Tell Us How You Stroke The Male Ego

[SilverSurfer]

Ladies, it's no secret that men love having their ego stroked. They love to feel needed, knowledgeable, strong and important. Catering to a man's ego often helps women get what they want from men, even if doing so simply to brighten their day or bring a smile to their face. So let's share some ways (in great detail) of how we ladies play into the male ego. Give examples and tell what or if you get anything out of it and how the men react to it.

ETA: this can apply to your man or any man in general.

ETA : Ego stroking can also be done via damsel in distress

 

[yardyspice]

It's funny you bring this up because it is one of the main ingredients in a happy marriage.
I do the following:

1. I tell him how much I appreciate him.
2. I let him take care of me.
3. I make loud noises.

 

[SilverSurfer]

I pretty much live my life this way that it almost happens naturally with all men that I encounter so I have many many examples to share. However I'll list the very basic ones that gets them every time.

1) The I can't open the jar trick lol. "I've been trying to open this jar and it's just not opening. Can you please give it a try but let me warn you its very hard to open, I've spent like 10 minutes trying to open it" - result - he opens it instantly with ease and walks off with a big smile and ego feeling like He-man lol

 

[Ganjababy]

This is one of the few things I am not good at.

 

[sunnieb]

Go to him for advice or to solve a problem. When he's talking, look totally into him. Tell him thank you.

Follow-up later and say you took his advice and let him know the positve results. Thank him again.

 

[sunnieb]

I pretty much live my life this way that it almost happens naturally with all men that I encounter so I have many many examples to share. However I'll list the very basic ones that gets them every time.

1) The I can't open the jar trick lol. "I've been trying to open this jar and it's just not opening. Can you please give it a try but let me warn you its very hard to open, I've spent like 10 minutes trying to open it" - result - he opens it instantly with ease and walks off with a big smile and ego feeling like He-man lol

True! I haven't lifted or opened anything since we've been together. He loves coming to my rescue!

 

[Kiadodie]

This is something I really need to work on, I"ll be subscribing.

 

[ItsMeFre]

1. My husband likes when he figures things out that I couldn't figure out so when that happens I'm always sure to hype it up like wow how did you figure that out... Then he goes on and on about how he did it lol...he loves it.

2. SHOW him how much I appreciate him by doing little things I don't normally do and explaining why for example having bath water ready and saying I've notice you been dealing with the kids so much you seem tired. I think you need a night off from daddy duties (we have 3 1/2 kids). It makes him feel like his work doesn't go unnoticed and he feels good about his role in our family/lives.

 

[SilverSurfer]

Here's a classic that I did many moons ago to a total unsuspecting strange man lol. So I have never taking my car to the car wash before and this particular day, I wanted DH to do it but he couldn't so I decided to go wash my car myself. So I get there and try to operate the manual car wash thingy. So I pull up, ask the attendant man how to do it, he tells me, I go back and tell him, I can't figure it out, he tells me again, I go back and tell him, I'm not seeing the button and it's telling me to do something and I have no idea what that means, he explains it to me again, I go back and tell him it's just not working, it's too confusing to figure out. So what does he do, he says "ma'am why don't I just wash the car for you" - secretly laughing as I watch him wash my car.

 

[SilverSurfer]

Ladies let's really give the details of how exactly we play this game. I'm a pro at it.

 

[SophieDulce]

Well whenever my Dh is planning on making a big decision he always ask for me advice, now unless he is about to do something stupid, I usually say something like, I think that is great babe, your really wise and you always have good judgment I support you.


I always compliment him when he gets a new hair cut, or changes something in his attire. He started playing sports again and I always let him know how much better his body has been looking.

After coloring I always let him know how Good he makes me feel.

I tell him all the time he is such a great dad and provider.
I just like to let him know he is appreciated, and Its comeback times 1000
and im always genuine when I do it.

 

[Kiadodie]

Well whenever my Dh is planning on making a big decision he always ask for me advice, now unless he is about to do something stupid.

I usually say something like, I think that is great babe, your really wise and you always have good judgment I support you.

I always compliment him when he gets a new hair cut, or changes something in his attire. He started playing sports again and I always let him know how much better his body has been looking.

After coloring I always let him know how Good he makes me feel.

I tell him all the time he is such a great dad and provider.
I just like to let him know he is appreciated, and Its comeback times 1000
and im always genuine when I do it.

