erplexedI'm sorry. was my post too long?
Oops... I didn't realize I'd actually submitted a half-completed answer. Here's my real response:
Control
I'd had been single for awhile I found myself trying to be in control of everything and wanting things to happen my way. My husband is very laid back, but he was also very wise in that he just sat back and let me wear myself out trying to "make it all happen." I finally got the clue that I needed to allow him to take his role as the husband (the head) as I came along side of him as his help.
The Ex-Wife
My husband has a daughter from a previous marriage. We experienced some really ugly episodes because she wasn’t as prepared to see him with someone else as she thought (even though she requested the divorce.) I HATED this woman for MANY years and my feelings for her prevented me from really being able to embrace his daughter as part of our new. In retrospect, my husband and I have agreed that HE should have dealt with his ex-wife early on in order to have a better relationship with his daughter. After all, she was just the child caught in the middle of drama.
The In-Law
It’s necessary to have some boundaries for your in-laws. My mother-in-law came to live in our city a few years ago. She and my husband have this small-town mentality that says it’s ok to show up at someone’s house unannounced. Well, to my dismay, one day I’m prancing around the living room virtually naked and I look out the window and here she comes walking up the driveway. I was HEATED! From that experience, we learned you have to (respectfully) set some boundaries for your parents.
Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff
This is probably one of the most important things. When we grasped this, our marriage soared to another level. There is SOOOOOO much stuff that just isn’t worth haggling over: who left the toilet seat up, who left the cabinets open, who left the cap off the toothpaste. Mind you, this doesn’t mean we don’t mention these things to one another, but it’s not worth arguing or attacking one another over. Marriages face enough challenges without our pet peeves chipping away at the relationship.
^^^^That cake looks so good!
Pregnancy is hard.
Don't expect happy, giggly rainbows and sunshine every day. It's ok to be in the house together and not talk. It's ok for you to read and him to watch TV. Even after marriage, your spouse is not there to entertain you.
Don't force him to communicate. That was very hard for me. When I wanted to talk, we HAD to talk RIGHT THEN! He didn't take too kindly to that. If a man tells you to leave it alone, leave it alone for awhile. He's probably trying to keep from choking you.
Well, except the choke part. 
, science, Sims 2 . Him: Computers, World of Warcraft, computers, videos games, computers...) we really didn't have anything in common. EXCEPT the essentials lie our faith, our principals, our morals, how we were going to raise our kids, how we did our finances, what our roles would be in the household (as equal as possible), all that stuff. Don't believe the school of thought that if you don't spend EVERY SINGLE WAKING MOMENT together that he's cheating or your marriage is falling apart around your ears. Simply not true. As long as you guys talk about what's importatn, still love eachother and do enjoy eachother's company, I'd say you're okay. 
All you have to do is do a search and see what kind of men should and should not get that kind of treatment
It works for me too, people wonder how I get the things I do from dh. I think doing those little three, four things gets me wayyyyyy more than I give dh
My dh is a Sag and blunt to the core. I've learned to know that his delivery is abrupt but I weed through to get the message
This is long and I could go on, but I think this is sufficient.
Let me see what I have learned from my own experiences and from other women...
No marriage is a cake walk and for those women you meet who tell you that marriage is perfect and they have the perfect husband, be leery of listening to any advice they have to offer. Usually, the perfect ones have the most problems. Before you make the final decision to get married, remember, it is not a game of playing house and then you put the dolls away. Marriage is real and be sure you are ready to take your relationship seriously. It goes beyond the beautiful gown, the guests, and wedding gifts. Once the wedding and honeymoon is over, reality sets in. Again, before you make the decision to get married, make sure it is a challenge that you are willing to act on and accept.
ALWAYS STAY PRAYED UP!!! Annoint your home and your family. Always pray for him, yourself, and your children and ask God to show you how to be a good and loving wife and ask him to show you how to love him the way that he does.
Be supportive and respectful. Men need to feel like you have their back and are willing to nudge them when necessary. Always give them compliments. For some reason, men need their egos stroked. Sometimes you feel like you are talking to one of your children when you keep saying, "Good job honey, I'm so proud of you." They need positive affirmation.
Don't put your spouse down in front of people. For example, if he cannot follow directions, don't say, "X is such an idiot and cannot follow simple directions." Even if he is clueless about doing something, just build him up and don't tear him down. When you are alone, he will thank you for it and beam like a million stars.
Giving him respect is vital. That does not mean giving him a license to abuse you. Basically, you need to give him unconditional love and confront the bad behavior. Communicate respectfully! You will get farther in your relationship when you speak in a respectful versus angry tone. If you don't, he will shut you out.
Think before you speak. Everything does not deserve an argument. So what if he left his clothes strewn across the floor. Although it is hard for us not to sweat the small stuff, soon you will realize it is worth it in the end.
Choose your listening ears carefully. No matter how bad an argument went, it does not mean you need to share it will everyone. Yeah, we all need to vent at some point or another. Always align yourself with positive energy and positive friends who will give you the best advice. Remember, misery loves company. Keep your family out of your business. Long after you make up with your spouse, your mother or father may hold what he did to you against him.
Independence One of our biggest problems as women is that we can be too independent and think we don't need a man for everything. Men like that, but at the same time, they want to feel like you need them in your life. Sometimes we have to take a step back and let him do some things for us.
Don't get too comfortable. Look your best for your man.Sometimes women think because they are married, they don't have to look their best most of the time. Yeah, we have some bad days but everyday is not your worst day. Remember, your man will see beautiful women at work, women who have taken the time to look great for the office. Then he leaves you in the morning and comes back that afternoon to see you looking unkempt. Ummmm.... Give him a great portrait to remember, because there is always someone prettier than you. No one is saying that you have to look like a model everyday you leave the house, but don't look like a dusty old wife. What you did to get him is what you need to continue doing to keep him.
If you do not learn anything else from this thread, do remember that, "The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down." Proverbs 14:1
I can agree that those are the top 3 BUT MY man likes me to look good too, i mean whats the point of sex,peace,and food if you always look like HELLThat's it. If they say anything different, they are just trying to prove they are 'real' and not shallow.
,keep your bodies and skin smooth and pretty Ladies.
I'm like a sponge, absorbing every word.
