♥~♥ SINGLE MOTHERS SUPPORT THREAD! ♥~♥

Welcome back felic1! Sounds like you have a lot on your plate. Glad you are here to share.
________

OAN

If DD were with her daddy, I'd snatch up my BFF for a night of bar hopping. I really. want. to. get. my. drunk. on. :spinning:

And I rarely drink. Maybe 3 or 4 x a year besides the polite sip in social gatherings.

Next weekend then. :yep:
 
DarkJoy said:
That scum! I take it he is single crlsweetie912? yea. I agree. court time... :ohwell:
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My ex withheld maintainence for 18 months and wasn't single and of course I was. To this day he gives what the government says he should give and not a pea more. Not a toy passes into my house yet he calls dd his princess.
It's not about the kids it's about us. Sadly they are pawns.
 
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crlsweetie912 said:
No. Up until he found out I was seeing someone he always took excellent care of our son.
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....And that's why I always encourage women to go the "way of the contracts"...so that you have some legal leverage because men tend to act the fool when they get a new woman or when you get a new man...sorry you're going through this.
 
IronButterfly said:
Uh-oh! Time to go to court. Child support is not dependent on your personal happiness.
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Thank you everyone for the advice. Child support here in our state is a joke. They never actually go after it. I have orders for my other two children and it's never paid. He always paid directly to me. I know what you are all saying but it's not cut and dried like that.
 
crlsweetie912 said:
Thank you everyone for the advice. Child support here in our state is a joke. They never actually go after it. I have orders for my other two children and it's never paid. He always paid directly to me. I know what you are all saying but it's not cut and dried like that.
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In my state, you have to pursue it as well.
So you need to go to the office and have them pull up your case to get a court date. U may need to update some information too. You may request to have it taken out of his check. I'm sorry you are going through this. My friend gets bare minimum. She only gets $50 a month and dude was asking to be taken off, since it is so hard for him right now.

They look at this stuff as some sort of bill, or like the custodial parent is a bill collector.

As far as dating, has anyone had issues with their child's father causing problems? Like he just won't let you move on? How do you handle that?
 
crlsweetie912 said:
Thank you everyone for the advice. Child support here in our state is a joke. They never actually go after it. I have orders for my other two children and it's never paid. He always paid directly to me. I know what you are all saying but it's not cut and dried like that.
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I can relate. When I tried to get child support for my daughter, they would act like they couldn't find him. I contact them when he was in jail. They do nothing and finally closed the case because I was done trying to keep up with his whereabouts for no follow through. It wasn't worth the trouble.
 
Bublin said:
Nah everything gets listed on ebay...even if it goes for 99p. The stuff that doesn't sell goes into bags that i take to a Cash For Clothes place. Large items - like an old wardrobe that would have been hassle to remove, I advertised on Gumtree (your Craigslist). Someone paid me £20 to take it!
Charity begins at home.

I buy what I can online as most sites are now partnered with cashback sites - Quidco and TopCashBack.
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Great ideas. I have sold on Ebay before. But, it can be so time consuming taking pictures, creating listings etc., But, that's a part of the process. I am off a couple days this month for dd winter break, so I need to get off my rear-end and post some items. :-)
 
sunnydaze said:
MzSwift

My 7 yr old daughter does want me to have a boyfriend though.:ohwell:

I found this out after she told one of her friend's mom this at a sleepover. The mom said they were looking up at stars and that is what she wished for me. I was feeling some kind of way about it at first, almost embarrassed that she would say that to someone. Started wondering what I am doing wrong; Do I not come across happy to her (b/c I am)? Do I come across lonely for a man (I'm not)? I was taken aback.

After a bit though, I saw that it was coming from a sweet, honest and surprisingly mature place. She wants to see mommy with a nice man and that is a natural thing. Funny, she still seems boys as gross and yuck, but at the same time wants to see mommy with a boyfriend.

