raising the child of your man's AFFAIR? WOULD YOU?

[Enchantmt]

This thread has been reported. Can you kindly watch the language used please? TY

 

[sky_blu]

If he cheated, yes I'd leave. If we broke up and got back together and during that period he made the mistake, I may stay. It depends on the dynamic of our relationship. Everyone makes mistakes but I wouldnt punish a child that didnt ask to be put in that environment.

This situation happened to the guy Im dealing with now. His mother actually left his father and in the meantime he had another kid. Then his mother came back and they got remarried and they had another kid together. Thats weird to me but oh well.

 

[SqrpioQutie]

no, he is not still with the woman. he has been to counseling and they go together and they have accepted to move on. she forgave him.

however, imo, the new "move" is left over remnants from the old relationship.

we don't believe he is still cheating.

but how can you sleep at night knowing that you are doing something another woman taught your HUSBAND while he was cheating on you?

it's just f'd up all the way around.

yeah...

i guess i'm just one hard-hearted chick - cuz counseling or not, making the decision to forgive or not, i still feel like homey is getting played simply because there are still reminders of that relationship, and in the BEDROOM at that...

your people are way more patient than i...

 

[Cloud06]

You know, my boyfriend just proposed this question to me the other day. He told me that about two years ago, (pre-relationship) he slept with a girl and about three months he got a friends of the Court notice to pay up for his one year old son he did not know existed. He asked if I would be the "motherly" influence to his son, since the birth mom did not want to take care of the boy.

IDK, he got upset at me because he thought I should stay. I know it happened while we were not together but we've been friends for over seven years. And he waited three months to let me know about an ex-fling.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

If my kids were still under 18, I'd stay with him for thier sake. *However* my children would never hear of this bastard. They would never see this bastard. The bastard child BETTER NOT cross one pinky toe onto my property, OR the mother of said bastard.

I'm in between on this one. If I was married to a man whose finances significantly upgraded the lifestyle my children would have then I'd stay and it would be a marriage in name only. To hell with child support, if you're married you got access to ALL the money, not just some. But if I could make it on my own, then I'd leave and work out some visitation.

But I definitely agree that the outside kids have no business interacting with the inside ones. That is too much grown folks business to make children privy to.

 

[14got]

oo wowerplexed
so it's fair to the child to find out about a sister or brother 18-20 years later
just remember that actions and REACTIONS can Tarnish the memories of your precious seeds
it's nothing like finding out about the childish choices made by the "adults" in your life

 

[MizAvalon]

I'm a big believer in forever families and lifelong marriages. There are dealbreakers, though: abuse (of spouse OR kids) or abandonment. In my view, exposing me to disease and destroying the wholeness of our family equals abuse.

If my kids were still under 18, I'd stay with him for thier sake. *However* my children would never hear of this bastard. They would never see this bastard. The bastard child BETTER NOT cross one pinky toe onto my property, OR the mother of said bastard.

I would expect DH to send checks to support said bastard, and maybe visit with the CHILD ONLY (babymomma not welcome) at the park or someplace. And once my children were all grown and graduated from college, he and I would split.

I know people like to think that they would not harbor ill-will toward the bastard... but frankly it would be near impossible not to. I guess we have 50-11 Mother Theresa clones on here, but I'm not among them.

DH and I have talked about this, and he is so much more accepting than me... he said if I stepped out and got up the pole by someone he'd raise the kid in our home with our kids and treat them all the same. I let him know that I do NOT agree and would not accept such behavior.

Wow, that is really something. Most men would never dream of raising an outside child. Or at least they say they wouldn't.

 

[MizAvalon]

oo wowerplexed
so it's fair to the child to find out about a sister or brother 18-20 years later
just remember that actions and REACTIONS can Tarnish the memories of your precious seeds
it's nothing like finding out about the childish choices made by the "adults" in your life

Definitely a difficult situation but Dad and the outside woman are the ones that chose to ruin everyone's life. Dad is especially wrong. Destroying his family and exposing them to diseases?

