Everything was cool until he____(fill in the blank)

Until he told me he wanted to have a 3some with a tranny so we can have the best of both worlds....


Til he stuck his finger in a forbidden place without asking

Til he said he was going to wash up before sex and walked out closing the door. I walked out a minute later to see he was spraying his meat with water he used to iron his clothes.

Til he broke up with me, got back with me, I dumped him and then he called me over 170 times in 2 hours on my phone, my parents house phone and my sisters phone crying and begging to get back together only to dump me.....


Til he tried to tell me I was his girlfriend although he never picked up the phone when I called and paid more attention to me when I was breaking up with my 3some boyfriend....

Til he begged incessantly that he would do ANYTHING he needed to get in bed with me because my butt drove him crazy


 
TheLaurynDoll said:
- Til he stuck his tongue up my nose and grabbed a booger... licked my armpits... and called me his prince charming with rabbit teeth.

- Til I saw his crusty feet which he justified with "I never take my socks off"

- Til we took a shower twice and I still smelled his butt...
Click to expand...

ROOLLLLLIIIIIINNNNGGGGGG!
 
Guy A-Wanted me to come meet his mother and sister after having had less than 15
minutes of conversation with me, and not even a first date.
-Called me 10 times in one afternoon because I didn't return his call, while I was
at church.
-When I mentioned that I needed to buy a new phone, he wanted me to explain
why I hadn't asked him to buy one for me...after we just met.
-Drunk dialed me saying how he couldn't stop thinking about me
-When I realized I was afraid that he'd show up at my apartment.
-Thought I was being overly sensitive when I implied that he was exhibiting stalker-
like qualities.

Guy B-Bragged about how drunk he got for the 4th of July, and then when I wasn't impressed, made up a story about his brother spiking his drink.
 
Wow. These make me want to make up with my ex. He doesn't seem so bad after this...

I laughed and i was appalled at these
 
Caramel_Diva said:
* told me he was a former underwear model and that they called him a large animal...and asked why I thought they did that?

* Asked what was my favortie feature about myself....I said something like my eyes...and he said no...something more physical. (first phone call)

* When he asked me out for lunch, was 15 minutes late and then ordered water because he had already eaten.... So when I told him that was stupid since lunch was HIS idea...he was stressing over the menu so I said I was paying for my own...he THEN ordered...quickly.

* Same guy as above THOUGHT he was going to reach his hand on my plate and eat one of my chicken strips.

* A guy tried to lick my cheek.

* A guy made me spaghetti after I insisted that I didn't eat spaghetti. Told me I should be grateful.

* He bought me 2 turtlenecks for Christmas after I told him what I wanted. Left the receipt in the bag...2 for 15. NO deals.

* Told me that he usually doesn't date women with kids but he would make an exception for me.

* We went to Denny's for ice cream...and he wanted me to run so he could skip out on the bill.

* He was a poor tipper so I put extra money on the table.... I busted him behind me picking up my money.

* We were dating for a couple of months and I spent the night at his house...He pitched a fit because I was on his pillow. He went and got me a toss pillow off his sofa to sleep on.

* Told me that there is a shortage of blk educated men and I need to prove to him that he needed to talk to me and not one of the other chicks out there.

* Pulled down his pants...and has s____ with someone....because I felt nothing.

* wanted me to meet his mother after knowing me all of 24 hours.

* wanted to go purchase furniture for "our" home after 72 hours of dating.

* Asked to borrow money.

* Went to get a check advance before going to the casino.


All of these are different men...well most of them. Will be back with more I am sure.
Click to expand...

:lachen:

WHEW! I needed this laugh!!!!!!!!!
 
TheLaurynDoll said:
- Til he stuck his tongue up my nose and grabbed a booger... licked my armpits... and called me his prince charming with rabbit teeth.

- Til I saw his crusty feet which he justified with "I never take my socks off"

- Til we took a shower twice and I still smelled his butt...
Click to expand...

UGGGH!!!!!!!!!!


(and, I feel you on the licking armpits thing....I've had that....it can make you HYSTERICAL!)
 
Insisted on reading my palms within 30 minutes of meeting me. Told me that I would have a son in the future and he could possibly be the father.

Asked me if he could use me as a job reference within a week of knowing him.

Mentioned to me that he used to be a stripper.
 
