Men-free Zone ~ The Non-romantic Relationship Thread

[LdyKamz]

Brunch was so much fun! Funny story. We went to a place that has a similar name to another place I frequent so I thought we were going there. I spoke to my father the night before just chatting telling him what my plans for the weekend were and told him where we were going. He did say "oh you know they have a place that just opened up by me with a similar name" but I didn't pay that any mind. So yesterday as I was leaving my house I decided to google the place one more time and saw the address was actually in my dad's neighborhood. So I text him to tell him he was right and that's actually the place I'm going. We laughed about it.

I get off the train and I'm on the phone with my sister telling her dad's area has changed and she says do you see any black people. And I was like one so far and then another man turns the corner and I say "oh here go another one". I have terrible eyesight without my glasses but I see the man waves at me and I wave back. When I get closer I go "oh snap sis it's dad!" He comes over and was like I wanted to catch you before you meet your friend and just say hi. Talking about I look cute and snapping pics like it was graduation day. That man is silly. Haha It was a nice surprise.

 

[hopeful]

@KammyGirl your dad sounds awesome. Lucky you .

 

[LdyKamz]

@KammyGirl your dad sounds awesome. Lucky you .

He's pretty great...most of the time. lol

 

[NaturalEnigma]

I joined a coed bowling league. The team meets every Wednesday. I thought I was pretty good at bowling but compared to my teammates I suck lol. But they are nice though and friendly and offer me tips so it's all good.

 

[caribeandiva]

My coworker lost her husband unexpectedly after a short illness 2 days ago. She also lost her teenage daughter last year when she was hit by a car. I don't know what to do. I love on her as much as I can, I listen to her but I feel helpless.

 

[LostInAdream]

My coworker lost her husband unexpectedly after a short illness 2 days ago. She also lost her teenage daughter last year when she was hit by a car. I don't know what to do. I love on her as much as I can, I listen to her but I feel helpless.

You are such a wonderful person! Just keep loving on her that's exactly what she needs. Hugs to you both!

 

[LdyKamz]

I'm having lunch with a friend of mine today. He gave me a hard time saying he hasn't seen me since last summer. Not true, btw he's just a drama queen. I'm excited to see him. This guy keeps me in stitches he is so hilarious.

I feel like I've been more social lately and I am definitely not usually. I am a homebody, introverted, shy and typically very quiet. It's difficult for me to make friends so the few that I have are important to me. Even though I don't like to hang out much I do my best to nurture these relationships because I want to keep them. I can't understand other people who don't do the same.

 

[TwoSnapsUp]

This has been a nonproductive week. I think I'll take myself out to breakfast.

 

[weaveadiva]

My father is planning to visit later this year

I don't even bother asking folks anymore.

This. I make the plans for myself and then see if anyone wants to tag along.

 

[TwoSnapsUp]

This is the second notificatiin I got from FB that people are looking at my profile. Next, they'll be telling me exactly who.

 

[silverbuttons]

Tomorrow im off to the NE to hang out with my friends. I hope we get schwastedddd and spill our crazy experiences. I miss them.

I met with a few amazing ladies last Sunday. Black women are truly amazing.. i love their spirits and humor. Crazy trend: most of the women i have great energy with either had locs or is loc'ed. I feel like the universe is trying to peer pressure me!

 

[LdyKamz]

My sister is so extra sometimes and it is annoying AF. On Wednesday I went to dinner with my sis and my mom. It was actually really great. My sis and my mom's relationship can be strained at times so it was wonderful that we all had such a great time. The problem with that is my sister gets on a high and then wants to bombard everyone with attention and love every second of everyday after that. It's cute but it's like chill. LOL

So she was all on her high after a great dinner and she's texting us all day long in group message yesterday. Then she wanted to come over to my house. I literally speak to this woman 100 times a day every day and I see her quite often since she only lives a few blocks away. In this case I had seen her the day before and got home really late from dinner so the plan yesterday was to go home and try to get my apartment in order and maybe finish cleaning so I wouldn't be stuck doing that all weekend. I told her so. "Nah, don't come by I want to work out and then get some cleaning done. See you this weekend"

Homegirl showed up anyway and with my father no less because her lazy behind wanted a ride 3 blocks!! Imagine my face when I opened my door in my yoga pants, sports bra and dirty cleaning gloves on. I was pissed! My house was in disarray, there was nowhere to sit and there was stuff all over the floor. I had to tell her to please listen to me next time. It's not about me not wanting to see her but I had things to do.

