When you get discouraged, remember: A LOT can change in a short amount of time!
- Thread starter Glib Gurl
- Start date
deltadreamland
Well-Known Member
I want to encourage the over 40's and 50's out there. It's not too late for us either. Trust God and He will do it!
After waiting years for her old boyfriend to marry her, my 51 yo gf married her new husband this summer (after a 6 mo courtship). Then, she encouraged me to contact my ex bf (who's been trying to get back with me for 9 years).
I don't usually condone going back to an ex, but sometimes we are our own worst enemy. After her wedding, I called him and he let me know right away that he has been praying for the day that I become his wife. Needless to say, we will be the next ones walking down the aisle.
I thank God for giving us this second chance!
Confirmation. Thank you!
Keshieshimmer
Active Member
Ok so I don't know this girl for real but this girl just started dating this dude this year and almost 6 or 7 months later she is engaged. Fabulous. Here is her ring video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TZ-Uqss8kQQ&feature=mfu_in_order&list=UL
She will be posting a video soon.
EDIT: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2CJkr0RKsEk Here is her story. She is I 36. FYI She met him at a Lounge, SO GET OUT LADIES!
Don't give up Ladies. In due time for us all =)
She will be posting a video soon.
EDIT: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2CJkr0RKsEk Here is her story. She is I 36. FYI She met him at a Lounge, SO GET OUT LADIES!
Don't give up Ladies. In due time for us all =)
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Love Always
Well-Known Member
She did a whole lotta rambling in the first seven minutes 
but other than that she really encouraged me and gave me some hope. Thanks for posting Keshieshimmer.
but other than that she really encouraged me and gave me some hope. Thanks for posting Keshieshimmer.
hopeful
Well-Known Member
She did a whole lotta rambling in the first seven minutes
Love Always yes indeed, a whole lotta rambling about nothing lol. But her ring was absolutely gorgeous!
Guitarhero
New Member
I don't usually condone going back to an ex, but sometimes we are our own worst enemy. After her wedding, I called him and he let me know right away that he has been praying for the day that I become his wife. Needless to say, we will be the next ones walking down the aisle.
I thank God for giving us this second chance!
What a blessing!!!!
hopeful
Well-Known Member
Thanks for updating with the new video. I had only seen the other two you posted initially. This video almost made me cry.
VelvetRain
Well-Known Member
Honestly I swear alot of this stuff is internal in terms of self reflection and living your life in accordance with how god wants us all to. It's truly hard to expect god to position you to be found by a man of god if your not living right, cultivating humble spirit etc. Its like getting back to basics.
Keshieshimmer
Active Member
Should we even be looking? As much as I want to just be out "enjoying life" I often think about being with a true love. As I converse with some of these men I get so disappointed.
Well I think in erica's case she decided to be more social and she met men that way. So she was looking, he found her.
VelvetRain
Well-Known Member
Should we even be looking? As much as I want to just be out "enjoying life" I often think about being with a true love. As I converse with some of these men I get so disappointed.
I agree with you. None of us should be looking for anyone. I stopped the whole looking thing this past summer and merely just concentrated on being the best woman I could be in terms of my personality and mentality and sought to grow closer to god with my spiritual relationship and was truly positioned to meet that great guy which I did meet back in September. We are still going strong with our relationship.
If you are the best possible women you will attract the best possible man into your life with the qualities you want. Everytime I was looking was when I found something that was either not good for me anyway or something that I really didn't want. Let's not forget that the bible says he who finds a wife finds a good thing. It's nothing in there about us looking for him.
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BlackHairDiva
Well-Known Member
THis story gives me hope and at the same time there is a small voice of me that keeps saying...oh well..of course she is engaged in 6 months..she is stunning.
Right. Closed mouths do not get fed. If you want anything in life, go for it. Put yourself out there. Don't sit in the sidelines waiting for God to send you a man, doing nothing, and hoping it happens. God helps those who help themselves.