 

[14got]

I understand all that
but not even KNOWING you have a brother/sister
that HURTs
I'm talking from experience

 

[peanutsgrl1]

My parents have 8 children together and my father had a son on the side. I will never forget the day my mother took us to visit my dad at work and his pregnant woman on the side was there. I was very young so I didn't know what was going on just that my mother was not happy when we left. Flash forward to when I was 16 and my dad passed from cancer and on the day of his funeral I see this little boy maybe 2 or 3 who looked like the splitting image of my father at the funeral home. We (my brothers and sisters) were like what the heck is going on here. We all accepted him as our brother none of us hated him or were angry we just saw him as our brother. I am not saying that I would accept my husbands child if he cheated however I would not or could not ever have ill feelings for a child that did not ask to be brought into that mess. I would let my daughter know her sibling. I still to this day have contact with my brother granted its not the same as my other siblings but we know each other. If it were up to my mother we would never know that he exists and that is not fair. I am just trying to explain it from the side of a person who has experienced it. I can't answer what I would if it happened to me because you never know until the situation happens. I just have faith that my dh is not out there like that.

 

[dede1174]

i would not resent the child . not the baby's fault at all. As far as keeping him . hummmmmmmm. i know people who had to deal w/ an affair...and they realized they loved each only to have the girl come back preggers.

i'm not sure how i would deal with seeing a walking talking symbol of infidelity.

 

[Ramya]

oo wowerplexed
so it's fair to the child to find out about a sister or brother 18-20 years later
just remember that actions and REACTIONS can Tarnish the memories of your precious seeds
it's nothing like finding out about the childish choices made by the "adults" in your life

This is what I was thinking too. I was shocked that so many wouldn't let their children meet their brother/sister. I would want to know. and honestly I would sit down with DH and the OW and talk about what will happen after the baby is born. I want the baby to be apart of my children's lives. If that means putting on my big girl panties...then so be it.

 

[firecracker]

oo wowerplexed
so it's fair to the child to find out about a sister or brother 18-20 years later
just remember that actions and REACTIONS can Tarnish the memories of your precious seeds
it's nothing like finding out about the childish choices made by the "adults" in your life

The two that concieved the child should have thought about the ramification of their actions on that childs future etc from the giddyup.

Yes its fair for the child to find out at 18 that his mother was slutty enough to sleep with a married man, have no shame in conceiving a married man's child, then the damn nerve to assume that said child has a right to anything outside of a damn "get outta the cheats face"support check. (eddie murphy comes to mind)

Its not anyone elses responsiblity to try to right those two fools wrong or be inconvienced for the shamed seed.

If my quality of life would plunge significately due to divorcing a cheating hubby I'd probably stay.
I'm not talking about being married, juggling and struggling with kids. Nor staying with a broke **** just to say the other woman didn't get em.

 

[Bint Yusef]

The two that concieved the child should have thought about the ramification of their actions on that childs future etc from the giddyup.

Yes its fair for the child to find out at 18 that his mother was slutty enough to sleep with a married man, have no shame in conceiving a married man's child, then the damn nerve to assume that said child has a right to anything outside of a damn "get outta the cheats face"support check. (eddie murphy comes to mind)

Its not anyone elses responsiblity to try to right those two fools wrong or be inconvienced for the shamed seed.

If my quality of life would plunge significately due to divorcing a cheating hubby I'd probably stay.
I'm not talking about being married, juggling and struggling with kids. Nor staying with a broke **** just to say the other woman didn't get em.

I totally agree. He gets to go cheat, make a baby, then the child wants to look at their mother who has been played up and down sideways for not putting up with that ish and playing "nice".............ummm you can gone with your cheating daddy and his love child if you wanna be mad about it too....So she gets goo on her face from all parties around...um no, not gone be able to do .... Get grown and then you can decide what you wanna do, but as the momma Im making the decisions and you aint gonna make feel guilty because your daddy cheated and you wanna know the other child.......you need to be mad at him for upsetting the household and quality of life as he is the one that put you all in the situation to begin with.

 

[Nefertiti0906]

oo wowerplexed
so it's fair to the child to find out about a sister or brother 18-20 years later
just remember that actions and REACTIONS can Tarnish the memories of your precious seeds
it's nothing like finding out about the childish choices made by the "adults" in your life

I agree, two wrongs don't make a right.

Just because some joker disrepected you, it gives you no right to do the same to someone who didn't ask to be born...

 

[firecracker]

I agree, two wrongs don't make a right.

Just because some joker disrepected you, it gives you no right to do the same to someone who didn't ask to be born...

