:waytogo:
Women are NOT responsible for the behaviors of grown men.When will we finally learn this? If a man doesn't respect you, that's on him...but your reactions are on you.
Marriage is trending downwards anyway, in all racial groups and SES. Black men (in this case, but usually BP in general) are the "trendsetters" in the ol' sociology sense, as always. Truthfully, the pool of men of all races willing to legally marry is shrinking.
They're sticking their heads in the sand (tho I'd suggest elsewhere) because they are in DE NILE
Many women are still expecting what their mothers and grandmothers reasonably did, but not reckoning w/ the changing WORLD. They need to check the marriage/divorce/cohabiting stats from most of the Western world to see the big pic. If anything, America..w/ it's religiosity and "family values", is still the country were Western folks marry most (adjusted to per capita) and are most likely to.
I said it before and I will say it again, do I get a cookie or a drumstick if I find a White man to marry?
I'm happy you're happy OP but I have and love a BM who has proved each and every one of the "stereotypes" wrong.
What "package?" Is your man the stereotypical White man?
). Her father was an executive and her mother owned and worked in a beauty shop. Difference of 'class' per se but it worked for them. Not every man like Matthew wants a Michelle.
You would know wouldn't you? I'll take it from one who's "been there and done that." (And I only skimmed your first post - and of course the one I quoted).
Before this thread gets the lock down, I want to address something...
Sure many people marry on their level, but this isn't always the case and that isn't a bad thing--unless the woman is having to marry down significantly.
In the case of men...
Not every executive, advanced degree yielding man wants a professional woman. Many men in high positions want wives who can hold down the home front, dedicate their time to raising the kids, and support him in his career. A jet-setting executive might have a hard time maintaining a marriage with a wife who has an equally demanding career.
I find that it's usually in the black community where successful men are encouraged to only seek out equally successful women, and while I don't see this as a bad thing, I will say that the motivation behind this trend isn't always positive.
In many other cultures, a woman is expected to marry up--not just on her level. With black women there is this belief that you can only get a man on your level or below. Any man on a level higher than yourself is too good for you.
There are many classes between people with doctorate degrees and hoodrats. Look at the Knowles (had to bring in Beyonce
), big law, economist Paul Krugman (look up his wife y'all ), etc type WM...few, if any, have wives that are as educated and/or as active in biz as they are. BP seem more into being 'equally yoked" or something. :scratchch: I can fully understand that a man doesn't want an embarrassment up in his mix , but there's definitely something to what you're saying. Of course, not everybody w/ a high end degree got rid of their "hoodrattitude" either! 
w/in the BC. Rather few BM hold prominent high end jobs, so the opportunities are fewer. This is just a numbers game, IMHO. I mean, who is BOTH unmarried and a BM, that would be on Condi's level? 
I missed a lot today
Ya know BSB, I never really considered it that way :scratchch:, but you have a really great point. Rarely if ever do you read about a high end CEO (say Bernie Madoff
Outside of sports/celebs, BW have few opportinuties to mary UP
although I must say the socio-eco. portion of this arguement (concerning BC and the need to be = yolked vs WC)might need it's own thread if one doesn't already exist.
yet real physical attraction once a BM let them down. This gave them "permission" to act, so to speak. Some BW are still afraid admit that they're primarily or only attracted to non BM and will fake da funk w/ a BM until they get an excuse to do otherwise. Some like to cover it up w/ Zeus like thunderbolt epiphanies! 
on them in a NYC sec. On this matter, some BW are something like closeted gay men where some incident pushed them to accept their true nature. It is what it is. 