I don't get how not looking for a man will get you one. You have to do something/go somewhere to be seen. I think the definition of looking is given a negative connotation. No, one says you got to go out in the world and shout, I want a man or flirt with every guy you see.
Just putting yourself out there to be surrounded by possible suitors or matchmakers is looking, even if it's indirectly doing an activity you like where you weren't suspecting to meet someone. It's not possible to meet someone without looking (putting yourself out there intentionally or unintentionally) unless it's your delivery/maintenance guy knocking on your door or you have a friend set you up.
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Highly Favored8
Well-Known Member
Keshieshimmer thank you for this video. Her ring is beautiful! Congratulations to her and her future hubby.
Renewed1
Well-Known Member
Everything you said lushcoils is so true. I let everyone I know, that I'm ready to get married. I have events scheduled in January,where friends are taking me to meet guys.
I think it's important to let it be known that you are ready for marriage.
But in the mean time you should doing things as a single person. Things will fall into place when it's time.
frostydoll
Well-Known Member
So much can change in a year. Last year this time me and my now DH were trying to bounce back from a horrible breakup and tons of trust issues. I felt sad and ready to give up, but I decided not to break up with him before we left for the holidays, since I've done that in the past and never followed through once the new year started. We both went home for the holidays and for the first time since we started dating he said we should spend NYE together. We decided to get a hotel room and just enjoy one another's company... we made dinner together and watched the countdown... it was relaxing and romantic and a great start to our year. Some time that weekend he told me he was serious about us pursuing a future together... I was of course skeptical. The next month we talked about engagement and he said he saw it in the next year... still skeptical.
We spent most of 2011 just having fun w/ each other and getting past the things that had caused us so much stress in 2010. He kept talking about marriage and trying to show me he was serious... we started picking out rings and telling our families to expect something soon. I went home w/ him for the 4th of July to meet his extended family something that he's never done before and everyone was shocked to hear him introduce someone as his girlfriend over and over again. I left to come back because I was taking summer classes and he stayed for another week and a half. We again starting talking about getting married and picking dates... I suggested 10.26/29.12 (6 years to the day that he offered me a ride home and we hung out the first time)... he said 5 is better than 6 I laughed hysterically and told him there was no way we could find a place to live and get married in the next 3 months. Well a few days later I woke up w/ very sore breasts and my period wasn't due or late, so I was confused. I decided to take a pregnancy test that night... fell asleep before reading the results (that should have been my first clue)... woke up the next morning saw the test and SPAZZED out! I called him a million times and he was just as calm as could be... what did he say well I guess we're getting married this October lol. On October 29, 2011 (5 years to the day that we hung out for the first time) he became my husband. Today I'm 6 months pregnant and we're expecting a baby boy in late March.
If anyone had told me that I would be here before the end of 2011 I would have laughed in their face... I actually did laugh at the psychic who told me this last year. I am so incredibly happy and while I didn't want it to all happen at once I'm glad it did. I feel like I finally have it all... 2.5 degrees, a husband who adores me and treats me like a princess, and in a few months a child of our own who will make our family complete.
We spent most of 2011 just having fun w/ each other and getting past the things that had caused us so much stress in 2010. He kept talking about marriage and trying to show me he was serious... we started picking out rings and telling our families to expect something soon. I went home w/ him for the 4th of July to meet his extended family something that he's never done before and everyone was shocked to hear him introduce someone as his girlfriend over and over again. I left to come back because I was taking summer classes and he stayed for another week and a half. We again starting talking about getting married and picking dates... I suggested 10.26/29.12 (6 years to the day that he offered me a ride home and we hung out the first time)... he said 5 is better than 6 I laughed hysterically and told him there was no way we could find a place to live and get married in the next 3 months. Well a few days later I woke up w/ very sore breasts and my period wasn't due or late, so I was confused. I decided to take a pregnancy test that night... fell asleep before reading the results (that should have been my first clue)... woke up the next morning saw the test and SPAZZED out! I called him a million times and he was just as calm as could be... what did he say well I guess we're getting married this October lol. On October 29, 2011 (5 years to the day that we hung out for the first time) he became my husband. Today I'm 6 months pregnant and we're expecting a baby boy in late March.