Hmm ok, but where do you draw the line? LIke, playing hard to get type thing. Or are we not supposed to do that?

 

[TayMac]

Here's a classic that I did many moons ago to a total unsuspecting strange man lol. So I have never taking my car to the car wash before and this particular day, I wanted DH to do it but he couldn't so I decided to go wash my car myself. So I get there and try to operate the manual car wash thingy. So I pull up, ask the attendant man how to do it, he tells me, I go back and tell him, I can't figure it out, he tells me again, I go back and tell him, I'm not seeing the button and it's telling me to do something and I have no idea what that means, he explains it to me again, I go back and tell him it's just not working, it's too confusing to figure out. So what does he do, he says "ma'am why don't I just wash the car for you" - secretly laughing as I watch him wash my car.

I thought that was the "damsel in distress" lol.

 

[SophieDulce]

Hmm ok, but where do you draw the line? LIke, playing hard to get type thing. Or are we not supposed to do that?

Are we talking about a husband, or just a guy your dating. Cause that def changes how I would go about things

 

[Lucie]

I ask him for advice. I know it makes him feel like his opinion matters.

Sometimes he will be doing something basic (getting water, playing with my dog, or playing a game) and I will grab his face and kiss it all over. He acts bothered and shoos me away but when I stop, he'll be like, "Cherie, why'd you stop?"

I let him do things he offers to do. Stuff like bring me tassot, wine coolers, fix my shelf, walk the dog, pick me up from the station, et cetera.

When I have every reason to scream at him from here until his next two lives, I look at him, say less than 1 sentence and do something that has nothing to do with him. It makes him do better next time around and actually realize why he was wrong or could do better.

I seduce him without wanting something. I find many women use sex to get what they want and it will work. But it will bother him after a while of realizing he is being used.

I look nice.

I compliment him, especially in front of others.

Even if he is wrong I allow him to save face publicly.

If I have to tell him something is wrong, I do it constructively.

I applaud him when he does something different than his usual. My dude is not the best communicator and shuts down at conflict. But lately he has been able to open up more and not run off, so I act like it is the most amazing thing in the world.

I don't nag. One time I say something and the next time I handle it myself. If it happens were I do handle something myself, the next time I say something he is already on it.

 

[SilverSurfer]

Here's a recent one. A guy comes to the house to repair something. He asks me where is the water switch for the outside watering thing. Honesty I did not know where it was but I knew where it wasn't and took him there. I took him to the utility box and said "well you can try this box, I've seen other service guys come here and press some buttons to turn stuff on and off" He says "ma'am (you know it worked whenever they refer to you as ma'am, miss, baby or sweetheart) that's not it that's the utility box but don't worry about it, we will try to locate it" . Result - got a nice discount on the repairs. (sigh I'm so good at this lol)

 

[Kiadodie]

Are we talking about a husband, or just a guy your dating. Cause that def changes how I would go about things

OK, for me it is for a guy I"m dating..please elaborate. I usually put the "down" or make them feel small but I think it is so they wont hurt me but it doesnt work. I just come off inconsiderate. How can I boost their ego while not letting them take advantage of it?

 

[Lucie]

Hmm ok, but where do you draw the line? LIke, playing hard to get type thing. Or are we not supposed to do that?

I don't think you are playing, you really are supposed to have a life. Men should not feel safe all of the time. And I am not saying he should be worried of always losing you but there should be an air of mystery that is coupled with the air that you are a woman that has a life.

 

[SilverSurfer]

Are we talking about a husband, or just a guy your dating. Cause that def changes how I would go about things

Either or is fine for this topic. Me I play this card with all men and most times it works to my advantage lol.

 

[Ganjababy]

Thanks for this thread. I have been a nut crusher for so long. Despite this my DH loves me. I would like to be a kinder, more loving person. Only because i think he deserves better and i notice our relatioonship flourishes when i am a nicer person. I like this thread

 

[SilverSurfer]

OK, for me it is for a guy I"m dating..please elaborate. I usually put the "down" or make them feel small but I think it is so they wont hurt me but it doesnt work. I just come off inconsiderate. How can I boost their ego while not letting them take advantage of it?

Easy, boost their ego to gain advantage. If you want something from him or want him to do and react a certain way that is advantageous to you, then you play the card.

