I don’t have pretty privilege and that sucks

[Black Ambrosia]

I didn’t watch the video. I’m not sure if it’s her or being in this thread but I find her exhausting. I’d be more inclined to watch if she was talking about something other than dating.

Definitely like the hair more now than the headband wig. Agree with the poster who said the glasses are a defense mechanism. She needs to burn them.

 

[caribeandiva]

… Agree with the poster who said the glasses are a defense mechanism. She needs to burn them.

Pronto! The glasses are her security blanket.

 

[almond eyes]

Esp. with the "mood swings" OP alluded too. Since the church had to browbeat him into this match, he clearly wasn't happy initially with his choice.



He could as least lie and say that she's attractive to him. Explicitly stating that is so disrespectful. Does he ever say that he loves her? Do they have kids? (Yes, I'm all up in da business)

They have grown into each other and as Christians accept that they will not be divorcing. No they don't and can't have kids.

Best,
Almond Eyes

 

[kupenda]

I don’t think I could be her friend. Her reality may be true for her and I get that. She seems pretty smart. Clearly has done a lot of introspection. But surprisingly I don’t think the men are the issue. I think she has a presence that is easy to ignore. When I make the decision to be invisible, it usually happens. I can shop at target in peace. When I decide to be radiant, I get attention from people regardless of their sex or age. Her presence needs a shift. She also needs to not hang out with gorgeous friends if she’s on the prowl. They’re unintentionally blocking. The faces she chooses to make and use as thumbnail photos for her videos are an odd choice. If I couldn’t get a pic of me looking awesome, I’d choose a flower or some cutesy background instead lol. This whole “accept me as I am” movement is both fascinating and tragic. You don’t have to dress cute or wear makeup, workout, have good weave, etc. But you don’t get to complain about the attention you didn’t get while looking like you’re heading to the do it yourself car wash. She also needs heels (at least two inches but three is ideal. Kitten heels are for jazzy aunties and grannies that still got it, or twelve years olds trying to be grown). Most women do as far as I’m concerned. They add a layer of vavavoom that you can’t usually get in flats.
I truly think she’s split down the middle when it comes to inner work vs outer work. The exterior needs to be spruced up, the interior needs to be pulled out of whatever self help/introspective book it’s currently obsessing over. She has to get out there and live. Analyzing every situation to its minutia is masculine and exhausting. Anti-anxiety meds may help too

 

[caribeandiva]

But you don’t get to complain about the attention you didn’t get while looking like you’re heading to the do it yourself car wash.

Not the do it yourself car wash!!

 

[MissNina]

The man-pretty vs. women-pretty thing is valid Bc each sex is biologically wired to see & feel things differently. Many women are deemed attractive no matter the gaze, tho, and this girl just ain’t it.

I think it was @kupenda who said she was easy to miss or be invisible, which is actually WILD Bc sis has a bawdy. I think subconsciously she wants it to be that way, due to insecurity or whatever else have you. But she is super exhausting, I haven’t watched another video from her minus the original Bc I just cannot

I’ve always been considered pretty across the board, so I can’t really relate to her feeling of general invisibility. That being said, I have many friends even prettier than I - like literal models/gorgeous/are paid for their beauty - and you can still feel “not as pretty as” even with some attention & knowledge that you’re really pretty to most ppl in the room.

What I’m saying is that there’s levels to this and most of it is psychological. Something tells me she would feel the same way about herself even if she got the attention/visibility she wanted. There will always be someone prettier & more privileged than you if you walk into enough rooms. Plus, getting attention Bc you’re pretty privileged is one thing and holding it is another.

 

[kupenda]

The man-pretty vs. women-pretty thing is valid Bc each sex is biologically wired to see & feel things differently. Many women are deemed attractive no matter the gaze, tho, and this girl just ain’t it.

I think it was @kupenda who said she was easy to miss or be invisible, which is actually WILD Bc sis has a bawdy.

I got through two videos and I’m tired of her lol. And yes, she’s invisible because she’s radiating that energy.

