Would You Ever Date Someone In A Wheelchair?

[caribeandiva]

I don't mean someone you already knew or were in a relationship with BEFORE they became physically handicapped. What if he looked like a professional athlete, good personality, had money, and his junk worked just fine? Looks as good Rafael Solano from Jane the virgin:



I got the idea for this thread when I met a dude like that earlier. It was strictly business but it got me thinking if I would do it or not. How about YOU ladies? Have you dated or married someone who was already handicapped when you met them? Or would that be a no-go in your book?

 

[toaster]

I would. I think it would be better than dating someone that was able bodied when you knew them and then had to be in a wheelchair.

If they have been in the chair for a while they may be in a better place emotionally.

 

[Dee_33]

I wouldn't. Crazy story alert: a former coworker dated a guy in a wheelchair and he used to abuse her. I was like how tha hell??? I said girl you should literally walk away. She eventually left dude but would still take care of him when he couldnt find a care taker. Her self esteem was trash tho, she was about 100lbs overweight and ended up having wls, lost weight and married a former crackhead who relasped shortly after the wedding.

 

[tru4reele]

One of my best friends married a man in a wheelchair who used to go upside her head. Or upside her stomach and legs.

 

[caribeandiva]

I wouldn't. Crazy story alert: a former coworker dated a guy in a wheelchair and he used to abuse her. I was like how tha hell??? I said girl you should literally walk away. She eventually left dude but would still take care of him when he couldnt find a care taker. Her self esteem was trash tho, she was about 100lbs overweight and ended up having wls, lost weight and married a former crackhead who relasped shortly after the wedding.

Homegirl didn't need weight loss surgery. I think therapy would've been a better investment. Lawwddd...

 

[HaveSomeWine]

No, I would not. I do not have the aptitude or desire to care for a disabled man. It would be different if he got into an accident while we were together. Then, I would have to put my shallowness aside and really evaluate things to make a decision. I kind of feel like if I were willing to abandon a spouse that's been in an accident, I probably never really loved them all along and vice versa.

 

[Gin&Tonic]

I would- if he were very wealthy.

 

[moneychaser]

One of my best friends married a man in a wheelchair who used to go upside her head. Or upside her stomach and legs.

Not today Satan lol

 

[LovelyRo]

No thanks...

One of my buddies has been paralyzed since his 21st bday. He's about 6'3 and very handsome... nice build and everything. He gets a lot of women (he's attractive and his game is strong) and "it"doesn't even work.

 

[Black Ambrosia]

No thanks...

One of my buddies got paralyzed on his 21st bday. He's about 6'3 and very handsome... nice build and everything. He gets a lot of women (he's attractive and his game is strong) and "it"doesn't even work.

 

[LovelyRo]

I'm sooooo serious! He's divorced due to infidelity too!

 

[SlimPickinz]

Not Brother Martin

 

[SlimPickinz]

I would not be able to date a man with any handicap if I'm being honest. Unless a man I was with became disabled along the way, I know I wouldn't be able to handle it.

 

[movingforward13]

I wouldn't. It would be different if after we got together he became paralyzed but I wouldn't do it before (unless we were like coworkers or something and relationship grew and deepened as we worked together) but I honestly don't ever see something like that happening. Same goes for midgets. I actually had a midget contact me online.... no thank you.

 

[sunnieb]

This may sound awful since my husband is currently considered legally disabled because of his health condition......but, no. I wouldn't. I can't see myself doing the caregiver thing for a new guy that wants to date me. Doesn't seem like fun.

My husband and I had been together 26 years before his health started to decline. It was a no-brainer for me to take on the caregiver role. I won't do this for any other man. It's not worth the time and effort to me. Sorry.

We could be friends though!

 

[Sosoothing]

He would have to be fully physically independent for me to consider it.

 

[caribeandiva]

 

[caribeandiva]

I'm sooooo serious! He's divorced due to infidelity too!

How you gon be cheatin when you can't even get it up?

 

[hopeful]

Nope.

And if he became paralyzed early in, I would leave him.

 

[caribeandiva]

Nope.

And if he became paralyzed early in, I would leave him.

That's cold but I get it

 

[FoxxyLocs]

Wheelchair, probably not. But I wouldn't rule out all disabilities - like if he was deaf or an amputee or something. It would depend on the circumstances, his independence, and his mental health

 

[DarkJoy]

whoa. see that "it" is the reason i wouldnt date someone paralyzed.

No thanks...

One of my buddies has been paralyzed since 21st bday. He's about 6'3 and very handsome... nice build and everything. He gets a lot of women (he's attractive and his game is strong) and "it"doesn't even work.

 

[sunnieb]

Wheelchair, probably not. But I wouldn't rule out all disabilities - like if he was deaf or an amputee or something. It would depend on the circumstances, his independence, and his mental health

Amputee would be cool. I work with a guy who is a lower leg amputee. He gets around like it's nothing. Been doing it for over 20 years.

See, I wouldn't be a caregiver for him right out the gate. He's just a guy with a disability.

 

[NappyNelle]

I used to have a wheelchair, so I wouldn't rule it out. However, I need help some days and if we can't help each other, what are we gonna do?

 

[IronButterfly]

Welp...judging by the comments in this thread, I better get used to gaining a white daughter-in-law.

 

[caribeandiva]

Welp...judging by the comments in this thread, I better get used to gaining a white daughter-in-law.

 

[sunnieb]

Welp...judging by the comments in this thread, I better get used to gaining a white daughter-in-law.

Naw! There's plenty of BW out there who will do it and love it. We're just a small sampling and are being totally honest.

 

[NappyNelle]

Welp...judging by the comments in this thread, I better get used to gaining a white daughter-in-law.

@IronButterfly During my first hospital stay my black male friend said: "Well, the white boys always liked you. Maybe they'll feel like they have a shot now." He was joking, but it really hurt my feelings and had me questioning my "worth." The ladies on the board "got me together" real quick! Lol

Disabilities affect us all so differently, that I'm glad it weeds out some people. I don't want someone to be with me out of pity or feel resentment because of my health challenges. And I certainly don't want someone to take advantage.

Based on your previous posts, I think your son will have many genuine relationships with black women. He will be intelligent with an independent thought process that will intrigue.

How old is your son now? He's not 10 yet, right?

 

[IronButterfly]

I forgot to add my sad face. lol

 

[IronButterfly]

@IronButterfly During my first hospital stay my black male friend said: "Well, the white boys always liked you. Maybe they'll feel like they have a shot now." He was joking, but it really hurt my feelings and had me questioning my "worth." The ladies on the board "got me together" real quick! Lol

Disabilities affect us all so differently, that I'm glad it weeds out some people. I don't want someone to be with me out of pity or feel resentment because of my health challenges. And I certainly don't want someone to take advantage.

Based on your previous posts, I think your son will have many genuine relationships with black women. He will be intelligent with an independent thought process that will intrigue.

How old is your son now? He's not 10 yet, right?

lol I was just yanking ya'll's chains! My boy is 8 and hardly notices the differences between boys and girls. But I will say, he is kind of smitten over the new Mexican pca, so ya never know! lol