What Can We Learn From Asian Women?

[FelaShrine]

One thing I have noticed about Asian women is that totally embrace their femininity. But they tend to act like they can't do anything, while they are actually manipulating everyone around them and getting others to do the dirty work.

LOL isnt this how most successful wives operate? I mean alot o the married women here have suggested the same.

 

[FelaShrine]

I already guessed she was Ethiopian, to.

I figured it out from the post in the "do you discuss black people with others" thread

 

[fasika]

Is there something wrong with being Ethiopian? huh:

 

[gforceroy]

SophieDulce
I live in misawa now! I have not been to southern Japan yet though...

 

[Belle Du Jour]

im not buying. in all honesty i think you should probably really examine why this question occurred to you and why you were so intrigued by it that you publicly asked this forum of black women knowing what the reaction would be.

With all due respect, it doesn't matter to me if you don't believe me and I don't need to do any self-examination. This is a forum for exchanging ideas.

 

[Belle Du Jour]

southernbella

ITA also.

I thought the OP was clear that we don't need to compare as though we are the latter. I think I was having a #brandnew momenterplexed, because I'm confused at the turn the thread has taken. Maybe I didn't understand what was truly being asked. I dunno' now.

Still, I'd like to take a stab at answering one of your question posed above about "looking else where" with a personal example. I hope I'm not too far off:

Japanese culture was the first I was exposed to (before American mainstream culture) and I even had a Sensei (we could refer to her as nothing else, I never heard her name!) who taught me (and other second grade girls) how to walk in kimono, sit properly, cook, "be a sweet wife" all of that --which is invaluable, still, to this day --with some updating.

That said, when I started retraining myself in high-school to be feminine, I started with what I had learned from Traditional Japanese culture and then looked to notable Black Women from the 1930-1950s to see someone who looked like ME that embodied the same principles I first learned from an EA/Traditional Japanese perspective.

The Colored-Girl Beautiful was a great read for that reason as well.


Culturally, Black Women are not taught the idea of being "living art". That Japanese principle has a lot of applications. The strength we have is unstoppable, but it must be wielded deftly to not be dulled by stereotypes beyond our control.

The legacy of the amazing AA women that came before us is ours to take as well, combined with other useful ideas/points-of-view from other cultures we're #winning.

That's where observing other cultures can be potentially useful --but, not in demeaning ourselves!

I think it's okay to draw upon things that have helped women in general advance, across cultures. That's where I thought this thread was going....

Black women are tops as you said --we just need to employ our awesome-ness in more effective ways to counter-act the negative PR we're dealing with today, that other groups don't have standing in their way.

I really hope that isn't lost in the melee in this thread.

I always appreciate your thoughts

 

[meesch]

With all due respect, it doesn't matter to me if you don't believe me and I don't need to do any self-examination. This is a forum for exchanging ideas.

jw, believe you about what? oh, i believe you alright

 

[barbiesocialite]

One thing I have noticed about Asian women is that totally embrace their femininity. But they tend to act like they can't do anything, while they are actually manipulating everyone around them and getting others to do the dirty work.

CurlyMoo what's wrong with that?

forget Asian women, that's how *I* operate. I don't do anything I don't have to do, don't want to do or can get someone else to do

 

[Gin&Tonic]

This thread could have been great. The reason that this thread failed is the reason the black community is failing.

We see things as individuals , sometimes to the detriment of the group.

A song comes on at the club disrespecting black women and sisters dance. "that songs not about me."

The media stereotypes us to the point that a few ghetto people are seen as the norm , and sisters watch. How many of you have seen threads on this forum about a show reinforceing the worst stereotypes . People say the will watch to watch how "ratchet " it will be.

We have no clue that the media is the way we reinforce positive stereotypes to get ahead and have it easier . THIS IS NOT ABOUT WHITE PEEN. It's about going to a job interview, to work, to school and people see you coming with anticipation- not dread.

We need group pride. We need to keep our crazy friends off Maury and take up collection for their DNA tests . We need to reject being a baby's Momma when we are poor.

