Can You Be A Mistress?

[Honey Bee]

But this isn't about a one time slip up, that's a one night stand. A mistress is different, it's deception..plus money and intimacy are way more likely involved.

The conversation sort of drifted into cheating more generally, but, in any event, I already stated: Don't spend my money on heaux.

I warned him once that I knew herbs that would make his dack non-functional and there is no question that I'd use them. I'd feign ignorance, smile sweetly, and slowly poison his @ss. He knows not to play with me.

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

Herbs? If that doesn't scare a *****, not much else will.

 

[SophieDulce]

The conversation sort of drifted into cheating more generally, but, in any event, I already stated: Don't spend my money on heaux. I warned him once that I knew herbs that would make his dack non-functional and there is no question that I'd use them. I'd feign ignorance, smile sweetly, and slowly poison his @ss. He knows not to play with me.

Lol!!!!!! Hilarious. I can tell you what I can spot out a reformed heaux in a heart beat. It's like the female version of hotep peen. My dh thinks I'm Crazy and vindictive but he loves me anyway lol I threw his brand new iPod out the window when we were dating because he's ex girlfriend sent him message him on Facebook. Dh hates white people so I already have it planned any type of pay back will involve a rich Jewish white man from his rival company or co-worker that he has to see everyday

 

[Honey Bee]

Herbs? If that doesn't scare a *****, not much else will.

I'm trynna tell y'all.

True story: his mom had breast cancer and refused to see a doctor. I gave her a recipe of not-hard-to-acquire herbs that she took every five to six hours, even waking up in the middle of the night to take it. Her doctors credited that brew with halting the advancement of the cancer for the long months it took for us to convince her to seek treatment. She survived and is doing well.

He thinks I'm a sort of earth-bound goddess. I was not exaggerating. He doesn't 'worship' me, of course, that wouldn't be attractive, but he has immense respect for me. My head game ain't too shabby either and I can burn. Why not keep me happy?

 

[Honey Bee]

Dh hates white people so I already planned any type of pay back will involve a rich Jewish white man from his rival company or co-worker.

.........

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

I love that one. "A white man will be raising our kids."

*blank stare*

 

[Layluh]

Hmm so this is interesting. Ive been trying to think of schemes to pay back dh if he ever cheated. Yall have some good suggestions. Herbs, coworkers, jewish men. Thanks!

Does anyone else have revenge plans theyd like to share?

 

[Honey Bee]

I love that one. "A white man will be raising our kids."

*blank stare*

OMG! That's terrible!

 

[shortycocoa]

This thread is bomb.....

I think most don't care if it's another woman. But let another man penetrate, and they lose their minds.

that's not entirely true....most men i've been with get heavy in their feelings when i am intimate with another woman or express the desire to do so. They try to act like they're cool with me being bisexual, but they really aren't. I would love to hear from other bisexual posters regarding this.

Oh, and i nominate barbiesocialite for president....

#sherawanduncut

 

[SophieDulce]

This thread is bomb..... that's not entirely true....most men i've been with get heavy in their feelings when i am intimate with another woman or express the desire to do so. They try to act like they're cool with me being bisexual, but they really aren't. I would love to hear from other bisexual posters regarding this. Oh, and i nominate barbiesocialite for president.... #sherawanduncut

That's why i gotta take y'all's responses with the side eye. Yall got twice the amount of available partners as the average heterosexual person out there and will always have a lover available that a man will forgive and might even welcome. Best of both worlds

 

[SophieDulce]

Hmm so this is interesting. Ive been trying to think of schemes to pay back dh if he ever cheated. Yall have some good suggestions. Herbs, coworkers, jewish men. Thanks! Does anyone else have revenge plans theyd like to share?

Lol girl I got so many creative ones that i might need to pm you anyway I think it would be easier for me to forgive an affair if I had my revenge that involved crushing his ego to the ground first.

 

[oceanwater]

What is going on in here? medicine man and jew man. Ya'll hilarious

 

[SophieDulce]

I have Venus in scorpio lol

 

[UmSumayyah]

I love that one. "A white man will be raising our kids."

*blank stare*

That wouldn't work for me.

