CaraWalker
Well-Known Member
i think the thing is being "ready." i almost had sex in i think 9th grade and when he was about to try i burst into tears because i wasnt ready. so after that i knew i wasnt going to do it, until one day i decided i wanted to.Yea but that doesnt apply to most. Literally like a unicorn sighting.
so i dont think people need to be feeling some kind of way about not doing it yet because its not about them but their thought process about sex. i hear a lot that people just havent found anyone to do it with. where i get confused about is what does that have to do with your desire to have sex? are you just not particularly interested, the hormones arent killing you yet? or are you hinging your feelings about your sexual experience on who the other person is and what they say and do to you and your thoughts about them? i think THATS maladaptive and not what someone should wholly base their decision to have sex on... so its like the older and older you get are you still holding on to this fantasy of the other person, and YOUR thoughts about yourself and your sexuality havent changed at all as the years go by?
so maybe thats what people mean when they relate it to maturity and a naivete. the longer you go without "growing out" of that, so to speak, your emotional development can came across as stunted/immature. it depends on the individual though only they really know what theyre waiting for.