If anyone had told me that I would be here before the end of 2011 I would have laughed in their face... I actually did laugh at the psychic who told me this last year. I am so incredibly happy and while I didn't want it to all happen at once I'm glad it did. I feel like I finally have it all... 2.5 degrees, a husband who adores me and treats me like a princess, and in a few months a child of our own who will make our family complete.
Theo
New Member
Wow... I love her ring. And yes she was rambling but I found her excitement so cute
I'm anti big rings but that one was so pretty, I think I want it.
FemmeCreole
Island Gyal
This is happening for me right now... I'll give more detail in a week
FemmeCreole where are the details.
This thread is really helping me out. I ended it with a guy I am crazy about a month ago. We seemed perfect for each other but he is not ready for a commitment. I feel so lonely. I'll be thirty next year...
Sorry to put a damper on this thread but I am still feeling down about being single. It's been a while since I was in a committed relationship.
BronzyBella
Well-Known Member
This gives me hope going into 2012. Dating is not one of my priorities right now, but I truly believe that once I accomplish some of my current goals, things will fall into place when it comes to meeting the right people/person. 
candie19
Well-Known Member
I have a friend that has an account on Facebook. She wanted to start Jan 2010 off right by cleaning out her account by deleting people she didn't know. She was about a delete a friend because she didn't know him. Before deleting, she e-mailed him and asked how they knew each other. He said they didn't know each other but he requested her as a friend because her profile pic was beautiful. They e-mailed which turned into phone calls. He lived in VA, she lived in GA. He asked her out on a date, he flew into GA took out to dinner and flew back to VA. He knew then he wanted to marry her. By that Aug. he had written a letter to her son asking for permission to marry her. During the same month he had to serve in Iraq, which is was called to do last minute. That Nov. my girlfriend wakes me up and called me over to the house with my camcorder 10 in the morning. I get there with FedEx delivery. They deliver her engagment ring and her boyfriend skypes in and proposes. They were married May of 2011.He is so well off she quit her job. She's a real "Housewife of Atlanta".
Go to you Facebook ladies, your hubby could already be in your life and you didn't know it.
Go to you Facebook ladies, your hubby could already be in your life and you didn't know it.
RoundEyedGirl504
Well-Known Member
LivingDol1
Well-Known Member
Glad to see this thread bumped. I need to remember that things can change. Anything can happen! Even though I feel like the last 4 years have been pretty much the same (go to work. Hang out with gal pals.), you never know. At least I'm trying to tweak my life so that change will come!
FemmeCreole
Island Gyal
OMG.. I totally forgot about this thread! You're not being a pest
I don't want to make this long but anyways I was in a 3 year relationship with a man I thought would turn out to be my husband. He was a divorced and felt that marriage changes people so he didn't want to go down that road again. We lived together for about 1.5 years. Against my better judgement I stayed.. hoping he would change his mind and see me for me and not a replica of his ex-wife. Anyways I finally had enough and I moved out. It hurt like hell but I love myself more. When I got the opportunity to transfer, I jumped at it to put more space in between us.
I now live in FL and I've dated but nothing turned out serious... I thought one of the guys would be great... I still think he's a great guy, but he needs to figure out what exactly he wants.
Long story short I rekindled an old friendship last fall that turned into a romance and now we're planning a wedding for April/May.
Jmartjrmd
Well-Known Member
I'll share my story:
I dated the same guy from my freshman year in high school to my senior year in college. And aside from us breaking up a few times, and me going out for a night or two with other guys, he was the only boyfriend I ever had. I thought he was the one and once we graduated college he'd marry me and we'd live happily ever after. Well it never happened. I kept hoping and thinking he just needed more time but long story short it took me years to realize he just wasn't the one.
