This is long and I could go on, but I think this is sufficient.
Let me see what I have learned from my own experiences and from other women...
No marriage is a cake walk and for those women you meet who tell you that marriage is perfect and they have the perfect husband, be leery of listening to any advice they have to offer. Usually, the perfect ones have the most problems. Before you make the final decision to get married, remember, it is not a game of playing house and then you put the dolls away. Marriage is real and be sure you are ready to take your relationship seriously. It goes beyond the beautiful gown, the guests, and wedding gifts. Once the wedding and honeymoon is over, reality sets in. Again, before you make the decision to get married, make sure it is a challenge that you are willing to act on and accept.
ALWAYS STAY PRAYED UP!!! Annoint your home and your family. Always pray for him, yourself, and your children and ask God to show you how to be a good and loving wife and ask him to show you how to love him the way that he does.
Be supportive and respectful. Men need to feel like you have their back and are willing to nudge them when necessary. Always give them compliments. For some reason, men need their egos stroked. Sometimes you feel like you are talking to one of your children when you keep saying, "Good job honey, I'm so proud of you." They need positive affirmation.
Don't put your spouse down in front of people. For example, if he cannot follow directions, don't say, "X is such an idiot and cannot follow simple directions." Even if he is clueless about doing something, just build him up and don't tear him down. When you are alone, he will thank you for it and beam like a million stars.
Giving him respect is vital. That does not mean giving him a license to abuse you. Basically, you need to give him unconditional love and confront the bad behavior. Communicate respectfully! You will get farther in your relationship when you speak in a respectful versus angry tone. If you don't, he will shut you out.
Think before you speak. Everything does not deserve an argument. So what if he left his clothes strewn across the floor. Although it is hard for us not to sweat the small stuff, soon you will realize it is worth it in the end.
Choose your listening ears carefully. No matter how bad an argument went, it does not mean you need to share it will everyone. Yeah, we all need to vent at some point or another. Always align yourself with positive energy and positive friends who will give you the best advice. Remember, misery loves company. Keep your family out of your business. Long after you make up with your spouse, your mother or father may hold what he did to you against him.
Independence One of our biggest problems as women is that we can be too independent and think we don't need a man for everything. Men like that, but at the same time, they want to feel like you need them in your life. Sometimes we have to take a step back and let him do some things for us.
Don't get too comfortable. Look your best for your man.
Sometimes women think because they are married, they don't have to look their best most of the time. Yeah, we have some bad days but everyday is not your worst day. Remember, your man will see beautiful women at work, women who have taken the time to look great for the office. Then he leaves you in the morning and comes back that afternoon to see you looking unkempt. Ummmm.... Give him a great portrait to remember, because there is always someone prettier than you. No one is saying that you have to look like a model everyday you leave the house, but don't look like a dusty old wife. What you did to get him is what you need to continue doing to keep him.
If you do not learn anything else from this thread, do remember that, "The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down." Proverbs 14:1
