Calling in the One Challenge

[NinasLongAmbition]

I'm going to commit to focusing and finishing this book this month.

 

[tigerrose]

Happy New Year ladies!
I hope 2015 is off to a great start for all of you.

I am practically starting over with this course because I haven't been
doing any of the lessons since the holidays started. I got off track because
I have been so busy with other areas of my life.

I needed to start over anyway because I really needed a clean slate
as far as having my heart and mind open to receiving the man who is the One for me.
I had been having a hard time letting go of who I expected him to be or
hoped he would be.

This time I decided to start the new year by completing this course
along with a fast. I really need clarity and discernment as I prepare
myself to become a wife. This will help me to not waste anymore precious
time on the wrong men, and get rid of them faster once I know they are
not the One for me.

I'm still praying that I will be married in 2015.
I'm also praying that all of you will call in the One for you in 2015 too!

 

[cutiebe2]

I really need to start this ASAP. I have the book.

Sometimes my love life gets me down so much I feel depressed. I've never had a serious relationship and I dont see anything wrong with me. I just dont get it.

 

[jprayze]

I really need to start this ASAP. I have the book. Sometimes my love life gets me down so much I feel depressed. I've never had a serious relationship and I dont see anything wrong with me. I just dont get it.

Nothing is wrong. You deserve love and you will receive it. Take the first step and open that book!

 

[jprayze]

Happy New Year ladies! I hope 2015 is off to a great start for all of you. I am practically starting over with this course because I haven't been doing any of the lessons since the holidays started. I got off track because I have been so busy with other areas of my life. I needed to start over anyway because I really needed a clean slate as far as having my heart and mind open to receiving the man who is the One for me. I had been having a hard time letting go of who I expected him to be or hoped he would be. This time I decided to start the new year by completing this course along with a fast. I really need clarity and discernment as I prepare myself to become a wife. This will help me to not waste anymore precious time on the wrong men, and get rid of them faster once I know they are not the One for me. I'm still praying that I will be married in 2015. I'm also praying that all of you will call in the One for you in 2015 too!

I will be fasting as well!

 

[Xerxes]

I have been wrestling with myself over whether to say anything in this thread about this book, but if I can encourage one other person, I feel that my remarks may be worthwhile.

This book works for those who do the work and who truly start to believe that they are lovable and begin to both give and receive love in the way the author specifies.

I had limited expectations when I bought this book after seeing this thread, but it literally caused me to reevaluate how I deal with men and identify my own personal issues that prevented me from experiencing the proper man for me.

The man I am currently dating, I would have brushed off before this book and was going to, but I now see how much of a blessing he is and I pray that we work out.

Timescale, I got this book a little before Thanksgiving at the same time I connected online to my bf and each day we grow closer. But it's a commitment and my biggest problem has always been finding time for others and I'm constantly learning how to compromise to give "us" the time to grow.

I must say the book and the time I am putting into my relationship is worth it.

I am immensely happy and cannot believe that I am falling in love. We communicate well and he's nothing I was looking for on the surface, but exceeds every expectation you can name.

When you really open up to love, start loving others without expecting something in return, love comes back and knocks you over.

I probably won't reply to any comments, but should I marry him, I'll post a thread or repost in this thread.

Seriously, I pray you all find the love you deserve and give the love you are capable of giving to others. Be encouraged! ((hugs and kisses))

 

[sweetvi]

Happy New Year ladies!
I hope 2015 is off to a great start for all of you.

I am practically starting over with this course because I haven't been
doing any of the lessons since the holidays started. I got off track because
I have been so busy with other areas of my life.

I needed to start over anyway because I really needed a clean slate
as far as having my heart and mind open to receiving the man who is the One for me.
I had been having a hard time letting go of who I expected him to be or
hoped he would be.

This time I decided to start the new year by completing this course
along with a fast. I really need clarity and discernment as I prepare
myself to become a wife. This will help me to not waste anymore precious
time on the wrong men, and get rid of them faster once I know they are
not the One for me.

