Single ladies: do you know why you're single?

mischka

mischka

shrinkage.
Let's not be delusional and say there are no eligible men out there or THEY'RE the ones with the problem... lol... or do we really not know? I've been thinking about it lately and I think I've finally discovered some of the reasons I am PERPETUALLY single...


  1. I am very, very, very quick to walk away from a guy the first time he does something I don't like
  2. I overthink everything when I really like a guy
  3. I am uncomfortable allowing myself to be vulnerable/uncomfortable with many forms of affection
  4. I can be dismissive/snotty/argumentative when I feel I am right
  5. I resent too much infringement on my personal/alone time

What say you?
 
Well, I've been single my entire life and I'm okay with that.
After I graduate in April I will have more time to date.

Most of the males at my campus are not looking for long term relationships,
I refuse to settle or lower my standards,
I'm shy when meeting the opposite sex
Like OP, I'm always over analyzing the intention(s) of males
I need to learn how to smile more :ohwell: *working on this*
I love my alone time

Most importantly, I'm working on myself this year...
 
I don't go out like I used to. And when I do I get shy around guys I have an attraction to. uggghhhhh - I am too old for this.
 
I'm not the typical aesthetic
Im very straightforward-some men dont like that
I have been hurt by ppl quite a bit so maybe I still have wounds
I have a natural hard look so maybe I'm not approachable
I dont know where to go to meet nice men.Clubs arent the biz for me.
 
I'm single because...

I don't go out a lot. (I'm in law school and finishing my MA so I don't really have time.)
I admit I'm slow to warm up to people, especially romantically.
I don't look my age. I'm 23 but I look 16.
I cling strongly to my alone time.
I over analyze.
 
mischka said:
Let's not be delusional and say there are no eligible men out there or THEY'RE the ones with the problem... lol... or do we really not know? I've been thinking about it lately and I think I've finally discovered some of the reasons I am PERPETUALLY single...


  1. I am very, very, very quick to walk away from a guy the first time he does something I don't like
  2. I overthink everything when I really like a guy
  3. I am uncomfortable allowing myself to be vulnerable/uncomfortable with many forms of affection
  4. I can be dismissive/snotty/argumentative when I feel I am right
  5. I resent too much infringement on my personal/alone time

What say you?
Click to expand...

Are we twins? "Ur list" is "my list"!!!


Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
 
Yea, I can't front, it's 100% by choice. I work full time and attend school full-time. Guys try alot but I know I don't have the time/energy to dedicate to it for the time being. I'm also kinda ruthless:look: so when my time is freed up some more I'm gonna be nicer and really have fun dating. I feel when I graduate I'll really be on the market full force.


Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
 
By choice right now until I find someone that I want to settle down with.

I also don't go out much.
Deep down, there's some discomfort in me about meeting new men and getting to know them and vice versa. More specifically, I wonder if we'll "click" and we're into each other. I really do not feel meeting several dudes just to figure this out. I know it's the introvert in me that's causing some of this uneasyness.
 
Let's see because I get shy around guys, people have told me I look unapproachable (working on it) , I don't look my age I'm 29 and look like I'm in my early twenties so guys who do approach me are really young. And I hang out a lot with my ex so guys probably think I'm with him (working on This also)

Sent from my HERO200 using Long Hair Care Forum App
 
tbh it's because I have a "list" and I stick to it. Some overshoot the list and I feel intimidated, others just don't make the cut.

I would like to be in a relationship, however, I prefer to be with someone that I truly enjoy every essence of the relationship with and my heart races just with the thought of the next step versus someone with whom I'm just biding time until Mr. Right comes along.
 
I totally gave up.
All the jerks or guys I can't stand or don't want like that seem to like me.
All the seemingly nice guys I meet and would like to get to know better are not interested in me like that.
I always get the " You will make someone a good wife someday" speech all the time and I'm sick to death of it.
.
 
Single not by choice

I'm naturally unapproachable. I tend to have a "closed-off" look at all times to ward away unwanted male attention, but I guess it wards off wanted make attention too. :lol:
 
mischka said:
Let's not be delusional and say there are no eligible men out there or THEY'RE the ones with the problem... lol... or do we really not know? I've been thinking about it lately and I think I've finally discovered some of the reasons I am PERPETUALLY single...


  1. I am very, very, very quick to walk away from a guy the first time he does something I don't like
  2. I overthink everything when I really like a guy
  3. I am uncomfortable allowing myself to be vulnerable/uncomfortable with many forms of affection
  4. I can be dismissive/snotty/argumentative when I feel I am right
  5. I resent too much infringement on my personal/alone time
What say you?
Click to expand...
Wow, I have to second everything you just said! I need to add to that the fact that I have to stop treating every guy as though he is my ex and punishing him for what the ex did.
 
I don't go out alot.
I don't go out alot.
I don't go out alot.

But then again it's winter.....this will change come April.

