carolinetwin
Member
I’m just curious as I’ve been surprised by some members saying they don’t find black men attractive. To me, it’s like saying you don’t find yourself attractive.
Do you not date black men?
- Thread starter carolinetwin
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kmn1980
Emoticons don't affect me
Livingmylifetothefullest
Well-Known Member
I don't and it's only because they don't approach me. They'll stare at me but won't speak to me.
SND411
A True Soldier Never Dies
I personally believe that in the end we are all human beings. Perhaps our preferences will be a little bit skewed toward who you have grown up with/your inherent traits. But at the end of the day, I think most people find other human beings attractive regardless of ethnicity.
Why can't people just find certain individuals attractive without commenting on a whole race?
Why can't people just find certain individuals attractive without commenting on a whole race?
carolinetwin
Member
How is it you've never dated a black man? Is it due to where you live, social circles?
carolinetwin
Member
I'm only asking out of curiosity. I grew up in a predominately white neighbourhood, and whilst I do find some white men attractive, I couldn't ever say that I don't find black men attractive. To suggest that they are unattractive as I've seen some members do here, smacks of self loathing IN MY OPINION.
Preference is one thing, exclusivity in that preference is another thing entirely
HennaRo
Well-Known Member
My social circles have always been I'm the one black chick. I grew up at the time in a very white area but now it's pretty blended. Most of time even until college I was maybe 1 of 3 if that black people in a class. I knew nothing of sticking to your own kind(as some say) and just befriended whomever would talk to me.
NAPPYCHICK86
New Member
black men are yummy
Matter of fact my husband is black. I on the other hand couldnt picture myself with a white man... not bc of color it all just boils down to preference. 
Matter of fact my husband is black. I on the other hand couldnt picture myself with a white man... not bc of color it all just boils down to preference. Just happened that way. I was a tomboy, so I keep seeing black males as more "brotherly" rather than as just men. I've been attracted to some black men, but it just seems to really click with white men. Whereas the black men I find attractive seem to ignore my existence. I'm not going to cry over not having a good black man, or go for someone that I don't find attractive just to "stay black." I'm going to go where there's a connection only.
It just seems ironic that it happens more with white men than with black.
It just seems ironic that it happens more with white men than with black.
HennaRo
Well-Known Member
Now I'm just curious here because a lot of black people say that because I am not with nor have ever dated a black man then that means I am self hating. Does it mean the same thing when I say that my husband has never dated a white woman, doesn't find them attractive at all, then he's self hating too? It really is just a question not trying to get all snippety!
It doens't help at all that we live in the south now...the stare's, the back talk, up north where he's from it's almost perfectly fine.
It doens't help at all that we live in the south now...the stare's, the back talk, up north where he's from it's almost perfectly fine.
Very interesting. Hubby is black, but I think this topic is interesting. I said if I ever was in the dating scene and now that I am older, what would be more important to me would be who treats me right, who loves me unconditionally, who I can relate to, and other things. 'He gotta be black' would be a little less of my concerns.
Now I relate to black men more, due to our racial history and such, but that doesn't mean other men of various cultures couldn't appreaciate black women just as well. But interesting question
.
Now I relate to black men more, due to our racial history and such, but that doesn't mean other men of various cultures couldn't appreaciate black women just as well. But interesting question
.
MarieB
Well-Known Member
I dated whoever when I was single, but I was approached most often by white men. Should I find myself single again, I would happily continue to date any man who treated me with respect, made me laugh, loved me for me, etc. That's what I have now, and I will never settle for less again. It's not about the color, it's about the man.
song_of_serenity
Well-Known Member
Lawd...
I've honestly never heard someone willfully say "I would NEVER date a black man" on here vs preference. Well, maybe I have.
I get approached by white guys all the time as well as black. My ex was white.
I've honestly never heard someone willfully say "I would NEVER date a black man" on here vs preference. Well, maybe I have.
I get approached by white guys all the time as well as black. My ex was white.
NAPPYCHICK86
New Member
Whimsy
Well-Known Member
I'm a colorblind dater.
I don't remember reading anyone here saying they don't date black men cuz they don't find them attractive, but i'm sure some have and I've just missed it.
I usually read the 'oh i dont date black men cuz they suck for this or that reason..." threads, but never cuz they're not attractive.
I get that everyone has preferences, so whatevs. they'll do them and i'll do me.
I don't remember reading anyone here saying they don't date black men cuz they don't find them attractive, but i'm sure some have and I've just missed it.
I usually read the 'oh i dont date black men cuz they suck for this or that reason..." threads, but never cuz they're not attractive.
I get that everyone has preferences, so whatevs. they'll do them and i'll do me.
Whimsy
Well-Known Member
Oh my god nappychick that lil man in your siggie is too cute. i don't know how i missed that precious lil face before. he's ADORABLE!!!!I'll bring beer
theEclectanista
New Member
I have only dated black men, however I am thinking about opening myself up to other races due to the successful black woman to male ratio that basically makes me feel like there's no hope.
I have to disagree with the bold.. I'm attracted to dark skin black men and I'm no where near dark skin..
I know white women that aren't attracted to white men and vice versa.
I don't think not liking someone of your own race has anything to with projection
ScorpioBeauty09
Well-Known Member
Physically I'm attracted to all races of men pretty equally but I feel more of an emotional/personality connection with non-black men. Of course I could meet a black guy tomorrow who could totally change that. Everyone has their preferences but I just try to be open.
qchelle
Well-Known Member
Renewed1
Well-Known Member
IMHO
With all due respect I really don't understand how you came to that conclusion. I do not find black men attractive so I do not find myself attractive?? But I am not a black man.
I agree with this statement. I immediately thought the samething.
Ignore those people. You are not self-hating for having a preference. I prefer white men over black men...and I give any black dudes that try to speak to me....the poo poo face.
There are black men who prefer white women over black women. Are they self-hating? NOPE!!! So why shouldn't a black woman have her pick.
People need to stop over analyzing the whole interracial relationship thing. Date who you prefer!!!!
Agreed!
LovelyNaps26
Well-Known Member
Do you not prefer black men because you don't find them physically attractive or because you think that socially you connect more with white men?
(i.e. would you still make the poo face at Boris, Morris or Idris or only at Jayqwan, Tyrone or Booshaka from around the way?)
Uhh... there have been too many discussions on the self loathing slave mentality of black men who have internalized the idealization of white femininity to count, so many would say black men who only date white women are self loathing.
I do give the side eye to brothers who say they can only date white women because they don't find black women attractive AND have a mother, aunts and sisters whom they claim to be close to. I don't get that.
erplexed
GaiasDaughter24
New Member
I've always been approached by white men. My DH was the first black guy I dated. He's biracial.The black men I knew didn't like me like that mainly because we were so different as in music, interests, etc. They made fun of me. I find white men more physically attractive as well.
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