Hey thats a good one for the mother of the lovechild to ponder. She happens to be responsible for HER childs wellbeing and healthy development on all levels. Time to be that childs everythang and put her own life on hold. You can't go forcing your bs on somebody that doesn't want to be bothered and that you help slight. Most women simply won't do this no matter how loving and nurturing.

Again I would be accepting of the child for a ssi check.

 

[LunadeMiel]

The two that concieved the child should have thought about the ramification of their actions on that childs future etc from the giddyup.

Yes its fair for the child to find out at 18 that his mother was slutty enough to sleep with a married man, have no shame in conceiving a married man's child, then the damn nerve to assume that said child has a right to anything outside of a damn "get outta the cheats face"support check. (eddie murphy comes to mind)

Its not anyone elses responsiblity to try to right those two fools wrong or be inconvienced for the shamed seed.

If my quality of life would plunge significately due to divorcing a cheating hubby I'd probably stay.
I'm not talking about being married, juggling and struggling with kids. Nor staying with a broke **** just to say the other woman didn't get em.

I totally agree. He gets to go cheat, make a baby, then the child wants to look at their mother who has been played up and down sideways for not putting up with that ish and playing "nice".............ummm you can gone with your cheating daddy and his love child if you wanna be mad about it too....So she gets goo on her face from all parties around...um no, not gone be able to do .... Get grown and then you can decide what you wanna do, but as the momma Im making the decisions and you aint gonna make feel guilty because your daddy cheated and you wanna know the other child.......you need to be mad at him for upsetting the household and quality of life as he is the one that put you all in the situation to begin with.

:werd: to the both of you. The only unfair thing is the humilliation that the cheating husband put his wife through. Anyways, in a situation like that, I would not be referring to that child as my children's brother or Sister....

 

[Bunny77]

If my kids decided that they wanted to meet their half-brother/sister once they were 18, I'd have no problem with that at all.

But I'm not going to facilitate any meetings between my child and any outside children just so they'll "know their siblings." Not at all.. not happening and they don't need to have any relationships with that sibling/siblings while they are minors.

Also, their father can tell them that they have a sibling outside of the ones they know and he can explain WHY that sibling exists. HE can be the one responsible for forming "relationships" since he was the one who created this mess to begin with.

I'm not having a thing to do with it.

 

[Bint Yusef]

Hey thats a good one for the mother of the lovechild to ponder. She happens to be responsible for HER childs wellbeing and healthy development on all levels. Time to be that childs everythang and put her own life on hold. You can't go forcing your bs on somebody that doesn't want to be bothered and that you help slight. Most women simply won't do this no matter how loving and nurturing.

Again I would be accepting of the child for a ssi check.

Okay. Thank you! That child's mother is the one that needs to be concerned. I swear we women have to put up with everything....we get to get cheated on, our house and home and family disrupted, his money going out to another house, AND on top of that you gotta play nice for a situation where he couldnt control his balls...........like I said..those kids who want to know their brother and sister can make that choice when they get grown and the burden can ALL be on them.

:werd: to the both of you. The only unfair thing is the humilliating that the cheating husband put his wife through. Anyways, in a situation like that, I would not be referring to that child as my children's brother or Sister....

If my kids decided that they wanted to meet their half-brother/sister once they were 18, I'd have no problem with that at all.

But I'm not going to facilitate any meetings between my child and any outside children just so they'll "know their siblings." Not at all.. not happening and they don't need to have any relationships with that sibling/siblings while they are minors.

Also, their father can tell them that they have a sibling outside of the ones they know and he can explain WHY that sibling exists. HE can be the one responsible for forming "relationships" since he was the one who created this mess to begin with.

I'm not having a thing to do with it.

Okay seriously.

I wish a child would call themselves being mad at me because their daddy created a messy situation and I didnt go a long with it. Be mad and go with your cheating ole daddy then.

 

[Nefertiti0906]

Okay. Thank you! That child's mother is the one that needs to be concerned. I swear we women have to put up with everything....we get to get cheated on, our house and home and family disrupted, his money going out to another house, AND on top of that you gotta play nice for a situation where he couldnt control his balls...........like I said..those kids who want to know their brother and sister can make that choice when they get grown and the burden can ALL be on them.



Okay seriously.

I wish a child would call themselves being mad at me because their daddy created a messy situation and I didnt go a long with it. Be mad and go with your cheating ole daddy then.

I didn't say anything about putting up with his sh*t

Shoot, I would be out the door (with my kids) collecting child support once I find out the joker is cheating. But still the kids should know what is going on, that their father is a mess and created a child on the side.