Do you know this girls feelings were hurt and she sulked the rest of the night and tried to make me feel bad. I learned long ago not to let anyone make me feel bad for their hurt feelings when they've ignored mine. I was looking like but I told you not to come and then you just did anyway. Why should I feel bad for asking why she came when I told her not to and she doesn't feel bad that she intruded on my time. This isn't that big of a deal but her actions said loudly "oh you don't want me to come but I'm coming anyway. Forget about what you have to do and I don't care how you feel about it and yes I will be upset if you reject me coming over".

 

[MzLady78]

My cousin called me and threatened bodily harm if I didn't get dressed and come over to her place.

I was having trouble motivating myself to get out so I'm glad. I wasn't doing myself any good sitting alone in my apartment the way I'm feeling right now.

And my little cousin, her daughter, is so sweet. She told me I could sleep in her bed if it got late and I didn't feel like going home.

 

[hopeful]

@KammyGirl that would drive me nuts! Interesting how she refused to not respect your wishes or boundaries -- not cool .

 

[TwoSnapsUp]

I need to find places that I can go to and enjoy alone without it screaming "I'm a desperate woman hoping a man will approach me"

My list of single associates is quickly dwindling down so I needs ways to enjoy myself, by myself.

 

[caribeandiva]

I need to find places that I can go to and enjoy alone without it screaming "I'm a desperate woman hoping a man will approach me"

My list of single associates is quickly dwindling down so I needs ways to enjoy myself, by myself.

I understand. It depends on your mentality when you're out alone. If you focus on going out FOR YOU and only for you then people will pick up on that. I like to do what interests me and that's the only test events have to pass. I like bookstores, concerts, movies, festivals, walks in nature, picking my own fruits and veggies at local farms, events going on around town, etc...

 

[Always~Wear~Joy]

I was at a concert tonight and after the show the guy sitting next to me pretended to drop something and he asked his gf to look under the table. By the time she turned around he was down on one knee proposing to her. It was my first time seeing that happen in real life. It was so sweet. We were all cheering and giving her high-fives lol. His friend was with his wife and he recorded the whole thing. It was great to witness their joy!

 

[LdyKamz]

I was at a concert tonight and after the show the guy sitting next to me pretended to drop something and he asked his gf to look under the table. By the time she turned around he was down on one knee proposing to her. It was my first time seeing that happen in real life. It was so sweet. We were all cheering and giving her high-fives lol. His friend was with his wife and he recorded the whole thing. It was great to witness their joy!

How cute!

 

[C@ssandr@]

My bff published a book. I found out though facebook. I unfollowed her years ago due to oversharing. Anyway, I wanted to confront her because I "felt some kind of way" about her not telling me -_- But now that I've given it some time, I'm just going to fall back. I've spoken to her a few time since then. Just chatting and what not. I didn't bring itup because I really didn't want to go there...I'm ok with this though. I think the issue is that she does not value me. We've been friends/besties for 18 years now.

I am not the dramatic, resentful type so there will be no announcement of any sort . I'm just gonna stop sending emotional energy her way. I think it would definitely benefit me to just stop reaching out as much (she reaches out frequently enough, so that's not a part of the issue).

hmm, I feel a whole lot better now that I've put it all out there.

 

[BrownBetty]

I need travel buddies. There are certain cities I feel would be more fun with people e.g. New Orleans. I have friends but they are so not dependable when it comes to traveling. My girl flaked on me on two trips last year. One was literally two days before were suppose to leave. She was lucky were were driving and I still had time to cancel the rooms.

I need to expand my social circle. I have a lot of acquaintances but not enough folks that I trust.

Uggh...

 

[LdyKamz]

My bff published a book. I found out though facebook. I unfollowed her years ago due to oversharing. Anyway, I wanted to confront her because I "felt some kind of way" about her not telling me -_- But now that I've given it some time, I'm just going to fall back. I've spoken to her a few time since then. Just chatting and what not. I didn't bring itup because I really didn't want to go there...I'm ok with this though. I think the issue is that she does not value me. We've been friends/besties for 18 years now.

I am not the dramatic, resentful type so there will be no announcement of any sort . I'm just gonna stop sending emotional energy her way. I think it would definitely benefit me to just stop reaching out as much (she reaches out frequently enough, so that's not a part of the issue).

hmm, I feel a whole lot better now that I've put it all out there.

