Everything was cool until he____(fill in the blank)

[shibababy]

This thread is so funny! My daughter asked me if i had the hiccups due to all my chuckles. My. 2 yr old keeps looking at the screen trying to figure out what's so funny. However, I'm scared. I have three daughters. This thread should be required reading for all young ladies. There are way too many fools out there.

 

[chelseatiara]

-until he stole a bottle of juice from Wal-Mart.
-until he asked if I was willing to have biracial babies (if I was willing to date a non black man why wouldn't I be?)
-until he tried to make me feel bad for stating that I would prefer to adopt black children because I would have more in common culturally with them
-until he continued to bring up race in literally every conversation
-until he made a Facebook status stating he had "jungle fever"

Same guy and this was all before the first date. Needless to say I cancelled the date and ending up blocking and deleting him after he made a Trayvon Martin joke.

 

[moneychaser]

I went to his house to pick him up for our date, he wasn't outside, didn't pick up his phone. After 15 min I left. I spoke to him the ext day & asked him what happened. He said he was sick, He must've eaten some bad puss. That was the last time I spoke to him

Got pissed off because I wouldn't have sex with him in his truck, so he drove me back home and before I took 3 steps out of his car, he was gone.

Cussed me out because I wouldn't have sex with him. He later told my friend he was thinking with the wrong head.

How did you all miss this gem

 

[DarkJoy]

Bumpity bump

 

[Anaisin]

Lmaoooo great thread

 

[PeaceFlow]

-until he stole a bottle of juice from Wal-Mart.
-until he made a Facebook status stating he had "jungle fever"

Same guy and this was all before the first date. Needless to say I cancelled the date and ending up blocking and deleting him after he made a Trayvon Martin joke.

LMAO. What a total loser.

 

[claudzie]

I can't with this thread

 

[SweetlyCurly]

-Until he came to pick me up for drinks but decided to stop at the corner store to buy a beer for the ride there...he was driving.
-Same guy, same ocassion...said he was taking me out for drinks (first date)...mind you it was Saturday afternoon so there are plenty of bars with happy hour specials...yet this fool took me to a bar in a damn hotel!!
That day was too much for me. Couldn't end quick enough

 

[summertimewine]

Until he told me he rubs his paynus on pillows to masturbate.
I had to drop him after I thought about how I sat on his couch touching all his nasty paynus pillows

 

[HairNinja]

Until he told me he rubs his paynus on pillows to masturbate.
I had to drop him after I thought about how I sat on his couch touching all his nasty paynus pillows

This is funny pillowman ruined it.

 

[Jasmataz]

Until we were about to do it for the first time, and I saw that he had man boobs. They honestly did not show through his shirts, and he wasn't a heavyset guy.

Trust me when I say that it's very disturbing to see a man's boobs jiggle as he's over top of you . This guy was very tall too so they were close to my face. That was the last time I saw him.

I kinda felt bad though because I know some guys suffer from a medical condition that causes them to grow breasts.

 

[summertimewine]

Until we were about to do it for the first time, and I saw that he had man boobs. They honestly did not show through his shirts, and he wasn't a heavyset guy.

Trust me when I say that it's very disturbing to see a man's boobs jiggle as he's over top of you . This guy was very tall too so they were close to my face. That was the last time I saw him.

I kinda felt bad though because I know some guys suffer from a medical condition that causes them to grow breasts.

Were they nice?! Or all soggy fat, loose skin like? Or were they like some perky lil C cups hittin you in the chin?

 

[Jasmataz]

Were they nice?! Or all soggy fat, loose skin like? Or were they like some perky lil C cups hittin you in the chin?

They were soggy A cups

 

[summertimewine]

They were soggy A cups

Its always the lil soggys that hide out unless you're doing some vigorous exercise or you're starin at his chest.
On to the next one sister!!

 

[LovinCurls]

Till we met and I was significantly taller than him. I'm 5'1 (155 cm).

We were dancing, the makeup came off his face and revealed his face tatoo Till this day I wish I had asked him what brand he was using.

This whole thread has me in stitches.

 

[DarkJoy]

Until he finally admitted the family he told me is well-to-do with a family ranch etc, is actually on section 8 .

Until he admitted a sibling is being indicted for a theft of large sums of money..... from the government

And you see me with my nice career and think im a fool? No son..just. no.

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

Section 8 is a far cry from a family ranch Why even lie?

 

[NGraceO]

nvmd….

 

[mzpurp]

When he told me his g-mom's birthday was coming up and he wanted to do something special in remembrance of her. :scratchch:

I get to his house he has laid out on the sofa one of her "favorite" house dresses and slippers for me to wear for role play.

When I told him "NO". He proceeds to act and speak in a grandma voice cusses at me that I'm no good and to get out!

 

[lux10023]

^^^ this thread.....