I'm still praying that I will be married in 2015.
I'm also praying that all of you will call in the One for you in 2015 too!

tigerrose

Thank you Tigerrose. I need to restart the book from the beginning next month. This will be my year!

 

[metro_qt]

I have been wrestling with myself over whether to say anything in this thread about this book, but if I can encourage one other person, I feel that my remarks may be worthwhile.

This book works for those who do the work and who truly start to believe that they are lovable and begin to both give and receive love in the way the author specifies.

I had limited expectations when I bought this book after seeing this thread, but it literally caused me to reevaluate how I deal with men and identify my own personal issues that prevented me from experiencing the proper man for me.

The man I am currently dating, I would have brushed off before this book and was going to, but I now see how much of a blessing he is and I pray that we work out.

Timescale, I got this book a little before Thanksgiving at the same time I connected online to my bf and each day we grow closer. But it's a commitment and my biggest problem has always been finding time for others and I'm constantly learning how to compromise to give "us" the time to grow.

I must say the book and the time I am putting into my relationship is worth it.

I am immensely happy and cannot believe that I am falling in love. We communicate well and he's nothing I was looking for on the surface, but exceeds every expectation you can name.

When you really open up to love, start loving others without expecting something in return, love comes back and knocks you over.

I probably won't reply to any comments, but should I marry him, I'll post a thread or repost in this thread.

Seriously, I pray you all find the love you deserve and give the love you are capable of giving to others. Be encouraged! ((hugs and kisses))

I'm going to say exactly the same thing as you...
I started the book at the same time I met my now boyfriend.
I was already a few lessons in when I went on my first date with him.

I commited to finishing the book this time and going through all the lessons thoroughly. I even said that I would redo certain chapters in this book to get the full benefits. (I finished it in december)

I don't know where this relationship will lead us,but it's the best one I've had yet....

If you see me married to him in a couple of years, thank this book!
(And the hard work i did)

 

[tigerrose]

tigerrose

Thank you Tigerrose. I need to restart the book from the beginning next month. This will be my year!

sweetvi You are restarting in the month of love
so your efforts may be magnified!
I'm praying that 2015 will be our year for receiving
a love that endures forever!

 

[Nomadiclady]

Hi Ladies, thank you for sharing your updates!

 

[Nomadiclady]

oops
10 char

 

[hopeful]

Hey ladies, I couldn't resist and purchased the book too. I've been married 25+ years and I am finding this book to be helpful. Some of the lessons are really hard and require a very high level of maturity. I can see why so many had a hard time getting through it the first time they tried. I think this quote sums up why getting and keeping love can be so difficult: "Love will always require of us more than we initially intended to give, for it will take no less than everything we've got." Going in most of us can't imagine the sacrifices we must make or how much we are asking of another human being. I like how she discusses that getting what we want is a matter of subtraction, not addition. We often say I want someone to add to whatever it is we bring or offer. It does not come natural to us to imagine that we will have to give so much in order to get what we want. It is painful to die unto ourselves, to slice away pieces of us that we have become so comfortable with. Anyway, I just wanted to wish all of you the best of luck and encourage you to persist and have faith that "the one" for you does exist.

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

Hey ladies!!!

It's been a LONNNG time since I've posted here and in the group thread, but I'm going to try to keep up with it.

I've been STUCK on Week #3 for a month... , and PART of that is because I've been so busy and stressed with other things (looking for a new job, have to look for a new place to live--I'm moving out since my roommate is getting married in a few months ), but PART of it has also been because I've just become kind of cynical, resentful and down on myself again. Like, will I EVER find love??

It's sad, I know.... But sometimes I really do wonder. Some things have happened over the past couple of months that have really taken away my "shine", and I'm feeling worse than I did BEFORE I started the book, so I HAVE to get back to reading the book and doing the exercises. I feel like I've regressed somewhat. erplexed I HAVE to finish Week #3! That's my goal for this month. FINISH WEEK #3! THEN hopefully I can move on and find my happiness again.

