♥~♥ SINGLE MOTHERS SUPPORT THREAD! ♥~♥

Bublin if its who you are and you want to just because you're you and fabulous then by all means get the kids a gift! I dont think thats anything you'd ever regret doing.
 
We went on our first blended vacation together with his 14 and 16 year old daughters and my 5 year old. By the end of the trip they were all playing together and the oldest kept referring to my daughter as her little sister. I was pleased with how everything went for 7 days, seemed very relaxed and natural.
 
:look:
Hi everyone. First time here. I'm a single mom of a 15 y/o. My daughter's father is not involved at all. Sometimes I'm very happy for that blessing but I'm also sad for my dd.

I'm truly single. No SO for more than a year now. No current prospects either. My focus is my child, work, and school (I'm working on my Master's).
Umm...yeah. That's all I got for now. Happy to see this thread.
 
buttaflye03 said:
:look:
Hi everyone. First time here. I'm a single mom of a 15 y/o. My daughter's father is not involved at all. Sometimes I'm very happy for that blessing but I'm also sad for my dd.

I'm truly single. No SO for more than a year now. No current prospects either. My focus is my child, work, and school (I'm working on my Master's).
Umm...yeah. That's all I got for now. Happy to see this thread.
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Hello and welcome buttaflye03!
 
I'm slowly reading through all of the posts from the beginning. I appreciate the candid talk and advice. My dd is a sophomore in HS and I feel that I'm going to be all alone when she goes off to college. I love to see her progress and soar but I feel lonely. I need to get my life *Tamar voice* lol.
 
buttaflye03 said:
I'm slowly reading through all of the posts from the beginning. I appreciate the candid talk and advice. My dd is a sophomore in HS and I feel that I'm going to be all alone when she goes off to college. I love to see her progress and soar but I feel lonely. I need to get my life *Tamar voice* lol.
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:bighug:
It will happen. The hardest part will be starting to focus on YOU instead of all the focus being on your child. But it's worth it. Find a hobby, meet up group, take a class and you will start meeting new people and that will get the ball rolling.

I can't really share the news. But things are just starting to look up.

But why oh why did my son drop the only set of house keys down into the sewer last night. Nothing but a miracle (and a wire hanger) was responsible for me being able to get them out of there. If you would have seen us trying to fish them out. And it was almost like a magnet was at the end of the hanger and the keys just jumped on the end...:lachen: we were a sight on the ground out in the rain....:lachen:
 
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I just wanted to cheer you ladies on... I've never come in here cos I'm not a single mom, but I came in here yesterday, and was really encouraged and motivated by your stories. I mean you ladies are busting your behinds, raising kids all by yourselves, and here I am complaining constantly even though I have help. I am learning a lot about coping, and managing time, and just general life lessons. I probably can't contribute a lot but I may be asking some clarification questions, so I hope y'all don't mind having me in here.
 
buttaflye03 said:
I'm slowly reading through all of the posts from the beginning. I appreciate the candid talk and advice. My dd is a sophomore in HS and I feel that I'm going to be all alone when she goes off to college. I love to see her progress and soar but I feel lonely. I need to get my life *Tamar voice* lol.
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Start living your life now while she's still home :yep: For the first year after my divorce, I didn't date anybody but I went out a lot, took dance classes, became a Zumba fanatic, had solo movie dates with myself, lunch dates with friends, weekend trips with my besties etc..
 
JudithO said:
I just wanted to cheer you ladies on... I've never come in here cos I'm not a single mom, but I came in here yesterday, and was really encouraged and motivated by your stories. I mean you ladies are busting your behinds, raising kids all by yourselves, and here I am complaining constantly even though I have help. I am learning a lot about coping, and managing time, and just general life lessons. I probably can't contribute a lot but I may be asking some clarification questions, so I hope y'all don't mind having me in here.
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JudithO
That was a really sweet and thoughtful post. THANK YOU!!!! :bighug:
 
MuziqizLyfe said:
Start living your life now while she's still home :yep: For the first year after my divorce, I didn't date anybody but I went out a lot, took dance classes, became a Zumba fanatic, had solo movie dates with myself, lunch dates with friends, weekend trips with my besties etc..
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I agree. I signed up for meet-up groups |that interested me. I started going places without them and allowing me to be alone.

I am planning on leaving when the last one goes to college. I told my guy friend last night, my lease to my new home will be signed so the week after she is settled I am out. I have raised them and time for second half of my life. I will be there for them but I need to go.
 
MuziqizLyfe said:
Start living your life now while she's still home :yep: For the first year after my divorce, I didn't date anybody but I went out a lot, took dance classes, became a Zumba fanatic, had solo movie dates with myself, lunch dates with friends, weekend trips with my besties etc..
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Yeah I know I need to get out more. I'm a homebody so it's a struggle. Once I'm out, I usually have a great time but it's the process of getting there that's my problem. For many years I would feel guilt about being away from my daughter and now I just rather be in my comfy home. Like an old lady lol.

Eta: I don't think I'm comfortable in my own skin anymore.
 
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buttaflye03 said:
Yeah I know I need to get out more. I'm a homebody so it's a struggle. Once I'm out, I usually have a great time but it's the process of getting there that's my problem. For many years I would feel guilt about being away from my daughter and now I just rather be in my comfy home. Like an old lady lol.