I have one....when you got out of my car and the seat smelled like doo-doo...wearing a brooks brother suit but your asss aint clean!!!
...
i made him smell the seat too..he was speechless....and apologized....never saw him again after that..curved the hell outta stinky buttt...ugh 6'5..grown and don't know how to wipe your azzzzz...who does that!!!

saw him walking by bryant park had the nerve to try and stop me..no stinky butt!!!

 

[Sosa]

^^^ this thread.....

I have one....when you got out of my car and the seat smelled like doo-doo...wearing a brooks brother suit but your asss aint clean!!!
...
i made him smell the seat too..he was speechless....and apologized....never saw him again after that..curved the hell outta stinky buttt...ugh 6'5..grown and don't know how to wipe your azzzzz...who does that!!!

saw him walking by bryant park had the nerve to try and stop me..no stinky butt!!!

LOL....You MADE him smell the seat!!! How'd u do it?

 

[lux10023]

i was absolutely that disgustedddd and wanted him to know why he would never hear from me again ( in the .8 seconds i decided if i could deal with it and look past it..nope couldn't)....i said smell that!...the look on his face was priceless..Im talking 6'5 tall dark and fine...suit tailored to the utmost degree..ferragamo shoes w/matching cuff links type dude....and ya azzz stannkkkkkkk.... tragic

we had a great night too..he drank way to much hence me drvn..imagine if i never drove that night..i wouldve been married to stannky butt...lmaoo

LOL....You MADE him smell the seat!!! How'd u do it?

 

[shespoison]

i was absolutely that disgustedddd and wanted him to know why he would never hear from me again ( in the .8 seconds i decided if i could deal with it and look past it..nope couldn't)....i said smell that!...the look on his face was priceless..Im talking 6'5 tall dark and fine...suit tailored to the utmost degree..ferragamo shoes w/matching cuff links type dude....and ya azzz stannkkkkkkk.... tragic

we had a great night too..he drank way to much hence me drvn..imagine if i never drove that night..i wouldve been married to stannky butt...lmaoo

That is wild!!! I had something similar happen but it was someone I knew for years. I tapped him and smiled coyly. And said "dude. you have all day booty and you might have to throw those draws out"

He was so embarrassed. I gave him a pass because he's a human and even though that thang was rank, he usually was fresh and clean. But dude you just met? Nah.

 

[tiffers]

And said "dude. you have all day booty and you might have to throw those draws out"

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

 

[Bette Davis Eyes]

I started this thread last night and just finished.


I have never laughed so hard before.

 

[Pamsc]

I might as well keep it going..

When he wakes me up at 2AM talking about he pissed in my damn bed!!!!! had me changing sheets and slanging clorox at that hour. I told him "now would be a good time for you to leave" I never spoke to him again. He kept calling and texting, but I wasn't haven't it.

 

[DarkJoy]

^^^yours reminded me of one told by a man's POV:

Flippin' the script yall (As told to me by a male friend):

Everything was cool until (he) woke in the middle of the night to her scrubbing the sheet and mattress. Apparently she had dreamt she had the runs and had done so in real life next to him in the bed in her sleep! Poop everywhere!

He finished sleeping ion the couch. She made him breakfast in the morning. He trashed his whole bed and got a new one that day. Never saw her again

 

[Reinventing21]

^^^yours reminded me of one told by a man's POV:

Flippin' the script yall (As told to me by a male friend):

Everything was cool until (he) woke in the middle of the night to her scrubbing the sheet and mattress. Apparently she had dreamt she had the runs and had done so in real life next to him in the bed in her sleep! Poop everywhere!

He finished sleeping ion the couch. She made him breakfast in the morning. He trashed his whole bed and got a new one that day. Never saw her again

 

[DarkJoy]

This fool just keeps popping up!!

Nothing was cool and then he tells me outta blue that his brother just broke his sister in law's orbit around her eye and dislocated her jaw. And the family lied to the police saying that she fell to save their (divorced) abusive parents the heartache.

....But what about that womans broke FACE!

Wish I could change my number. nothing about this mans life is cool.

Until he finally admitted the family he told me is well-to-do with a family ranch etc, is actually on section 8 .

Until he admitted a sibling is being indicted for a theft of large sums of money..... from the government

And you see me with my nice career and think im a fool? No son..just. no.

 

[Holla]

I might as well keep it going..

When he wakes me up at 2AM talking about he pissed in my damn bed!!!!! had me changing sheets and slanging clorox at that hour. I told him "now would be a good time for you to leave" I never spoke to him again. He kept calling and texting, but I wasn't haven't it.

does he live in Florida?

I know someone who experienced this too. Big grown man almost 40 still wets the bed. I was shocked because I know the guy too. She was at his place, he wet the bed, told her to go into the other bedroom, he changed the sheets. She pulled the sheets only to see old stains on the bed which meant he had done it before. Talk about gross and weird. The relationship ended shortly thereafter. He's now married but I wonder bc surely his wife knows by now…..