Mandatory positive - I guess that's a nice thing to know for whenever the day comes that I get in a real relationship with someone and start to bring him around.
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Wish my dd felt the same way.. she told me that she doesn't want me to date and that I should be all she needs... ugh Of course her dad is remarried, and she is okay with that. lol
 
TayMac said:
I can relate. When I tried to get child support for my daughter, they would act like they couldn't find him. I contact them when he was in jail. They do nothing and finally closed the case because I was done trying to keep up with his whereabouts for no follow through. It wasn't worth the trouble.
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Ditto.. I don't get a dime cuz my ex is broke and lives in his momma house, along with his new wife.. smh
 
Jazzmommy said:
Great ideas. I have sold on Ebay before. But, it can be so time consuming taking pictures, creating listings etc., But, that's a part of the process. I am off a couple days this month for dd winter break, so I need to get off my rear-end and post some items. :-)
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I treat it as a hobby. If you have a tablet, listing is very quick.
I just sold an empty biscuit tin for £5! It was a Fortnum & Mason tin that I was given as a gift. They're collectable. After the contents were gobbled up I looked on ebay and other tins had bids so I thought I'd list mine. Remember what you don't want, someone else will.
 
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What's up with these dudes asking to be taken off of CS? DS's dad has asked me a couple if times within the last year. He hasn't worked since May/June and I haven't seen a check since then! I tried to be considerate and asked him to pay for DS's school lunch... $20 a week! He has not paid for one day!!!! And he has worked odd jobs since then. But, you want me to take you off CS and depend on you to actually give me money??? No sir! I'm not upset about it... But, I'm not taking him off CS! He didn't even call them to get a modification due to being unemployed because he doesn't want to have to report his business to them... In the mean time, back child support is adding up every month. Things are really tight now as I don't receive the assistance I was receiving from my job anymore either but, we'll be fine. DS is in Catholic School so $$$.
 
California is weird. Even though I've always had DD slightly more than 50% of the time...at some points 70% when he was out chasing tail :rolleyes: he could come after ME for CS simply because I make more money. We just discussed this last week as we were filing out divorce papers.

I'm the one who always buys her health, life and dental insurance premiums, clothes, school supplies, finds and fronts the cash for summer day care and camps plus her year round extracurriculars, makes sure her hair is did and she's groomed otherwise AND keep her socialized with other kids her age which can cost depending on venue. He doesnt provide any of these things up front. Some he will reimburse half later. I also keep her in much larger accomdations w/off the chain rent and buy all the bells and whistles she needs and some things she wants.

He says he will sign the waiver of my state obligation for CS for these reasons. He's trying to be gracious, but really it's his pride. He mooched off me for 20 years. He's turning 40 in a few months. ABout time the idiot got a clue.
 
DarkJoy said:
California is weird. Even though I've always had DD slightly more than 50% of the time...at some points 70% when he was out chasing tail :rolleyes: he could come after ME for CS simply because I make more money. We just discussed this last week as we were filing out divorce papers.

I'm the one who always buys her health, life and dental insurance premiums, clothes, school supplies, finds and fronts the cash for summer day care and camps plus her year round extracurriculars, makes sure her hair is did and she's groomed otherwise AND keep her socialized with other kids her age which can cost depending on venue. He doesnt provide any of these things up front. Some he will reimburse half later. I also keep her in much larger accomdations w/off the chain rent and buy all the bells and whistles she needs and some things she wants.

He says he will sign the waiver of my state obligation for CS for these reasons. He's trying to be gracious, but really it's his pride. He mooched off me for 20 years. He's turning 40 in a few months. ABout time the idiot got a clue.
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My ex is pride-less.. He wanted full custody or 50/50 split because I make way more money and would have to give him CS. I settled on me having her 76% of time, so most I could get is maybe 20.00 a month. smh.. not worth it
 
Bublin said:
@DarkJoy well ain't that darn decent of him. How nice of him to 'waiver' your CS.
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:lol: IKR?
Jazzmommy said:
My ex is pride-less.. He wanted full custody or 50/50 split because I make way more money and would have to give him CS. I settled on me having her 76% of time, so most I could get is maybe 20.00 a month. smh.. not worth it
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Wow. That really isn't worth it. :S Whats up with these greedy bastards that only want to look at dollars and cents and not the morality of the situation?

The State calculated mine to be over $300 a month--california is insane with it. That would put us out of this townhouse and into an apartment near the 'hood with the amount of debt I'm paying off. So if he tries to get funny, I'll warn him of this. At the least he cares enough for her not to want her raised in the ghetto.

If he does get funny, well, I make way more than him and can afford a good attorney who would not be so nice...
 
I don't know if you have them in the US but I bought for my 4 yr old dd a Dream Light Pillow Pet. The advert for them is on every 5 minutes and she has been begging. Poor child I always feel like Im saying no to her. Anyway, I surprised her by taking her to ToyRUs today and we bought one.
At bedtime we turned it on, laid on our backs and looked at the ceiling full of stars. We made up stories of being in outer space. She fell alseep hugging it.
Money well spent.
 
