So I Just Quickly Scanned Dh What's Up

[hopeful]

Good luck @Ganjababy. I wish you luck with the marital counseling but my number one concern is you, your happiness, and your wellbeing. Hang in there. Try to have a relaxing weekend. Do something special for yourself.

 

[SweetNic_JA]

Whoooa. This!



This thread has made me see things much clearer and has helped me to verbalize some things I was feeling but was not able to put into words.

His indifference has played into my BPD and has resulted in me acting more crazy and irrational to get a reaction/attention from him. I think we are co-dependent. We had a talk yesterday and we both decided to unlock our phones and be more transparent.

He started locking his phone after I started locking mine. He has major trust issues also -his indifference has made me a bit too receptive to the flirtation of others and it has caused huge arguments and distrust.

We have decided to go back to marriage counseling. One last ditch effort. He has also agreed to go to individual counseling for himself. He agreed before but I was scared that he would come to his senses and leave me. But I have to just face reality and try to fix all areas of my life and if that means the end of our marriage then so be it. We both deserve less chaos. Last night we discussed what will happen and how we will divide our assets if we cannot make it work...

He needs to make you laugh again, and care about your happiness and well-being. If not him, then make your self available to let someone else do it. I truly wish you the best.

 

[caribeandiva]

@Ganjababy Good luck with everything. I hope you don’t get divorced. I pray everything works out for the best for you and your husband. You gotta do what’s best for you and your wellbeing. It seems you and your husband are at least communicating better and choosing to get help. That’s a great sign!

 

[biznesswmn]

Deep thread
God bless you @Ganjababy

 

[GeorginaSparks]

how are things? i dont want this to take a toll on your health @Ganjababy

 

[Ganjababy]

Hanging in there....

how are things? i dont want this to take a toll on your health @Ganjababy

 

[Ganjababy]

I feel like such a failure. But today I went to a presentation on cognitive processing therapy for DBT and CPT for people with ptsd and people with borderline personality disorder and depression.

At the end this young man who has all 3 disorders shared his experience. He did the program 6 moths ago and he is a changed man. I was in tears. He was homeless and suicidal before the program. He could not interact with his family and was a drunk. Now he is a motivational speaker. Has a job and has decided to go back to college to become a trained mental health worker. He gave me hope.


Just trying to survive at this time...

I wanted to share this with you ladies. I woke up wanting to die. But I am feeling hopeful at the end of this day...

 

[caribeandiva]

I feel like such a failure. But today I went to a presentation on cognitive processing therapy for DBT and CPT for people with ptsd and people with borderline personality disorder and depression.

At the end this young man who has all 3 disorders shared his experience. He did the program 6 moths ago and he is a changed man. I was in tears. He was homeless and suicidal before the program. He could not interact with his family and was a drunk. Now he is a motivational speaker. Has a job and has decided to go back to college to become a trained mental health worker. He gave me hope.


Just trying to survive at this time...

I wanted to share this with you ladies. I woke up wanting to die. But I am feeling hopeful at the end of this day...

That’s great to hear!

 

[FlowerHair]

Interesting thread. Even if you feel like a failure, your tone is much healthier than it’s been before IMO. I know you can get through this illness and come out on the other side. I’m sorry your closest people are insensitive towards you.

This thread made me take a look at myself and my situation. Thanks.

 

[msbettyboop]

If she feels that comfortable saying such a horrible thing to your husband, maybe it's because that's the impression he gives when he's having conversations with her about you?

I'd just stop talking to her. I'm petty like that..

 

[lesedi]

I feel like such a failure. But today I went to a presentation on cognitive processing therapy for DBT and CPT for people with ptsd and people with borderline personality disorder and depression.

At the end this young man who has all 3 disorders shared his experience. He did the program 6 moths ago and he is a changed man. I was in tears. He was homeless and suicidal before the program. He could not interact with his family and was a drunk. Now he is a motivational speaker. Has a job and has decided to go back to college to become a trained mental health worker. He gave me hope.


Just trying to survive at this time...

I wanted to share this with you ladies. I woke up wanting to die. But I am feeling hopeful at the end of this day...

Don't overwhelm yourself @Ganjababy, just think of it as getting through one day at a time. You need to be kinder to yourself- you are an inspiration to many and although I don't know you, I admire your bravery.

Try and think of the peak of your day every night before you close your eyes and think of one thing you are grateful for.

There is so much to be hopeful about sis!
Xx

 

[Virtuosa]

@Ganjababy You are handling this with so much grace. You should be proud of your progress and the honesty you are having with yourself. It’s so so hard to do. We are blessed to have you here and I KNOW others are motivated and inspired by your example. Keep taking good care of Ganjababy.

 

[Black Ambrosia]

The honesty and compassion in this thread is heartwarming. Most times I liken this forum to living in a dorm with the camaraderie and shared experiences. We don’t know each other but we’re brought together by our exchanges. This thread, however, feels like a conversation among close friends or sisters. It’s obvious how much we all want @Ganjababy to win. This is a blessing.

 

[movingforward13]

@Ganjababy
You are loved
You are wanted
You are cared for....

If you need that reminder- my inbox is open.

 

[intellectualuva]

Sending positive vibes your way @Ganjababy

Give yourself all the grace you need.

This thread really has some wonderful gems in it. @hopeful you really offer some incredible actionable insights.

 

[Ganjababy]

I cannot, ever thank you ladies enough! You all are a godsend and I really appreciate you all.

I hope I can pass on all this caring and love to someone else in need. Pm me if anyone reading this needs something.

We black/women of colour are the best thing since sliced bread. Better than sliced bread!

You ladies will never know how much you have positively influenced and helped me during these last years. Love you all.

And no. This is from the heart and not a bottle lol...

I kinda feel embarrassed because of all the love I am getting in this thread...

 

[caribeandiva]

I cannot, ever thank you ladies enough! You all are a godsend and I really appreciate you all.

I hope I can pass on all this caring and love to someone else in need. Pm me if anyone reading this needs something.

We black/women of colour are the best thing since sliced bread. Better than sliced bread!

You ladies will never know how much you have posively influenced and helped me during these las years. Love you all.

And no. This is from the heart and not a bottle lol...

I kinda feel embarrassed because of all the love I am getting in this thread...

Awww... we love you too boo!

 

[DarkJoy]

G!! !!

 

[Evolving78]

@Ganjababy
I’m glad you are feeling positive! I understand what you are going through. Make sure you get help and support in whatever it is you need.