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

That wouldn't work for me.

Darn! Um .... things that white people hate ... hmmm ..... let me think.

 

[Dove56]

barbiesocialite I do think you have a point about being born to be second. I quess the way I was raised, especially being the oldest and my parents both thinking I can walk on water must be why I could never be 2nd. I haven't seen it from that angle but I am either #1 or there's nothing left to talk about.

 

[Dove56]

YO

but that's all the more reason you're likely to end up with a cheating man. you've already been used to coming in second. After all, you are not your mother to be able to enjoy such privileges. It's like first nature to you from birth. You're dad conditioned you to understanding you are not important and there is some woman, any woman, that can come before you.

My father chooses me. every time. over my mom. over everyone else. even when I hate him. I would never tolerate anything less. Which is probably why I didnt notice when I didnt talk to married man anymore. I also never need to save phone numbers because I will always come first to other people. I dont need to call them, they want to call me.

I agree with coming first to people. I have and will never chase people. I am always the one shooing folks away. Again, this dynamic has always been in play, so much so that I didn't really think about it until I saw this post.

 

[hopeful]

That wouldn't work for me.

I'm sure we can help you come up with something ... LHCF has an answer for everyone and every situation... We'll think of something lol.

 

[Brownie]

.

 

[Dove56]

No on multiple layers. If you give your word to someone (for better or worse), you should do so. I wouldn't fool around with a man like that either. If I were sneaking with him, that would speak volumes about my character. I believe in karma and treating people right. Someone may be feeling like queen bee today, stomping all over another woman's unity, but watch out, life can bring you to your knees in a second.

Yes to all of this. Plus, who would have time for all of the games? Seems like a huge waste of energy, time and purpose.

 

[momi]

No on multiple layers. If you give your word to someone (for better or worse), you should do so. I wouldn't fool around with a man like that either. If I were sneaking with him, that would speak volumes about my character. I believe in karma and treating people right. Someone may be feeling like queen bee today, stomping all over another woman's unity, but watch out, life can bring you to your knees in a second.

Word. It's all fun and games until your own chickens come home to roost.

 

[oceanwater]

Darn! Um .... things that white people hate ... hmmm ..... let me think.

hmmm...

 

[ladysaraii]

That wouldn't work for me.

Darn! Um .... things that white people hate ... hmmm ..... let me think.

I'm sure we can help you come up with something ... LHCF has an answer for everyone and every situation... We'll think of something lol.

Find a big, dark skinned, rastafarian mandingo home to play daddy (and Daddy ). Make sure he's on that plane of consciousness stuff. Or a militant Malcolm X mandingo.

 

[UmSumayyah]

Find a big, dark skinned, rastafarian mandingo home to play daddy (and Daddy ). Make sure he's on that plane of consciousness stuff. Or a militant Malcolm X mandingo.

If we go divorced, heaven forbid, I'm taking Zaynab 's advice and giving him sole physical custody.

I already know these kids would be hell on a stepmother.

Meanwhile I will get someone new. And we both know that I can.

 

[CoilyFields]

This whole thread...

I could never be a mistress and I look down on those who choose to be. It's not ok with me. I would not be friends with a woman who is and I would shame my family member if she was one. And yeah, I know all the pro side-chicks would say, who cares what you think? And I'm sure that may not stop them from getting their heaux on.

I believe that a woman should have enough respect for her fellow woman not to knowingly mess with her man. If a person can intentionally hurt/use someone else in a way that they would not want to be hurt/used themselves then that says a lot about their character to me. "I don't care about HER" is just so callous. If you can look a wife and child in the face and say I don't care that my actions contributed to your sorrow, anguish, and the break-up of your family then that is sad...for you.

The husband is the primary one responsible. He agreed to the covenant which included fidelity. But the mistress is also responsible, morally. Because i believe that it is each human beings job to do the least amount of harm to others as possible.

I don't believe in Karma but I do believe in reaping and sowing. For every action, good or bad, there will be consequences/rewards in this life or at judgement. But God doesn't want us to be motivated by selfish-gain or fear (the final judgement) in doing good, He wants us to love others (including strangers) for the sake of loving because we received such a great love from Him. And yeah, I said God. Because that's what I believe.