But I will let my children know that their brother/sister did not ask to be a part of this mess and should be treated like a human being, afterall that is their blood too.

And some people wonder what's wrong with humanity today. Most of us are very selfish people only worrying about how things affect us that we forget that our actions can also negatively affect others.

There's no point in keeping the negativity going on, we can be our brother's keeper and there's nothing wrong with that

 

[Bint Yusef]

I didn't say anything about putting up with his sh*t

Shoot, I would be out the door (with my kids) collecting child support once I find out the joker is cheating. But still the kids should know what is going on, that their father is a mess and created a child on the side.

But I will let my children know that their brother/sister did not ask to be a part of this mess and should be treated like a human being, afterall that is their blood too.

And some people wonder what's wrong with humanity today. Most of us are very selfish people only worrying about how things affect us that we forget that our actions can also negatively affect others.

There's no point in keeping the negativity going on, we can be our brother's keeper and there's nothing wrong with that

Everyone is a product of their particular set of circumstances, and I have no problem in how it would play out and feel no need to be in a situation that I had no hand in creating. Like I said once a child is of age they can make that decision for themselves, and I dont think a grown child should be poo pooing their mother after the fact about it either.

 

[infojunkie]

I think it would be extremely difficult. I would say no. If I stayed with my husband after an affair, the only way our relationship would heal is for him to cut off all contact with the woman he cheated with. If he is sharing custody with her, then the two of them will always have to have contact.

Now, if the woman was dead, or a deadbeat who got legally stripped of her custody, or abdicated her legal custody, then maybe I would consider it.

I must add, that I would not respect a man who would not raise his child, affair or not.

Ditto. There was no option for this in the poll but this is the way I feel.

 

[Nefertiti0906]

Everyone is a product of their particular set of circumstances, and I have no problem in how it would play out and feel no need to be in a situation that I had no hand in creating. Like I said once a child is of age they can make that decision for themselves.

I can see where we differ in beliefs.

I would feel more inclined to be involved in a situation if I know my actions can impact the lives of my loved ones (meaning my children, immediate siblings, and parents). I would not do the same for anyone else.

Let's agree to disagree

 

[Bint Yusef]

I can see where we differ in beliefs.

I would feel more inclined to be involved in a situation if I know my actions can impact the lives of my loved ones (meaning my children, immediate siblings, and parents). I would not do the same for anyone else.

Let's agree to disagree

Oh Im not trying to convince you, this is definitely a personal choice and I can see why someone would not take the same course of action I would take. I just dont think anyone should be made to feel bad about it as it is a very complex and delicate situation.

 

[Nefertiti0906]

Oh Im not trying to convince you, this is definitely a personal choice and I can see why someone would not take the same course of action I would take. I just dont think anyone should be made to feel bad about it as it is a very complex and delicate situation.

Good point. I didn't consider that...

OK, I'll stop replying! lol

 

[MissScarlett]

I didn't say anything about putting up with his sh*t

Shoot, I would be out the door (with my kids) collecting child support once I find out the joker is cheating. But still the kids should know what is going on, that their father is a mess and created a child on the side.

But I will let my children know that their brother/sister did not ask to be a part of this mess and should be treated like a human being, afterall that is their blood too.

And some people wonder what's wrong with humanity today. Most of us are very selfish people only worrying about how things affect us that we forget that our actions can also negatively affect others.

There's no point in keeping the negativity going on, we can be our brother's keeper and there's nothing wrong with that

Hey Soror

I'm going to disagree with you. You make a valid point but....Its too "we are the world" for me, sorry

As I said in the Jesse Jackson thread regarding this same issue, IF I kept my husband after he cheated on me and that affair had produced a child, I would not be comfortable with him having contact with the child and/or the mother and certainly my children would not have a relationship with the child.

Listen, I've already been humiliated, he cheated, I'm already sacrificing, what more must a woman sacrifice? This is not what's wrong with humanity today, its what's wrong with women today. We're always forced to do the 'right' thing, it's up to us to uphold this wrong, blah...I'm so tired of it. We have to bear the burden of so many things and now this? My thought is, if dh did this and he chose to be with me, his family, then he chose NOT to be with the other child and that woman. And by saying that I would not allow my children or dh to foster a relationship with the child outside of a financial one, the mom and everyone else would say I"M the one being selfish all of a sudden. This is where I lay blame with the OW, if you were woman enough to sleep with a married man and get pregnant (most likely on purpose) then be woman enough to have the baby and raise it alone. I'm sorry, women like JJ's concubine annoy me....they knew he was married, so they created this situation, he's wrong too but she's wrong for bringing a child into it? Is that right? Well NONE of it was "right" but do'nt make me pay for it.

