My BFF just found out her husband is cheating on her with a MAN
- Thread starter NAPPYCHICK86
- Start date
No judge in Louisiana is going to give a gay man full custody of ANY child, and not after the sh!t he did. She's very lucky she's in the deep south, because he'll be lucky if he gets any visitation at all. After all, a lot of people think that gay men are child molesters for some reason. Have her lawyer find the most homophobic judge in the state, she'll get everything and he'll get his @ss handed to him.
Sorry it had to come to this.
Sorry it had to come to this.
awhyley
Well-Known Member
Yep. Just as soon as everything is finalized. He's been planning this for awhile and thats what is hurting her even more. He even threatened to take the kids away from her, but in all honesty I doubt a judge would grant him full custody. Its already worrying her that he's going to have to have the kids sometimes.
Only realized the thanks button was gone when I tried to thank this post. *thumbs up* There's no way that she should even be considering offering visitation of any kind. He had an affair, beat her, gave her an STD, brought his 'man friend' to the house along with tons of other stuff that probably hasn't come to light as yet; and he thinks that he wants custody too. His head hurtin, real bad too. He probably going to try to lowball her into accepting less alimony because of his threats. Tell her not to fall for that crap.
Ivonnovi
Well-Known Member
I believe your friend also has some "long term" self-esteem and self worth issues that probably started well before the marriage. I hope her counseling will help her deal with issues that lead to her "tolerating" the terms of this most recent disappointment and sham of a marriage. By "tolerating" I'm speaking of the STD and the "laying on of hands" and yet staying.
NAPPYCHICK86
New Member
IMHO before she married this guy she was so outspoken and confident. I dont know what he's done to her. I'm sure there's tons that I dont know and at this point I dont even want to know. He sent her a text last night saying that he's going to fight for whats his(the kids) but like I said no judge would ever grant that scumbag custody. I knew he was shady but I had know idea he was that inconsiderate. More and more is cming to the light and I just wish my friend wouldve been spoken up.
NAPPYCHICK86
New Member
NAPPYCHICK86
New Member
We've already began this process.
complexsimplicity
Well-Known Member
See, my problem is not the fact that he is gay. It's that he was lying to her, living this other life, gave her an STD, and he beat her. Dude had a whole 'nother apartment with his lover, living a double life and he expects a judge to hand the kids over to him like he deserves it? GTFOOHWTBS! I wouldn't even trust him with the kids even if he was leaving his wife for another woman let alone a man.
msdeevee
Well-Known Member
Couldn't read the whole thread so this may have been said already .
I think it's good to give her a place to stay especially that the rule has already been set that it's just for a week but if I were her with children, I would not leave my home. She has children she has the right to the home. She should put him out and start filing legal papers.
What he did and is doing is heinous but I would never advise anyone to divorce their mate. It seems cut and dry to us but you can never get in btwn the dynamic btwn a man and his wife. She has to come to that decision on her own because lord forbid she starts to second guess herself afterwards and say you talked her into divorcing her husband, it happens.
Also you don't have to know what to say she really just needs someone to vent to and to listen to her.
What a load to have dropped in your lap but you sound like a good friend. Wishing you the best.
I think it's good to give her a place to stay especially that the rule has already been set that it's just for a week but if I were her with children, I would not leave my home. She has children she has the right to the home. She should put him out and start filing legal papers.
What he did and is doing is heinous but I would never advise anyone to divorce their mate. It seems cut and dry to us but you can never get in btwn the dynamic btwn a man and his wife. She has to come to that decision on her own because lord forbid she starts to second guess herself afterwards and say you talked her into divorcing her husband, it happens.
Also you don't have to know what to say she really just needs someone to vent to and to listen to her.
What a load to have dropped in your lap but you sound like a good friend. Wishing you the best.
NAPPYCHICK86
New Member
Things are looking up for my friend. She went back to work and has the kids back at home with her. The divorce has already been filed.
awhyley
Well-Known Member
Have you read the thread yet? It's pretty cut and dry. Seriously.
Glad she has some sense of normalcy again. Thanks for the post OP.
BullGirl2010
New Member
I am truly beyond astonished at this. I hope she has one bad *** hard core attorney and takes him to the cleaners. He had the nerve to pull this B.S. in Louisiana? He's beyond a damn fool. He threatens to take her KIDS???? He is seriously stuck on stupid. He should just turn around and kiss his own *** goodbye. It's too bad she's not in one of the alienation of affections states. She could then sue his sorry *** excuse for a "boyfriend". It worked beautifully for my friend in N.C. to the tune of $3 million. This is truly one of the most disturbing situations ever. I can't imagine the pain and heartache she is experiencing. She has NOTHING to feel ashamed of. That coward should feel the shame. Someone said earlier that they would have ended up on an episode of Snapped....You'd better believe it. This is completely disturbing. It's good to know that she is getting better. She has an incredibly long road ahead of her but, with friends like you, time will heal all of her wounds. I pray for her continued healing and I pray for you for being such an amazing friend. (((((((((HUGS)))))))))
gabulldawg
Well-Known Member
NAPPYCHICK86 any other updates on your friend? How's she doing?
NAPPYCHICK86
New Member
Sorry that im just replying. She's doing great now! He wants the kids and is fighting the judges ruling.(she got full custody) Please keep her in yalls prayers.
YEAH! I told you no judge would EVER give him custody. That man is insane. I am sooooo glad she is doing better.
MichelleMyBelle
Well-Known Member
I'm so glad to hear your friend is doing better! Her soon to be ex husband just needs to take hais courtroom a s s whuppin like a man. I'm so sad for the children. It's hard enough explaining to children divorce. Then your daddy is marrying a man. Jesus take the wheel and the smitty & wesson.
Guitarhero
New Member
You are a good and honest friend. She is so confused, she truly needed you to show her what needed to be done. I don't think she could have come to the right conclusion just making her own decision without influence from others. Sometimes, people cannot see and they need to hear it in plain language. In this case, you did right in recommending she divorce him because I'm sure that internally, she knew but wasn't able to separate her feelings from any kind of intuition and/or facts. I wish her and the kids well...and I hope he moves to a gay-friendly town, like in France or some remote island. Too bad he used her as a beard. You don't involve another's life if you're not serious and you certainly don't bring kids to add greys to that beard (looking legit and wise). ha! He's all kinds of wrong.
