Black women

[mischka]

I don't think it really matters. If the area is diverse enough (you know, as long as we're not talking about alabama or some other incredibly southern state) I think it depends on the people involved. I live in the midwest which is not necessarily a hotbed of interracial dating and I'm finding no shortage.

 

[UmSumayyah]

I'm not familiar with her...or really anyone else here. I haven't been a member very long and I dropped off about 9 mos. ago only to return recently. Is this a good thing that she'd like my "story" or a bad thing?

She's not here anymore.

It's not good or bad. She just has a love for the dramatic, but that's part of her angle.

 

[Raspberry]

I don't think it really matters. If the area is diverse enough (you know, as long as we're not talking about alabama or some other incredibly southern state) I think it depends on the people involved. I live in the midwest which is not necessarily a hotbed of interracial dating and I'm finding no shortage.

I agree.. also I would bet you have a diverse social circle in general.

I believe much of this boils down to shared environments and interests, it's often stated that black women are against interracial dating or that non-black men don't want them but most of the black women saying these things don't actually socialize with any non-black men..or women either for that matter.

All of the black women I know who date/marry interracially have plenty of non-black friends with shared interests through work, school, church, sports, etc. I hear a lot of black women saying they stick to themselves on the job, don't want to hang out with non-black co-workers outside of work, etc.. which is all good but that attitude often limits your social experiences.

Now if you have no desire to socialize with non-black men that's perfectly fine.. just acknowledge that and do what it takes to surround yourselves with more black guys..cause never exposing yourself to non-black men socially and expecting them to "approach" you out of the blue is unrealistic.

 

[lushcoils]

...cause never exposing yourself to non-black men socially and expecting them to "approach" you out of the blue is unrealistic.

This statement is interesting..as many on here have stated that an attractive black woman will easily have non-black men approaching her out of the blue often.

 

[Raspberry]

This statement is interesting..as many on here have stated that an attractive black woman will easily have non-black men approaching her out of the blue often.

Really? I guess I don't agree.. unless you're already on their turf, like at an all white concert or bar or something where the comfort level and assumptions are different.

 

[StarScream35]

Really? I guess I don't agree.. unless you're already on their turf, like at an all white concert or bar or something where the comfort level and assumptions are different.

I have to cosign on this. You really have to be on their turf for this to happen. Non-black men will check a good looking sista out but approaching is a different story.

 

[Etherealsmile]

I have to cosign on this. You really have to be on their turf for this to happen. Non-black men will check a good looking sista out but approaching is a different story.

I don't agree, I've been approached by white men randomly and I was rarely in an all white environment

(experiences from when I was in shape)

I've had white men approach me in grocery stores, book stores, gas stations etc.

I think location might have something to do with iterplexed

 

[StarScream35]

I don't agree, I've been approached by white men randomly and I was rarely in an all white environment

(experiences from when I was in shape)

I've had white men approach me in grocery stores, book stores, gas stations etc.

I think location might have something to do with iterplexed

I do agree about location. I grew up in the southern states and I can tell you that rarely ever happened UNLESS he was a wigger. I live in the Midwest and its still pretty the same here. But then the South and Midwest are very conservative so in these areas you do have to be on their turf. In places like Cali or Seattle, I'm sure the story is different. But then, if that's the case, why aren't more black women married to white men???? There are sizable black populations in those places, so I don't get it??? SMH

 

[Etherealsmile]

I do agree about location. I grew up in the southern states and I can tell you that rarely ever happened UNLESS he was a wigger. I live in the Midwest and its still pretty the same here. But then the South and Midwest are very conservative so in these areas you do have to be on their turf. In places like Cali or Seattle, I'm sure the story is different. But then, if that's the case, why aren't more black women married to white men???? There are sizable black populations in those places, so I don't get it??? SMH

Do these black women want to marry white men?

As much as there are black women who are interested in dating/marrying white men, that number is still very small in comparison to the number of black women who are only interested in dating/marrying black men.

