2012 Relationship Random Thoughts.... Part III

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I had a picnic with the new guy, the Inventor. It was nice. Again we broached the topic of relationships. He listed some of what he is looking for in his future lady, and he asked me to do the same. I was tickled when he said that he is looking for someone who loves sex and is great at it:blush: he said it so matter-of-factly that I was a little taken aback. But, roommate had already told me that she's overheard him say that a few times with his male buddies before, so I was more or less prepared... Just didn't expect for him to actually SAY that.
He and I haven't kissed yet... And I'm not rushing it. Personally, we have not kissed bc he hasn't made enough effort to kiss me yet, and I won't do it first... Which I suspect is what he's hoping... OR (and more likely) that he's waiting for a wide open invitation. My body language, I'm sure, hasn't been conducive to that. I haven't had a drop of alcohol when hanging out with him, which helps me avoid being super relaxed and open and flirtatious, and looking bedroomy:look: (I have low alcohol tolerance and my eyes get really droopy after just one drink... And guys have told me it sends a certain message:nono:) Also, new guy and I have only hung out in the daytime or in very public places. I dunno, overall I think it is a body language thing... I'm just not giving an open vibe.
Also, I'm still looking for a spark... Which I've yet to feel. I started feeling like I was starting to like him emotionally, but like, today, I massaged his hand (it was part of a joke), and I had no tingle whatsoever...:ohwell: Not even when he did the same to me.
So, that's worrisome. I want both types of attractions. I kinda wish he would just kiss me soon so that I know... Even though, as interested as he's becoming, it might complicate things more if there is still no spark.

He is interested in a relationship... And he stated that again. But the summer is a problem, I guess. As of now, he is scheduled to be in 3 different continents this summer... And I'm super hesitant about tying myself to someone long distance so early on, if the vibe isn't spectacular.

Anyway, he also thinks I'm snappy (I admit, I was pretty snappy today), and he says that while it's cool, he wishes we were just more relaxed with one another. It's just that I get a little annoyed that he leaves it up to me to figure out the details and openly confesses to hating having to make decisions and is willing to go with whatever detail I choose. I dunno, I find that frustrating:lol: Well, that's neither here nor there. Verdict is still out with him. I need a kiss to decide, I guess... But how much do I really want one?
 
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!! To all the mamas and aunties and god-mothers who did that thang!

My day started at 5am with FH presenting me with a gigantic gift basket (that I suspect cost way too much) on his way to work, but it was absolutely beautiful. His daughter gave me a gift set from B&BWs.

Then my Baby Girl came over and cooked my fav breakfast, blueberry pancakes, bacon and eggs...scrumptious. We waited for The Spawn to get in from school and then all went to church. Then the three of us went to see Think Like a Man...I know...it's been out.

Now I'm waiting for FH to get home so we can do whatever he planned. Today was a really great day.
 
On another note, my friend told me that I'm very picky, that I don't know how to go with the flow. It's true, I do not... Or at least, I struggle with how to do so while maintaining boundaries...
I know that, looking back, there are a few people that I wouldn't have been so quick to cut off... That I could have been more willing to see where things are headed. I often snap and shut down quickly.

I have this (perhaps negative) view that going with the flow means going with the guy's flow... But,objectively,it shouldn't mean that things have to NOT bode well for the woman if she just relaxes a little. My friend says that I self-sabotage. It's true... And it's always been true for me.
I don't always trust my judgment, so if I feel too excited about someone early on, I start fixating on reasons why the excitement is probably a farce, and once I find a minor thing that I don't like, it becomes this huge thing that I can't take my mind off of. The underlying issue is fear of getting hurt... Because I haaave more or less gone with the flow with a couple of people and ended up getting my feelings hurt pretty badly. So, having walls up is safer, but they're not helping me get what I want either:ohwell:

Anyway, thinking more about going with the flow while still maintaining boundaries... Maybe all it takes is to be vocal about said boundaries... After all. It seems that the conflicts in my dating experiences tend to happen when I'm assuming and not saying anything... Taking things and running with them instead of clarifying... Hoping that certain boundaries don't get breached without actually stating said boundaries...
I really could do more in that arena. What might that look like with the Inventor?
 
My bff is married now :cry: her wedding was so beautiful. I hope someday I can find that kind of love, friendship and comfort in someone. I'm surely willing to give it.
 
was nearly the only single person at a get-together recently...at first i was sad then i heard some dysfunctional relationships problems and was cured lol not that i thrive off couples misery it just reminded me of some of the great things about being single :)
 
After all these months my friend calls me crying and wanting to stop living. Why? because she found a gel nail in their bed. Ummm what do you expect he's a P-I-M-P literally.
 
so, im not sure if i'm being selfish or not, but at this point i'm just kinda pissed. so this guy i've been dating for the last month we had a date for friday, he had to cancel friday b/c his family came in town for his cousins graduation. which i was like, okay i understand, and he rescheduled for saturday. saturday comes, and he's like im soo sorry, but my family decided to stay the weekend and wants to do a tour of the city, and he rescheduled for sunday. okay, i understand, last minute things come up. but i asked him are you sure about sunday, b/c its mothers day? he's like yeah, i'm taking my mom out, but i'll make it up to you and we'll go out after. okay, fine... sooo... today is here, and same thing. so, i completely understand spending time with the family, but im not okay with you keep canceling on me though. so im conflicted between feeling selfish and being a bit pissed off, b/c i could've made other plans had i known... /end vent

After the second cancellation, I would have said no until the next weekend.
 
