A Man Asks You To Clean His Place

So many reasons. I was typing them out, but @luckiestdestiny covered it all.

I mean, you asked if she should clean the place (so we addressed that: “Naw) but the real answer is cut the dude loose.

ETA: I hate that she’s considering settling for THIS.

Miss_C said:
Can you be more specific as to why? She knows 3 who say this is fixable and they’ll just have to hire a housekeeper.

I object to cleaning his place for many reasons but I’m not married so my opinion isn’t based on experience, just principle.
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No. He is a loser. Not only should she not do it, she should not continue to date this clown, let alone marry and/or (heaven forbid) have a child with him.

The fact that those married women are encouraging her to do it is insane. She should leave them too.
 
220px-Ariana_Grande_Thank_U_Next.png
 
Pay for a cleaning service , usually about $76, and have him to pay you back via a couple of dinners

But this may be a test. If he know he can get you to this, you might be about to see the real him...monster....run.

OR
Even better. Schedule a day when you can assist him. Tell him you can only give him a couple of hours

Personally,

I am a good at assisting and better at delegating. I show him where to put things using an organizational chart

Don't be good at something you don't want to do
 
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Gin&Tonic said:
Men know who to try. No man has ever asked me to clean their home, but a man has sent people over to help me- lawn, fix the roof, finish the basement.

A man who cares has a housekeeper come help so that his place can be acceptable to his girlfriend -he does not ask his lady to clean. She may find him filthy and leave.

If he's not trying to impress her- he doesn't really want her.
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:worship2: :worship2: :worship2: :worship2: :worship2:
 
I don’t clean boyfriend houses. If he is so gainfully employed he can get a cleaner. What do I look like?

What does being 300 lbs have to do with accepting or not accepting a request? Sounds like another question to me.
 
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Dellas said:
Pay for a cleaning service , usually about $76, and have him to pay you back via a couple of dinners

But this may be a test. If he know he can get you to this, you might be about to see the real him.

OR
Even better. Schedule a day when you can assist him. Tell him you can only give him a couple of hours

Personally,

I am a good at assisting and better at delegating. I show him where to put things using an organizational chart

Don't be good at something you don't want to do
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Maybe OP could pass along your info and we can free that other girl. :look:
 
vevster said:
I don’t clean boyfriend houses. If he is so gainfully employed he can get a cleaner. What do I look like?

What does being 300 lbs have to do with accepting or not accepting a request? Sounds like another question to me.
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That's what I wanted to know. His weight clearly doesn't bother her if she's been dating him for six months.

As to the cleaning, heck no. Im not even assisting.
 
Miss_C said:
She doesn’t want to do it- she says she prefers guys who are more self sufficicient but she’s gotten some feedback from older married women who say this is fixable and she should give him a chance. She doesn’t want to be single but she still isn’t all the way sold on this guy, as it could definitely be a lifetime of more than she bargained for.

Mid 30s are a beast, man.
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No. She will regret it. He is morbidly obese. And he’s a hoarder. He does not care about his health or his physical surroundings. He also is not clear whether she is the only one. And he has archaic views as a white collar professional to think a maid is not worth this job.

She should run. Also, just bc he has a master’s or professional degree and is working at someone’s or his own desk, she needs to find out his salary. So many white collar guys slaving away at these non profits and community action groups and think bc they’re degreed they deserve a woman of similar education level. Some times the woman is pulling in significantly more and he still expects traditional home life even though he is not the main provider. If he’s not the main provider financially, no way can he expect a woman to clean for him. Even if he is making more, they are not married so she has no responsibility to clean his home. Run away. These men really out here trying to have us audition for wife. Well why don’t they audition for husband and pay our bills and mortgage if they trying to live in 1952 in terms of home life?

I hate fat men, especially an overly entitled one. I once knew a dude who was morbidly obese to the point he was considering surgery. I referred to the mom of his two kids who he lived with as his wife. This big pun looking dude had the nerve to say “nah, I’m still not ready to tie the knot yet. Still figuring out me.” I smiled and turned my head. He was obese and was low income enough to qualify for somebody’s Medicaid. I was like da hell? Male privilege is on some next level ish and surpasses even white privilege for me.
 
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ladysaraii said:
That's what I wanted to know. His weight clearly doesn't bother her if she's been dating him for six months.

As to the cleaning, heck no. Im not even assisting.
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It bothers her. Or OP wouldn’t know his weight. In mid 30s, women relax physical standards and date the fat and very short hoping their “Prince” is coming in a non standard package. Some women luck out. This woman has not. Such an obese person, who is cheap and a hoarder. This sounds like a making of a TLC show. Steups.

The friend in question probably thinking why I let this big man with breasts sweat on top of me for the past couple of months and now this fool has the nerve to ask me to clean his spot?!?! He should be happy she’s even willing to copulate with him.
 
He's trying to nickel and dime her BEFORE marriage so even if they would get together and marry he will nickel and dime her later.

NO NO NO

And cleaning his house is a people pleaser activity. She's trying to audition her worth as a wife. That's putting this dude on a pedestal. If you put a man on a pedestal he has no other choice but to look down on you. SHE is the prize so if HE wants a clean house he can pay for it or clean it himself.

She shouldn't go back into his space either until it's clean. That disrupts her peace. It's all about boundaries.
 
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