This book really is powerful , and I"m so happy to see that the book is working for so many of us! I'm NOT going to give up... I think I just have so much going on right now in my life, that it was getting really hard for me to keep up with everything. But I think I'll do another exercise tonight and tomorrow night, and see how it goes.

Thanks for letting me vent. I just need some motivation that's all. Maybe week 3 is bringing up too many emotional things for me and I can't push through it all yet. Maybe I'm just scared? Idk...all I know is that right now how I feel about men is not the most "happy" feeling at the moment lol... ,and I know I have to get over those feelings of resentment if I want to find someone.

I need to get back to reading this book and doing the exercises.... If anyone experienced this "feeling" that I'm going through while reading this book, please chime in and let me know how you were able to push pass through this! I feel like I'm hitting a roadblock.

 

[hopeful]

I kind of skimmed through the entire book over the weekend. Afterwards I felt depressed and worse as well. To me this book is like years of therapy, spiritual guidance, and lots of different kinds of advice. IMO seven weeks is deceptive. I don't see how most people could do it. The info is just too dense and psychologically intense/painful IMO. If you are stuck I think you should move forward and come back to that section.

 

[InsertCleverNameHere]

I had the flu for almost 3 wks so this wasn't a priority. I'm ready to get back to it tho.

 

[CurlyMoo]

I started the book again but then a co-worker wanted her investment book back so I had to focus on finishing that book. I really need to focus on managing my money right now. So having said that it looks like I am not ready to deal with my love life at the moment.

Good luck to you all.

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

I kind of skimmed through the entire book over the weekend. Afterwards I felt depressed and worse as well. To me this book is like years of therapy, spiritual guidance, and lots of different kinds of advice. IMO seven weeks is deceptive. I don't see how most people could do it. The info is just too dense and psychologically intense/painful IMO. If you are stuck I think you should move forward and come back to that section.

@hopeful
YES!!!! That's exactly how I feel!!!

I'm SO glad I'm not the only one who is feeling this way. Now I don't feel so crazy lol!

Like, I didn't expect the course to be easy, but if you take a break from it, it can depress you and you won't want to go back to it lol...

But I'm definitely going to STICK with it, but I just need to take a "break" right now. It's VERY intense...not only emotionally, but also with the amount of work (and WRITING! ) involved. I just don't have enough time during the day when I come home in the evenings to do an hour or two of work. It's like having homework after you've worked all day and fought traffic back home.

I AM going to finish it though and go at my own leisure pace, but it IS very intense, and almost like therapy sessions, so it's going to really take a lot of time, dedication, and patience. erplexed It's a really good book though.

Maybe you're right Hopeful, maybe I need to just skip some of the exercises and come back to Week 3 at a later date. BUT, I feel like I can't really PROGRESS with Weeks 4 and beyond if I haven't gone through the "letting go ceremony" at the end of Week 3. I feel like Week 3 is PIVOTAL in order to really take in Week 4 and the weeks following after. I'm torn.

I started the book again but then a co-worker wanted her investment book back so I had to focus on finishing that book. I really need to focus on managing my money right now. So having said that it looks like I am not ready to deal with my love life at the moment.

Good luck to you all.

CurlyMoo
Girl who are you telling?? I think that's where I'm at too right now. Right now I just have a LOT of OTHER more important things to deal with, and I'm just not really feeling like dealing with the love life right now. Maybe when I find a better-paying job closer to home and find a stable place lined up to live come March I'll be feeling a lot better. But for right now?? I'm just feeling really stressed, and feeling like CITO may need to take a back seat right now.

ETA: Btw, the guy in your siggy is HOTTT!!! Idk who he is, but he's nice-looking.

 

[CurlyMoo]

@hopeful
YES!!!! That's exactly how I feel!!!

