The Date Was Going Well Until........

[caribeandiva]

Got another one. The date was going well until.... He started talking.

We met at a restaurant for dinner and started sharing our pasts. He told me has a 2 year old daughter as a result of a one night stand. He was highly intoxicated and went home with a random girl from the club. He still has a lot of hate towards her because she told him she was on the pill. (Black girl)

He almost became a dad again a few months ago as a result of the same scenario above but the blood test came back with no possibility of him being the father. He was a little disappointed because he was willing to give a relationship a try with this one (white girl).

He got a dui in January, wrecked his brand new Charger, his blood alcohol level was so high the insurance company wouldn't pay to fix the car so he's paying the balance on a car he can't drive. Which he couldn't drive anyway since his license is suspended till 2020... this is his second dui.
He went to jail for 60 days, lost his job "but is now getting back on his feet."

He asked if we could be a FWB situation since he's focusing on getting his life back on track.
I smiled and told him maybe he should stop at the 2 drinks he's had so far. Blocked him when I got home.

Was he on a date or a therapy session? Geez...

 

[Karmi]

These fools have no shame. Was he black?

Yes he's black and much younger than me. I should have know better.

 

[Karmi]

Was he on a date or a therapy session? Geez...

I swear! I just sat there and smiled so I guess he felt comfortable to keep going.

 

[caribeandiva]

I had a date where the guy basically lectured me the whole time. About what you might ask? About how great and awesome he was!! He didn't ask me any questions about myself and just kept right on talking. I just sat there sipping my cocktail and going uh huh


And he was a bad kisser! I kept trying to fix the kiss but he wasn't having it so that was hopeless. Oh and he told me he was 27. Found out later that he was 47!!!

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

I had a date where the guy basically lectured me the whole time. About what you might ask? About how great and awesome he was!! He didn't ask me any questions about myself and just kept right on talking. I just sat there sipping my cocktail and going uh huh
View attachment 410331

And he was a bad kisser! I kept trying to fix the kiss but he wasn't having it so that was hopeless. Oh and he told me he was 27. Found out later that he was 47!!!

Now sis...he didn't deserve no kiss. He must of been hella foine.

 

[sgold04]

The date was going well until he told me he shot and killed a man...

He wasn't military or law enforcement btw.

 

[caribeandiva]

Now sis...he didn't deserve no kiss. He must of been hella foine.

he was foine but I regret that kiss. I was spineless back then. I had enough courage to block his a$$ though. until i ran into him a few months later and he wanted an explanation as to why I ghosted him.

 

[caribeandiva]

The date was going well until he told me he shot and killed a man...

He wasn't military or law enforcement btw.

I'm scared to ask why he told you that on a FIRST DATE?!

 

[sgold04]

I'm scared to ask why he told you that on a FIRST DATE?!

We met at the gym and had several chats before our first date.

He started telling me about his hood past after several drinks (this was in Philly) and then he became really somber and started talking about regrets. People tend to tell me their deepest darkest secrets pretty quickly, but I was not expecting something like that from HIM. If he never told me about his dope boy past, I wouldn't have guessed.

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

We met at the gym and had several chats before our first date.

He started telling me about his hood past after several drinks (this was in Philly) and then he became really somber and started talking about regrets. People tend to tell me their deepest darkest secrets pretty quickly, but I was not expecting something like that from HIM. If he never told me about his dope boy past, I wouldn't have guessed.

Did he tell you enough to go to Crime Stoppers? His butt should be locked up.

 

[sgold04]

Did he tell you enough to go to Crime Stoppers? His butt should be locked up.

He didn't say "I shot and killed a man" verbatim, but I knew exactly what he meant when he started sharing, so I cut him off before he went any further. I was not trying to hear anymore. Blame my mom's hood ass family (keep your mouth shut about everything) + my own desire to stay alive, but I stopped asking questions, developed a headache, and ubered home. I said something about hating what this country does to Black men before I left him.

Reason #5,1202 why I hated dating in Philly.

 

[Evolving78]

I've met some weirdos in my time...

I never forget this dude, this date . I actually ran into him again at another party while in college with another issue. Soooo he picked me up and his car had strange odor. I thought he may haven eaten earlier or just had a strange scent, he was a hack at the time . All of sudden he says let me stop home to change my sock. I shrug and go for the ride.....

We get to his place and he runs in the bathroom with ONE clean sock. I hear him gurgling and growling. I knock and asked if he was o.k.. He says "yes, I been oozing this crap outta me for over a month." " I'll be glad when this man period clears up ." And proceeded to drop the puss infected sock in the trash.


I was disgusted and asked him to drop by my friend's house because she was sick.

I don't understand.. man period? Sock? And he is on a date? I don't understand!

 

[LaBella]

This is a dating strategy called Time travelling...
He takes you to multiple places in one night. By the end of the evening it will not feel like your first date, but your third...
Which makes you give up the goodies earlier.

Learned this on a podcast for men about dating, and well life...
I was a loyal listener for over a year.

The date never got started because he wanted to pick me up (only known him for 3 days). He planned to take me to 3 places- bar, restaurant, lounge at 10:00pm.
Nah son, I'll pass.

He got mad when I said, let's start off with one place and see how it goes. I'll follow you to the next.

 

[caribeandiva]

This is a dating strategy called Time travelling...
He takes you to multiple places in one night. By the end of the evening it will not feel like your first date, but your third...
Which makes you give up the goodies earlier.

