Whose Side Are You On?

Whose side are you on?

  • The mother's

    Votes: 16 59.3%

  • The father's

    Votes: 11 40.7%
  • Total voters
    27
I can see both sides. Six hundred dollars can buy quite a bit for one kid and if I were him I wouldn't like the idea of my child having less than what I intended for my child to have. However, as the mother who is taking the kids back to school shopping I'm sure it wouldn't be easy for her to explain to the other kids why their sibling is able to get more than they are able to get. Tough situation.
 
If I am correct.
Child support is intended to have the parent contribute [equitibly] to the care and upbringing of their child.
Anything else is considered a "Gift". ....​
SO based on that, if he wanted to control what was purchased with that $600 gift he should have made the purchases instead.

ON THE OTHER HAND....Can he sue the other Dads to recover his perceived losses? ....That would be fun:abducted:
 
He sounds mean Bc any reasonable person would at least understand her perspective.

A real man would have also given a LITTLE SOMETHING for the other two kids, IMO. I hate it when adults know there are multiple kids in a household and continue to do things for one & not the others.

My family as a whole don’t play that - my cousin gets a new stepbrother = I have a new “cousin”. They both get gifts - maybe not financially equivalent - but still.
 
Last edited:
Everything Zen said:
^^^ Unfortunately- that mess is some children’s reality. Some kids get upset with the sibling that has the parent that is providing and will trash their stuff too. Also father’s can’t be providing for an entire tribe all the time- especially when there may be extreme age differences as well. :sad:
Click to expand...

Oh I can imagine that that situation happens all the time - I'm just not buying the story relayed and I'm not feeling the reasons why it was posted.

I actually don't think that the father should have to buy stuff for the children that were born after the break-up, but I think the people posting these scenarios on social media are usually doing it with the intention of dragging women publicly. It's all very transparent and I'm not here for it
 
This meme has been going around the Internet for years. Aren't men tired of concocting these scenarios to make single mothers look bad and as reasons for not paying child support? Once that money enters her hands/account he has no control over it. If he wants control, he should buy the supplies himself.
 
MissNina said:
He sounds mean Bc any reasonable person would at least understand her perspective.

A real man would have also given a LITTLE SOMETHING for the other two kids, IMO. I hate it when adults know there are multiple kids in a household and continue to do things for one & not the others.

My family as a whole don’t play that - my cousin gets a new stepbrother = I have a new “cousin”. They both get gifts - maybe not financially equivalent - but still.
Click to expand...
Yep. I have a nephew like this. I don’t get to buy for his siblings and not him. It ain’t the kids fault their parents are trife.
 
And another thing - child support doesn’t just have to go towards buying the child stuff. The child needs food, electricity and water too right?! The whole cheque doesn’t have to go on tangible items. There’s so many men who use child support as a way to control women - no you can’t just bring items for the child instead of sending money. That money is needed too, and no the mother doesn’t have to show you receipts. The fact that your child is alive, fed, clean and happy is receipt enough.
 
Mai Tai said:
GIRL! I wasn't going to go there because these trifling men NEVER consider this as a viable option. They would rather force a woman to be the primary caregiver yet villianize her for assuring that ALL of her kids that live in HER house are taken care of.
Click to expand...

Most mothers want their children with them most of the time though.

I recognize this scenario from a long while back, but for the sake of playing along, I couldn't blame either mother or father, really, other than for the creation of this messy situation.
 
I've posted similar scenarios with no pro male scenario. That said, this is one of the very few instances that I'm on the fathers side. By splitting that money, the mother is punishing both Daddy Do Right AND the kid she had by him. If the kids with dead beat daddy's are coming up short then that is solely on her to hustle up some equality for them.

