Are we as black women appreciated enough?

[CarmelCupcake]

I started this thread because i just transferred to a new university in Detroit, MI. This university has a very high percentage of arab/chaldeans. I just find it interesting how Arabic/Chaldean men marry their women. I do not see these race of men with anyone but arabic/chaldean women when i am walking through the hall ways, studying at the library, etc. I also notice that the white men on campus usually hang around with and date white women. However, I notice that the black men will often surround themselves with all races of women, not that anything is wrong with this......however, sometimes, it just seems to be the case that they don't appreciate their own women.

Recently, someone started a thread about light skinned priveledge, and someone commented how a black man was dissapointed when she told him that she was not mixed. Other races of women don't seem to have to deal with these issues. What do you guys think about all this?

 

[msdeevee]

NO we are not but sadly some of us don't appreciate ourselves enough.

 

[RossBoss]

I wouldn't put much stock into that. There is a lot of tension between Arabs and Whites so you probably won't see much of those couples, also they don't have a significant presence in America like Blacks and are not as assimilated as we are. I think I have heard of those rich Saudis/Middle Easterners having White mistresses. Even one of Osama Bin Laden's son married one.

 

[CarmelCupcake]

NO we are not but sadly some of us don't appreciate ourselves enough.

Yes this is true, but i think some people may find it hard to appreciate themselves when they are constantly put down by others, unfortunately.

 

[CarmelCupcake]

I wouldn't put much stock into that. There is a lot of tension between Arabs and Whites so you probably won't see much of those couples, also they don't have a significant presence in America like Blacks and are not as assimilated as we are. I think I have heard of those rich Saudis/Middle Easterners having White mistresses. Even one of Osama Bin Laden's son married one.

In Detroit, the men are very assimilated into the black culture because most of them, if not all of them, own all of the grocery stores, liquor stores, and gas stations. They are in constant contact with black people. They have told me that they will be intimat with black women, have babies with black women, but at the end of the day, they will marry their own race of women. They will not even allow a black man to even look at a chaldean/arabic woman.

 

[cheetarah1980]

Colorism is not the sole property of Black people. It is rampant in Asia and Latin America as well.
As for Black men not dating and/or marrying black women, that's really not the case. Less than ONE out of every 10 married black men is married to a non-black woman. It's not the epidemic it's been made out to be.
We are appreciated and loved. We just need to tune out those who don't appreciate or love us. Also, just because a black man chooses to be with a non-black woman it doesn't mean that he doesn't love and appreciate and love black women. Also, just because white, Arabic, Asian, etc. men are with women in their race it doesn't mean they genuinely love and appreciate them. Many of my white girlfriends have dealt with some heinous treatment from "their own men."

 

[RossBoss]

In Detroit, the men are very assimilated into the black culture because most of them, if not all of them, own all of the grocery stores, liquor stores, and gas stations. They are in constant contact with black people. They have told me that they will be intimat with black women, have babies with black women, but at the end of the day, they will marry their own race of women. They will not even allow a black man to even look at a chaldean/arabic woman.

My brother lived in Detroit and he can't stand them. He told me the same thing you just said here. Them owning all the stores is our fault for allowing people to come into our neighborhoods and disrespect us. Koreans, Arabs and Hispanics know that they can easily move into our neighborhoods and sell/feed us all sorts of inferior crap because we just take it. We would raise hayle if White folks tried to do this but we allow these groups to do it because they are "minorities". I don't consider this "assimilation", just pulling themselves up on the backs of Blacks. They are not looked at as "Americans" by the mainstream, but Blacks are. That is what I mean by being assimilated into mainstream culture.

 

[CarmelCupcake]

My brother lived in Detroit and he can't stand them. He told me the same thing you just said here. Them owning all the stores is our fault for allowing people to come into our neighborhoods and disrespect us. Koreans, Arabs and Hispanics know that they can easily move into our neighborhoods and sell/feed us all sorts of inferior crap because we just take it. We would raise hayle if White folks tried to do this but we allow these groups to do it because they are "minorities". I don't consider this "assimilation", just pulling themselves up on the backs of Blacks. They are not looked at as "Americans" by the mainstream, but Blacks are. That is what I mean by being assimilated into mainstream culture.

Yea, its pretty sad that Detroit is 97% black, yet the stores are owned by 99% non black people. SMH.

 

[Almaz]

Yep and it is the same in most of the Black neighbourhoods in Chicago pretty much all arab owned. Prices why up high for low grade items I would not even let my nieghbours pet rat eat. Digusting

I cannot tell you how many half black half lil Arab babies that I see at the clinic but he won't wife the girl up and won't at least get her a better place to live. Yet his WIFE back home or his WIFE in Palos Hills, Palos Heights, Bridgeview, Orland Park and Orland Hills is at home sitting nice and doing fine.