Eta: I don't think I'm comfortable in my own skin anymore.
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Find one thing and go with that. I have guilt also bc I was home by myself as a kid until I had my son at 16. So leaving them for two hours was a struggle at first now I go when they have plans so it doesn't seem like I am neglecting them.
 
How do your children address the person you are dating? Someone has started up with that "aunt" stuff and it's kind of uncomfortable.
 
buttaflye03 said:
Yeah I know I need to get out more. I'm a homebody so it's a struggle. Once I'm out, I usually have a great time but it's the process of getting there that's my problem. For many years I would feel guilt about being away from my daughter and now I just rather be in my comfy home. Like an old lady lol.

Eta: I don't think I'm comfortable in my own skin anymore.
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Just take it one step at a time. But start somewhere and keep at it. You also want to think about the message you are sending to your daughter about living a full life. Now everyone has their own definition of what that means of course so chart your own coarse with things that are fun and fulfilling to you but don't put it off, she's watching and eating from you :yep: Hobbies, volunteer work, dating, cultivating friendships, exercise, sports,worship, travel, education etc All of those things and many more are out there for you to take part in :yep: Good luck!!
 
I did a search and found this thread. Being a parent, especially a single mom is nothing I ever imagined. I have times where I feel I am a bad mom but then when I talk to my nursing buddies that are mom's I feel a lot better. My daughter was sick last week in the middle of the night with horrible congestion and I was dead tired. I was so frustrated because I was so tired but I calmed down, gave her some medicine and laid in the bed with her. I had a nursing exam at 8 am and was a hour and a half late. I was relieved when my professor understood and let me take the test after class. I thought that test would be my worst grade...I was exhausted. When I checked my grades online I got a 90. I thank God for getting me through this whole semester with nearly an A average and figuring out how to deal with my 4 year old. It has been quite a semester.
 
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snugglez41685 said:
I did a search and found this thread. Being a parent, especially a single mom is nothing I ever imagined. I have times where I feel I am a bad mom but then when I talk to my nursing buddies that are mom's I feel a lot better. My daughter was sick last week in the middle of the night with horrible congestion and I was dead tired. I was so frustrated because I was so tired but I calmed down, gave her some medicine and laid in the bed with her. I had a nursing exam at 8 am and was a hour and a half late. I was relieved when my professor understood and let me take the test after class. I thought that test would be my worst grade...I was exhausted. When I checked my grades online I got a 90. I thank God for getting me through this whole semester with nearly an A average and figuring out how to deal with my 4 year old. It has been quite a semester.
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:bighug:
Welcome sis....so proud of you for persevering and keeping your dream of going to nursing school alive! It will be so worth it once you reach your goals!
 
Mothers....

I'm REALLY going through stress right now. If you got some strength energy, please send some my way...

1. trying to find a sitter for DD because...
2. won my job full time but the commute requires I leave home earlier and/or leave later
3. my dad is very ill with heart disease and is fading away, however...
4. he was very abusive so this is creating a lot of conflict for me
5. my mother is blind and challenged so is no help and requires care
6. so is my sister and requires care
7. mom and sis refusing professional help (like in-home aide from the state) so they are making this transition difficult
8. idk what to do with the boyfriend because of all the above right now

merry christmas :(
 
DarkJoy said:
Mothers....

I'm REALLY going through stress right now. If you got some strength energy, please send some my way...

1. trying to find a sitter for DD because...
2. won my job full time but the commute requires I leave home earlier and/or leave later
3. my dad is very ill with heart disease and is fading away, however...
4. he was very abusive so this is creating a lot of conflict for me
5. my mother is blind and challenged so is no help and requires care
6. so is my sister and requires care
7. mom and sis refusing professional help (like in-home aide from the state) so they are making this transition difficult
8. idk what to do with the boyfriend because of all the above right now

merry christmas :(
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Hugs sweetie
 
DarkJoy Darling, you have all the positive thoughts, prayers, and I'll even do the hokey-pokey for you. Yay for all the good stuff happening for you! It's going to be a tough decision, but you need to keep yourself 1st. If you fall apart, who is going to be there for you?
 
DarkJoy said:
Mothers....

I'm REALLY going through stress right now. If you got some strength energy, please send some my way...

1. trying to find a sitter for DD because...
2. won my job full time but the commute requires I leave home earlier and/or leave later
3. my dad is very ill with heart disease and is fading away, however...
4. he was very abusive so this is creating a lot of conflict for me
5. my mother is blind and challenged so is no help and requires care
6. so is my sister and requires care
7. mom and sis refusing professional help (like in-home aide from the state) so they are making this transition difficult
8. idk what to do with the boyfriend because of all the above right now

merry christmas :(
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DarkJoy

Sending lots of good vibes and energy your way. I'vw got my own overwhelmed list over here & I think the holidays just add stress...hang in there!
 
Prayers to you DarkJoy, I hope you can come to terms for the best decision to make for YOUR needs. Your DD comes first so continue to look out for her best interest. You can confide in your SO for support; this will be a major test to see if SO can provide empathy and comfort when going through trying times. As far as your mother and sister, you have to do what's best for you and them- you're not a mule. Perhaps you can get a visiting nurse or aid, that may ease your load a little and your sister and mother may feel more comfortable vs a live in aid. I'm sorry about your father and I understand the stress you're going through and the resentment you must feel regarding past abuse. Are you POA for both of your parents?
 
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