I'm SO glad I'm not the only one who is feeling this way. Now I don't feel so crazy lol!

Like, I didn't expect the course to be easy, but if you take a break from it, it can depress you and you won't want to go back to it lol...

But I'm definitely going to STICK with it, but I just need to take a "break" right now. It's VERY intense...not only emotionally, but also with the amount of work (and WRITING! ) involved. I just don't have enough time during the day when I come home in the evenings to do an hour or two of work. It's like having homework after you've worked all day and fought traffic back home.

I AM going to finish it though and go at my own leisure pace, but it IS very intense, and almost like therapy sessions, so it's going to really take a lot of time, dedication, and patience. erplexed It's a really good book though.

Maybe you're right Hopeful, maybe I need to just skip some of the exercises and come back to Week 3 at a later date. BUT, I feel like I can't really PROGRESS with Weeks 4 and beyond if I haven't gone through the "letting go ceremony" at the end of Week 3. I feel like Week 3 is PIVOTAL in order to really take in Week 4 and the weeks following after. I'm torn.


@CurlyMoo
Girl who are you telling?? I think that's where I'm at too right now. Right now I just have a LOT of OTHER more important things to deal with, and I'm just not really feeling like dealing with the love life right now. Maybe when I find a better-paying job closer to home and find a stable place lined up to live come March I'll be feeling a lot better. But for right now?? I'm just feeling really stressed, and feeling like CITO may need to take a back seat right now.

ETA: Btw, the guy in your siggy is HOTTT!!! Idk who he is, but he's nice-looking.

Yes, I have an active profile on match.com and some interesting guys are showing interest. More interesting than POF. I am trying to meet guys but then there is all of this other stuff to deal with.

The question is, can I deal with the other stuff and find the right guy for me? Am I having cold feet or am I in over my head? UGH! The book did say if you find yourself stuck at some point you are not ready. Just take a break and come back to it later.

Oh and......

Godfrey Gao & 6'4"

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

Yes, I have an active profile on match.com and some interesting guys are showing interest. More interesting than POF. I am trying to meet guys but then there is all of this other stuff to deal with.

The question is, can I deal with the other stuff and find the right guy for me? Am I having cold feet or am I in over my head? UGH! The book did say if you find yourself stuck at some point you are not ready. Just take a break and come back to it later.

Oh and......

Godfrey Gao & 6'4"

Yea I wonder that myself! I ask myself all of those questions.

Well, maybe I DO need to take a bit of a break right now.... See the thing is, I WANT to continue READING the book (Because I find it fascinating, positive, and empowering ), but I just don't really want to do the exercises... I think they are time-consuming lol. It feels like WORK to me. And I know some people will say: "Well, just read the book and come BACK to doing the exercises"... But I know myself...if I read the book and DON'T do the exercises in tandem, I will NOT do them lol. I KNOW myself.

So I'm basically preventing myself from reading the book any further unless I'm completely ready and devoted to doing the exercises at the end of each chapter. Maybe that's a crazy way to do things, but I know myself. Plus, it's a LOT easier (imo) to do the exercises while the chapter is still fresh in your mind.


Btw, your siggy cutie is 6'4?? WOW! That's taller than most....lol

 

[CurlyMoo]

Yea I wonder that myself! I ask myself all of those questions.

Well, maybe I DO need to take a bit of a break right now.... See the thing is, I WANT to continue READING the book (Because I find it fascinating, positive, and empowering ), but I just don't really want to do the exercises... I think they are time-consuming lol. It feels like WORK to me. And I know some people will say: "Well, just read the book and come BACK to doing the exercises"... But I know myself...if I read the book and DON'T do the exercises in tandem, I will NOT do them lol. I KNOW myself.

So I'm basically preventing myself from reading the book any further unless I'm completely ready and devoted to doing the exercises at the end of each chapter. Maybe that's a crazy way to do things, but I know myself. Plus, it's a LOT easier (imo) to do the exercises while the chapter is still fresh in your mind.