 

[CarmelCupcake]

Yep and it is the same in most of the Black neighbourhoods in Chicago pretty much all arab owned. Prices why up high for low grade items I would not even let my nieghbours pet rat eat. Digusting

I cannot tell you how many half black half lil Arab babies that I see at the clinic but he won't wife the girl up and won't at least get her a better place to live. Yet his WIFE back home or his WIFE in Palos Hills, Palos Heights, Bridgeview, Orland Park and Orland Hills is at home sitting nice and doing fine.

Really, wow! I didn't know they stayed in Chicago too and owned stores there also. Isn't that a shame how they'll make babies with black women, but refuse to marry them. But now that i think about it, seeing that only 42% of black men are married, black men don't marry black women either. We as black women just get disrespected by everyone. Shaking my head. We can not allow men to continue to do this.

 

[RossBoss]

Really, wow! I didn't know they stayed in Chicago too and owned stores there also. Isn't that a shame how they'll make babies with black women, but refuse to marry them. But now that i think about it, seeing that only 42% of black men are married, black men don't marry black women either. We as black women just get disrespected by everyone. Shaking my head. We can not allow men to continue to do this.

We really dropped the ball after the Civil Rights Movement. The majority of those stores in Black neighborhoods were Black owned before integration and immigration. This is what happens when you only look at Whites as the Boogeyman, those other "minorities" can be just as or even more racist.

 

[CarmelCupcake]

We really dropped the ball after the Civil Rights Movement. The majority of those stores in Black neighborhoods were Black owned before integration and immigration. This is what happens when you only look at Whites as the Boogeyman, those other "minorities" can be just as or even more racist.

Yes, they sure can be racist. Arabic/chaldean men have told my friend, who is black, that arabic/chaldean men think that black women are easy and that they can get anything from them. Yet, countless black women are up in their stores, buying groceries from them.

 

[Spiffy]

Yep and it is the same in most of the Black neighbourhoods in Chicago pretty much all arab owned. Prices why up high for low grade items I would not even let my nieghbours pet rat eat. Digusting

I cannot tell you how many half black half lil Arab babies that I see at the clinic but he won't wife the girl up and won't at least get her a better place to live. Yet his WIFE back home or his WIFE in Palos Hills, Palos Heights, Bridgeview, Orland Park and Orland Hills is at home sitting nice and doing fine.

I noticed this pretty often too when I lived there, but I figured in any melting pot you're going to see all mixtures of people, but is it that bad?

My mom and I were driving home from the gym last night through a predominately black neighborhood and she pointed to an Arab-owned store that has a teller booth for late night purchases; you can't even go in the store to make a purchase. And people were happily standing in line outside in the freezing cold to pay for gas or other things at this store.

I found it so odd how someone could set up shop in a neighborhood of people they seemingly don't even like and the residents will still patronize the place.

 

[CarmelCupcake]

I noticed this pretty often too when I lived there, but I figured in any melting pot you're going to see all mixtures of people, but is it that bad?

My mom and I were driving home from the gym last night through a predominately black neighborhood and she pointed to an Arab-owned store that has a teller booth for late night purchases; you can't even go in the store to make a purchase. And people were happily standing in line outside in the freezing cold to pay for gas or other things at this store.

I found it so odd how someone could set up shop in a neighborhood of people they seemingly don't even like and the residents will still patronize the place.

Are you from Detroit, because this sounds like something in the D?

 

[Lovelylife]

Colorism is not the sole property of Black people. It is rampant in Asia and Latin America as well.
As for Black men not dating and/or marrying black women, that's really not the case. Less than ONE out of every 10 married black men is married to a non-black woman. It's not the epidemic it's been made out to be.
We are appreciated and loved. We just need to tune out those who don't appreciate or love us. Also, just because a black man chooses to be with a non-black woman it doesn't mean that he doesn't love and appreciate and love black women. Also, just because white, Arabic, Asian, etc. men are with women in their race it doesn't mean they genuinely love and appreciate them. Many of my white girlfriends have dealt with some heinous treatment from "their own men."

That's changing. 22% are married inter-racially. The number is growing. It used to be 10%.

 

[Lovelylife]

I started this thread because i just transferred to a new university in Detroit, MI. This university has a very high percentage of arab/chaldeans. I just find it interesting how Arabic/Chaldean men marry their women. I do not see these race of men with anyone but arabic/chaldean women when i am walking through the hall ways, studying at the library, etc. I also notice that the white men on campus usually hang around with and date white women. However, I notice that the black men will often surround themselves with all races of women, not that anything is wrong with this......however, sometimes, it just seems to be the case that they don't appreciate their own women.