Why does the cheating man get to do wrong, have his family and his outside child, it looks to me like once again, the man wins. This is such a mysogynistic society, we don't even see the problem with this. Men just dish this ish out, make us accept it and then if you don't, you're not being supportive/loving/insert BS here. But let me go and get pregnant by a guy while I"m married to dh, and then make him sit back and accept it and say "baby, its all about the children, not you, not us, its what's best for the children" Not only would I lose my entire life, I'd be the woman that "had a baby on her dh". Shoot, these men go to church, their careers continue, still hold upstanding positions in society, because its acceptable for a man to do these things. Well, not on my watch its not. This thinking alone that men need to be forgiven for every little thing, is probably why we have the problem with OOW children, black families, etc today, everyone is givng these men a pass.

If everyone was worried about the children, I feel like hey, then you should have thought about that before you cheated.

I know people IRL that have this same issue going on. I don't advise them either way about what to do, but it takes alot more than humility to accept the cheating man back and then his child. Its not something I would do. Life is about choices, everyone made one in this situation and my and my children are not going to pay for it. To me, the children STILL don't win. The OOW child still doesn't get a daddy or sibilings, he/she will always be the outside child, ya know? They would never have the same family dynamic, nothing. So really its not about the children because the children still suffer, no need to make me suffer right along with them. I don't think its being selfish, I think its setting a standard-a standard that man already broke and got a pass for.

You already got a "fkck for free pass" when I let your cheating a** back in the house, then I'm susposed to make nice with the product of you cheating on me. Nah....Like I said, not on my watch

 

[lexi08]

Hey Soror

I'm going to disagree with you. You make a valid point but....Its too "we are the world" for me, sorry

As I said in the Jesse Jackson thread regarding this same issue, IF I kept my husband after he cheated on me and that affair had produced a child, I would not be comfortable with him having contact with the child and/or the mother and certainly my children would not have a relationship with the child.

Listen, I've already been humiliated, he cheated, I'm already sacrificing, what more must a woman sacrifice? This is not what's wrong with humanity today, its what's wrong with women today. We're always forced to do the 'right' thing, it's up to us to uphold this wrong, blah...I'm so tired of it. We have to bear the burden of so many things and now this? My thought is, if dh did this and he chose to be with me, his family, then he chose NOT to be with the other child and that woman. And by saying that I would not allow my children or dh to foster a relationship with the child outside of a financial one, the mom and everyone else would say I"M the one being selfish all of a sudden. This is where I lay blame with the OW, if you were woman enough to sleep with a married man and get pregnant (most likely on purpose) then be woman enough to have the baby and raise it alone. I'm sorry, women like JJ's concubine annoy me....they knew he was married, so they created this situation, he's wrong too but she's wrong for bringing a child into it? Is that right? Well NONE of it was "right" but do'nt make me pay for it.

Why does the cheating man get to do wrong, have his family and his outside child, it looks to me like once again, the man wins. This is such a mysogynistic society, we don't even see the problem with this. Men just dish this ish out, make us accept it and then if you don't, you're not being supportive/loving/insert BS here. But let me go and get pregnant by a guy while I"m married to dh, and then make him sit back and accept it and say "baby, its all about the children, not you, not us, its what's best for the children" Not only would I lose my entire life, I'd be the woman that "had a baby on her dh". Shoot, these men go to church, their careers continue, still hold upstanding positions in society, because its acceptable for a man to do these things. Well, not on my watch its not. This thinking alone that men need to be forgiven for every little thing, is probably why we have the problem with OOW children, black families, etc today, everyone is givng these men a pass.

If everyone was worried about the children, I feel like hey, then you should have thought about that before you cheated.

I know people IRL that have this same issue going on. I don't advise them either way about what to do, but it takes alot more than humility to accept the cheating man back and then his child. Its not something I would do. Life is about choices, everyone made one in this situation and my and my children are not going to pay for it. To me, the children STILL don't win. The OOW child still doesn't get a daddy or sibilings, he/she will always be the outside child, ya know? They would never have the same family dynamic, nothing. So really its not about the children because the children still suffer, no need to make me suffer right along with them. I don't think its being selfish, I think its setting a standard-a standard that man already broke and got a pass for.

