***Random Thoughts: RELATIONSHIP FORUM***

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My big date is Thursday. I am going to wash my hair tonight and do a braid out. :look: I think I am getting kind of excited.

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hmmm his nature makes me nervous. He is King Charisma. This one has game for days. Can smooth talk his way into and out of any and everything. My mother has always commented how people are drawn to him because of his charismatic nature. He's also a bit of a commitment-phobe, even though he doesnt think so.....

I used to joke that he was the JFK to my Jackie-O. lol He's an extreme extrovert and I'm an extreme introvert. I'm very suspicious of anyone that's so good with people the way he is....Certain things I don't mind, it is what it is and comes with the territory of being with someone like him. But there is a line, I'mma be damned if I'm gonna be the one that gets played..... I don't want to be just another random girl on the list...

barbiesocialite OK, I take back my nonconcern/acceptance of his people-pleasing behavior. I am an extreme introvert. I DO NOT TRUST people who are extremely charismatic extroverts. That was my ex. :nono: Those are the kind that play to your feelings just to get over on you. I play to your feelings so I don't get hurt. Big difference. :yep:
 
@barbiesocialite OK, I take back my nonconcern/acceptance of his people-pleasing behavior. I am an extreme introvert. I DO NOT TRUST people who are extremely charismatic extroverts. That was my ex. :nono: Those are the kind that play to your feelings just to get over on you. I play to your feelings so I don't get hurt. Big difference. :yep:

now you see why I'm an iceberg with him most of the time....he needs to move mountains and swim oceans before I take him seriously.

it's funny, he already knows to start explaining himself before I even have to ask. :lol:

it is what it is. Right now I'm happy, not tryna read into anything.If a problem presents itself, I'll deal with it then. In the meantime, I'll enjoy my time with dude and remember that I'm single-til-married :grin:
 
@barbiesocialite ah ok, I feel you. Are you in a relationship with him or is it still dating stages? That personality is a gift and a curse :sad:

If you ask me, we are dating. We are gonna keep being in dating-phase until I see an engagement ring and there are plans to set a wedding date.

Then again, he also believe like I do: single until married. Obligations and responsibilities are--and should be--limited unless you plan on marrying that person. This is part of the reason why we aren't having sex (we accidentally had sex once a few years ago, NA at present tho). He knows, because I've said it and we've discussed it multiple times, that sex for us is not an option unless he plans on marrying me. He has agreed and seems to respect these conditions of my commitment. He's very good at holding back and respecting my boundaries, which I appreciate. It's not ok for him to have sex with anyone else either, which he has also agreed to and I periodically ask him "who you f*ckin?" :look: At the same time, I'm wondering why he is so ok with this :look:.....
 
If you ask me, we are dating. We are gonna keep being in dating-phase until I see an engagement ring and there are plans to set a wedding date.

Then again, he also believe like I do: single until married. Obligations and responsibilities are--and should be--limited unless you plan on marrying that person. This is part of the reason why we aren't having sex (we accidentally had sex once a few years ago, NA at present tho). He knows, because I've said it and we've discussed it multiple times, that sex for us is not an option unless he plans on marrying me. He has agreed and seems to respect these conditions of my commitment. He's very good at holding back and respecting my boundaries, which I appreciate. It's not ok for him to have sex with anyone else either, which he has also agreed to and I periodically ask him "who you f*ckin?" :look: At the same time, I'm wondering why he is so ok with this :look:.....

Lol I would wonder too unless his faith is really that effective in keeping it in his pants :look:
 
When we're up, we're up. When we're down, we're down. But either way...you light my body on fire.

Sent from my pretty red Inspire, excuse the typos!
 
*text message*
Him:Hey
Me: Who is this?
Him: wow, really
Me: im sorry, I dont know who this is

For real? After not responding to texts or returning phone calls, the best you got is "Hey"? I got one better, BYE.

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i did the right thing. you are so silent and you love women to chase you. i cant do that. i though we were grown. to be honest with our opinions. not just bailout and and forget your vocal chords work. so here i am, liking someone who doesnt think i am good enough. i liked him sight unseen. then sight made it better.
i am silently walking away. praying for strength to keep walking.
 
The finest dude I have ever seen (through pics) is texting me. My shy arze don't even know what to say. I am shy and he has 10 times as many friends as I do on facebook, and 75% of them are these hot chicks. Gahhhhh

Maybe I need to fall back, this dude is definitely not in my league, he seems so open, and I have trouble even letting my family in sometimes.

This happened last year too. The hottest guy on campus (seriously) got my number and we were texting but I just let him go cuz I thought he would think I was weird. Now we avoid eye contact because I would avert my eyes anytime we saw each other.

I am a strange girl, lol.

You are a Woman, no one is out of your league!
 