I’ve always been considered pretty across the board, so I can’t really relate to her feeling of general invisibility. That being said, I have many friends even prettier than I - like literal models/gorgeous/are paid for their beauty - and you can still feel “not as pretty as” even with some attention & knowledge that you’re really pretty to most ppl in the room.

What I’m saying is that there’s levels to this and most of it is psychological. Something tells me she would feel the same way about herself even if she got the attention/visibility she wanted. There will always be someone prettier & more privileged than you if you walk into enough rooms. Plus, getting attention Bc you’re pretty privileged is one thing and holding it is another.

 

[frizzy]

She might not actually want "help". This might be a YT schtick for clicks. I'm sure there are many that relate to her dilemma.

 

[Evolving78]

She might not actually want "help". This might be a YT schtick for clicks. I'm sure there are many that relate to her dilemma.

Right a troll.

 

[OmbreLune]

Yeah... it seems like the first video she was just getting feelings off her chest; like not really complaining or asking for advice, just acknowledging where (she believed) she was in life. Now I think she's just keeps talking about it over and over because it is what gets her views. I did like hearing her perspective but it's not resonating with me so I'm gonna have to mute her videos or something this too much

 

[cocosweet]

She might not actually want "help". This might be a YT schtick for clicks. I'm sure there are many that relate to her dilemma.

This actually hadn't occurred to me.

Sings..."don't save her, she don't wanna be saved."

 

[Evolving78]

This actually hadn't occurred to me.

Sings..."don't save her, she don't wanna be saved."

I was singing the same thing! Lol

 

[caribeandiva]

Ok I am convinced home girl is a lurker here. She ditched the glasses!!

 

[caribeandiva]

This actually hadn't occurred to me.

Sings..."don't save her, she don't wanna be saved."

I was singing the same thing! Lol

I thought I was singing the same song too until I realized I was singing the other song by Ty Dollar sign: she wanna be saved. I ain’t gon’ save her.

 

[caribeandiva]

Started from the bottom now we here:

 

[Evolving78]

……

 

[awhyley]

I thought I was singing the same song too until I realized I was singing the other song by Ty Dollar sign: she wanna be saved. I ain’t gon’ save her.

Chile, yall had me listening to this and Project Pat all last night.

 

[NijaG]

Yes, they are still married. Their church spoke to and convinced him. He found her to be dependable, loyal and could get things done just not attractive in the face for him. A nice full bosom helped her case too. Whenever he acts cold which is often, she puts it down to his mood swings. Now, he seems like the type of man that even if a woman was a stunner he would still find a problem.

Best,
Almond Eyes

Honestly…. I’d rather be single. Do they have kids?

I’m sure he treats her “well” and does his “duty and obligation” as a husband. However, that occasional coldness/moodiness is something I’ve seen in these types of marriages. The wife is always left feeling off-balance in the rlsp, but can’t quiet place why the feel that way.

 

[NijaG]

Honestly…. I’d rather be single. Do they have kids?

I’m sure he treats her “well” and does his “duty and obligation” as a husband. However, that occasional coldness/moodiness is something I’ve seen in these types of marriages. The wife is always left feeling off-balance in the rlsp, but can’t quiet place why the feel that way.

ETA: Just read that they don’t have kids and won’t divorce due to Christian belief.

 

[HappyAtLast]

I don’t think I could be her friend. Her reality may be true for her and I get that. She seems pretty smart. Clearly has done a lot of introspection. But surprisingly I don’t think the men are the issue. I think she has a presence that is easy to ignore. When I make the decision to be invisible, it usually happens. I can shop at target in peace. When I decide to be radiant, I get attention from people regardless of their sex or age. Her presence needs a shift. She also needs to not hang out with gorgeous friends if she’s on the prowl. They’re unintentionally blocking. The faces she chooses to make and use as thumbnail photos for her videos are an odd choice. If I couldn’t get a pic of me looking awesome, I’d choose a flower or some cutesy background instead lol. This whole “accept me as I am” movement is both fascinating and tragic. You don’t have to dress cute or wear makeup, workout, have good weave, etc. But you don’t get to complain about the attention you didn’t get while looking like you’re heading to the do it yourself car wash. She also needs heels (at least two inches but three is ideal. Kitten heels are for jazzy aunties and grannies that still got it, or twelve years olds trying to be grown). Most women do as far as I’m concerned. They add a layer of vavavoom that you can’t usually get in flats.
I truly think she’s split down the middle when it comes to inner work vs outer work. The exterior needs to be spruced up, the interior needs to be pulled out of whatever self help/introspective book it’s currently obsessing over. She has to get out there and live. Analyzing every situation to its minutia is masculine and exhausting. Anti-anxiety meds may help too