You already got a "fkck for free pass" when I let your cheating a** back in the house, then I'm susposed to make nice with the product of you cheating on me. Nah....Like I said, not on my watch

You know I have to agree with your post MS. This issue hits close to home with me. I basically took the stand you posted about. The only difference is I did not give my husband a pass, in the end I divorced him. There was no way in hell I was going to deal with the child his cheating arse made with that lil skank or deal with him having contact with her because of the child. My son had nothing to do with the child he created with that woman, no way I was allowing that. I refused to subject myself and my son to the drama that chic was bringing My son is an adult now and if he chooses to try and find his half sibling (the mom and children eventually moved away when my son was little) that is his choice, I would not stand in his way.

 

[MissScarlett]

You know I have to agree with your post MS. This issue hits close to home with me. I basically took the stand you posted about. The only difference is I did not give my husband a pass, in the end I divorced him. There was no way in hell I was going to deal with the child his cheating arse made with that lil skank or deal with him having contact with her because of the child. My son had nothing to do with the child he created with that woman, no way I was allowing that. I refused to subject myself and my son to the drama that chic was bringing My son is an adult now and if he chooses to try and find his half sibling (the mom and children eventually moved away when my son was little) that is his choice, I would not stand in his way.

Right. If this happened to me and my children as ADULTS, wanted to have a relationship with the other child, then I would support that, but as juveniles, its my duty to protect them from situations that I deem to be detrimental and harmful to them-THIS would be a situation IMO that would be detrimental to their emotional stabilty and security.

My boys aren't social experiments, if people want to wave this upstandingly moral hand and do the 'right' thing by their kids, I support that, but I wouldn't sacrifice my boys for another child just because its the moral or human thing to do. I would not support or condone a relationshp of any kind with an outside child.

 

[Eisani]

For me, it would depend on the circumstances. I say this because a good friend of mine is the product of an affair between her married father and her mother. Her mother died when she was 15 and her father, because he didn't want to tell his wife, was going to let her go into foster care. She bounced from home to home, including the home of his OTHER girlfriend before he finally had the balls to tell his wife. The wife, although upset, agreed to let her stay with them and they now have a good relationship. I'm sure it still bothers her though to know what he was doing. I used to be of the opinion that under no circumstances would I deal w/my hubby (when I get one) having a child on the side, but if the mother dies, I would allow the child in my home. I would want someone to do the same for mine.

 

[trinidarkie1]

It's one thing to stick it out with a man after an indiscretion, it's another to have to do so and take care of the product of said indiscretion.

My mother was a champion. After my brother, their first, my father had two children with two different women, and then me. My mother stuck it out.
My brother and I have always known our sibilings and we are soo close now, it's really sweet, but I know how hard it was for my mom. She did not actively raise them, but there were times when she'd give my dad the money to give to them if he didn't have it and when my bro (his son) would come by, she'd make sure and give him clothes and food and stuff.

At the end of it, my dad still left her high and dry after all of her sacrifice.

Here in lies my first hang up. I'm not sticking it out with you for you to leave me. That's a serious trust issue.

A few months after my wedding, I found out that my husband had a baby with a woman, as in the child was a toddler. Fast forward to now, the mom was found unfit and the courts are making him do the do to take care of his son.

As a Christian, regardless of how I feel, I think I have a responsibility to impart love and show the child love, but that doesn't mean that I am happy about it AT ALL.
However, I'm a doer, so I remodelled the bedroom and bought new furniture and make sure to remind him to go to his visits.
To be quite honest, I may not stay with him, however, that child will never know anything but love from me. It's hard to explain how I compartmentalize my feelings and actions, but that's how I cope.

I have never looked at my husband the same and will never trust him. Although the indiscretion was while we were not together, he still did not tell me anything and waited for me to find out.

I love the Lord and I would like to always please HIm in all that I do, but this one is a doozy. My aunt and kinda one of my Prayer Warriors was saying that maybe through my interaction with the child that he'd come to know the Love of the Lord. It's a hard pill to swallow, but if that's what God wants me to do, I have to put my natural feelings aside and just kinda deal.