I went into a serious depression having "wasted" 8 years of my life waiting on him. I just wish I would have opened my eyes sooner to the facts that were there all along.
My depression wasn't just because of mourning the loss of that relationship but with what was going on with life in general.
It took me about a year and half before I even opened my heart to trying to date again. I did the match.com and eharmony thing but in alot of ways those sites just made it worse. I'm a nurse, so in a female dominated field, plus I work with babies, and most doctors just don't date nurses so no prospects there. I felt hopeless and just closed my heart to finding someone {else}.
I didn't feel like I had an identity without my ex so I stupidly went back to him thinking this time he would be different. Big mistake. Wasted another year thinking again he'd change but finally just had to face the facts...he just didn't love me. It was hard to let go even knowing that he just wasn't it....I didn't know anything different and I wanted him to be it.
Moved on for good but then became content with just being alone. I made my life about my family, career and traveling and that was that.
Fast forward a few years and I was in the library researching another trip I was going to take. I hadn't dated since I left my ex and wasn't even looking to date. I was minding my business when my now fiance, struck up a conversation about the travel books I was looking at. I made small talk with him but didn't think anything of it.
A few weeks went by and I ran into him again.... at the library. We talked more and eventually he asked me out. I blew him off 3 times before I finally agreed to go out with him. It was a great first date but things didn't go so smoothly after that. Dating was awkward for me, because a part of me still identified myself as I was with my ex.
erplexed
But my fiance didn't give up on me and I started to relax and be myself around him. But there was another problem in that I traveled for a living for my job so while I loved having him around I still hadn't opened my heart to anything other than a friendship which made it easy for me to leave the city once it was time to move on from my job. He however, never let the distance or the wall I put up destroy our relationship. I almost ruined it. Almost.
To make a long story short I eventually realized that if I kept pushing this man away that I was going to lose him for good and would have had no one to blame but myself. I had to wake up to the fact that my ex was long gone and I was worthy and capable of being loved and loving someone else. The past was indeed the past.
We dated for a year and 4 months before he asked me to marry him. i posted our engagement story in the Wedding section.
So in my case, the person that was supposed to be in my life came and I almost didn't let him in. In my case it was so true that he showed up when and where i least expected it.
So never give up hope, I had, but I guess hope didn't give up on me. I'm the happiest I've ever been in a long, long time.
I dated the same guy from my freshman year in high school to my senior year in college. And aside from us breaking up a few times, and me going out for a night or two with other guys, he was the only boyfriend I ever had. I thought he was the one and once we graduated college he'd marry me and we'd live happily ever after. Well it never happened. I kept hoping and thinking he just needed more time but long story short it took me years to realize he just wasn't the one.
I went into a serious depression having "wasted" 8 years of my life waiting on him. I just wish I would have opened my eyes sooner to the facts that were there all along.
My depression wasn't just because of mourning the loss of that relationship but with what was going on with life in general.
It took me about a year and half before I even opened my heart to trying to date again. I did the match.com and eharmony thing but in alot of ways those sites just made it worse. I'm a nurse, so in a female dominated field, plus I work with babies, and most doctors just don't date nurses so no prospects there. I felt hopeless and just closed my heart to finding someone {else}.
I didn't feel like I had an identity without my ex so I stupidly went back to him thinking this time he would be different. Big mistake. Wasted another year thinking again he'd change but finally just had to face the facts...he just didn't love me. It was hard to let go even knowing that he just wasn't it....I didn't know anything different and I wanted him to be it.
Moved on for good but then became content with just being alone. I made my life about my family, career and traveling and that was that.
Fast forward a few years and I was in the library researching another trip I was going to take. I hadn't dated since I left my ex and wasn't even looking to date. I was minding my business when my now fiance, struck up a conversation about the travel books I was looking at. I made small talk with him but didn't think anything of it.