LOL. @Bublin. We got that exact one in the unicorn. lol. plus two light pillows with regular LED lights inside. :) These as seen on TV as well:

stuff-0107.jpg
 
lol deltadreamland. No fire hazard. I'm also sure the fabrics are treated with flame retardants and these are LED lights. Not any heat to speak of.

OAN. Happy Monday! Woke up to a flat tire. It was leaking and low end of last week so I filled it and prayed it would last til today so I could get it to the shop. Nope. Walked DD to school. Called the car service to put on my spare costing me money. Brand new tire too so the good thing is its on warranty. Luckily, no work today.

How's everyone else's week starting?
 
Signed DD up for a new montessori school... Applied for a side gig, and enjoyed lunch by myself....

In this part of town there are LOTS of men, but if I frequent these joints the men will probably just usually sit and stare. Ugh. Why are WM scared to talk to us? I've been hit on by 2 BM today, no shade but it's not the kind of man (thuggy) I'm after. Meeting guys in bars and clubs is just :nono: I'm going to try smiling and see where it goes.. Lol.

OAN: DD came back from her dad's wheezing! Nobody bothered to call me or say anything! She came home with a headache and pale faced... I gave her an inhaler and kept a eye on her. I know not everyone is a nurse but damn! Use common sense hillbillies...! I giggle inside bc she sounded like a little squeaky mouse, poor kid...

Enjoying this sunshine and subsequent vitamin D, let's have a great week ladies!

Sent from my iPad using LHCF
 
I went out and my tire was flat again. I went to the Discount tire store where I had the tires insured. I got one at the insurance price and the other long trail tire at a discount. $150.00. well, I have to have functional tires to be safe. At least I had the money to fix it. I have some type of wheel drive 4 or all.
 
DarkJoy said:
lol deltadreamland. No fire hazard. I'm also sure the fabrics are treated with flame retardants and these are LED lights. Not any heat to speak of.

OAN. Happy Monday! Woke up to a flat tire. It was leaking and low end of last week so I filled it and prayed it would last til today so I could get it to the shop. Nope. Walked DD to school. Called the car service to put on my spare costing me money. Brand new tire too so the good thing is its on warranty. Luckily, no work today.

How's everyone else's week starting?
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Hey all.. fighting a cold and dealing with my sassy tween.. ugh. Just had to put my foot down and take away the IPOD for 3 days.. have to show her I mean business. yep
 
Jazzmommy said:
Hey all.. fighting a cold and dealing with my sassy tween.. ugh. Just had to put my foot down and take away the IPOD for 3 days.. have to show her I mean business. yep
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Yes, they try you...my youngest bday is Friday and I don't think she going to make it. She might be looking for some dentures. She has one more time and no bday activities. Her older sister had no 15 bday celebration and she close to spending get 15th the same way.
 
All4Tris said:
What's up with these dudes asking to be taken off of CS? DS's dad has asked me a couple if times within the last year. He hasn't worked since May/June and I haven't seen a check since then! I tried to be considerate and asked him to pay for DS's school lunch... $20 a week! He has not paid for one day!!!! And he has worked odd jobs since then. But, you want me to take you off CS and depend on you to actually give me money??? No sir! I'm not upset about it... But, I'm not taking him off CS! He didn't even call them to get a modification due to being unemployed because he doesn't want to have to report his business to them... In the mean time, back child support is adding up every month. Things are really tight now as I don't receive the assistance I was receiving from my job anymore either but, we'll be fine. DS is in Catholic School so $$$.
Click to expand...

I am waiting for the annual can I carry a child text...well since he is blocked on my phone not this year.

They are a mess, I have to pay CS $25 to take over my private case, smh, I am tired of going and filing myself. I haven't gotten a some support since October.
 
3jsmom said:
Yes, they try you...my youngest bday is Friday and I don't think she going to make it. She might be looking for some dentures. She has one more time and no bday activities. Her older sister had no 15 bday celebration and she close to spending get 15th the same way.
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:rofl:

Dang, 3jsmom goes hard!
 
3jsmom said:
Yes, they try you...my youngest bday is Friday and I don't think she going to make it. She might be looking for some dentures. She has one more time and no bday activities. Her older sister had no 15 bday celebration and she close to spending get 15th the same way.
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Hmm.. I might be too soft. lol
My tween is smelling herself for real.. i had to stop popping her though.. i didn't want to lose control..
 
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