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Raspberry: I think this is something that everyone kinda has to sort through themselves, and the last thing I would want to do is to discourage another woman in her hope for a mate. So what I write, I write only as reflective of where I am today and not necessarily where I'll be tomorrow, or where I think other people should be.
That said, with the quote you mentioned,
where my head is today about God's promises is that a promise is a specific spoken word that God is going to do something particular; and we can have faith that He will do it because He has said that it will be. There are lots of things that God specifically promises believers that we know for a fact will come to pass--like a resurrected body. But there are other things that He hasn't specifically promised, but we take to Him as our good Father, asking that He would grant us this thing if He is willing. Jesus never told anyone "no" when they asked Him for something, but we also know lots of people with handicaps, illnesses, etc. who have not received their requests from the Lord. He has allowed them to remain as they are even though they pray. Essentially, He's allowed them to be subject to the fallenness of this world.
With respect to singleness, I think that many Christian women, myself included, are simply experiencing the fallenness of this world. Once, a missionary to an obscure Eastern European country came to speak at my church, and he pointed out that in the midst of this great spiritual revival and spreading of the Gospel, many of the young women remained single. And he said this was the case because more of them had embraced the Gospel than men and so there weren't suitable mates for them. He characterized their singleness as a result of obedience and faithfulness to Christ. And thus they were not discouraged by their situation, but took comfort in the fact that their burden was the result of walking faithfully with God.
I know that there are a lot of women in our society, black women in particular, who feel like it's ultra-difficult to meet a good man or be pursued by a good man, godly or not. Honestly, this has not been my issue. My problem has been continually having to break off burgeoning relationships with "good black men" because they are not godly. For that reason, to keep myself from either compromising my faith by entertaining these relationships or becoming bitter and confused as to why things have not manifested for me, I meditate on sacrificial obedience to Christ; that's what
my singleness is right now, as were I to choose to do things my own way (by not holding to Christ's standards), I think my state in life would be otherwise. I can't know that for certain of course, but it's true as far as I can tell. So I have to continually take myself back to Jesus' words that whoever wishes to follow Him must first deny herself and take up her cross. [not to imply that I do this successfully, btw. I rarely manage to have the right attitude.] However, singleness may mean something entirely different for another woman.
I don't presume to know what will happen in the future, though I really don't expect that I will end up permanently single. But thinking about the possibility that I could end up that way for me isn't about giving up the desire for marriage so much as it's about subordinating it to my call to live faithfully and joyfully regardless of what state I am in. I know that the Lord has heard my prayers, know that He knows me, and know that if He desires that something come to pass, it will be. But I can't mentally and emotionally handle the constant looking and wondering that pouring energy into the husband question produces in me. And the quoted passage was my way of handling it.
Since I moved I've been attracting a lot of yougin's, from 18 (yes 18!) to 23. In their defense I look really young for 33, but I want a guy my own age!
He called yesterday and passed his phone over to a man who wanted to speak to me. He seemed nice so we exchanged numbers. Later that day when he called I asked, "So how long have you known Sean?", and he replied, "Oh we just met today!"
Matchmaker FAIL! Plus this guy had the audacity to call me 6 times in a row while I was on another call. Immediate turnoff!
i'll be subscribing to this thread....but I just wanted to post that I got baptized last weekend and I feel 
inside.....I broke up with the ex on my birthday 2 mths prior and this past wknd i deleted alot of phone numbers...Things are the same but then nothing is the same.....
