Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you and got someone else pregnant?
- Thread starter GreenBloodyShoe
- Start date
FemmeCreole
Island Gyal
Re: Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you and got someone else pregna
I agree with the other ladies who say they would leave. But what you're saying is very very real. We always say what we would do.....until the shoe is on our foot.... then what? So many women stay for one reason or another.
True story... When my grandparents got together, My grandma had 3 kids. 1 was a product of a rape and the other 2 were from a previous relationship. During their relationship my grandfather stepped out and had 4 kids with 4 different women. Each time she was pregnant at the same time. That man had 8 kids in 4 years. 2 children a year for 4 consecutive years. She stayed with him and even took them into her home for years at a time. She went through hell with one of the mamas who used to try to come to the house to start trouble. That ended when my grandma had enough and she busted the woman's face and snatched a whole section of hair out her scalp.
Through all that my grandmother stayed with him and they got married and until she passed 5 years ago. Once he got in the church and turned his life around, they ended up having a beautiful relationship. The first 5 years were tumultuous to say the least.
Some years ago I asked her why she stay through all that heartache? She said she tried to leave after the 1st outside baby. She even packed her stuff and went to her mom's house. At that time she had 5 kids (2 by him). Her mom told her "you need to go back, you have 5 kids, what man you think going to take you with all dem kids. Go back to your house and tie him up." So she went back. She was a stay at home mom, she had no job and he didn't want her to get a job either. I told her I doubt I would be able to take all the shyt she went through. All she said is that it was a different time. Has it been present time she would not have stayed.
I agree with the other ladies who say they would leave. But what you're saying is very very real. We always say what we would do.....until the shoe is on our foot.... then what? So many women stay for one reason or another.
True story... When my grandparents got together, My grandma had 3 kids. 1 was a product of a rape and the other 2 were from a previous relationship. During their relationship my grandfather stepped out and had 4 kids with 4 different women. Each time she was pregnant at the same time. That man had 8 kids in 4 years. 2 children a year for 4 consecutive years. She stayed with him and even took them into her home for years at a time. She went through hell with one of the mamas who used to try to come to the house to start trouble. That ended when my grandma had enough and she busted the woman's face and snatched a whole section of hair out her scalp.
Through all that my grandmother stayed with him and they got married and until she passed 5 years ago. Once he got in the church and turned his life around, they ended up having a beautiful relationship. The first 5 years were tumultuous to say the least.
Some years ago I asked her why she stay through all that heartache? She said she tried to leave after the 1st outside baby. She even packed her stuff and went to her mom's house. At that time she had 5 kids (2 by him). Her mom told her "you need to go back, you have 5 kids, what man you think going to take you with all dem kids. Go back to your house and tie him up." So she went back. She was a stay at home mom, she had no job and he didn't want her to get a job either. I told her I doubt I would be able to take all the shyt she went through. All she said is that it was a different time. Has it been present time she would not have stayed.
If I stayed and that's a great big IF, I'd be such a miserable person to him that he'd probably wind up leaving me due to the unpleasantness of the situation. I realize its easy to say, "yes, I'd leave", but for me it's a self respect thing. I view cheating as the ultimate betrayal. I wouldn't want to live with that pain for years and years. I wouldn't want to send a message to my daughter that staying is the only option. This is a personal decision. I won't judge a wife for staying, but I saw first hand what cheating and having a baby in marriage did to my parents. I always said I wouldn't want to go through that. Maybe my views are different because my mom packed up herself and her three girls and left.
Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
HanaKuroi
Well-Known Member
I would never be able to let it go and move forward in that marriage. I would be done. It isn't right at all. It is bad for everyone. It isn't fair to any of the children.
Too messy.
Too many feelings.
Too much everything.
I would be happier alone.
I deserve better and I would have better too.
There isn't that much love in my heart for any man that would do that to me. I love myself too much to go through that.
I can't see any mentions on my IPhone. PM me if it is a must see. Allons y
Too messy.
Too many feelings.
Too much everything.
