♥~♥ SINGLE MOTHERS SUPPORT THREAD! ♥~♥

Whelp....things were going great.....new house...new car...new job.....them I fell on moving day and broke my foot....so I'm in this torture chamber for 3-6 weeks.....my son had to drive my car around and scratched it all up. FML
 
shyekiera said:
Heck my kids are 10,12,15 and I still have to repeat myself. .allowance? Call me mean but I don't believe in allowances for chores.. Maybe just so they can have pocket change, but no set amount.
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I dont believe in allowance for chores either. She gets literally $3 :lol:

I dont believe in the old school way of just giving allowance because the kid exists as my parents did.:lol: its not teaching anything but to spend it as soon as its in hand.

Above the behavior issue is teaching her early how to manage money. I think many parents (particularly black folk, lets be honest) dont know how to manage finances much less pass on financial health to their kids. I didnt until a cpl years ago. Im on the Ramsey challenge and there's a kid version which teaches giving a base salary (lol) or whatever works for the fam but not for certain things like washing dishes (does mom get paid for dishes?! No. So no one in the house does!). Consider it as the same as adults would earn for work according to the job description. Teaches them how to save, budget, and spend and that very little in life is free and mom and dads cash doesnt come by magic either.

Just this week i gave her her weekly $3. As she does every week, immediately laid out all her cash savings, counted it, took out a dollar for snacks for the week, and put the rest back as she is in process of saving to buy herself a "big" bday present in 6 weeks.

This is way more financially advanced then I was at almost 9 so the plan is working on several levels. Im pleased.
 
DarkJoy said:
I dont believe in allowance for chores either. She gets literally $3 :lol:

I dont believe in the old school way of just giving allowance because the kid exists as my parents did.:lol: its not teaching anything but to spend it as soon as its in hand.

Above the behavior issue is teaching her early how to manage money. I think many parents (particularly black folk, lets be honest) dont know how to manage finances much less pass on financial health to their kids. I didnt until a cpl years ago. Im on the Ramsey challenge and there's a kid version which teaches giving a base salary (lol) or whatever works for the fam but not for certain things like washing dishes (does mom get paid for dishes?! No. So no one in the house does!). Consider it as the same as adults would earn for work according to the job description. Teaches them how to save, budget, and spend and that very little in life is free and mom and dads cash doesnt come by magic either.

Just this week i gave her her weekly $3. As she does every week, immediately laid out all her cash savings, counted it, took out a dollar for snacks for the week, and put the rest back as she is in process of saving to buy herself a "big" bday present in 6 weeks.

This is way more financially advanced then I was at almost 9 so the plan is working on several levels. Im pleased.
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That is great!!!!! I know I wasn't taught...I am on a challenge now not sure why its called,but your weekly savings increase one dollar each week.
 
Hey Ladies, my teens are keeping me busy. My oldest and youngest have jobs. The middle one is looking. We have spring break coming in two weeks. Next weekend we are going to my middle child college open house. She got into the summer enrichment program so two weeks after she graduates we take her to school. I will drinking heavily.

Have a great weekend...Happy first day of spring.
 
shortdub78 said:
wth happened! Feel better lady!
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Thank you so much sisters. I was moving the last of the boxes from the old house. I was stepping out of the front door and either missed the step or stepped on the edge of it. My foot and ankle rolled under me and I fell hard. Sprained my ankle really bad and broke a bone in my foot. Thank god I don't need surgery.
So I'm in this boot thingie for 4-6 weeks. My house is a mess and it's driving me crazy. My boys have been really helpful though. I did manage to get my dresses hung up and my room slightly arranged. But downstairs is another story.
It's still really painful and swollen.
 
Ran errands with dd yesterday. Got lots of interested glances from middle class looking BM. Thats unusual to see so many in this area and have so many concentrated in one spot at one time. But there was a local event I found out later. However what was really bad? Every last one of them was with a wife or SO and sometimes children (either blended family or not). All the women were "other ". Every last one.

Is it that these black men think black single moms are only side heaux worthy or what?! I tell you I was swearing all up in my head at these idiots. This area is really hard on us...particularly coming from our own. It just upsets me sometimes. Ugh.
 
DarkJoy said:
Ran errands with dd yesterday. Got lots of interested glances from middle class looking BM. Thats unusual to see so many in this area and have so many concentrated in one spot at one time. But there was a local event I found out later. However what was really bad? Every last one of them was with a wife or SO and sometimes children (either blended family or not). All the women were "other ". Every last one.