Everything was cool until he:

Opened his mouth then everything after just went south! :nono: I hate guys with looks and no substance.
 
*Till he sat down next to me.....he stunk from his locks to his breath to his b.o. :nono: And had the stank nerve to ask me back to his...

*Till we sat down for dinner...and couldnt keep his mouth closed while eating! Ol boy had food spilling out EVERYTIME!!!..WTF??....:wallbash:

*Told me he had gum disease....:perplexed
 
These are things from HS all the way to now:
Told me he loved me after talking to me on the 2nd date.
Told me he had 3 kids and wanted me to have his 4rth (true story)
Told me he was "kind of" seeing someone.
Told me he still lived with his mom. That would've been okay if he wasn't in his 30's.
Told me he hated kids. (Not for me)
Told me his favorite hobby was playing playstation.
Told me my best friend was cute. That wouldn't have been a problem if my best friend wasn't a gay man.
 
Volare said:
These are things from HS all the way to now:
Told me he loved me after talking to me on the 2nd date.
Told me he had 3 kids and wanted me to have his 4rth (true story)
Told me he was "kind of" seeing someone.
Told me he still lived with his mom. That would've been okay if he wasn't in his 30's.
Told me he hated kids. (Not for me)
Told me his favorite hobby was playing playstation.
Told me my best friend was cute. That wouldn't have been a problem if my best friend wasn't a gay man.
Click to expand...
:lachen::lachen::lachen::lachen:
 
Volare said:
Told me my best friend was cute. That wouldn't have been a problem if my best friend wasn't a gay man.
Click to expand...

:lachen::lachen::lachen:

Omg! My ex-best friend is gay and I bragged to him about my SO's "size"... and he actually went and started bragging to everyone else! :blush: Not the girlfriend but her gay best friend! :laugh:

And he hit on my SO several times. I'm laughing looking back on it but at the time it was like :ohwell::perplexed:nono:.
 
-(ex-fiancé)..After lamenting about his insecure wife , begged me to give him a BJ..second wrong?--> it was EASTER Sunday!!

-During a very tame make-out session, dude leans over and softly whispers in my ear that he just "came" ...ummm, we're both FULLY dressed..ewwww

-Getting ready for a girls night out, dude swings by..sees that I'm heading out and beggs, I mean close to ***in tears..for me to ride with him to a motel so he can get in a quickie.

-Wanted to know if I had a problem with him having 4 kids by 4 different women..on top of that, confessed that he hadn't seen any of them in over 2 years.

-Dinner was going great until he randomly asked if I'm "into being choked"?!?

-
 
FLAME said:
-(ex-fiancé)..After lamenting about his insecure wife , begged me to give him a BJ..second wrong?--> it was EASTER Sunday!!

-During a very tame make-out session, dude leans over and softly whispers in my ear that he just "came" ...ummm, we're both FULLY dressed..ewwww

-Getting ready for a girls night out, dude swings by..sees that I'm heading out and beggs, I mean close to ***in tears..for me to ride with him to a motel so he can get in a quickie.

-Wanted to know if I had a problem with him having 4 kids by 4 different women..on top of that, confessed that he hadn't seen any of them in over 2 years.

-Dinner was going great until he randomly asked if I'm "into being choked"?!?

-
Click to expand...
:lachen::lachen::lachen: Girl, bye!
 
these posts are effin ridiculous------omg--luv it

im lmao like is this for realllllllllllllllll---r these dues really for real
 
EVERYTHING WAS COOL UNTIL..... (Keep in mind, diff guys)

While we were on the phone, I heard him pass gas, and he kept on talking

He approached me, opened up his mouth to talk, and his breath smelled like dirty diapers and trash can juice! :nono:

I went to visit this guy, and I think he tried to do a quick clean-up of his place before I came over. Well, went to use his bathroom, and as I closed the door, he missed one item because behind the door laid a pair of his drawers with the crotch up...can you say TRACK STAR. My moto is WIPE TIL DA TISSUE IS WHITE!!!!!!:grunt:

I came out of the ladies room of a restaurant and saw him steal the tip money!!!!

He pulled down his pants and looked like he had two navels.....

He told me he was on food stamps:wallbash:

He told me his penis was peirced

I saw him pick up a pair of worn socks off the floor, smell them and put them on...


I could go on, but LHCF doesn't have enough MB's, GB's, etc
 
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