Neurotic, hm, I don't appreciate that label, but I can admit I over-analyze.

neurotic is not a negative thing - at least it's not to me. i would actually consider myself a neurotic overthinker. but CMON gurlfran... you're running yourself in circles over such small things! let em gooooooooooo
 
If my friend asked me to marry him right now I would. I've known him for 11 yrs and i've always admired him since the first day I met him.
 
meesch said:
neurotic is not a negative thing - at least it's not to me. i would actually consider myself a neurotic overthinker. but CMON gurlfran... you're running yourself in circles over such small things! let em gooooooooooo

I do:sad: and I need to stop. Siiiiigh.
 
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!! To all the mamas and aunties and god-mothers who did that thang!

Thanks for shouting us out!

In other news:

Dear humans of the opposite sex,

if you have a gf/dw then that means you're taken and shouldn't be trying to hold somebody else's hand in public *smh*
 
My guy and I were going to visit one of his friends today. I decided to stay home due to horrid cramps when he called me at 2pm. Well he went and ended up sitting still/stuck in traffic for over 2 hours on the way back. He was three hours late for work tonight.

I hope I feel better today because we planned to do lunch at San Antonio Winery. I want some Stella Rose and a good meal.
 
bf and i had a great weekend :cloud9: which is ironic because i had wanted to stay home... it was one of those weeks where i didnt like him :lol: but now im all smitten again :drunk::drunk::drunk:

by the way i think perhaps the VOs are here to stay, because they have been repeating with no problem... which i think is CRAZY. you elude me for years and then suddenly boom here i am? whats up with that? :lol:
 
HE'S BACK FROM HIS CRUISE!! :grin:Was wondering if he forgot about me these least few days since we didnt talk and it turns out all those text messages/phone calls got his phone cut off due to international costs LOL Aww but he still called me off someone's phone when he got in :kiss2:

I missed him so much...immediately skyped last night :user:...he told me I looked sexy:lick:...and he's happy I still kept the natural look one more day before I go diva mode on him lol....cant wait to see him in 2wks!!! I'll be in a weave, lashes and all:kiss3:Honeyluv will be back I know he misses her too lol!! :whipgirl:
 
I met a guy at my friend's b-day party last night. I was a little tipsy and I think I entered the wrong number in his phone. :pullhair:

I guess I'll find out for certain within the next couple days.
 
We talked. I feel incredibly light today. Niether of us communicate our feelings very well, which makes it painfully awkward at times, but it's worth it.
 
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I got together with a friend this weekend who purposely got pregnant by an EX who treats her very badly (verbal abusive and overall disrespectful). Now with a 1-month baby, she was crying the blues about being a “single mother”, he’s not behaving any different and how no one else will want her.

She had the nerve to look me in the eye and say….YOU SHOULD HAVE A BABY, TOO.

WTF :/

I think she is hoping things don't work out with my BOO....
 
I got together with a friend this weekend who purposely got pregnant by an EX who treats her very badly (verbal abusive and overall disrespectful). Now with a 1-month baby, she was crying the blues about being a “single mother”, he’s not behaving any different and how no one else will want her.

She had the nerve to look me in the eye and say….YOU SHOULD HAVE A BABY, TOO.

WTF :/

I think she is hoping things don't work out with my BOO....

misery loves company
 
We had a GREAT time on Saturday :love:

We're hanging out again tonight :D He's taking me to this jazz club. And we're going to the Cheesecake Factory on Wednesday :D

He is the Groupon/LivingSocial king! :lol:
 
finally met his parents, sister, bro in law, parents' best friends and their daughter. at dinner. they were the nicest, most open and gregarious group of people ever. On one side was his dad, BF was on the other side and across from me was his mom. I never once felt uncomfortable or ignored. They are some really nice and welcoming people. hugs and kisses all around.

Im trying to not let fear and anxiety seep in. This feels like it is moving quickly at times. I know that many people in his life knows about me. His family, college friends and def law school friends. I cannot say the same for me. Part of me is terrified bc this is my first 100% serious, no-doubt-in-his-intentions relationship. This sounds weird but I kind of got used to being disappointed after meeting someone. This is not happening right now and part of me doesn't know what to do with myself. But then I remember, we are parting ways for the summer, so I should just be in the moment and enjoy it all. I am. I'm trying to. But these thoughts seep in when I'm alone.
 
*If I'm dreaming, then don't wake me*

Our text this morning:

Him: What would you like for dinner?

Me: What are our choices for dinner?

Him: Anything your heart desires my LOVE!!!

Me: I don't know. What's in your freezer?

Him: It doesn't matter. I will buy whatever you want me to cook.

I love him.
 
*If I'm dreaming, then don't wake me*

Our text this morning:

Him: What would you like for dinner?

Me: What are our choices for dinner?

Him: Anything your heart desires my LOVE!!!

Me: I don't know. What's in your freezer?

Him: It doesn't matter. I will buy whatever you want me to cook.

I love him.

Skrimps:lick:

:lol:
 
*If I'm dreaming, then don't wake me*

Our text this morning:

Him: What would you like for dinner?

Me: What are our choices for dinner?

Him: Anything your heart desires my LOVE!!!

Me: I don't know. What's in your freezer?

Him: It doesn't matter. I will buy whatever you want me to cook.

I love him.

when bf does this it pisses me off :look: FOOL I DONT CARE, COOK ME SOMETHING AND MAKE IT TASTY :lol:
 
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