Asian women historically were seen as this country's Hos. Remember "me love you long time"? They pushed their hos into the background.

We came up from slavery and Jim crow , trying to be a "credit to our race". We knew that if one of acts stereotypically - it hurts us all.

Now our money goes to support widespread coonery for the world to see. No shame. The jokes are funny!

About jokes. Watch comedy central closely one day. See black female comedians talk about us. watch Asians. They point out positive stereotypes as if the are true and ignore the negatives. We point out the negatives as if they are true.

Do we even have any positive stereotypes. No! We handed them over to the Mexicans.

I don't think i will see widespread change. This weekend I saw the worst behavior exhibited by black women all over my town. The sneeziest clothes. And No ! No one dresses like sluts like we do ! All around the major parts of the city . Now our women who were known as the salt of the earth- hardworking -walk 10 miles for the boycott .

Now it us saying "me love you long time ." I know you will say I am bashing black women. The eyes don't lie. Go to the mall or the gas station. Not in the hood . Ride all over town. The stereotypes affect us to. Young girls think learning to navigate a stripper pole is a lofty goal . But still folks don't see what the media is doing and has done to us.

This ish needs to be addressed , but it won't be. It never is. Folks are catching feelings and taking thing personal while our communities lose and our kids flunk out of high school,cant get jobs and fatherless kids suffer.

It's not about thinking Asians are better. Insert anyone you want into the scenario. Let's just fix this. It's really out of hand and if you don't see it, you are in a fantasy world .

Me - I'm living my most compelling life , checking things off of my goal list. I don't want to be the exception all the time. am tired of being the lone black chick surrounded by Asian and white women.

Sadly I am starting to see that many of us like being the blue unicorn, and those many times are the ones derailing threads. There are some blacks who actually profit from all of this.

 

[TrueToHair]

..............................

 

[Crackers Phinn]

MBA coursework is a series of classes where you study business case models, mostly how a business grew itself into an industry leader or how a failing company reinvented itself to compete in its industry.


When I read the OP I thought of it in terms of case study.

There is something to be said for a group of women with a propensity for not marrying broke.

 

[Ogoma]

MBA coursework is a series of classes where you study business case models, mostly how a business grew itself into an industry leader or how a failing company reinvented itself to compete in its industry.


When I read the OP I thought of it in terms of case study.

There is something to be said for a group of women with a propensity for not marrying broke.[/QUOTE]

This is where being Canadian fails me. I know rich Asians, poor Asians, and middle income Asians.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

MBA coursework is a series of classes where you study business case models, mostly how a business grew itself into an industry leader or how a failing company reinvented itself to compete in its industry.


When I read the OP I thought of it in terms of case study.

There is something to be said for a group of women with a propensity for not marrying broke.

This is where being Canadian fails me. I know rich Asians, poor Asians, and middle income Asians.

Of the 'poor Asians' that you know, were the men poor when they married? $hit happens across the board, people hitting hard times is a reality, but most Asian immigrant women are not marrying poor Asian men en masse.

BTW broke and middle income are not the same thing.

 

[Ogoma]

Of the 'poor Asians' that you know, were the men poor when they married? $hit happens across the board, people hitting hard times is a reality, but most Asian immigrant women are not marrying poor Asian men en masse.

BTW broke and middle income are not the same thing.

Yes. There are Asians here that have been poor for generations. Again, in Canada we have a large Asian population with all types even the drug dealers, the gang members, and murderers (murder capital of Canada - Edmonton with a 20% Asian population), as well as the geniuses and everything in between.

We don't have only the special unicorns you guys seem to be solely surrounded by in the US.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

Yes. There are Asians here that have been poor for generations. Again, in Canada we have a large Asian population with all types even the drug dealers, the gang members, and murderers (murder capital of Canada - Edmonton with a 20% Asian population), as well as the geniuses and everything in between.

We don't have only the special unicorns you guys seem to be solely surrounded by in the US.

Welp, then I don't know what to tell you. Perhaps there's something in the water here that grows unicorns that make above minimum wage.