I would be happier alone.
I deserve better and I would have better too.
There isn't that much love in my heart for any man that would do that to me. I love myself too much to go through that.
I can't see any mentions on my IPhone. PM me if it is a must see. Allons y
CarefreeinChicago
Well-Known Member
Re: Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you and got someone else pregna
I would rather spend my money on vacations, or shoes and purses not other people's kids. Just being honest.
I would rather spend my money on vacations, or shoes and purses not other people's kids. Just being honest.
okange76
Well-Known Member
Re: Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you and got someone else pregna
This is abit OT but the saddest thing I ever saw was at a funeral when the wife was about to read the obituary and his outside kids and their mum showed up to attend the funeral. Everyone knew but her and grandma was cool coz they're all her grandbabies. 20+ years of being in the dark.
Where do you start? Did you really know this person? She sucked it up and continued. I would have walked away and never looked back. These kids were the same age as hers and just as educated and well looked after. Her money/household income took care of a whole new family and she never found out till he was gone.
This is abit OT but the saddest thing I ever saw was at a funeral when the wife was about to read the obituary and his outside kids and their mum showed up to attend the funeral. Everyone knew but her and grandma was cool coz they're all her grandbabies. 20+ years of being in the dark.
Where do you start? Did you really know this person? She sucked it up and continued. I would have walked away and never looked back. These kids were the same age as hers and just as educated and well looked after. Her money/household income took care of a whole new family and she never found out till he was gone.
DarkJoy
Bent. Not Broken.
Re: Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you and got someone else pregna
So... no. *** no. TFOOHWTBS. he could kiss my shiny black behind. I'd take my money, my kids, and roll the hell out.
Not just the kid but the mama! You'd have to meet and deal with her too--FOREVER if she stays in the kid's life.
So... no. *** no. TFOOHWTBS. he could kiss my shiny black behind. I'd take my money, my kids, and roll the hell out.
Alta Angel
Well-Known Member
Re: Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you and got someone else pregna
I know she wished he would come back to life so she could kill him herself!
I know she wished he would come back to life so she could kill him herself!
chronicity
Well-Known Member
Re: Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you and got someone else pregna
If she stayed with him, she'd be paying child support. Either directly or indirectly. If the support is coming out of his pay check, that means less money for their household. That means more of a drain on her paycheck.
I can't imagine settling for this either. Dude would have to majorly worth it.
If she stayed with him, she'd be paying child support. Either directly or indirectly. If the support is coming out of his pay check, that means less money for their household. That means more of a drain on her paycheck.
I can't imagine settling for this either. Dude would have to majorly worth it.
Brwnbeauti
Well-Known Member
I'm not mature enough to stay.
naturalmanenyc
Well-Known Member
Re: Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you and got someone else pregna
I've posted about it before but a friend of mine from high school stayed with her abusive, cheating man. She was pregnant at the same time as his girlfriend who lived across the street from them. They delivered his kids around the same time. Years later she is still with him, married, and they had at least one more child after that. I think 4/5 kids in total although her oldest was not his.
He is in church and seems legit from what I can tell. They seem happy from what I'm told.
One of my aunts stayed too. He had two outside kids with the same woman during their 40 or so year marriage. He always denied it though. He died not too long ago and finally confessed. His adult outside kids came to the funeral and she added their names to the program.
Leesh
FemmeCreole
Clairemitts
I've posted about it before but a friend of mine from high school stayed with her abusive, cheating man. She was pregnant at the same time as his girlfriend who lived across the street from them. They delivered his kids around the same time. Years later she is still with him, married, and they had at least one more child after that. I think 4/5 kids in total although her oldest was not his.
He is in church and seems legit from what I can tell. They seem happy from what I'm told.
One of my aunts stayed too. He had two outside kids with the same woman during their 40 or so year marriage. He always denied it though. He died not too long ago and finally confessed. His adult outside kids came to the funeral and she added their names to the program.
