FemmeFatale
Well-Known Member
We'll just agree to disagree.
Spin-off : If You Hit Your Boyfriend/husband
- Thread starter vani
- Start date
We'll just agree to disagree.
vani
Well-Known Member
MamitaLolita
Well-Known Member
menina
Believing the book of Revelations
Yes and the undertone of your posts in this thread is equally telling and sad.
Actually that prison thing is correct. In some countries prisoners are released during the weekends to go and stay with their wives and families. They dont have any issues with them coming back on Monday and making no trouble on the weekends. They have swimming pools and farms at the prison and everything. MUCH less in prison fighting, scheming, and the like.
There are some cultures which do have an undertone of the use of force and violence and others that are a bit more calm. Nothing new.
ETA: The country wasnt Russia that I saw though one of the prisons might have been the Ukraine. Gotta check.
There are some cultures which do have an undertone of the use of force and violence and others that are a bit more calm. Nothing new.
ETA: The country wasnt Russia that I saw though one of the prisons might have been the Ukraine. Gotta check.
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Femmefatal1981
Well-Known Member
What does you wanting the right to go ape crap crazy on a guy and have him stand there and take it have to do with slavery? The only undertone I see here is one of y'all wanting to act like crazy emotionally unstable white women and be rewarded for it. Personally I believe that's crazy. Even if a man never puts his hands on you in response to your outburst best believe there will still be consequences from a man with any self respect or dignity.
I believe in getting what I want, 100% of the time but throwing tantrums like a 2 yr old...life has shown me that long term that's not how I want to live.
Supervixen
Well-Known Member
YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you so much for this whole post bc I was lost with the slavery reference.
AND, I dont recall (from the movie) Ms. Celie hitting Mister, let alone hitting him first...
FemmeFatale
Well-Known Member
I don't throw tantrums, hit men nor am I advocating it. But a man putting his hands on a woman? Zero tolerance.
I posted a video of this black guy who choked a girl (his girlfriend!) out unconscious because they got into an argument and she slapped him. The guy almost killed her and was appalled that he was being charged since she started it. The girl dropped the charges too, smh. I'm positive the response here would've been "oh well, it was her fault".
Violence is the norm in the BC and I think slavery has a lot to do with it.
Supervixen
Well-Known Member
I have zero tolerance both ways.
I agree that violence is all too common in many black communities the world over. I agree it is tied to slavery, colonization, and all forms of the dehumanizing interactions black people have had with whites.
A combination of powerlessness + a learned hatred and devaluing of each other = greater violence in and out of the home.
???FemmeFatale
Well-Known Member
Yep it's a nasty cycle and we've (general) been conditioned to think nothing of it.
Femmefatal1981
Well-Known Member
But that is what you have been advocating through out this thread. The right to slap and bit get slapped back. I don't know if violence is the norm in the BC because it's not the norm in my circle, but violence goes both ways.
A guy what would choke a girlfriend out doesn't need to be slapped in order to do it. That was merely his excuse. However, violence often begets violence. When you hit someone you open pandora a box. I was raised not to hit because you will get hit back. My Mom never specified if it applied to males or females. I have never been hit by a man and hell would rain down on any man why tried me.
Femmefatal1981
Well-Known Member
menina
Believing the book of Revelations
Right. Next is woman on woman violence and man on man violence. The stance stops being so solid after a while.
Some of you need to get out more, read more, and travel more. Nations in Latin America alone - made up of racially black, white, and pockets of Asian people suffer very high rates of DV.
DV is not just a problem in the black communities. DV is a problem faced by women worldwide.
So to sit there and try to shape the issue of DV as a black issue that only black women are condoning is kind of sick.
MEN are the main perpetrators of DV and so frankly MEN are the ones doing it and condoning it. In societies around the world, regardless of race - women have been conditioned with violence to question when a man hits a woman as opposed to standing up against it. Vocally. They too are victims. They are not the ones to be disrespected or for other women to criticize like what is going on this thread.
The way people are talking in this thread, it's as if a woman saying a man should hit back....is the actual act of hitting a woman. No matter what a woman says, the problem is when a MEN HITS A WOMAN. Period. I don't care what a woman says. If men don't hit women - we no longer have the grave problem of DV!!
Some of you posters want to come as pro-women or pro women's rights - but the hatred and disdain you have for women, specifically black women is insane!!! This thread should be about the disdain we feel for MEN who hit women. And we can educate those women who feel that men should hit women (which I'm not seeing too much of here).
But instead this thread is about deriding the black women community as a whole. It's sick and unnecessary.
DV is not just a problem in the black communities. DV is a problem faced by women worldwide.
So to sit there and try to shape the issue of DV as a black issue that only black women are condoning is kind of sick.
MEN are the main perpetrators of DV and so frankly MEN are the ones doing it and condoning it. In societies around the world, regardless of race - women have been conditioned with violence to question when a man hits a woman as opposed to standing up against it. Vocally. They too are victims. They are not the ones to be disrespected or for other women to criticize like what is going on this thread.
The way people are talking in this thread, it's as if a woman saying a man should hit back....is the actual act of hitting a woman. No matter what a woman says, the problem is when a MEN HITS A WOMAN. Period. I don't care what a woman says. If men don't hit women - we no longer have the grave problem of DV!!
Some of you posters want to come as pro-women or pro women's rights - but the hatred and disdain you have for women, specifically black women is insane!!! This thread should be about the disdain we feel for MEN who hit women. And we can educate those women who feel that men should hit women (which I'm not seeing too much of here).
But instead this thread is about deriding the black women community as a whole. It's sick and unnecessary.