 

[lux10023]

ditto

im familair with these types as well..UE and LE asians which is why i wont be learning a got damn thing from the women...lolol

brings me back to the notion when you travel and go outside ya lil city or neighborhoods you get to see how races of all walks of life live...

in nyc we have a massive asian pop here and lets just say---ive seen it all with them....upper..lower..and in btwn lol

tis all.


eta--blk women are awesome!!! i live and breathe this errrdayyyy...blk ppl are awesome is my loa universe...errrdayyyyyyyy

Yes. There are Asians here that have been poor for generations. Again, in Canada we have a large Asian population with all types even the drug dealers, the gang members, and murderers (murder capital of Canada - Edmonton with a 20% Asian population), as well as the geniuses and everything in between.

We don't have only the special unicorns you guys seem to be solely surrounded by in the US.

 

[Gin&Tonic]

MBA coursework is a series of classes where you study business case models, mostly how a business grew itself into an industry leader or how a failing company reinvented itself to compete in its industry.

When I read the OP I thought of it in terms of case study.

There is something to be said for a group of women with a propensity for not marrying broke.

I saw it the same way. I am an MBA too. I guess that's why I did not pick apart every word . I saw the OPs point . She wants to brainstorm and share ideas in order to improving our collective net worth .

 

[Mortons]

Most of the asian women who married asian men that I am aquainted with marry into their ses or similar, aside from those in the military. Or are we only talking asian women who marry out?

 

[LivingInPeace]

Yes. There are Asians here that have been poor for generations. Again, in Canada we have a large Asian population with all types even the drug dealers, the gang members, and murderers (murder capital of Canada - Edmonton with a 20% Asian population), as well as the geniuses and everything in between.

We don't have only the special unicorns you guys seem to be solely surrounded by in the US.

Not the 'unicorns'!!!! Love it!!!!
People seem to be trading in a whole bunch of stereotypes, positive and negative in this thread. No group of women has cornered the market on specialness. Others may get better press than black women but we are all individuals who exhibit good and bad qualities. Instead of trying to figure out what one race of women can teach us, how about you talk to individual women who you admire and listen to their wisdom?

 

[onyxdreams]

This is sad. Please believe other race of women study us, they watch us for what they can imitate and what they can disregard. I agree with the poster that stated we are to individualistic when responding to a thread. Unfortunately the black community is stuck on this hard mentality.Thuggish, tough exterior the evidence is in our children, our young women sound exactly like our young men cursing,willing to fight and willing to disrespect anyone.

As for the topic of the thread, why not discuss what we can learn from black women of the past,black women from the past generations? How has the media mutated the black woman's image ?

 

[Ogoma]

As someone with an MBA as well, I don't see what that has to do with recognizing it was a question based on a false premise. The only thing you get from asking what can we learn from company x about achieving the largest market share in this market when company x does not have the largest market share in said market is an assessment on the observation skills, intelligence, or tendency to rely on stereotypes of the asker.

 

[meesch]

Yes. There are Asians here that have been poor for generations. Again, in Canada we have a large Asian population with all types even the drug dealers, the gang members, and murderers (murder capital of Canada - Edmonton with a 20% Asian population), as well as the geniuses and everything in between.

We don't have only the special unicorns you guys seem to be solely surrounded by in the US.

there is no such thing as a poor asian

it is impossible

 

[Ogoma]

Can I ask why do black people have a hard time saying 'I', 'me', 'my' when it comes to anything negative? Why always the 'black community' or 'we'? What is this constant need to assume your negative traits are shared amongst all black people, but the positive ones are just you?

'We' all don't need to stop being aggressive/stop having careless sex/stop marrying broke/stop being thuggish. 'We' all don't share your same micro-culture. If you, your friends, family, circle, etc engage in this behavior, then speak to this phenom amongst your group, stop deciding all black women engage in the same behavior. I don't know these types of people and have rarely even seen one IRL.

 

[onyxdreams]

The same reason we hear a horrific news story and immediately pray please don't let that be a black person.