But I'm waiting for the RIGHT guy. I'm finally at a point that I see the type of guys (physically speaking) that does it for me.
 
1. I don't feel comfortable flirting or "showing" I'm available
2. I don't go anywhere where I would meet guys.
 
missware2003 said:
Are we twins? "Ur list" is "my list"!!!


Sent from my iPhone using LHCF
Click to expand...
THAT is exactly what I thought! Down to the last one. My closest friend says I have a morbid fear of getting hurt. I think he's right. I'm typically rational until I find I like a guy, who happens to be a good guy and is completely into me, then I go out of my way to sabotage it. SMH!!! I think I'm ready to put on my big-girl panties for the next opportunity I get though. I'm going to work really hard to shove those irrational fears right at the feet of Jesus :lachen:
 
I don't go out alot at all- especially during winter
Im not ready to settle down- I'd rather weigh my options for a while
I like my alone time- people can be so clingy
Im not willing to settle
 
Because Im reserved around males, I dont socialize with the opposite sex very often, I can be quite particular about my men
 
prettyfaceANB said:
Girl...no...:lachen:

When I get engaged, EVERYBODY gonna know. That will be the day some man managed to tame me.:lol: I am gonna throw a LHCF partee
Click to expand...
[USER]prettyfaceANDB[/USER]

I thought you were engaged as well!

ScorpioBeauty09
ScorpioBeauty09 said:
I'm single because...

I don't go out a lot. (I'm in law school and finishing my MA so I don't really have time.) I am a grad student.
 I admit I'm slow to warm up to people, especially romantically.
I cling strongly to my alone time.
I over analyze.
Click to expand...

TWIN!

I would also add that the men that I meet approach me in the incorrect way, like this dude asked me to his room at first meeting. Also they come dressed stupid. I would like your clothes to fit.
 
okange76 said:
I totally gave up.
All the jerks or guys I can't stand or don't want like that seem to like me.
All the seemingly nice guys I meet and would like to get to know better are not interested in me like that.
I always get the " You will make someone a good wife someday" speech all the time and I'm sick to death of it.
.
Click to expand...


Goodness, this always happens to me.

The men that I end up being interested in dont feel the same way about me...but the ones that are into me dont hold my interest. I also get these lines, "You're amazing. Beautiful. You would be a great wife. Why arent you pregnant and married aleady" these men end up not staying around too long.

Im convinced im not going to find someone for a loooong while..
 
I don't get out a lot. Especially, in NYC, I find you have to be out and about to meet males. When I go out, I get attention (usually not by the guys I would be attracted to but anyways).

Went out and got 3 numbers last night. hehe

But that, plus I'm full time in school and work so that keeps me busy (why I don't go out often). If I met the right guy, I would make time for him but its not a priority for me.
 
I don't go out alot.
I'm a single parent so I don't have a lot of availability.
I look younger than my age.
I'm attracted to a certain aesthetic that men whom I would view as potential dont seem to posess.
I don't like to share my man.
I've been hurt numerous times and as a result I am somewhat insecure and I don't trust men.
I need to work on me.

Sent from my LS670 using Long Hair Care Forum App
 
I don't go out alot.
I work full time and was in school full time.
I have a strong sense of self.
I don't like trifling men, but they really like me.

The real reason why I am single is because I am fat. I don't care what anyone else has to say, I know that if I wasn't severely overweight I would have an easier time meeting quality men.
 

True 2 all of these for me too + I'm finally implementing my high standards so not just any Tom, Dick and Harry will do plus I really want to date with the intention of leading 2 Marriage and most of the guys I do meet have non of those intentions or are jst after sum bootay!:lachen::nono: :ohwell:

LiftedUp said:
tbh it's because I have a "list" and I stick to it. Some overshoot the list and I feel intimidated, others just don't make the cut.

I would like to be in a relationship, however, I prefer to be with someone that I truly enjoy every essence of the relationship with and my heart races just with the thought of the next step versus someone with whom I'm just biding time until Mr. Right comes along. SO SO TRUE FOR ME RIGHT NOW
Click to expand...


okange76 said:
I totally gave up.
All the jerks or guys I can't stand or don't want like that seem to like me.
All the seemingly nice guys I meet and would like to get to know better are not interested in me like that.
I always get the " You will make someone a good wife someday" speech all the time and I'm sick to death of it.
.
Click to expand...

BGT said:
Single not by choice

I'm naturally unapproachable. I tend to have a "closed-off" look at all times to ward away unwanted male attention, but I guess it wards off wanted make attention too. :lol:
Click to expand...

Roland said:
1. I don't feel comfortable flirting or "showing" I'm available
2. I don't go anywhere where I would meet guys.
Click to expand...
 
I honestly think I am subconsciously keeping myself single. There's a lot of things I still have to work on internally before I can realli get into a relationship with someone...

too bad I don't know how to work on these 'issues' *shrugs*
 
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