Agreed. And er thumbnails made me pause too. I mean why present yourself to the world like that... then complain you're not getting the attention you want?

 

[kupenda]

Agreed. And er thumbnails made me pause too. I mean why present yourself to the world like that... then complain you're not getting the attention you want?

EXACTLY! She’s too old to not see the issue with that. I wonder if she says degrading things about herself in conversation unprovoked.

 

[Evolving78]

EXACTLY! She’s too old to not see the issue with that. I wonder if she says degrading things about herself in conversation unprovoked.

Yeah I don’t do that vulnerable/victim crap. She comes off very cerebral and arrogant.

 

[almond eyes]

Honestly…. I’d rather be single. Do they have kids?

I’m sure he treats her “well” and does his “duty and obligation” as a husband. However, that occasional coldness/moodiness is something I’ve seen in these types of marriages. The wife is always left feeling off-balance in the rlsp, but can’t quiet place why the feel that way.

I have been in a relationship like that and I ran far. I will not have a man put his pathologies and toxic personality onto me. However, for some women being Mrs is a status despite what is happening behind closed doors.

Best,
Almond Eyes

 

[caribeandiva]

New look y’all!! I like it! What do y’all think?

 

[Black Ambrosia]

New look y’all!! I like it! What do y’all think?

I like it too. She needs a more relaxed facial expression though but I’ll take it. She looks like she knows whoever she’s talking to is lying.

 

[LivingInPeace]

New look y’all!! I like it! What do y’all think?

I watched this video today. I can relate to a lot of what she talked about.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

New look y’all!! I like it! What do y’all think?

Long straight hair took a smooth 5+ years off her face

 

[cocosweet]

Guess who's back...
back again...
Glasses back....
Tell a friend...

 

[HappyAtLast]

Guess who's back...
back again...
Glasses back....
Tell a friend...

Glasses def still need a revision. At least the hair color is really nice on her.

 

[naturalgyrl5199]

I don’t think I could be her friend. Her reality may be true for her and I get that. She seems pretty smart. Clearly has done a lot of introspection. But surprisingly I don’t think the men are the issue. I think she has a presence that is easy to ignore. When I make the decision to be invisible, it usually happens. I can shop at target in peace. When I decide to be radiant, I get attention from people regardless of their sex or age. Her presence needs a shift. She also needs to not hang out with gorgeous friends if she’s on the prowl. They’re unintentionally blocking. The faces she chooses to make and use as thumbnail photos for her videos are an odd choice. If I couldn’t get a pic of me looking awesome, I’d choose a flower or some cutesy background instead lol. This whole “accept me as I am” movement is both fascinating and tragic. You don’t have to dress cute or wear makeup, workout, have good weave, etc. But you don’t get to complain about the attention you didn’t get while looking like you’re heading to the do it yourself car wash. She also needs heels (at least two inches but three is ideal. Kitten heels are for jazzy aunties and grannies that still got it, or twelve years olds trying to be grown). Most women do as far as I’m concerned. They add a layer of vavavoom that you can’t usually get in flats.
I truly think she’s split down the middle when it comes to inner work vs outer work. The exterior needs to be spruced up, the interior needs to be pulled out of whatever self help/introspective book it’s currently obsessing over. She has to get out there and live. Analyzing every situation to its minutia is masculine and exhausting. Anti-anxiety meds may help too

The bolded will free her!