Learned this on a podcast for men about dating, and well life...
I was a loyal listener for over a year.

Really? I had no idea! Learned something new today. @Karmi really dodged a bullet there.

 

[GeorginaSparks]

This is a dating strategy called Time travelling...
He takes you to multiple places in one night. By the end of the evening it will not feel like your first date, but your third...
Which makes you give up the goodies earlier.

Learned this on a podcast for men about dating, and well life...
I was a loyal listener for over a year.

what? this is some hotep mess

 

[Guapa1]

So I saw this guy on a few dates and they went OK. Then he wanted to spend a day with me but I said he'd have to come along to my barre class as I've already paid for it and wasn't going to miss it.
So we're working with a small lightweight ball, we stop to stretch and he threw the ball at the instructor hitting her in her head. Then calmly picked up the ball and came back to the barre as though nothing happened.

 

[Karmi]

@LaBella really???! I didnt know that. I swore he lost his damn mind thinking I was going to be trapped in a strangers car picking me up at 10pm. Idiot.

What podcast was this??

 

[DarkJoy]

So I saw this guy on a few dates and they went OK. Then he wanted to spend a day with me but I said he'd have to come along to my barre class as I've already paid for it and wasn't going to miss it.
So we're working with a small lightweight ball, we stop to stretch and he threw the ball at the instructor hitting her in her head. Then calmly picked up the ball and came back to the barre as though nothing happened.

was she hurt? how she react? dude is an abuser

 

[Guapa1]

@DarkJoy I couldn't believe it.
She said "well in all my years teaching, no one has ever done that".
It wasn't a heavy ball and it was also quite soft.
I tore him a new one when we got in the car.
He genuinely didn't see the problem and said "well if she didn't find it funny, apologise for me".

 

[Karmi]

@Guapa1 what a loser, who thinks getting a ball thrown at their head is fun joke?
I'm convinced men are crazy.

I get excited when I see this thread bumped, great laughs

 

[caribeandiva]

@DarkJoy I couldn't believe it.
She said "well in all my years teaching, no one has ever done that".
It wasn't a heavy ball and it was also quite soft.
I tore him a new one when we got in the car.
He genuinely didn't see the problem and said "well if she didn't find it funny, apologise for me".

please tell me that was your last date with this fool!

 

[caribeandiva]

I don't understand.. man period? Sock? And he is on a date? I don't understand!

neither do we sweetie. neither do we.

 

[awhyley]

This is a dating strategy called Time travelling...
He takes you to multiple places in one night. By the end of the evening it will not feel like your first date, but your third...
Which makes you give up the goodies earlier.

And here I was thinking that they were so smitten/whipped. I can only imagine the line(s) they spit after this,
"After all the places we've been since I've known you", "After all the time we've spent together . . . "

($6.50 well spent)

 

[ladysaraii]

The date never got started because he wanted to pick me up (only known him for 3 days). He planned to take me to 3 places- bar, restaurant, lounge at 10:00pm.
Nah son, I'll pass.

He got mad when I said, let's start off with one place and see how it goes. I'll follow you to the next.

That just sounds exhausting.

This is a dating strategy called Time travelling...
He takes you to multiple places in one night. By the end of the evening it will not feel like your first date, but your third...
Which makes you give up the goodies earlier.

Learned this on a podcast for men about dating, and well life...
I was a loyal listener for over a year.

They will do the most won't they? Thanks for the heads up

 

[Transformer]

I don't understand.. man period? Sock? And he is on a date? I don't understand!

I'm assuming he had an STD and didn't know it. He was using the sock as a sanitary pad for his penis.

 

[LaBella]

@LaBella really???! I didnt know that. I swore he lost his damn mind thinking I was going to be trapped in a strangers car picking me up at 10pm. Idiot.

What podcast was this??

The beige philip show

Especially the early episodes from a few years back are interesting. I started at episode 1, and had a hard time listening to it. There was a lot of 'b*tches ain't sh*t'...
It took me some time to look through that. But because this was recommended by a male friend I regard very highly, I pushed through...

I learned lots about life, sex and relationships. Concepts that were explained in a not so easy way, but once I got it, there were lot's of hidden gems in there.

I stopped listening in march/april this year. The podcasts got long, unfocussed and repetitive.

Currently only the last 5 podcast are free. So for the goodstuff in the beginning you have to pay. It's 2 dollars a month for access to everything. I am still paying as way of support.

If you do decide to subscribe and pay, I recall episode 7 with Yamaneika Saunders got me to think, well maybe it's all not as bad as it initially sounds...

I mostly liked the section listeners mail. Real people, real challenges.

Disclaimer: please be prepared for lot's of cussing. If you can't handle that, don't start this.

 

[LaBella]

There is actually loads on Youtube I see now.

This is the time travelling technique:


And this one is my favorite, the jelly bean theory:


Let me know what you think!

I should have shared a long time ago. I wish I had some females to discuss when I went through all of this...

I discussed everything with my male friend as he was listening too.

ETA
I also found the full episode 7.
The jelly bean theory is a part of that show.

 

[Karmi]

@LaBella thanks for posting! I'll check out the YouTube videos for free.

Edited: I actually like his stuff. I might sub to his podcast. I like listening to a mans perspective on dating. I grew up with a bunch of male cousins who taught me about men and how to handle them.