Leesh
FemmeCreole
Clairemitts
Last edited:
Kindheart
Well-Known Member
Re: Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you and got someone else pregna
have not read the entire thread but it's a big resounding No for me .
I couldn't deal with any form of betrayal .Getting someone else pregant not only indicates a complete disregards for our relationship but also my health .Having unprotected sex while you re with someone else it's the ultimate form of betrayal,the level of intimacy in having raw sex is higher.If i want to gamble with my health i d rather make a conscious decision about it .
have not read the entire thread but it's a big resounding No for me .
I couldn't deal with any form of betrayal .Getting someone else pregant not only indicates a complete disregards for our relationship but also my health .Having unprotected sex while you re with someone else it's the ultimate form of betrayal,the level of intimacy in having raw sex is higher.If i want to gamble with my health i d rather make a conscious decision about it .
pre_medicalrulz
It Always Been About Hair!
No. 10char
Ivonnovi
Well-Known Member
Re: Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you and got someone else pregna
If I were to stay, "He" would leave me out of f'n fear or:
Sleep w/1 eye open,
.......do a security check of his vehicle ev-er-y time he got in it. [I'm talking about ensuring that all the lug nuts are tight too]
......buy and eat his food on the way home.
......don't leave a drink (or medicine) unattended
......I'd use his toof-brush for all types of crap [pun intended]
......AND I'd stand proudly at the gates of hell to explain why I did all the above and worse
If I were to stay, "He" would leave me out of f'n fear or:
Sleep w/1 eye open,
.......do a security check of his vehicle ev-er-y time he got in it. [I'm talking about ensuring that all the lug nuts are tight too]
......buy and eat his food on the way home.
......don't leave a drink (or medicine) unattended
......I'd use his toof-brush for all types of crap [pun intended]
......AND I'd stand proudly at the gates of hell to explain why I did all the above and worse
TwoSnapsUp
Well-Known Member
Re: Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you and got someone else pregna
I don't think it has to do with maturity. It has to do with a woman having the mind to know she DESERVES BETTER.
I know it's easy to say what we would or wouldn't do...
BUT once you contract HIV, that's it. Once you contract Herpes, that is it.
I have had too many heart breaks for me to CONTINUE accepting bull ish into my life???? Heck no, I am out, I don't care if I have kids. I always felt that "I have kids with him" was an excuse for a women who was too weak to leave a man. You're not staying for the kids, you're staying because you can't leave him.
And who gives a phuck about the next man not wanting you because you have kids (which is bull ish, but whatever). That's reason enough to stay with a man who will have kids outside of your MARRIAGE????
I can't even think about having sex with you again, let alone stay with you. And you don't have to be in a relationship with a man for him to take care of his kids.
Maybe if women would stop accepting the bull, men who work harder and there wouldn't be threads and posts about wack arse men such as the "I knew your standards were low...".
I don't think it has to do with maturity. It has to do with a woman having the mind to know she DESERVES BETTER.
I know it's easy to say what we would or wouldn't do...
BUT once you contract HIV, that's it. Once you contract Herpes, that is it.
I have had too many heart breaks for me to CONTINUE accepting bull ish into my life???? Heck no, I am out, I don't care if I have kids. I always felt that "I have kids with him" was an excuse for a women who was too weak to leave a man. You're not staying for the kids, you're staying because you can't leave him.
And who gives a phuck about the next man not wanting you because you have kids (which is bull ish, but whatever). That's reason enough to stay with a man who will have kids outside of your MARRIAGE????
I can't even think about having sex with you again, let alone stay with you. And you don't have to be in a relationship with a man for him to take care of his kids.
Maybe if women would stop accepting the bull, men who work harder and there wouldn't be threads and posts about wack arse men such as the "I knew your standards were low...".
Last edited:
closertomydreams
New Member
Nope! He can forget that mess. The only benefit to this situation would be the proof of adultery for the divorce......and if I were him I would move far away and call me with news like this....face to face would be detrimental to his health.
locabouthair
Well-Known Member
Re: Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you and got someone else pregna
I know someone who stayed in that situation. Couldn't be me...