So, last night I went out with this guy for dinner. We're sitting there having a nice lil convo and we notice the "boot man" pull up in front of the restaurant. He becomes a little anxious because apparently he's on the boot list. He get's up, walks to the window and checks on his truck and basically makes an announcement to the entire restaurant that he's on the boot list... Can you say embarrassed.com! It only takes 2 tickets at a delinquency status to get on the boot list here, but seriously dude... You basically made a scene!
 
barbiesocialite OK, I take back my nonconcern/acceptance of his people-pleasing behavior. I am an extreme introvert. I DO NOT TRUST people who are extremely charismatic extroverts. That was my ex. :nono: Those are the kind that play to your feelings just to get over on you. I play to your feelings so I don't get hurt. Big difference. :yep:

barbiesocialite and rafikichick92, that sounds like my ex too. And I am also very introverted. I am weary of super-extroverts. Why a lot of them seem to seek out introverts, I don't know.
In the case of my ex, he seriously tried to make me believe he was just misunderstood, mischaracterized by people as an extreme extrovert and womanizer... and then it turns out that that's what it was after all. I do not trust extremely charismatic extroverts either.
 
@barbiesocialite and @rafikichick92, that sounds like my ex too. And I am also very introverted. I am weary of super-extroverts. Why a lot of them seem to seek out introverts, I don't know.
In the case of my ex, he seriously tried to make me believe he was just misunderstood, mischaracterized by people as an extreme extrovert and womanizer... and then it turns out that that's what it was after all. I do not trust extremely charismatic extroverts either.

It's really conflicting for me because I've normalized extroverted males in my mind even though I'm an introvert. My fave grandfather and the men in my family I've idolized the most are charismatic extroverts (even though their wives aren't)--they might be womanizers, I wouldnt put it past them but I don't know because they keep that sorta thing away from the "children" in my fam; and mother has always emphasized the need for a man to be extroverted, be fairly busy and that he should have lots of friends because it's masculine (note: my father is the only introverted male in my fam and my mother considers him feminine :look:). So the way SO is behaving is pretty much what I've learned to expect as normal. On that note, that's also probably why I live by "go looking, and you will find"--I never go looking, and don't want to know anything that's not in front of my face. :look:

Believe it or not, this is one of my lower stress relationships :look:
 
It's really conflicting for me because I've normalized extroverted males in my mind even though I'm an introvert. My fave grandfather and the men in my family I've idolized the most are charismatic extroverts (even though their wives aren't)--they might be womanizers, I wouldnt put it past them but I don't know because they keep that sorta thing away from the "children" in my fam; and mother has always emphasized the need for a man to be extroverted, be fairly busy and that he should have lots of friends because it's masculine (note: my father is the only introverted male in my fam and my mother considers him feminine :look:). So the way SO is behaving is pretty much what I've learned to expect as normal. On that note, that's also probably why I live by "go looking, and you will find"--I never go looking, and don't want to know anything that's not in front of my face. :look:

Believe it or not, this is one of my lower stress relationships :look:

Hmm, very interesting. My father is extremely extroverted too, and my mother is an extreme introvert.
All the guys I've dated are extroverted. To be honest, I don't even know if/think that I'd like an introverted male. Some are cute and adorable... but... that's it:lol:
I am conflicted. I like certain aspects of that quality... I just want a guy who doesn't let it go to his head, you know? Someone who is loved by people, but down to earth and unpretentious about it. That's the hard part.

I think what I want is an extrovert who is putty in my hands:yep::lachen:, and who can bring out some of the extrovert in me.

And yeah, to not go looking-- I think that's the way to go. I think I almost went crazy when I wanted to know everything:ohwell: that's why I had to flee that relationship.
 
So, I realize that I haven't been doing a lot of the things that I love, as of late. Haven't been to my weekend dance class in ages.

This guy, a friend of a friend, was like: invite me to go next time you're going! (about a month back).
So, I followed up and told him that I would be going and if he wanted to join me. Of course, he was like: i'd love to dance with you, but I can't make it this wknd, I'm out of town.

Fool, this is not to dance WITH me... no. Alongside me and about 50+ other people. And he's being extra flirtatious. Some days, I just want to be like: these comments are not welcome (to him and to other men).

I told our mutual (male) friend about him asking me to invite him. He goes: huh? for what? don't listen to him... and don't invite him:lachen:

I was chatting with my brother the other night and he told me that one of his rules is to not date friends of friends-- I may have to adopt that as well. It never seems to work.
 
Keshieshimmer, I seen your post and I definitely know how you feel because I'm in the same boat :bighug:. I pray and try to be optimistic about my situation as well but it does get hard and I'm glad this thread is here so we all can vent and uplift one another.
 
Another one bites the dust. This one was cute, Hispanic, molecular biology major, smart, good grades, kind of flirting with me BUT I had heard rumors from people in the department that he is a liar and a cheater (i.e., on tests).

Yesterday, the opportunity for investigation presented itself (yesterday was a good day for getting dirt on people apparently ...) and I took it. We were both at a movie showing at my school yesterday, so I made it a point to sit by him and talk to him. We talked for about 15 minutes and he told so many obvious lies it wasn't even funny. I called him out a couple of times and he just insisted that he was telling the truth.

Needless to say, he is no longer in the rotation. I'll probably keep him as an acquaintance because it's good to know and be on good terms with people in your department, but I'll be sleeping with one eye open when it comes to him. Next!
 
I have a HUGE crush on this guy at work. I feel like a 15 year old again. Every time I see him my heart starts beating faster and I feel all giddy on the inside.

I wonder if our feelings are mutual cause he starts acting weird too when we see each other in passing, messing up his word phrasing and what not. Last time he got tongue-tied trying to say good-bye. :giggle:

I heart him.
 
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