A few weeks went by and I ran into him again.... at the library. We talked more and eventually he asked me out. I blew him off 3 times before I finally agreed to go out with him. It was a great first date but things didn't go so smoothly after that. Dating was awkward for me, because a part of me still identified myself as I was with my ex.
erplexedBut my fiance didn't give up on me and I started to relax and be myself around him. But there was another problem in that I traveled for a living for my job so while I loved having him around I still hadn't opened my heart to anything other than a friendship which made it easy for me to leave the city once it was time to move on from my job. He however, never let the distance or the wall I put up destroy our relationship. I almost ruined it. Almost.
To make a long story short I eventually realized that if I kept pushing this man away that I was going to lose him for good and would have had no one to blame but myself. I had to wake up to the fact that my ex was long gone and I was worthy and capable of being loved and loving someone else. The past was indeed the past.
We dated for a year and 4 months before he asked me to marry him. i posted our engagement story in the Wedding section.
So in my case, the person that was supposed to be in my life came and I almost didn't let him in. In my case it was so true that he showed up when and where i least expected it.
So never give up hope, I had, but I guess hope didn't give up on me. I'm the happiest I've ever been in a long, long time.
MissYocairis
Well-Known Member
faithVA
Well-Known Member
I'll share my story:
I dated the same guy from my freshman year in high school to my senior year in college. And aside from us breaking up a few times, and me going out for a night or two with other guys, he was the only boyfriend I ever had. I thought he was the one and once we graduated college he'd marry me and we'd live happily ever after. Well it never happened. I kept hoping and thinking he just needed more time but long story short it took me years to realize he just wasn't the one.
I went into a serious depression having "wasted" 8 years of my life waiting on him. I just wish I would have opened my eyes sooner to the facts that were there all along.
My depression wasn't just because of mourning the loss of that relationship but with what was going on with life in general.
It took me about a year and half before I even opened my heart to trying to date again. I did the match.com and eharmony thing but in alot of ways those sites just made it worse. I'm a nurse, so in a female dominated field, plus I work with babies, and most doctors just don't date nurses so no prospects there. I felt hopeless and just closed my heart to finding someone {else}.
I didn't feel like I had an identity without my ex so I stupidly went back to him thinking this time he would be different. Big mistake. Wasted another year thinking again he'd change but finally just had to face the facts...he just didn't love me. It was hard to let go even knowing that he just wasn't it....I didn't know anything different and I wanted him to be it.
Moved on for good but then became content with just being alone. I made my life about my family, career and traveling and that was that.
Fast forward a few years and I was in the library researching another trip I was going to take. I hadn't dated since I left my ex and wasn't even looking to date. I was minding my business when my now fiance, struck up a conversation about the travel books I was looking at. I made small talk with him but didn't think anything of it.
A few weeks went by and I ran into him again.... at the library. We talked more and eventually he asked me out. I blew him off 3 times before I finally agreed to go out with him. It was a great first date but things didn't go so smoothly after that. Dating was awkward for me, because a part of me still identified myself as I was with my ex.
But my fiance didn't give up on me and I started to relax and be myself around him. But there was another problem in that I traveled for a living for my job so while I loved having him around I still hadn't opened my heart to anything other than a friendship which made it easy for me to leave the city once it was time to move on from my job. He however, never let the distance or the wall I put up destroy our relationship. I almost ruined it. Almost.
To make a long story short I eventually realized that if I kept pushing this man away that I was going to lose him for good and would have had no one to blame but myself. I had to wake up to the fact that my ex was long gone and I was worthy and capable of being loved and loving someone else. The past was indeed the past.
We dated for a year and 4 months before he asked me to marry him. i posted our engagement story in the Wedding section.
So in my case, the person that was supposed to be in my life came and I almost didn't let him in. In my case it was so true that he showed up when and where i least expected it.
So never give up hope, I had, but I guess hope didn't give up on me. I'm the happiest I've ever been in a long, long time.
I am glad you are happy. Congratulations on your engagement. Hope you have a beautiful wedding day.
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