I know someone who stayed in that situation. Couldn't be me...
okange76
Well-Known Member
Re: Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you and got someone else pregna
One thing I have noticed is that, the outside kid tends to look more like the husband than his own wife's kids. The same thing happens with women too. Her outside kid will look exactly like her lover than her so her husband will be able to tell right away that the kid is not his. I wonder if it is nature's way of outing bad behavior.
One guy's outside kid had all his features including the gap between his teeth yet his sons with his wife did not have the gap. They had most of their mother's features. He couldn't even attempt to lie his way out.
One thing I have noticed is that, the outside kid tends to look more like the husband than his own wife's kids. The same thing happens with women too. Her outside kid will look exactly like her lover than her so her husband will be able to tell right away that the kid is not his. I wonder if it is nature's way of outing bad behavior.
One guy's outside kid had all his features including the gap between his teeth yet his sons with his wife did not have the gap. They had most of their mother's features. He couldn't even attempt to lie his way out.
Re: Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you and got someone else pregna
I would never do that. Knife him blood claat....
I know someone who recently received a call from the side piece telling her that she had a child for her husband and she wanted the child to meet the half sibling (the child within the marriage). So now the child comes over to visit.
Their life, their choice. That kind of disrespect would end my marriage. I have too much respect and value for myself.
Not to mention all the body juices mingling together
if you are going to cheat at least protect yourself and your partner.
I would never do that. Knife him blood claat....
I know someone who recently received a call from the side piece telling her that she had a child for her husband and she wanted the child to meet the half sibling (the child within the marriage). So now the child comes over to visit.
Their life, their choice. That kind of disrespect would end my marriage. I have too much respect and value for myself.
Not to mention all the body juices mingling together
if you are going to cheat at least protect yourself and your partner.
sunnieb
Well-Known Member
Re: Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you and got someone else pregna
And let me add this......
Yes, I know people say things and then act totally different when stuff hits the fan IRL. However, I'm old. I know exactly how I would react - and it would not be pretty. Suffice it to say, we don't have a pre-nup, and we were both broke when we got together. I would get the best lawyer in town and take it ALL. What?
Ms. Thang wouldn't get a dime because my soon-to-be ex husband would need the pennies I leave behind to live on. No come-uppance here hunty! Bwahahahahahah!
But, I readily admit that if this situation happened and I was only 22 or so, I *might* have entertained this nonsense for a hot minute in the name of "lurve". Also, back then I wasn't strong enough emotionally to resist a grown man begging me to take him back and doing everything to get me. Real talk.
And let me add this......
Yes, I know people say things and then act totally different when stuff hits the fan IRL. However, I'm old. I know exactly how I would react - and it would not be pretty. Suffice it to say, we don't have a pre-nup, and we were both broke when we got together. I would get the best lawyer in town and take it ALL. What?
Ms. Thang wouldn't get a dime because my soon-to-be ex husband would need the pennies I leave behind to live on. No come-uppance here hunty! Bwahahahahahah!But, I readily admit that if this situation happened and I was only 22 or so, I *might* have entertained this nonsense for a hot minute in the name of "lurve". Also, back then I wasn't strong enough emotionally to resist a grown man begging me to take him back and doing everything to get me. Real talk.
Whimsy
Well-Known Member
Re: Would you stay with your husband if he cheated on you and got someone else pregna
Someone I know is in a similar situation right now. She's staying with him, but the mistress terminated the pregnancy, thank goodness.
I know it's hard to say what you'd do if you're not in the situation, but I just cannot see myself staying with my husband if he cheated on me. There just is no way for me to get past that.
Someone I know is in a similar situation right now. She's staying with him, but the mistress terminated the pregnancy, thank goodness.
I know it's hard to say what you'd do if you're not in the situation, but I just cannot see myself staying with my husband if he cheated on me. There just is no way for me to get past that.
ChoiceTheory
Well-Known Member
Polygamy is the answer... Sister Wives!
Similar threads