If a black woman wants to marry a white man, she will; there are too many of them interested in us but not enough of us interested in them

 

[lushcoils]

But then, if that's the case, why aren't more black women married to white men???? There are sizable black populations in those places, so I don't get it??? SMH

Unpopular opinion here. But I think there's a lack of interest from both sides. The typical black woman is checking for black men. The typical white man is checking for whites, latinos, asians. I think the growth between bw and wm/am will continue to move slowly as wm/am check nothing but black and bw keep preaching the I only want a black kang statement. Until the average wm/am start showing interest in bw, and bw learn that they have options, we continue to ask questions like yours.


(I don't really get approached, so I can't include myself in my observations. But when I'm out and about in nice areas/events that are multicultural or mostly nonblack, I don't really see white men or asian men (attractive ones in my age group) checking out or approaching attractive slim black women. Now, black men, latino men, and older white men (45+) ... yes, I see them flirt, approach, gawk at black women (and sometimes myself included).

I know most black women here get approached randomly by attractive white/asian men in their age group, but I do wonder what's the common flirting/approaching experience when it comes to random non black men/non latino men/non older or non thuggish white men for the average black woman (the slim, attractive, smart ones...).

*And no, I'm not fat nor hideous.

** And no, this is not a woe is me post. Just an observation.

 

[nomadpixi]

I think there's another social aspect we must consider...There's a whole generation of couples that got divorced in droves in the last 10 years. There's a whole subset of MEN, of ANY race that have cold feet towards marriage. My ex-husband was black. But I know live where there are no black men that aren't African, already married or both. I decided to be open to dating anyone that approached me that had at least 60% of my "man list". And that's what needs to happen. Each woman needs to list the qualities of the man she wants to be with. If black happens to fall off the list, oh well. The sum of the rest of the man is still quality.

 

[Esthi777]

Do these black women want to marry white men?

As much as there are black women who are interested in dating/marrying white men, that number is still very small in comparison to the number of black women who are only interested in dating/marrying black men.

If a black woman wants to marry a white man, she will; there are too many of them interested in us but not enough of us interested in them

AGREED!!!

 

[Esthi777]

Unpopular opinion here. But I think there's a lack of interest from both sides. The typical black woman is checking for black men. The typical white man is checking for whites, latinos, asians. I think the growth between bw and wm/am will continue to move slowly as wm/am check nothing but black and bw keep preaching the I only want a black kang statement. Until the average wm/am start showing interest in bw, and bw learn that they have options, we continue to ask questions like yours.


(I don't really get approached, so I can't include myself in my observations. But when I'm out and about in nice areas/events that are multicultural or mostly nonblack, I don't really see white men or asian men (attractive ones in my age group) checking out or approaching attractive slim black women. Now, black men, latino men, and older white men (45+) ... yes, I see them flirt, approach, gawk at black women (and sometimes myself included).

I know most black women here get approached randomly by attractive white/asian men in their age group, but I do wonder what's the common flirting/approaching experience when it comes to random non black men/non latino men/non older or non thuggish white men for the average black woman (the slim, attractive, smart ones...).

*And no, I'm not fat nor hideous.

** And no, this is not a woe is me post. Just an observation.

lushcoils OK, I'll bite. In the community of California that I live in, the population here is mostly white and mexican with a few blacks sprinkled here and there. I mostly get approached by white and mexican men. Their approach is really casual (whites). There is usually no game or throwing ridiculous lines. They stare (and don't look away). They usually send a drink over or will ask a question. I think at this point they are trying to see how you act and want to see if you are articulate or loud and obnoxious (although, I think they already know at this point by how you hold/present yourself). If you can hold a conversation with them and have the same interests, it's usually on from there. It's pretty simple with the white men here. As far as Mexicans, I can't really vouch for them because most of them here are straight from Mexico and I'm just not interested so I don't even entertain it.