For those of ya'll who buying gifts for every new non blood related kid added to your tribe :up:

One of my three brothers baby mama's has 6 other kids that ain't his. That's just one brother and one baby mama of I lose count how many. I wish I would call myself tryna be Jewish Santa Claus in that joint. My stance isn't based on my brothers because I care not what happens to their money. My mother was one of them "treat all the kids" the same types. You know what it got her ? Broke. And nan one of them bastids showed up at her funeral. All of her trifling blood grandchildren found a way to be there tho. :mad:
 
Everything Zen said:
^^^ Got you beat- the anecdote that I was speaking of had 7 kids by 6 different men. The only reason two of the kids have the same daddy is bc they’re twins. :rose: It’s one of the most :censored: situations I’ve ever heard of .

I thank God that they’re white, no relation.
Click to expand...
That's the exact scenario with my brother. He got 2 for 1 with that human slot machine he laid up with. As trifling as he is, to this day she says he's done more for her than any of her other baby daddies and I'm like

Them other dudes must have been something else.
 
Crackers Phinn said:
I've posted similar scenarios with no pro male scenario. That said, this is one of the very few instances that I'm on the fathers side. By splitting that money, the mother is punishing both Daddy Do Right AND the kid she had by him. If the kids with dead beat daddy's are coming up short then that is solely on her to hustle up some equality for them.

For those of ya'll who buying gifts for every new non blood related kid added to your tribe :up:

One of my three brothers baby mama's has 6 other kids that ain't his. That's just one brother and one baby mama of I lose count how many. I wish I would call myself tryna be Jewish Santa Claus in that joint. My stance isn't based on my brothers because I care not what happens to their money. My mother was one of them "treat all the kids" the same types. You know what it got her ? Broke. And nan one of them bastids showed up at her funeral. All of her trifling blood grandchildren found a way to be there tho. :mad:
Click to expand...

Im with you on this one. My money goes to my kid.

My sister is a single mom and if she marries someone with a kid, I'll be reasonable, but my resources are for my nephew. If I provide money, I expect it to go to him.
 
If a man is paying support and his child’s mother has other children, there is no way to ensure that the support he pays is going 100% to his kid only. Unless dad buys it himself, his child will not have extra clothes or toys, no more than they’ll have extra food or extra heat and electricity, than the other kids in the home. That’s life. If you want all your money going to just your offspring, don’t have a baby mama. Find a wife, have a child, and spend all the money you want on their school clothes.
 
Theresamonet said:
If a man is paying support and his child’s mother has other children, there is no way to ensure that the support he pays is going 100% to his kid only. Unless dad buys it himself, his child will not have extra clothes or toys, no more than they’ll have extra food or extra heat and electricity, than the other kids in the home. That’s life. If you want all your money going to just your offspring, don’t have a baby mama. Find a wife, have a child, and spend all the money you want on their school clothes.
Click to expand...

I agree. I do think child support is different from money given for a specific purpose/event (school supplies, gifts, etc), but I know people have different views on that.

I'd even say if mom bought a bunch of paper, crayons, etc and the kids used them, that's one thing. I could see how someone would would be miffed if their money was funding personal items for the others.
 
This meme will be repurposed around Christmas just so ya'll know. Are we to believe that a man whose that concerned about the whereabouts of his school supply and uniform money is handing over $600 to anybody? And who told him that it wasn't spent on his kid? She conveniently has two kids with two other daddies to look as bad as possible in this scenario. The purpose of this meme and any other one that ends with "Thoughts?" is not to have a sensible discussion, because the root of that tree is to not create these kinds of situations LOL
 
Everything Zen said:
^^^ Unfortunately- that mess is some children’s reality. Some kids get upset with the sibling that has the parent that is providing and will trash their stuff too. Also father’s can’t be providing for an entire tribe all the time- especially when there may be extreme age differences as well. :sad:
Click to expand...


Unfortunately lots of people's reality, I have a friend who has 5 siblings and there are 4 different dads, her dad paid for her to go to college and one of her siblings is jealous. She made that clear while growing up all the way to adulthood, example my friend helped her sis to get a job at the same place she works at yet no one knows they are related, she was getting married and invited her co workers but didn't invite her sister, it's deep, they are estranged.
 
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