 

[Lucie]

OK, for me it is for a guy I"m dating..please elaborate. I usually put the "down" or make them feel small but I think it is so they wont hurt me but it doesnt work. I just come off inconsiderate. How can I boost their ego while not letting them take advantage of it?

Well, stop putting them down. That's one. Putting anyone on the defensive is the best way to get them not to like you. If they are saying something you like, or are interested in, let them know. Ask them questions about what they like. Most people LOVE to talk about themselves. Of course don't do it like you work for CNN but banter, laugh, smile, be friendly. Men love that. Ask them questions about things you do not know but feel they could enlighten you on. Men love to share what they know with us. Some women marvel at how an "ugly: woman can get such hot looking or rich dudes but these "ugly" women know how to stroke a man's ego.

If a man tries to take advantage of you, you stand up for yourself. But when you are just getting to know a man, be aware but upbeat. Not all men are created equal.

 

[SilverSurfer]

Here's another one. When I'm parked in a tight space or in the garage and another car is behind me, if DH is home, I'll call him and say, "honey I can't pull out, the space is too tight can you do it for me?" and he'll come out and back out my car while smiling and telling me how easy it was because I had enough room. Yeah I could have struggled and got it done but why should I when I have a man at home
that can do it.

Oh and this has also happened while I was alone and out shopping and trying like crazy to back out of a tight space and looking so flustered that some guy just came and did it for me like it was nothing. I thanked with wow I can't believe how quickly you did that and he walks off feeling accomplished with a grin on his face.

 

[MrsJaiDiva]

My husband is pretty easy...

1. I cook what he wants to eat. If he requests something, I'll cook it for him special. He likes to wander into the kitchen while I'm cooking, and pat me on the butt...such a caveman.

2. When I need a jar opened, I yell out "Big, strong man...help me please!!"

3. I let him grip me up in the bedroom...he can get all aggressive, and I can't fight him off, cause he's too powerful. ...which is the truth anyway, cause he is Very strong. I let him be as manly as he likes.

Eta: Other men are pretty easy too...I just smile, and bat my lashes, or flutter around. Fluttering gets a lot done for me.

 

[SilverSurfer]

DH has so many gadgets and high tech setup that I honestly don't know how to turn on the TV in our room and we watch TV movies nightly. So when he's not home, particularly this one time he was out of the country I called him to tell me how to turn on the TV and get the DVD working. He tries to explain it to me but I say "honey it's just too confusing, I wish you were here to do it. I can't figure out anything in here while you are gone, I can't wait for you to get back" - result he feels needed like a man although I couldn't get the TV working but oh well.

 

[Kiadodie]

I love your examples ladies. I guess I've been so independent for most of my life, it is hard to give up that control if that makes any sense.

 

[sunnieb]

Put some effort into your appearance when you go out together - even if you're just running errands.

I always wear full make-up, a nice blouse, and hairstyle when hanging out with dh.

They love to show off what they "have".

 

[SilverSurfer]

I don't want to hog up this thread so I'll chill with my many examples for a minute lol.

So something happened and I had to take my car in to get looked at by this male machenic so he tells me to pop my hood and I didn't know how and honestly I didn't but I could have looked for it but instead I said, "I'm not sure how to do it". He says it should be a button on the inside, I say "I see lots of buttons and not sure which one" he says, "sweetheart let me get in there and do it for you" lol

 

[Kiadodie]

I don't want to hog up this thread so I'll chill with my many examples for a minute lol.

So something happened and I had to take my car in to get looked at by this male machining, so he tells me to pop my hood and I didn't know how and honestly I didn't but I could have looked for it but instead I said, "I'm not sure how to do it". He says it should be a button on the inside, I say "I see lots of buttons and not sure which one" he says, "sweetheart let me get in there and do it for you" lol

OK so I feel like you're saying "act dumb" in most situation to make them feel good. Are you?

 

[SilverSurfer]

OK so I feel like you're saying "act dumb" in most situation to make them feel good. Are you?

Honestly stroking a men's ego often does require us to pretend like we don't know or can't do something just to boost that ego of theirs.

I do this so much that it switches on naturally when I'm around all men, even when there's nothing for me to actually gain. I am happy enough to have made their day and in turn they view me as a delicate little innocent lady that they must treat well and protect. I love that feeling lol.