I've never been in a drive by or arrested but ,I still cringe hold my breath and say just don't let him be black.

I do understand what your saying though.

 

[Gin&Tonic]

Can I ask why do black people have a hard time saying 'I', 'me', 'my' when it comes to anything negative? Why always the 'black community' or 'we'? What is this constant need to assume your negative traits are shared amongst all black people, but the positive ones are just you?

'We' all don't need to stop being aggressive/stop having careless sex/stop marrying broke/stop being thuggish. 'We' all don't share your same micro-culture. If you, your friends, family, circle, etc engage in this behavior, then speak to this phenom amongst your group, stop deciding all black women engage in the same behavior. I don't know these types of people and have rarely even seen one IRL.

Actually, I don't know any black people personally that have any of the problems that I I know are a problem in society. I don't even know anyone who is unemployed, battling addiction or had a foreclosure. I do know that anytime I can help my my people, I do. I don't have to "know" them.

I think "we" -whatever the circumstances ,because black people are my people. I am not going to leave them behind for any reason. I want the best for my people. I assume that people who say "we" feel the same way.

 

[TrueToHair]

We don't have only the special unicorns you guys seem to be solely surrounded by in the US.

There has also been an extraordinary sighting of unicorns since Zuckerberg's wedding day.

As a side note, the person who raised the "net worth" issue brings up a good point. I'm not talking about perceived net worth and stereotypes - I'm talking about actual net worth. The average net worth of the black family is around $5,000. That's the reality if you average out the number of black people who live in poverty and the richest black Americans (so I understand the range is high). A thread on improving the reality/ actual net worth/etc would seem pretty productive to me. It seems to me that changing acutal conditions will provide resources that change the negative side effects of generational poverty (hardness, style of dress, etc).

The problem I have with this thread is the idea that you should fight generalizations with generalizations, stereotypes with stereotypes, etc. Forgive me if I have it wrong, but how exactly is that going to work? But improving something tangible might yield the results that I believe you all are seeking. So yeah, back to looking up stuff on actual net worth, actual practices, etc.....

 

[Nefertiti0906]

It's not just about American women btw. The dress culture in the US affects all of us, including us immigrants. Most of my female relatives complain they've let themselves go since moving to the US since it's such a casual culture. When we're in Addis, locals can tell which ones are on vaca from the US and which ones from Europe just by our dress . And ask any Ethiopian you'll meet - the weeks before our trip back, we shop like mad people so that we won't look so unstylish when we return, so that's a double lol

ITA. My aunt recently visited from Nigeria and she couldn't understand why Americans were so casual. Every time before we left the house to go on an outing, she reminded me to put on my earrings and put on some make up even when the trip was to a grocery store

 

[TrueToHair]

..........................

 

[Crackers Phinn]

As someone with an MBA as well, I don't see what that has to do with recognizing it was a question based on a false premise. The only thing you get from asking what can we learn from company x about achieving the largest market share in this market when company x does not have the largest market share in said market is an assessment on the observation skills, intelligence, or tendency to rely on stereotypes of the asker.

I disagree with the question being based on a false premise. If I take emotions out of the equation the core of the OP's question is Marketing 101. Two groups, differentent perceptions in the marketplace, how does one change it's perception or branding? Whether I like it or not stereotypes are a form of PR and as case study shows PR can be manipulated to promote whatever image the merchandiser wants to portray.

Now if I want to be emotional about it then yeah I can have the same old discussions with the same tired dialogue and ending up in the same place I started at. But then what's the point?

 

[Mai Tai]

Wonder how everyone feels about this thread? Had me thinking.

http://www.longhaircareforum.com/showthread.php?t=630033

Again, I understand if it's about methods and philosophy, but I do hope we're not putting people on a pedestal who don't even respect us.

I came right over to this thread after your post in the the other thread just to see if you posted about this modern day Asian-based minstrel show...

Those four asian women in that picture just taught me to love myself even more and not wait for the rest of the world to do so because IT AIN'T HAPPENING...