?

 

[snugglez41685]

I can understand. Is Riverdale still cool?

It's ok, people I know say it's better than it used to be. They're starting to build up downtown by GettySquare and all. The riverside is really nice. I aactually have pics from thee Riverside.

 

[Hidden_Angel]

i dunn white woman tend to look alike to me.. thats why iim not to suprised when white men want latin or black woman..

 

[Social.Buttahfly]

I think any man can be seen as a step up, all depends on who he's being compared to. I do think there has to be some tangible criteria, and skin color doesn't fit the bill. If a new guy is more financially successful than previous boyfriends for example, some may see that as a step up, but being white doesnt stop the guy being a bum. last time i checked there were lots of broke white people all over the place so i'm not too sure about that "rich white man" theory either.

Thank you, it sounds ridiculous, a man is a man.

I'm disturbed 28 people voted, "Yay, they got that paper"

People must not get out much if in this day and age people think only white men have money, I mean really. I have never had a problem meeting black men as financially well off as white men so I cannot relate to this "step up". Seeing as I do not look at financial stability as my first criteria, no man is a step up, as I do quite well on my own .

 

[facets]

Thank you, it sounds ridiculous, a man is a man.

I'm disturbed 28 people voted, "Yay, they got that paper"

People must not get out much if in this day and age people think only white men have money, I mean really. I have never had a problem meeting black men as financially well off as white men so I cannot relate to this "step up". Seeing as I do not look at financial stability as my first criteria, no man is a step up, as I do quite well on my own .

That's like the time I was out @ the park with my family and some loser yelled out to me... "Yeeeehh, you like dat money don't cha?" I was like

Of course, AA people can't have their own $$$. We must hook-up with Euros to get some. What's sad is that this was an AA guy yelling this mess out. He should have been somewhere trying to make a plan to get his own ish together instead of harrassing ppl out w/ their kids in the park.erplexed

 

[Glib Gurl]

I just came across a video on youtube that discusses the black woman/white man dynamic -- really interesting:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TT1NFR4LsY4

 

[facets]

cool vid!! wish it were a bit longer

 

[firecracker]

erplexed Claude Hawmercy when da helz is this damn thread gon die! Their just men no matter what the color goshdarnit! I'm coming Elizabeth I'm coming!

 

[JLove74]

erplexed Claude Hawmercy when da helz is this damn thread gon die! Their just men no matter what the color goshdarnit! I'm coming Elizabeth I'm coming!

Hold on Fred G. Sanford, I'm coming to join you and Elizabeth..... This is the NEVER ENDING thread.....****, ****, **** make it stop

 

[Shardonay11]

I think that the reason why the white men that you hang out with comment on the black male, white woman thing, is because they can even see how beauiful the black women is and they typically don't understand why our men treat us so bad. I Heard this out of the mouth of the plenty of white men.

We have been there fantasy forever. ever since slavery time white men prefered us over there own women. There are just well trained, ever been walking down the street looking pretty and a white man and his girl are walking towards you. She immediately looks to see if he's looking and he's usually turned the other way completly with a really funny looking face on.

 

[cocoberry10]

I think that the reason why the white men that you hang out with comment on the black male, white woman thing, is because they can even see how beauiful the black women is and they typically don't understand why our men treat us so bad. I Heard this out of the mouth of the plenty of white men.

We have been there fantasy forever. ever since slavery time white men prefered us over there own women. There are just well trained, ever been walking down the street looking pretty and a white man and his girl are walking towards you. She immediately looks to see if he's looking and he's usually turned the other way completly with a really funny looking face on.

What an interesting way to look at this. I’ve never thought of it this way, but it makes a lot of sense!