Is it that these black men think black single moms are only side heaux worthy or what?! I tell you I was swearing all up in my head at these idiots. This area is really hard on us...particularly coming from our own. It just upsets me sometimes. Ugh.
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I completely agree with you about their perception of black single moms. I'm so over men that are married or with someone. I am CONSTANTLY deleting their voicemail, email, and spam texts. They're relentless in their pursuit, but not one of them has intentions of leaving home. I've even told them over and over that if they keep bothering me that I'm gonna start contacting some wives. Why do they get to run aimlessly around with the intent of cheating with not a care in the world? I don't want anyone else's husband. I want my own husband.
 
deltadreamland said:
I completely agree with you about their perception of black single moms. I'm so over men that are married or with someone. I am CONSTANTLY deleting their voicemail, email, and spam texts. They're relentless in their pursuit, but not one of them has intentions of leaving home. I've even told them over and over that if they keep bothering me that I'm gonna start contacting some wives. Why do they get to run aimlessly around with the intent of cheating with not a care in the world? I don't want anyone else's husband. I want my own husband.
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deltadreamland is this BM specifically youre talking bout our is it a mash up? The bay area brothas is trippin. Highly susceptible to media and Hollywood influence. I ain't giving these ninjas no passes.
 
DarkJoy said:
deltadreamland is this BM specifically youre talking bout our is it a mash up? The bay area brothas is trippin. Highly susceptible to media and Hollywood influence. I ain't giving these ninjas no passes.
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Black men only. At some point, these were men that I dated that went on to marry other women, of course. Then, somehow magically, they have all awakened from their "dream" and realized that either A. I was the one that got away, B. They had no business marrying a soul ever, or C. Both

But this is the thing...I'd never go back to dating any of them, even if they were to get a divorce. The men I've dealt with seriously give themselves more credit than they deserve. Very disrespectful in my opinion. The bottom line for me is the fact that I will never KNOWINGLY date a married nor a separated man.
 
Very disrespectful to both you and their current so. :ohwell: sorry they are like that

Thank goodness im not in the market for a man right now or id be furious. Lol
 
I have had my DD's school project on the brain all night! Just thinking about add more things to it. I love and hate this type of stuff! I always gotta go out and spend money! I try to keep art and craft supplies stocked up, but my little artist uses up everything! My dd is very well versed on sea creatures! I think I will buy her a book on sea animals and take her to the aquarium for getting good grades! I'm glad she is crafty as well! She has good ideas! I always ask her opinion on stuff anyway. She has a good eye. She is only 7, but her way of thinking and seeing things are amazing!
 
Ok ladies the project is complete! I am shy when it comes to sharing certain things, but we are family! Lol I tried to post pics, but the site is acting up.

image-407708202.jpg
 
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shortdub78 said:
thank you girl! I get a kick out of doing this kind of stuff! I do it out of love. I love seeing people smile and making people feel special!
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I know, lord Jesus I'm so glad they are older and don't have parties like this anymore...:lachen:
I used to KILL myself on those parties.
My oldest son's first birthday party at school (head start :lachen:)
was a construction zone theme...OMG, cake had real hot wheels trucks with ground up chocolate cookies for dirt, hazard flags, stop signs, caution tape, the kids had hard hats...OMG I went OVERBOARD!
But he loved it....

You are a great mom.......
 
crlsweetie912 said:
I know, lord Jesus I'm so glad they are older and don't have parties like this anymore...:lachen: I used to KILL myself on those parties. My oldest son's first birthday party at school (head start :lachen:) was a construction zone theme...OMG, cake had real hot wheels trucks with ground up chocolate cookies for dirt, hazard flags, stop signs, caution tape, the kids had hard hats...OMG I went OVERBOARD! But he loved it.... You are a great mom.......
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wow! Sounds like a paarty! Lol I did a Lego theme last year. I had a construction site motif as well! I made Lego crayons, Candy Lego men for the cupcakes, etc... You are a good mommy! image-2908663045.jpg I made these cupcakes for my DD's bday last year! I gotta find my other pics! I made my kids teachers some nice gifts for Vday this year. I posted that in the crochet thread.


image-2013661465.jpg
 
Hey mama's, I just need to vent for a bit. Sometimes, I wish I had help. My son has been having a rough 3 weeks. I know something is going on, but I've yet to get it out of him. I need to find him a mentor, cause he's only 6 and very impressionable. He's surrounded by nothing but females and needs a positive male role model (very short supply). Sometimes I wish he was born a girl, but I'm glad he's my boy. I'm just under so much pressure...
 
whosthatcurl said:
Hey mama's, I just need to vent for a bit. Sometimes, I wish I had help. My son has been having a rough 3 weeks. I know something is going on, but I've yet to get it out of him. I need to find him a mentor, cause he's only 6 and very impressionable. He's surrounded by nothing but females and needs a positive male role model (very short supply). Sometimes I wish he was born a girl, but I'm glad he's my boy. I'm just under so much pressure...
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baseball season is coming up! Or look into Boy Scouts! He probably needs to let out some testosterone! I have two boys myself, so I know how you feel! I'm not saying this is you, but I don't engage my son in girly stuff. I don't watch girly programs, I don't take him to salons with me, etc... I know of a mom that loves to watch houses wives shows and Say Yes To The Dress with her son. She takes him everywhere with her! She doesn't let him go to children's church. He sits right with her! She treats him like her best girlfriend. She doesn't let him go out and play in fear of him getting dirty or hurt. I'm like that boy needs to be around some guys!
 
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