Btw, your siggy cutie is 6'4?? WOW! That's taller than most....lol

You know your patterns. I was at work reading this book and did some of the exercises in a chair. I was actually planning to read through it and come back and do the exercises after reading. It's about self discipline which is something I have been working on.

But prioritizing is also important. I say if it's difficult fitting this book into your life right now then come back to it instead of forcing it. That's negative energy. And this book is about positive energy. Which is what I REALLY need right now. But my finances are higher on the list because it's stressing me out. If I can at least get back in the right direction with my finances I can then feel relaxed enough to accept what this book has to offer.

Gao is 6'4, born in Taiwan and raised in Canada.
I suspect that there are a variety of heights in Asia.
Imagine walking into a room with this tall drink of delicious on your arm.

 

[sgold04]

I'm definitely stuck. I stopped for a bit after my last situation ended, I wanted to be a little more emotionally sound, but when I picked it back up, all those emotions flooded back. I want to uproot this bitterness and pain, but I can't do it without facing it head on, and I don't want to face it, or rather, FEEL it. My normal tactic is to forget they exist, and try to erase them from my memory. I'm planning a move to a different city by Labor Day, but I really wish I could move now, it expedites my forgetting process.

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

You know your patterns. I was at work reading this book and did some of the exercises in a chair. I was actually planning to read through it and come back and do the exercises after reading. It's about self discipline which is something I have been working on.

But prioritizing is also important. I say if it's difficult fitting this book into your life right now then come back to it instead of forcing it. That's negative energy. And this book is about positive energy. Which is what I REALLY need right now. But my finances are higher on the list because it's stressing me out. If I can at least get back in the right direction with my finances I can then feel relaxed enough to accept what this book has to offer.

Gao is 6'4, born in Taiwan and raised in Canada.
I suspect that there are a variety of heights in Asia.
Imagine walking into a room with this tall drink of delicious on your arm.

Yes, exactly. You're so right. If you're trying to FORCE something to happen, that's negative energy. I want to be in a positive place while I read this book and do the exercises.

I'm feeling a LOT better today than I was this past week, so that's an improvement I guess lol.

I think you're right, once we get our more pressing issues in place, THEN we will probably find it easier to go through the book and do the exercises and stick with them. I know for me personally, once I get my job situation cleared up (I need a job closer to home ), and I figure out what my living situation will be in the next few months, I will feel MUCH better. I think sometimes stress can make you put smaller, more trivial things to the back burner, and then once everything is cleared up you can come back to your love life.

I think for me it was just hard to find the time to do the reading AND the exercises after work. But I will definitely find SOME time this week to at least finish one of the exercises this week. Even if I were doing just ONE exercise a week, that would be an improvement lol.

PS--Yes, he is a tall drink of water lol...

 

[caribeandiva]

CurlyMoo and Crystalicequeen123 I've loved Godfrey Gao since I saw him in the Chinese movie: "All about women". Hilarious film!!

If you're both getting stuck, there's nothing wrong with taking a break from this program. That doesn't make you a failure or anything like that. Like someone up thread mentioned, this book is yeeaarrsss of therapy, spiritual search and intense self reflection crammed into 7 weeks! Of course it's intense! Go easy on yourselves. Like you said, you have other priorities right now. Release the guilt and treat yourselves with kid gloves. You need it right now. You're going through a lot. Btw i also answered you in the private group.

 

[Crystalicequeen123]

@CurlyMoo and @Crystalicequeen123 I've loved Godfrey Gao since I saw him in the Chinese movie: "All about women". Hilarious film!!

If you're both getting stuck, there's nothing wrong with taking a break from this program. That doesn't make you a failure or anything like that. Like someone up thread mentioned, this book is yeeaarrsss of therapy, spiritual search and intense self reflection crammed into 7 weeks! Of course it's intense! Go easy on yourselves. Like you said, you have other priorities right now. Release the guilt and treat yourselves with kid gloves. You need it right now. You're going through a lot. Btw i also answered you in the private group.

caribeandiva Thanks girl. I responded back on the Group Thread.