A mistress is not a position to be celebrated or justified. It's just wrong.

 

[BEAUTYU2U]

Find a big, dark skinned, rastafarian mandingo home to play daddy (and Daddy ). Make sure he's on that plane of consciousness stuff. Or a militant Malcolm X mandingo.

I was just about to type this. Find a black Muslim by the name of Yusef Muhammad who will knock your box out and make your screams cry through the burgular windows while the children run in and out of the metal-gate front door.

1. Muslims - check
2. Big, black peen - check
3. Poverty - check

 

[Honey Bee]

I don't believe in Karma but I do believe in reaping and sowing.

A mistress is not a position to be celebrated or justified. It's just wrong.

The problem I have with the moral stance is that it's not universal. You might think it is, but it isn't. For 99% of human history, marriage was about maintaining the orderly transfer of property. In those periods, mistresses and all assorted varieties of sex workers were necessary to the societal structure. For example, the Middle Ages, a time when the Church ran everything:

With the establishment of prostitution men were less likely to collectively rape honest women of marriageable and re-marriageable age. This is most clearly demonstrated in St. Augustine's claim that "the removal of the institution would bring lust into all aspects of the world."[30] Meaning that without prostitutes to subvert male tendencies, men would go after innocent women instead, thus the prostitutes were actually doing society a favor.
wiki

Do you think they accumulated bad karma? Shoot, them heaux might be useful now.

You might think, 'Well, marriage is different now, it's based on love', but for people born into wealth, the old ways still hold true. And for those who plan to acquire wealth in this generation, who study how others accomplished it, dissolving a union whose primary goal is to siphon wealth to the next generation over what? momentary weakness? would be head-shakingly frivolous. Many women would tell you, 'Let him have his whores', and really mean it.

I say all that to say, there are times and circumstances when mistresses (and assorted heaux) provide a valuable service. For some, those times and circumstances exist even today. That's just the way of the world.

 

[SophieDulce]

As for the mistress jump offwhatever I would ruin her.. You hear me... Her credit would be ruined, her pictures would be plastered all over Internet porn sites and sent those escort pages. Publish any personal things about her on Craig's list. Send all her info out to former future employers. Find someone to harass her boss, Email dirty details to her co-workers. Hack her email, Open up utilities bills in her name, hospital bills. I'd go to car dealerships and give them all her info. Send her phone to the prisoners. I do it without getting caught too. I'd hire a PI every couple of years, so that once she gets her life straightened out I'd fck with her again just for the hell of it. My Dh would get it the worst though because His family and friends would suffer. I should delete this lol.....

 

[SophieDulce]

The problem I have with the moral stance is that it's not universal. You might think it is, but it isn't. For 99% of human history, marriage was about maintaining the orderly transfer of property. In those periods, mistresses and all assorted varieties of sex workers were necessary to the societal structure. For example, the Middle Ages, a time when the Church ran everything: Do you think they accumulated bad karma? Shoot, them heaux might be useful now. You might think, 'Well, marriage is different now, it's based on love', but for people born into wealth, the old ways still hold true. And for those who plan to acquire wealth in this generation, who study how others accomplished it, dissolving a union whose primary goal is to siphon wealth to the next generation over what? momentary weakness? would be head-shakingly frivolous. Many women would tell you, 'Let him have his whores', and really mean it. I say all that to say, there are times and circumstances when mistresses provide a valuable service. For some, those times and circumstances exist even today. That's just the way of the world.

It was an acceptable part of society.

 

[Honey Bee]

It was an acceptable part of society.

But my point was, it still is an acceptable part of society for some.

There's no one-size-fits-all rule in modernity. You'll have to work it out amongst yourselves in a clear and cogent conversation. (ie, 'You know I'll ruin your life, right? Oh, ok, just wanted to be clear. ')

A lot of people (mostly women) get their feelings hurt because they think they're in one type of relationship and the husband is on some other ish. Yeah, there are liars, but if you tell a man while you're dating, 'I. Will. Stab. You.', he knows where you stand. With that information, he can decide whether or not he wants to get stabbed.