Recently, someone started a thread about light skinned priveledge, and someone commented how a black man was dissapointed when she told him that she was not mixed. Other races of women don't seem to have to deal with these issues. What do you guys think about all this?

I'm in college too, so I know exactly what you are talking about. No denial over here even though others seem to make excuses for the situation and deny it. One good thing about my college though is that there are groups of black people that hang out together.

 

[Spiffy]

Are you from Detroit, because this sounds like something in the D?

Nope, I'm in the deep south.

I always wondered if this was a trend in other areas, seems like it's going national.

 

[RossBoss]

That's changing. 22% are married inter-racially. The number is growing. It used to be 10%.

I think their divorce rates are high as well.

 

[RossBoss]

Nope, I'm in the deep south.

I always wondered if this was a trend in other areas, seems like it's going national.

Yes. Welcome to Multi-Cultural America. Black leaders said that it was a good thing for Black Americans that Whites would lose their majority. This is no longer confined to the North.

 

[CarmelCupcake]

Yes, the divorce rate is quite hight. How do people feel about this growing number of interracial marriage...are you all happy, mad, or don't care?

 

[DirtyJerzeyGirly]

Nope, I'm in the deep south.

I always wondered if this was a trend in other areas, seems like it's going national.

Oh this is in South Jersey as well. We even have drive-thru liquor stores.

 

[RossBoss]

Yes, the divorce rate is quite hight. How do people feel about this growing number of interracial marriage...are you all happy, mad, or don't care?

Don't care. Mixed marriages have been happening since the beginning of time and will still be going on til the end of time. I figure that at any given time, people have many soulmates to choose from it's just a matter of finding them.

 

[RossBoss]

Oh this is in South Jersey as well. We even have drive-thru liquor stores.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but don't those cultures prohibit liquor in their communities?

 

[RossBoss]

I found it so odd how someone could set up shop in a neighborhood of people they seemingly don't even like and the residents will still patronize the place.

Yup. Pathetic aint it? After all the blood and sweat we poured into making this country a democracy for our future generations, people who can't stand us are poured into our communities. Again, we have no one but ourselves to blame. My father always tells me that he called it back in the late 60s/early 70s.

 

[DirtyJerzeyGirly]

Correct me if I'm wrong, but don't those cultures prohibit liquor in their communities?

I honestly couldn't tell you.

 

[AvaSpeaks]

Really, wow! I didn't know they stayed in Chicago too and owned stores there also. Isn't that a shame how they'll make babies with black women, but refuse to marry them. But now that i think about it, seeing that only 42% of black men are married, black men don't marry black women either. We as black women just get disrespected by everyone. Shaking my head. We can not allow men to continue to do this.

Well maybe men do this to Black Women because so many Black Women allow it to happen.

So no man ends up respecting the Black Women. If so many of us stopped having children out of wedlock like we do, then maybe some men won't look at as in this way and more may look at us as "potential wife material".

 

[AvaSpeaks]

Correct me if I'm wrong, but don't those cultures prohibit liquor in their communities?

Yes they do!

And I'm from Chicago too but this happens in ALL major cities in alot of Black neighborhoods. Tends to be in low-income or high violent neighborhoods.

I think there should be a law. If you open a NEIGHBORHOOD business, then you should LIVE in that neighborhood. See how many of them keep their stores in our neighborhoods then.

 

[RossBoss]

Well maybe men do this to Black Women because so many Black Women allow it to happen.

So no man ends up respecting the Black Women. If so many of us stopped having children out of wedlock like we do, then maybe some men won't look at as in this way and more may look at us as "potential wife material".

I agree with this but I think in the case of those Arabs, it is a "race thing", so we will never be wife material in their eyes because those cultures have a hatred for anything Black, African and many times American.

And women are held to a higher standard, because for almost every oow Black baby, there is a Black father who has an oow child, but that is not held against them, only the women.

 

[CarmelCupcake]

Well maybe men do this to Black Women because so many Black Women allow it to happen.

So no man ends up respecting the Black Women. If so many of us stopped having children out of wedlock like we do, then maybe some men won't look at as in this way and more may look at us as "potential wife material".

I can not thank you enough for your post! 72% of black children are born out of wedlock. What does this say?...a whole lot. We as black women must demand marriage. If we know someone is going to be a no good father, why even sleep with that person in the first place??!! Our culture can be so backwards.

 

[RossBoss]

Yes they do!

And I'm from Chicago too but this happens in ALL major cities in alot of Black neighborhoods. Tends to be in low-income or high violent neighborhoods.

I think there should be a law. If you open a NEIGHBORHOOD business, then you should LIVE in that neighborhood. See how many of them keep their stores in our neighborhoods then.

I figured as much. I think my brother told me about how they restrict it in their communities but have no problems putting it in ours. I swear, this country is going to be a mess by 2050. erplexed