I'm glad that "getting stuck" is normal and not something to be ashamed of. I think at first I was feeling kind of guilty, or sort of like a failure because I couldn't go at a fast pace, and I just wasn't feeling up to doing some of the exercises on some days. But now I know it's better to just go at your own speed and comfort level.

I DO need to get some priorities in order first before I can FULLY immerse myself yet again.


PS--I've never heard of this guy Godfrey Gao! Is he a model? An actor? I may have to check him out. :scratchch

 

[StLucianSweetie]

I got my ebook copy last night, so looking forward to joining in on conversations.

 

[caribeandiva]

I officially finished the course today! That was fast! I'm so glad I took part in this challenge. I honestly wouldn't have finished it if it wasn't for the private group. Checking in daily and keeping in touch with the other ladies kept me on track. I had so many aha moments while reading this book! I can actually see all the blocks I had to love and how to move past them. I'm a lot more loving and open to love in general. I can also identify when I'm feeling anxious and soothe myself. I had a lot of anxiety about love and all that it entails! Now I can calm myself and stop running away whenever something looks promising. That alone was worth the entire course to me.

 

[tigerrose]

hopeful thanks for sharing that you have been married for over
25 years! WOW! You gave me hope that it is possible to keep
"the one" you have called in for "life".

One of my concerns about marriage is that I will be
trusting my husband with "my life". That is why it is so
important for me to have the discernment to choose
the right one for me. I don't care how long it takes
because the right one will be well worth it.

My last relationship taught me to be able to see into
a man's soul and still love and accept him for who he
really was. My husband must be able to accept and love
me for who I really am and vice versa. We truly must be
able to love each other even during the worst of times...
not just the best of times. That is a sacrifice that will force us
both to grow in so many ways.

But I know now that I am worth the sacrifice and I will not
settle for less.

 

[tigerrose]

Crystalicequeen123 Welcome back! I'm glad you are still
on the journey! I have realized that my love journey is a part of
this journey called life. I only have one life and every part of my
Journey...love, money, career, fitness, etc...it all has to work
together.

I have spent too many years trying to put one part of my life
on hold while I tried to get another part working just the way I
wanted it to. I even bought into the lies I was told by others about
how a woman needs to have her finances together and in so
many ways become superwoman before she could attract a husband.

Then as I became more successful, I was told that it is harder for
successful black women to find a husband. The more success you
have...the harder it becomes to have a husband. And I heard this
only from black people!

I have finally learned to go with the flow of life. I am ever evolving
during my life journey and my husband will be too.
Right now I am working on improving my finances, fitness and
career. And the man who is the One for me will love me while
I am a work in progress...because I will always be a work in progress...
And so will he!

So stay open to receiving and giving love...always.
Even if you are not working the course stay focused on love.
Don't stress about how long it takes to complete the book
because the ultimate purpose was to get you started on your
Love Journey. You may meet the One at your next apartment
so keep your mind and heart open to love!

 

[CurlyMoo]

I officially finished the course today! That was fast! I'm so glad I took part in this challenge. I honestly wouldn't have finished it if it wasn't for the private group. Checking in daily and keeping in touch with the other ladies kept me on track. I had so many aha moments while reading this book! I can actually see all the blocks I had to love and how to move past them. I'm a lot more loving and open to love in general. I can also identify when I'm feeling anxious and soothe myself. I had a lot of anxiety about love and all that it entails! Now I can calm myself and stop running away whenever something looks promising. That alone was worth the entire course to me.

How long did it take you to do it?

 

[caribeandiva]

How long did it take you to do it?

CurlyMoo8.5 weeks. I started during the holiday season and that was hard to stay focused at times with all the events and get togethers happening.