Your best friend didn't share that she wrote a book? That's exciting news. Why do you think she hasn't mentioned it especially since she's put it on Facebook and presumably knows you don't follow her anymore.

 

[LdyKamz]

Sometimes I want my alone time. Ok, a lot of times I want my alone time. But for some reason people don't respect that and won't leave me alone and then it just prolongs me wanting alone time.

Example: I wanted to spend this weekend alone just lounging around not doing anything. Cooking, cleaning, Netflix, movies, etc. Except my mother, sister, cousin, father, aunt, and 2 friends in particular called and text me non stop. My sister wanted me to go with her to my cousin's house to help her paint, my mother wanted me to fix her television (even though I fixed it on Wednesday! Lol) and on and on.

I initially responded to their messages telling them I'm chilling this weekend but then ignored them when they wouldn't leave me alone. One friend just text again to say since I spent my weekend alone do I want to hang tomorrow or Tuesday. Problem is, now I don't feel like I had a relaxing weekend because they wouldn't go away and I need another day or 2 without all the interruptions. He doesn't see it that way since I was actually alone this weekend. He doesn't get it. None of them do.

 

[MzLady78]

I really, REALLY need my mother to accept that I do not, and will never like my brother's girlfriend.

She just suggested I invite "them" over to my place for his birthday instead of taking him out. How 'bout no.

I've already told my brother at the very least, I will be civil to her. He said he understood, so my mother needs to let it go.

 

[Miss_Luna]

I'm so excited to spend the weekend reading and doing some self-care. Gym, bookstore, apartment weekend. This week, I got some great news and contacted my two best friends that really encouraged me to take a risk and that they would support me, in whatever decision I make.

I've realized that I need to stay away from social media. If I'm going to sit around on my phone, then it needs to be focused on doing something productive. I'm about to move to a country where I don't speak the language very well, so instead of Facebook, I need to sit on Duolingo or reading news in the local language.

I feel really optimistic about the future. Can't wait for this next chapter to begin.

 

[SurferBabe]

Ok y'all. I'm going to try this Bumble BFF app to find some female friends nearby. I'll report back on how it goes. Have any of you tried this and had luck?

 

[BrownBetty]

I really, REALLY need my mother to accept that I do not, and will never like my brother's girlfriend.

She just suggested I invite "them" over to my place for his birthday instead of taking him out. How 'bout no.

I've already told my brother at the very least, I will be civil to her. He said he understood, so my mother needs to let it go.

Lol... yeah if your brother has accepted it then your mom needs to let it go. I tell all my brothers I am not going to invest in a rlp with your chick until you get engaged and/or have a kid.
You are entitled to your feelings and as long as you can be civil that is all that is required of you.

 

[BrownBetty]

How would folks feel about a travel buddy thread? Basically you post where you want to go and when. If someone is interested you both make your own arrangements and meet up there.
If you hit it off great if not that is fine also because you have your own space aka room.

 

[Miss617]

I really, REALLY need my mother to accept that I do not, and will never like my brother's girlfriend.

She just suggested I invite "them" over to my place for his birthday instead of taking him out. How 'bout no.

I've already told my brother at the very least, I will be civil to her. He said he understood, so my mother needs to let it go.

She did WHAT?! Wow.

She told me not to be rude to her when she came over for Easter because they came the day before and I just said hey when I came downstairs. She tried to give me a hug when they left. Fortunately she didn't come with him when he came after you left.

 

[MzLady78]

Lol... yeah if your brother has accepted it then your mom needs to let it go. I tell all my brothers I am not going to invest in a rlp with your chick until you get engaged and/or have a kid.
You are entitled to your feelings and as long as you can be civil that is all that is required of you.

Exactly. And my feelings are completely valid, @Miss617 can co-sign.

She did WHAT?! Wow.

She told me not to be rude to her when she came over for Easter because they came the day before and I just said hey when I came downstairs. She tried to give me a hug when they left. Fortunately she didn't come with him when he came after you left.

Ain't nobody being rude to that chick.

 

[MzLady78]

How would folks feel about a travel buddy thread? Basically you post where you want to go and when. If someone is interested you both make your own arrangements and meet up there.
If you hit it off great if not that is fine also because you have your own space aka room.

I think this is a great idea.