And this is nothing wrong with this view bc guess what there are some punk 5'4 35 year old BOYS who would hit a woman or would hit back. Thinking this way doesn't mean you condone a man hitting a woman or think it's correct. You just know there are weak boys out there with no morale character, respect, or dignity and would stoop so low. The goal is not date, marry, or give these people any time of day!
FemmeFatale
Well-Known Member
No I said if a woman hits a man, he should leave before it escalates further, and/ or call the cop and press charges. Teach her a lesson. There are more productive ways to retaliate than hitting back.
Femmefatal1981
Well-Known Member
Most definitely but being productive isn't on the mind of anyone who just got hit. All these unraised people out here hitting folks are the reason this is even a thread. If I had a son I'd tell him to walk away and never come back if a woman hits you. My daughters will be told to control themselves and walk away from any man who makes you want to strike him. Walk away because you were raised better and for your safety because he may not have been raised better.
FemmeFatale
Well-Known Member
With my last point, I'm dead serious and I stand by it. People need to get out more bc the things I see being written is crazy to me. And as a black woman, a community member, I won't stand for it. Call it slick, indignant, or snarky. I stand by it and believe it.
And you have been passive aggressive all up in through this thread. You're hardly quoting anyone but making your own slick and derogatory comments, twisting arguments to make a point. And then you backtrack.
So...now you are saying all along you've just been saying that men should not hit women. Ok we agree. From the beginning this has been the main agreement from mostly everyone. So then what was the point if your other posts about black women condoning this and that or effects of slavery doing a number or tones being "telling" in the thread. What's the point for all of the noise ...if that's not what you are saying....
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FemmeFatale
Well-Known Member
I've been consistent with my point. People asked for an explanation and I gave it. Was it PC? No, but hey not everything is.
The women that egg men on.. No words.
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Well obviously I don't care if it is PC. Are my posts PC according to you? Not at all.
You've been consistent with your main point and you're making other points too (along with other people), which I have responded to in that last long post. You don't have to like it or agree with it but why decry my posts as indignant, snarky, or whatever when you are in here doing the same exact thing. I don't get it either.
FemmeFatale
Well-Known Member
Ok........
Crackers Phinn
Either A Blessing Or A Lesson.
While I think this is very strongly worded, I agree that it bothers people less if you insert a black woman (particularly a certain kind of black woman) into the scenario of getting hit regardless of the reason.
The hood chick getting hit back doesn't bother people because maybe it'll knock some sense into her.
Supervixen
Well-Known Member
I do not have a dog in this fight other than seeing bw in this thread referred to as mules, LE, Ms. Celie, unprivileged, etc bc we had differing opinions. The negative assumptions of fellow bw based on a difference of opinion struck me as unnecessary.
This comes back to my point in this thread, expect to get what you put out there...name calling/snark begets name calling/snarl.
This comes back to my point in this thread, expect to get what you put out there...name calling/snark begets name calling/snarl.
Femmefatal1981
Well-Known Member
Now that you bring it up, I think you are right.
sj10460
Don't Come for me unless I send for you!
So, I was just awaken by a couple of local ratchets. An AA couple that appeared to be teenagers/early 20s got into a physical altercation because the boyfriend/baby daddy was caught cheating. The young woman/mother had their infant child attached to her via baby carrier. There was some arguing and yelling from both sides then I heard what sounded like a hit. I got up from my bed and witness the mother continuously punch the father like primeape from pokemon. He kept telling her to stop and the baby starting crying. I walked over to my living so I could get a better view from my balcony 
A man pulled up in a SUV and asked what was going on. The father explained that she was crazy and attacking him. The driver told the father to just leave because she had a baby. He then told the mother to leave him alone. As the driver was talking to the father, the mother socked him from the back of his head twice. The driver said he was calling the cops and pulled off.
After the driver left, the baby started crying even louder.
The father shouted to take his baby home. The mother continued to follow the father and while trying to hit him. I yelled from my widow "Why are you still following him?" The father replied, thank you. I hope everyone sees how crazy you are. The ratchet told me to mind my f- business. I told them I was calling the cops and the father pleaded with me not to. The mother caught up to the father and socked him in the head again. He tried to cover his face and it looked like his hand hit the child. The father then turned around and punched the mother (with baby in tow) in the face like the bus driver from Cleveland. The mother fell on the ground with baby. I called the cops and told them what happened. You could hear the baby screaming The father ran away.
As I'm on the phone with the police, a white couple walks into the mist of the altercation. They only see the mother on the ground and ask what happen. They said they heard argument and fighting but I don't reply then the guy says, I'm glad we're getting the f- out of here. I yelled it happens in Georgetown too
A man pulled up in a SUV and asked what was going on. The father explained that she was crazy and attacking him. The driver told the father to just leave because she had a baby. He then told the mother to leave him alone. As the driver was talking to the father, the mother socked him from the back of his head twice. The driver said he was calling the cops and pulled off.
After the driver left, the baby started crying even louder.
The father shouted to take his baby home. The mother continued to follow the father and while trying to hit him. I yelled from my widow "Why are you still following him?" The father replied, thank you. I hope everyone sees how crazy you are. The ratchet told me to mind my f- business. I told them I was calling the cops and the father pleaded with me not to. The mother caught up to the father and socked him in the head again. He tried to cover his face and it looked like his hand hit the child. The father then turned around and punched the mother (with baby in tow) in the face like the bus driver from Cleveland. The mother fell on the ground with baby. I called the cops and told them what happened. You could hear the baby screaming The father ran away.As I'm on the phone with the police, a white couple walks into the mist of the altercation. They only see the mother on the ground and ask what happen. They said they heard argument and fighting but I don't reply then the guy says, I'm glad we're getting the f- out of here. I yelled it happens in Georgetown too
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